Original subtitles

Ice tea baby, Ice tea.

Warden O'Brien, Warden O'Brien, four two nine.

Move it up, to the right no talking.

Close it up men, tighten it up.

We can't have no talking, move up.

Up to the gates and stop.

295...

296...

281...

280...

I'm sorry Harry...

I was picking up your shirts and I couldn't find a place to park.

It figures Max, all you had is nine months.

Thank God you're back Harry.

Here you are Harry.

They gave you a quarter for car fare.

You got the figures?

Let's go.

Hey, Max.

I didn't want to upset you, Harry.

- The week I go in there's a 10% drop. - Yeah, Harry.

Down two grand...

down four... down two and a half

Yeah, I know.

Turn you back and everything goes to hell.

Hey Max, remind me I gotta go to the parole office.

Yeah, Harry.

Louie... Harry P.

Yeah.

Listen, I want a piece of the lay-off action.

Yeah, same as always.

There they are.

- Fernando... Jesus. - Nice to have you back, Mr P.

- So where's the others? - Um...

Jimmy said corner of Glenmont.

Well let's go, Max.

How about Julie?

- Jesus, I said where's Julie? - He no work no more, Mr P.

Is that right?

What's going on Jesus?

Mr P, wait for Jimmy, we no speak no English.

All of a sudden you no speak no English?

Yeah, he's here. I just got him off the plane.

Who's that?

I forgot to tell you, Harry, it's you sister.

What's she doing in town?

Hello, Mae?

Sure I'm glad to see you.

So how's your diabetes?

Hey, Max, get 'em.

Listen Mae, I gotta hang up.

Yeah, at the hotel, right.

Hi, Mr P.

- How are you feeling? - Ok, ok, let's go, Max.

What I wanna know, Jimmy, is where is Julie?

He say Big Julie independent now.

And Carlos went in with him, huh?

- So sorry, Mr P. - Sure, he owes me 1,200 bucks.

-What are they saying? - They're very nervous, Mr P.

- They say Big Julie make Big trouble. - Tell 'em I take care of Big Julie.

Listen, Big Julie finished, you understand? Finito.

- What are they saying? - That they are nervous.

Listen, each of ya, each of ya. Listen, each of ya.

Five percent more off the top, huh? You understand?

- What are they saying? - They say they stay loyal to you.

Sure.

Sure muchachos, we'll make some nice money together.

- How are ya Harry? - Great Mae, fine.

I'm so excited... I'm out of breath.

So how's your room?

Like a queen they treat me on account of you.

That's good.

But the room service, if you want I should tell you?

They got foreign,

you ask for wholewheat, they bring you white every time.

Later Harry, I want you to meet my friends.

When Arnie died, they stayed with me night and day.

Yeah yeah.

They almost didn't come, her mother had an accident.

Look at her leg.

A nice place huh?

For me it's too much chlorine.

So this is Harry?

- How do you do? - Already I feel I know him.

Sit mother, sit.

- She's half blind. - You should hear her play the piano.

Mr Plotnick, call for Mr Plotnick.

He's lived here for years.

Listen Mae, I got some business.

He works too hard.

Half the kids on the block they went to jail... not Harry.

Out working since he's eight years old.

Some sons should treat their mothers, like you treat your sister, Mr Plotnick.

Listen Mae...

go out and have a ball, huh?

What's he taking so long?

It's this kinda trouble you don't need, Harry.

Very close family.

How do you think he made it so big, a man my age?

On top of you know what,

he's got legit 12 laundromats and a diaper service in Queens.

They gave it to him.

Harry, don't do it.

I told you Max, if Julie gets away with it, I'm finished.

- Take extras. - Shut up.

- Thank you. - You're welcome.

My uncle says ok.

Listen Tony, I don't want him hurt too bad.

Just so he don't work my side of the street.

Come and shake hands.

- I don't want to bother him now. - What's the matter?

- Here you are, honey. - Thank you.

This is my youngest daughter, she graduating college.

- Hello. - How do you do?

And this is her fiancé, he's graduating law school.

- How do you do? - How do you do?

Tony, show him the rose garden.

It's a beautiful spread, Mr Natale.

- Hello, Mr P. - I come for my 1,200 bucks, Carlos.

- I pay you soon, Mr P. - I tell you what, Carlos...

Come back in with me, you owe nothing.

Carlos, you ever hear of my friend, Natale?

You know who I'm talking about.

Now you go tell Big Julie, I've been to see Natale.

Okay.

- My aunt, she say you got big ambition. - Oh yeah?

But she say you got a good angel, watch over you.

You just watch it Max, couple of weeks we got a smooth operation again.

