All language subtitles for Pornopung.2013.720p.BluRay.DTS.x264-CtrlHD

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic Download
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English Download
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French Download
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian Download
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil)
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish Download
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.SubtitleDB.org today 2 00:00:22,459 --> 00:00:24,126 Hello? 3 00:00:26,126 --> 00:00:27,918 Are you Karl? 4 00:00:28,709 --> 00:00:30,751 I'm Christian. 5 00:00:32,584 --> 00:00:36,584 The guy from Stavanger. Moving to Oslo. 6 00:00:38,126 --> 00:00:43,251 - Why are you moving to Oslo? - To finish my sociology studies. 7 00:00:43,251 --> 00:00:46,168 Sure, but why are you moving? 8 00:00:47,459 --> 00:00:51,501 I guess I'm just tired of living at home. 9 00:00:51,501 --> 00:00:53,876 Are you single? 10 00:00:53,876 --> 00:00:55,584 Am I...? 11 00:00:56,876 --> 00:00:58,626 Yes, I am. 12 00:00:59,709 --> 00:01:01,501 Are you gay? 13 00:01:05,251 --> 00:01:07,001 No, I'm not. 14 00:01:07,668 --> 00:01:10,626 You hesitated. Are you sure? 15 00:01:11,334 --> 00:01:13,584 Yes, I'm positive. 16 00:01:13,584 --> 00:01:18,209 Move a little closer. Let me look at your face. 17 00:01:20,876 --> 00:01:22,709 Cool. 18 00:01:24,084 --> 00:01:25,334 Hello? 19 00:01:25,334 --> 00:01:28,793 - Did you have a nice talk? - Yes. Stop nagging! 20 00:01:28,793 --> 00:01:31,543 Where in Oslo are you staying? 21 00:01:31,543 --> 00:01:34,709 - I'm not sure. - Not all parts are safe. 22 00:01:34,709 --> 00:01:37,001 What do you mean? 23 00:01:37,001 --> 00:01:40,251 - Do you have a rape alarm? - Shut up! 24 00:01:44,626 --> 00:01:49,959 - Why are you going to Oslo? - To study. How about you? 25 00:01:49,959 --> 00:01:54,418 I'm not going to Oslo. Are you crazy? My little brother is. 26 00:01:54,418 --> 00:01:59,168 You should get better acquainted. It's a long train ride. 27 00:01:59,168 --> 00:02:02,751 Just be yourself and everything will be fine. 28 00:02:02,751 --> 00:02:04,668 I love you. 29 00:02:18,084 --> 00:02:19,793 - Hi. - Hi. 30 00:02:20,626 --> 00:02:24,376 - Are you that guy's little brother? - That's me. 31 00:02:24,376 --> 00:02:29,043 Do you think I could get your brother's phone number? 32 00:02:29,043 --> 00:02:32,209 Yes. Of course. Sure you can. 33 00:02:32,209 --> 00:02:35,918 - Thank you. - That is not a problem. 34 00:02:35,918 --> 00:02:37,626 I got it! 35 00:02:52,376 --> 00:02:54,376 - Hi. - Hi. 36 00:02:55,959 --> 00:03:00,168 - Is this where Karl lives? - Who's asking? 37 00:03:00,626 --> 00:03:04,459 Christian. I think I'm moving in here. 38 00:03:06,334 --> 00:03:07,751 Hi there. Leo. 39 00:03:09,543 --> 00:03:12,168 You're just in time. 40 00:03:12,626 --> 00:03:16,668 - Is that for me? - Sorry, no. It's for Karl. 41 00:03:16,668 --> 00:03:20,918 - Is it his birthday? - Write "100" on that. 42 00:03:27,418 --> 00:03:30,543 - Red towel means "help." - Is he with someone? 43 00:03:31,043 --> 00:03:32,334 Open it. 44 00:03:32,334 --> 00:03:36,459 We can't open the door! What if they're...? 45 00:03:43,709 --> 00:03:45,959 Congratulations! 46 00:03:45,959 --> 00:03:50,001 Leo, you didn't have to bake a cake! 47 00:03:50,001 --> 00:03:51,876 Hey, boss. 48 00:03:51,876 --> 00:03:54,043 Say hi to... 49 00:03:54,043 --> 00:03:56,959 You, say hi to Christian. 50 00:03:59,126 --> 00:04:01,584 Christian. Nice to meet you. 51 00:04:01,584 --> 00:04:04,293 - The hats! - Right. 52 00:04:04,293 --> 00:04:06,293 Cool! 53 00:04:07,293 --> 00:04:09,376 Don't forget to blow. 54 00:04:11,209 --> 00:04:14,334 Is it your birthday, or what? 55 00:04:17,709 --> 00:04:21,334 - Karl, aren't you late for work? - Shit! 56 00:04:21,334 --> 00:04:24,209 I'm a huge fan. I love you. 57 00:04:31,751 --> 00:04:33,709 See you later. 58 00:04:44,918 --> 00:04:48,376 Have you seriously had sex with 100 women? 59 00:04:48,376 --> 00:04:51,209 - Did you catch her name? - Cake lady. 60 00:04:51,209 --> 00:04:54,043 - 7. - 5. 61 00:04:54,043 --> 00:04:56,459 She was a club, I think. Give me a seven of clubs. 62 00:04:56,459 --> 00:04:59,584 I think you've used them up. Hang on. 63 00:05:00,168 --> 00:05:03,168 100 women? How many kids do you have? 64 00:05:03,168 --> 00:05:05,001 On a scale of 1 to 10: 65 00:05:05,001 --> 00:05:07,751 How hairy are your balls? 66 00:05:07,751 --> 00:05:11,626 - Huh? - How many women have you fucked? 67 00:05:11,626 --> 00:05:15,834 - Does that matter? - We'll still love you. 68 00:05:15,834 --> 00:05:17,251 Five... 69 00:05:17,251 --> 00:05:19,293 Six... 70 00:05:19,293 --> 00:05:21,209 ...thousand. 71 00:05:25,501 --> 00:05:31,751 Your doorbell doesn't work. When I pushed the buzzer and tried... 72 00:05:31,751 --> 00:05:36,376 Cool story, bro. We were talking about fucking. 73 00:05:36,376 --> 00:05:39,959 OK, so fucking is all you talk about here? 74 00:05:39,959 --> 00:05:44,834 Freud said that's all people talk about. We're just honest about it. 75 00:05:44,834 --> 00:05:48,584 What about you, Leo? Does that apply to you too? 76 00:05:48,584 --> 00:05:54,293 You've been duped your entire life. Girls don't want boys like you. 77 00:05:54,293 --> 00:05:57,959 But you're our roommate, so we'll help you. 78 00:05:57,959 --> 00:06:02,793 The women won the battle of the sexes. They call all the shots. 79 00:06:02,793 --> 00:06:06,959 Sorry, but we have to shave your balls now. 80 00:06:08,376 --> 00:06:11,126 Christian! Christian... 81 00:06:13,668 --> 00:06:15,501 He seems nice. 82 00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:18,001 Son of a bitch! 83 00:06:18,001 --> 00:06:21,959 CRACK, BACK & SACK 84 00:06:55,376 --> 00:06:59,418 You will be presented with certain methods - 85 00:06:59,418 --> 00:07:02,668 - and what those methods are based on. 86 00:07:02,668 --> 00:07:06,543 And you will also learn about scientific writing. 87 00:07:07,084 --> 00:07:10,126 How do we write scientific papers? 88 00:07:11,376 --> 00:07:16,376 In other words, your final thesis should focus on... 89 00:07:24,501 --> 00:07:28,126 OK? Is that clear to everyone? 90 00:07:29,168 --> 00:07:32,126 There are mandatory activities... 91 00:07:55,918 --> 00:07:58,668 - Please... - Problem? 92 00:07:58,668 --> 00:08:02,668 - It doesn't work! - Is this your bachelor thesis? 93 00:08:02,668 --> 00:08:07,709 No, but I have four minutes to get this in, or I'll fail. 94 00:08:11,626 --> 00:08:14,459 Thank you! You're my hero! 95 00:08:14,459 --> 00:08:16,584 All I need is a white steed. 96 00:08:16,584 --> 00:08:19,126 - Were you here last year? - No. 97 00:08:19,126 --> 00:08:22,251 This is my first semester in Oslo. 98 00:08:22,251 --> 00:08:25,959 - I live with... - Sorry, I have to go. 99 00:08:25,959 --> 00:08:30,418 But we're going out for beers at The Owlery later. 100 00:08:30,418 --> 00:08:32,668 - Christian. - Hi. Mylian. 101 00:08:33,126 --> 00:08:35,918 - Miriam? - No. Mylian. 102 00:08:35,918 --> 00:08:39,126 - Mylian. - See you later. I have to run. 103 00:08:42,168 --> 00:08:45,084 - You got a new job? - At a nursing home. 104 00:08:45,084 --> 00:08:51,251 - I didn't know that. How is it? - Fine. But those old folks are insane. 105 00:08:51,251 --> 00:08:52,876 Cool. 106 00:09:00,584 --> 00:09:02,376 Cheers. 107 00:09:12,334 --> 00:09:14,376 - Hi. - Hi. 108 00:09:19,459 --> 00:09:22,001 - What is this? - Cake. 109 00:09:22,668 --> 00:09:28,626 Congratulations. You are now officially Oslo's biggest asshole. 110 00:09:28,626 --> 00:09:31,418 - Was it magical? - Don't be jealous. 