Original subtitles

once upon a time when things were rotten

not just food but also King goodbye

everybody

[Music]

so when other Legends are forgotten

we'll remember back from things

[Music]

kept forward expensive so when other

Legends are forgotten we'll remember

back from things

foreign

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announced the main course and do not

shout in my ear

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oh

allow me to do the honors my liege I'll

have a drumstick Hubert Lobby that's an

ox

oxes don't have drumsticks

oh

make it a wing

I'll just have a small Toft and some

crackers

okay all right

I certainly missed it up north

country Bertram I went up there to

collect

up with their habitual tardiness last

month they said that their taxes got

lost in the laundry what's their excuse

this month equally poor they blamed it

on the plague

and they expect us to be sympathetic

fake

that's your basic plague

people lying in the streets moaning

groaning giving out with occasional

shrieks eyes bulging out Crossing oh

you haven't touched your food

I've lost my appetite thank you oh let

me do where was I oh yes moldy bread no

righteous

fingernails curling eyelashes falling

off teeth itching not through flaring

obstetricalum equilibrium too believe me

you don't want to hear about it oh

oh oh stop packing we gotta get out of

here we saved them the wrong ox and it

was contaminated they're going to get so

sick and when they get better we better

not be here

from now on we're known as The Galloping

gourmets

it is Proclamation time

[Music]

I hereby Proclaim that we obey King

Richard's urgent request to send him the

Royal seal of England

the only authorized seal of approval

without which he cannot sign treaties

and could maybe end up dead

the end

let no man say that we are not loyal to

the wishes of King Richard

the Royal seal

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[Laughter]

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well there it is Lads King Richard's

Royal seal the official Mark of England

yes and without it King Richard is

powerless to make the alliances he needs

to return home safely well we'll get it

to Richard on the next boat to the

Crusades let's go

wait no this way I know a shortcut this

chambermaid told me now that's what I

call good main sir

thank you

foreign

man this way

[Music]

thank you

[Laughter]

all right guys

[Laughter]

I don't suppose you're gonna let us uh

Bunny Hop our way out of here are you

Boogaloo

very well that it's business as usual

ready

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[Applause]

foreign

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[Applause]

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prepare to die

[Applause]

I've got the plague help me someone I

think I've got the plague

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if it is the plague no one must leave

this room

we run a grave risk of infecting all of

Nottingham now parks are Nottingham

precisely then who will you have to tax

to oppress to Scourge and humiliate good

point Robin

although I hate to admit it I think you

may be right

oh that hurt listen all of you

to keep the plague from spreading we

must stay here for 24 hours that's the

incubation period now after that time

everyone who's still alive may leave

everyone who's not

well I'm afraid you'll have to stay I

will be hearing confessions over there

it might be smart to have your bets

covered

if you know what I mean and I think you

do

Robin

let us Skip One Thing straight this

throne room is my turn I'll run the show

not you

I don't know Sheriff when it comes to

leadership I'm a natural you know I have

an image to maintain here

very well it's your plague

isolate all the plague victims and make

them comfortable ladies fold some

bandages and get plenty of hot water I

thought we agreed that I would be in

charge here well what do you want from

me it's in my blood

[Laughter]

don't give up my leash hang in there

I Had You full didn't I

mean funny John Boy

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laughs

you did what

for your Penance do five Hail Marys and

eight our fathers

that and 20 push-ups

folding folding folding

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foreign

Bell that was wonderful

you can get up now Isabelle

oh no what a downer

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it's young Gilbert Robin I have courage

Gilbert men see to him

Robert my hands are shaking my mouth is

drier than a dust mop I'm dripping with

sweat you think I'm coming down with a

plague I don't think so little John like

all of us you're just a little scared me

scared little John scared

I've never been afraid of anything in my

life

Hold Me Oh Robin I'm so scared

[Music]

[Applause]

hey Rob this Blake isn't kidding around

man that's too down

I know Ronaldo but whatever happens we

must get the seal to King Richard yeah

the way we're dropping off the seal is

going to have to take the seal to King

Richard

it won't be easy but if I know our

friend the sheriff whoever is left

standing will have to fight their way

out of here if any other merry men are

left standing they'll have to fight

their way out of here what did I tell

you you will soon need your strength

fill your bellies I recommend the bagels

and dogs

[Music]

oh Friar we're gonna miss you man thank

you Ronaldo what do you mean you're

gonna pull through fryer fry you have to

pull through I don't know Robin this

plague is bigger than the both of me

Robin I don't think I can handle it

courage Little John

now listen all of you

I want

oh

I want you all

to carry on

I I don't think that's what the friar

had in mind right fire not really

[Music]

made Marion wanted in plague Ward four

Maid Marion wanted and played board I

have to go now

oh one last question do you love Major

Medical

I ask you a favor please of course

Bertram if it's a small one could you

fetch me another pillow

a bit higher

just a bit lower please

maybe a smidge to the left oh

a bit to the right bathroom

[Music]

one last request then

very well bathroom what is it

no

I want to be one of Robin's merry men

what

better one of them should go

than one of us

my patreon

genuinely touched

fluff up my pillow

put to the left

snitch to the right

that's nice thank you

[Applause]

