All language subtitles for My 600-lb Life S06E12

Woman #1: I KNOW I'M GETTING
TO A BREAKING POINT,

AND I'M JUST WAITING TO DIE.

[ SIGHS ]

♪♪

AH, GOD.
AH.

Woman #2: MY LIFE IS WASTING
AWAY, AND I HATE IT.

Woman #3: I TRY TO CHANGE, BUT
SOMETHING ALWAYS KNOCKS ME DOWN.

♪♪

♪♪

MY LIFE, IT'S LIKE LIVING
A DEATH SENTENCE.

AH! OH!

OW! [BLEEP]

THIS IS NO LIFE FOR ANYONE.

Woman #4:
OH, JUST PRAY FOR ME.

[ CRYING ]

OW, MY LEG!

-SIT DOWN RIGHT THERE.
-WAIT.

YOU'RE MAKING ME MAD.

ALL RIGHT. THIS IS
COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE.

[ DOOR SLAMS ]

Sarah: I'M ABOUT TO FIND OUT

IF I'VE LOST
MY WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY.

DIDN'T I TELL YOU
IF YOU GAINED WEIGHT,

YOUR SURGERY WOULD BE OFF?

--Captions by VITAC--
www.vitac.com

CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY
DISCOVERY COMMUNICATIONS

♪♪

EXAMINING YOUR LIFE TO SEE
THE WRONG CHOICES

THAT HAVE SLOWLY LED YOU
TO THE LIFE YOU NOW HAVE

CAN FEEL LIKE THE HARDEST THING
YOU'LL EVER DO,

BUT IT'S EVEN HARDER TO START

MAKING THE CHOICES
TO CHANGE THAT.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

THE LIFE THAT I'M LIVING
RIGHT NOW IS MISERABLE,

AND JUST WALKING HURTS BECAUSE
OF ALL THE STRAIN ON MY BODY.

♪♪

MY KNEES HURT. MY BACK HURTS.

MY ANKLES STING.

[ SIGHS ]
EVEN MY SHOULDERS HURT

FROM ALL THE WEIGHT
I'M CARRYING,

AND IT'S GOTTEN TO THE POINT

WHERE IT'S GETTING UNBEARABLE
TO GO UP THE STAIRS.

LIKE, I HAVE TO LITERALLY CRAWL
UP THE STAIRS, LIKE AN ANIMAL.

♪♪

SO I DON'T DO MUCH ANYMORE

EXCEPT TRY TO GET UP
TO STAY CLEAN,

WHICH IS THE ONLY REASON
I GO UPSTAIRS.

♪♪

BUT THE MOST DIFFICULT PART
OF MY MORNING ROUTINE

WOULD BE SHOWERING

BECAUSE MY MOBILITY
IS CHANGING FOR THE WORSE,

AND I CAN'T STAND FOR
LONG PERIODS OF TIME.

MY MOM HAS TO HELP ME
WITH EVERYTHING.

-YOU GOT IT?
-YEAH. I GOT IT.

ABOUT A YEAR AGO,
IT GOT TO THE POINT

I COULDN'T SHOWER BY MYSELF.

I HAD TO HAVE SOMEBODY THERE
DOING IT FOR ME.

AND IT'S EMBARRASSING TO BE
A GROWN ADULT WHO STILL NEEDS

TO BE BATHED BY THEIR MOM,

BUT WHAT'S EVEN WORSE IS,

I KNOW SOON, I WON'T EVEN BE
ABLE TO MAKE IT UP THE STAIRS,

AND AT THAT POINT,
SHE'S GOING TO HAVE TO BATHE ME

ON A TARP IN THE LAWN,

AND I DREAD THAT,
BUT I KNOW THAT I'M MONTHS AWAY

OF IT GETTING THAT BAD
BECAUSE IT'S JUST TOO DIFFICULT

AT THIS POINT.

I AM VERY TIRED
OF LIVING LIKE THIS,

AND I FEEL BAD BECAUSE MY MOM
IS DOING EVERYTHING FOR ME,

AND AT THIS POINT,
I'M JUST TRYING TO SURVIVE

BECAUSE TO CARRY ALL THIS WEIGHT

IS PHYSICALLY

AND EMOTIONALLY EXHAUSTING.

AND I'M IN SO MUCH PAIN
AFTER MY SHOWER,

BUT I'M SCARED
THAT AT SOME POINT,

I'M NOT GOING TO BE
ABLE TO MAKE IT.

I JUST WANT TO GET BACK
TO MY CHAIR AND EAT.

AFTER MY MOM HELPS ME
IN THE SHOWER,

I WANT HER TO GO START
MAKING ME BREAKFAST

BECAUSE I CAN'T WAIT TO EAT.

IF I GET DRESSED
AS FAST AS I CAN,

BUT THEN I HAVE TO TRY
AND MAKE IT BACK DOWNSTAIRS,

AND IT'S THE SCARIEST PART
OF MY DAY BECAUSE I'M TERRIFIED

I'M GOING TO FALL.

♪♪

SO I'M JUST WAITING FOR THE DAY
THE WORST HAPPENS.

IT'S GOING TO BE REALLY BAD
AT THAT POINT.

SO I CAREFULLY TRY
AND MAKE IT DOWN THE STAIRS

BECAUSE ALL I WANT TO DO
IS GET IN MY CHAIR AND EAT.

♪♪

FOOD IS WHAT I'M LIVING FOR,

AND I LITERALLY
CAN'T WAIT TO HAVE MY MOM

BRING ME SOMETHING TO EAT.

I STILL MAKE SARAH'S FOOD.
I MAKE HER PLATE FOR HER.

I KNOW I PUT TOO MUCH FOOD
ON THE PLATE,

BUT IF I DON'T, SHE'LL BADGER ME
UNTIL I PUT MORE ON THERE,

AND I'M NOT EVEN SURE
WHY I DO IT.

I THINK IT'S BECAUSE
I FEEL GUILTY.

FOOD GIVES ME A FEELING
THAT I CAN'T EXPLAIN.

FROM THE MOMENT I WAKE UP,
THAT'S ALL I'M WAITING FOR,

AND FOR A BRIEF MOMENT,
ALL THE PAIN

AND ALL THE MISERY
OF MY LIFE IS GONE,

AND IT'S JOY, EXCITEMENT,
HAPPINESS ALL WRAPPED UP IN ONE.

AND AS MUCH AS I KNOW
THIS IS WHAT'S KILLING ME,

I LITERALLY CAN'T EAT ENOUGH.

Barbara: SO DIFFICULT TO SEE
YOUR CHILD GO THROUGH THIS.

IT TEARS YOUR HEART OUT.

♪♪

I HAD A HARD TIME GETTING
ALL THAT FOOD ON THAT PLATE.

-REALLY?
-YEAH.

WELL, IT WORKED.

Sarah:
FOOD IS EVERYTHING FOR ME.

IT'S MY PURPOSE FOR LIVING,

AND I THINK ABOUT IT
UNTIL I GO TO SLEEP.

AND THE SECOND I WAKE UP,
IT'S ALL I WANT,

AND FOR AS FAR BACK
AS I CAN EVEN REMEMBER,

THAT'S HOW IT'S ALWAYS BEEN.

♪♪

♪♪

MY MOM TELLS ME I WOULD OVEREAT
FROM MY EARLIEST AGE,

AND I THINK IT STARTED
WHEN I WAS AROUND 3.

I HAD THREE SIBLINGS --

AN OLDER BROTHER,
AN OLDER SISTER,

THEN ONE YOUNGER SISTER,

AND I'M THE ONLY BIG ONE.

AND I THINK EATING WAS A WAY
FOR ME TO COPE WITH MY WORLD

BECAUSE MY DAD
HAD A DRINKING PROBLEM

THAT LED TO A LOT OF FIGHTS
BETWEEN HIM AND MY MOM,

AND, SO, SHE DIVORCED HIM.

IT WAS A STRESSFUL TIME
IN MY FAMILY

BECAUSE MY MOM WAS TRYING
TO RAISE FOUR KIDS BEING SINGLE,

AND SHE WAS NOT
FINANCIALLY STABLE,

SO IT WAS A HARD TIME.

AND WE COULDN'T AFFORD A LOT,

SO MY MOM HAD A LIMIT
TO WHAT I COULD EAT,

AND SHE WOULD NEVER LET ME
HAVE MORE THAN A SECOND PLATE,

UNLESS I WAS TO GET UP
AND SNEAK IT REAL QUICK

WHILE
SHE WAS IN THE LIVING ROOM,

SO THAT'S WHAT I STARTED DOING,

AND I WOULD JUST EAT IT ALL
BECAUSE I COULDN'T

GET CAUGHT WITH IT,
AND THE MORE I SNUCK FOOD,

THE BETTER I GOT AT IT.

AND I HIT 200 POUNDS
BY THE TIME I WAS 8.

AND AROUND THAT TIME,
MY MOM STARTED DATING SOMEONE

WHO WOULD BECOME
MY FIRST STEPDAD,

AND WHEN THAT WAS GOING ON,
SHE WAS MORE DISTRACTED,

SO I COULD JUST EAT
WHENEVER I WANTED,

BUT WITH HOW BIG I WAS GETTING,
SHE STARTED TO CATCH ON.

Barbara: I WOULD FIND
WRAPPERS AND DISHES

THAT SHE LEFT BEHIND,

AND THAT'S WHEN I REALIZED
SHE WAS SNEAKING AT NIGHT.

Sarah: BUT AT THAT POINT,
MY MOM DIDN'T TRY TO STOP ME

BECAUSE SHE GOT MARRIED,

AND WE JUST DIDN'T SPEND
ANY TIME TOGETHER.

I FELT AT THAT TIME
THAT I LOST MY MOM,

AND I WANTED HER ALL TO MYSELF,

AND I FELT LIKE

HE CAME IN AND TOOK HER AWAY.

Barbara: SARAH DID NOT GET ALONG
WITH HER STEPDAD AT ALL,

AND THEN I THINK
SHE STARTED EATING MORE

WHEN HE CAME INTO THE PICTURE.

Sarah: BUT TO MAKE MATTERS
WORSE, WHEN HE MOVED IN WITH US,

HE STARTED TO BECOME
EMOTIONALLY ABUSIVE.

HE DID WEIRD, BIZARRE THINGS,

AND I FELT LIKE I WAS
GOING CRAZY,

TRYING TO TELL PEOPLE,

BUT DIDN'T BELIEVE ME.

LIKE, ONE TIME HIM AND MY MOM
GOT INTO AN ARGUMENT,

AND MY MOM LEFT,

AND HE CAME AND SAT DOWN

NEXT TO ME ON THE COUCH

AND PULLED OUT A POCKET KNIFE

AND SLIT FROM HIS ANKLE
TO HIS KNEE

LIKE NOTHING WAS WRONG
WITH THAT.

SO I TOOK ALL THAT LONELINESS
AND PAIN, AND I JUST ATE,

AND I REMEMBER WHEN I WAS 11,
I GOT ON A SCALE,

AND IT SAID
THAT I WEIGHED 345 POUNDS,

AND I COULDN'T BELIEVE IT.

IT WAS UNREAL.

I WASN'T EVEN A TEENAGER,
AND I WAS ALMOST 400 POUNDS,

AND THAT SCARED ME,
BUT NOT ENOUGH TO STOP EATING.

BUT WHEN I WAS 12, I THOUGHT
THINGS WERE GOING TO GET

A LITTLE BETTER BECAUSE MY MOM
AND MY FIRST STEPDAD SPLIT,

AND WHEN MY MOM AND MY STEPDAD
BROKE UP AND HE LEFT,

I FELT REALLY RELIEVED.

BUT THAT RELIEF DIDN'T LAST LONG

BECAUSE MY MOM GOT REMARRIED
TO MY OTHER STEPDAD

WITHIN MONTHS
OF MY FIRST STEPDAD LEAVING.

I FELT ANGRY BECAUSE

I DIDN'T WANT TO GO THROUGH

WHAT I WENT THROUGH
WITH THE FIRST STEPDAD.

IT WAS A FEAR, AND I ALSO

HAD GOTTEN MY MOM BACK
FOR A LITTLE WHILE,

AND NOW...

SHE'S GOT ANOTHER HUSBAND.

BUT IT WAS EVEN WORSE
WITH MY NEW STEPDAD

BECAUSE MY MOM SEEMED TO
FIND GUYS THAT DIDN'T WORK

AND WERE EMOTIONALLY ABUSIVE.

HER NEW HUSBAND WAS WORSE
THAN THE LAST ONE.

I WAS SO DEPRESSED
AT THAT POINT,

I JUST DIDN'T STOP EATING,

AND I GAINED ANOTHER
100 POUNDS IN 3 MONTHS.

I JUST FELT SO ALONE,

AND FOOD WAS THE ONLY THING
THAT MADE ME FEEL BETTER.

I TRIED TALKING TO MY MOM,
AND SHE NEVER REALLY LISTENED,

BUT MY MOM KNEW HOW THE STEPDADS
TREATED ME, TO AN EXTENT.

A LOT OF IT WAS MY SAY,

AND I DON'T THINK
SHE WANTED TO BELIEVE ME,

BUT SHE COULDN'T
IGNORE IT FOREVER

BECAUSE IT ALL EVENTUALLY
WOULD GET SO BAD,

IT WOULD JUST BLOW UP,

AND THAT HAPPENED WHEN I WAS 16.