Yeah.

You see that? This'll teach him.

Watch it Harry!

Jesus.

Maybe you killed somebody?

Damn idiot! He deliberately swerved into the car with a baby.

That damn idiot, that damn idiot!

With a baby and a brand new woman.

Get his registration.

I'm not gonna let him get away with it.

- Just calm down. - I'll pay for everything.

Leo?

- Leo Perlmutter. - Harry Plotnick.

Thank God nobody was hurt.

My wife, Cheryl. My ex-brother in law, Harry.

How do you do?

I always knew you'd be the death of us, Harry.

Hello Kay.

Margie...

this is your father.

Last time I saw you, you were three.

- Well, she's dead. - Who?

- I want my blanket. - The engine.

Well this is my husband Mel,

and my daughter Linda.

I coulda killed you.

This is my father.

What, are you kidding?

- It's a beautiful car, Harry. - A couple of real estate deals.

It's for you, Harry.

No, you got the wrong number.

Tell 'em I ain't in.

You're still living at the end of a telephone.

Harry, it's your sister.

You see, it's Mae.

Hello Mae, guess who I got in the car?

Kay... yeah my Kay.

- She wants to talk to you. - Go ahead, Kay.

Hello Mae.

Sure I know your voice.

Hey Lindy, say hi grandpa.

- Go ahead. - Hi grandpa.

What a laugh.

- What is it honey? - Oh it's nothing.

I'm sorry, Mae. Do you have to smoke?

- Maybe you got hurt. - I just had a contraction.

- We ought to see the doctor. - Ma, what's the matter with you?

Well you don't want to have it in the car, do you?

I don't know Mae, she maybes having a baby.

No Margie, my daughter.

Right Mae, right.

Listen, don't worry about the car, we got seat covers and everything.

Thank God we're almost here.

Three thirteen and four seventy five

and seven twenty eight...

Yeah, Benny's out of town.

Yeah, in Sing Sing.

- I hope they're good. - The way you like them, Mr P.

Hi.

Lois?

Lois couldn't make it, I'm Cherie, remember?

- Give the lady some wine, Pierre. - No thanks.

What's for dessert?

Yeah?

- Oh hello Mrs Klepper. - Tell her I've gone to bed.

He's gone to bed.

Yeah, he wasn't feeling so good.

I worry about him too.

I do take care of him, I try.

- Harry? - He's asleep.

Shhh momma, you'll wake him.

He's hot, but he always ran a high fever.

Let him sleep Mae, come on.

- What is it? - Shhh, go to sleep.

Leave me alone.

Thank God I got the vaporizer.

- Harry, you need a doctor. - Let me sleep.

- We better go, mother. - Turn out the light, huh?

- I know when I'm not wanted. - Mae!

You don't understand, Mae.

Harry?

- What do you want? - There's a parole officer downstairs.

Under no circumstance will I apply for a hunting license.

I will not drive a car without obtaining permission from my parole officer.

I will find steady employment.

Now that's very important, Harry.

I agree to keep reasonable hours

but this does not prevent me from working nights.

I agree to receive medical treatment for any social disease

and to attend a mental hygiene clinic if necessary.

If I were you Harry, I'd pay attention.

Excuse me Miss Pike, I don't feel so hot.

Hey Max.

I will not consort with known criminals.

Any infraction of this rule will result in my immediate return.

Just tell him goodbye,

and a sister like that you don't find on the streets.

- Mae! Mae! - Harry!

- Mae! - Harry!

Harry?!

- What did I do? - Officer, I called an ambulance.

- I don't need no ambulance. - Take it easy.

I ate too fast, that's all.

Harry... I'm staying.

What's your name?

Shapiro

Harry Shapiro.

The admission says you had TB, Mr Shapiro?

Yeah, when I was a kid.

I don't get it, there's no scar.

Anyway Mr Shapiro, you're heart is twice the size it ought to be.

- That's bad, huh? - Well it isn't good.

So it ain't cancer?

Right, ok.

- You're all set Harry. - Thanks.

You get some rest.

How are you today, Mr Shapiro?

How are you feeling, Harry?

Great, you got the figures?

How about Fernando?

He didn't show, Harry.

I gotta get outta here.

- You tell 'em. - Harry, it's your heart.

I didn't have no attack.

With your heart, an attack woulda killed you.

- Thanks a lot. - It's true Harry, it was a warning.

They said no excitement, plenty of rest and easy in the bedroom.

- That's what they said. - Listen, I know when I'm sick.

I ate too fast, that's all, I was constipated.

Yeah and where, if you're so smart,

do I get 50 pieces of strudel at this time of day?

