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This programme contains very
strong language from the start
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{\an8}♪ I've got to tell you my tale
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{\an8}♪ Of how I loved and how I failed
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♪ I hope you understand... ♪
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Sorry, we're closed for
a private function.
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Well, tell them I'm staff.
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Look, my boyfriend sucks,
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and I need to drink
to forget he exists.
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That way, when I next see him,
it will be a nice surprise.
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Uh...
We went to see The Hangover II,
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and afterwards, all I said was
that men aren't as funny
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00:00:30,320 --> 00:00:32,199
as they think they are,
and he kicked off.
13
00:00:32,200 --> 00:00:33,919
Why are men so wet?
14
00:00:33,920 --> 00:00:35,760
Why is it so fucking quiet in here?
15
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You're at a wake.
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Fuck!
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00:00:43,600 --> 00:00:45,799
Wasn't anyone young or important,
was it?
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Nah, just my dad.
19
00:00:48,480 --> 00:00:49,759
Oh, my God.
20
00:00:49,760 --> 00:00:52,119
Oh, Eddie, I am so sorry
for your loss.
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You know
your dad loved you so much.
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Thanks, Auntie Bebs.
23
00:00:55,520 --> 00:00:57,000
He was always so proud of you.
24
00:00:59,120 --> 00:01:00,479
Oh, would you like a...?
25
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Double Jack and Coke, please, babes.
26
00:01:02,200 --> 00:01:04,000
I'll bring it over. Oh, thank you.
27
00:01:06,840 --> 00:01:08,559
I have crashed a funeral.
28
00:01:08,560 --> 00:01:11,199
I think it's called a wake
if there's booze.
29
00:01:11,200 --> 00:01:13,359
You don't happen to have
any kind of trap door
30
00:01:13,360 --> 00:01:15,679
you could open beneath me, or...?
31
00:01:15,680 --> 00:01:17,519
This isn't going to work.
32
00:01:17,520 --> 00:01:20,399
A highlights reel of our friendship
isn't going to make everything OK.
33
00:01:20,400 --> 00:01:22,159
I know, I know,
it's more complicated than...
34
00:01:22,160 --> 00:01:23,999
The fact that the way we met
is funny and adorable doesn't mean
35
00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:25,839
that we're supposed to be
in each other's lives forever.
36
00:01:25,840 --> 00:01:27,080
I know, Eddie.
37
00:01:29,240 --> 00:01:31,120
Wh... Why don't you just sit?
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00:01:35,600 --> 00:01:36,800
Just... One sec.
39
00:01:51,280 --> 00:01:53,600
It's just the glass - it's not safe.
40
00:01:57,280 --> 00:01:58,880
SHE CHUCKLES
Oh, my God!
41
00:02:02,720 --> 00:02:04,679
Is that from when Ryan was
in his...?
42
00:02:04,680 --> 00:02:07,639
Woo!
♪ You're my white tiger... ♪
43
00:02:07,640 --> 00:02:08,719
Ooh! Whoa!
44
00:02:08,720 --> 00:02:09,879
Argh!
CRASH!
45
00:02:09,880 --> 00:02:10,919
Ooh, fuck!
46
00:02:10,920 --> 00:02:12,079
...Starlight Express era?
47
00:02:12,080 --> 00:02:13,959
I'm going to stay with Jay.
No, Eddie, Jay's...
48
00:02:13,960 --> 00:02:16,800
Jay moved to Arizona
to prepare for the apocalypse.
49
00:02:20,160 --> 00:02:21,719
Can I please borrow your phone?
50
00:02:21,720 --> 00:02:23,639
I need to google
"free accommodation, London".
51
00:02:23,640 --> 00:02:25,239
Well, that is a one-way ticket
to sex trafficking,
52
00:02:25,240 --> 00:02:26,480
so I'm going to say no.
53
00:02:29,600 --> 00:02:31,080
You promised me one night. I...
54
00:02:44,240 --> 00:02:45,720
SHE SIGHS
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00:02:51,720 --> 00:02:53,479
BUCKET CLATTERS
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00:02:53,480 --> 00:02:55,600
GLASS TINKLES
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"Of all the old-man
pubs
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00:03:05,880 --> 00:03:08,159
"in all of mid-recession Dalston,
59
00:03:08,160 --> 00:03:09,799
"I walked into yours."
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00:03:09,800 --> 00:03:11,759
You realise my dad's wake
might not be
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00:03:11,760 --> 00:03:13,639
the hilarious memory
that you think it is.
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00:03:13,640 --> 00:03:14,879
Oh...
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00:03:14,880 --> 00:03:16,239
I wasn't the one laughing.
64
00:03:16,240 --> 00:03:18,279
SHE LAUGHS
65
00:03:18,280 --> 00:03:20,439
Ohh...!
66
00:03:20,440 --> 00:03:23,479
So, what I'm going to do
is quietly and respectfully
67
00:03:23,480 --> 00:03:26,119
tiptoe out of here,
and you never have to see me again.
