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What are we talking about here?
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You want us to launch a cryptocurrency?
3
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You wanted an alternative to Laurie Bream.
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Pied Piper Coin.
5
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Mm.
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_
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I promised Richard that we would never
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make them harvest data or sell ads.
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I am not saying that we will
force their hand on this issue.
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But neither am I saying
definitively that we will not.
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Have you received my proposal?
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Very promising.
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Look, Monica, I will do the ICO,
14
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but only if you do it with me.
15
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Pied Piper Coin is totally going to work.
16
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Yes, it totally is.
17
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Whose idea was this again?
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_
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Okay, everybody.
20
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Let's do this.
21
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Photo time. Let's go.
22
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Front-enders, come on in.
Where's my back-enders?
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I see you, crypto-geeks.
24
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Follow me!
25
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Old Pipey thing.
26
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Holden. Are we set?
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Sorry. I haven't used this camera before.
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Are we set?
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Yes, Jared.
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Look... uh, look, guys.
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I-I know we didn't have the
budget we wanted to get here.
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But, we are here.
33
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Finally, all our hard work has paid off.
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So now, the world's first,
totally decentralized Internet
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will be live... in five...
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Four,
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three, two, one.
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Yeah!
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_
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_
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Richard. Richard!
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Richard.
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_
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You have to see this.
45
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What's wrong now?
46
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A good thing.
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A good thing has finally happened.
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Don't fuck with me.
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I am not fucking with you!
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Come, come.
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Look.
52
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Look at the user numbers.
53
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Wait, holy shit. Is that right?
54
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I think we've reached the inflection point.
55
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We made it.
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- Don't, just... don't.
- Yeah.
57
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Well, I think this
calls for a little celebration.
58
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I just knew that if we kept plugging away,
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eventually, we'd get some traction
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and reach an inflection point.
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What did I keep saying?
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Give us time and then we'll climb, bitches!
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Yes, Holden.
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That's right, except for
the bitches part, but yes.
65
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And now, we are gaining
almost 12,000 users an hour!
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Fuck, yeah!
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You get a high five
and you get a high five!
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- Fuck yeah!
- I wanna give a quick shout-out
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to my seven developers,
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my Septapipers,
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who stuck with us through thick and thin,
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unlike K-Hole,
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which took their game
and totally bailed on us.
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Lock them up! Lock them up!
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Jesus, Jared. You really
did a number on that kid.
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God. Yeah.
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I just chipped away everything
that wasn't Richard's assistant
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and this is what's left.
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Lock them up!
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Synced and corrected by louvette
www.addic7ed.com
81
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So, how are things advancing?
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To date,
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we have manufactured almost
400,000 mobile devices.
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And we are signing them all
onto the Pied Piper network?
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Yes.
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Well, we have to do it manually.
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It is slow.
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But it provides an advantage.
89
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They may not know what we are doing
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until it's too late for them to stop us.
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Indeed.
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Yeah. To be honest,
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at times, I find it difficult
to tell what you're thinking.
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Mmm, I see.
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? Come on babe ?
96
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? Follow me ?
97
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? I'm the Pied Piper ?
98
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? Follow me I'm the Pied... ?
99
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Pappy Van Winkle?
100
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I'm not gonna have to start
101
00:04:41,201 --> 00:04:42,967
locking my desk drawer now, am I?
102
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Hey, does this seem odd to you?
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What?
104
00:04:46,473 --> 00:04:48,906
So, our user numbers have
been growing for days,
105
00:04:48,941 --> 00:04:51,018
but our coin value is flat.
106
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It hasn't budged at all.
107
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I thought the two would be correlated,
108
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at least a little bit.
109
00:04:55,748 --> 00:04:57,048
Yeah. Should be.
110
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Sorry, I don't mean to rain on the parade.
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I find parades to be
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impotent displays of authoritarianism.
113
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Whose bag is this?
114
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- Uh... oh.
- Scoot over.
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Colin?
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- Hey, man.
- What are you doing here?
117
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I like the beard. You throwing a party?
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Yeah. Something that you and K-Hole
Games could've been a part of,
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had you not walked out on us.
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Oh, come on, man. Laurie was our VC.
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She's the one that made me pull
the game and bail on you guys.
122
00:05:30,717 --> 00:05:32,216
So you just do whatever Laurie says, huh?
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00:05:32,251 --> 00:05:34,408
- Well, she had control of my board.
- Hmm.
124
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Which is exactly how she
just managed to fire me.
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You lost your company?
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Aw. Bummer.
127
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But, the cool part is, I'm free.
128
00:05:44,714 --> 00:05:45,800
Which is why I'm here.
129
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I have been cooking up a
solo project on the side
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for a few years.
131
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It's a killer new game.
132
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And I was thinking maybe,
133
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we would launch it on your network.
134
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It's a sweet indie RPG.
135
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I'm calling it "The Gates of Galloo."
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I have a ton of presales.
137
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If we put this thing on Pipernet, bam.
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You're gonna have 80,000 instant users.
139
00:06:06,931 --> 00:06:09,844
- What do you say?
- You and K-Hole pull your game.
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A game that was the central element
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to our launch strategy.
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And then literally days after everything
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starts to fucking come together,
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you stroll on in here and act
like nothing ever happened?
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Stroll?
146
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I just walked in here normally.
147
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Besides, this would
help you out too, right?
148
00:06:26,017 --> 00:06:27,764
You... you wanna help me out?
149
00:06:28,386 --> 00:06:29,864
You just lost your company.
150
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I'm in there celebrating,
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with my fucking victory.
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Dude.
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Can I be real with you?
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I really need this.
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Can I be realer?
156
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Kiss my piss.
157
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What?
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You heard me. Kiss my piss.
159
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I was hoping you'd be cool about this.
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Oh, really? You thought I might
be cool, Mr. Backwards Hat?
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Is this cool, huh?
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To do this, maybe?
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I don't know.
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Kiss my piss.
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Kiss...
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my piss.
167
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All right, I get it.
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Kiss my piss.
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I'll see you around, Richard.
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Karma's a bitch, Colin.
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- Oh! Monica, hey.