I WAS GETTING READY
TO GO TO SCHOOL,

BUT I WASN'T GETTING
DRESSED FAST ENOUGH,

SO MY STEPDAD TOLD ME
TO JUST WEAR MY NIGHTGOWN,

AND I SAID, "NO."

AND ALL OF A SUDDEN,
HE HELD ME DOWN ON THE BED,

AND HE WAS PUSHING ME
AND SHAKING ME,

AND HE WAS JUST SO ANGRY,

AND MY BROTHER KEEGAN ENDED UP
COMING UPSTAIRS

AND, LIKE,
PUSHING HIM OFF OF ME,

AND THE COPS CAME
AND EVERYTHING,

AND HE HAD RIPPED MY SHIRT
OFF, LIKE, HALFWAY OFF,

AND I WAS CALLING FOR MY MOM,
AND SHE WOULDN'T COME.

AND I WAS SO SCARED,
BUT SHE DID NOTHING,

AND THAT'S WHAT HURT THE MOST,
THAT I WASN'T IMPORTANT ENOUGH,

OR MY MOM DIDN'T CARE ENOUGH
TO EVEN TRY AND PROTECT ME.

♪♪

SO I WANTED TO LEAVE,

AND I DROPPED OUT OF
HIGH SCHOOL MY SENIOR YEAR.

I MOVED OUT OF THE HOUSE
AND AWAY FROM MY STEPDAD,

BUT AFTER THAT, MY MOM
AND MY STEPDAD SPLIT UP.

I GOT A JOB WORKING
AT A FAST-FOOD RESTAURANT,

BUT THAT DIDN'T LAST LONG

BECAUSE I WAS 18
AND CLOSE TO 450 POUNDS,

SO I JUST PHYSICALLY
COULDN'T DO IT.

I WAS STILL EATING AND GAINING,

SO IT DIDN'T TAKE ME LONG
TO REACH 500 POUNDS.

WHEN I HIT THAT WEIGHT,

THAT'S WHEN I STARTED HAVING
TROUBLE TAKING CARE OF MYSELF,

AND I HAD TO MOVE BACK IN
WITH MY MOM AND MY SISTER.

BUT RIGHT AFTER I MOVED BACK IN,

MY MOTHER CONFESSED TO ME
SOMETHING SHE'S BEEN

DEALING WITH
SINCE WE WERE CHILDREN.

SHE SAID SHE'S BEEN BATTLING
DRUG ADDICTION FOR 16 YEARS.

WHEN WE WERE YOUNGER,
IT WAS VICODIN,

AND THEN IT GREW FROM THERE
TO WHERE NOW,

SHE WAS STRUGGLING WITH HEROIN,

AND THAT PUT ME...

[ Voice breaking ]
IN A STATE OF SHOCK AT FIRST.

BUT THE REASON MY MOM
WAS TELLING ME THIS WAS THAT

SHE SAID SHE WAS DONE
AND SHE WAS LEAVING IN 2 HOURS

FOR A REHAB FACILITY.

SO, MY MOM WAS AT
THE CLINIC FOR SIX MONTHS,

AND THEN SHE CAME BACK CLEAN,

AND SHE'S STAYED THAT WAY
FOR ALMOST 2 YEARS NOW.

BUT I KEPT GAINING.

AND WHEN I WAS 23,

MY WEIGHT SKYROCKETED
INTO THE 600s.

AND NOW MY MOM HAS TO DO
ALMOST EVERYTHING FOR ME,

AND I'M NOT SURE
WHAT MY WEIGHT IS NOW.

I JUST KNOW I'M AT A POINT
WHERE I CAN'T GO ON LIKE THIS.

♪♪

-ARE YOU HUNGRY?
-STARVING.

THERE IS NEVER A MOMENT
I DON'T WANT TO EAT.

I SIT HERE UNTIL I GET IT,

AND THAT'S PRETTY MUCH
WHAT MY MOM DOES FOR ME ALL DAY.

AND IF MY FAMILY OR ANYONE
TRIES TO GET ME TO STOP,

I GET VERY UPSET.

THEN IT MAKES IT WORSE,
AND I WANT TO EAT EVEN MORE.

♪♪

I JUST CRAVE EVERYTHING
ALL DAY LONG.

♪♪

AND AS SOON AS ONE MEAL IS DONE,

I NEED A SNACK.

THEN IT'S TIME FOR ANOTHER MEAL.

SO MY EATING NEVER STOPS.

IT NEVER EVEN SLOWS DOWN.

SARAH HAS TO HAVE SNACK CAKES,
COOKIES, ICE CREAM,

THINGS OF THAT NATURE,
ALWAYS SOMETHING WITH SUGAR,

THINGS THAT ARE NOT
GOOD FOR HER.

JUST -- IT SEEMS LIKE
THE WORSE IT IS FOR HER,

THE MORE SHE LIKES IT.

♪♪

♪♪

Barbara:
WANT ANYTHING ELSE?

Sarah:
I NEED SOMETHING SALTY.

I DON'T CARE WHAT IT IS.

Sarah: I KNOW I'M GETTING
TO A BREAKING POINT.

I CAN FEEL MY BODY
GETTING WORSE,

AND TO A POINT WHERE SOON,

I'M NOT GOING TO BE
ABLE TO GO ON,

AND I KNOW WHAT'S
GOING TO HAPPEN.

I'M GOING TO GO
TO SLEEP ONE NIGHT

AND I'M NOT GOING TO WAKE UP,

SO I HAVE TO FIND A WAY
TO STOP THAT FROM HAPPENING.

BUT I'M SCARED I CAN'T,
AND THAT NO MATTER WHAT,

I'M STILL GOING TO END UP
DYING IN THIS CHAIR

BECAUSE I ATE MYSELF TO DEATH.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

I SET AN APPOINTMENT TO SEE
DR. NOWZARADAN TOMORROW,

AND I'M PACKING
FOR THE TRIP RIGHT NOW,

BUT IT'S A LITTLE DIFFICULT
BECAUSE I HAVE TO HAVE MY MOM

BRING ME EVERYTHING TO CHOOSE
WHAT I WANT TO TAKE.

DO YOU HAVE EVERYTHING?

[ SIGHS ] YEAH, I THINK.
WILL YOU HELP ME CLOSE IT?

Barbara: I'M CONCERNED ABOUT
SARAH GOING TO HOUSTON,

BUT SHE NEEDS TO CHANGE
HER LIFE COMPLETELY,

SO I'M REALLY HOPING
THAT THIS WORKS FOR HER

BECAUSE I DON'T THINK SHE'LL
BE ABLE TO LOSE THE WEIGHT

ON HER OWN, SO WE'RE ALL
ANXIOUS TO GET THIS GOING.

Barbara:
IS THAT EVERYTHING?

ALL RIGHT. I'M PACKED.

ALL RIGHT. WELL, HOW DO
YOU FEEL ABOUT THE TRIP?

EXCITED.

ARE YOU?
MM-HMM.

I'M EXCITED FOR YOU.

I'M NERVOUS TO GET ON
THE PLANE, THOUGH, BUT...

YOU'LL BE FINE.
THERE'S NOTHING TO IT.

YEAH.

I HAVEN'T GONE ON A TRIP IN
I DON'T KNOW HOW MANY YEARS,

AND I HAVE NEVER BEEN
ON AN AIRPLANE BEFORE.

I'M JUST NERVOUS ABOUT HOW
MY BODY IS GOING TO HANDLE IT,

AND SO I'M JUST REALLY
HOPING IT ALL GOES WELL,

AND THAT IT'S WORTH
GOING THROUGH ALL THIS.

-HEY.
-HEY.

-HEY.
-BIG DAY?

YEAH.

BUT THANKFULLY, I DON'T
HAVE TO GO BY MYSELF

BECAUSE MY OLDER SISTER HEATHER
IS FLYING DOWN TO HOUSTON

WITH ME TO HELP ME GET THERE,

AND I KNOW I WOULDN'T BE ABLE
TO MAKE THIS TRIP ON MY OWN.

I'D PROBABLY JUST INSTANTLY
HAVE A PANIC ATTACK

BEING IN PUBLIC ALONE,

SO I'M THANKFUL
SHE'LL DO THIS FOR ME.

WE'RE BOTH GOING TO BE
GOING DOWN THERE TOGETHER,

BUT IT IS TEMPORARILY
PUTTING MY LIFE ON HOLD,

BUT IT'S NECESSARY BECAUSE
IF SARAH DOESN'T DO THIS,

THIS MIGHT BE HER LAST CHANCE,

AND SHE'S NOT GOING
TO HAVE A REAL LIFE

IF SHE DOESN'T LOSE WEIGHT,

SO IT'S SOMETHING
I'M WILLING TO DO.

♪♪

Sarah: I KNOW THIS IS A BIG
SACRIFICE FOR HER,

TAKING TIME AWAY FROM HER LIFE
TO DO THIS FOR ME,

BUT WHAT'S EVEN BIGGER IS,

THAT I TOLD HER IF DR. NOW
ACCEPTS ME INTO HIS PROGRAM,

AND I GET SURGERY,

HE NEEDS YOU TO STAY IN HOUSTON
FOR A YEAR AFTER THE OPERATION

BECAUSE HE SAYS THE FOLLOW-UP

IS MORE IMPORTANT THAN
THE ACTUAL SURGERY,

AND YOU HAVE TO HAVE
SOME SUPPORT WITH YOU.

SO IF HE APPROVES ME
FOR SURGERY,

THEN MY SISTER HAS AGREED
TO MOVE DOWN TO HOUSTON WITH ME,

AND THAT'S HUGE.

♪♪

♪♪

Barbara:
I'M WORRIED ABOUT HOW SARAH
IS GOING TO DO AT THE AIRPORT.

SHE'S NEVER EXPERIENCED
ANYTHING LIKE THIS BEFORE,

BUT I'M PROUD OF SARAH
FOR TAKING THIS STEP.

FOR A LONG TIME, SHE WOULDN'T
DO ANYTHING TO HELP HERSELF,

SO I HOPE THIS TRIP
TO TEXAS GOES WELL.

WE'RE HERE.

♪♪

SO MUCH IS RIDING ON THIS,

AND MY WHOLE FAMILY
IS SACRIFICING SO MUCH

TO HELP ME DO THIS.

-ALL RIGHT.
-HEATHER, CAN YOU GET THAT?

LOVE YOU.

Sarah: SO I DON'T WANT
TO LET EVERYONE DOWN.

AND I'M SO SCARED RIGHT NOW.

I DON'T LIKE TO GO OUT IN PUBLIC
BECAUSE EVERYBODY STARES AT ME,

AND I FEEL LIKE THEY'RE ALL
JUDGING ME CONSTANTLY,

SO I JUST NEED TO GET THROUGH
ALL THIS AS FAST AS POSSIBLE.

DO YOU HAVE YOUR I.D.?
HAVE IT HANDY.

♪♪

HI.

Heather:
SARAH HAS NEVER FLOWN BEFORE.

THIS IS SOMETHING
THAT'S GOING TO BE

A TOTALLY NEW
EXPERIENCE FOR HER,

AND I KNOW THAT SHE HAS
A LOT OF ANXIETY

ABOUT ACTUALLY
GETTING ON THE PLANE,

FITTING THROUGH THE AISLE,

SO WE BOTH HAVE
SOME ANXIETY ABOUT THAT,

BUT SHE'S GOING
TO DO IT ANYWAY

BECAUSE GETTING TO HOUSTON

IS VERY, VERY IMPORTANT
FOR HER HEALTH,

SO WE'RE GOING TO
MAKE IT HAPPEN.

THAT MIGHT BE WHY THERE'S
AN EXTRA SEAT BOOKED.

-YES.
-OKAY.

WE'LL BE SITTING DOWN
SOON ENOUGH.

ARE YOU STARTING TO BE, LIKE,
IN PAIN, LIKE, FOR REAL,

OR JUST DISCOMFORT?

OKAY, GOOD.

I DON'T KNOW. SARAH?

I'M NOT SURE IF
I CAN PUSH YOU.

Woman:
WHEN YOU GET UP TO THE GATE,

I'LL HAVE THEM REPRINTED
FOR YOU.

HERE'S YOUR I.D.,
SWEETHEART.

-YES.
-OKAY.

YOU'RE DEFINITELY GOING
TO BE ABLE TO PREBOARD.

THANK YOU.

Sarah: THIS IS HUMILIATING.

WE'LL BE UP THERE.

AND I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH
FURTHER I CAN MAKE IT.

WHEN I'VE PUSHED MY BODY
TOO HARD IN THE PAST,

AND I HIT MY LIMIT,

IT'S NOT LIKE I CAN REST A BIT
AND RECOVER.

I'M DONE FOR THE DAY.

USE THIS.

SO I'M SCARED RIGHT NOW THAT
I'M NOT GOING TO MAKE IT.

ALL RIGHT.

[ SIGHS ]

OH.

OKAY.
GET A LITTLE BREAK.

GO UP ONE.
I NEED TO LEAN.

GO UP.
DON'T KNOCK ME DOWN.

DON'T KNOCK ME DOWN.

[BLEEP]

ARE YOU OKAY?

I DON'T LIKE HEIGHTS.

[ SIGHS ] OKAY.

WHERE IS IT?