68
00:03:26,120 --> 00:03:27,319
I don't think so.
69
00:03:27,320 --> 00:03:28,719
It'll just look weird
if you leave so quickly.
70
00:03:28,720 --> 00:03:29,839
Oh, come on, I...
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00:03:29,840 --> 00:03:31,159
You need to work on
your mourner persona.
72
00:03:31,160 --> 00:03:32,759
Are you a relative?
73
00:03:32,760 --> 00:03:34,119
Ooh, secret family!
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00:03:34,120 --> 00:03:36,839
Uh, er, maybe I could be
75
00:03:36,840 --> 00:03:39,400
like a young runaway
your dad took in.
76
00:03:40,680 --> 00:03:43,479
God, sorry, it's really hard
to work with the age difference.
77
00:03:43,480 --> 00:03:45,599
I haven't laughed in so long.
78
00:03:45,600 --> 00:03:47,239
My face actually hurts.
79
00:03:47,240 --> 00:03:49,240
SHE CHUCKLES
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00:03:54,200 --> 00:03:55,360
Ooh.
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00:04:01,760 --> 00:04:03,399
I have always depended
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00:04:03,400 --> 00:04:05,599
on the kindness of strangers.
SHE LAUGHS
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00:04:05,600 --> 00:04:07,719
Theodora! And it's over.
84
00:04:07,720 --> 00:04:10,639
Theodora, my glass has been empty
for an hour.
85
00:04:10,640 --> 00:04:12,919
I wish you'd go around
to do top-ups.
86
00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:14,679
I'm actually at my father's wake
87
00:04:14,680 --> 00:04:16,039
in more of a personal capacity,
88
00:04:16,040 --> 00:04:17,879
as much as I valued him
as an employer.
89
00:04:17,880 --> 00:04:19,439
But you're welcome to do it.
90
00:04:19,440 --> 00:04:20,759
Or Jay.
91
00:04:20,760 --> 00:04:22,679
No, your brother needed
to get back to work
92
00:04:22,680 --> 00:04:24,039
before the US markets open,
93
00:04:24,040 --> 00:04:27,120
and I need to be available
for people, Eddie, I...
94
00:04:28,600 --> 00:04:29,959
...am the widow.
95
00:04:29,960 --> 00:04:31,639
You divorced him 15 years ago.
96
00:04:31,640 --> 00:04:32,920
Who's this?
97
00:04:34,240 --> 00:04:35,999
Uh... Maureen Johnson.
98
00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:38,239
I'm a good friend of... the deceased.
99
00:04:38,240 --> 00:04:39,359
Cam.
SHE CLEARS THROAT
100
00:04:39,360 --> 00:04:40,519
Cam.
101
00:04:40,520 --> 00:04:42,959
The Deceased was his golf nickname.
102
00:04:42,960 --> 00:04:44,399
Cameron didn't play golf.
103
00:04:44,400 --> 00:04:46,719
Funny,
he never mentioned an ex-wife.
104
00:04:46,720 --> 00:04:49,440
Not once in all our... golf times.
105
00:04:50,480 --> 00:04:51,480
Well...
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00:04:53,000 --> 00:04:56,559
Ooh, brave to go after my mum.
We've just met.
107
00:04:56,560 --> 00:04:57,919
Are you two close?
108
00:04:57,920 --> 00:04:59,479
Like sisters!
SHE CHUCKLES
109
00:04:59,480 --> 00:05:01,959
Buffet emergency.
Sorry, but we are headed
110
00:05:01,960 --> 00:05:04,679
straight for a sausage roll drought,
Eddie.
111
00:05:04,680 --> 00:05:06,639
Now, I can go to the big Sains...
112
00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:08,399
No, it wasn't sausage rolls. No?
113
00:05:08,400 --> 00:05:10,039
No. Dad hated sausage rolls.
114
00:05:10,040 --> 00:05:12,119
He said they looked like flaky
dicks. It was...
115
00:05:12,120 --> 00:05:14,759
We are headed straight for
a Scotch egg drought, Eddie.
116
00:05:14,760 --> 00:05:16,759
Now, I can go
to the big Sainsbury's.
117
00:05:16,760 --> 00:05:18,559
Will, this is Maureen.
118
00:05:18,560 --> 00:05:19,999
Maggie... Donovan.
119
00:05:20,000 --> 00:05:21,719
Enchante! This is Maggie.
120
00:05:21,720 --> 00:05:23,319
She's a funeral-crasher.
121
00:05:23,320 --> 00:05:24,919
This is my best friend, Will.
122
00:05:24,920 --> 00:05:27,199
Ew! Your best friend is a man?!
123
00:05:27,200 --> 00:05:29,799
Thank God I'm here.
THEY CHUCKLE
124
00:05:29,800 --> 00:05:31,239
You have to admit, though,
125
00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:32,679
it felt like we were destined
to meet.
126
00:05:32,680 --> 00:05:35,039
Why? Because you made me laugh
when I was sad?
127
00:05:35,040 --> 00:05:36,839
Whitney always said...