- Hey.
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Hey, I was just coming in early to clean up
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for the custodial staff.
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When did you get here?
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- We never left.
- We?
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All right. Good to go.
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You were both here all night?
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Our coin price wasn't
growing with our user numbers,
179
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so we coded a diagnostic
tool to go through the ledger
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and figure out exactly where
our users are coming from.
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Yes. We coded it.
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You're smoking my cigarettes, asshole.
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In a public workspace, in the
state of California, no less.
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Shall we?
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This breaks our users down
186
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by which developers signed them on.
187
00:08:05,240 --> 00:08:07,736
So, each bar is one of
our seven Septopipers.
188
00:08:08,482 --> 00:08:10,310
Wait, why are there eight bars?
189
00:08:10,345 --> 00:08:12,479
- Who... who's that?
- No idea.
190
00:08:12,514 --> 00:08:15,882
But whoever it is, they are the
reason for most of our new user growth.
191
00:08:15,918 --> 00:08:18,418
Wait, so some non-piper
out there is signing up
192
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users to our network en masse?
193
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How'd they get access to our system?
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Without a key from us,
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the only way in is to steal our software.
196
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But no one has stolen our software.
197
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Except for...
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Oh, shit.
199
00:08:38,640 --> 00:08:39,739
Hello?
200
00:08:39,775 --> 00:08:41,574
Hey, Jian-Yang. It's Big Head.
201
00:08:41,609 --> 00:08:42,741
How's it going, man?
202
00:08:42,777 --> 00:08:43,943
He's been in contact
203
00:08:43,979 --> 00:08:45,345
with Jian-Yang this whole time?
204
00:08:45,380 --> 00:08:46,846
Yeah, they play Words with Friends.
205
00:08:46,881 --> 00:08:50,283
Cool, cool. Listen, Gilfoyle
wants to ask you a question.
206
00:08:50,318 --> 00:08:52,852
No. I don't want to talk to Gilfoyle.
207
00:08:52,887 --> 00:08:54,820
He's a racist and a witch.
208
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I'm not a witch. Now spit out the kimchi
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00:08:56,824 --> 00:08:59,058
and tell me what the fuck
is going on with our network.
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Fuck you. I'll tell you nothing.
211
00:09:01,162 --> 00:09:03,462
_
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00:09:08,970 --> 00:09:11,292
Okay. I'll tell you everything.
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00:09:11,906 --> 00:09:14,105
But I want to move back into the house.
214
00:09:16,978 --> 00:09:18,327
I want to come home.
215
00:09:18,513 --> 00:09:19,545
Wait, what?
216
00:09:19,580 --> 00:09:20,880
It's not that big a deal.
217
00:09:20,915 --> 00:09:22,846
I mean, Jian-Yang could
just take Erlich's old room.
218
00:09:23,083 --> 00:09:24,160
So...
219
00:09:24,927 --> 00:09:26,685
I don't give a fuck about that.
220
00:09:27,389 --> 00:09:29,822
So, Jian-Yang said Gavin Belson
221
00:09:29,847 --> 00:09:31,725
tried to buy our stolen software?
222
00:09:31,759 --> 00:09:33,013
Yes, but before he could,
223
00:09:33,038 --> 00:09:35,761
he was outmaneuvered by
a Chinese man named Yao.
224
00:09:35,976 --> 00:09:38,096
Yao? Who the fuck is Yao?
225
00:09:38,132 --> 00:09:39,197
This guy.
226
00:09:39,952 --> 00:09:41,366
He's a Chinese manufacturer
227
00:09:41,402 --> 00:09:44,114
who just announced a
partnership with guess who?
228
00:09:44,405 --> 00:09:45,571
Laurie Bream.
229
00:09:45,606 --> 00:09:49,441
She just led a $200 million
round for something called YaoNet.
230
00:09:49,476 --> 00:09:52,444
So Laurie and Yao are manufacturing phones,
231
00:09:52,479 --> 00:09:53,836
and signing them onto our network.
232
00:09:54,214 --> 00:09:56,734
But why? Why would they wanna help us?
233
00:09:56,862 --> 00:09:58,061
Oh, shit.
234
00:09:58,385 --> 00:10:00,285
They're not helping us.
They're attacking us.
235
00:10:00,320 --> 00:10:01,486
It's the 51% attack.
236
00:10:01,522 --> 00:10:03,455
- Has to be.
- I'm sorry, what?
237
00:10:03,490 --> 00:10:04,489
A 51...
238
00:10:10,864 --> 00:10:12,464
A 51% attack...
239
00:10:14,968 --> 00:10:17,502
The beauty of our decentralized Internet
240
00:10:17,538 --> 00:10:19,504
is that no one controls it.
241
00:10:19,540 --> 00:10:22,078
But if 51% were controlled
242
00:10:22,103 --> 00:10:23,640
by one entity,
243
00:10:23,676 --> 00:10:25,591
like, say, Laurie and Yao,
244
00:10:26,011 --> 00:10:27,511
they could rewrite the rules for everyone.
245
00:10:27,547 --> 00:10:29,380
They can delete all of our users,
246
00:10:29,415 --> 00:10:32,149
all of our developer apps, crash our coin.
247
00:10:32,185 --> 00:10:35,553
- This would be the end of Pied Piper.
- Fuck!
248
00:10:35,588 --> 00:10:37,488
Okay. How many devices do they have?
249
00:10:40,759 --> 00:10:44,328
Right now, they have 45% of our total.
250
00:10:44,596 --> 00:10:45,962
- And gaining.
- Wait, Gilfoyle.
251
00:10:45,997 --> 00:10:49,299
Could you write a patch that kicks
all of Yao's users off the network?
252
00:10:49,335 --> 00:10:51,335
I would have to rewrite
our consensus protocol,
253
00:10:51,370 --> 00:10:53,303
but I could probably get
that done in eight hours.
254
00:10:53,339 --> 00:10:54,387
Okay, that's good.
255
00:10:54,388 --> 00:10:55,685
And... and how long do we have
256
00:10:55,686 --> 00:10:57,050
till we lose control of the network?