Heather: IT'S THAT WAY.

I'M NOT DOING WELL.

I'M TRYING NOT
TO GET OVERWHELMED

AND MAKE IT THERE
WITHOUT PASSING OUT.

-HI.
-HELLO.

HI. DO YOU NEED
OUR BOARDING PASSES?

AND WE'RE SUPPOSED
TO BE PREBOARDING.

OKAY.

-OKAY.
-OKAY.

PERFECT. OKAY.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.

WHERE IS IT?

♪♪

THANK GOODNESS THEY'RE BOARDING.

RIGHT NOW, MY BIGGEST WORRY
IS GETTING ON THE PLANE

BECAUSE I'M AFRAID
THAT MAYBE I WON'T BE ABLE

TO FIT THROUGH THE AISLES
AND THE SEATS WELL,

AND PEOPLE IS GOING
TO BE STARING AT ME.

♪♪

♪♪

THANK GOODNESS.

♪♪

I'M MISERABLE, AND I JUST
WANT TO GET TO HOUSTON,

BUT I JUST HAVE TO MAKE IT
FOR THE NEXT 5 HOURS

AND THEN GET TO THE HOTEL
AND TRY AND REST.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

WE MADE IT, AND I'M IN
SO MUCH PAIN,

AND IT FEELS LIKE
I HAVEN'T EATEN IN FOREVER.

THIS TRIP HAS JUST ABOUT
PUSHED ME TO MY LIMIT,

BUT I'M NOT REGRETTING IT.

I JUST NEED SOMETHING
TO CALM ME DOWN

AND HELP ME DEAL
WITH THIS WHOLE DAY

BECAUSE MY NERVES ARE FRAZZLED.

♪♪

Heather: SARAH, YOU JUST YELL
ACROSS WHAT YOU WANT TO ORDER.

-OKAY.
-I DON'T WANT TO TALK.

CAN I GET A NUMBER ONE
WITH A MEDIUM FRY?

-AN ADDITIONAL?
-YEAH.

-AND THAT'S IT?
-YES, PLEASE.

-$8.75, FIRST WINDOW.
-OKAY. THANK YOU.

HE WAS VERY SHOCKED THAT
YOU WANTED A SECOND FRY.

ALL RIGHT.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

I KNOW JUNK FOOD
ISN'T THE BEST OPTION.

♪♪

♪♪

IT'S GOING TO BE A LONG NIGHT,

SO I JUST WANT THIS STAY
AND THIS TRIP TO BE OVER WITH.

ALL RIGHT.

BUT I'M HOPING TOMORROW, THIS
ALL TURNS OUT TO BE WORTH IT.

AND I CAN'T SLEEP IN THE BED

BECAUSE MY WEIGHT WILL STOP ME
FROM BREATHING IF I LAY DOWN.

WE'RE HERE.

I JUST HOPE I'M ABLE TO DO
WHAT I NEED TO GET HELP,

AND THAT I DON'T DO SOMETHING
TO MESS THIS ALL UP

AND LOSE THE ONLY CHANCE
I HAVE TO SAVE MY LIFE.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

Sarah: WE'RE HEADED TO MY FIRST
APPOINTMENT WITH DR. NOW,

AND MY EMOTIONS
ARE ALL OVER THE PLACE

BECAUSE WHAT HAPPENS TODAY

IS GOING TO DETERMINE
MY WHOLE LIFE,

AND IT'S SCARY NOT
KNOWING WHAT TO EXPECT.

♪♪

AND I DON'T WANT TO KNOW
WHERE MY WEIGHT IS AT NOW,

BUT I'M HERE TO TRY
AND CHANGE MY LIFE.

SARAH NEELEY?

Sarah: I KNOW IT'S THE ONLY
OPTION I HAVE LEFT,

SO WHATEVER IT TAKES TODAY,
I HAVE TO DO IT.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

SEEING THAT NUMBER
IS HUMILIATING,

ESPECIALLY WITH MY SISTER HERE.

I HAVE TO DO SOMETHING
ABOUT MY WEIGHT,

AND I NEED TO DO IT, LIKE, NOW.

SO I JUST HOPE I'M ABOUT
TO GET THE HELP I NEED.

[ KNOCKS ON DOOR ]

-HELLO.
-HI.

HOW ARE Y'ALL DOING?

GOOD.

I'M DR. NOWZARADAN.

I'M SARAH.

NICE TO MEET YOU, SARAH.
AND YOU ARE?

I'M SARAH'S SISTER.

SISTER?
YEAH.

FOR A SISTER, YOU TWO
LOOK QUITE DIFFERENT.

-YEAH.
-ALL RIGHT.

SARAH, YOU ARE 642 POUNDS,

AND YOU'RE ONLY 25 YEARS OLD.YES.

AT THIS RATE,
YOU'LL BE 800 POUNDS

BY THE TIME YOU ARE 30,

AND I SEE, ACCORDING
TO YOUR CHART,

YOU ARE ON
A BLOOD-PRESSURE MEDICATION

AND SOME INHALER
AND SOME ANTI-INFLAMMATORIES.

YES.WELL, THESE ARE MEDICINE

WE USUALLY ONLY SEE PEOPLE
IN 40s AND 50s, NOT 20s.

YEAH.

SO IF YOU HAVE A BODY
OF SOMEONE TWICE YOUR AGE,

NOW IN YOUR 20s,
YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS.

YOU'RE NOT GOING TO BE ABLE
TO SURVIVE MUCH INTO YOUR 30s,

AND IT SAYS IN YOUR CHART,
YOU'RE ALSO HAVING TROUBLE

GETTING AROUND
AND STAYING MOBILE,

SO NOW IT'S A TIME
TO TURN THINGS AROUND,

NOT WHEN IT'S TOO LATE.

OKAY.

SO YOU NEED TO MAKE
COMPLETE CHANGE OF LIFESTYLE,

STARTING WITH YOUR
EATING HABITS.

OKAY.

TELL ME, HOW DO YOU THINK
YOU GOT TO THIS POINT?

MY MEALS.

LIKE, I'LL, LIKE,
COOK A CASSEROLE,

AND I'LL EAT, LIKE,
A LOT OF THAT CASSEROLE,

LIKE, THROUGHOUT THE DAY.

BUT NO SNACKING?

LIKE, I DO SNACK, I GUESS,
BUT I EAT A LOT OF FOOD,

AND I CAN'T STOP.

WELL, WHO BRINGS YOU
ALL THIS FOOD?

MY MOM.

SO WHY ISN'T SHE HERE?

SHE COULDN'T MAKE THE TRIP.

I SEE. WELL, YOUR DYNAMIC
WITH YOUR MOM

IS GOING TO BE PART
OF THIS CHANGE, TOO,

AND THAT HAS TO START NOW.

-OKAY?
-OKAY.

WHAT ABOUT YOUR ACTIVITY?

WELL, I WAS GOING FOR WALKS,

AND THEN I STARTED
GETTING SICK WITH MY C.O.P.D.,

AND THAT KIND OF PUT
A STALL ON THINGS,

BUT I WALK.

OKAY. WITH C.O.P.D.,
YOU HAVE INFLAMED LUNGS,

AND THAT'S GOING TO BE
AN ISSUE THAT CAN PREVENT YOU

FROM HAVING SURGERY IF WE DON'T
GET THEM TO A HEALTHIER PLACE.

SO WE NEED TO START WITH
GETTING YOUR WEIGHT DOWN.

SO WE'LL GIVE YOU
SOME EXERCISES,

AND THAT'S GOING
TO BE A BIG FACTOR

TO GET YOU TO A HEALTHIER
PLACE TO HAVE SURGERY,

AND THEN I WANT YOU TO LOSE

AT LEAST 30 POUNDS
IN ONE MONTH, OKAY?

SO YOU'RE GOING TO NEED
TO FOLLOW A 1,200-CALORIE-A-DAY,

HIGH-PROTEIN, LOW-CARB DIET,
THAT I WILL GIVE YOU TODAY.

-OKAY.
-OKAY?

AND YOU'RE GOING TO NEED TO
FOLLOW IT, AND NO MORE SNACKING.

-GOT IT?
-YES.

GREAT, AND IF YOU DO THAT
AND YOUR LUNGS ARE OKAY,

THEN I'LL APPROVE YOU
FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY,

BUT THEN YOU'RE GOING TO
NEED TO MOVE TO HOUSTON

IF YOU WANT TO BE
PART OF THIS PROGRAM,

AND YOU WILL NEED SOMEONE
WITH YOU TO SUPPORT YOU,

AND THAT'S GOING
TO BE YOUR SISTER?

YEP.

WE'RE WORKING ON IT.

OKAY.
WE'LL SEE YOU IN A MONTH

AND HOPEFULLY
30 POUNDS LIGHTER.

OKAY.

-ALL RIGHT.
-OKAY.

NICE TO MEET YOU, SARAH.

-NICE TO MEET YOU.
-NICE TO MEET YOU.

-AND NICE TO MEET YOU, TOO.
-THANK YOU.

ALL RIGHT.
WE'LL SEE Y'ALL LATER.

-OKAY.
-OKAY.

SARAH IS AT A CROSSROADS
RIGHT NOW.

SHE CAN EITHER DO
WHAT SHE NEEDS NOW

OR THINGS ARE ABOUT TO GET
MUCH WORSE FOR HER VERY FAST.

BUT SHE'S GOING TO HAVE
TO CHANGE

THE WHOLE DYNAMIC OF HER LIFE
TO DO THIS,

SO THIS WON'T BE EASY,

BUT SHE HAS TO DO IT

IF SHE WANTS TO TURN
HER LIFE AROUND.

♪♪

Sarah:
IT'S A HUGE RELIEF TO KNOW
DR. NOW IS GOING TO HELP ME,

BUT I FEEL OVERWHELMED...

I'M NOT GOING TO BE ABLE
TO GET IN THAT CAR.

WE'LL MOVE IT.

...BECAUSE NOT ONLY TO I NEED
TO LOSE 30 POUNDS IN A MONTH,

I HAVE TO START DOING
THESE EXERCISES

TO GET MY LUNGS
IN BETTER SHAPE

BECAUSE I CAN'T BLOW THIS
CHANCE AND MESS THIS UP.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

IT'S BEEN A BIT OF A HARD MONTH.

WHEN I GOT BACK HOME
AFTER SEEING DR. NOW,

I HAD A FALLING OUT
WITH MY SISTER.

I HAD JUST STARTED TO DIET,

BUT SHE FELT I WASN'T
TRYING HARD ENOUGH,

SO SHE SAID SHE WASN'T GOING
TO MOVE TO HOUSTON WITH ME,

AND THAT WAS DEVASTATING.

THINGS GOT PRETTY HEATED
BETWEEN ALL OF US,

AND MY MOM SIDED WITH ME

AND TOLD HEATHER
IT WASN'T RIGHT TO DO THIS

AND MESS UP MY CHANCES
TO GET SURGERY.

SO WE ALL DECIDED WE NEEDED
SOME TIME APART,

AND MY MOM AND ME CAME
TO STAY AT MY GRANDMOTHER'S,

WHO LIVES A COUPLE HOURS
AWAY FROM US

SO I CAN FOCUS AND DO WHAT
I NEED TO MAKE PROGRESS

WITHOUT GETTING DISTRACTED
BY ALL THE DRAMA.

♪♪

Maryann:
I FIXED YOU SOME JELL-O.

YOU KNOW, THAT DOESN'T
HAVE ANY CALORIES.

IT'S THE SUGAR-FREE,

SO THAT'LL GIVE YOU A LITTLE BIT
OF SOMETHING SWEET TO EAT.

LIVING WITH MY GRANDMA
IS CHALLENGING,

AS SHE'S CONSTANTLY WATCHING
WHAT I PUT ON MY FOOD

AND WHAT KIND OF
FOOD I'M EATING.

I AM EATING MOSTLY
LEAN MEATS AND VEGETABLES,

BUT MY GRANDMA KNOWS
A LOT ABOUT WEIGHT LOSS.

SHE'S EVEN BEEN HELPING ME
WITH MY EXERCISES.

HOW DO YOU THINK THE DIET
HAS BEEN GOING?

I THINK IT'S GOING GOOD,
BUT IT'S TOUGH.

SO YOU FEEL
PRETTY SATISFIED?

YEAH. I FEEL LIKE
I'M DOING A GOOD JOB.

YEAH.
I THINK YOU ARE.

I THINK MY GRANDMA THINKS
I CAN LOSE THE WEIGHT,

BUT SHE'S WORRIED THAT MAYBE
I'M NOT GOING TO

TRY AS HARD AS I SHOULD

BECAUSE THERE'S A FEAR
IN THE BACK OF HER MIND.

ARE YOU READY?

YEAH.

LET'S DO IT.

I'M STILL NERVOUS ABOUT
SEEING THE DOCTOR AGAIN.

I WASN'T ABLE TO MAKE IT
TO MY LAST APPOINTMENT,

SO I CALLED AND ASKED IF I
COULD HAVE A LITTLE MORE TIME.

HE ASKED ME WHAT WAS GOING ON,
AND I TOLD HIM,

AND HE'S CONCERNED
ABOUT MY LACK OF SUPPORT

IF I MOVE TO HOUSTON,

AND HE TOLD ME
I COULD WAIT ANOTHER MONTH,

BUT THAT I NEED TO LOSE
ANOTHER 30 POUNDS

TO SHOW HIM I AM
STAYING ON TRACK.