Oh, come on!
128
00:05:36,840 --> 00:05:38,879
She always said you use fun
as a tool to keep me captive.
129
00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:40,079
Well, that's insane.
130
00:05:40,080 --> 00:05:42,079
Her point was that
you deflect with jokes
131
00:05:42,080 --> 00:05:43,519
to avoid the real shit.
132
00:05:43,520 --> 00:05:45,440
I don't avoid the real shit,
Eddie, I can't.
133
00:05:46,640 --> 00:05:48,759
I've just learnt that
having a sense of humour
134
00:05:48,760 --> 00:05:50,960
about that kind of stuff is
sort of crucial for survival.
135
00:05:52,400 --> 00:05:54,480
Sitting in the misery won't make
the misery go away.
136
00:05:55,640 --> 00:05:58,439
I know I might not be your classic
version of a support system,
137
00:05:58,440 --> 00:05:59,759
but I do support you.
138
00:05:59,760 --> 00:06:01,679
Like when you first took over...
139
00:06:01,680 --> 00:06:02,959
Wet Mouth!
140
00:06:02,960 --> 00:06:05,119
Is that a new nickname? It's gross.
141
00:06:05,120 --> 00:06:07,519
It's what you should rename the pub.
142
00:06:07,520 --> 00:06:10,479
No-one wants to get fucked up
in the Red Lion.
143
00:06:10,480 --> 00:06:12,960
Lions are orange.
144
00:06:13,960 --> 00:06:15,319
I haven't decided yet.
145
00:06:15,320 --> 00:06:16,879
Like, I'd have to leave law school.
146
00:06:16,880 --> 00:06:18,399
Eddie, anyone can be a lawyer,
147
00:06:18,400 --> 00:06:19,919
but not everyone gets to run
a cool bar.
148
00:06:19,920 --> 00:06:21,759
It's not cool.
Yeah, but it could be.
149
00:06:21,760 --> 00:06:23,159
All we have to do is, like,
150
00:06:23,160 --> 00:06:24,839
get someone from Vice
to DJ once a month
151
00:06:24,840 --> 00:06:26,919
and make sure the bathrooms
are disgusting.
152
00:06:26,920 --> 00:06:28,439
What are you doing?
153
00:06:28,440 --> 00:06:29,720
Just come up here.
154
00:06:32,600 --> 00:06:34,240
Have you got any ciggies? Mm.
155
00:06:47,200 --> 00:06:48,360
Make a wish, bitch!
156
00:06:51,000 --> 00:06:53,839
It's like you're campaigning
to be the mayor of my life.
157
00:06:53,840 --> 00:06:55,319
None of this is relevant.
158
00:06:55,320 --> 00:06:56,959
And stop doing that!
159
00:06:56,960 --> 00:06:58,839
THUMP!
It's fucking pointless.
160
00:06:58,840 --> 00:07:01,599
Being your friend is
hard fucking work, Maggie.
161
00:07:01,600 --> 00:07:03,840
You're just ignoring
all the times you...
162
00:07:04,920 --> 00:07:07,279
Hey! Are you OK? You look hungover.
163
00:07:07,280 --> 00:07:09,879
I'm fine. But thank you for
saying I look like shit.
164
00:07:09,880 --> 00:07:11,959
CLAMOUR
165
00:07:11,960 --> 00:07:13,719
Oh, sorry...
Excuse me!
166
00:07:13,720 --> 00:07:15,719
I asked for two glasses,
you've only given me one.
167
00:07:15,720 --> 00:07:17,119
Can you charge my phone?
168
00:07:17,120 --> 00:07:19,399
I had zero living family
who could support me
169
00:07:19,400 --> 00:07:20,879
in any real way. I know.
170
00:07:20,880 --> 00:07:22,559
And then suddenly dropped
on my lap was
171
00:07:22,560 --> 00:07:23,679
this massive responsibility.
172
00:07:23,680 --> 00:07:25,239
The bar...? You.
173
00:07:25,240 --> 00:07:28,559
Robert Downey Jr - unconfirmed,
but I see it.
174
00:07:28,560 --> 00:07:30,719
Carrie Fisher - legend.
175
00:07:30,720 --> 00:07:32,839
Vincent van Gogh - no way!
176
00:07:32,840 --> 00:07:34,439
Do not cut off your ear.
177
00:07:34,440 --> 00:07:35,839
I will try.
178
00:07:35,840 --> 00:07:38,439
Mel Gibson - they can't all be good.
179
00:07:38,440 --> 00:07:40,039
Kurt Cobain...
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00:07:40,040 --> 00:07:42,239
I know you girls say having
a disgusting toilet
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00:07:42,240 --> 00:07:43,919
makes the bar cooler,
182
00:07:43,920 --> 00:07:45,959
but there's got to be limits
to that, don't we think?
183
00:07:45,960 --> 00:07:47,799
Can you just leave out the ones
who've killed themselves?
184
00:07:47,800 --> 00:07:49,480
Yeah. Uh...