111 00:09:31,418 --> 00:09:33,709 Chris, come here! 112 00:09:37,459 --> 00:09:42,168 - "Feed the goat"? - What happens if you don't feed it? 113 00:09:42,168 --> 00:09:47,168 - It gets hungry? - First, yes. And then it dies. 114 00:09:47,168 --> 00:09:50,959 But don't worry. Goats are omnivorous. 115 00:09:50,959 --> 00:09:54,459 - We're going out. - Sorry, I have to read. 116 00:09:54,459 --> 00:09:56,084 Awesome! 117 00:09:56,084 --> 00:10:00,584 Our new roommate is an asexual academic. 118 00:10:00,584 --> 00:10:06,209 I like that you label me as asexual because I haven't slept with... 119 00:10:07,043 --> 00:10:12,126 - A thousand million women. - It isn't about the number. 120 00:10:12,834 --> 00:10:16,126 OK, you got me there. It is about the number. 121 00:10:16,126 --> 00:10:21,334 But it's also about radiating sexuality. Look at me, Christian. 122 00:10:21,334 --> 00:10:23,043 Look at this! 123 00:10:23,668 --> 00:10:28,293 I sweat fucking orgies! Come on, take a whiff. 124 00:10:28,293 --> 00:10:32,834 - No, I'm not going to smell you. - Come on. I sweat pussy. 125 00:10:32,834 --> 00:10:35,376 - Want to see my dick? - No. 126 00:10:35,376 --> 00:10:40,084 - I love showing off my dick. - I don't doubt it. 127 00:10:40,084 --> 00:10:42,876 - Just look down. - No. 128 00:10:42,876 --> 00:10:46,168 - And there it is. - Please come out! 129 00:10:46,168 --> 00:10:49,376 You could have one chick licking your balls - 130 00:10:49,376 --> 00:10:53,543 - and one with your "nose" in her mouth. 131 00:10:53,543 --> 00:10:56,084 - Please come out with me! - No. 132 00:10:56,084 --> 00:10:58,001 Fucking loser! 133 00:10:58,834 --> 00:11:01,918 You are the perfect candidate. 134 00:11:02,793 --> 00:11:04,418 For what? 135 00:11:04,418 --> 00:11:09,501 If you do everything I tell you for the next half year, - 136 00:11:09,501 --> 00:11:13,793 - you can easily reach 123. - What's that mean? 137 00:11:14,626 --> 00:11:19,626 Casanova shared his cock with a total of 122 women. 138 00:11:19,626 --> 00:11:23,501 So Karl's goal in life is to ravish 123 women. 139 00:11:23,501 --> 00:11:25,126 Fuck yeah! 140 00:11:25,126 --> 00:11:30,418 Is it possible to get AIDS more than once? Like double-AIDS? 141 00:11:30,418 --> 00:11:36,209 - Let it out, Chris. I've been there. - I haven't known you that long. 142 00:11:36,209 --> 00:11:42,293 But I think you have used all your energy to fuck as much as possible. 143 00:11:42,293 --> 00:11:45,168 I don't think you've slept with 100. 144 00:11:45,168 --> 00:11:49,501 By New Year's Eve, I'm going to celebrate that 123 women - 145 00:11:49,501 --> 00:11:52,584 - have been swept away by The Package. 146 00:11:53,084 --> 00:11:55,501 And if you want, - 147 00:11:55,501 --> 00:11:59,168 - we can make a deal right here and fucking now: 148 00:11:59,501 --> 00:12:04,084 If you do everything I say for the next five months, - 149 00:12:04,084 --> 00:12:09,918 - I'll turn you into a man women want to share their sexuality with. 150 00:12:09,918 --> 00:12:14,709 OK, so basically I'll be your slave for a half year... 151 00:12:14,709 --> 00:12:18,584 - Imagine how much you'll learn! - Sorry, bro. 152 00:12:18,584 --> 00:12:20,751 Chris, come on. Chris! 153 00:12:22,709 --> 00:12:24,793 Imagine the power! 154 00:12:25,959 --> 00:12:30,209 - What did he say? - "Imagine the power, Christian!" 155 00:12:30,209 --> 00:12:34,251 I think he loves this image of himself as a sex god. 156 00:12:34,584 --> 00:12:36,793 And you? 157 00:12:36,793 --> 00:12:41,709 - What about me? - Do you want to be seen as a sex god? 158 00:12:43,043 --> 00:12:48,126 I happen to be an atheist, so I don't believe in gods. 159 00:12:48,126 --> 00:12:51,251 But that's a stupid answer. 160 00:12:51,626 --> 00:12:53,334 Honest answer. 161 00:12:54,334 --> 00:12:57,334 Seriously? Yes. I do. 162 00:12:57,334 --> 00:12:58,751 You do? 163 00:12:59,751 --> 00:13:03,168 You want me to view you as a sex god? 164 00:13:03,834 --> 00:13:05,501 Why? 165 00:13:09,501 --> 00:13:14,334 According to Aristotle, being sexually active is a virtue. 166 00:13:14,334 --> 00:13:17,209 So according to virtue ethics... 167 00:13:17,209 --> 00:13:20,376 Come on, no sneaky philosophical answers. 168 00:13:20,376 --> 00:13:25,584 A sneaky question deserves a sneaky answer. Tit for tat. 169 00:13:26,918 --> 00:13:30,834 Are you coming to The Owlery tonight? 170 00:13:30,834 --> 00:13:33,543 I was planning on reading. 171 00:13:34,251 --> 00:13:35,751 Are you going? 172 00:13:35,751 --> 00:13:37,876 Yes. With you. 173 00:13:41,043 --> 00:13:44,501 - All right. Maybe. - Not maybe. Join me. 174 00:13:45,959 --> 00:13:51,376 And I'll tell all my girlfriends what a sex god you are. 175 00:13:52,751 --> 00:13:54,959 They already know. 176 00:13:54,959 --> 00:13:57,918 I sent out a group e-mail. 177 00:13:57,918 --> 00:14:02,876 If you have any intention of passing on your genes, be careful. 178 00:14:02,876 --> 00:14:07,293 "Mylian" sounds like something from Lord of the Rings. 179 00:14:07,293 --> 00:14:12,209 I hereby forbid you to think about Mulan...Mylian...Muliano. 180 00:14:12,584 --> 00:14:16,209 - Why? - Because you like her. 181 00:14:16,209 --> 00:14:19,876 I can't talk to her because I like her? 182 00:14:19,876 --> 00:14:24,751 Like her as much as you want, just stop caring so much. 183 00:14:25,793 --> 00:14:29,668 Mylion... Muylita... Muyliano... 184 00:14:30,834 --> 00:14:34,459 Sounds like a French porn actress. 185 00:14:34,459 --> 00:14:36,834 She may not even like me. 186 00:14:39,293 --> 00:14:43,501 Can we talk about something else? Forget it! 187 00:14:43,501 --> 00:14:46,584 Don't worry. They'll calm down, mom. 188 00:15:11,418 --> 00:15:13,251 Dick or sack? 189 00:15:13,251 --> 00:15:15,834 - What? - Dick or sack? 190 00:15:18,209 --> 00:15:19,751 - Sack? - Dick. 191 00:15:19,751 --> 00:15:21,959 - It was dick. - OK. 192 00:15:31,084 --> 00:15:33,001 Dick or sack? 193 00:15:35,459 --> 00:15:37,626 Sack. 194 00:15:37,626 --> 00:15:40,459 - What the hell is that? - Huh? 195 00:15:40,459 --> 00:15:44,751 What is that? Your dick is supposed to be a reward. 196 00:15:44,751 --> 00:15:47,626 That looks like a fucking punishment. 197 00:15:47,626 --> 00:15:49,334 Dick or sack? 198 00:15:50,334 --> 00:15:52,209 - Dick. - Sack. 199 00:15:52,209 --> 00:15:57,251 People go out to get pussy. We go out to give dick. 200 00:15:59,043 --> 00:16:01,084 - Hello, boys. - Hi! 201 00:16:01,084 --> 00:16:04,001 - This is Christian. - Elisa. 202 00:16:04,001 --> 00:16:09,459 He may seem shy, but once you get his clothes off, he's a monster. 203 00:16:09,459 --> 00:16:11,709 Like the Hulk? 204 00:16:11,709 --> 00:16:15,543 I like to call myself the Incredible Spunk. 205 00:16:19,293 --> 00:16:21,793 That was really bad. 206 00:16:25,668 --> 00:16:28,959 Chicks consider me a good lay, period. 207 00:16:28,959 --> 00:16:34,293 We don't realize that you're just using us as hot sex objects. 208 00:16:35,168 --> 00:16:38,043 Let me know if you feel abused. 209 00:16:38,043 --> 00:16:40,584 Don't you worry about that. 210 00:16:40,584 --> 00:16:43,251 Nobody can abuse the Spunk. 211 00:16:45,626 --> 00:16:49,001 - Are you all right? - Yes. I'm fine. 212 00:16:49,793 --> 00:16:54,043 But you really have to stop saying Spunk. 213 00:16:54,043 --> 00:16:56,876 I'll do my best. 214 00:16:56,876 --> 00:17:01,293 - Elisa, where are we going? - It's your party. 215 00:17:01,293 --> 00:17:06,168 Let's go to The Owlery. Good prices, good people. 216 00:17:06,168 --> 00:17:10,293 Fuck it! The Party Prince has spoken. 217 00:17:10,293 --> 00:17:12,668 One last round of champagne? 218 00:17:41,709 --> 00:17:43,793 - Has she called? - Huh? 219 00:17:43,793 --> 00:17:46,293 - Has she called? - No, not yet. 220 00:17:46,293 --> 00:17:51,959 - Have you texted her? - Three times. She hasn't responded. 221 00:17:52,543 --> 00:17:57,168 Trust me. Don't send any more. You'll just seem pushy. 