SO I SHOULD BE DOWN 60 POUNDS
WHEN I COME BACK,

AND I'M NOT SURE
WHAT TO DO RIGHT NOW

BECAUSE IF MY SISTER
WON'T MOVE WITH ME,

THEN THE ONLY OTHER
OPTION IS MY MOM,

AND I DON'T KNOW IF SHE CAN.

SEE?
YOU'RE GETTING BETTER, THERE.

♪♪

THESE PAST FEW WEEKS HAVE BEEN
MORE OF A STRUGGLE FOR ME.

I JUST FEEL LIKE I'M UNDER
A LOT OF PRESSURE RIGHT NOW

TO FIGURE SO MUCH OUT,
AND WHAT CALMS ME DOWN IS FOOD.

SO I KNOW I'VE GIVEN IN A FEW
TIMES, BUT I TALKED TO MY MOM,

AND SHE WASN'T TOO HAPPY
AT THE IDEA

OF MOVING DOWN THERE
WITH ME FOR A YEAR,

BUT SHE AGREED.

-GOT YOUR STUFF?
-YEAH. I THINK SO.

I MIGHT HAVE
A FEW THINGS LEFT.

I GUESS I SHOULD GO AHEAD
AND START PUTTING EVERYTHING

IN THE CAR.

I FEEL LIKE A BURDEN
BECAUSE I KNOW THAT MY MOM

REALLY DOESN'T WANT TO GO,

BUT SHE'S GOING
BECAUSE SHE KNOWS

THIS IS GOING TO SAVE MY LIFE.

I HAVE MY NEXT APPOINTMENT
WITH DR. NOW IN A WEEK,

BUT I'M NOT GOING
BY PLANE AGAIN.

THE LAST TIME WAS TOO
UNPLEASANT,

SO ME AND MY MOM ARE DRIVING,

AND I'M NERVOUS BECAUSE
IT'S GOING TO BE A LONG DRIVE.

Barbara: HEATHER PUT ME IN
A PRETTY AWKWARD SITUATION

BECAUSE I REALLY
DID NOT WANT TO GO.

I'VE NEVER BEEN IN A CAR WITH
SARAH FOR MORE THAN 3 HOURS,

AND THIS IS ABOUT
A 16-HOUR DRIVE.

I DON'T KNOW HOW
WELL ME AND SARAH

ARE GOING TO GET ALONG
COOPED UP IN A CAR FOR 2 DAYS,

BUT IF I SAID NO,
I WOULD BE A SELFISH MOM,

AND I THINK IF SOMETHING'S NOT
DONE TO CHANGE HER LIFESTYLE,

THAT SHE WON'T LIVE
ANOTHER FIVE YEARS.

♪♪

Sarah: I'M JUST
NOT LOOKING FORWARD TO THIS.

I JUST HOPE I CAN MAKE IT.

Barbara: MY CAR
IS ABOUT 20 YEARS OLD,

AND THE PASSENGER-SIDE DOOR
WILL NOT OPEN,

SO SARAH HAS TO GET IN
THROUGH THE DRIVER'S SIDE

AND SLIDE ALL THE WAY OVER,

WHICH IS REALLY
DIFFICULT FOR HER.

Sarah: THESE SEAT BELT THINGS
ARE IN THE WAY.

I KNOW.

YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE
TO CLIMB OVER THEM.

OKAY. I'M TRYING.

[ GRUNTING ]

[ CHUCKLES ] MOM!

GOD!

Maryann: YOU COULD BREAK
THAT STEERING WHEEL!

OKAY.

THIS IS HUMILIATING.

LOVE YOU.

Barbara: WILL YOU GET MY CANDY
OFF THE DASHBOARD?

-CAN'T REALLY REACH IT.
-THEY'RE A DISTRACTION.

♪♪

Sarah: WITH HOW HARD THIS IS
ON ME GOING BACK AND FORTH

ON ALL THESE TRIPS,

MY MOM AND ME PLAN TO STAY
DOWN THERE THIS TIME,

AND WE FOUND A PLACE TO STAY,
BUT WE BOTH HAVEN'T SEEN IT,

SO WE DON'T KNOW
WHAT TO EXPECT,

AND RIGHT NOW,

I'M JUST NOT LOOKING FORWARD
TO THIS WHOLE TRIP.

♪♪

DON'T START BITCHING
ABOUT MY DRIVING ALREADY.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

YOU'RE MAKING ME NERVOUS.
CAN I DRIVE?

NO.

I'M DRIVING.

WELL, YOU'RE NOT DOING
A REALLY GOOD JOB AT IT.

WELL, THE SUN IS
RIGHT IN MY EYES.

LOOK AT THE ROAD!

I CAN'T SEE ANYTHING.

THAT'S IT.
LET ME DRIVE.

SARAH, STOP.
YOU'RE MAKING ME NERVOUS.

-JUST STOP.
-HOW AM I MAKING YOU NERVOUS?

A LOT OF THE TENSION IN
MY RELATIONSHIP WITH MY MOM

HAS LED TO A LOT
OF ME EATING IN THE PAST,

SO BEING WITH HER MAKES
MY STRUGGLES WITH CRAVING

AND EATING MUCH, MUCH WORSE.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

Sarah: IT'S BEEN TWO LONG DAYS
ON THE ROAD,

AND I THINK ME AND MY MOM
ARE BOTH READY TO BE THERE

AND GET OUT OF THIS CAR
AND AWAY FROM EACH OTHER

FOR A LITTLE BIT.

Barbara:
IT'S RIGHT OVER THERE.

SARAH, STOP.

-WHERE?
-OVER THERE.

Sarah: OKAY, WHERE IS,
"OVER THERE," MOTHER?

I'M GOING TO IT,
AND YOU KEEP TELLING --

LOOK TO YOUR RIGHT.

[ SIGHS ] [BLEEP]

-IT'S RIGHT DOWN THERE.
-YOU MEAN MY LEFT?

GOD, I SAW IT.

I DIDN'T KNOW YOU SAW IT.
YOU DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING.

Barbara: I DON'T THINK I WAS
THE BEST CHOICE

TO COME DOWN HERE
AND LIVE WITH SARAH FOR A YEAR.

WE'RE TRYING TO GET ALONG SINCE
WE'RE IN SUCH CLOSE QUARTERS,

AND WE'RE GOING TO BE TOGETHER
FOR THE NEXT YEAR, AT LEAST,

BUT WE HAVE OUR MOMENTS,

AND SHE TAKES ALL OF HER ANGER
AND FRUSTRATION OUT ON ME.

SHE ALWAYS HAS.

♪♪

Sarah: THANK GOD WE'RE HERE.

I JUST WANT TO GET
TO OUR APARTMENT AND REST.

DO THEY FEEL
STURDY ENOUGH?

YEAH.

WHY ARE THEY SHAKING?
[BLEEP]

THEY'RE FINE.

[ PANTING ]

I AM EXHAUSTED.

I'M ALREADY COMPLETELY
OUT OF BREATH.

MY KNEES HURT. MY BACK HURTS.

MY ANKLES,
EVERYTHING KIND OF ACHES.

BUT AT THIS POINT, I JUST NEED
TO GET IN A COMFY CHAIR

LIKE THE ONE I HAD AT HOME
AND REST.

ME AND MY MOM
WENT ONLINE LAST WEEK

AND BOUGHT SOME FROM A FURNITURE
STORE HERE IN HOUSTON,

TO HAVE THEM DELIVERED
WHEN WE ARRIVED,

BUT THEY'RE STILL NOT HERE YET.

OKAY, SO,
I GUESS I CALL THEM.

[ Ringing ]

This is Robert.

HEY, THIS IS SARAH.

WE ARE READY
FOR THE FURNITURE.

162.

160-- okay.

162, YEAH.

♪♪

THANK GOD THEY'RE HERE

BECAUSE I JUST NEED TO SIT DOWN.

WHERE ARE WE
GOING TO PUT IT?

WE'LL HAVE TO PUT THEM
OVER THERE.

Sarah: I JUST NEED TO REST
AND GET MY STRENGTH BACK,

AND I'M HOPING
THIS ALL ISN'T FOR NOTHING,

BECAUSE IF I CAN'T GET
WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY SOON,

THEN MY MOM SAYS
WE'RE GOING BACK.

-THANK YOU.
-NO PROBLEM.

♪♪

I HAVE THREE DAYS UNTIL I SEE
DR. NOW FOR MY NEXT APPOINTMENT,

AND I HAVE TO TRY AND STICK
WITH MY DIET UNTIL THEN,

BUT THE TRIP DOWN MADE
IT HARD NOT TO EAT FAST FOOD,

SO I KNOW I NEED TO WORK HARD
TO UNDO THE LAST COUPLE OF DAYS.

WHERE DO YOU WANT
TO PUT EVERYTHING?

I DON'T KNOW.

WE'LL FIGURE IT OUT.

I'M GOING TO GO AHEAD AND START
BRINGING EVERYTHING UP.

OKAY.

HONESTLY, I DON'T THINK
IT BOTHERS SARAH

THAT I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING.

I DON'T THINK IT
BOTHERS HER AT ALL.

SARAH HAS BEEN DEPENDENT
ON ME HER WHOLE LIFE.

I'M KIND OF USED TO IT,

BUT IT'S STILL
A LITTLE ANNOYING SOMETIMES

BECAUSE SHE CAN'T HELP ME
DO ANYTHING.

I HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING.

BUT SARAH'S THE ONLY ONE
THAT CAN LOSE THE WEIGHT.

NOBODY CAN DO IT FOR HER.

SHE HAS TO CHANGE HER LIFESTYLE,
AND SHE HAS TO WORK REALLY HARD,

AND SHE HAS TO BE THE ONE
TO DO IT, YOU KNOW?

IF I COULD DO IT FOR HER,
I WOULD HAVE DONE IT ALREADY.

♪♪

Sarah: I'M SCARED ABOUT
WHAT'S GOING TO HAPPEN

AND THAT EITHER DR. NOW
WILL GIVE UP ON ME

OR MY MOM WILL BECAUSE I KNOW
SHE'S ALREADY READY TO GO BACK.

ALL WE'VE DONE IS FIGHT
THE WHOLE WAY HERE,

AND NEITHER OF US
ARE LOOKING FORWARD

TO BEING HERE TOGETHER
FOR A YEAR,

BUT THIS IS WHAT I NEED,

AND I KNOW IT'S ALL RIDING
ON MY WEIGH-IN IN A FEW DAYS.

♪♪

[ SIGHS ] WOW.

Barbara: IT'S NOT A GOOD SIGN
THAT WE JUST GOT TO HOUSTON,

I'M ALREADY FINDING BAGS
OF CANDY AND COOKIES.

EVERYBODY IS BENDING OVER
BACKWARDS TO HELP HER OUT.

SHE NEEDS TO DO HER PART.

LOOK WHAT I JUST FOUND.

YES. I GOT THAT LAST NIGHT
AT THE HOTEL

BECAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW --

LIKE, FOUR, FIVE BAGS OF CANDY
AND TWO BAGS OF COOKIES.

BECAUSE I DIDN'T KNOW HOW LONG
WE WOULDN'T HAVE FOOD HERE.

YOU KNEW WE WERE GOING
TO THE STORE TODAY.

AND YOU KNOW YOU'RE GOING
TO EAT MOST OF THAT ANYWAYS.

YOU DIDN'T TELL ME
YOU HAD ALL THIS.

I TOLD YOU I GOT
SNACKS LAST NIGHT.

NO. YOU DIDN'T.

YES, I DID.

WELL, I'M JUST GOING TO
THROW IT AWAY.

NO YOU WON'T.
YOU'LL KEEP IT IN YOUR DRAWER.

NO. I WILL. I AM.

OKAY. THAT'S A LIE.

SARAH COMPLETELY IGNORES
EVERYTHING I SAY TO HER,

OR SHE ARGUES,

OR SHE'LL SAY SOME NASTY COMMENT
AND THEN DO WHAT SHE WANTS.

I GUESS, TO HELP SARAH,

I'M GOING TO HAVE TO PROBABLY
CHANGE EVERYTHING

ABOUT THE WAY I EAT, ALSO,
BECAUSE I DON'T THINK

I CAN EAT THE WAY I DO
AND SARAH NOT BE TEMPTED,

BUT I THINK SHE NEEDS TO TAKE IT
WAY MORE SERIOUSLY THAN SHE DOES

BECAUSE IF SHE DOESN'T,
SHE'S GOING TO FAIL.

♪♪

♪♪

Sarah: I'M HEADED TO SEE DR. NOW
FOR MY FOLLOW-UP APPOINTMENT,

AND I'M EXTREMELY NERVOUS.

SO MUCH IS RIDING ON THIS,

AND I JUST KNOW WITH ALL THE
TENSION BETWEEN ME AND MY MOM

AND HOW HARD IT IS
FOR HER TO BE DOWN HERE

THAT SHE'S NOT GOING TO STAY
IF I'M NOT DOING THIS.

SO I'M REALLY HOPING
THIS WEIGH-IN ISN'T BAD

AND THAT I CAN GET
WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY TODAY.

SARAH NEELEY?

BUT I NEED TO BE AT
OR BELOW 582,

AND I REALLY HOPE
I'M AT LEAST CLOSE TO THAT.