Do be a favour Bernie, go look.

There she is.

That's a very nice car.

Listen Leo,

I don't want to accident report, I pay enough insurance.

Yeah, I'm waiting.

Only God can make a voice like that.

Listen Harry, do me a favour.

We run a Kosher cuisine, put this on huh?

Look Leo, I gotta go.

You haven't even seen Kay, go on.

I'll take 50.

Right now, this place is up for sale,

and some Chang wants to buy it.

- They got no vision and no love. - Why don't you buy it?

I got no money like that. Yeah great, send them over.

What's the profit on a place like this?

Well he's making a good 20,000 a year.

Am I working on case?!

What's he asking?

54.

Look, if I buy it, you wanna run it?

You got that kinda money, Harry?

Let's just say I ain't a poor man.

She has a human touch.

She even gets along with the waiters union.

How come she ain't married?

Who knows.

You see that fellow over there? That's Dr Feinstein.

He's a widower with grown children.

All he does is root canal work.

He's been after her for two years.

Listen Leo,

if I'm interested in buying, what's the deal?

Well I was thinking Harry, how about fifty fifty?

Leo, I'm putting up the cash.

Thirty seventy, no trading.

Now you realise Harry, I split with Kay.

- Hello, Harry. - Harry, I want you to meet

the treasurer of our temple and the president of our catering committee,

Jack Pomerance.

- How do you do? - Pleased to meet you.

Listen Leo,

I'm trying to get Kay here to come down and catch our show tomorrow.

Why don't you invite Harry? He's her father.

- What Millie's? - That's right.

Excuse me, Jack.

Mr Plotnick, your daughter has a wonderful talent.

Harry, I guess nobody told you...

- ...but you got another daughter. - What?

You see, Kay was pregnant when she left you

and she didn't know it herself.

This you gotta see, Harry.

Ladies and gentlemen, our candlelight ceremony.

As I call your names,

please join the Bar Mitzvah boy and his parents.

Grandma and Grandpa Levinson.

Grandma Spiegelberg.

Great Aunt Rivka.

Uncle Benjamin.

Aunt Zora and Uncle Milton.

It's beautiful huh?

It stays with them the rest of their lives.

Miss Ella Watson.

The Waxman family.

Mrs Helen Shapiro.

Ok Harry, you got a deal.

Thirty seventy. So I won't get rich, so what?

Listen, I might need an office with a phone Leo.

I got a beautiful room for you.

Cousin Vera.

Saul and Joanne Ettinger.

And now, an under-wire bra that defines the bosom.

Notice the wire is comfortably outside the cup

to give softness next to the skin.

If a man's interest is any indication,

I know you'll like this little stretch bra.

Where is she now?

Cups and panels completely wrinkle-proof.

Mille is wearing a bra that's been washed sixteen times.

I know what you're thinking Kay.

I think it's in very good taste, Jack.

Well she isn't your daughter.

Now listen Kay, I don't like your attitude.

It so happens I want your Millie to marry my son.

How old does a girl have to be for intimate-wear?

Well Perkins has the answers for you

with our new Cinderella line.

Listen Miss Muffet, pretty please with sugar on it.

How man people you got working?

Oh, including the plant, maybe 600.

Started with almost nothing.

Kay tells me you're in gambling?

I used to be.

Listen, maybe you got some tips for me.

Not just a plain body, but a planned body.

You'll find these new members of our family,

a big contribution to your store.

Listen Harry,

even if Katz sells, it's not going to work.

- Why not? - Because it's gotta go to the rabbi.

He's got to approve, so does the whole catering committee.

It's legit, I'm buying it.

Harry, you made your money gambling.

So we buy in your name.

It's done all the time.

- What are you doing here? - Harry, they arrested Jesus.

- Then you pay. - I've been trying to reach you, Harry.

Yesterday I go down to see the Captain and he wouldn't take it.

Julie got to him.

And now the painted garden that blooms...

Hey Max, this ain't no burlesque.

And here's "Bonheur", it's French for good luck.

And good luck for all of you.

Harry, Millie wants to meet you.

- Hi. - I hope you weren't shocked?

- No no, I think it was very artistic. - Millie wants to be a dancer.

- Or an actress. - Or a singer.

Maybe I got some leads for you. I got some good connections.

- I don't think that's a good idea. - That's for trying.

- They're beautiful kids, Kay. - I gotta get back.

And so we close our fall show,

as lovely Millie, eternally feminine,

brings you greetings from Perkins, our president Jack Pomerance,

and the entire sales force.

Okay, break it up, break it up.

