All language subtitles for w-lilyhammer0105.720p

Well, I'm the boss now.

Don't worry about my people.

But you better worry about yours.

It ain't safe around here no more.

From now on,
you're Giovanni Henriksen.

There's something fishy
about that guy.

I'm the project manager
for Sjusjoen Belleview.

Thomas, you must meet our
new partner properly.

Oh!

- Why, hello.
- We go way back.

We want to treat you
to a trip to Graceland.

So at least you'll be using your
suspension time on something enjoyable.

I've converted to Islam.

No. He's gone to seed
since his son ran away.

Congratulations.

We're having twins?

Fuck me.

DOUBLE HAPPINESS

- Hi, baby.
- Hi.

Listen, I'm sitting here
looking at carriages,

and I was wondering,

do you think we should have one of those
where they sit one after the other,

or should we go for
the wide type of carriage?

I'm not... I'm not sure I follow.

Tomorrow we're going

- to shop for the baby carriage, you know.
- Oh, yeah.

I wouldn't miss that for the world.

And then, I'm just wondering,
because, you know, in this one thing,

when the children sit
one after the other,

I've read that that's good,
the usual type.

Honey, I...

But the child
that sits behind...

You know, the baby is behind?

It can feel a bit neglected.

A little bit neglected.
So, I think this is so hard.

I can't really concentrate right now.
Can we do this tonight?

Okay. Then we talk about it later.

Yeah. Love you, too.

So, where is this party by the way?

At some cabin
Thomas Aune has rented at Hafjell.

Hafjell.
That's where he's hiding out?

Didn't you hear?

He got a conviction for some kind
of insider-deal,

has to wear one of those
ankle monitor things.

- Are you kidding me?
- No.

He can't move
more than 20 meters.

He goes straight to jail.

- That sounds like our Tommy boy, all right.
- Yeah.

Oh, Jesus!
I thought it was my parole officer.

Welcome to Honolulu, guys.

False alarm!

Good, good.

Good atmosphere
in this cell of yours.

It's getting better.

14 days to go...

What are you doing?
That happens to be a Bérd Breivik.

Cost me 40 grand.

40,000 for an ashtray?

Are you an idiot or something?

That sculpture
is probably worth around 80 now,

so I don't know who's the idiot here.

This art thing,

the value tends
to appreciate pretty good, huh?

If it's the right art.

Club's been doing better.

We could use a little investment.

- Under the radar, so to speak.
- Yeah.

Money laundering.

If you've heard of that.

We have to hook you up
with my art dealer in Oslo.

My man, Max.

Good. Go talk to him.

Hmm?

But I...

What the hell do I know
about art?

What's there to know?

Buy stuff that costs more
when you sell it.

First time in The Big Apple?

- How did you guess?
- The fanny pack's a giveaway.

Yeah, right.

So, what'd they book you for?

Oh, no, no, no. You see,
I'm a policeman, you know, from Norway.

- Oh, okay.
- Yeah.

Okay.

Yeah, well, that's me.

Well, have fun.

Hello.

Thank you for taking time to see me.

It's not every day
I get calls from European colleagues.

- I brought donuts.
- No, thanks.

I'm on a low-carb diet.

Yeah, I see.

What's this case you wanna talk about?

A couple of months ago,
a stranger shows up in my hometown.

A white, Caucasian male.

My gut says that he is
kind of fishy, you know.

First I think, terrorist.
But now, mafia.

Maybe you guys have a file on him.

Nope, never seen the guy before.

I'm sorry I couldn't help you.

Well, okay.

But do you know
where I can find this mafia type,

where they hang out and stuff?

If you want
to do street work in our jurisdiction,

your department needs
to send a formal request.

Yeah.

Look, this cop from overseas
just stopped by

with some interesting information
about our friend, the Fixer.

Oh. yeah?

Yeah, it seems like Tagliano is
maybe not so disappeared after all.