Robin come quickly I think Friar Tuck's

taking a turn for the worse he's acting

awfully funny

fire why are you acting so strangely I'm

just hearing my own confession Robin

it's a good flyer because I've got a

little confession of my own to make

have your attention please

and now I'd like to introduce to you

your next plague victim a wonderful

human being and close personal friend

me

but I want to tell you

[Music]

thank you

[Applause]

Alan

dear Allen I'm going fast Rubble please

listen

one last request what

Melancholy baby

another of their side Bites the Dust We

will soon outnumber them is that good

Hubert yes

oh it just occurred to me this plague

might have a silver lining what yes

today might be the day that we see the

great Robin Hood double over in pain

yes yes that's the idea

yes that's it exactly and then he would

begin to moan piteously and cry for help

oh

I didn't mean it this time

you Bird please my lease

[Music]

he's good

the die is cast

the prince Has Fallen

but we shall survive for we are the

strongest this is a simple matter of

Mind Over Matter and all that matters in

this matter is our minds and if our

minds matter the

matter no matter what

what's the matter

Alan are you comfortable

yeah I make a nice living I got a few

coins tucked away so assuming I'm

irrepressible

Marion

I am a man of few words and our present

situation cries out for bluntness I have

always been whenever I see your face

all these years your presence are are

kind of stirring now

how shall I say it

all these years

oh Robin

how I wish we could be together these

final moments so do I Marion for once I

envy the sheriff talking to my beloved

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foreign

[Music]

I love you

[Music]

thanks but I'm already going straight

and although uh

it looks like we might not pull through

this and uh

in case we don't well I I just want you

to know that I'm

I'm sorry for all the times I've

mistrusted you I'm proud to have served

in the merry men with you

hey that's nice man thanks

hey you big and strong you're gonna make

it

but in case I don't make it

I want you to have this belt buckle

gee thanks

wait a minute

this is mine

oh that's where I got it

thank you

[Music]

oh

oh oh

I've been quick it's little John ah what

Robin think it's me oh Cedar Ronaldo I

can take it Ronaldo hang in there I'm

going Robin I'm going going gone no no

no no you can make it Ronaldo I'm going

this is it I can tell

I see your whole life passing before my

eyes

no no Ronaldo you're supposed to see

your life not mine

I know but you met a better class of

people

well it's up to me now

I'm alone now

I'm the last

[Music]

you me make Marion and him her

sorry

fitting irony don't you agree

that you and I are the last to remain

yes

but I'll not let the plague do my job

for me don't hit mine

a battle to the end then

stop this I won't have any fighting

sorry Marion but this is between us

all right drop them

freeze Marion put that thing down no

drop those swords I'll use this if I

have to they're bluffing try me I think

she means business maybe but she can

only get one of us yes and I hope I'm

not the one

okay

away from them nice and easy no tricks

[Music]

that's better

now sit down at the table and no more

fighting

and Marion may be right you don't look

quite up to Snuff for the battle anyway

you look a little Peak at yourself sir

nothing that a little food wouldn't cure

I haven't eaten all day come to think of

it I haven't either no

I hardly

tell it at the banquet

[Music]

did Brooklyn have a chance to sup before

he killed over bird from the scavenger

stuck a pig

oh you're much too harsh Sheriff

everyone ate heartily except you and I

of course

[Music]

it's the ox well of course it's the ox

what do you think it was chicken

no no no no it's the ox all right

that was delicious a toast to good food

good wine and bad women tend to Good

King Richard

well I know you don't like him that's

ridiculous no it's the plague oh that's

what it is

[Music]

Goodbye cruel world

Thanks for the Memories I I have no

regrets I I did it my way I leave my

legacy of evil resting gentle on my mind

off Robin oh no no pity yourself for you

won't have Cuba to kick around anymore

good life Mrs Calabash

Wherever You Are

[Music]

it's a Pity to weigh such a great death

scene what

plague it was a simple case of 20

King Richard gets his Royal seal away

lads

[Music]

you know Sharon I was just thinking yes

Bertram

it's a shame it wasn't the plague

if it were

Robin Hood would be dead now Bertram so

would we

you know what Herbert that's Hubert

Malia right Hubert

after a scare like the plague I'm glad

I'm still a living breathing member of

the Hermann race that's human race my

league good night princess Isabel good

night Sheriff good night John Boy good

night Isabel can I marry him good night

Prince John good night Marion

night Sharon

we never saw that Ox again and As I Grew

Older I I often wondered what became of

it and if it ever knew the part it

played in teaching us all a great lesson

that memorable day in Nottingham Castle

when things were rotten

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foreign

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