222 00:17:57,168 --> 00:17:59,376 Now you sound like Karl. 223 00:17:59,376 --> 00:18:04,293 I hate to admit it, but sometimes he's actually right. 224 00:18:08,126 --> 00:18:09,709 Fuck it. 225 00:18:09,709 --> 00:18:12,168 - I'm leaving. - No, no! 226 00:18:12,168 --> 00:18:17,751 Do you realize how easy it is to hook up here? These hippies are starving. 227 00:18:17,751 --> 00:18:20,209 - Some other time. - I'm serious! 228 00:18:20,209 --> 00:18:24,668 They don't care if your balls aren't shaved, as long as your face is. 229 00:18:24,668 --> 00:18:28,418 Some other time. I'll see you later. 230 00:18:28,418 --> 00:18:31,251 - Christian... - See you later. 231 00:18:32,626 --> 00:18:37,126 Chris, could you bring Elisa home? She has to get to bed. 232 00:18:37,126 --> 00:18:41,876 - Bring Elisa home, Christian. - I don't want to get puked on. 233 00:18:41,876 --> 00:18:44,751 Fuck you! What time is it? 234 00:18:54,959 --> 00:18:58,501 I'm OK. I can take your shoes. 235 00:18:58,501 --> 00:19:02,626 - Up you go! - You're a good person. 236 00:19:07,001 --> 00:19:10,334 You aren't going to rape me, are you? 237 00:19:10,334 --> 00:19:14,418 No, I am definitely not going to rape you. 238 00:19:14,418 --> 00:19:17,334 - Come on. - That's swell of you. 239 00:19:18,126 --> 00:19:20,751 Can you make it from here? 240 00:19:20,751 --> 00:19:23,626 - Great. OK. Bye. - Bye. 241 00:21:17,376 --> 00:21:19,376 Rise and shine, Karl! 242 00:21:19,376 --> 00:21:24,084 Oh, shit. My alarm didn't ring. I have to get to work. 243 00:21:28,376 --> 00:21:30,459 See you later. 244 00:21:39,209 --> 00:21:40,959 You live here? 245 00:21:42,168 --> 00:21:44,043 Were you... 246 00:21:45,626 --> 00:21:49,501 - Were you out late last night? - Yeah. 247 00:21:49,501 --> 00:21:51,626 Real late. 248 00:21:55,751 --> 00:22:00,293 Are you hungry? I could make some chicken. 249 00:22:00,293 --> 00:22:04,251 No thanks, I'm not that hungry. I should leave. 250 00:22:04,668 --> 00:22:07,043 Do you have all your things? 251 00:22:08,001 --> 00:22:09,709 But... 252 00:22:11,918 --> 00:22:14,251 - See you later? - Yeah. 253 00:22:14,251 --> 00:22:16,459 I'll give you a call, OK? 254 00:22:34,751 --> 00:22:36,501 She was cute. 255 00:22:38,418 --> 00:22:40,793 So fucking - 256 00:22:41,376 --> 00:22:43,501 - tight. 257 00:22:45,334 --> 00:22:49,668 - But not worthy of breakfast? - She snored. 258 00:22:49,668 --> 00:22:56,043 Or, she made these sleeping sounds. Some sort of weird breathing. 259 00:22:56,043 --> 00:22:58,168 What was her name? 260 00:22:59,709 --> 00:23:01,168 I can't remember. 261 00:23:01,626 --> 00:23:03,543 Just feeding the goat. 262 00:23:05,209 --> 00:23:07,334 She was hot. 263 00:23:07,334 --> 00:23:09,918 A little boring in bed. 264 00:23:57,834 --> 00:23:59,293 Dick or sack? 265 00:24:01,084 --> 00:24:03,084 - Dick. - Nope. 266 00:24:04,668 --> 00:24:07,418 - Of course it is. - Nope. 267 00:24:29,709 --> 00:24:31,959 - OK. - What? 268 00:24:31,959 --> 00:24:34,543 - I'm in. - In on what? 269 00:24:34,543 --> 00:24:36,293 Teach me. 270 00:24:37,418 --> 00:24:40,668 - It'll be hectic. - And painful. 271 00:24:40,668 --> 00:24:46,126 Nagging, grumpy neighbors, hangovers... It'll be legendary! 272 00:24:46,126 --> 00:24:51,876 Are you ready to become a charming asshole that girls want to sleep with? 273 00:24:51,876 --> 00:24:54,043 You bet your ass! 274 00:24:54,584 --> 00:24:59,084 - Ouch! Shit! - We are a low caste, but we rebel. 275 00:24:59,084 --> 00:25:03,626 The Oslo and Surrounding Area Fucking Caste. 276 00:25:04,376 --> 00:25:06,543 One day, Chris... 277 00:25:06,543 --> 00:25:09,626 One day this will all be yours. 278 00:25:18,043 --> 00:25:21,668 - The first girl you had sex with? - Susann. 279 00:25:21,668 --> 00:25:25,251 - We had sex on a slope. - Susann. 280 00:25:25,251 --> 00:25:30,251 - She screwed Terje the same night. - Fuck her. She's probably obese now. 281 00:25:30,251 --> 00:25:34,626 The second time, are you sure there was full penetration? 282 00:25:34,626 --> 00:25:37,126 Pretty sure. I think. 283 00:25:37,126 --> 00:25:41,043 The head of your penis inside at least once? 284 00:25:41,043 --> 00:25:44,251 - I'm pretty sure it was. - Pimp! 285 00:25:49,501 --> 00:25:52,126 That's pretty impressive. 286 00:25:52,126 --> 00:25:57,709 Don't worry. By New Year's you'll be way up here. 287 00:25:57,709 --> 00:26:02,709 - I can guarantee at least five. - Three more? In three months? 288 00:26:02,709 --> 00:26:08,043 Before New Year's you'll be at five and I'll be at 123. 289 00:26:11,668 --> 00:26:13,751 What's on your mind? 290 00:26:14,376 --> 00:26:19,959 This may sound stupid, but what happened to just "being yourself"? 291 00:26:21,626 --> 00:26:26,418 OK, Chris, your mother raised you to be nice and sweet. 292 00:26:26,918 --> 00:26:32,834 And worst of all, to be yourself. What if "yourself" isn't good enough? 293 00:26:32,834 --> 00:26:37,709 What if "yourself" is a boring, ugly nerd? 294 00:26:37,709 --> 00:26:41,293 If you smell bad, take a shower. 295 00:26:41,293 --> 00:26:45,501 If there's a dead whore in your living room, get rid of her. 296 00:26:45,501 --> 00:26:48,543 Adaptation is as natural as evolution. 297 00:26:48,543 --> 00:26:55,001 "Yourself" is a term for losers who sit at home whacking off. Agreed? 298 00:26:55,001 --> 00:26:57,293 - Yes. - Pimp. 299 00:26:58,084 --> 00:27:00,001 For starters: 300 00:27:00,001 --> 00:27:05,168 It's essential that you control every social situation. 301 00:27:05,543 --> 00:27:10,876 It helps if you're wealthy or have a magical penis like Leo, - 302 00:27:10,876 --> 00:27:15,293 - but all it comes down to is how you communicate. 303 00:27:15,293 --> 00:27:21,334 Most girls think that a set number of boys are their perfect match. 304 00:27:21,334 --> 00:27:25,126 And that's fine. We can take advantage of that. 305 00:27:25,126 --> 00:27:31,501 Get as close to her physically as possible, without it being awkward. 306 00:27:31,501 --> 00:27:37,459 You're a little too close to Leo now, but look how close I am to you. 307 00:27:37,459 --> 00:27:41,751 With indirect body language, I can get much closer. 308 00:27:41,751 --> 00:27:46,459 But what if I go like this? "Hey, can I buy you a drink?" 309 00:27:46,459 --> 00:27:50,751 - Touch everyone, even boys. - You mean grope? 310 00:27:50,751 --> 00:27:55,084 No, don't grope. Create physical closeness. 311 00:27:55,084 --> 00:27:58,251 Always touch them in a natural manner. 312 00:27:58,251 --> 00:28:01,959 She'll never want you to play with her pussy, - 313 00:28:01,959 --> 00:28:06,584 - unless you've played with her arms and shoulders first. 314 00:28:07,209 --> 00:28:13,126 Analyze who they are with. All other boys are considered enemies. 315 00:28:13,126 --> 00:28:17,293 More on that later. What do you see over there? 316 00:28:17,293 --> 00:28:19,043 - Two girls. - Wrong. 317 00:28:19,043 --> 00:28:22,501 A hot girl with an ugly girlfriend. 318 00:28:27,751 --> 00:28:30,543 Ready? What's she look like? 319 00:28:30,543 --> 00:28:33,709 Huh? Right. She has a white shirt... 320 00:28:33,709 --> 00:28:36,751 Wrong! She's naked on top of you! 321 00:28:50,751 --> 00:28:55,001 Hi, you look great! How's it going? 322 00:28:55,001 --> 00:28:57,084 How do you know Karl? 323 00:28:57,084 --> 00:28:58,751 Who? 324 00:29:04,251 --> 00:29:09,376 Three-second rule: Talk to someone you like within three seconds. 325 00:29:09,376 --> 00:29:13,668 - What should I say? - It's all about the delivery. 326 00:29:17,334 --> 00:29:21,918 Hi! This is my roommate. The coolest guy in the world. 327 00:29:21,918 --> 00:29:23,459 Hi. Tove. 328 00:29:23,459 --> 00:29:28,001 Tove is a nurse, but she's terrified of shots. 329 00:29:28,001 --> 00:29:29,751 Cool! 330 00:29:33,043 --> 00:29:36,209 So...why are you so afraid of shots? 