257
00:10:57,086 --> 00:10:59,205
At this rate, half that.
258
00:11:04,672 --> 00:11:06,205
I just went for a run.
259
00:11:08,510 --> 00:11:09,633
I sprinted...
260
00:11:09,944 --> 00:11:11,244
up the last bit, there.
261
00:11:14,215 --> 00:11:15,615
I did open palm.
262
00:11:16,167 --> 00:11:17,283
Aaah!
263
00:11:17,751 --> 00:11:19,352
Wh-What's going on?
264
00:11:19,822 --> 00:11:22,490
Richard, there's no easy way to say this.
265
00:11:22,526 --> 00:11:24,925
Jian-Yang is moving back into the house.
266
00:11:26,216 --> 00:11:27,310
Right?
267
00:11:27,356 --> 00:11:30,589
Gavin, you've staked the
entire future of this company
268
00:11:30,624 --> 00:11:32,992
on the Signature Box Three.
269
00:11:33,466 --> 00:11:34,536
Where are they?
270
00:11:34,571 --> 00:11:36,518
Well, the last two months
have been challenging.
271
00:11:36,725 --> 00:11:38,124
The Chinese were petulant.
272
00:11:38,160 --> 00:11:40,327
The North Carolinians proved very entitled.
273
00:11:40,362 --> 00:11:43,797
And I held out hopes for our
experiment in the Yukon Territories.
274
00:11:43,832 --> 00:11:44,995
But as it happens,
275
00:11:44,996 --> 00:11:48,030
the Inuit are surprisingly
adept at collective bargaining.
276
00:11:48,065 --> 00:11:49,200
But fear not,
277
00:11:49,752 --> 00:11:52,186
I am in the early stages of a new plan.
278
00:11:52,354 --> 00:11:54,285
Did you know that some of America's
279
00:11:54,286 --> 00:11:57,090
most capable, motivated laborers
280
00:11:57,125 --> 00:11:59,326
are at this moment awaiting execution?
281
00:11:59,361 --> 00:12:00,382
Gavin.
282
00:12:00,663 --> 00:12:03,664
How many boxes have you
actually managed to produce?
283
00:12:03,884 --> 00:12:05,383
Well, we have the 40 prototypes,
284
00:12:05,418 --> 00:12:07,159
which we've been using to drive sales.
285
00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:08,989
- And?
- And...
286
00:12:10,663 --> 00:12:12,429
they are very impressive.
287
00:12:12,464 --> 00:12:13,497
I see.
288
00:12:14,333 --> 00:12:16,359
I guess it's time we tell you.
289
00:12:16,681 --> 00:12:18,215
We've been exploring the viability
290
00:12:18,250 --> 00:12:19,816
of an acquisition with Amazon.
291
00:12:19,852 --> 00:12:21,384
The talks are still preliminary,
292
00:12:21,419 --> 00:12:23,754
but thus far, they seem quite promising.
293
00:12:23,789 --> 00:12:25,881
You expect me to work for Jeff Bezos?
294
00:12:26,105 --> 00:12:27,482
No fucking way.
295
00:12:27,605 --> 00:12:29,139
I mean, don't take this
as any kind of threat,
296
00:12:29,174 --> 00:12:32,142
but if Amazon buys this company, I am out.
297
00:12:32,177 --> 00:12:34,177
We spoke to Jeff an hour ago.
298
00:12:34,477 --> 00:12:37,714
It sounds like the two of you
are on the same page about that.
299
00:12:40,385 --> 00:12:42,786
Priyanka, start separating legitimate users
300
00:12:42,821 --> 00:12:43,787
into their own pool.
301
00:12:43,822 --> 00:12:46,121
Becky, I need you to
rate-limit enemy devices.
302
00:12:46,157 --> 00:12:49,325
Danny, find shortcuts to
deploy a new consensus protocol.
303
00:12:49,360 --> 00:12:51,627
Sorry, but we're never
gonna finish in time.
304
00:12:51,663 --> 00:12:52,961
Not with that attitude.
305
00:12:52,997 --> 00:12:55,698
Yeah, we would need to add a
shit ton more users immediately.
306
00:12:55,733 --> 00:12:56,802
Working on it.
307
00:12:56,827 --> 00:12:59,236
Colin, hey. It's... it's Richard Hendricks.
308
00:12:59,270 --> 00:13:00,636
Leaving you another voicemail.
309
00:13:00,672 --> 00:13:03,806
Um, just wanted to talk
to you about your game.
310
00:13:03,935 --> 00:13:07,872
And, uh, those, uh,
80,000 users you got there.
311
00:13:08,079 --> 00:13:10,646
And also, to apologize for last night.
312
00:13:10,682 --> 00:13:14,083
You know, I was just really
wasted. I was so drunk.
313
00:13:14,118 --> 00:13:15,784
We had such a crazy party going on.
314
00:13:15,820 --> 00:13:18,020
Anyway, call me back and we'll, uh,
315
00:13:18,055 --> 00:13:19,788
we'll chat some "Gates of Galloo."
316
00:13:19,824 --> 00:13:21,056
We'll, uh, we'll "Galloo" it up.
317
00:13:21,092 --> 00:13:23,291
How's that sound? Well, just call me back.
318
00:13:23,327 --> 00:13:26,015
Okay? It's... it's
Richard Hendricks, it's...
319
00:13:27,297 --> 00:13:28,602
Thank you. Bye.
320
00:13:29,281 --> 00:13:31,248
- Left another voicemail.
- Doesn't really matter.
321
00:13:31,283 --> 00:13:33,538
He's gonna be off the grid
for the next three days.
322
00:13:33,563 --> 00:13:35,486
- What?
- Yeah, I just spoke with his girlfriend.
323
00:13:35,521 --> 00:13:37,654
Whatever the fuck you
said, he took really hard.
324
00:13:37,690 --> 00:13:39,623
Colin went camping. Alone.
325
00:13:39,658 --> 00:13:41,314
Well, did she say where he went?
326
00:13:41,339 --> 00:13:43,230
The Los Trancos Preserve?
327
00:13:43,297 --> 00:13:45,482
Wait. I know exactly where that is.
