Original subtitles

As all of questers know, every warrior is only as great

as their greatest weapon.

And I, Lana Longbeard, have the greatest weapon of all.

Sorry, were you saying something?

I'm just so into this new issue of "The Confounder".

He's the superhero whose power is-

I'm gonna guess solving puzzles.

Yeah.

I was just gonna say, my boomerang is the coolest.

Check out this new trick I've been working on.

Hey, those were mine, but, impressive.

Right? And it can do this too.

Gross, but also impressive.

Yep. It's the only weapon I'll ever need.

Oh, Lana!

Guess what? I've decided you're finally ready for me to

pass on the only weapon you'll ever need...the mighty hammer!

Uh, thanks, dad, but I've already got my boomerang.

What, that toy?

You mean versus that toy?

This is a training hammer. But after a little practice,

you'll be ready to wield a hammer as mighty as mine.

Because you couldn't possibly want anything other than

to be exactly like me, right?

Ha...ha...

Gather around, Mighty crew. We have a quest.

We shall journey to the Isle of the Arachno Spider Queen,

make our way through her temple,

and steal her precious Amulet of Web Weaving!

Woah. Epic quest, dad.

Right? But also, the Amulet makes the strongest silk thread

in the Ten Realms, and we really need it to repair our sails,

which have seen better days.

Plus, it'll be a great opportunity for me to teach you

a few of my signature hammer moves, eh, Lana?

Your hammer is cool and everything, dad,

but maybe it's more your thing than mine.

Nonsense. The hammer is our thing.

Every Longbeard Captain has wielded one for centuries.

So why fix something that ain't broke?

Unlike our sails, which are very broke.

So let's move, people!

Why do you need a weapon at all?

Not all of us have orc strength, Bo.

You don't need orc strength when you use your brain.

That's all The Confounder needs. And that's all I'm gonna need

to get past the puzzles in the Temple of the Arachno Queen.

A sharp mind is the most powerful weapon of all.

Can your mind do that?

Those are still mine, but point taken.

I call this one, "Monster Mauler"!

And this one, "Ghoul Grinder"!

And this one's the "Demon Destroyer"!

So I take it your dad still isn't

taking your boomerang seriously?

All he cares about is that dinky old training hammer,

which is why I left it on the ship with Sprog.

After today, my dad will see that my boomerang

is just as mighty as the hammer!

And this one I call: "Gentle Summer Rain".

Just kidding! It's called the "Enemy Annihilator"!

Ah, the Temple of the Arachno Queen. Just as I remember it.

You've been here before, Hugo?

Uh...no clue.

Locked!

According to these markings, you have to

solve a puzzle to open it. Step aside, everyone.

The Confounder is about to prove the power of brain over brawn!

Haha!

I see what you mean about using brain power.

Aww.

Hugo's a little headstrong. Don't worry,

you'll crack the code next time.

Watch where you step.

Temples like these are filled with booby traps.

Huh. Wonder what this button does.

On second thought, the picture was pretty

self explanatory.

There could be danger lurking around every corner.

Take out your training hammer and do as I do.

No prob, Dad. Only I'll use my boomerang instead.

What? That weird bendy stick of yours?

Where's your mighty hammer?

Mighty? More like moldy. It's covered in rust.

That's cuz it's a classic! I used it when I was your age.

Well, I'm gonna use my boomerang.

Can't you just let me show you my latest trick?

No. You're a Longbeard, and Longbeards wield hammers.

You won't be needing this anymore.

Now look what you've done!

Me? You're the one who threw my boomerang. And if you would

just listen to me, you'd know it always comes back.

Aha! These markings on the floor! It's another puzzle!

If I can solve it, the walls will stop closing in.

If five people enter a giant spider's lair and set off a

series of booby traps, only three people make it out of the-

Bo!

Zero people will make it out if you don't help us.

Fine.

Well, that was close.

Wonder what this button does.

On second thought, the picture was pretty self explanatory.

Oh, great. Now we'll never find it.

There it is.

The Amulet of Web Weaving!

There are markings on that plinth!

Looks like another puzzle that needs solving, or else--

Your puzzle solving nonsense has been just as

helpful as Lana's bendy stick nonsense.

Could we please just listen to me,

A.K.A. the Captain, A.K.A. the person who always knows best.

The person who always knows best, huh?

Longbeards, attack!

Get off me!

The spider silk is too strong to break!

I am devastated.

Hey, dad! Can your precious hammer do this?

Child's play!

Can your bendy stick do this move or this move?

Well, how about this move?

Those are all the same move!

How dare you? And after I gave you Lil Hammykins!

That's the training hammer's name.

You know, I always thought you

wanted to follow in my footsteps and be just like me!

Well, maybe I don't!

Oh, dad. I just meant that--

The Arachno Queen!

Ahhh! Humans!

Gross! Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! Ew! Yucky!

Shoo! Shoo! Ew! Get away, get away, get away!

Look out! Take the Amulet, go help the others,

and get out of here! I'll keep her busy.

What!? I'm not just leaving you!

Can't you do as I say this one time? Now go!

We're gonna be stuck here forever. We've tried everything.

Not everything, Bo. Look at these markings.

Another puzzle! You think it can help us?

I sure hope so, Confounder.

It's a riddle. "What's lighter than air, but stronger

"than steel, and is flat or a triangle or round like a wheel?"

A sprite's wish? Sprog's burps? A Flap Shack pancake?

Spider silk!

For brain power!

You did it, Confounder!

Stronger than steel, huh?

Oh, gross, gross, gross!

I thought I had this place human-proofed!

Give up, Arachno Queen! You'll never defeat the Mighty--

Woah!

Now you'll stop squirming everywhere.

Hey! That's my dad!

Lana, what are you doing here? I told you to go.

I'm sorry for what I said before. I do wanna

follow in your footsteps, dad, but I wanna do it my own way.

And just like my boomerang, I always come back.

Let's do this, Lil Boomykins!

Humans are the worst!

Lana, amazing moves!

You're a Longbeard through and through!

Whether you use a hammer or a--

- A weird bendy stick? - I was gonna say boomerang.

Mind if we borrow your Amulet of Web Weaving, Your Majesty?

Ew! It's talking to me! Just take it!

Take it! Shoo! Shoo! Shoo!

Gross! Gross! Gross!

Really? The hammer? This mean you're giving up the boomerang?

No way! The boomerang's my signature weapon.

But that doesn't mean I can't try out the hammer as well.

My dad's learning some new tricks too.

Yah!

Whoops! I'm still in training, Sorry! I'll get there.