331 00:29:38,459 --> 00:29:42,251 I probably got scared when I was a kid, or something. 332 00:29:42,251 --> 00:29:45,918 - We aren't actually roommates. - Who? 333 00:29:45,918 --> 00:29:48,751 Me and... Me and Karl. 334 00:29:48,751 --> 00:29:53,793 I mean, we live together. In the same apartment. 335 00:29:54,418 --> 00:29:58,709 That is, I moved in. From Stavanger. 336 00:29:58,876 --> 00:30:01,626 You have beautiful eyes. 337 00:30:02,126 --> 00:30:04,001 Thank you. 338 00:30:04,001 --> 00:30:06,376 I'm a little thirsty. 339 00:30:09,793 --> 00:30:12,459 - What would you like? - Strawberry daiquiri. 340 00:30:12,459 --> 00:30:15,459 One strawberry daggery. 341 00:30:16,043 --> 00:30:20,834 I was wondering. Could I have your phone number? 342 00:30:20,834 --> 00:30:24,001 - I don't know... - You have a boyfriend? 343 00:30:24,001 --> 00:30:25,626 - No. - You don't? 344 00:30:27,001 --> 00:30:28,709 Come on. 345 00:30:29,126 --> 00:30:30,918 Let's have it. 346 00:30:35,668 --> 00:30:37,501 But... 347 00:30:37,501 --> 00:30:43,084 I have to work early tomorrow. I should probably get going. 348 00:30:47,376 --> 00:30:51,876 - What was that? - A free drink and some attention. 349 00:30:51,876 --> 00:30:54,918 - Never start by buying them a drink. - I didn't! 350 00:30:54,918 --> 00:30:56,293 You did. 351 00:30:56,293 --> 00:31:01,418 She just lumped you together with the rest of the goats. 352 00:31:01,418 --> 00:31:06,043 You elevated her way above you. She should buy you a drink. 353 00:31:08,751 --> 00:31:10,918 - How did it go? - I got her number. 354 00:31:10,918 --> 00:31:12,918 Let me see! 355 00:31:16,251 --> 00:31:19,543 What did you do? What should I say? 356 00:31:19,543 --> 00:31:22,793 Say hi. Invite her up here, or something. 357 00:31:22,793 --> 00:31:24,543 Hello? 358 00:31:27,084 --> 00:31:30,793 - What happened? - It was an old folks' home. 359 00:31:30,793 --> 00:31:35,501 - It was the night watchman. - Don't worry about it. 360 00:31:35,918 --> 00:31:39,918 She's a nurse. It was probably her work number. 361 00:31:50,043 --> 00:31:54,918 Holy crap, Karl! You still have your dildo collection? 362 00:31:54,918 --> 00:31:57,209 I told you I did. 363 00:31:57,209 --> 00:32:01,168 This is Nils. This is Johnny, who resembles Leo's. 364 00:32:01,168 --> 00:32:04,209 Flicky, and Big Jim. 365 00:32:05,334 --> 00:32:07,168 Perfect. 366 00:32:13,168 --> 00:32:16,834 Leo's about to fuck that girl. 367 00:32:16,834 --> 00:32:20,543 Hearing other people have sex makes chicks horny. 368 00:32:20,543 --> 00:32:23,459 That's when we strike. I'll take Guro. 369 00:32:23,459 --> 00:32:27,334 That Filipino chick goes crazy once she's naked. 370 00:32:27,334 --> 00:32:28,959 Or so I've heard. 371 00:32:28,959 --> 00:32:31,251 - Are you in? - Sure. 372 00:32:37,251 --> 00:32:39,126 Here we go! 373 00:33:22,251 --> 00:33:26,209 Imagine if we ended up on a desert island. 374 00:33:26,209 --> 00:33:31,168 That would suck. I have to leave now. See you later. 375 00:33:41,001 --> 00:33:46,459 - How long before you go over to her? - Three seconds tops. 376 00:33:46,459 --> 00:33:49,043 And if she asks for a drink? 377 00:33:49,043 --> 00:33:53,084 Politely decline, and try to get her to buy me one. 378 00:33:53,084 --> 00:33:57,293 Excellent. We've fed you a lot of information. 379 00:33:57,293 --> 00:34:02,251 All that's important now, is that you're totally relaxed. 380 00:34:21,751 --> 00:34:24,334 - Hi! - Hi. 381 00:34:40,876 --> 00:34:44,001 - Sorry. - Don't worry about it. 382 00:34:44,001 --> 00:34:47,001 I didn't know what to say. 383 00:34:49,043 --> 00:34:51,543 - Hi, I'm Leo. - Hi, Leo. 384 00:34:51,543 --> 00:34:55,501 - Have you met Christian? - Hi. Christian. 385 00:34:55,501 --> 00:34:58,793 We went to music kindergarten together. 386 00:34:58,793 --> 00:35:03,668 He's the only person I know who plays rhythm sticks off-key. 387 00:35:03,668 --> 00:35:05,334 Feed the goat. 388 00:35:05,334 --> 00:35:10,126 Leo played this little mini guitar while I sang. 389 00:35:10,126 --> 00:35:15,209 The kindergarten teachers threw their bras at us. 390 00:35:15,209 --> 00:35:18,793 - What did you want to become? - A stewardess. 391 00:35:27,209 --> 00:35:30,418 - What was that? - That can happen to anyone. 392 00:35:30,418 --> 00:35:31,918 What do I do now? 393 00:35:35,959 --> 00:35:39,126 - Fuck it. Take her back. - Are you nuts? 394 00:35:39,126 --> 00:35:43,834 Trust me. Just go right over there and kiss her. 395 00:35:43,834 --> 00:35:47,543 - Are you sure... - Shut up. Go for the kiss. 396 00:36:03,501 --> 00:36:08,084 What the hell do you think you're doing, snail dick? 397 00:36:10,918 --> 00:36:12,834 Good work, boss! 398 00:36:17,418 --> 00:36:19,418 What the hell? 399 00:36:20,459 --> 00:36:26,043 - Hang on, let me kill this faggot. - He's with me. I told him to do it. 400 00:36:26,043 --> 00:36:28,668 Really? Nice to meet you. 401 00:36:29,543 --> 00:36:32,751 I'm The Punisher. Let's get a drink. 402 00:36:37,959 --> 00:36:40,376 Karl may seem cynical. 403 00:36:40,834 --> 00:36:46,209 But compared to The Punisher he's a study in refined style. 404 00:36:46,209 --> 00:36:52,293 That goat has a constant hard-on. He won't stop until he gets laid. 405 00:36:53,251 --> 00:36:56,376 And when he eventually does score, - 406 00:36:56,376 --> 00:37:00,084 - he always tries to butt-fuck the girl. 407 00:37:00,084 --> 00:37:03,834 He feels they deserve it for playing hard to get. 408 00:37:03,834 --> 00:37:06,959 Thus the name, The Punisher. 409 00:37:11,793 --> 00:37:14,126 It's a fucking war out there. 410 00:37:14,126 --> 00:37:16,084 A war? 411 00:37:16,084 --> 00:37:18,084 - Hi there! - Hi! 412 00:37:18,084 --> 00:37:21,043 It's great to see you again. 413 00:37:21,043 --> 00:37:24,418 Last time was a little embarrassing. 414 00:37:24,418 --> 00:37:28,251 You have nothing to be embarrassed about. 415 00:37:28,251 --> 00:37:32,501 But you did propose to me, so we are engaged. 416 00:37:33,084 --> 00:37:35,043 You said yes? 417 00:37:35,043 --> 00:37:38,668 Nyah. I said I'd think about it. 418 00:37:38,668 --> 00:37:42,376 - Hi. Good to see you again. - Hi! 419 00:37:42,376 --> 00:37:45,626 - Hi. Line. - Hi. Kine. 420 00:37:45,626 --> 00:37:48,709 - Kine and Trine? - Kine and Line. 421 00:37:48,709 --> 00:37:50,876 Gotta keep my dick straight. 422 00:40:32,709 --> 00:40:34,459 Hey... 423 00:40:35,709 --> 00:40:37,834 Is it OK if we just... 424 00:40:37,834 --> 00:40:40,293 Sure. Of course. 425 00:41:43,668 --> 00:41:49,001 I'm not the type to stick my finger up girls' asses on the dance floor. 426 00:41:49,001 --> 00:41:53,043 The Punisher's just messing around. 427 00:41:53,043 --> 00:41:58,751 Why do girls go home with cavemen who use their dicks like clubs? 428 00:41:59,209 --> 00:42:00,959 I don't get it. 429 00:42:01,918 --> 00:42:05,668 Aren't you working on a degree in sociology? 430 00:42:05,668 --> 00:42:09,668 You're the scholar here. Figure it out. 431 00:42:23,834 --> 00:42:26,251 Equal rights in Noray 432 00:42:45,084 --> 00:42:47,793 "My Crack, Back & Shaven Sack. " 433 00:42:47,793 --> 00:42:51,584 "The division of power between the sexes - 434 00:42:51,584 --> 00:42:54,293 - in today's post-feminist society." 435 00:42:54,293 --> 00:42:59,918 - What's it about? - It's about living in Norway in 2013. 436 00:43:00,959 --> 00:43:02,459 With a penis. 437 00:43:03,501 --> 00:43:05,459 Is that a bad thing? 438 00:43:05,459 --> 00:43:10,293 In Norway today, women live five years longer than men. 439 00:43:10,293 --> 00:43:13,584 Nine out of ten jail inmates are men. 440 00:43:13,584 --> 00:43:17,418 Three of four suicides. We have military service. 