Okay Julie, tell you what I'll do.

I'll go fifty-fifty with you.

You ain't got nothing to trade, Harry.

Julie, Julie!

I fished you out of the gutter. Where's your appreciation?

- That wasn't fair, Leonard. - I can't even talk with you.

I told you Harry, this is my day with the boys.

So it's no deal?

If I had your money Mr P, I'd retire.

And lay around some beach?

Very good, Willie.

Maybe you ain't heard Julie, but I got friends.

You're all washed up.

- You wanna bet?! - Harry!

I alone, Jesus.

PR, San Juan.

Unemployed. Married.

Violation of penal code section 318.

Previous arrests: six.

Convictions: 2.

Defendant pleads guilty.

Mr Plotnick?

- What's that? - A subpoena.

I didn't do nothing.

Well all we want you to do is answer some questions about Salvatore Natale.

Who's he?

You were seen leaving his house, Mr Plotnick.

It's a parole violation Harry, consorting.

Go ahead and take it.

What happened? I told you to come this morning.

You told me to bring money, I didn't have it.

Sidney?

Did I ever turn you down, huh? I'm a good-hearted shnuck.

- Sidney, what about this? - Wait a minute.

Nice try counsellor.

- Now don't forget tomorrow. - Thank you so much.

Her boyfriend stabs her and she wants to marry him.

- I've been subpoenaed. - I know, I know.

Joey, did they give you the drunkometer test?

- You wanna make a deal with the DA? - Yeah.

Now all I have to do is sell it to the DA.

For a man on parole, Harry,

it's a very good idea to cooperate with the authorities.

- Hey Tony. - Wait a minute.

I ain't got all day.

Okay, talk.

- You made some promises, Tony. -Yeah I know, I've been busy.

You see my uncle down there? Cancer.

All we done for weeks is go from one doctor to another.

On top of which they're trying to deport him.

I tell ya, we live in a police state.

Tony, I've been subpoenaed.

You know nothing, you say nothing. You know something, you take the fifth.

Tony, you don't want me to talk, you gotta help.

What is that, a threat?

I thought Jewish people are supposed to be smart?

Get in.

Harry, that's a very sensitive area up there.

I mean, the people they wanna bet with their own kind.

You see what I'm trying to bring out?

I built that business Tony, sixteen years it took me.

The neighbourhood changed Harry, what are you gonna do?

Tony...

Anyway, you still got you lay-off business.

Tony, you gonna come through?

- Okay Harry, I'll take care of it. - That a promise?

Harry, I know you from the year one, when are you gonna grow up?

That's wonderful Robbie.

Now you be a good boy.

I hope that ain't California.

Right, I'll see you Sunday.

Harry...

Let's get comfy.

- Put on your clothes. - Listen, I been here an hour.

You'll get paid.

Yeah Max.

So all I got left is Jimmy?

Well, I made some plans.

Listen, call Leo, tell him I'll split sixty forty, that'll clinch it.

You're in the fur business?

Take one.

Go one, take one.

Why don't you stay and talk with me?

Listen Harry, I don't go in for queer stuff.

I said talk! I got a bum heart.

Where are you from? I mean your home.

Upstate.

Hey, I paid a lot of money for that.

- You really got a bad heart? - Yeah.

Well you get a lot of stories.

All of a sudden a guy don't feel so good.

- Mae, it's so nice to see you. - Oh it's wonderful to see you, Leo.

- Darryl... Jeffrey. - He looks wonderful.

You need anything Mr Weisz, just ask.

Well, before the ceremony, I do like to meet with the mother and the child.

Sure.

Not now Harry.

Fifty five grand Leo, you'd better count it.

Listen, I'm worried. See, I haven't even told Kay.

How are the horses, Harry?

Jack, he used to be in numbers.

Listen Harry,

later on my wife wants to meet you. She's got a little project for you.

Oh?

- What's he kissing her for? - He's a Jewish Humphrey Bogart.

Kay... Margie too.

I got you a couple of coats.

Put 'em down.

There's one for Millie too.

That's very nice of you, Harry.

A very nice place, Kay.

Inside South America... You really bettered yourself.

Harry, you're the grandpa. Later on you're gonna hold him.

Honey, I talked to the rabbi. He said it's ok to take pictures.

What exactly are you going to photograph?

Honey, it's an important event.

Here you are Harry. There's nothing to it.

I got it from Schleppy Meyer, remember?

I hear he went of his nut or cut his throat or something.

All right everybody, let's go.

So the runners report to the writers.

And the writers to the controllers.

And the controllers to the banker.

Yeah that's right, Mrs Pomerance.