Motherfucker.

Hello?

I was just wondering
where you'd got to.

I'm sorry. The new inventory came in,

and I'm stuck here at work.

But when will you get back?

You know how it is.
These things can take all night.

Okay.

Don't wait up, huh?

- All right?
- Okay.

- I'll see you tomorrow.
- Bye.

If it isn't Mr. Fanny Pack.
Looks good.

You know what?

I'm not interested in any soliciting
if that's your plan.

What? A girl can't
ask a guy for a donut anymore?

- You want a donut? Okay.
- Mm-hmm.

So, how did your meeting go?

- That bad, huh?
- Yeah.

You know, I have a suspect
who I think is in the mafia,

but the police,
they won't give me any clues.

- Oh, maybe I can help you.
- How?

I know a couple of places
these wise guys hang out.

If you buy me dinner,
I'll take you there.

- I don't know.
- What? You got any other leads?

No.

MAIN ENTRANCE

I haven't seen
liver values like this

I've probably been overdoing things
a bit lately, yes.

But otherwise it all seems good.

That's good to hear. Was sure that there
was something seriously wrong with me.

Breathe in.

Yes.

That mole there.

Where?

- The contours are a bit diffused.
- Which one?

I think we should remove it
and send it to be analyzed.

Fuck.

I knew it.
I knew something wasn't right.

Well, we do these all the time.
Better to check it out once too often

rather than once too few.

So it's cancer?

How long do I have left?

I really think you're jumping
to conclusions much too quickly.

You don't have to try to put this gently.

Some things you just know.

- It's not certain that anything's wrong.
- Fuck.

There's...

There's no easy way to say this, my girl.

You're not going to take away
my MasterCard?

No, no.

Your dad

has most probably been
diagnosed with cancer.

I'm going to sell out of Belleview.

Carpe diem, as they say, and I want to
dedicate myself to my little family.

It's just such a shame Olav isn't here.

There's a strange smell here.

Alcohol, maybe?

- Is it from you or...
- it's the new inventory.

You know, I just had a taste of it.

It's probably your condition
making your nose more sensitive.

Well, it certainly is strong.

How's that pregnant yoga thing going?

Next week
it's birth exercises.

We should practice
to give birth, so then you have to come.

- What?
- Yeah?

You must come with me.

- Me?
- Yes.

Look, there's a limit to what a man can do
and still be a man.

And I'm not crossing that line.

You're coming,
I'm telling you.

Get in there.

- Hi.
- Hi. How can I be of assistance?

We're looking for a baby carriage for twins.

Well, we can sure help you with that!

If I had to choose I'd go for this one,
the TK Twinner Twist.

Yes, I've read about that one.

Yes, indeed, it wins every test,

and it's very easy to fold and open again.

It's very easy to fold together
and it's got very good reviews.

Well, it is rather expensive,
but this is like the Rolls Royce of the range.

How much?

It comes to about 12,000, plus tax.

12 grand?

Yes.

We got a little misunderstanding here,
my friend.

You see, we already have the babies.
We just need the carriage.

We do have simpler models.

- But I like this one.
- Yes?

I really like n.

- This one?
- Yes. Don't you?

- You're not going to regret this.
- Hey, I'm fine.

We just got to keep an eye on these kids
being spoiled too soon, that's all.

Yeah, yeah.

Yes, but don't you think you should...

Just...

You have to
sort of lift it over.

It's just a little tight, 'cause it's new.

No!

Shit.

Have you broken it?

Motherfucker.

Let me see.

Can't you be a little careful?

Take it easy.

You broke off the whole part.

It's okay. It's okay.
Just take it easy. Take it easy.

12 grand. It didn't last five minutes.

You didn't try to put it together without
the folder-lever, did you?

Look, I'll cover the repair, all right?

Just give me a new one.

I'm sorry, that's not possible.
This was the last one.

What are you talking about?
There's one right there.