185
00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:52,439
Hmm... Buh-buh-buh...
186
00:07:52,440 --> 00:07:53,879
Great.
187
00:07:53,880 --> 00:07:55,839
Sinead O'Connor. What about her?
188
00:07:55,840 --> 00:07:57,839
I'm finding cool celebrities
with bipolar disorder
189
00:07:57,840 --> 00:07:59,639
to cheer Maggie up. Mm.
190
00:07:59,640 --> 00:08:02,279
Well, the first thing to do
is find the best treatment,
191
00:08:02,280 --> 00:08:03,720
get you into a routine.
192
00:08:05,280 --> 00:08:07,679
I think moving in with me would do
you a world of good
193
00:08:07,680 --> 00:08:09,239
in that respect. No way.
194
00:08:09,240 --> 00:08:10,679
Just while you... No.
195
00:08:10,680 --> 00:08:12,360
But, darling, I don't want you
to be alone while you're...
196
00:08:14,440 --> 00:08:15,720
What if something...?
197
00:08:21,560 --> 00:08:23,959
I can stay with her for a bit.
198
00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:25,719
No, it's fine. No, no, no,
199
00:08:25,720 --> 00:08:27,919
it'll be a nice change from
upstairs.
200
00:08:27,920 --> 00:08:29,559
I've got so many rats now,
201
00:08:29,560 --> 00:08:31,519
I might need to build
some sort of home for them.
202
00:08:31,520 --> 00:08:32,640
Well...
203
00:08:36,800 --> 00:08:37,800
Is that cool?
204
00:08:39,000 --> 00:08:40,599
Yeah.
205
00:08:40,600 --> 00:08:42,119
Grand.
206
00:08:42,120 --> 00:08:43,480
That's settled.
207
00:08:46,720 --> 00:08:48,399
Do you have any jobs going?
208
00:08:48,400 --> 00:08:49,920
I can't do this any more.
209
00:08:52,320 --> 00:08:54,399
My God.
210
00:08:54,400 --> 00:08:56,840
The six months that Anya worked here
were the drunkest of my life.
211
00:08:58,160 --> 00:09:00,440
Yeah, I know. I lived with you
for most of them.
212
00:09:01,440 --> 00:09:02,520
Right.
213
00:09:04,720 --> 00:09:06,999
That must have been a lot for you,
I get it.
214
00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:09,079
You don't get it, Maggie,
how could you?
215
00:09:09,080 --> 00:09:10,999
I do. No, you don't!
216
00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:13,479
You have never had to be responsible
for anyone else
217
00:09:13,480 --> 00:09:15,239
in your whole life.
218
00:09:15,240 --> 00:09:17,080
Where are you...? Pissing!
219
00:09:23,480 --> 00:09:25,160
SHE SIGHS
220
00:09:35,240 --> 00:09:37,240
SHE SIGHS
221
00:09:41,880 --> 00:09:43,240
How's it looking in there?
222
00:09:44,440 --> 00:09:46,599
Something or someone has given birth
in the sink
223
00:09:46,600 --> 00:09:48,360
but other than that, about the same.
224
00:09:50,200 --> 00:09:52,159
Look, I know you think
this friendship has been
225
00:09:52,160 --> 00:09:54,160
about you looking after me,
and I get that, but...
226
00:09:55,640 --> 00:09:57,759
...I look after you, too.
No, you don't.
227
00:09:57,760 --> 00:10:00,199
I do, Eddie, just because
my care looks different to yours...
228
00:10:00,200 --> 00:10:02,479
Name one time you've looked
after me successfully.
229
00:10:02,480 --> 00:10:03,679
Other than today?
230
00:10:03,680 --> 00:10:05,240
Maggie... Fine.
231
00:10:08,080 --> 00:10:09,319
SHE SCOFFS
232
00:10:09,320 --> 00:10:11,080
Exactly!
Well, just give me a minute!
233
00:10:14,920 --> 00:10:17,239
OK... How about that time you...?
234
00:10:17,240 --> 00:10:18,560
They're honestly not that bad.
235
00:10:20,120 --> 00:10:22,159
OK. Go home. I'll run the bar.
236
00:10:22,160 --> 00:10:23,719
That's not what happened!
237
00:10:23,720 --> 00:10:25,440
They're honestly not that bad.
238
00:10:27,280 --> 00:10:29,319
OK. Go home. I'll run the bar.
239
00:10:29,320 --> 00:10:30,879
My point still stands.
240
00:10:30,880 --> 00:10:32,839
You're making it sound
like a bigger deal than it was,
241
00:10:32,840 --> 00:10:35,279
because you always change
the narrative to suit you.
242
00:10:35,280 --> 00:10:37,119
No, I don't.
You change so many details.
243
00:10:37,120 --> 00:10:38,200
Eddie...
244
00:10:40,120 --> 00:10:43,520
My memory is fucked from
years of being on lithium.
245
00:10:45,320 --> 00:10:46,759
I'm sorry. It's not intentional,
246
00:10:46,760 --> 00:10:48,839
it's not malicious, I just...