And that ok course, is you?

Yeah.

- Hey Max. - Yeah.

Maybe you can drop us at Jimmy's?

You know Harry, you could be very helpful to me.

Oh yeah?

You see, I'm taking an advanced degree

and I might just write a paper about you.

Oh.

Just look at those conditions.

You gotta figure Mrs Pomerance, those guys don't wanna work.

Oh well now that isn't their fault, Harry.

The hell it ain't.

- Believe me, I grew up in this neighbourhood. - I see.

Excuse me, Mrs Pomerance,

but was your maiden name Brotsky?

What are you talking about?

Well my mother says maybe we're related.

- I mean distantly. - I don't think so.

I'll tell you a secret, I'm not even Jewish.

Oh.

- I hope we can do this again, Harry. - I'll tell you Mrs Pomerance

let's stop here later, right now I'll show you more of the layout.

Let's go Max.

Hello Harry.

What's going on Jimmy?

- I talked to your friend Tony. - Oh yeah?

He's a smart man, very smart.

He'll be sorry.

You come around here again Mr P, I'm gonna have you arrested.

Just like Jesus.

How about a nice drink, Harry?

I gotta see my lawyer.

You gotta hand it to them, they put on a beautiful ceremony.

Personally, I always had a lot of respect for Catholics.

Like the priest said: He was a judge with a heart.

It's very nice of you to give us a lift, Mr Plotnick.

Only way I get to see my lawyer.

Look Harry, I got a heavy schedule huh?

All right, so what's your decision?

I'm gonna tell that committee everything I know.

Teach Natale to kick me around.

Great, so you wake up with a hole in the head.

Maybe I don't live so long anyways.

May I have your attention please,

a warm buffet is now being served in the last car.

Irene, it's a lovely party.

- I told you Jack. - All I said was you can't hear anybody.

But that's the point, that's what we're doing to American life.

You wouldn't believe it Harry,

but most of the people here have never used the subway.

We want to show them what it's like.

Thank you very much, thank you.

- Oh hello. - Hi.

- What's that? - Harry, you're my guest.

Just a minute. Listen, I'm paying my way.

How much? Three, four, what? Go ahead.

That's very nice of you, Harry.

Jack, Irene, I want you to know I think you're beautiful people, both of you.

I mean it. Doing things for others.

I'm very touched, Harry.

- What? - I'm very touched.

Mr Plotnick, on Friday I'm giving a little party...

No poaching Connie.

I want you to know Jack, it's a pleasure to be here.

It's a pleasure to have you, Harry.

I even got a new suit.

They can bury me in it.

-What's going on? - Hi, I'm Steve Pomerance.

- Oh yeah? - If it's ok with you, I'd like to take some pictures of you.

Ok kid, go ahead.

Isn't it true, Mr Plotnick

that from August to April you served a prison sentence on gambling charges?

- Yeah. - And before that, how many times were you under arrest?

How many times was I under arrest?

You don't have to repeat the question.

- Seven times. - With how many convictions?

Just one.

What business were you in before you went into numbers?

- Mae! - You took bets on horses.

- It's your Harry. - For how many years?

He's talking to a senator.

Mr Plotnick,

what is the nature of your relationship to Salvatore Natale?

His nephew and me, we grew up on the same block.

I thought you wanted to co-operate with the Commissioner?

All I know Mr Vitale, is every month you gotta send money upstairs.

To the syndicate.

Money that helps to finance the drug traffic and prostitution.

Believe me Mr Commissioner, I had nothing to do with that.

- An entire life, spent in the rackets. - Yeah, your honor.

Mr Plotnick, what do you know of the widespread, legitimate holdings

of syndicate members like Natale?

- I didn't get that. - Your honor,

due to a wartime injury, my client is sometimes a little hard of hearing.

I heard, I just didn't understand.

Mr Plotnick,

the purpose of this commission is to uncover the connection between

organised crime and legitimate business enterprise.

Gentlemen,

in the first place I'd like to point out

that the only thing my client really knows

is the numbers operation.

And even here, as I'm sure you can appreciate,

he was just a small time operator.

A little cog in the big machine.

So in principle I would agree, Mr Plotnick is a two-bit racketeer

who has nothing more to tell the commission. I move for dismissal.

Is there anything you wish to say, Mr Plotnick?

Yeah your honor.

I don't like being called a two-bit racketeer, especially on TV.

I mean, I just bet Mr Vitale, I drive a better car than you.

Right now I'm trying to be a good citizen and a loyal American.

How much are you worth Mr Plotnick?

130 thousand, maybe a little more.

What you made in the numbers?