Oh, no. That's just a display model.
It's not for sale.

But this one is also nice.

You sell me the Rolls,
and now the Volkswagen is suddenly okay?

I'll cover the repair,
that weenie-twister is coming with me!

Hey. No, no, no.

No, no, no.

Let go of that weenie-twister!

Chris! Call security.

Give me that thing!

Call security.

No!

I'm warning you!

Give me whatever you got.

What a day.

You know,

maybe I'll go to that yoga class after all.

Okay.

That make you happy?

A little.

Here's your coffee.

Oh, sorry,

I was so involved in the art.

Those are wallpaper samples.

Right. They're very nice anyway.

So what type of art is it you are after?

I'm after the type that's worth more
when you sell it than when you buy it.

I see. So you don't have
any esthetic preferences?

No. The important thing

is that the financing is done
outside the box, sort of.

Yes, I understood that on the phone.

But don't you have a particular artist
in mind? No inclinations?

No, just so long as it's around 300 grand.

Three-hundred...

Three-hundred thousand.

Okay. Just to start somewhere,

we have a Melgaard painting in
at the moment.

Never heard of him.

- No?
- Who is that?

Bjarne Melgaard is one of Norway's
most renowned contemporary artists.

Doesn't really ring a bell.

How's he when it comes to
price and increase in value and stuff?

The picture costs 280,000.

You can probably sell for twice that
in about five years.

Perfect. I'll take that one. I'll buy it.

Okay?

You don't want to see the picture?

- I'm leaving this to you professionals.
- Certainly.

Just pack it up, and I'll take it with me.

Are you going out, Olympia?

- Olav?
- Hi, Dad.

Hi.

What does this mean?
Are you home again for good now?

I've spoken to Olympia.
She told me about your condition.

Maybe there's some meaning to this after all.

If you could just grab the back...

Hey, boss, take a look.

I got no time. We got
an emergency with the Belleview project.

The art has arrived.
That you bought.

What is it?

I don't know.

Looks like the monkey's getting a blowjob.

See?

Jesus Christ, did you spend my money
on a monkey getting a blowjob?

The guy in the gallery
said this was the hottest art around.

Take it back!

I'm not sure about what kind of
return policy they...

My return policy is,

get it the fuck out of here
and get my money back!

But how am I supposed to...

- Did you like working at the NAV?
- I got it, boss.

- I got it boss.
- Thank you.

Sit.

Where's Julius, is he coming?

I haven't heard from him at all.

We'd better just begin.

Hi there, guys.

How's your form, Johnny-boy?

That was a pretty wild party, eh?

Stop dwelling on the past, jailbird.

You were so secretive
on the phone, what is this about?

Well, first I want to
welcome you

to this board meeting in Sjusjoen Belleview.

What board meeting?
You left the board when i joined, remember?

Yeah, yeah, but the way it is now,

Julius Backe
had to pull out for personal reasons.

So, Julius sold his shares.

What? Julius can't sell without talking to us.

But relax. It's in the best of hands.

Has Julius
sold his share to you?

An investment group
comprised of local business people,

with yours truly as a kind of front man.

The team up here have a
slightly different vision, and they want

more focus on family-friendly activities

like skiing and a water park.

"Sjusjoen Belleview, El Dorado for kids. "

I got a penthouse in this thing.
I don't plan on living in Disneyland.

We happen to be the majority shareholder.

That's what makes business so exciting.

Sometimes you have to compromise.

Hello?

Excuse me. Hey there.

Hang it over there. Yes?

I've got some art here I want to get rid of.

Indeed? What are we talking about?
Is it a print,

photograph, painting?

It's some kind of drawing.

Quite.

Let's see.

But this is a Melgaard.

Yeah, it's fuckin' exclusive.

This is something we'd be most interested in.

That's great.

But let's put a price down on the table,
I ain't selling this

to anybody for any price.

I shall get our expert on modern art
to give you a valuation.