328
00:13:45,755 --> 00:13:47,254
I used to go foraging for mushrooms
329
00:13:47,289 --> 00:13:49,724
with my friend Muriel there
before she passed away.
330
00:13:49,759 --> 00:13:52,025
I could drive up there
and... and look for him.
331
00:13:52,061 --> 00:13:53,427
It's only 20 miles away
332
00:13:53,463 --> 00:13:55,402
and they don't really
enforce the speed limit.
333
00:13:56,866 --> 00:13:58,809
Fuck your Volt. I'll drive.
334
00:14:00,536 --> 00:14:02,603
- What... what are you doing?
- I'm borrowing my Tesla.
335
00:14:02,638 --> 00:14:04,905
- It's my Tesla.
- I pay for it.
336
00:14:04,940 --> 00:14:06,774
And if I don't get to Colin in time,
337
00:14:06,809 --> 00:14:08,542
Pied Piper ceases to exist.
338
00:14:08,578 --> 00:14:11,512
So, pretty please with
a fucking cherry on top,
339
00:14:11,547 --> 00:14:13,414
can I borrow the Tesla I bought for you?
340
00:14:14,917 --> 00:14:16,444
- Can Jared drive?
- No.
341
00:14:17,787 --> 00:14:19,219
- Fine.
- Thank you.
342
00:14:24,271 --> 00:14:25,309
So...?
343
00:14:25,672 --> 00:14:27,272
So... we're fucked.
344
00:14:27,502 --> 00:14:29,068
No, we're not. Okay, we just...
345
00:14:29,103 --> 00:14:30,136
We need a few more users
346
00:14:30,171 --> 00:14:32,041
to give Gilfoyle some breathing room and...
347
00:14:32,541 --> 00:14:34,607
And what if you call Dana from Quiver?
348
00:14:34,643 --> 00:14:36,343
He hates me. Everybody does.
349
00:14:36,378 --> 00:14:38,445
And to be honest, they're
right. I'm an asshole.
350
00:14:38,480 --> 00:14:39,779
No, you're not, Richard.
351
00:14:39,815 --> 00:14:40,880
Yes, I am.
352
00:14:40,915 --> 00:14:43,440
Colin was here last night,
out there in the hallway,
353
00:14:43,465 --> 00:14:44,551
down on his luck
354
00:14:44,586 --> 00:14:46,820
and he was begging me
to take his subscribers.
355
00:14:46,855 --> 00:14:47,941
And I told him to...
356
00:14:48,523 --> 00:14:51,023
kiss... my piss.
357
00:14:51,960 --> 00:14:53,326
- You what?
- Kiss my piss.
358
00:14:53,362 --> 00:14:54,994
I said it again and again.
359
00:14:55,418 --> 00:14:57,500
Oh my God. I did a dance.
360
00:14:59,533 --> 00:15:02,423
Okay, okay, okay. Let's
just move on from...
361
00:15:02,595 --> 00:15:03,636
this.
362
00:15:03,637 --> 00:15:06,813
I am a spiteful, vengeful prick.
363
00:15:07,007 --> 00:15:08,474
Oh my God, Richard.
364
00:15:08,509 --> 00:15:09,608
Yes, you fucked up.
365
00:15:09,643 --> 00:15:11,910
But that doesn't mean you're a bad person.
366
00:15:11,945 --> 00:15:14,513
Look at you, you're
sitting here, regretting it.
367
00:15:14,548 --> 00:15:15,814
That's not the move of an asshole.
368
00:15:15,850 --> 00:15:19,150
Okay? I mean, you think a guy
like Gavin Belson just sits around,
369
00:15:19,186 --> 00:15:21,019
feeling bad about being a dick to people?
370
00:15:21,054 --> 00:15:22,421
He doesn't even notice, okay?
371
00:15:22,456 --> 00:15:23,622
The guy's a prick when he was on top
372
00:15:23,657 --> 00:15:25,491
and now after everything
that just happened,
373
00:15:25,526 --> 00:15:26,558
he's still gonna be a prick.
374
00:15:26,594 --> 00:15:28,427
What do you... What do you mean?
375
00:15:28,462 --> 00:15:30,061
Everything that just
happened. What happened?
376
00:15:30,097 --> 00:15:33,564
I just read that Amazon's
probably gonna be acquiring Hooli.
377
00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:34,565
What?
378
00:15:34,601 --> 00:15:36,601
Yeah, so Gavin Belson's
gonna be out on his ass,
379
00:15:36,636 --> 00:15:38,669
but do you think he's gonna
change at all because of it?
380
00:15:38,705 --> 00:15:40,102
No, he's always gonna be a...
381
00:15:40,293 --> 00:15:41,272
prick.
382
00:15:41,307 --> 00:15:43,641
Exactly. Okay, so stop whipping yourself
383
00:15:43,676 --> 00:15:46,096
- and let's just figure out what we can do.
- He's a prick.
384
00:15:46,184 --> 00:15:47,712
Yes. Gavin Belson is a prick.
385
00:15:47,747 --> 00:15:48,846
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
386
00:15:48,882 --> 00:15:51,549
He's a... he's a total...
387
00:15:51,584 --> 00:15:54,428
- fucking prick.
- Wait, where are you going?
388
00:15:54,987 --> 00:15:56,687
How could it be this crowded?
389
00:15:56,723 --> 00:15:58,155
Burning Man's in two weeks,
390
00:15:58,190 --> 00:16:00,409
so people are beta testing their new gear.
391
00:16:00,727 --> 00:16:02,960
Why would people who aren't refugees
392
00:16:02,995 --> 00:16:05,271
choose to come here and live like refugees?
393
00:16:05,464 --> 00:16:07,631
You know that's not, like,
a desirable thing, right?
394
00:16:07,666 --> 00:16:09,466
Living like a refugee? Ugh!
395
00:16:09,501 --> 00:16:11,823
This place is offensive to homeless people.
396
00:16:12,771 --> 00:16:14,449
- Hello?
- Hello, Gavin?
397
00:16:14,450 --> 00:16:17,283
It's Richard Hendricks. Richard Hendricks.