Yeah, but I got a legitimate thing now.

- And what's that? - Well I'm in the catering business.

Excuse me for disturbing you, Rabbi.

Well I wonder if you happen to be watching TV?

Under what name do you operate, Mr Plotnick?

I respectfully decline to answer on account of...

I'm taking the fifth.

You're client is under a grant of immunity, Counsellor.

Go ahead, answer the question.

Monaco Catering.

Did you file an annual tax return?

State and federal, every year for 16 years.

Thank you. Next witness.

That's your third, Harry.

Quit buggin me.

Kay, see the show?

Wait till she finds out.

- I thought you were gone? - No, Mr Television star.

Everybody saw, it's just a matter of time.

- How did she take it? - Very poorly.

You know what I think you are, Mr Plotnick?

A disgrace to the Jewish people.

Are you Jewish?

- Yeah. - Your phone is tapped.

Oh yeah?

One forty two,six bits.

It can't stay here if I've got to pack and get out.

Four thirty two, half a buck.

One eighty two, pass.

Four eighty three, hold.

What are you doing here?

She's taking some pictures of me, I was just making a phone call.

What are you going to do?

I'm not coming home if that's what you mean.

Of course not, that would make sense.

If you really wanna know, I'm pregnant.

Pardon me, sir.

Uh, Miss Plotnick?

You know her or something?

I shoot photo essay, average American girl.

- Hi. - My bags are over there.

Listen Benny, I gotta hang up.

- Harry? - Hold.

Yeah?

Could I stay at your hotel?

Sure.

What's the matter, honey?

Don't worry, I'll take care of her.

Giovanni, find a better job, huh?

Yes.

- How do you like the old country style? - It's okay.

He's given you the deluxe.

By the way Tony, you'll notice I didn't say nothing to that committee.

You didn't know nothing, Harry.

The reason I wanna talk to you...

- I got a problem. - Oh yeah?

I got a cousin, needs some money.

He's looking to get in the lay-off business.

Don't tell me, I know.

I build it up you take it away.

Who cares if Harry Plotnick starves to death?!

- Thank you. - Better take care of yourself, Harry.

All right folks, this is the heel or lead exercise.

I want everybody to lead their dogs, double-time.

Pull it.

About turn.

Let's go with it, let's go a little faster.

Hello Harry.

- Hello Leo. - Kay told me you'd be here.

- What's the matter, Leo? - Harry, they subpoenaed my books.

Oh, they want mine too. They checking my taxes, that's all.

Well it so happens if you got a tax problem, they attach my business.

I mean it is half mine, isn't it?

Well don't worry Leo, Max is good at those taxes.

I don't know why they give me this dog.

A dog like that makes you safe in the house.

- You said you wanted to see me about Millie? - Yeah.

- I got Max watching her day and night. - Come on, Flax.

Sit.

This is yesterday:

8am, breakfast in room, OJ, coffee, cigarettes.

8.40, left hotel.

11.10, called for messages... none.

6.50, Pomerance in lobby.

- The father or the son? -It don't say.

7.10, big fight, must be the son.

You see, he's watching her day and night.

Thanks Harry, that's very sweet of you.

By the way honey, I quit the rackets.

No more phone calls.

- Stop it. - You don't believe me?

Stop it!

You know something, Harry?

You oughta join the temple.

- Huh? - What kind of life you got?

Hotel rooms, big cars and cheap women.

Are you ready folks?

Down you dogs, bring them down.

Why don't you try moving out of the city?

Get closer to your kids.

- Ok honey.

- Better take a reading. - Go ahead.

Honey, your skin is light and that wrap is dark.

You gotta take it off.

Well gee honey.

Come on.

Well that's a good pose, that's nice.

Good, now for a little bit of direction.

Good.

And try something a little bit more animated.

Okay, get your hand out of the way. Good, okay.

Yeah?

No thanks Leo, I want nothing to do with his books.

Got enough trouble with our own.

Leo, the man's a crook.

Mystic knights of the sojourners,

Knight commander Leo Perlmutter

has proposed for membership his brother-in-law, Harry Plotnick.

Brother Plotnick was once on the wrong path,

but is now on his way to a good and worthy life,

as witnessed by a $2,000 cheque

to the children's hospital of our noble order.

Brother Plotnick,

hear now this oath to which you will swear:

- If I reveal the secret... - Never!

May my tongue be ripped out by its roots.

Aye!

And my heart be devoured by vultures.

Swear!

Brother Plotnick, raise your right hand.

We'll be here another hour keeping a light burning in the darkness,

so call us with your comments and questions.

Our guest tonight: Ex-gambler, Harry Plotnick.