♪♪

♪♪

THAT'S DISAPPOINTING,

AND I'M GUESSING THIS
APPOINTMENT IS PROBABLY

NOT GOING TO GO WELL.

I JUST HOPE I DIDN'T MESS
THIS ALL UP.

-HELLO.
-HI.

HOW ARE YOU DOING?

-GOOD.
-AND WHO IS THIS?

-THIS IS MY MOM.
-NICE TO MEET YOU. I'M BARB.

NICE TO MEET YOU.

SO YOU TOOK TWO MONTHS
TO GET BACK HERE...

YES.

...AND NOT ONLY DID YOU MISS
YOUR 60-POUND WEIGHT-LOSS GOAL,

BUT YOU GAINED 11 POUNDS,
AND THAT'S...

-NO. I KNOW. I MESSED UP.
-...SIGNIFICANT.

SO WHAT HAPPENED?

WE'VE BEEN EATING OUT A LOT.

YOU KNOW, BECAUSE WE'VE,
YOU KNOW,

BEEN TRAVELING THESE
LAST FEW DAYS, BUT...

YOU KNOW THAT'S NO EXCUSE,

AND THAT HASN'T BEEN
THE CASE IN PAST TWO MONTHS.

YOU JUST MOVED DOWN HERE.

I KNOW.

BUT I'M ALSO CONCERNED
ABOUT THAT

BECAUSE INSTEAD
OF BRINGING YOUR SISTER,

YOU BROUGHT YOUR ENABLER.

WHAT HAPPENED
TO YOUR SISTER?

SHE DIDN'T THINK I WAS
TRYING HARD ENOUGH.

SHE FREAKED OUT AND DIDN'T
WANT TO COME ANYMORE,

SO NOW MY MOM IS WITH ME.

SO NOW MOM IS GOING
TO KEEP YOU ON TRACK?

YES.

BECAUSE,
ACCORDING TO SARAH,

THAT HAS NOT BEEN
THE CASE IN THE PAST.

YOU'RE THE ONE WHO
BRINGS HER THE FOOD,

SO YOU'RE GOING TO HELP HER
TO LOSE WEIGHT NOW?

I'M GOING TO TRY
TO HELP HER.

Y'ALL GOING TO COOK AT HOME,
OR ARE YOU GOING TO EAT OUT?

WE'RE GOING TO COOK
AT HOME.

OKAY, I'M GONNA GIVE YOU
A COPY OF THE DIET, TOO,

AND I WANT YOU TO LEARN IT,

AND I WANT TO ENCOURAGE
BOTH OF YOU TO GO ON IT,

BUT AT A MINIMUM,
YOU NEED TO HELP SARAH

STICK WITH IT
WITH WHAT YOU PREPARE.

IF YOU DON'T,
YOU'RE GOING TO BE

BURYING YOUR DAUGHTER
IN NEAR FUTURE.

DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT?

YEAH, DEFINITELY.

YOU TWO NEED TO CHANGE
YOUR DYNAMIC NOW.

SO TO MAKE SURE
THAT'S HAPPENING,

I'M SENDING YOU BOTH
TO START PSYCHOTHERAPY

TOGETHER IMMEDIATELY...

-OKAY.
-...SO WE CAN ADDRESS THIS

BEFORE YOUR SITUATION
GETS WORSE.

SARAH, DO YOU REMEMBER
HOW SERIOUS YOUR SITUATION IS?

YOU'RE 25, BUT YOU GOT
THE DISEASES OF PEOPLE

IN 40s AND 50s.

MM-HMM.

SO YOUR LIFE SPAN IS
NOT VERY LONG RIGHT NOW.

YEAH.

SO YOU NEED TO GET
CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE,

AND YOU NEED TO
MOTIVATE YOURSELF.

YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE
TO MAKE SOME DECISIONS,

AND YOU'VE GOT TO BE
RESPONSIBLE FOR ALL THE CHOICES

YOU'RE MAKING.
YOU UNDERSTAND ME?

-OKAY.
-SO I'M GOING TO GIVE YOU

TWO MONTHS AGAIN, AND I WANT
YOU TO LOSE 60 POUNDS.

IF YOU STICK WITH
THE 1,200-CALORIE,

YOU CAN EASILY DO THAT,
OKAY?

AND YOU NEED TO DO
YOUR EXERCISES,

SOME AEROBIC, UPPER-BODY,
AND THEN WALKING

AT LEAST 20,
30 MINUTES TWICE A DAY.

YOU THINK YOU CAN MAKE
ALL THOSE CHANGES?

YES. I CAN.

THAT'S GOOD, BECAUSE
YOU HAVE TO DO THIS.

I'M GOING TO LOSE THE WEIGHT.

ALL RIGHT. I'LL SEE YOU BOTH
IN A COUPLE OF MONTHS.

SOUNDS GOOD.

IF YOU HAVE ANY
QUESTIONS, CALL ME.

-I'LL SEE YOU LATER.
-THANK YOU.

-NICE TO MEET YOU.
-THANK YOU, YOU TOO.

ALL RIGHT.

SARAH IS NOT TAKING
HER SITUATION SERIOUSLY,

AND A LOT NEEDS TO HAPPEN
FOR HER TO GET ON TRACK,

BUT THE FACT THAT
SHE'S MAKING EXCUSES

MAKES ME CONCERNED
THAT SHE'S EXPECTING

AN EASY FIX TO HER SITUATION.

SO IF SHE DOESN'T START
TAKING THE RESPONSIBILITY

FOR HER OWN CHOICES
AND HER ACTIONS,

THEN SHE'S PLAYING WITH
AN OUTCOME SHE MAY NOT SURVIVE.

♪♪

♪♪

Sarah: RIGHT NOW, MY MOM AND ME
ARE GOING TO SEE A THERAPIST

TOGETHER BECAUSE DR. NOW WANTS
US TO START TO TALK ABOUT THINGS

AND WORK TO HAVE
A HEALTHIER DYNAMIC,

BUT ME AND MY MOM HAVE
NEVER REALLY TALKED ABOUT

ANY OF THE ISSUES OR PAST
BETWEEN US.

AND THERE'S SO MUCH
FROM MY CHILDHOOD

THAT I DON'T KNOW
WHERE TO EVEN START,

BUT I'M WILLING TO GIVE THIS
ALL A TRY AND SEE HOW IT GOES.

-HEY, THERE.
-HI.

HI. WHY DON'T YOU
COME ON BACK?

OKAY.

[ SIGHS ]

I THOUGHT MAYBE WE COULD
START WITH YOU

JUST SHARING WITH ME
A LITTLE BIT ABOUT

YOUR EARLY EXPERIENCES
AND THE ROLE OF FOOD

AND HOW THAT PLAYED
INTO YOUR LIFE

WHEN YOU WERE YOUNGER.

FOOD WAS A BIG, BIG THING
FOR ME IN MY LIFE RIGHT THEN.

MM-HMM.

BECAUSE MY MOM HAD JUST
GOTTEN MARRIED TO THIS GUY,

AND HE WAS WEIRD,

AND I DIDN'T LIKE
HOW MY MOM WAS,

LIKE, GIVING HIM ATTENTION...

-OH, OKAY.
-...AND, LIKE, NOT ME.

I DIDN'T WANT TO SHARE HER.

SO YOU FOUND YOURSELF FINDING
A LOT OF COMFORT IN FOOD?

YEAH. YEAH.

YEAH.

WELL, A LOT OF TIMES
FOOD CAN BECOME A WAY

THAT WE JUST DEAL
WITH OUR ENVIRONMENT,

AND ESPECIALLY AS A CHILD,

IT'S A LEARNED WAY
OF COPING OR RESPONDING

TO WHAT WAS GOING ON
AT THAT TIME FOR YOU

THAT WAS STRESSFUL.

SO THINGS CHANGED?

HE WAS THERE UNTIL
I WAS ABOUT 12.

-WOW, OKAY.
-YEAH.

LITERALLY RIGHT AFTER HE LEFT,
HER THIRD HUSBAND MOVES IN.

-OH.
-YEAH, SO IT WAS FREAKY.

NO TIME WITH MOM?

NO, CRAZY.
MM-HMM.

SO TELL ME ABOUT YOUR
EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.

HE WAS JUST AS BAD
AS MY FIRST STEPDAD.

THE WORST INCIDENT
WAS ONE TIME HE SAID

THAT I'D HAVE TO WEAR
MY NIGHTGOWN TO SCHOOL,

AND IT ENDED UP WITH HIM
ON TOP OF ME, HOLDING ME DOWN.

HE, LIKE, RIPPED MY SHIRT,

AND I WAS SCREAMING
FOR MY MOM.

MY MOM WAS LITERALLY, LIKE,
IN THE NEXT ROOM...

WOW.

...JUST SCREAMING FOR MY MOM.

SHE DIDN'T COME.

[ SNIFFLING ]

I JUST CAN'T BELIEVE
SHE DIDN'T COME FOR ME

WHEN I WAS SCREAMING
HER NAME.

YEAH.

THAT'S ALWAYS BUGGED ME.

I DON'T THINK I'LL EVER
FORGIVE MY MOM FOR WHAT...

-YEAH.
-...SHE PUT US ALL THROUGH.

I DON'T THINK I CAN
FORGIVE HER.

SO HOW HAVE YOU
RECONCILED THAT?

I MEAN, YOU'RE LIVING
WITH MOM NOW.

YEAH. I MEAN, LIKE,
WE'VE GOTTEN INTO ARGUMENTS,

AND I'VE THROWN IT
UP IN HER FACE,

AND THEN AFTER I DO IT,
I FEEL SO BAD ABOUT IT.

SO YOU DON'T REALLY GET WHAT
YOU'RE LOOKING FOR, THEN?

BUT IT'S GOING TO
CONTINUE TO COME OUT,

AND MAYBE
IT DOESN'T COME OUT.

MAYBE YOU KEEP IT INSIDE,
AND IT'S ALL PART OF THAT.

"THIS IS WHY I GO TO FOOD."

AND THE REALITY IS,

THERE'S A LOT OF THINGS THAT
ARE COMING UP IN THE PRESENT,

AND IT'S TRIGGERING
THE PAST.

-YEAH.
-MOM IS HERE TODAY.

-MM-HMM.
-SO LET'S BRING HER IN.

OKAY.

HEY. LOOK. WOULD YOU BE WILLING
TO JOIN US IN YOUR SESSION?

-OH, SURE.
-OKAY.

-HI.
-HEY. HOW'S IT GOING?

WELL, THANK YOU, MOM,
FOR JOINING US.

WE WERE JUST TALKING ABOUT
LIFE AND FAMILY EXPERIENCES,

AND THERE WERE SEVERAL
EXPERIENCES THAT SHE HAD

THAT IT MAY BENEFIT HER
TO HAVE VALIDATION FROM YOU.

SO, SARAH, WE HAD TALKED
ABOUT JUST YOUR EXPERIENCE

OF HAVING DIFFERENT MEN
IN AND OUT OF YOUR LIFE

AND WANTING MOM TO BETTER
UNDERSTAND ASPECTS OF THAT.

I GUESS THAT I FELT
LIKE YOU THINK

THAT I DESTROYED
BOTH RELATIONSHIPS.

NO.
I'VE NEVER THOUGHT THAT.

THAT NEVER EVEN
CROSSED MY MIND.

DO YOU ADMIT TO SEEING
THINGS THAT THEY DID

AND NOT SAYING
ANYTHING ABOUT THEM?

YES, BUT I'VE NEVER
CONSIDERED EVEN FOR A SECOND

THAT YOU HAD ANYTHING
TO DO WITH IT.

BUT I'VE ALWAYS WONDERED
WHY YOU NEVER DID ANYTHING?

ABOUT WHAT?

LIKE THE TIME HE ATTACKED ME
AND I WAS SCREAMING FOR YOU,

AND YOU NEVER CAME.

YOU WERE LITERALLY, LIKE,
RIGHT NEXT DOOR.

I DON'T REMEMBER THAT.

IT HAPPENED.

I DON'T HAVE ANY MEMORY
OF THAT WHATSOEVER.

MM-HMM.

LET'S ASSUME
THAT IT DID HAPPEN

AND THAT WAS
HER PERSPECTIVE.

WHAT DO YOU WANT HER TO
KNOW ABOUT HOW YOU FEEL,

AND WHAT DO YOU THINK SHE
WAS GOING THROUGH

AS SHE WAS EXPERIENCING
ALL THAT?

I'M SURE SHE WAS PROBABLY UPSET
AND SCARED, AND I'M SORRY.

YOU LOOK LIKE YOU'RE A LITTLE
UPSET THAT MOM DOESN'T REMEMBER.

YEAH.
I'M NOT EXAGGERATING.

I'M NOT SAYING IT DIDN'T.
I'M NOT CALLING YOU A LIAR.

I'M JUST SAYING,
I DON'T REMEMBER,

AND IF I WAS THERE
AND DIDN'T DO ANYTHING,

I'M SORRY,
BUT I DON'T REMEMBER.

SO YOU WOULD HAVE LIKED
TO THINK THAT YOU

WOULD HAVE RESPONDED
IF YOU...

WELL, I'D LIKE
TO THINK SO, YEAH.

-YEAH.
-YEAH.

