Original subtitles

(SOFT CHORAL SINGING)

(CROW CAWS IN DISTANCE)

(COUGHING)

(WOOD CREAKS)

- (SIGHS)

Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.

- Forgive me, madam, for so have I.

- Who are you? - I have information.

- Pray tell. - Hold on to your seat, darling.

And if you're wearing a hat, I might suggest you hold on to that too.

- I'm ready.

- Yesterday's explosion was the doing of an Australian assassin. - Yes.

Is that it? - You knew that? - Yeah. I knew that.

- Well... - So that is it?

- Obviously not. - OK.

- There's a, um...

There's a man. - Yeah?

- No, that's actually all I've got. I was just...

- You were gonna just make something up. - Yeah.

- WHISPERS: Yeah. For God's sake.

(DOOR OPENS, SHUTS) - Lovely to meet you!

(DOOR OPENS, SHUTS)

- Forgive me, Father. I've done something really disgusting.

- I'm not a priest. I'm not a priest.

(DOOR OPENS, SHUTS)

(LOW, DARK MUSIC)

- Swaran!

(BEEP!)

(BOOM!)

(RUBBLE CLATTERS)

- Michael. (LOUD RINGING)

Michael! - Where am I? - You're in the hospital again.

- Oh man. I gotta stop getting into hospital.

- You've gotta stop getting in the hospital.

- My mission to hospital ratio is terrible.

- Well, it's 100% ― two hospitalisations, two missions.

- Swaran?

- Dead. - (SIGHS DEEPLY) - I'm sorry.

- Why'd they kill him? - We don't know, but, uh... I want you to take a break.

Go someplace and recuperate. - I'd like to bring Magnus to justice.

- Sue said he's left the athletes' village. - I put a tracker in his backpack.

- Only works for half a mile. He could be in Canberra by now, Michael.

It's time for you to take a break ― fly fishing, I don't know. I don't know what you young pe

- Actually...

I have always wanted to go to...

(STIRRING, REFLECTIVE MUSIC)

- # La, la, la, la, la, la, la,

# laaa, laaaa.

# La, la, la, la, la, la, laaaa, laaaa... #

(MUSIC FADES)

(WATCH BEEPS)

(BICYCLE TYRES SKID)

(WATCH BEEPS)

(BEEP!)

(BEEP!)

(SOFT, MYSTERIOUS MUSIC)

(WATCH CONTINUES BEEPING)

(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)

(PLANE ENGINE DRONES IN DISTANCE)

(MUSIC DARKENS)

(BEEPING QUICKENS)

(MUSIC INTENSIFIES)

(BEEPING GRADUALLY SLOWS)

- (COUGHS)

(INTRIGUING ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)

- Great day for it. - Great day for what? - Espionage... in the park.

- What have you got for me? - I expect you're wondering why I brought you down here.

- I assume it's because you've got some information― - I have some information.

- Yeah. Well, it better be good this time. - Mm-hm.

The head of the Australian Intelligence Service is a man named―

- Dennis Green. - Dennis Green. Yes.

And it may interest you to know that he's currently in New Zealand.

- We know that. - Mm-hm.

He is staying at the home of a millionaire...

by the name of Norman White― - We know that.

- ...down in Queenstown. - We know that. - Mm-hm.

He may have ordered the hit on the Indian foreign minister. - He did.

- Yeah. - You better keep talking. I swear to God...

(SCOFFS) Hello? - Hello.

- Oh my God. - Oh! Don't take that. That's unprofessional.

- I walked for 20 minutes, then I caught two buses,

then I walked for another 10 minutes to come here for you to, once again,

tell me something I very much already know.

- Can I have my paper back, please? - No.

- Can I have my paper back, please? - Why do you even need a newspaper? - I don't like people lo

- Why not? - HIGH-PITCHED: Cos I'm a spy!

- Don't yell 'I'm a spy' in the middle of a park!

- Well, don't take my newspaper. I was reading that.

- What were you reading?

- Current events. - Ugh.

Don't contact me again until you have something I don't already know.

- Oh, you ripped it! Man...