398
00:16:18,910 --> 00:16:20,317
- Mind the glass.
- Yeah.
399
00:16:21,787 --> 00:16:23,921
Oh. It's all smashed up again.
400
00:16:24,422 --> 00:16:25,754
What do you want, Richard?
401
00:16:27,458 --> 00:16:28,424
I need your help.
402
00:16:28,459 --> 00:16:29,525
Look, my network is in trouble.
403
00:16:29,560 --> 00:16:31,961
And I know that deep down,
in your heart, what you...
404
00:16:31,996 --> 00:16:33,861
Oh, for fuck's sake.
You're not gonna give me
405
00:16:33,897 --> 00:16:35,330
another one of your inspirational,
406
00:16:35,365 --> 00:16:37,799
in defense of great
technology speeches, are you?
407
00:16:37,834 --> 00:16:39,401
Stand up and fight for innovation,
408
00:16:39,436 --> 00:16:40,468
that kind of bullshit?
409
00:16:40,503 --> 00:16:42,326
No. Exactly the opposite.
410
00:16:43,201 --> 00:16:45,807
I happen to know that a man named Yao
411
00:16:45,842 --> 00:16:47,069
fucked you over.
412
00:16:47,777 --> 00:16:49,477
How would you like to fuck him back?
413
00:16:50,483 --> 00:16:51,579
I'm listening.
414
00:16:51,614 --> 00:16:53,164
I need you to attack me.
415
00:16:55,652 --> 00:16:57,318
John? It's Gavin Belson.
416
00:16:57,353 --> 00:16:59,554
Oh. Hello.
417
00:16:59,589 --> 00:17:01,789
Listen, John. Do we
still have the prototypes
418
00:17:01,825 --> 00:17:03,825
of my Signature Box Three strung up?
419
00:17:04,961 --> 00:17:06,160
Yeah.
420
00:17:08,064 --> 00:17:10,430
They told us they were
gonna send more, but...
421
00:17:11,501 --> 00:17:12,737
they never did.
422
00:17:12,738 --> 00:17:13,936
Well, that's a long story.
423
00:17:16,135 --> 00:17:18,402
- I got time.
- Yeah, listen, John...
424
00:17:18,703 --> 00:17:21,505
I need you to give admin
access to Richard Hendricks.
425
00:17:22,158 --> 00:17:23,774
Becky, did you run connection throttling
426
00:17:23,810 --> 00:17:25,609
on the latest batch of device IDs?
427
00:17:25,894 --> 00:17:27,678
Yes. You know why?
428
00:17:27,713 --> 00:17:28,894
I'm not a moron.
429
00:17:29,214 --> 00:17:31,181
Oh, I see. I'm the asshole.
430
00:17:31,216 --> 00:17:32,230
Really?
431
00:17:32,255 --> 00:17:33,650
You really wanna have this conversation?
432
00:17:33,685 --> 00:17:34,830
You're both assholes.
433
00:17:35,321 --> 00:17:37,454
Shut the fuck up.
434
00:17:38,719 --> 00:17:40,148
The fuck does it matter.
435
00:17:40,359 --> 00:17:42,692
We're never gonna finish
this patch in time, anyway.
436
00:17:44,563 --> 00:17:46,498
Wait, what the fuck...
437
00:17:46,999 --> 00:17:48,298
just happened?
438
00:17:50,936 --> 00:17:52,869
Dick, where are you?
439
00:17:52,904 --> 00:17:54,004
I'm at Gavin's.
440
00:17:54,039 --> 00:17:55,505
I just gave his boxes permission
441
00:17:55,540 --> 00:17:57,307
to mimic a shit-ton of
phones on our network.
442
00:17:57,343 --> 00:17:58,808
A second attack.
443
00:17:58,844 --> 00:17:59,909
Yes, exactly.
444
00:17:59,945 --> 00:18:03,077
Now Yao can't get to 51%.
Where are we with the patch?
445
00:18:03,797 --> 00:18:05,246
Close, but you do realize
446
00:18:05,283 --> 00:18:06,949
that now that we're below 51%,
447
00:18:06,985 --> 00:18:08,750
we can't deploy it.
448
00:18:08,786 --> 00:18:10,052
For now, we can't win.
449
00:18:10,088 --> 00:18:13,030
But since Gavin is holding
off Yao, we can't lose either.
450
00:18:13,366 --> 00:18:14,669
He just bought us some time.
451
00:18:15,137 --> 00:18:16,500
Okay, I'll see you in a bit.
452
00:18:16,757 --> 00:18:18,624
Well, Gavin, thank you very much.
453
00:18:18,659 --> 00:18:21,711
You just gave me and my
guys a fighting chance.
454
00:18:22,075 --> 00:18:23,529
Is that what just happened here, Richard?
455
00:18:23,564 --> 00:18:24,763
Yes.
456
00:18:25,699 --> 00:18:27,375
- No?
- Seems to me,
457
00:18:27,446 --> 00:18:29,979
you are the one that just
gave me a fighting chance.
458
00:18:30,838 --> 00:18:31,868
Ni hao.
459
00:18:32,106 --> 00:18:34,240
It's Gavin Belson for Mr. Yao.
460
00:18:34,275 --> 00:18:36,141
What the fuck are you doing?
461
00:18:37,287 --> 00:18:39,069
This is the last road, Dinesh.
462
00:18:39,756 --> 00:18:40,887
He's not here.
463
00:18:43,727 --> 00:18:47,228
Colin! Colin!
464
00:18:47,263 --> 00:18:48,597
Will you shut the fuck up?
465
00:18:48,632 --> 00:18:50,632
How would you like to
die today, motherfucker?
466
00:18:50,667 --> 00:18:52,521
No, it's not a real death threat, sir.
467
00:18:52,930 --> 00:18:54,669
I'm sorry. I'm just stressed.
468
00:18:54,705 --> 00:18:56,270
Shut up for a second. You hear that?
469
00:19:11,253 --> 00:19:14,321
So, you want us to
delete all of our phones?
470
00:19:14,356 --> 00:19:16,123
Right now, we're in a standoff.