I'VE ALWAYS LOVED YOU.
I THOUGHT YOU KNEW THAT.

YEAH, AND WE'VE ALWAYS
HAD A ROCKY RELATIONSHIP,

BUT I'VE ALWAYS BEEN
OBSESSED WITH HER, TOO.

OBSESSED IN TERMS
OF JUST WANTING HER

TO BE CLOSE TO YOU...
-YEAH.

...AND HAVE A CLOSE
RELATIONSHIP?

YEAH, I GUESS.
YEAH.

-LIKE...
-YEAH, WHICH IS REALLY NORMAL,

ESPECIALLY IF YOU FELT LIKE YOU
DIDN'T HAVE THAT AS A CHILD.

WHAT'S PROBABLY HAPPENED,

WHICH IS REALLY NORMAL
IN SITUATIONS

WHERE THERE'S BEEN
JUST A LOT OF TRAUMA

AND ATTACHMENT ISSUES
IS THAT, YEAH,

WE WENT FROM YOU NOT FEELING
ATTACHED AT ALL TO MOM

TO NOW IT'S ALL MOM,
ABOUT MOM.

"I HAVE MOM IN MY LIFE,
AND, MOM, WHERE YOU GOING?

WHO YOU WITH? WHAT TIME
YOU GOING TO BE HOME?"

-MM-HMM.
-"I NEED THIS FROM YOU.

I NEED THAT FROM YOU."
AND SO, YOU KNOW, TO BE HONEST,

WHERE WE WOULD WANT TO
MOVE TO A HEALTHY PLACE

IS FOR YOU TO BE ABLE,
MOM, TO BE OF SUPPORT

AND TO STILL BE MOM
AND TO STILL BE PRESENT,

BUT TO MOVE AWAY, A LITTLE BIT,
FROM THAT PLACE

OF RESPONDING
ALL THE TIME TO THAT,

ESPECIALLY IF IT'S
NOT IN HEALTHY WAYS,

AND ESPECIALLY IN THIS
WEIGHT-LOSS JOURNEY.

IT'S,
"HOW CAN I BE OF SUPPORT?

BUT I DON'T WANT TO ENABLE YOU
IN THINGS THAT AREN'T HEALTHY."

YEAH. I WOULD LIKE TO
BECOME LESS...

DEPENDENT.

OKAY, BECAUSE WHAT
I'M LOOKING FOR

IS FOR YOU ALL TO FEEL LOVE
AND SUPPORTED BY ONE ANOTHER

IN HEALTHIER WAYS
SO THAT YOU CAN STILL

STAY ATTACHED AND CONNECTED,

BUT YET, BOTH HAVE
YOUR INDEPENDENT LIVES,

AND YOU TOUCH IN A WAY

THAT YOU BOTH AGREE UPON
THAT'S HEALTHY.

-OKAY.
-OKAY.

WELL, I LOOK FORWARD
TO SEEING YOU GUYS AGAIN.

-YES, DEFINITELY.
-YEAH.

Sarah: I'M A LITTLE SHOCKED THAT
MY MOM DOESN'T EVEN REMEMBER

THE MOST PAINFUL MEMORY I HAVE,

AND I DON'T KNOW
WHAT TO DO WITH THAT.

THERE IS JUST A LOT
OF DAMAGE FROM THE PAST

THAT'S BEEN EATING AWAY
AT ME FOR SO LONG,

AND IF FIXING ALL THAT IS
EVEN POSSIBLE AT THIS POINT,

IT'S NOT GOING
TO BE EASY AT ALL,

BUT FOR RIGHT NOW,
I KNOW I HAVE TO LEARN

TO START BEING MORE INDEPENDENT

AND DOING THINGS ON MY OWN.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

THIS PAST MONTH,
I'VE BEEN TRYING TO DO

WHAT THE THERAPIST TOLD ME TO DO

AND START DOING
THINGS ON MY OWN,

AND THE BIGGEST THING
I'VE STARTED DOING IS COOKING.

I'VE BEEN COOKING HIGH-PROTEIN
FOODS AND STICKING TO MY DIET,

AND I FEEL LIKE I'M LOSING
WEIGHT AND I'M ABLE TO DO MORE.

♪♪

ARE YOU HUNGRY?

NO, NOT REALLY,
BUT I'LL SIT WITH YOU.

Barbara: SARAH HAS MADE A HUGE
CHANGE, AND I THINK IT'S GREAT.

I'M GLAD TO SEE HER
FINALLY STICKING TO SOMETHING.

SARAH DOESN'T NEED NEARLY
AS MUCH HELP AS SHE USED TO.

SHE DOES HER OWN COOKING.

SHE WASHES HER OWN DISHES,

AND I DON'T REALLY HAVE
TO DO MUCH OF ANYTHING

LIKE THAT FOR HER RIGHT NOW.

I HAVE A COUPLE THINGS
I NEED TO WASH.

DO YOU WANT ME TO WASH
ANYTHING OF YOURS?

YOU CAN WASH
MY WORK UNIFORMS.

Sarah: THINGS HAVE BEEN A LITTLE
BETTER BETWEEN ME AND MY MOM.

IT'S BEEN A LITTLE AWKWARD
AT TIMES,

BUT WE'RE GETTING PAST IT,
AND MY TAKING CARE OF MYSELF,

IT'S A COMPLETE CHANGE
IN OUR WHOLE RELATIONSHIP,

SO WE BOTH KNOW
IT'S GOING TO BE A PROCESS

AS WE CONTINUE TO WORK
THROUGH THINGS...

ALL RIGHT.
SO YOUR WORK UNIFORM?

...BECAUSE WE BOTH WANT THINGS
TO BE BETTER BETWEEN US,

BUT WE KNOW WE STILL HAVE
A LOT OF WORK TO DO.

♪♪

IT HASN'T BEEN EASY,
BUT I'M WORKING REALLY HARD NOW.

I'M GETTING UP AND WALKING
AROUND MORE THAN THE 30 MINUTES

A DAY THE DOCTOR WANTED.

♪♪

I AM JUST GOING AROUND
OUR APARTMENT COMPLEX,

AND THE LAUNDRY
IS DOWNSTAIRS,

SO IT FORCES ME
TO GET SOME EXERCISE,

BUT I'M AMAZED
AT HOW MUCH EASIER

IT'S BEEN TO GO UP
AND DOWN THE STAIRS,

AND AS OUT OF BREATH
AS I AM SOMETIMES...

♪♪

I FEEL REALLY GOOD RIGHT NOW.

I SEE DR. NOW
IN A COUPLE OF WEEKS,

AND I'M WORKING
REALLY HARD TO MAKE SURE

I HIT MY GOAL THIS TIME.

I KNOW I'M PROBABLY NOT GETTING
ANOTHER CHANCE AFTER THIS,

SO I'M TAKING IT SERIOUSLY AND
DOING ALL THAT I CAN TO MAKE IT.

♪♪

♪♪

ME AND MY MOM ARE GOING
TO SEE DR. NOW

FOR MY THIRD APPOINTMENT,

AND I'M MORE NERVOUS THAN EVER.

I KNOW I'M DOING BETTER

THAN ALL THE PREVIOUS TIMES
I'VE COME IN,

BUT TO LOSE 60 POUNDS IS A LOT,

SO MY ONLY FEAR IS THAT
IT'S NOT GOING TO BE ENOUGH,

AND I'VE WORKED
AS HARD AS I CAN.

SO I'M SCARED IF I DON'T
MAKE IT THIS TIME,

THEN IT MAY MEAN THE HELP I NEED

IS ALREADY OUT OF MY REACH

BECAUSE I'M JUST TOO FAR GONE
AND I JUST DON'T KNOW IT YET.

♪♪

♪♪

Sarah: I'M AT DR. NOW'S
FOR MY THIRD APPOINTMENT,

AND HE SAID I NEEDED TO LOSE
60 POUNDS TO BE BELOW 593 TODAY,

AND I KNOW THAT THIS
MAY BE MY LAST CHANCE.

♪♪

AHH, YES.

-YAY.
-YAY.

-THAT'S GREAT.
-YEAH.

I'M SO EXCITED
AND PROUD OF MYSELF.

PART OF ME WASN'T SURE
THAT IT WAS EVEN POSSIBLE FOR ME

TO LOSE THAT AMOUNT OF WEIGHT,

SO TO SEE ALL MY HARD WORK PAY
OFF IS A REALLY GOOD FEELING,

AND I REALLY HOPE I'M ABOUT
TO GET MY APPROVAL.

[ KNOCKS ON DOOR ]

-HELLO.
-HI.

-HI.
-HOW ARE Y'ALL DOING?

-GOOD.
-GOOD.

ALL RIGHT.
SO YOU'RE DOWN TO 589, HUH?

-YES.
-YOU LOST 64 POUNDS.

-THAT'S GREAT.
-THANK YOU.

YOU'RE IN 500s RIGHT NOW.
SO DO YOU FEEL A LOT BETTER?

I DO.

HAVE YOU BEEN DOING
YOUR BREATHING EXERCISES?

-YES.
-AND YOU TWO MUST BE

WORKING ON FIXING
YOUR DYSFUNCTIONAL DYNAMIC.

OKAY. SO WE'LL RUN
SOME TESTS

AND MAKE SURE EVERYTHING
LOOKS GOOD,

AND IF IT IS, I'M APPROVING YOU
FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY.

-OKAY.
-OKAY?

OKAY.

SO WE'LL GET YOU SCHEDULED
FOR NEXT WEEK.

-OKAY.
-BUT IN THE MEANTIME,

DON'T LET YOUR GUARD DOWN
AND START EATING AGAIN

BECAUSE IF YOU SHOW UP
FOR SURGERY

AND YOUR WEIGHT LOSS HAS
SLOWED DOWN OR YOU GAIN,

THEN I'LL CANCEL IT.
OKAY?

-OKAY.
-OKAY.

SO STICK TO YOUR DIET
AND DO YOUR EXERCISE,

AS WELL AS YOUR
BREATHING EXERCISES,

AND I'LL SEE YOU
BOTH IN A WEEK.

-OKAY. THANK YOU.
-ALL RIGHT.

NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN.

-NICE TO SEE YOU.
-ALL RIGHT.

ALL RIGHT.
WE'LL SEE YOU THEN.

I AM VERY HAPPY TO SEE
THE PROGRESS SARAH HAS MADE.

SHE HAS SHOWN ME THAT SHE'S
WILLING TO STOP MAKING EXCUSES

AND THAT SHE CAN WORK HARD,

BUT WE STILL HAVE A LONG
WAY TO GO WITH HER,

AND THERE IS LIKELY
A LOT MORE ISSUES

BETWEEN HER AND HER MOM
THAT WE NEED TO ADDRESS,

BUT FOR NOW WITH HER WEIGHT
GOING IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION,

I THINK SHE'S READY
TO TAKE THIS NEXT STEP.

I'M SO EXCITED RIGHT NOW,
BUT I'M ALSO FEELING ANXIOUS

KNOWING I HAVE A BIG
OPERATION COMING,

SO I'M JUST GOING TO BE A BUNDLE
OF NERVES UNTIL I GET IT DONE,

BUT I KNOW I NEED TO STAY
FOCUSED LIKE DR. NOW SAID.

I'VE WORKED SO HARD TO GET HERE,

AND I DON'T WANT
TO MESS IT UP NOW.

♪♪

♪♪

AT MY LAST APPOINTMENT,

DR. NOW APPROVED ME
FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY

IF I PASSED MY MEDICAL TEST,

AND I WENT FOR THOSE, AND I
JUST FOUND OUT I'M ALL CLEARED.

AND I'M SO EXCITED,
BUT I'M STILL NERVOUS, TOO,

BECAUSE I HAVE MY SURGERY
COMING UP IN 5 DAYS,

BUT I KNOW THAT AFTER
WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY,

I'M NOT GOING TO BE ABLE TO
PHYSICALLY HANDLE SOME FOODS,

AND I'M WORRIED I'M NOT
GOING TO BE ABLE TO EAT

MY FAVORITE MEAL
AFTER THE SURGERY,

WHICH IS TATER-TOT CASSEROLE,

AND I'VE BEEN THINKING
THAT I'VE EARNED THE RIGHT

TO CELEBRATE JUST A LITTLE.

TATER-TOT CASSEROLE
IS TATER TOTS, CHEESE,

CREAM OF CHICKEN SOUP

AND A BUNCH OF OTHER STUFF
THROWN TOGETHER,

AND IT'S JUST REALLY GOOD.

I THINK THAT I WILL BE ABLE
TO MAKE THIS TATER-TOT CASSEROLE

AND BE ABLE TO ENJOY
A LITTLE BIT OF IT

AND HAVE IT ONE LAST
TIME BEFORE SURGERY

BECAUSE THIS IS A FOOD
THAT I KNOW

I WILL NOT BE ABLE
TO EAT PROBABLY EVER AGAIN.

♪♪

I THINK THAT SINCE I'VE BEEN
APPROVED FOR SURGERY

AND I'VE LEARNED HOW
TO CONTROL MY EATING

THAT I DON'T THINK A LITTLE
BIT OF IT WILL HURT ME.

♪♪

♪♪

BUT I'M GOING TO
REALLY ENJOY THIS.

♪♪

♪♪

I DON'T REALLY KNOW WHY
I'M SO OBSESSED WITH THIS DISH.