Sounds good. Be careful.

Yes.

What the fuck are you up to
with the Belleview project?

I've had to sell out
in order to deal with some family problems.

Bullshit! I made the deal with you!

Not some hillbillies trying
to turn the place into fucking Aqualand!

Well, the deal is done. I'm sorry.

Not half as sorry as you're gonna be,
you whining, fucking cocksucker!

You really wanna fuck with me?

You can't talk like that
to my father!

Relax, Osama,
it's between me and your father.

Do you have no respect?
The man is sick!

What's he saying?

Come on! What are you saying?

He's got cancer.

Jesus. Why didn't you say something?

I don't like to be
a burden to people.

Fuck.

Dad, it's for you.

Then tell them that I'm out, then.

Dr. Utsi.

I'm ready.

What's the prognosis?

- Prognosis?
- Yes,

how long have I got left?

No, listen, the tests are completely fine.

What?

I don't understand.

Is the cancer less aggressive
than first assumed?

What I'm saying is that you don't have cancer.

But what about the diffused contours?

What about my father's medical record?

Yes, all that was a cause of concern.
But now it's all been checked.

Jesus. What the fuck do I do now, then?

Look, this is good news, Julius.

Good news... Oh, yes.

What did he say?

Hmm?

What did Dr. Utsi say?

No, he... What should I say...

It's pretty much what we had expected.

We're going to do some more tests,
then we'll see.

This Dr. Tutsy...

Dr. Utsi?

- He's from Lapland.
- Lapland, huh?

He's good, huh?

- Yeah, he's good.
- Well...

If there's anything I can do, okay,
don't hesitate to call.

Thank you, Johnny.
Thank you for being so generous.

All right.

About time.

- Well, what's the price?
- We have a problem.

We've checked the register, and it appears
that this picture was stolen last year.

- What?
- Yes, so we've had to alert the authorities.

This...

This is just stupid. Get the painting,
and I'll go to another shop.

It's not that simple.

The police are on their way to collect the
painting and return it to its rightful owner.

Rightful owner?

But I bought that from Gallery Air
for several hundred thousand.

Then it's just a matter
of presenting the papers.

What do you mean "papers"? Which papers?

You surely must have

documents relating to
a purchase of this magnitude?

Otherwise, I rather think the police will
be wanting to have a word with you, too.

But of course I've got papers.

Good.

- Yeah, Torgeir.
- Yeah.

- Talk to me.
- Yeah.

The monkey picture
was stolen.

They stole my monkey?

No, it was stolen when we bought it.

Motherfucker!

I've been talking to the people here,

and the guy that sold it to us
is gonna be back in a couple of hours. So...

You stay there, you hear me? I'm coming.

Sure. Okay, boss.

You do me a favor tonight...

- Hi.
- Hi, baby.

Are you ready?

- Yeah.
- Yeah?

- Yeah, I was really ready.
- Yeah...

- I was looking forward to this...
- Good.

Torgeir just called.
I got an emergency. I gotta run.

The good news is
Arnie's gonna take you. Okay?

He's taking me to yoga class?

- Yeah, he's gonna take you to yoga...
- Oh, come on.

And he's gonna buy you dinner first, okay?
On me, okay? I gotta go.

You can't just leave!

It's gonna be great.

I can't go to yoga class with Arne!

- Okay.
- Excuse me?

You the European cop who
was looking for some wise guy.

Yeah, maybe.

I got a pal who runs a joint
a couple of blocks from here,

who can help you out.

How do you know
what my friend's looking for?

What the fuck do you care?
Take a hike, sister.

Come on, man. I'm getting bad vibes.
Let's get out of here.

You're not going anywhere.

Fucking Oslo prick.

You owe me money.

You con me into buying a pervo-picture

and on top of that it turns out to be stolen.

Please. I'm just a middleman.

I just got a cut!

We need you to tell us
who hired you to sell that painting.