- Thank you. - Thank you.

- What did that guy just get? - That's the wine tasting board.

- Could I please get that but with apple juice?

- We only have one type of apple juice. - I don't mind.

- So, just to clarify, you want six glasses of apple juice. - On the piece of wood.

- And it's all the same type of apple juice. - Mm.

- OK.

- Can I ask you something? - Shoot.

- What was that plane spraying on the grapes?

- We don't have any planes.

- You don't use planes? - Never.

- I have two questions. One, where is the nearest airfield?

Two, can I get these last bad boys to go?

(INTENSE ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)

(MUSIC ENDS)

(WATCH BEEPS REPETITIVELY)

(MYSTERIOUS MUSIC)

(DOOR SLAMS IN DISTANCE, PLANE FLIES OVERHEAD)

(BEEPING STOPS)

(MAN EXHALES DEEPLY)

(BOTTLE ROLLS)

(FOREBODING MUSIC)

(GUN COCKS)

(MUSIC STOPS)

(LOW, MYSTERIOUS MUSIC)

(PLANE BUZZES OVERHEAD)

(INSECTS CHIRP)

(THUD!)

(CURIOUS ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)

(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)

(FLOORBOARDS CREAK)

(FLOORBOARDS CREAK)

(MUSIC INTENSIFIES, STOPS)

- Surprise.

- (SIGHS)

- You know, I had to convince the man in reception you were my husband.

- (LAUGHS)

That is so

funny and crazy.

What a funny idea that I'm your husband.

That's a cr― such a crazy concept. That's, like, really, really funny.

(STAMMERS) It's witty.

- Yeah. I mean... I don't think it's that funny.

- No, neither.

Neither. It's― It's just...

It's just funny.

(MOMENTOUS MUSIC)

- You taste like an apple.

- Thank you. You taste like a angel.

-Anangel. - Who is that?

- No,anangel. - Yeah. I don't know who that is.

- Come. I want to try something.

- OK.

- OK. So, I will be playing the role of an extremely wealthy woman.

And you will be playing the role of my young, lowly pool boy.

- OK. - OK. Go out and knock on the door.

(DOOR OPENS, SHUTS)

(KNOCK AT DOOR)

GROWLS: Who is it?

- It's the pool boy.

- GROWLS: Please do come in,

young man. (DOOR OPENS)

(DOOR SHUTS)

- Hello. - (COUGHS)

(CONTINUES COUGHING) - Are you OK? - No.

I am extremely

old and sick.

- I don't know about this. - What, you're not attracted to me because I'm old and sick?

- I really don't feel that good. -Youdon't feel good?

I'm on death's freakin' door.

(THWIP! THUD!)

- This is getting silly. - I know.

- I can't keep flying round the country doing hospital visits. - I'm sorry, sir.

- I spoke to the doctor. He seems to think you've swallowed quite a bit of glyphosate

- What is that, apple juice? - It's a very potent herbicide.

- From apple juice? - No.

Did you drink some apple juice? - Oh yeah.

- Well, it's not from apple juice. It's used to kill plants.

- Why would someone want to kill plants? They're so innocent.

- Did you consume any products that might have been used to kill plants?

- Not that I know of. - (SIGHS)

- Unless it was the white powder that Magnus' plane was dropping on all the grapevines.

- Well, yeah. It will definitely be that. - I don't know what that was,

but that burned my throat something crazy. It might've been that.

- Yeah. It was definitely that. - Eh. Possibly.

- Definitely. - Maybe.

- Definitely. It was definitely that.

- Thank you.

(LILTING PIANO MUSIC PLAYS)

- Right. Whatever information you're about to tell me,

I swear to God,

if it is something that I already know,

I'm gonna grab that painting off the wall and smack it down on your head so hard

that you'll get stuck in there like a damn Looney Tune. Is that clear? - Yep.

- Mm-hm. - Mm-hm. - Great.

What have you got for me?

(SIGHS)

- Norman White, the millionaire who's chummy with the Australian Intelligence Service.

- Mm-hm. - Well, his birthday...

is...

the 24th of October.