Harry, now that you've quit the rackets, how do you feel about the past?

Well, I figure it wasn't worth it.

Well, what are you planning to do with your life?

I don't know.

I guess maybe telling the kids to keep off the streets,

away from the bad element.

- You wanna make amends? - Yeah.

I mean I've thrown away my marriage, a couple of beautiful kids, for what?

- It's absurd Leo. - I think he's very sincere.

Time for a break folks,

this is Sammy Warner reminding you count your blessings.

Planning a trip south of the border, why not let...

Remember, I mentioned my former brother-in-law, the former gambler?

Yeah, well he's on the air now.

Right, you might wanna listen Rabbi.

It gives you food for thought.

The Sammy Warner show, good evening.

Harry, Mr Jack Wiley wants to know,

if you're trying to make up for the past,

how come you're keeping the money you made in the rackets?

Harry?

I ain't keeping it, I've been giving it away.

I guess that answers your question Mr Wiley, thank you for calling.

Well folks, this is an interesting problem we have here.

What do you do with money you've made illegally?

Go on Mel, tell him.

Harry, the books are in very good shape.

- That right, Mel? - Take me a week to figure out.

Harry, he's got listed every pay-off to every cop in the last 12 years.

- What? - Whaddya gonna do, you gotta keep records?

- You put down names? - Yeah, Harry.

What are the tax people gonna say?

I wouldn't show those books to anybody.

You've got to..

It's an audit.

- They'll put him in jail. - They will, Harry.

- Mel, you gotta help me. - No thanks.

Leo, talk to him.

They can't put me in jail now,

I'm trying to change my life.

I wanna talk to you.

- Harry? - Get lost.

Harry?

Look, write yourself a cheque for 200 and get out of my life.

May I have your attention please.

The fire department has informed us

that you may now return to your rooms on all floors.

We apologise for the inconvenience and thank you for your cooperation.

- What's going on? - Pyjama party.

Why didn't you tell me she was here? Such a nice girl.

What happened?

- If you wanna know, I had an accident. - You must be outta your head!

Let's go.

- Where's he taking my books? - You'll get 'em back, come on.

Look, all I did was go over his books.

I hardly even know the guy.

I happen to be married to his daughter.

We're just looking for some information, Mr Skolnik.

Sure, go ahead.

All we're trying to find out is

whether someone told Max Ferenger to burn the books.

-Nobody told him. - That's right, nobody.

Well, Ferenger testified that when you were all in some kind of Turkish bath,

he was told to destroy the records.

- Thats'a a lie. - That's not true.

They should put him in the nuthouse.

- Hi. Hey Margie! - Coming.

- She'll be right out, George. - Fine.

- Next Saturday, Bobby. - Okay.

Of course, you realise Mr Plotnick,

you're the one who had something to gain from the fire?

- No I didn't. - Now look,

Ferenger claims he was told to destroy the books,

maybe not in those words but things like,

"You'd be better off without them".

- Did you say that? - The hell I did.

Well somebody did and we think it was you.

- I know who said it. - Who?

- But he didn't mean it. - Who said it?

- It was him, Mel. - What?

Well don't you remember, you said something like that?

- Is it so, Mr Skolnik? - No.

Whatever he said Captain, he didn't tell him to make a fire.

Hi, sorry we're late.

I'm afraid, Mr Skolnik that Ferenger also said it was you.

I don't know what I said anymore.

The day I got mixed up with this guy!

Margie.

You understand, even when nobody's hurt,

arson is a very serious charge?

Did Sidney show?

Listen, they're holding him as a material witness, that's all.

I know what you're thinking, Kay but I didn't do it.

- Hello Ida. - Best thing is you say nothing, Kay.

Now look Ida, don't start that please.

Because if you wanna say something, I got plenty to say.

Excuse me, who are you?

I happen to be the mother.

And I know who you are Mr Crime-maker.

And I know that until he married your daughter,

my son was not once in any trouble.

Mr Skolnik please.

Excuse me Mrs Skolnik, I got a lawyer for you.

Thanks, I got my own lawyer.

She's making a mistake Leo, that's some downtown lawyer.

He don't sneeze for under 300 and he don't know his way around.

That's true Honey.

I don't understand where you got the nerve to show up.

What I do now?

Nothing, except break up a family.

But I tell you something, Harry.

If it's the last thing I do, I'll see you back in jail.

Rodriguez and Romero, with your witnesses please.

Have your fee ready.

Look honey, it's not too late,

you can still call her and tell her.

I'll tell you one thing,

if she ever finds out I was here she'll skin me alive.