471
00:19:16,158 --> 00:19:19,396
You can't win, but if you back off, I can.
472
00:19:19,528 --> 00:19:21,161
I have more devices than anyone,
473
00:19:21,196 --> 00:19:22,663
I will reach 51%,
474
00:19:22,698 --> 00:19:24,431
and take control of this
little shit's network.
475
00:19:24,466 --> 00:19:25,833
You know, can I chime in here?
476
00:19:25,868 --> 00:19:29,193
I actually think that
this is a bad idea, and...
477
00:19:30,305 --> 00:19:32,640
In exchange for deleting
your principal competition,
478
00:19:32,675 --> 00:19:34,508
I'm simply asking for a partnership
479
00:19:34,543 --> 00:19:36,110
between your venture and Hooli.
480
00:19:36,145 --> 00:19:38,549
Well, he's actually leaving
Hooli. They're firing him.
481
00:19:38,648 --> 00:19:40,281
So I don't know where
the connection could...
482
00:19:40,317 --> 00:19:41,849
For fuck's sake.
483
00:19:41,884 --> 00:19:43,506
I'm sure my board would find
484
00:19:43,507 --> 00:19:46,039
an arrangement between YaoNet and Hooli
485
00:19:46,074 --> 00:19:48,008
vastly preferable to fire sale-ing
486
00:19:48,043 --> 00:19:49,630
the company to Jeff Bezos.
487
00:19:49,811 --> 00:19:51,178
My proposal is I help you,
488
00:19:51,213 --> 00:19:53,580
in exchange for a 20%
stake in your venture.
489
00:19:53,616 --> 00:19:55,081
And I have a counterproposal,
490
00:19:55,117 --> 00:19:59,045
that you do not do that.
491
00:19:59,188 --> 00:20:00,310
Gavin...
492
00:20:01,723 --> 00:20:03,157
How do we proceed?
493
00:20:04,527 --> 00:20:05,626
Because...
494
00:20:06,928 --> 00:20:07,997
We like it.
495
00:20:12,568 --> 00:20:15,072
_
496
00:20:15,096 --> 00:20:16,900
_
497
00:20:17,736 --> 00:20:20,033
_
498
00:20:43,531 --> 00:20:45,665
Hey, guys. What are you doing here?
499
00:20:45,902 --> 00:20:47,926
- We tried calling you.
- A hundred times.
500
00:20:47,927 --> 00:20:50,027
Yeah, I'm off the grid.
501
00:20:50,062 --> 00:20:51,160
And...
502
00:20:52,597 --> 00:20:53,596
Done.
503
00:20:53,879 --> 00:20:55,544
All right, so the patch is ready?
504
00:20:55,569 --> 00:20:56,731
Indeed.
505
00:20:57,000 --> 00:20:58,972
Now, maybe someday,
506
00:20:59,007 --> 00:21:01,107
Dark Lord willing, we'll
actually get to deploy...
507
00:21:01,143 --> 00:21:02,208
Boo-yah!
508
00:21:02,233 --> 00:21:04,206
We just crushed the patch, Pipers!
509
00:21:04,216 --> 00:21:06,983
Holden, give me that
fucking mallet right now!
510
00:21:07,135 --> 00:21:09,241
- Drop it!
- Wait, what the fuck?
511
00:21:14,359 --> 00:21:16,559
Care to tell me what
the fuck is going on now?
512
00:21:16,594 --> 00:21:17,828
Gavin is fucking us.
513
00:21:17,863 --> 00:21:19,595
He just convinced Yao to pull his phones.
514
00:21:19,631 --> 00:21:20,997
What the fuck is that noise?
515
00:21:21,900 --> 00:21:23,333
Gavin's making ice cream.
516
00:21:23,368 --> 00:21:24,667
- Fuck.
- Yeah.
517
00:21:24,703 --> 00:21:26,542
- Can you kill his devices?
- No, I can't.
518
00:21:26,543 --> 00:21:28,248
He just had his server guy lock me out.
519
00:21:28,511 --> 00:21:29,777
Look, we need Colin.
520
00:21:29,812 --> 00:21:32,579
We need "Galloo," now.
521
00:21:32,720 --> 00:21:35,602
All right, well, it's a pretty
straight road from here, so...
522
00:21:35,889 --> 00:21:38,054
Hold on to your kidneys, motherfuckers!
523
00:21:38,055 --> 00:21:40,821
We are going Ludicrous!
524
00:21:42,655 --> 00:21:43,791
What the fuck?
525
00:21:45,562 --> 00:21:47,328
Oh. What?
526
00:21:47,364 --> 00:21:49,830
Valet mode. You put me
in fucking valet mode.
527
00:21:49,866 --> 00:21:51,799
You wrecked your Tesla.
You're not wrecking mine.
528
00:21:51,834 --> 00:21:54,721
Come on, that caps me at 70
miles per hour, limits performance
529
00:21:54,746 --> 00:21:55,792
to 80 kilowatts.
530
00:21:55,817 --> 00:21:58,587
Come on, you have to let
me do Ludicrous Mode, now!
531
00:21:58,642 --> 00:22:00,275
I've been a total gentleman about this.
532
00:22:00,310 --> 00:22:01,368
I have Colin!
533
00:22:01,588 --> 00:22:02,943
I want two more months of payments.
534
00:22:03,664 --> 00:22:04,745
One more month.
535
00:22:05,631 --> 00:22:07,987
Fine. Do not crash.
536
00:22:10,851 --> 00:22:12,154
Here we go.
537
00:22:12,514 --> 00:22:13,576
Three...
538
00:22:13,823 --> 00:22:14,822
two...
539
00:22:14,857 --> 00:22:15,956
one...
540
00:22:24,405 --> 00:22:28,335
We've got all 63 distributed
systems engineers on the job, Gavin.
541
00:22:28,370 --> 00:22:31,143
The patch you asked for is nearly finished.
542
00:22:31,540 --> 00:22:34,675
Wonderful. Call me when we hit 51%.
543
00:22:37,613 --> 00:22:39,879
Hey, Richard. I know
what might cheer you up.
544
00:22:39,915 --> 00:22:41,315
How about a little ice cream?
