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1
00:00:01,784 --> 00:00:02,959
Meanwhile on Con Man
2
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Die human!
3
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Jerry
4
00:00:05,962 --> 00:00:07,877
-Hey buddy!
-I have an audition.
5
00:00:07,920 --> 00:00:10,706
for Clint Eastwood.
Maybe put in a good word for me?
6
00:00:10,749 --> 00:00:13,143
All famous people don't know all
the other famous people, Wray.
7
00:00:13,187 --> 00:00:14,492
But yeah I know him.
8
00:00:14,536 --> 00:00:16,364
He borrowed my lawn mower.
He owes me a favor.
9
00:00:16,407 --> 00:00:19,671
Are you guys ever going to
make a Spectrum movie?
10
00:00:19,715 --> 00:00:22,022
-God, I hope not.
-You don't like sci-fi?
11
00:00:22,065 --> 00:00:23,719
I hate sci-fi.
12
00:00:27,201 --> 00:00:31,509
They are retarding art.
13
00:00:31,553 --> 00:00:33,468
Retardin' it all up.
14
00:00:50,137 --> 00:00:52,139
Oow, Man.
15
00:00:54,837 --> 00:00:58,667
Seriously.
16
00:00:58,710 --> 00:01:02,410
aah, aah
17
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What? What?
18
00:01:33,093 --> 00:01:36,922
Come on.
19
00:01:36,966 --> 00:01:40,839
Come on.
20
00:01:49,892 --> 00:01:51,676
haa,
21
00:01:55,985 --> 00:02:00,990
-Is one of those coffees for me?
-Yes
22
00:02:01,033 --> 00:02:02,731
Come in.
23
00:02:02,774 --> 00:02:07,823
Did I record my audition
last night? I got an email
24
00:02:07,866 --> 00:02:11,174
from the casting director.
Thank you, great choices,
25
00:02:11,218 --> 00:02:13,176
I'll definitely
send this on to Clint.
26
00:02:13,220 --> 00:02:15,004
I don't know, I went to bed.
27
00:02:15,047 --> 00:02:17,398
My memory stops
at the Platinum party.
28
00:02:17,441 --> 00:02:19,400
What the hell happened last night?
29
00:02:19,443 --> 00:02:23,143
-I got laid.
-Oh my God.
30
00:02:23,186 --> 00:02:26,189
-Oh no! Oh no.
-Do you want a towel?
31
00:02:26,233 --> 00:02:28,583
No, you leave your towel on.
32
00:02:29,323 --> 00:02:31,281
Did I…? Did we…?
33
00:02:31,325 --> 00:02:34,458
-Did I…
-I did.
34
00:02:34,502 --> 00:02:36,808
That is disgusting!
35
00:02:37,896 --> 00:02:43,293
Thank God that's disgusting.
Thank God, that is disgusting.
36
00:02:43,337 --> 00:02:45,861
Did we record
my audition last night?
37
00:02:46,992 --> 00:02:48,342
Yeah, yeah
38
00:02:48,385 --> 00:02:51,823
I think we did that.
Please, tell me it was good.
39
00:02:52,520 --> 00:02:54,783
I don't remember
40
00:02:55,305 --> 00:02:58,308
Oh my God it works. Holy shit.
41
00:02:58,352 --> 00:03:00,310
After you passed out,
42
00:03:00,354 --> 00:03:03,966
Burnsie and I recorded
some other things.
43
00:03:04,009 --> 00:03:08,275
That's benefits of a
strong core right there.
44
00:03:08,318 --> 00:03:13,497
Prepare for your probe, human.
45
00:03:13,541 --> 00:03:20,765
OK, well, I have a panel.
Burnsie, that was magical.
46
00:03:20,809 --> 00:03:23,681
Don't get clingy.
47
00:03:23,725 --> 00:03:27,337
Yeah, I got, I got it
48
00:03:27,946 --> 00:03:30,079
Oh, your panel is right
after his, so…
49
00:03:30,122 --> 00:03:33,952
-Yeah.
-Why don't I meet you back stage
in about an hour, ok.