Did you know that? - (SIGHS) No.

- No, really? - Technically, I did not know that.

- Well, then. He's done it! Fantastic!

- With that said... - Mm. - Mm.

...in what world would we need to know that? - In this world.

That's his special day ― 24th of October. - It's useless information.

- You didn't say it had to be useful information.

You said it had to be information that we didn't already know. - (CHUCKLES)

- Mm-hm. - I guess I did.

- I'm absolutely buzzing. I'm absolutely buzzing. - (SIGHS)

- Is this a date? - What? - Hm?

This ― is this a date... - No. - ...with the art gallery?

- No. - No.

Could I tell people it was a date? - Absolutely not.

(CAR HORN HONKS)

(DOOR CREAKS)

(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)

- IRISH ACCENT: Top of the mornin'! - (GASPS) Aargh. Oh.

- Oh my gosh. Sorry. - That's OK. I didn't feel like it anyway.

- BOSS THROUGH INTERCOM: Send him through immediately. Don't let him flirt with you.

- I'm not flirting with her.

I'm not flirting with you. - Uh... he can't hear you unless I press the button.

- Oh. - Would ya like me to press it? - Yes, please.

Hello.

- What are you doing? Come in.

- OK.

- Uh― Wait. Before you go, I just wanted to say something.

The other day, you asked if I wanted to go to the movies with you,

and I said that I couldn't because I had a boyfriend.

Well, he actually broke up with me.

So... I'm now available to go to the movies with you.

- Oh. - You don't want to any more.

- Oh no. It's definitely not that.

It's just that there is this woman. - You have a girlfriend.

- She said I was like a apple. - It's OK.

- She's not, like... - You should probably go in.

- INTERCOM: Michael!

- I should― I should go in.

- (SIGHS)

- Firstly, congratulations to Anderson for winning the bronze medal.

- Thank you. - Yeah. He didn't actually help with the mission,

but we're all very proud of him. - Thank you.

- Now, down to business. The Australians are poisoning our grapes.

- What? - I know. First of all, they kill the Indian foreign minister,

and now they're killing our grapes. - Why?

- That's exactly what we need to find out.

I have my man Mark on the line. He works for the New Zealand Environmental Agency.

I'm gonna bring him up on the picture phone. (MACHINE BEEPS, RINGS)

Mark― (RINGING DISTORTS)

- What is this? - Picture phone.

- Sorry, what's supposed to happen? - Well, it's a picture phone. - Yep.

- It's like a phone with a picture. - A picture phone.

- OK. - A picture... - Yeah.

- A picture of what? - With a picture of the person you're talking to.

In this instance, it's Mark. (MACHINE BEEPS)

- I can't see anything. - No. - Oh, it has a camera on the top.

- Oh. So Mark has a picture phone. - Well, how is that relevant?

- Well, for us to get the picture, surely Mark would have to have a camera in his teleph

(CLICK! BEEPING STOPS) - That's a good point.

Mark. - PHONE: Oh, gidday. - Yeah.

Do you have a picture phone? - Yeah, nah. No picture phone. - Oh.

He doesn't have a picture phone. - BOTH MICHAELS: Ohhh.

- Mark, can you tell me what you just told me before when I asked you who was the main importer of

to New Zealand? - Yeah. That'd be Norman White.

- Norman White.

Thank you, Mark. That's all I need to know. (CLEARS THROAT) - (SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY)

- Well, I went to high school with him. Yeah.

Figure skating? Oh God, that's sad. Yeah. - (SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY)

- No, well, pass on my regards to...

to the― Yeah. No. OK.

Well, I've gotta― I've gotta go. I've got everyone here in a meeting. But, um... yeah. OK.

Are you gonna stop talking, Mark?

Yeah. Can you sh― Can you shut up?

Can you shut up, please? Mark, I've gotta go.

Do you mind shutting up, Mark?

- Just hang up.

- Thank you, Sue. That was a very good idea.

Now, where were we? Norman White of White's Agricultural Supplies fame.

Third-richest man in New Zealand. - We went to his house in Queenstown.