I can't remember.

I've worked with so many...

I'm gonna mention a name now. Van Gogh.
You know that name?

Vincent van Gogh.

That's the one.

You're gonna cooperate,

or you're gonna look just like him.

Okay, okay, okay.

It's a guy from Lillehammer.

Thomas Aune.

That fucker.

Motherfucker.

Motherfucker!

What's that?

It's an installation
about how society treats animals.

No, no, no, no. What's the carriage?
Is that a weenie-twister?

I don't know. I don't know.

That goes with us. Lose the meat.

You can't just take it. Sorry.

You don't mind if that goes with us, do you?

Please, be my guest.

Yeah, I didn't think so.

And when
a labor contraction occurs,

we do doggy-breathing. Off we go.

Dads, too.

Hey!

First of all,

what kind of a putz
takes a Jacuzzi in this kind of weather?

Get the fuck down!

And second,

where's my monkey?

You know what? He called me.
He called me, the gallerist from Oslo.

And they told me it was a misunderstanding
with the painting.

Oh, really?

I promise you, I didn't plan to sell it.
But then the Belleview project come up.

And you know how that works.

So you fucked me over with the painting,

so you could
fuck me over with the Belleview project.

Is that about it, Tommy boy?

No, no, no, no. It's Max. The idiot, Max.

He never should have sold it to you guys.
You're my friends.

But that's what happened.

Where's his monkey, bitch?

I don't have that painting.

Don't give me that!

I don't have it.

The gallery-people said
they were gonna hand it back.

I sure don't have it.
So, I'm sorry, guys.

I think it's time for a little walk.

No!

Guys, I go to jail.

If I go out any longer, I go to jail.

I want my monkey.

Not any further.

Johnny wants his monkey!

Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay.

Okay, what?

It's behind the oven
in the sauna.

It's in the sauna.

- That's the truth?
- Yeah.

Let him go.

No!

Fuck it!

Where's that piece of shit
Frank Tagliano hiding, huh?

You were dying
to talk about him a little while ago,

and now you fucking clam up?

Fuck!

Shut her up.

Easy, Jerry. Easy there...

You're gonna fucking pay for that, bitch.

- Put the gun down!
- You fucking perv!

Put the gun down.

- Easy, easy, easy, easy. Put the...
- Fucking perv.

Put the gun down!

Fuck!

Welcome to Sinatra Night

here at Flamingo.

I can see that everybody's got
something to drink.

That made me think of a quote

that an old friend of Blue Eyes...

Sorry, buddy,
there's a dress code here tonight.

I'm gonna have to ask you to leave.

The point is this is a theme night.
And this isn't exactly the theme.

He said,

"I pity the foo!
who doesn't drink

"because every time
they wake up in the morning,

"that's the best they ever gonna feel
that day. "

- Ha ha!

This decorative sweater is worth more...

Is there a problem here?

This gorilla won't let me in.

I wonder why. You look like Halloween.

I'm wearing traditional summer clothing.

Well, you might be the king of the Eskimos,
but we have a dress code here.

I've been honored
for my work as a doctor in this town,

and now I'm being refused entry
because I'm from Lapland.

Yeah, well, I don't really care...

Did you say you were a doctor from Lapland?

Yes.

By any chance, would you happen
to be the doctor of Mr. Julius Backe?

Yes, indeed.

You're all right. Arnie, he's all right.

You're in. Let me buy you a drink.
Now you say you are a friend of Julius.

Try that.

Is that a genuine Melgaard painting?

- You like his stuff?
- It's fantastic!

Well, you know, for a price,
it could be back on the market.

I don't have that kind of money.

Shame about Julie, huh?

What do you mean?

You know, I guess
he didn't catch it fast enough.

His tests, they were fine.

Fine? The guy got the big C.

I mean, terminal, no?

Well...
lam bound to professional secrecy.

Son of a bitch.

I didn't say anything.