545
00:22:43,251 --> 00:22:45,151
Come on, guys. Where the fuck are you?
546
00:22:46,922 --> 00:22:48,121
Well, this is fucked.
547
00:22:48,156 --> 00:22:50,457
I heard on a podcast that patrol men
548
00:22:50,492 --> 00:22:53,627
are actually a lot more tempted
by bribes than you might think.
549
00:22:55,798 --> 00:22:57,263
Officer, hi.
550
00:22:57,461 --> 00:23:00,215
Is there anything I can
do to make this all...
551
00:23:01,333 --> 00:23:02,464
go away?
552
00:23:03,349 --> 00:23:05,669
Sir, I would think very carefully
553
00:23:05,705 --> 00:23:07,803
about the next words that
come out of your mouth.
554
00:23:10,610 --> 00:23:11,776
Oh, shit.
555
00:23:13,678 --> 00:23:15,478
Well, look at that.
556
00:23:15,514 --> 00:23:16,734
51%.
557
00:23:17,446 --> 00:23:18,670
Yeah, Scott?
558
00:23:19,351 --> 00:23:20,517
Yes, I know.
559
00:23:20,552 --> 00:23:21,719
I just saw.
560
00:23:22,288 --> 00:23:24,350
No, not yet. Hold on a moment.
561
00:23:28,327 --> 00:23:29,359
Gavin.
562
00:23:29,528 --> 00:23:30,693
What is our status?
563
00:23:30,729 --> 00:23:32,495
Friends, I'm about to delete
564
00:23:32,531 --> 00:23:34,280
Mr. Hendricks' life's work.
565
00:23:34,645 --> 00:23:36,176
I thought you'd wanna see it happen.
566
00:23:36,802 --> 00:23:38,468
Richard, was that too mean?
567
00:23:39,219 --> 00:23:41,367
Oh, well. Should we get to it?
568
00:23:42,702 --> 00:23:44,061
- Scott...
- Wait.
569
00:23:46,245 --> 00:23:48,609
Take it. Just take it.
570
00:23:49,013 --> 00:23:50,079
Take what?
571
00:23:50,114 --> 00:23:51,184
Pied Piper.
572
00:23:51,817 --> 00:23:53,316
The whole network. All of it.
573
00:23:53,351 --> 00:23:55,010
Just please don't destroy it.
574
00:23:56,120 --> 00:23:57,921
I'd rather give it away than watch it die.
575
00:23:59,157 --> 00:24:01,691
As much as I hate to admit,
576
00:24:01,726 --> 00:24:03,961
who better to take it than you, Gavin?
577
00:24:05,029 --> 00:24:08,431
I mean, you're really the only one
578
00:24:08,467 --> 00:24:11,634
who realizes what the
decentralized Internet could be.
579
00:24:11,670 --> 00:24:14,403
I find this uninteresting. Can we proceed?
580
00:24:14,439 --> 00:24:16,305
You wrote the patent and gave it to me.
581
00:24:16,341 --> 00:24:20,048
Hell, you hired the best 63 distributed
systems engineers in the city.
582
00:24:20,378 --> 00:24:23,149
I mean, you could build this
583
00:24:23,202 --> 00:24:24,613
into what it was meant to be.
584
00:24:24,648 --> 00:24:25,647
Gavin, enough.
585
00:24:26,070 --> 00:24:28,149
Come on, you know that my network
586
00:24:28,185 --> 00:24:30,472
is way better than some knockoff.
587
00:24:30,688 --> 00:24:32,954
And instead of taking a
minority stake in their company,
588
00:24:33,272 --> 00:24:35,205
you could take total control of mine.
589
00:24:36,433 --> 00:24:37,741
Why would you turn that down?
590
00:24:37,905 --> 00:24:39,704
Let's make it official. I will, uh...
591
00:24:41,732 --> 00:24:44,509
I will sign my company
592
00:24:44,557 --> 00:24:45,778
over to you.
593
00:24:46,003 --> 00:24:47,836
It's yours, Gavin. You win.
594
00:24:49,521 --> 00:24:50,595
Okay?
595
00:24:50,941 --> 00:24:53,575
Take it. Just please don't delete it.
596
00:24:53,611 --> 00:24:55,116
All our phones are turned off, now.
597
00:24:55,141 --> 00:24:58,713
Gavin, delete Pied Piper
immediately or we will walk away.
598
00:24:59,582 --> 00:25:01,182
Not if I walk away first.
599
00:25:02,252 --> 00:25:03,946
Sorry, but this gives me all the cards.
600
00:25:04,121 --> 00:25:05,270
I get Hooli back.
601
00:25:05,389 --> 00:25:08,756
Fuck Bezos and fuck you and your 20% offer.
602
00:25:08,791 --> 00:25:10,917
And fuck the Signature Box Three.
603
00:25:11,032 --> 00:25:12,627
I get a complete do-over.
604
00:25:12,662 --> 00:25:14,729
Tim Cook keeps inviting me to his brunches.
605
00:25:14,764 --> 00:25:15,830
Fuck him!
606
00:25:15,865 --> 00:25:17,763
I'll host the fucking brunches.
607
00:25:18,168 --> 00:25:20,402
All because Mr. Hendricks here
608
00:25:20,437 --> 00:25:21,528
was kind enough to...
609
00:25:22,239 --> 00:25:23,341
Sorry, what does this say?
610
00:25:23,907 --> 00:25:25,432
- Kiss my...
- Piss.
611
00:25:27,344 --> 00:25:28,860
Kiss my piss.
612
00:25:30,380 --> 00:25:31,856
Kiss my piss.
613
00:25:34,313 --> 00:25:36,316
Richard, please stop the
movement. Kiss my piss.
614
00:25:36,352 --> 00:25:38,052
- I find it annoying.
- Kiss my piss.
615
00:25:38,087 --> 00:25:39,486
Yes, we don't like it.
616
00:25:39,522 --> 00:25:40,852
What the fuck are you doing, Richard?
617
00:25:40,887 --> 00:25:43,520
What does it look like?
I'm fucking you over, Gavin.