247
00:10:48,840 --> 00:10:51,039
I can't remember every detail
of every moment.
248
00:10:51,040 --> 00:10:53,479
And that makes me sad sometimes.
But, yeah,
249
00:10:53,480 --> 00:10:54,960
it can't be helped, like.
250
00:10:56,760 --> 00:10:58,040
It's not on purpose.
251
00:11:00,720 --> 00:11:02,120
I am sorry if it was too much.
252
00:11:03,800 --> 00:11:05,919
I'm sorry if I leant on you.
I honestly didn't know
253
00:11:05,920 --> 00:11:08,000
I was doing it. I just didn't
have the tools to...
254
00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:11,679
I didn't have any tools,
255
00:11:11,680 --> 00:11:13,919
It's like I was trying to fix
an engine
256
00:11:13,920 --> 00:11:15,560
with my bare hands and no YouTube.
257
00:11:17,280 --> 00:11:19,479
I'm sorry you had to be like the...
258
00:11:19,480 --> 00:11:21,360
The Farmer Hoggett to my Babe.
259
00:11:22,720 --> 00:11:25,440
PHONE VIBRATES
LOUD MUSIC
260
00:11:35,360 --> 00:11:36,960
CHUCKLING
261
00:11:38,800 --> 00:11:41,119
That's my second Regina
of the night.
262
00:11:41,120 --> 00:11:43,119
This party shags!
263
00:11:43,120 --> 00:11:45,400
PHONE VIBRATES
264
00:11:48,040 --> 00:11:50,960
Hey! Get off your phone
and start serving, will ya?!
265
00:11:52,680 --> 00:11:55,119
Sometimes I think it was more like
266
00:11:55,120 --> 00:11:57,320
the Babe leading the Babe.
267
00:12:30,240 --> 00:12:32,919
OK, maybe my shitty memory only
remembers the good things,
268
00:12:32,920 --> 00:12:33,920
but...
269
00:12:35,080 --> 00:12:36,839
...the night you won this,
270
00:12:36,840 --> 00:12:37,999
when we...
271
00:12:38,000 --> 00:12:41,799
MUSIC THUMPS
CHATTER
272
00:12:41,800 --> 00:12:44,239
He is definitely
the best shag I've ever had,
273
00:12:44,240 --> 00:12:45,839
including women,
274
00:12:45,840 --> 00:12:47,839
which is VERY unusual!
275
00:12:47,840 --> 00:12:49,159
Well, congratulations, Owen.
276
00:12:49,160 --> 00:12:50,799
It's all about the knuckles.
277
00:12:50,800 --> 00:12:53,199
The knuckles!
278
00:12:53,200 --> 00:12:54,679
Not the knuckles!
279
00:12:54,680 --> 00:12:57,239
It would be classic Anya
to like that, though.
280
00:12:57,240 --> 00:12:58,719
You made a cute speech.
281
00:12:58,720 --> 00:13:00,319
Did I? Can't remember.
282
00:13:00,320 --> 00:13:02,559
Oh, come on. No, I don't.
283
00:13:02,560 --> 00:13:05,079
I told you, I'm basically
Dory from Finding Nemo,
284
00:13:05,080 --> 00:13:06,680
if she also had a mood disorder.
285
00:13:08,080 --> 00:13:09,359
You said something like...
286
00:13:09,360 --> 00:13:11,799
GLASS CLINKS
Hear ye, hear ye.
287
00:13:11,800 --> 00:13:16,279
I have known Miss Theodora Rushton
for six years now,
288
00:13:16,280 --> 00:13:19,919
and in that time she has made
my life infinitely better.
289
00:13:19,920 --> 00:13:21,519
Oh, it's a serious one.
290
00:13:21,520 --> 00:13:22,839
On top of that,
291
00:13:22,840 --> 00:13:25,559
she has single-handedly
turned Wet Mouth
292
00:13:25,560 --> 00:13:28,799
into the three-time motherfucking...
293
00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:33,159
Hackney Online Bar Of The Year!
294
00:13:33,160 --> 00:13:35,719
ALL CHEER
295
00:13:35,720 --> 00:13:36,840
Eddie...
296
00:13:37,840 --> 00:13:39,999
...I have seen you deal
with every setback,
297
00:13:40,000 --> 00:13:42,159
every angry, drunk man,
298
00:13:42,160 --> 00:13:44,639
every pile of puke in the bathroom,
like it's nothing.
299
00:13:44,640 --> 00:13:48,759
But I know - we know -
it's not nothing.
300
00:13:48,760 --> 00:13:50,399
It's amazing.
301
00:13:50,400 --> 00:13:52,039
Eddie,
302
00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:55,479
you are the coolest,
303
00:13:55,480 --> 00:13:58,359
strongest, smartest person I know.
304
00:13:58,360 --> 00:14:00,639
And I really fucking love you.
No, I can't.
305
00:14:00,640 --> 00:14:02,599
No, you have to feel feelings.