Before you go,
I got a little business proposition for you.

- Are you hurt?
- Yes.

Geir?

Laila?

Is that you, Laila?

Geir?

It was two guys.
Italian-American.

One short, gray hair.
The other one, younger. Dark hair.

I can come to the station,
help you do the drawing.

No, no. You've been more than helpful.
Now go get yourself a warm beverage.

Hey, Lieutenant.
Yeah, I'm at the crime scene now.

Yeah, some hillbilly tourist who was
here visiting one of the regulars, Deshawna.

Yeah, probably buying drugs. Yeah.

As per usual,
nobody's seen or heard anything.

I'm afraid this is gonna end up
right in the pile of unsolved cases.

He's fucking crazy.

It's not really a good time
for a call tonight, Johnny.

Well, I figured you might be gone tomorrow.

- So we better talk now.
- Okay.

I got a solution to the Belleview project.
You're gonna buy me out.

But I already just sold my share
because of, you know what.

Yeah, you're gonna
take that money you got from Tommy boy

and give it to me for my piece.

But my share was four times the size of yours.

Come on,
that doesn't make sense.

A lot of things don't make sense, you know.
Like your medical records for instance.

Where the fuck did you get this one?

It's not important where I got it, Julie.

What's important is what your kids
are gonna say when I show it to them.

No, no. Come on, please.

You've got to
understand, Johnny,

at first I thought I was ill...

Then Olav came home,
and I was given a fresh start with my kids.

Julie, you're mixing me up
with somebody who gives a fuck.

Just sign over the money.

What a fucking idiot, I...

You really don't want your kids knowing
the truth about their father, do you?

- Yeah.
- We're ready for you now.

Sorry to disturb you guys.

But I ran into the doc,
and he has some news that just won't wait.

Well, as we all
know Julius has been diagnosed with cancer.

We've done some new tests,

it seems the cancer
is in the process of receding.

- Receding?
- Yes.

It looks as if he is going to
make a complete recovery.

This is almost like a miracle.

It must be all the care from you.

Yeah!

I've got a boss
who loves Sinatra, who's a big Sinatra fan.

And because of that, the band has

prepared a tune that we thought we'd

hear if...

What do you feel, boss?

- Take the challenge?
- What? Me?

- Yeah.
- No.

Oh, come on.

- No, I can't. No...
- Johnny.

Johnny!

Johnny,
Johnny, Johnny, Johnny!

Johnny, Johnny, Johnny!

All right. All right.

Let's hear it! Let's hear it! Let's hear it!

Let's hear it!

How did all these people get in my room?

Maestro, one of your finest chords, please.

Now this could only happen to a guy like me

And only happen in a town like this

Am I right?

So may I say to each of you most gratefully

As I throw each one of you a kiss

This is my kind of town

Lillehammer is

My kind of town

Lillehammer is

My kind of people, too

People who smile at you

And each time i sneeze, Lillehammer is

It must be that Lillehammer freeze

Lillehammer is

Majestic mountain views all around

It's my kind of town

Am I right or am I right, huh?

How am I doing so far?

Sit down. I'm not finished yet.

My kind of town

Lillehammer is

My kind of town

Lillehammer is

Reindeer and moose, hello

And you know, all that snow

And each time I run

Lillehammer is

Busting my buns, Lillehammer is

So, no clues as to where this guy is from?

I'm telling you,
that's where Tagliano was hiding out.

No passport, no plane ticket,
no driver's license, no nothing.

Well, didn't it occur to you
to just ask the guy?

We were gonna.

But then Mr. Trigger Happy here
decided to shoot him instead.

Hey, look, he attacked me.

I mean, fuck this, huh?

Now, look at this.

Pack your lederhosen, boys.
You're going to Norway.

It's my kind of

Town

Yeah!

- Yeah!
- It's my kind of town, baby.

- That's still the tune.

Bull's eye!

Yeah!