618
00:25:43,556 --> 00:25:45,551
- You're what?
- I was stalling!
619
00:25:46,431 --> 00:25:47,960
_
620
00:25:47,985 --> 00:25:50,161
"Galloo"? What the fuck is "Galloo"?
621
00:25:50,196 --> 00:25:53,254
Kaboom. You just got 80,000 new users.
622
00:25:53,867 --> 00:25:55,196
Oh! Yes.
623
00:25:57,636 --> 00:25:59,532
Scott. Run the patch.
624
00:25:59,805 --> 00:26:00,844
It's not working.
625
00:26:00,845 --> 00:26:02,737
We've lost control of the network.
626
00:26:03,646 --> 00:26:04,760
Gilfoyle...
627
00:26:05,814 --> 00:26:06,992
when you're ready.
628
00:26:08,584 --> 00:26:09,716
Bombs away.
629
00:26:17,693 --> 00:26:18,992
What the fuck just happened?
630
00:26:26,735 --> 00:26:28,536
Colin, you did it. You saved us.
631
00:26:28,571 --> 00:26:30,438
No. That was all Dinesh.
632
00:26:30,473 --> 00:26:32,471
That was quick fucking
thinking with that cop.
633
00:26:32,496 --> 00:26:33,415
Yeah.
634
00:26:35,844 --> 00:26:38,598
Yeah!
635
00:26:39,147 --> 00:26:40,646
Holden! Get the fuck down!
636
00:26:40,682 --> 00:26:41,770
Monica.
637
00:26:43,565 --> 00:26:44,831
- Cheers.
- For me?
638
00:26:44,856 --> 00:26:46,089
Yeah!
639
00:26:46,221 --> 00:26:47,885
You saw our coin price, right?
640
00:26:48,615 --> 00:26:49,889
It's going up.
641
00:26:49,924 --> 00:26:51,329
Well, look at that.
642
00:26:51,526 --> 00:26:52,798
Come on!
643
00:26:53,851 --> 00:26:55,316
Jared finally broke him.
644
00:26:55,929 --> 00:26:57,499
- Get it!
- Yeah.
645
00:27:00,692 --> 00:27:01,889
I like you.
646
00:27:04,600 --> 00:27:05,728
Not in a...
647
00:27:06,713 --> 00:27:08,045
Fuck yeah!
648
00:27:10,589 --> 00:27:12,096
- Yeah.
- You understand what I'm saying.
649
00:27:12,121 --> 00:27:13,113
Sure.
650
00:27:13,138 --> 00:27:14,605
Come on, don't be assholes.
651
00:27:14,630 --> 00:27:15,696
We can still do our deal.
652
00:27:15,721 --> 00:27:17,053
You still need an American partner
653
00:27:17,078 --> 00:27:18,244
for your network, don't you?
654
00:27:18,269 --> 00:27:21,148
I believe we are now entitled
to explore other options.
655
00:27:21,149 --> 00:27:22,377
Thanks for the help, Gavin.
656
00:27:22,683 --> 00:27:24,721
And, uh, thanks for the ice cream.
657
00:27:29,535 --> 00:27:31,930
We will tell Jeff Bezos you say hello.
658
00:27:32,692 --> 00:27:34,551
- Yes?
- Yes.
659
00:27:35,929 --> 00:27:36,917
Yes.
660
00:27:44,270 --> 00:27:45,837
Fuck!
661
00:27:48,975 --> 00:27:50,896
And we'd be right up here.
662
00:27:51,077 --> 00:27:53,623
- Ooh! Love the video fireplace.
- Yeah.
663
00:27:56,683 --> 00:27:59,006
Wow. It's magnificent.
664
00:27:59,185 --> 00:28:00,287
It's a little bright.
665
00:28:00,418 --> 00:28:03,195
But I could find a dark
corner to settle into.
666
00:28:05,256 --> 00:28:06,268
It's great.
667
00:28:06,752 --> 00:28:08,123
When do these guys move out?
668
00:28:08,158 --> 00:28:09,458
Oh, no, this isn't our space.
669
00:28:09,493 --> 00:28:11,174
We're actually right through here.
670
00:28:17,235 --> 00:28:18,387
Here we go.
671
00:28:19,900 --> 00:28:21,066
What do you guys think?
672
00:28:21,123 --> 00:28:22,611
Uh, I'm sorry.
673
00:28:22,658 --> 00:28:24,858
What part of this would we be renting?
674
00:28:24,894 --> 00:28:26,031
All of it.
675
00:28:26,329 --> 00:28:27,289
What?
676
00:28:27,530 --> 00:28:29,863
Yeah, we're signing
new developers every day.
677
00:28:29,899 --> 00:28:32,399
That's gonna require hundreds
of new engineers, Richard.
678
00:28:32,434 --> 00:28:34,001
And the staff to support them.
679
00:28:34,340 --> 00:28:37,362
Legal, accounting, HR, government affairs.
680
00:28:37,363 --> 00:28:38,795
Whoa. Why would we need that?
681
00:28:39,021 --> 00:28:40,951
To deal with things like the NSA.
682
00:28:40,952 --> 00:28:41,955
They called yesterday.
683
00:28:41,990 --> 00:28:43,920
They have a lot of
questions about our tech.
684
00:28:44,024 --> 00:28:45,805
And about inserting a back door.
685
00:28:46,170 --> 00:28:47,316
We can push back.
686
00:28:47,343 --> 00:28:48,356
Against the government?
687
00:28:48,357 --> 00:28:50,322
- I don't love that.
- I do.
688
00:28:50,646 --> 00:28:52,246
Do you guys wanna see the second floor?
689
00:28:52,271 --> 00:28:53,216
There's another floor?
690
00:28:53,241 --> 00:28:54,515
There's three more, actually.
691
00:28:54,516 --> 00:28:56,049
This all used to be part of Hooli.
692
00:28:56,791 --> 00:28:57,823
Okay.
693
00:29:00,993 --> 00:29:02,014
Whoa!
694
00:29:02,556 --> 00:29:04,323
I know. It's exciting, right?
695
00:30:02,966 --> 00:30:04,466
Thank you!
48208
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