441 00:43:17,418 --> 00:43:22,751 Men are overrepresented when it comes to accidents, drowning, - 442 00:43:22,751 --> 00:43:24,918 - drunkenness, depression. 443 00:43:24,918 --> 00:43:29,418 In nine of ten divorces, the women get the children. 444 00:43:29,418 --> 00:43:33,584 Women get better grades than men in 90 % of courses. 445 00:43:33,584 --> 00:43:37,834 And women have all the power in the gender market. 446 00:43:37,834 --> 00:43:43,751 - We were oppressed for 60,000 years. - But I'm talking about today. 447 00:43:44,334 --> 00:43:48,584 - So now you're the oppressed ones? - Yes. 448 00:43:48,584 --> 00:43:53,001 Everyone can see it, but women are still portrayed as the victims. 449 00:43:53,001 --> 00:43:56,459 Just because there are fewer female leaders. 450 00:43:56,459 --> 00:43:58,709 So why are fewer leaders female? 451 00:43:58,709 --> 00:44:05,584 Because being the CEO of Statoil is a shit job that no one really wants. 452 00:44:05,584 --> 00:44:08,751 Unless you're a narcissistic bastard that loves pussy. 453 00:44:08,751 --> 00:44:10,793 - And money. - And power. 454 00:44:10,793 --> 00:44:14,043 And what do you use that money and power for? 455 00:44:14,043 --> 00:44:18,459 To drink champagne out of the ass of some hot heiress. 456 00:44:18,459 --> 00:44:23,709 I'm not sure it's as lopsided as you make it sound. 457 00:44:23,709 --> 00:44:27,543 Chris, tonight I'm taking you to Nirvana. 458 00:44:40,209 --> 00:44:45,751 Are we picking up lesbians? This place is full of homos. 459 00:44:45,751 --> 00:44:50,626 Relax. Savor the atmosphere. How many desperate men do you see? 460 00:44:50,626 --> 00:44:55,834 How many grumpy girls yelling at some guy for making a move? 461 00:44:57,876 --> 00:45:02,584 - I've never been to a gay bar. - You're treated like a human here. 462 00:45:02,584 --> 00:45:05,876 It's a great place to hang out and relax. 463 00:45:05,876 --> 00:45:10,043 Here, any one man is worth as much as another. 464 00:45:11,834 --> 00:45:13,543 Look at that guy. 465 00:45:14,626 --> 00:45:19,834 Jesus, another ten shots, and he could have me fooled. 466 00:45:21,501 --> 00:45:25,043 Have you ever done it? With a man? 467 00:45:26,376 --> 00:45:28,876 It isn't my cup of tea. 468 00:45:28,876 --> 00:45:30,751 - How about you? - Right! 469 00:45:31,376 --> 00:45:35,584 I'm 24 years old and have had sex with two women. 470 00:45:35,584 --> 00:45:40,459 I'm due a little more pussy before I switch to cock and ass. 471 00:45:40,459 --> 00:45:42,626 Did I hear "ass"? 472 00:45:44,543 --> 00:45:47,293 - Mind if we join you? - Not at all! 473 00:45:49,626 --> 00:45:53,001 Ten shots. You said ten shots. 474 00:45:55,043 --> 00:45:57,834 - Cheers! - Cumshots! 475 00:46:02,876 --> 00:46:05,084 OK! Hang on... 476 00:46:05,084 --> 00:46:08,918 Christian, bring those two girls home. 477 00:46:08,918 --> 00:46:13,668 Can't we just pretend like we're gay tonight? 478 00:46:13,668 --> 00:46:17,001 - Not a chance. Go! - Christian! 479 00:46:17,709 --> 00:46:20,793 Hi, excuse me for interrupting. 480 00:46:20,793 --> 00:46:26,834 Could I just stand here and pretend like I'm picking you up? 481 00:46:26,834 --> 00:46:31,418 Just until my friend is satisfied? He won't stop nagging. 482 00:46:31,418 --> 00:46:33,626 - Of course. - Cool. 483 00:46:34,668 --> 00:46:38,626 Quite the pressure. Could I bum a cigarette? 484 00:46:38,626 --> 00:46:42,126 - Where are we going now? - My place! 485 00:46:42,126 --> 00:46:45,418 - Isn't he coming? - No, he has things to do. 486 00:46:45,418 --> 00:46:47,043 How old are you? 487 00:46:47,043 --> 00:46:48,751 58. 488 00:46:48,751 --> 00:46:50,584 And you? 489 00:46:50,584 --> 00:46:53,209 - What do you think? - 16. 490 00:47:35,251 --> 00:47:37,459 - Hi. - Shh! 491 00:47:39,793 --> 00:47:43,043 - Are you in here? - Who is that? 492 00:47:45,543 --> 00:47:47,459 Hi. I'm Christian. 493 00:47:49,376 --> 00:47:53,209 Have you eaten? Why don't I make breakfast? 494 00:47:53,209 --> 00:47:54,918 No, I'm fine. 495 00:47:55,543 --> 00:47:59,751 Where are the car keys, mom? I'm meeting Kaja. 496 00:47:59,751 --> 00:48:03,334 - You can drive Christian home. - Seriously? 497 00:48:03,334 --> 00:48:06,626 No, really. Don't worry about me. 498 00:48:06,626 --> 00:48:10,043 - It's the least we can do. - I'll take the tram. 499 00:48:31,668 --> 00:48:34,793 - Talk to me. - What? 500 00:48:34,793 --> 00:48:38,001 No bullshit. Have you fucked? 501 00:48:42,459 --> 00:48:44,209 Yes! 502 00:48:46,126 --> 00:48:47,501 Fuck! 503 00:48:54,001 --> 00:48:56,459 What the hell is going on? 504 00:49:00,001 --> 00:49:03,084 - Did you get laid? - Like a madman! 505 00:49:03,084 --> 00:49:06,376 - She was pretty old. - Shut up! Women age like wine! 506 00:49:06,376 --> 00:49:09,168 I'm proud of you. Well done. 507 00:49:09,876 --> 00:49:13,209 Chris, stand up. Stand up! 508 00:49:15,293 --> 00:49:19,834 I hereby appoint you as Oslo Fuck Club's - 509 00:49:19,834 --> 00:49:23,084 - first official Big Cat. 510 00:49:24,876 --> 00:49:26,876 For the one of us who, - 511 00:49:26,876 --> 00:49:30,959 - at any given time, last fucked a new chick. 512 00:49:34,209 --> 00:49:36,126 OK, fuck it. 513 00:49:36,126 --> 00:49:39,959 You have been fantastic. You too, Leo. 514 00:49:39,959 --> 00:49:45,709 I'll admit it. I've been holding back. But that's over now. 515 00:49:45,709 --> 00:49:52,001 Now it's all about cock, pussy, S&M in the woods and fucking lesbians. 516 00:49:52,001 --> 00:49:54,543 Try stopping me, Middle Cat. 517 00:49:54,543 --> 00:49:57,168 - Burn! - Shut up, Baby Cat! 518 00:49:57,168 --> 00:49:59,168 Come on. Maja! 519 00:49:59,584 --> 00:50:01,751 Maja! 520 00:50:02,959 --> 00:50:07,251 - Time for a party! - I'll kill your whole family, Karl! 521 00:50:07,751 --> 00:50:12,584 OK. We have six hours to organize the party of the year. 522 00:50:12,584 --> 00:50:15,834 The mother-in-law of all parties. 523 00:50:15,834 --> 00:50:20,876 Chris, you have to find as much alcohol as you possibly can. 524 00:50:20,876 --> 00:50:26,959 Leo, you handle the crazy shit. Here's my card, don't tell me what you buy. 525 00:50:26,959 --> 00:50:33,501 Maja, you call every girl you have ever met in the surrounding area. 526 00:50:33,501 --> 00:50:37,001 - You know more than I do. - He's fucked 90 % of them. 527 00:50:37,001 --> 00:50:40,918 It would be kind of like Hefner, partying with girls you've screwed. 528 00:50:40,918 --> 00:50:44,043 - Fine, we both score chicks. - Fuck you. 529 00:50:44,043 --> 00:50:46,751 - Excellent. - Maja? 530 00:50:46,751 --> 00:50:50,793 - What if we don't feed the goat? - It gets hungry. 531 00:50:50,793 --> 00:50:52,418 Feed the goat! 532 00:51:25,501 --> 00:51:29,293 - You should get a jacuzzi. - More champagne? 533 00:51:31,584 --> 00:51:33,459 - Hi. - Hi. 534 00:51:36,293 --> 00:51:39,043 I was invited, if... 535 00:51:39,043 --> 00:51:41,584 Of course, no problem. 536 00:51:41,584 --> 00:51:46,001 As long as it's been cleared by the goat. 537 00:51:46,001 --> 00:51:49,168 So... It's good to see you. 538 00:51:49,168 --> 00:51:51,334 Likewise. 539 00:51:51,334 --> 00:51:55,918 - You want something to drink? - I brought my own. 540 00:51:57,668 --> 00:51:59,584 Dick or sack? 541 00:51:59,584 --> 00:52:02,084 - Huh? - Dick or sack? 542 00:52:07,334 --> 00:52:09,334 Sack? 543 00:52:09,334 --> 00:52:11,626 Wrong. It was dick. 544 00:52:12,459 --> 00:52:18,793 I thought you of all people would recognize a dick when you saw one. 545 00:53:06,751 --> 00:53:10,751 Hey, maybe it's time to start calming down? 546 00:53:10,751 --> 00:53:14,209 The goat needs to be fed. It needs to. 547 00:53:14,209 --> 00:53:17,459 Or else the SPCA will get mad at us - 548 00:53:17,459 --> 00:53:21,251 - and all hell will break loose. We don't want that. 549 00:54:35,834 --> 00:54:37,584 Sorry! 550 00:54:42,584 --> 00:54:44,418 Listen... 