No, I don't!
306
00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:04,359
Tickle her until she feels feelings.
307
00:14:04,360 --> 00:14:06,399
Must feel feelings!
308
00:14:06,400 --> 00:14:07,999
Feelings! Ah! Anya!
309
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:10,319
That was gorgeous, babe.
310
00:14:10,320 --> 00:14:11,520
Aw, thanks!
311
00:14:12,800 --> 00:14:15,079
Sorry, I don't want to be rude,
but who are you?
312
00:14:15,080 --> 00:14:16,639
I'm Ryan.
313
00:14:16,640 --> 00:14:18,879
I was sat at the table
next to you at the awards,
314
00:14:18,880 --> 00:14:20,400
and thought you guys seemed more
fun.
315
00:14:23,520 --> 00:14:26,559
Ryan in the ho-o-o-ouse!
316
00:14:26,560 --> 00:14:29,479
Ryan in the hizz-zzy!
317
00:14:29,480 --> 00:14:31,999
BOTH CHUCKLE
318
00:14:32,000 --> 00:14:34,119
I can't believe
that's how we met him,
319
00:14:34,120 --> 00:14:36,879
and now that bitch is literally
the executor of my will.
320
00:14:36,880 --> 00:14:39,479
I know, he could have been
a killer or a furry,
321
00:14:39,480 --> 00:14:40,560
for all we knew.
322
00:14:42,880 --> 00:14:44,759
That's not a great example,
by the way.
323
00:14:44,760 --> 00:14:45,879
What?
324
00:14:45,880 --> 00:14:46,919
Of you being an amazing friend.
325
00:14:46,920 --> 00:14:48,519
It doesn't really support
your argument.
326
00:14:48,520 --> 00:14:49,559
My argument?
327
00:14:49,560 --> 00:14:51,319
Yeah, cos that night ended
when you...
328
00:14:51,320 --> 00:14:53,199
Is she on any medication?
Do we know?
329
00:14:53,200 --> 00:14:54,959
SHE VOMITS
Hello?!
330
00:14:54,960 --> 00:14:57,319
Medication? Uh, y-yeah.
331
00:14:57,320 --> 00:14:58,760
We're not on drugs!
332
00:15:00,240 --> 00:15:01,919
I was on new meds.
333
00:15:01,920 --> 00:15:04,039
I wasn't supposed to drink
on them, but...
334
00:15:04,040 --> 00:15:06,879
But you did. And I don't get
to be angry about that
335
00:15:06,880 --> 00:15:08,959
because it's like,
"Oh, Maggie has bipolar.
336
00:15:08,960 --> 00:15:10,759
"She can't help it.
It's not her fault."
337
00:15:10,760 --> 00:15:12,479
So then I have to bury my feelings.
338
00:15:12,480 --> 00:15:13,599
I never asked you to bury...
339
00:15:13,600 --> 00:15:16,159
That night was supposed to be
about Dad,
340
00:15:16,160 --> 00:15:18,640
so he could see
that everything was OK.
341
00:15:20,200 --> 00:15:21,639
I didn't know that.
342
00:15:21,640 --> 00:15:23,160
Cos it's stupid.
343
00:15:24,440 --> 00:15:26,399
He can't see anything.
344
00:15:26,400 --> 00:15:27,560
He's dead.
345
00:15:30,640 --> 00:15:32,120
Your feelings aren't stupid, Eddie.
346
00:15:33,480 --> 00:15:35,120
It matters to me if I've hurt you.
347
00:15:36,720 --> 00:15:39,360
There's always a reason
you can't show up for me, Maggie.
348
00:15:40,840 --> 00:15:43,040
If you're referring
to what happened last year...
349
00:15:55,840 --> 00:15:58,040
If you're talking about
what happened last year...
350
00:16:00,160 --> 00:16:01,680
...I had lithium poisoning.
351
00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:05,319
I had too much lithium in my blood
352
00:16:05,320 --> 00:16:07,400
because my doctor prescribed
the wrong amount.
353
00:16:08,560 --> 00:16:09,840
And that's the truth.
354
00:16:11,120 --> 00:16:14,439
I was trying really hard
to get better when that happened.
355
00:16:14,440 --> 00:16:15,800
I still am.
356
00:16:17,080 --> 00:16:18,719
It's a lot of work, it's every day,
357
00:16:18,720 --> 00:16:20,360
but I am so much better now.
358
00:16:22,560 --> 00:16:23,959
You don't seem better.
359
00:16:23,960 --> 00:16:25,999
Sorry, Eddie,
but you don't know that.
360
00:16:26,000 --> 00:16:27,479
You haven't been here.
361
00:16:27,480 --> 00:16:29,039
And when you've been here,
you've been...
362
00:16:29,040 --> 00:16:30,680
Brainwashed by a con artist?
363
00:16:33,520 --> 00:16:34,520
Yeah.
364
00:16:36,880 --> 00:16:38,080
You must feel...