I'VE BEEN OBSESSED WITH IT
SINCE I WAS 12 YEARS OLD.

LIKE, I ALWAYS WANTED
MY MOM TO MAKE IT.

LIKE, EVERY DAY,
I WOULD ASK FOR IT,

BUT WHEN SHE WOULD MAKE IT,
I WOULD GET SO HAPPY.

TO ME, IT'S AMAZING --

THE TEXTURE, THE TASTE,
THE SMELL.

♪♪

I GET REALLY EXCITED,
AND I JUST...

I'M EATING IT, AND I'M JUST
HAPPY WHEN I'M EATING IT.

♪♪

♪♪

IT REALLY COMFORTS ME,
FOR SOME REASON.

SO I KNOW THIS IS THE MEAL
I'M GOING TO MISS THE MOST.

♪♪

♪♪

AFTER EATING THE CASSEROLE,
I'VE JUST FELT SO SICK.

I WAS SO FULL.

I JUST STARTED EATING,
AND I THOUGHT I COULD HANDLE IT,

BUT I KNOW I OVERATE,

AND I KEPT DOING IT
FOR THE PAST COUPLE OF DAYS,

BUT I DON'T REALLY KNOW
WHAT CAME OVER ME.

IT'S LIKE I WAS TEMPORARILY
INSANE OR SOMETHING,

AND I FINALLY REALIZED
HOW MUCH I WAS OVEREATING.

I STARTED FREAKING OUT
AND DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO,

SO I CALLED DR. NOW
AND TOLD HIM I MESSED UP,

SO HE SAID HE WANTED ME
TO COME TO HIS OFFICE

TO SEE IF I'VE GAINED WEIGHT.

SO I'M SCARED OUT
OF MY MIND RIGHT NOW

BECAUSE I'M TERRIFIED
I'VE LOST MY SURGERY

AND THAT I LITERALLY JUST MADE
THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

I'M ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIED
RIGHT NOW

BECAUSE I'M ABOUT TO FIND OUT IF
I LOST MY WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY.

♪♪

Barbara:
SARAH IS FEELING VERY NERVOUS

BECAUSE SHE CHEATED
ON HER DIET A COUPLE OF TIMES,

AND EVEN IF SHE DIDN'T
GAIN ANY WEIGHT,

I'M SURE SHE DIDN'T
LOSE ANY EITHER,

SO I REALLY DON'T THINK
THIS APPOINTMENT

IS GOING TO GO
VERY WELL AT ALL.

SARAH NEELEY?

Sarah: I JUST WANT
TO GET THIS OVER WITH.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

I'M SO SCARED RIGHT NOW

DR. NOW IS GOING TO TELL ME
THIS IS ALL OVER.

♪♪

[ KNOCKS ON DOOR ]

ALL RIGHT, SARAH.

SO YOU GAINED 14 POUNDS
IN JUST A FEW DAYS,

AND YOU'RE BACK UP
OVER 600 POUNDS AGAIN.

SO TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED.

I ATE SOME THINGS THIS WEEK
I SHOULDN'T HAVE EATEN.

AND WHY IS THAT?

I JUST LOST CONTROL.

DIDN'T I TELL YOU IF YOU DIDN'T
LOSE OR YOU GAINED WEIGHT,

YOUR SURGERY WOULD BE OFF?

YEAH.

WELL, AT LEAST YOU DIDN'T
TRY TO HIDE IT FROM ME.

YOU WERE HONEST WITH ME,

WHICH SHOWS PROGRESS
WITH YOUR PATHOLOGY.

SO THIS IS WHAT I WILL DO.

YOUR SURGERY WAS SCHEDULED
FOR A FEW DAYS FROM NOW.

I'M NOT GOING TO CANCEL IT,

BUT I'M GOING TO RESCHEDULE IT
FOR A MONTH FROM NOW.

OKAY.

AND WHEN YOU SHOW UP
FOR YOUR SURGERY,

I WANT YOU TO HAVE
LOST ANOTHER 40 POUNDS.

OKAY.

WE WILL WEIGH YOU WHEN
YOU GET TO THE HOSPITAL,

AND IF YOU HIT THIS GOAL,

WE WILL MOVE AHEAD
WITH THE SURGERY.

IF YOU DON'T, WE WILL
SEND YOU BACK HOME.

SOUND FAIR?

-YEAH.
-OKAY.

THIS IS YOUR SECOND CHANCE.

YOU CAN EITHER
PICK YOURSELF UP AND DO THIS,

OR LOSE THIS CHANCE.

-OKAY.
-OKAY.

YOU CAN DO THIS, SARAH.

I'LL SEE YOU LATER.

IT'S DISAPPOINTING TO SEE SARAH
MAKE THE CHOICES SHE HAS MADE,

ESPECIALLY RIGHT AFTER APPROVAL,

BUT MOST PEOPLE
WOULD TRY TO HIDE IT

UNTIL THE DAY OF THE SURGERY.

SHE WAS AT LEAST HONEST WITH ME,

AND I CAN WORK WITH THAT,

BUT THIS IS HER FINAL CHANCE.

♪♪

Sarah: I'M DISAPPOINTED,
BUT MOSTLY IN MYSELF,

BUT I'M ALSO RELIEVED DR. NOW
IS GIVING ME A SECOND CHANCE,

BUT LOST 40 POUNDS IN ONE MONTH
SEEMS DAUNTING.

I THOUGHT I WORKED MY HARDEST
WHEN I MET THE LAST GOAL,

BUT IF THIS IS THE CHALLENGE
DR. NOW IS GIVING ME,

THEN IT MEANS I CAN DO IT.

SO NO MATTER HOW IMPOSSIBLE
IT FEELS, I HAVE TO DO BETTER,

BECAUSE I CAN'T ALLOW MYSELF
TO FAIL AT THIS.

♪♪

♪♪

SINCE SEEING THE DOCTOR
A COUPLE WEEKS AGO,

I'VE GOTTEN RID OF ANY
BAD FOOD IN THE HOUSE,

SO THE ONLY OPTIONS
ARE HEALTHY FOOD

BECAUSE I DON'T WANT
TO TAKE ANY RISKS,

BUT I CAN'T DELUDE
MYSELF INTO THINKING

I'M AS STRONG AS I THINK
I AM RIGHT NOW.

SO I CAN'T BE
AROUND ANY BAD FOOD,

AND I'M MAKING SURE
I KNOW HOW MUCH IS IN EVERY BITE

I TAKE RIGHT NOW.

TONIGHT, I'M HAVING CARROTS,
WHICH HAS 90 CALORIES IN IT,

WITH SOME HUMMUS,
AND THAT HAS 60 CALORIES,

AND THEN I'M HAVING ALMOND
BUTTER, AND THAT HAS 95.

AND I'M NOT LETTING MYSELF
GO OVER 1 SINGLE CALORIE

OF 1,200 IN A DAY.

I FEEL GOOD THAT I MADE THAT
GOOD, HEALTHY DECISION,

BUT IT STILL SUCKS THAT
I CAN'T EAT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON

AND MAINTAIN A HEALTHY WEIGHT.

I KNOW I'M LUCKY
TO HAVE THIS CHANCE,

SO I'M 100 PERCENT COMMITTED

AND DETERMINED TO DOING THIS
NO MATTER WHAT IT TAKES.

I NEVER WOULD HAVE THOUGHT
I WAS CAPABLE

OF STICKING TO A DIET LIKE THIS,

SO I'M REALLY PROUD OF MYSELF,

AND NEXT WEEK, I'M TAKING IT
TO A WHOLE NEW LEVEL

BECAUSE I'M GETTING A TRAINER
AND GOING TO A GYM,

AND I'VE NEVER DONE THAT,

BUT IF THAT'S WHAT IT'S GOING TO
TAKE TO DO THIS,

THEN THAT'S WHAT I'LL DO.

I KNOW I MESSED UP,
AND NOW I HAVE TO FIX IT,

AND I'M MAKING SURE I DO THAT
NO MATTER WHAT IT TAKES.

♪♪

♪♪

I'M STARTING SOMETHING NEW TODAY
THAT'S COMPLETELY FOREIGN

TO MY WAY OF LIFE RIGHT NOW.

I'M GOING TO WORK OUT
AT THE GYM,

AND I KNOW THIS IS GOING
TO BE PAINFUL

AND REALLY HARD,

BUT THIS IS SOMETHING
I NEED TO DO

AND SOMETHING I'M PROBABLY
GOING TO HAVE TO GET

MORE COMFORTABLE WITH,

AND I KNOW THAT
ALL THE THINGS I'M DOING

AND HOW HARD I'M WORKING
ARE NOT JUST TEMPORARY.

I HAVE TO START
DOING THINGS LIKE THIS

CONSISTENTLY
FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE.

SO I'M GOING TO DO EVERY
EXERCISE THE TRAINER TELLS ME,

AND I'M GOING TO DO IT
AS HARD AS I POSSIBLY CAN.

-HOW YOU DOING?
-HI.

GOOD. I'M SARAH.

-DERRICK.
-NICE TO MEET YOU.

NICE TO MEET YOU.
SO YOU READY TO GET TO WORK?

-YEAH.
-OKAY.

SO WE'RE GOING TO START
ON THESE ROPES OVER HERE.

HAVE YOU EVER SEEN THESE?

-YEAH.
-ALL RIGHT. COME ON.

YOU GOT IT?
ALL RIGHT.

SQUAT DOWN JUST A LITTLE BIT,
AND JUST COUNT.

THERE YOU GO.
THERE YOU GO.

EIGHTEEN, 19, 20, GOOD.
PUT IT DOWN.

NOW WE'RE GOING TO COME
OVER HERE TO THE BAR.

THERE YOU GO.
COME ON.

SO THERE YOU GO.
YOU DOING GOOD.

THERE YOU GO.
THREE, GOOD.

9, 10, AND RELAX.

THERE YOU GO.

ALL RIGHT. SO NOW WE'RE GOING TO
COME OVER HERE TO THE BOXING.

WE'RE GOING TO DO
A LITTLE PUNCHING.

THERE YOU GO.
OKAY?

GET YOUR RIGHT HAND
ON THERE, OKAY?

COME ON.

ONE, THERE YOU GO,
TWO, THREE.

DOING THESE EXERCISES MAKES ME
FEEL STRONGER MENTALLY

AND PHYSICALLY BECAUSE I AM
DOING AND ACCOMPLISHING THINGS

THAT I NEVER THOUGHT
I WOULD BE ABLE TO DO.

NOW WE'RE GOING TO
PUSH THE SLED.

THERE YOU GO.

I WAS EXPECTING TO COME
IN HERE AND BE LIKE,

"NO. I CAN'T DO THIS,"
BUT I DID IT.

I DID SOMETHING I THOUGHT
I WASN'T GOING TO BE ABLE TO DO.

KEEP GOING.
KEEP GOING.

AND I FEEL REALLY INSPIRED
BECAUSE I KNOW

THAT I CAN DO ANYTHING
I PUT MY MIND TO.

MY SURGERY IS SCHEDULED
IN TWO WEEKS,

AND WHEN I SHOW UP
AND STAND ON THAT SCALE,

I WANT TO KNOW THAT I DID
EVERYTHING POSSIBLE

TO GET THAT NUMBER
AS LOW AS I COULD.

I JUST REALLY HOPE
IT'S GOING TO BE ENOUGH

TO KEEP ME FROM
LOSING MY SURGERY.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

I'M A NERVOUS WRECK RIGHT NOW.

I'M JUST WAITING FOR DR. NOW
TO COME AND GET MY WEIGHT CHECK

AND FIND OUT IF WE'RE
MOVING AHEAD TODAY OR NOT,

BUT I KNOW THIS IS
A BIG GOAL TO HIT,

SO I REALLY HOPE I GET
TO MOVE AHEAD WITH SURGERY,

BUT I'M STILL REALLY SCARED
THAT MY WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY

WILL BE CANCELED,

AND IF THAT HAPPENS,
I'M GOING TO BE DEVASTATED.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

Sarah: I'M A WRECK RIGHT NOW.

I JUST WANT TO FIND
OUT MY WEIGHT

AND THAT I'M STILL
GETTING SURGERY TODAY.

-GOOD MORNING.
-GOOD MORNING.

-GOOD MORNING.
-HOW Y'ALL DOING?

-GOOD.
-SO YOU REMEMBER WE HAD A DEAL.

YOU LOSE 40 POUNDS,
WE'LL DO YOUR SURGERY.

IF NOT, WE'RE GOING
TO SEND YOU HOME.

OKAY.

DON'T THINK JUST BECAUSE
YOU HAVE BEEN PREPPED

THAT WE WON'T CANCEL
YOUR SURGERY, OKAY?

OKAY.

SO LET'S GET YOU DOWN
TO THE SCALE.

♪♪

THIS IS A WEIRD SCALE.

YOU WERE BACK UP TO 603.

SO YOUR GOAL TODAY
IS TO BE AT OR BELOW 563.

♪♪

SO YOU DID IT.
GOOD JOB.

WE WILL MOVE AHEAD
WITH YOUR SURGERY TODAY.

-GREAT.
-OKAY.

[ SIGHS ]

I'M SO RELIEVED I DID THIS

AND THAT I'M ABOUT TO GET
THE SURGERY I NEED.