- Exactly. - He's a Scorpio.

My sources tell me. - He also has a warehouse in the Bay of Islands.

I want you to take a look... tonight.

(DRAWER OPENS)

- No one told me you were coming down here, so I haven't prepared much.

I did manage to, uh, whip these up.

(BANG!)

- Jeans. - Ladies and gentlemen,

you are looking at an incredibly durable pant.

Stylish,

versatile, comfortable.

Jeans ― they're timeless.

- Do they do anything? - I'll tell you what they won't do is get a rip.

And if they do, that's kind of cool now ― ripped jeans.

I could picture you in a― in the ripped jeans, just sort of a 'don't care' attitude.

Like, yeah ― not taking life too seriously. - So they're just regular jeans.

- I've been busy! I made his special watch.

How did it go, by the way? - It was good, thank you. - He loved it.

- I'm wearing jeans. Can I just point that out? Why would I need those jeans?

- I didn't know that. I didn't look at your legs.

I only look at a woman's head. - What about this?

- That's just a tranquilliser gun. - Well, we'll take that.

- What for? - To tranquillise, probably.

- It's only got one dart. - That, my friend...

is all we'll need.

- At 2200 hours, aka 10pm tonight... - Thank you.

- ...two of us will approach the warehouse from the water in a kayak.

Our getaway vehicle will be here.

A third person will approach around the back, on foot, through the woods.

Any volunteers? - I will.

- Really? - A nice walk through the woods actually sounds kinda good.

(GRUNTS) This is not a nice walk through the woods!

- I never said nice. - She never said nice.

- RADIO: Shut up, Michael. This isn't even the woods. This is thorny bush!

(INTREPID ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)

(PING!)

- The hell?

(GRUNTS)

- (GRUNTS) - (GROANS)

- (BREATHES HEAVILY)

(SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)

We're in. - I'm in too.

- I said 'we're'. - Sorry, I forgot. I'm we're.

- We're we're. - WHISPERS: That's right. - WHISPERS: Let's split up.

I'm going inside. - RADIO: Ow!

Don't do all the snooping without me.

(SOFT, TENSE MUSIC)

- The Abel Tasman National Park.

(INSECTS CHIRP)

(GENTLE STRING MUSIC)

- What brings a British spy to New Zealand?

- The World Unity Games.

But I'm leaving for London tomorrow. - Are you? - Yes.

- Why did you tell the New Zealanders?

- I told them I thought the bomb was probably you guys. - (CHUCKLES SHORTLY)

- I think they knew that. - I told them that Norman White's birthday was the 24th of October.

- That doesn't seem relevant at all. - Well, it's his special day, so that's a bit disresp

- What else? - Told them that you were staying with Norman White in Queenstown.

- Just that? - What do you mean just that? That's three good bits of info.

- It's nothing. - That is not nothing. That's good stuff, that is.

- You can go. Untie him.

- You're just gonna let me go, just like that? - You're harmless.

- Excu― I'm not harmless.

Excuse me. Harmful!

Full of bloody harm. - Go away.

- You know what? There is a world...

where I punch you and shoot you. - (LAUGHS)

- It's not funny.

Unbelievable.

(LOW, MYSTERIOUS MUSIC)

- (BREATHES DEEPLY)

The office is locked. - RADIO: I'm locked in a frickin'

prison of trees.

Ow!

- Zero, zero, zero, zero, enter. (BEEP-BEEP-BEEP!)

Far... (SIGHS)

- The 24th of October.

- Two, four, one, zero, enter.

You son of a gun. You did it.

- We've got company.

(LOW, SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC)

(ALARM BLARES, BELL JANGLES)

(SERENE MUSIC)

(KNOCKING AT DOOR)

- Sir, sorry to interrupt.

Please don't shoot the messenger, but there's been a break-in at Norman White's warehous

in Russell.

- Don't tell me what to do.

(GRAND ORCHESTRAL MUSIC)

Captions by Chloe Farmer. Edited by Sam Baker.

Captions were made with the support of NZ On Air.

www.able.co.nz Copyright Able 2026