365
00:16:39,720 --> 00:16:41,920
I can't think of a better word
than insane...
366
00:16:45,720 --> 00:16:46,800
I know what that's like...
367
00:16:48,560 --> 00:16:50,720
...when your reality turns out
not to be real.
368
00:16:52,280 --> 00:16:53,560
It happened to me.
369
00:16:55,160 --> 00:16:58,239
It follows me every day.
I try and forget it and...
370
00:16:58,240 --> 00:16:59,359
...I can't.
371
00:16:59,360 --> 00:17:01,360
BANGING ON DOOR
372
00:17:04,760 --> 00:17:06,999
Call an ambulance, for God's sake!
373
00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:08,879
Didn't you know she was out there?!
374
00:17:08,880 --> 00:17:10,519
Oh, God, I...
375
00:17:10,520 --> 00:17:13,159
Come on, darling.
You'll be all right.
376
00:17:13,160 --> 00:17:14,599
You'll be all right, love.
377
00:17:14,600 --> 00:17:17,039
Gillian wasn't there.
378
00:17:17,040 --> 00:17:19,120
Yes, she was, I called her.
No, you didn't.
379
00:17:21,400 --> 00:17:22,400
Oh!
380
00:17:24,240 --> 00:17:26,200
Let's go over there. Here we go.
381
00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:30,319
OK. Take it easy.
SHE MOANS
382
00:17:30,320 --> 00:17:31,320
OK.
383
00:17:32,520 --> 00:17:34,079
Here you go.
384
00:17:34,080 --> 00:17:35,400
OK...
385
00:17:39,880 --> 00:17:41,640
Hi, Gillian. It's Will.
386
00:17:42,920 --> 00:17:45,519
Um, can you meet me
at Homerton Hospital?
387
00:17:45,520 --> 00:17:46,880
He's never said anything.
388
00:17:56,160 --> 00:17:57,320
How do you know that?
389
00:17:59,200 --> 00:18:00,720
How do you know what happened?
390
00:18:02,480 --> 00:18:05,919
He called me from the hospital
while I was at the airport.
391
00:18:05,920 --> 00:18:06,960
Oh.
392
00:18:08,960 --> 00:18:10,720
So, you knew before you even left.
393
00:18:12,480 --> 00:18:15,039
You knew I'd been poisoned,
and you didn't even drop me a DM.
394
00:18:15,040 --> 00:18:17,000
It's...
Is that how much you hate me?
395
00:18:18,440 --> 00:18:21,119
I missed your abortion
because I was poisoned.
396
00:18:21,120 --> 00:18:22,519
But you abandoned me
397
00:18:22,520 --> 00:18:24,319
because you wanted to go
on holiday.
398
00:18:24,320 --> 00:18:25,599
That's not it!
399
00:18:25,600 --> 00:18:26,959
It kind of seems like it is!
400
00:18:26,960 --> 00:18:28,399
I had to go, Maggie, I had to.
401
00:18:28,400 --> 00:18:29,639
Why?!
402
00:18:29,640 --> 00:18:31,999
So you could go and smoke weed
with Mind Control Barbie?
403
00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:33,919
No, because I was fucked!
404
00:18:33,920 --> 00:18:36,799
I was so fucked
and I'd just lost everything.
405
00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:38,639
And I didn't know how to cope
with that.
406
00:18:38,640 --> 00:18:41,159
And I couldn't stay here
and sit in the mess of it,
407
00:18:41,160 --> 00:18:42,600
because I'm fucking weak.
408
00:18:44,360 --> 00:18:46,639
I'm so weak that instead
of dealing with my shit,
409
00:18:46,640 --> 00:18:49,119
I found someone who told me
they could make it better
410
00:18:49,120 --> 00:18:50,479
and I let them tell me
what to think.
411
00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:52,600
I mean, what the fuck?!
412
00:18:54,280 --> 00:18:56,479
I know I'm not soft,
413
00:18:56,480 --> 00:18:59,039
and I know I don't seem like
someone to be gentle with,
414
00:18:59,040 --> 00:19:00,320
but I am.
415
00:19:01,960 --> 00:19:04,719
My sad looks very different
to your sad,
416
00:19:04,720 --> 00:19:06,279
but it's still very real.
417
00:19:06,280 --> 00:19:09,480
And it still fucking hurts.
418
00:19:12,920 --> 00:19:14,120
I'm a mess!
419
00:19:15,240 --> 00:19:17,440
And a fraud and a loser.
420
00:19:19,040 --> 00:19:21,799
You don't want me, Maggie,
I can't help you.
421
00:19:21,800 --> 00:19:23,119
SHE CRIES
422
00:19:23,120 --> 00:19:26,120
♪ Remember how it used to be
423
00:19:28,080 --> 00:19:31,359
♪ When the sun would fill
the sky... ♪
424
00:19:31,360 --> 00:19:34,359
So, thank you so much
for having me.
425
00:19:34,360 --> 00:19:36,119
Oh, you're more than welcome.
426
00:19:36,120 --> 00:19:39,319
Theodora,
can you fetch the microphone?