551 00:54:45,251 --> 00:54:47,459 I should leave now. 552 00:54:47,459 --> 00:54:50,084 Do you want to walk me out? 553 00:54:50,084 --> 00:54:53,084 I just have to say bye to Maja. 554 00:54:53,084 --> 00:54:56,668 Thanks for tonight. It was awesome. 555 00:55:09,126 --> 00:55:14,043 I think it's best for everyone if I go home with you. 556 00:56:43,334 --> 00:56:45,126 Hello! 557 00:56:47,876 --> 00:56:51,668 How are things here? Did I wake you up? 558 00:56:54,626 --> 00:56:57,668 Were you at a party last night? 559 00:57:05,459 --> 00:57:09,126 All right, bye. See you on Sunday. 560 00:57:31,209 --> 00:57:33,126 There you go. 561 00:57:35,626 --> 00:57:37,543 What's your name? 562 00:57:37,543 --> 00:57:39,209 Mads, was it? 563 00:57:40,168 --> 00:57:42,084 Mads is a super name. 564 00:57:43,126 --> 00:57:45,126 How old are you? 565 00:57:46,543 --> 00:57:48,501 How old are you? 566 00:57:48,501 --> 00:57:49,918 One? 567 00:57:49,918 --> 00:57:52,959 - Answer Christian. - Two? 568 00:57:52,959 --> 00:57:55,501 You don't have to answer. 569 00:57:56,668 --> 00:57:58,418 Hello! 570 00:57:59,334 --> 00:58:01,084 Hello! 571 00:58:09,543 --> 00:58:11,376 You just spilled some. 572 00:58:46,751 --> 00:58:51,209 My first draft is due in early December. 573 00:58:55,459 --> 00:58:57,168 Yeah. 574 00:58:58,751 --> 00:59:01,334 No, that didn't work out. 575 00:59:04,334 --> 00:59:07,543 She ended up in bed with Karl. 576 00:59:08,959 --> 00:59:14,668 No, it wasn't like that. They didn't even know who the other one was. 577 00:59:14,668 --> 00:59:17,168 No, mom. It isn't... 578 00:59:17,168 --> 00:59:20,543 He doesn't even know her name. 579 00:59:20,543 --> 00:59:23,334 Stop. It's no big deal. 580 00:59:23,751 --> 00:59:27,126 Anyway, I have met someone else. 581 00:59:28,168 --> 00:59:31,001 Yeah. Her name is Elisa. 582 00:59:31,501 --> 00:59:33,418 So that's... 583 00:59:33,418 --> 00:59:36,668 Yes, she's very cool. A very cool girl. 584 00:59:42,751 --> 00:59:45,043 Hey, Karl, come here. 585 00:59:48,501 --> 00:59:50,834 - That looks great. - What? 586 00:59:50,834 --> 00:59:54,168 You coming out with us tonight? 587 00:59:54,168 --> 00:59:56,751 Elisa and I are meeting Maja. 588 00:59:56,751 --> 01:00:01,084 You've been hanging out for weeks. Are you an item? 589 01:00:01,501 --> 01:00:03,626 - I don't know. - What's that mean? 590 01:00:03,626 --> 01:00:07,626 It means we enjoy each other's company. 591 01:00:07,626 --> 01:00:10,709 Does it have to be more complicated? 592 01:00:11,168 --> 01:00:14,126 - Are you her boyfriend now? - No. 593 01:00:14,126 --> 01:00:19,626 - You're just getting the hang of this. - You need at least one more. 594 01:00:20,293 --> 01:00:25,376 Why get continually rejected, when I can have fun with Elisa? 595 01:00:25,376 --> 01:00:28,751 OK, I have a plan. Bring Elisa, - 596 01:00:28,751 --> 01:00:32,126 - and score a threesome. She'll be game. 597 01:00:33,209 --> 01:00:38,584 I don't think she's into that. And she has her kid this weekend. 598 01:00:39,001 --> 01:00:41,959 - Elisa has a kid? - How old? 599 01:00:41,959 --> 01:00:43,834 Two, maybe? 600 01:00:44,418 --> 01:00:46,251 Whew! 601 01:00:48,709 --> 01:00:50,418 What? 602 01:00:50,876 --> 01:00:52,334 Hm? 603 01:00:54,376 --> 01:00:56,043 Have you... 604 01:00:57,126 --> 01:00:58,418 When? 605 01:00:58,418 --> 01:01:01,876 Christ, it was like four years ago. 606 01:01:01,876 --> 01:01:06,334 - It was at this crazy after-party. - You too? 607 01:01:06,334 --> 01:01:09,334 We were wasted, or stoned. 608 01:01:09,334 --> 01:01:12,459 It was no big deal. It was just for kicks. 609 01:01:12,459 --> 01:01:17,626 So you and Leo fucked Elisa at the same time? 610 01:01:17,626 --> 01:01:21,584 - Was anyone else involved? - No, just us. 611 01:01:21,584 --> 01:01:27,418 - But, shit, she's smoking hot! - It was just some drunken fun. 612 01:01:38,834 --> 01:01:43,793 She would probably have told you if she wanted you to know. 613 01:01:43,793 --> 01:01:48,751 "By the way, your buddies double-penetrated my ass." 614 01:01:48,751 --> 01:01:54,626 "But I'm done with that now. Let's do it the normal way." 615 01:01:54,626 --> 01:01:56,376 Come on, Christian! 616 01:01:56,376 --> 01:02:01,959 Let's go find the lesbian national yoga team and have an eightsome. 617 01:02:29,834 --> 01:02:32,918 How many have you had sex with? 618 01:02:34,418 --> 01:02:37,918 What kind of a question is that? 619 01:02:37,918 --> 01:02:40,376 I'm just curious. 620 01:02:40,376 --> 01:02:42,001 OK. 621 01:02:43,584 --> 01:02:45,459 34, I think. 622 01:02:46,168 --> 01:02:49,168 Or 33. Something like that. 623 01:02:52,543 --> 01:02:55,876 Have you ever been in a threesome? 624 01:02:55,876 --> 01:02:59,043 Why are you asking me that? 625 01:03:03,251 --> 01:03:07,876 Over there, isn't that that girl you made out with? 626 01:03:09,168 --> 01:03:11,418 Maybe she could join us? 627 01:03:15,501 --> 01:03:19,834 Christ! I thought you were serious for a second. 628 01:03:19,834 --> 01:03:21,793 What do you mean? 629 01:03:22,918 --> 01:03:25,459 What, are you serious? 630 01:03:29,293 --> 01:03:31,543 - OK. - OK? 631 01:03:31,543 --> 01:03:35,251 - So you're up for it? - Yeah, sure. 632 01:03:35,251 --> 01:03:37,001 I don't know. 633 01:03:37,793 --> 01:03:39,543 Or... 634 01:03:39,959 --> 01:03:41,709 No. 635 01:03:42,793 --> 01:03:44,793 Why not? 636 01:03:44,793 --> 01:03:46,418 Because... 637 01:03:46,418 --> 01:03:49,251 Because I don't want to. 638 01:03:53,709 --> 01:03:56,126 How about a foursome? 639 01:03:57,709 --> 01:04:02,668 We can bring in Karl and Leo and all fuck together. 640 01:04:08,168 --> 01:04:09,709 Listen... 641 01:04:09,709 --> 01:04:13,334 That happened ages ago, Christian. 642 01:04:14,334 --> 01:04:19,084 - Why are you being like this? - Like what? 643 01:04:19,084 --> 01:04:23,293 - Like a guy who's into threesomes? - I don't want to. 644 01:04:23,293 --> 01:04:26,709 Why don't you ask how many I have slept with? 645 01:04:27,209 --> 01:04:30,751 - You know there aren't many. - I don't care! 646 01:04:30,751 --> 01:04:35,709 - Why didn't you say something? - I didn't see it as a problem. 647 01:04:35,709 --> 01:04:37,876 This is so typical! 648 01:04:37,876 --> 01:04:42,126 Karl and Leo can fuck around because they're men, but I'm a woman... 649 01:04:42,126 --> 01:04:47,959 I'm not talking about what you have done. I'm talking about us. 650 01:04:48,459 --> 01:04:51,626 You're trying to force me into a fuck orgy! 651 01:04:51,626 --> 01:04:57,293 Fine, since you're beyond all that, let's move in together. 652 01:04:57,293 --> 01:05:02,918 And I can be Mads' substitute dad, since he's so crazy about me! 653 01:05:09,168 --> 01:05:11,168 Don't call me. 654 01:09:58,959 --> 01:10:00,459 Out you go. 655 01:10:04,709 --> 01:10:08,209 You and Kevin Danielsen were arrested. 656 01:10:09,418 --> 01:10:13,584 Kevin who? I don't know a Kevin Danielsen. 657 01:10:13,584 --> 01:10:15,959 You called him - 658 01:10:15,959 --> 01:10:20,209 - The Punisher last night. Do you know him, or not? 659 01:10:20,209 --> 01:10:21,876 I do. 660 01:10:21,876 --> 01:10:28,876 You have been charged with violating Penal Code section 192-A: 661 01:10:28,876 --> 01:10:33,126 "Sexual intercourse accomplished by violence or menace." 662 01:10:33,126 --> 01:10:36,501 "Punishable by up to 10 years in prison." 663 01:10:36,501 --> 01:10:41,751 I suggest you get yourself a lawyer. You will be released... 664 01:11:34,876 --> 01:11:37,334 - Karl! - I told you so! 665 01:11:38,251 --> 01:11:39,959 Up you go! 666 01:11:39,959 --> 01:11:42,793 You doubted your cock. 667 01:11:42,793 --> 01:11:46,959 But you've just fucked with that cock, haven't you? 668 01:11:49,126 --> 01:11:53,584 Five chicks, and it isn't even Christmas yet. Damn I'm good! 669 01:11:53,584 --> 01:11:57,793 You've become a goddam fucking machine! 