ALL RIGHT. SARAH, LET'S GET YOU
STARTED AND GET YOU TO SURGERY.

YOU THINK I'M GOING
TO BE OKAY?

YEAH.
YOU'LL BE JUST FINE.

-OKAY.
-ALL RIGHT?

-THANK YOU.
-ALL RIGHT.

-OOH, YOU LOOK GOOD!
-DO I?

YES, YOU DO!

I HOPE I MAKE IT
THROUGH THIS.

OH. YOU'LL MAKE IT
THROUGH THIS.

Heather: THERE'S NO REASON
FOR YOU NOT TO.

YES.

Heather: I'M JUST EXCITED THAT
THIS IS FINALLY HAPPENING.

WE'RE ALL TRYING TO TELL HER
THAT SHE'S GOING TO BE FINE,

BUT THERE'S NO WAY TO REALLY
GET RID OF THAT FEAR

UNTIL SHE COMES
OUT OF THE SURGERY,

BUT SHE KNOWS THAT
SHE NEEDS THIS, TOO,

JUST AS MUCH AS EVERYONE ELSE.

YOU'LL BE ALL RIGHT.

NO. YOU'RE FINE.
YOU'RE FINE.

CALM DOWN.

HONEY, YOU'RE GOING
TO BE ALL RIGHT.

Barbara:
SARAH IS ABSOLUTELY TERRIFIED.

HER ANXIETY LEVEL
IS THROUGH THE ROOF

BECAUSE SHE'S AFRAID THAT
SHE'S GOING TO DIE ON THE TABLE.

WE'LL BE PRAYING FOR YOU.

SO I'VE BEEN TRYING TO REASSURE
HER ABOUT THAT AND TELL HER

THAT WE'RE PRAYING FOR HER.

Sarah: I'M AFRAID THAT MY HEART
IS GOING TO STOP BEATING

OR I'M JUST NOT
GOING TO WAKE UP.

BUT NOTHING IS GOING TO STOP ME

FROM MOVING AHEAD
AND DOING THIS.

I KNOW THAT I DON'T HAVE
A LIFE WITHOUT THIS,

SO NO MATTER WHAT,
I'M GOING UNDER.

♪♪

Dr. Nowzaradan: TODAY, WE ARE
DOING A GASTRIC-SLEEVE PROCEDURE

ON SARAH.

THIS WILL HELP HER
TO CONTROL HER EATING

AND STAY ON TRACK EVEN MORE.

BUT DOING SURGERY ON ANYONE
THAT'S SUPER MORBIDLY OBESE

IS VERY HIGH-RISK.

ALL RIGHT.
BRING THE LIGHT DOWN.

THE STRAIN OF OPERATION
OR EVEN ANESTHESIA

CAN PUSH HER BODY
OVER THE LIMIT,

AND ANY NUMBER OF THINGS
CAN CREATE AN ISSUE

THAT WILL PREVENT US
FROM FINISHING THE OPERATION.

SO WE HAVE TO BE VERY CAREFUL

NOT TO PUSH HER BODY TOO HARD.

BECAUSE IF ANY PART OF HER
BODY STARTS TO GIVE OUT,

LIKE HER HEART OR LUNGS,

THEN WE MIGHT NOT
BE ABLE TO SAVE HER.

BUT IF WE ARE ABLE TO
COMPLETE THE OPERATION

SUCCESSFULLY TODAY,

THIS SURGERY IS GOING TO BE
A BIG HELP TO SARAH

BECAUSE THE SLEEVE
GASTRECTOMY IS AN OPERATION

THAT WE REMOVE 80 TO 90 PERCENT
OF THE STOMACH

AND LEAVE A LONG, SKINNY TUBE
THAT IS SHAPED LIKE A SLEEVE.

THE SURGERY WILL ALSO ALTER
THE DIGESTIVE SYSTEM

AND METABOLISM OF A PERSON

SO THAT THE PATIENT
IS LESS HUNGRY

AND CAN GET FULL REALLY QUICK.

♪♪

Barbara: WAITING IS HARD.
I'M KIND OF ANXIOUS.

ALL KINDS OF THINGS
GO THROUGH MY MIND.

YOU KNOW, IS SHE OKAY?

I'M TRYING TO STAY POSITIVE,

AND I JUST WANT IT
TO BE OVER FOR HER.

[ MACHINE BEEPS ]

KEEP PULLING.
GOOD.

OKAY. CAN YOU TURN
THE ROOM LIGHT ON?

OKAY. ALL FINISHED.

Dr. Nowzaradan:
SARAH'S SURGERY WENT VERY WELL.

SO WE WILL GET HER TO RECOVERY.

FOR THE FIRST MONTH
AFTER SURGERY,

SHE WILL BE ON A LIQUID DIET,

AND SHE SHOULD BE ABLE TO LOSE

ABOUT 25 POUNDS
IN THIS NEXT MONTH,

AND AFTER THAT, 15
TO 20 POUNDS A MONTH

UNTIL SHE GETS CLOSER
TO HER TARGET WEIGHT.

BUT WE NEED TO MAKE SURE
THAT SHE WILL STICK

TO HER THERAPY
APPOINTMENTS WITH HER MOM

BECAUSE SARAH WILL NEED
TO CONTINUE

WORKING ON HER CORE ISSUES

THAT HAVE BEEN
DRIVING HER TO EAT

THAT MOSTLY REVOLVE
AROUND HER MOM,

AND THE CONSEQUENCES
IF SHE DOESN'T

IS THAT SHE WILL EVENTUALLY
START TO GAIN AGAIN,

AND WE CAN'T LET THAT HAPPEN.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

READY?

Sarah: IT'S BEEN A COUPLE
MONTHS SINCE MY SURGERY,

AND THE FIRST WEEK
WAS REALLY ROUGH,

BUT AFTER THAT,
THINGS GOT BETTER.

SO I'M FEELING GREAT,
AND I'M STARTING TO BE ABLE

TO DO NEW THINGS
THAT I'VE NEVER DONE BEFORE.

OH, MY GOD. LOOK AT IT.

WOW.
I LOVE IT.

I KNEW YOU WOULD.

RIGHT NOW, I AM AT THE BEACH
SEEING THE OCEAN

FOR THE FIRST TIME,
AND IT FEELS ABSOLUTELY AMAZING.

I HONESTLY THOUGHT THAT I WOULD
NEVER MAKE IT TO THE BEACH,

SO TO BE HERE RIGHT NOW
STEPPING IN THE OCEAN,

IT'S A DREAM COME TRUE.

AND I THINK THERE WAS A PART
OF ME THAT JUST GAVE UP ON LIFE,

SO I DIDN'T EVEN
TRY TO DO ANYTHING,

BUT NOW THAT I CAN, IT'S JUST
A WHOLE NEW WORLD TO ME.

I WANT TO GO FURTHER.

SO I'M REALLY HAPPY RIGHT NOW,
AND I THINK THE BIGGEST,

MOST IMPORTANT CHANGE IN MY LIFE

IS HOW MY RELATIONSHIP
WITH MY MOTHER IS IMPROVING.

IT'S NICE BEING OUT
HERE WITH MY MOM

BECAUSE WE'VE NEVER DONE
ANYTHING LIKE THIS TOGETHER

THE WHOLE TIME
I'VE BEEN ALIVE.

WE'RE STILL GOING TO
THERAPY TOGETHER,

AND WE BOTH KNOW WE STILL HAVE
A LONG WAYS TO GO,

BUT I FEEL LIKE OUR RELATIONSHIP

IS GETTING TO
A REALLY GOOD PLACE,

AND THAT'S WHAT I'M MOST EXCITED
ABOUT BECAUSE I LOVE MY MOM,

AND I'VE WANTED US TO BE
IN A BETTER PLACE FOR SO LONG.

IT'S VERY IMPORTANT TO ME
THAT MY RELATIONSHIP WITH SARAH

IS BETTER THAN IT USED TO BE.

AS A MOTHER,
IT BREAKS YOUR HEART

TO NOT BE ABLE
TO COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR KIDS

AND GET ACROSS WHAT
YOU'RE TRYING TO SAY,

BUT SHE LISTENS MORE TO ME NOW,
AND IT JUST MEANS EVERYTHING.

I AM PROUD OF YOU,
AND I LOVE YOU.

THANKS.
I LOVE YOU.

GIVE ME A HUG.

Sarah: I'M JUST SO THANKFUL
FOR EVERYTHING

AND HOW MUCH PROGRESS I'VE MADE.

♪♪

♪♪

I'M FEELING REALLY GOOD,

AND I'M MOVING BETTER
THAN I HAVE IN YEARS.

I'M BREATHING BETTER
THAN I HAVE IN YEARS.

I'M JUST DOING GOOD OVERALL,
MENTALLY AND PHYSICALLY.

OH, MY GOD. THAT'S GREAT.
YAY!

I SEE THE PROGRESS
I'M MAKING EACH MONTH,

AND IT MAKES ME MORE CONFIDENT
EVERY TIME I SEE THAT.

-HELLO.
-HI.

-HI.
-HOW Y'ALL DOING?

-GOOD.
-DOING GOOD.

ALL RIGHT.
YOU ARE AT 458 TODAY.

YES.

SARAH, YOU'RE DOING GREAT.

HOW DO YOU FEEL?

GOOD.

YOU'RE FEELING YOU CAN
GET AROUND BETTER?

I CAN LIFT MY LEG
AND HOLD IT.

SHE'S NEVER BEEN ABLE
TO DO THAT BEFORE.

THOSE LITTLE THINGS, ONE BY ONE,
WILL SURPRISE YOU EVERY DAY,

AND EVERY DAY, YOU'RE GOING
TO BE ABLE TO DO SOMETHING NEW.

-OKAY.
-ALL RIGHT.

SO IF YOU STICK WITH IT,

THE GOAL WILL BE FOR YOU TO
BE 190 POUNDS WITHIN A YEAR.

-OKAY. THAT'S CRAZY.
-WOW.

-THAT IS.
-YEAH.

AND ONCE YOU GET IN THE 300s,

I THINK YOU'LL BE READY
FOR SKIN REMOVAL.

SO KEEP IT UP,
AND I'M PROUD OF YOU.

-OKAY.
-OKAY?

THANK YOU.

ALL RIGHT.
I'LL SEE YOU NEXT MONTH.

-OKAY.
-BYE.

-BYE.
-BYE-BYE.

Barbara: 190, THAT'S
GOING TO BE GREAT.

-SKIN SURGERY.
-WOW.

WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
WITH MYSELF?

ANYTHING YOU WANT.

ANYTHING YOU WANT.

THIS IS EXCITING.

AFTER A ROCKY START,
SARAH IS DOING VERY WELL

AND STAYING ON TRACK,
SO I'M REALLY PROUD OF HER.

THE KEY HAS BEEN ADDRESSING
THE RELATIONSHIP AND DYNAMIC

BETWEEN HER AND HER MOM,

SO AS LONG AS THEY KEEP
GOING TO THERAPY TOGETHER

AND WORKING ON THINGS,

THEN I'M CONFIDENT THAT WE CAN
GET HER TO HER GOAL WEIGHT.

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

I FINALLY MADE IT UNDER 400,

SO ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS
FROM EVER SINCE

I WAS REALLY YOUNG CAME TO
SEE ME AND CELEBRATE WITH ME,

AND WE WENT AND GOT OUR HAIR
AND MAKEUP DONE.

OH, MY GOD.
I LOVE IT!

♪♪

READY?

I SEE MY FUTURE NOW AS SOMETHING
WITH ALL THIS POSSIBILITY

BECAUSE I'M STARTING
TO DISCOVER THE HOPES

AND DREAMS I NEVER
LET MYSELF HAVE,

AND I'VE NEVER BEEN
ON A DATE EVER.

I HAD NO SELF-ESTEEM,
AND I FIGURED

NO ONE WOULD DATE THE BIG GIRL,

BUT NOW, I'M FEELING
GOOD ABOUT MYSELF,

AND I'M FEELING
A LOT MORE CONFIDENT,

SO CHINA TALKED ME INTO
SIGNING UP TO A DATING WEBSITE.

-I'LL BE RIGHT OUT.
-OKAY.

IT HAS BEEN SO LONG
SINCE I HAVE FELT

REMOTELY THIS GOOD ABOUT MYSELF.

AND I'M DISCOVERING MYSELF
THROUGH THIS PROCESS,

AND NOT ONLY AM I LIKING
THE PERSON I'M FINDING,

I THINK SHE HAS
A LOT MORE POTENTIAL

THAN I EVER GAVE HER CREDIT FOR.

WHICH BEST DESCRIBES YOUR
BODY TYPE, SLENDER, AVERAGE,

ATHLETIC, TONED, HEAVYSET?

JUST PUT SLENDER.

[ LAUGHS ]

THIS ONE?

OH, THAT ONE IS CUTE.

I WANT TO DO THINGS
AND GO PLACES AND MEET SOMEONE

AND HAVE A FAMILY ONE DAY.

A YEAR AGO, I WASN'T GOING
TO LIVE MUCH LONGER,

AND NOW I HAVE A WHOLE LIFE
AND A FUTURE AHEAD OF ME

THAT I CAN'T WAIT FOR
BECAUSE I'M IN CONTROL

OF MY LIFE AND FULFILLING
THE DREAMS I HAVE NOW

AND ENJOYING EVERY SECOND OF IT.