427
00:19:39,320 --> 00:19:41,640
I think now's the time
for my Amazing Grace.
428
00:19:42,880 --> 00:19:44,600
Oh, damn, I'm sad to miss that.
429
00:19:46,280 --> 00:19:48,679
You know,
I thought this was going to be
430
00:19:48,680 --> 00:19:50,200
the worst day of my life.
431
00:19:52,160 --> 00:19:53,400
And it wasn't.
432
00:19:54,880 --> 00:19:57,039
And I think that might be
because of you,
433
00:19:57,040 --> 00:19:59,079
you know, distracting me
434
00:19:59,080 --> 00:20:01,279
with how insanely inappropriate
you are.
435
00:20:01,280 --> 00:20:02,759
SHE CHUCKLES
436
00:20:02,760 --> 00:20:06,600
♪ All I wish is gone away... ♪
437
00:20:07,760 --> 00:20:09,479
Any time.
438
00:20:09,480 --> 00:20:13,040
♪ All I wish is gone away
439
00:20:14,600 --> 00:20:18,599
♪ All I wish is gone away... ♪
440
00:20:18,600 --> 00:20:21,480
SHE CRIES
I'm so sorry.
441
00:20:24,320 --> 00:20:25,680
Sorry, Maggie.
442
00:20:30,840 --> 00:20:32,840
SHE SOBS
443
00:20:40,040 --> 00:20:41,280
Mm-hm...
444
00:20:43,640 --> 00:20:45,480
Ugh. Whew.
445
00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:52,720
So, we're both Babe.
446
00:20:55,040 --> 00:20:57,160
Two pigs are better than one, anyway.
447
00:20:58,320 --> 00:20:59,440
Mm.
448
00:21:01,960 --> 00:21:03,360
Hey... Mm-hm?
449
00:21:06,320 --> 00:21:07,839
Get behind the bar.
450
00:21:07,840 --> 00:21:10,399
SHE SCOFFS
451
00:21:10,400 --> 00:21:12,519
I'm not really
in the mood to make cocktails.
452
00:21:12,520 --> 00:21:14,879
Oh, come on, just...
Just trust me. Come on.
453
00:21:14,880 --> 00:21:16,600
Oh... OK.
454
00:21:22,320 --> 00:21:24,759
SHE SNIFFLES
455
00:21:24,760 --> 00:21:27,599
DOOR OPENS
456
00:21:27,600 --> 00:21:29,600
DOOR CLOSES
457
00:21:37,960 --> 00:21:40,600
Hi! Uh, could I get a drink?
458
00:21:41,960 --> 00:21:44,399
I'm on the run from a screening
of The Hangover II,
459
00:21:44,400 --> 00:21:46,439
which I inexplicably attended
with the ex
460
00:21:46,440 --> 00:21:48,479
who told me to go on the Dukan Diet.
461
00:21:48,480 --> 00:21:51,840
Hey! This doesn't happen to be
your dad's wake, does it?
462
00:21:54,080 --> 00:21:55,320
Ah...
463
00:21:58,280 --> 00:21:59,839
It is, yeah,
464
00:21:59,840 --> 00:22:02,879
but, uh, please don't let that
stop you hanging out here
465
00:22:02,880 --> 00:22:04,280
for hours.
466
00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:10,239
So, what, we're just going
to start again?
467
00:22:10,240 --> 00:22:13,040
No. I mean, we can't.
468
00:22:14,640 --> 00:22:16,799
What's done is done, like.
469
00:22:16,800 --> 00:22:17,920
I'm a nightmare.
470
00:22:19,120 --> 00:22:20,719
You're a nightmare.
471
00:22:20,720 --> 00:22:22,200
There's no cure for that.
472
00:22:23,640 --> 00:22:24,880
But...
473
00:22:27,640 --> 00:22:29,600
We can decide
that we love each other.
474
00:22:31,600 --> 00:22:32,960
That we need each other.
475
00:22:34,240 --> 00:22:35,320
Move on...
476
00:22:36,760 --> 00:22:38,040
...together.
477
00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:42,080
Can I move in with you?
478
00:22:43,480 --> 00:22:44,600
Of course.
479
00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:47,440
And everything will be all right?
480
00:22:51,640 --> 00:22:53,360
You're all I have now, Maggie.
481
00:23:25,440 --> 00:23:29,519
♪ If I had words
482
00:23:29,520 --> 00:23:37,000
♪ To make a day for you
483
00:23:38,400 --> 00:23:43,199
♪ I'd sing you a morning... ♪
484
00:23:43,200 --> 00:23:44,439
I've got you.
485
00:23:44,440 --> 00:23:49,559
♪ ..golden and new
486
00:23:49,560 --> 00:23:57,560
♪ I would make this day
last for all time
487
00:24:02,320 --> 00:24:10,600
♪ Give you a night deep in moonshine
488
00:24:18,480 --> 00:24:27,600
♪ If I had words to make
the day for you... ♪
34286
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