670 01:11:57,793 --> 01:12:00,376 I have to go get laid. 671 01:12:19,001 --> 01:12:20,834 Christian? 672 01:12:23,084 --> 01:12:25,543 Yes. 673 01:12:25,543 --> 01:12:28,043 - Sandwich? - Excuse me? 674 01:12:28,043 --> 01:12:32,084 - Would you like a sandwich? - No, thanks. 675 01:12:33,418 --> 01:12:36,418 I've looked at what you gave me. 676 01:12:37,001 --> 01:12:42,376 - This shouldn't be a problem. - OK. What does that mean? 677 01:12:42,376 --> 01:12:46,793 That means they don't have enough evidence. 678 01:12:46,793 --> 01:12:50,834 So you'll probably get off scot-free. 679 01:12:52,751 --> 01:12:55,709 What if they do have enough evidence? 680 01:12:55,709 --> 01:12:58,709 Then you risk some years in the slammer. 681 01:12:59,293 --> 01:13:03,168 Or a fine. Depending on what they find. 682 01:13:03,709 --> 01:13:06,043 Sure you don't want a sandwich? 683 01:13:35,168 --> 01:13:38,293 Aren't you going to eat? 684 01:13:38,293 --> 01:13:41,001 No, I'm not that hungry. 685 01:13:41,001 --> 01:13:44,459 - Are you sick? - No, I'm not sick. 686 01:13:46,501 --> 01:13:48,501 You look sick. 687 01:13:48,501 --> 01:13:53,751 It's called a hangover. That's a grown-up sickness. 688 01:13:55,501 --> 01:13:58,709 How's it going with the ladies? 689 01:14:00,293 --> 01:14:02,334 Fine, I guess. 690 01:14:02,334 --> 01:14:04,751 Do you have a girlfriend? 691 01:14:04,751 --> 01:14:06,543 - No. - Why not? 692 01:14:08,459 --> 01:14:11,293 Leave Christian alone now. 693 01:14:18,584 --> 01:14:21,501 Hey, how are you really doing? 694 01:14:22,959 --> 01:14:26,084 I'm fine. Just have a lot on my mind. 695 01:14:26,793 --> 01:14:29,751 - I'm very proud of you. - Stop it. 696 01:14:29,751 --> 01:14:34,084 I mean it. You've always been such a sweet boy. 697 01:14:34,084 --> 01:14:39,501 No matter what you do, I will always be proud of you. 698 01:14:42,834 --> 01:14:48,501 But listen, if something has happened, you have to be honest. 699 01:14:48,501 --> 01:14:51,668 Then everything will work out. 700 01:14:51,668 --> 01:14:53,918 - Duly noted. - OK? 701 01:14:57,834 --> 01:15:00,959 Good night. Sleep tight. 702 01:15:20,543 --> 01:15:22,251 Hey! 703 01:15:22,876 --> 01:15:26,043 Hi, it's you. I thought... 704 01:15:26,043 --> 01:15:29,251 Never mind. I've been thinking. 705 01:15:29,251 --> 01:15:31,584 - About what? - My case. 706 01:15:31,584 --> 01:15:34,418 Shit, I forgot to tell you! 707 01:15:34,418 --> 01:15:37,084 I got a call a few days ago. 708 01:15:37,084 --> 01:15:40,043 All the charges have been dropped. 709 01:15:40,043 --> 01:15:44,376 She wasn't up for a full trial. I told you so. 710 01:15:44,376 --> 01:15:48,043 - But I want... - It's very common. 711 01:15:54,959 --> 01:15:57,459 I want to confess. 712 01:15:57,459 --> 01:16:01,418 - Why? - Because I can't live with this. 713 01:16:06,834 --> 01:16:11,334 Listen, she said she doesn't want any more attention. 714 01:16:11,334 --> 01:16:17,543 The police have to drop a rape case if there's no victim. Case closed. 715 01:16:17,543 --> 01:16:23,418 Don't force her to do something she doesn't want to do. Again. 716 01:16:24,334 --> 01:16:25,626 OK? 717 01:16:26,334 --> 01:16:29,459 Put it behind you, Christian. 718 01:16:29,459 --> 01:16:31,543 Happy New Year. 719 01:16:54,251 --> 01:16:56,043 Christian? 720 01:16:56,043 --> 01:16:59,251 Can't you come out? We miss you. 721 01:17:23,126 --> 01:17:25,084 Hi! 722 01:17:25,084 --> 01:17:26,543 What's this? 723 01:17:28,418 --> 01:17:34,751 This is...a prioritized list of girls' names in case I get a daughter. 724 01:17:34,751 --> 01:17:39,626 - Are you going to be a dad? - I don't know. Maybe. 725 01:17:39,626 --> 01:17:43,501 You don't have Tone there. Mind if I add my name? 726 01:18:00,751 --> 01:18:02,084 Hi. 727 01:18:04,126 --> 01:18:05,709 Hi. 728 01:18:07,293 --> 01:18:09,251 How are you doing? 729 01:18:12,376 --> 01:18:13,668 I... 730 01:18:13,668 --> 01:18:15,543 Super. 731 01:18:24,709 --> 01:18:28,876 Has Karl told you how he lost his virginity? 732 01:18:30,334 --> 01:18:34,918 Up by Lake Sognsvann, with a girlfriend of mine. 733 01:18:34,918 --> 01:18:36,876 Sounds amazing... 734 01:18:38,001 --> 01:18:42,334 He didn't notice that his nose started bleeding. 735 01:18:42,334 --> 01:18:44,876 Her face ended up covered in blood. 736 01:18:45,251 --> 01:18:48,626 Number one: Nosebleed Ellen. 737 01:18:51,251 --> 01:18:53,209 Yeah. 738 01:18:53,376 --> 01:18:57,751 - It isn't easy. - You don't know the half of it. 739 01:19:00,709 --> 01:19:02,834 Here. 740 01:19:13,168 --> 01:19:15,209 - Is this Karl? - Yes. 741 01:19:15,918 --> 01:19:20,834 So he clearly knows what it feels like to be rejected. 742 01:19:26,126 --> 01:19:30,084 Listen, I know Karl can be a total pain. 743 01:19:31,043 --> 01:19:36,251 Personally, I've never been a fan of his womanizing. 744 01:19:37,793 --> 01:19:39,793 All those girls. 745 01:19:41,168 --> 01:19:46,001 But I let it slide because it has had a positive effect on him. 746 01:19:46,001 --> 01:19:50,626 That's because you're in love with him, Maja. 747 01:20:00,084 --> 01:20:01,918 Anyway... 748 01:20:04,168 --> 01:20:08,084 I know those guys can be intense and irritating. 749 01:20:08,084 --> 01:20:14,626 But staring at the ceiling and not talking to anyone, is also bad. 750 01:20:15,334 --> 01:20:18,209 If not for them, do it for me. 751 01:20:19,168 --> 01:20:23,709 I need someone to talk to out there with an IQ over 70. 752 01:20:27,459 --> 01:20:29,501 - Maja? - Hm? 753 01:20:37,376 --> 01:20:39,209 I have... 754 01:20:43,501 --> 01:20:46,668 Don't worry about it, Christian. 755 01:20:50,918 --> 01:20:54,918 Ladies and gentlemen, friends, and you there... 756 01:20:54,918 --> 01:20:57,751 I don't know you, but I like you. 757 01:20:57,751 --> 01:21:04,959 It's awesome that so many of you are still around after all our fuck-ups. 758 01:21:08,334 --> 01:21:15,084 But there is one person who has made this a fantastic year for me. 759 01:21:15,084 --> 01:21:20,209 One of my favorite people in the whole fucking world: 760 01:21:20,209 --> 01:21:22,043 Christian! 761 01:21:23,084 --> 01:21:26,918 He has changed my worldview - 762 01:21:26,918 --> 01:21:29,543 - with his naive kindness. 763 01:21:30,293 --> 01:21:35,084 And unbeknownst to him, he has helped me and Leo write a book - 764 01:21:35,084 --> 01:21:39,876 - that will hopefully help many desperate jerk-offs. 765 01:21:39,876 --> 01:21:43,376 He has been through a boot camp from hell - 766 01:21:43,376 --> 01:21:47,501 - that makes the special forces look like bitches. 767 01:21:47,501 --> 01:21:50,834 It's been hard, dark and miserable, - 768 01:21:50,834 --> 01:21:53,418 - but he rose to the occasion. 769 01:21:53,418 --> 01:21:57,209 Like a fucking phoenix from the ashes! 770 01:21:58,626 --> 01:22:01,918 It is a pick-up guide for men. 771 01:22:01,918 --> 01:22:07,168 How to go from man on the street to fucking machine. 772 01:22:07,168 --> 01:22:13,459 123 tips, illustrated throughout with pictures I have drawn of Christian. 773 01:22:14,418 --> 01:22:19,126 I would like to dedicate the last toast of the year - 774 01:22:19,126 --> 01:22:22,043 - to Christian. Cheers! 775 01:22:30,834 --> 01:22:34,501 Christian, don't be such a party pooper. 776 01:22:37,543 --> 01:22:39,793 - Hey! - What the hell? 777 01:22:43,126 --> 01:22:45,126 Take it easy! 778 01:22:51,834 --> 01:22:53,709 Christian! 779 01:24:31,001 --> 01:24:32,376 Christian! 780 01:25:15,876 --> 01:25:17,626 Hey, boss. 781 01:25:20,793 --> 01:25:22,876 Get lost. Go away. 782 01:25:23,959 --> 01:25:27,334 I thought I'd try to talk you down. 783 01:25:27,334 --> 01:25:30,376 Just leave me alone. For once. 784 01:25:31,251 --> 01:25:34,793 I'm not leaving here without you. 785 01:25:37,709 --> 01:25:40,084 OK. So what is this? 786 01:25:40,834 --> 01:25:44,251 - The final chapter? You save me? - Please... 