The way this is going,

it looks like you two are gonna get just one present

so you better tell me what you want.

- Where is he, Honey? - I'll look.

Daddy?

- You really wanna give us a present? - Sure.

You know those pictures Stevie took of you?

Yeah.

Well he showed them to a magazine.

I'm not allowed to say which.

And they wanna do a story on you.

Nah, I had enough of that stuff.

It's terribly important to us, Harry.

They offered him a job.

Plotnick and Pomerance, with your witnesses please.

Have your fee ready.

Okay Honey, we'll make a deal.

But there's something I want you to do for your mother.

This open heart operation was performed on a Los Angeles woman.

It was money pledged by you during the last Big Heart telethon,

that saved this life and countless others.

I have an announcement.

I know we're here to watch the telethon,

but since you're all our dear friends,

I want you to meet the fiancé of our son,

Miss Millie Plotnick.

They'll be married before going to Africa,

where Steven has an important assignment.

Hello Kay, I told you they'd get married.

I guess you don't know it but I kinda brought them together again.

I don't know what you're talking about.

I got him the job.

I mean he got it on account of me.

Just so you know Harry, I called your parole officer.

- She wouldn't listen to reason. - They can't do nothing.

That isn't what she said.

Honey, you put me back in, it'll kill me.

I doubt it.

I got a bomb in here, I got an enlarged heart.

Hello.

For those of you who want to visit the studio,

Jack says we can come over a few at a time.

A year ago, Jimmy was in this wheelchair.

Your money set him free.

So please, get on that phone.

A now for your pleasure, the rising star of TV and stage,

Gilbert Brooks.

Holding on to a love,

is holding life itself.

Darling, tell yourself,

never to let go.

Holding on to a dream,

is sharing paradise.

My darling, let's think twice

before we awake

from a love like ours,

that goes way beyond the stars,

to a land unknown,

but two lovers...

Holding on with a heart,

is holding on for good.

My love, I'm holding you...

Call an ambulance.

Hello, Harry.

Hello, Mrs Pomerance.

You'll be fine.

I don't think so.

Leo...

call Sidney.

- I better make a Will. - Sure, Harry.

Jack,

I got something for you.

I wanna make a donation.

Anything we can do, Mrs Pomerance?

Maybe you, Rabbi.

Ladies and Gentlemen, a friend of Jack Pomerance, our chairman

has just pledged $5,000 right here in the studio.

Now that's the kinda friend to have.

Where's Kay?

A gambler who hasn't long to live, turns into a benefactor of mankind.

You know every now and then folks, something happens to remind us,

that life isn't just stranger than fiction,

but more beautiful and more real.

This is what he said, he said:

"Give it to the kids, I don't need it where I'm going."

- Just the way I wanted it, Jack. - No, Harry.

Jack, please.

He wants to make it $20,000.

Thanks officer.

Leo, my 60%,

I'm leaving the girls.

That's wonderful, Harry.

- You're off the hook, huh? - Yes, Harry.

Kay, everybody,

I told Max to make the fire,

Mel had nothing to do with it.

I don't know what to say Harry, you've been so "hartsik".

There's some good, Honey, in everybody.

What's he doing here?

Him, I want him out.

Well Mr Plotnick...

Your heart is fine.

- What? - That's right.

Listen, Doc, I got an enlarged heart, I was in St Marys.

We called them, they got nothing on you.

What?

Listen, call them again,

I was in under another name uh...

Schwarz, Shapiro!

Maybe you got the wrong diagnosis.

- You mean I ain't gonna die? - Not if you drive carefully.

When did you last move your bowel?

Well,

I been running around, I can't remember.

They're hard as a rock.

- Hello Harry. - He says I'm okay.

- I can go? - In a while.

What a laugh.

I hear you gave away a lot of money.

- You think I gotta pay? - Harry, you make a big noise on TV

and now you ask me if you gotta pay.

I hear you also took the rap on that arson charge.

I figured I was dying.

You gotta get me off, Sid.

There's two cops out there waiting for a deposition.

I didn't do it!

Who was there when you said it?

Kay, Leo,

some Rabbi... a cop.

- Forget it, forget it. - Sidney!

He's okay.

There he is.

Harry.

Harry?

I hear what you done for me.

That's ok, Max.

Officer,

you want that deposition?

When you're ready.

Hello Kay.

Okay, now I wanna see the whole family up here.

Come on, everybody, come on.

Well Sidney says maybe a year, with time off for good behaviour.

Just remember Harry, when you come out you'll be in the clear

and you'll own half of a very nice business.

All right everybody.

You gonna visit me on Sundays?

A nice smile everybody.