787 01:25:44,251 --> 01:25:46,168 Chapter 123: 788 01:25:46,168 --> 01:25:50,043 Karl the Savior rescues Christian the Pathetic. 789 01:25:50,043 --> 01:25:53,251 What do you think I am? 790 01:25:53,251 --> 01:25:57,501 I think you went behind my back and wrote a book. 791 01:25:57,501 --> 01:26:02,918 You fucked someone you knew I liked. You forced me... 792 01:26:02,918 --> 01:26:06,959 Leo and I didn't force you to do anything. 793 01:26:07,751 --> 01:26:11,001 OK? You went along voluntarily. 794 01:26:11,001 --> 01:26:16,209 - After you fucked Mylian. - Yes, I fucked Mylian. 795 01:26:16,209 --> 01:26:21,793 I realized you liked her, so I fucked her. And it helped. 796 01:26:21,793 --> 01:26:25,334 - It helped? - Yes. Say what you want. 797 01:26:25,334 --> 01:26:30,418 You are a much better man than that wimp I met six months ago. 798 01:26:30,418 --> 01:26:36,918 If you keep listening to me, I can guarantee you an awesome life. 799 01:26:36,918 --> 01:26:41,084 And you know it. I did all that to open your eyes. 800 01:26:41,084 --> 01:26:46,043 To give you a chance to avoid being constantly rejected. 801 01:26:46,043 --> 01:26:47,834 Open my eyes? 802 01:26:49,584 --> 01:26:52,834 You are so fucking stupid. 803 01:26:52,834 --> 01:26:57,251 Just tell me what's wrong, and I'll help you. 804 01:26:58,043 --> 01:27:01,209 We raped a girl, Karl. 805 01:27:01,209 --> 01:27:03,334 Me and The Punisher. 806 01:27:04,709 --> 01:27:07,668 So fuck "being rejected." 807 01:27:09,876 --> 01:27:14,376 - Shit, I... - You didn't think that would happen? 808 01:27:14,376 --> 01:27:17,126 Of course not. You're an idiot. 809 01:27:17,126 --> 01:27:19,918 You have wasted half your life. 810 01:27:19,918 --> 01:27:22,126 Pissed it away. 811 01:27:23,251 --> 01:27:27,459 You claim I don't know how the world works. 812 01:27:27,459 --> 01:27:32,334 You're the one who's forgotten how the world works. 813 01:27:48,293 --> 01:27:50,334 Don't touch me! 814 01:28:38,168 --> 01:28:43,043 Hi. We have an appointment with Christian Lunde. 815 01:29:03,168 --> 01:29:06,293 - Hey, Chris. - Hi, boss. 816 01:29:12,293 --> 01:29:14,251 How's it going? 817 01:29:15,376 --> 01:29:17,209 Fine. 818 01:29:19,751 --> 01:29:21,293 And with you? 819 01:29:29,876 --> 01:29:32,459 Let's go find the bathroom. 820 01:29:39,834 --> 01:29:42,668 Seriously? You and Maja? 821 01:29:43,751 --> 01:29:45,918 Pretty sick, huh? 822 01:29:47,543 --> 01:29:49,793 How did that happen? 823 01:29:49,793 --> 01:29:54,834 We argued for, like, three days. She didn't believe me, so... 824 01:29:54,834 --> 01:29:56,626 I proposed. 825 01:30:15,584 --> 01:30:18,418 So how are you really doing? 826 01:30:20,084 --> 01:30:22,251 The doctor thinks - 827 01:30:23,168 --> 01:30:26,543 - I should stay a couple more weeks. 828 01:30:26,543 --> 01:30:29,209 But...I am doing fine. 829 01:30:31,918 --> 01:30:34,793 Have you gotten some diagnosis? 830 01:30:34,793 --> 01:30:38,001 Just your average depression. 831 01:30:39,918 --> 01:30:42,751 24 out of 30 on the scale. 832 01:30:52,543 --> 01:30:55,168 Listen, I would never... 833 01:30:56,126 --> 01:31:00,084 I would never have pushed you if I had known... 834 01:31:01,834 --> 01:31:03,626 It's OK. 835 01:31:08,043 --> 01:31:10,834 You said lots of things that... 836 01:31:17,751 --> 01:31:19,876 I just wanted to... 837 01:31:21,418 --> 01:31:23,251 I don't know. 838 01:31:26,959 --> 01:31:29,959 I just want to apologize. 839 01:31:32,751 --> 01:31:34,501 Thank you. 840 01:31:37,334 --> 01:31:41,459 Anyway, I talked to our publisher. 841 01:31:41,459 --> 01:31:45,084 We decided to can the entire book. 842 01:31:45,084 --> 01:31:47,501 This is the last copy. 843 01:31:48,376 --> 01:31:51,459 Let me know, and I'll delete it. 844 01:31:51,459 --> 01:31:53,459 Could I have it? 845 01:31:56,793 --> 01:31:58,751 Are you sure? 846 01:31:58,751 --> 01:32:02,168 I thought it might be interesting. 847 01:32:05,126 --> 01:32:08,793 To see things from your perspective. 848 01:32:08,793 --> 01:32:12,793 Fuck it. Take it. Do with it as you please. 849 01:32:15,501 --> 01:32:16,876 Thanks. 850 01:32:16,876 --> 01:32:20,959 There's probably a lot of porn on there. 851 01:32:20,959 --> 01:32:24,084 I mean, we're talking shitloads. 852 01:32:24,084 --> 01:32:30,209 If you find any shemale stuff, that was downloaded ironically. 853 01:32:38,876 --> 01:32:43,376 Leo eventually found the woman of his dreams... 854 01:32:43,959 --> 01:32:47,626 A ten of spades and billionaire heiress. 855 01:32:51,209 --> 01:32:53,668 Stop, you little shit! 856 01:32:56,126 --> 01:33:02,043 Unfortunately her mother was also a solid nine of clubs. 857 01:33:07,626 --> 01:33:11,876 Leo insists he'll soon give up the single lifestyle. 858 01:33:16,709 --> 01:33:22,418 Karl got into architecture school and married Maja. 859 01:33:26,501 --> 01:33:32,834 Their love has blossomed since she became number 123. 860 01:33:37,459 --> 01:33:41,626 They have two daughters. 861 01:33:43,418 --> 01:33:49,501 To Karl's great relief, he believes he has spied lesbian tendencies. 862 01:33:58,626 --> 01:34:00,876 And Christian? 863 01:34:00,876 --> 01:34:02,959 Well... 864 01:34:05,918 --> 01:34:10,543 Our next guest wrote a book about Oslo's pickup scene. 865 01:34:10,543 --> 01:34:13,876 It has already sold over 100,000 copies. 866 01:34:13,876 --> 01:34:19,084 Please welcome social worker and author Christian Lunde! 867 01:34:25,084 --> 01:34:27,501 Hi there! 868 01:34:27,501 --> 01:34:29,543 Hi, Christian. Welcome! 869 01:34:33,334 --> 01:34:36,918 Hi. It's great to have you here. 870 01:34:36,918 --> 01:34:39,168 - How are you? - Great. 871 01:34:39,168 --> 01:34:43,168 You had some scores to settle with yourself. 872 01:34:43,168 --> 01:34:47,668 I sure did. It was the only right thing to do. 873 01:34:48,584 --> 01:34:52,334 I had scores to settle with myself. 874 01:34:52,334 --> 01:34:55,293 And with others who had been affected. 875 01:34:55,751 --> 01:34:58,751 It has to do with attraction... 876 01:34:58,751 --> 01:35:00,334 Christian? 877 01:35:00,709 --> 01:35:02,376 Christian! 878 01:35:03,126 --> 01:35:05,376 I'll call you back. 879 01:35:05,376 --> 01:35:07,668 - Hi. - Hi! 880 01:35:08,876 --> 01:35:11,709 - Long time, no see. - Truly. 881 01:35:11,709 --> 01:35:14,751 - And now you're on TV. - Yeah. 882 01:35:16,709 --> 01:35:19,168 - How are you? - I'm great. 883 01:35:19,168 --> 01:35:23,418 Listen, I have an appointment. It was great seeing you. 884 01:35:23,418 --> 01:35:26,793 Don't you have two minutes to talk to me? 885 01:35:26,793 --> 01:35:30,084 Was there something in particular? 886 01:35:30,084 --> 01:35:32,084 Not really. 887 01:35:32,084 --> 01:35:34,918 That is, I just... 888 01:35:35,584 --> 01:35:39,501 I've been wondering if you feel that I... 889 01:35:39,501 --> 01:35:44,043 Was I mean? Did I take advantage of you somehow? 890 01:35:44,459 --> 01:35:46,501 Listen. 891 01:35:46,501 --> 01:35:50,376 You have nothing to feel guilty about, OK? 892 01:35:50,376 --> 01:35:53,543 OK. That was a huge relief. 893 01:35:53,543 --> 01:35:58,918 Except that you're the reason I tried to commit suicide. 894 01:36:04,918 --> 01:36:09,501 You should have seen your face. See you later! 895 01:36:11,751 --> 01:36:14,793 Hey, Christian. Hang on! 896 01:36:16,126 --> 01:36:18,168 Where are you headed? 897 01:36:18,168 --> 01:36:22,126 Actually, what I'm doing is going home - 898 01:36:22,126 --> 01:36:24,876 - for a nice, long wank. 898 01:36:25,305 --> 01:36:31,536 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from SubtitleDB.org 67170

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.