50
00:03:33,996 --> 00:03:36,999
Oh, you can keep my underwear.
51
00:03:37,042 --> 00:03:39,610
Oh no…
52
00:03:44,659 --> 00:03:46,182
No, no, no.
53
00:03:46,226 --> 00:03:49,229
Andy Serkis and I are very, very
different Perf-cap actors
54
00:03:49,272 --> 00:03:51,709
you see, in the Watchman
55
00:03:51,753 --> 00:03:56,366
for instance, I performed
as Dr. Manhattan's penis.
56
00:03:56,410 --> 00:03:57,889
Without me, it was just a
57
00:03:57,933 --> 00:04:01,676
dangling blue distraction,
right? But I,
58
00:04:01,719 --> 00:04:06,028
breathed life into that penis.
I gave it mood, expression,
59
00:04:06,071 --> 00:04:09,684
foreskin.
60
00:04:09,727 --> 00:04:11,642
Jack
61
00:04:11,686 --> 00:04:15,298
Hey, buddy, could you give me a
call, whenever you get
this message,
62
00:04:15,342 --> 00:04:18,780
it's about that Clint Eastwood
thing, uh, also, um…
63
00:04:18,823 --> 00:04:25,177
Jerry fucked Bobbie,
oh my God, call me.
64
00:04:26,091 --> 00:04:31,967
…which is right nipple, would
harden, and he drank so
profusely, that, that nipple,
65
00:04:32,010 --> 00:04:35,623
you could hang a wet leather
jacket on it. It was all-
66
00:04:40,236 --> 00:04:41,629
How do you feel?
67
00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:48,026
How do y…
68
00:04:50,377 --> 00:04:52,683
I feel shitty.
69
00:04:52,727 --> 00:04:55,164
That Eastwood audition…
70
00:04:55,207 --> 00:05:00,125
-it matters.
-OK well, the fans matter.
71
00:05:00,169 --> 00:05:04,347
And they love you. But it's a
perfect cure for a hangover.
72
00:05:06,654 --> 00:05:10,310
I'm 43. I mean I know I don't
look it but uh,
73
00:05:10,353 --> 00:05:16,664
every missed chance feels
like a last chance.
74
00:05:18,753 --> 00:05:21,190
You know what doesn't matter
is sci-fi acting.
75
00:05:21,233 --> 00:05:24,933
Sci-fi acting doesn't matter.
You're never going to win
an award for it.
76
00:05:24,976 --> 00:05:27,196
No, I guess no matter
how good you are.
77
00:05:27,239 --> 00:05:32,201
Even Spectrum lasted half a season.
78
00:05:33,071 --> 00:05:35,465
It doesn't have worth.
79
00:05:36,771 --> 00:05:41,036
Who likes Jesus? I have a theory
that he wasn't crucified.
80
00:05:41,079 --> 00:05:44,344
-I think Vikings killed
Jesus Christ.
-Thank you,
81
00:05:44,387 --> 00:05:45,910
thank you very much,
ladies and gentlemen,
82
00:05:45,954 --> 00:05:48,652
Mr. Jerry Lansing.
83
00:05:48,696 --> 00:05:52,221
The best MoCap man you'll never
see in the movies.
84
00:05:52,264 --> 00:05:56,051
--And next we have
for you, your favorite and mine,
85
00:05:56,094 --> 00:05:57,400
Good crowd.
86
00:05:57,444 --> 00:06:00,360
--Spectrum's own, Wray Nerely!
87
00:06:05,582 --> 00:06:07,105
Thank you.
88
00:06:07,149 --> 00:06:11,153
Sounds like some of you are
as hangover as me.
89
00:06:12,589 --> 00:06:15,766
A little bit more, come on.
90
00:06:15,810 --> 00:06:20,815
Come on, I need this…hahah.
91
00:06:27,299 --> 00:06:34,524
Thank you. That's actually, uh,
very rejuvenating.
92
00:06:34,568 --> 00:06:35,830
Who would have
thought ten years later
93
00:06:35,873 --> 00:06:37,701
we'd still be talking
about Spectrum? Not me.
94
00:06:39,486 --> 00:06:42,489
Um, uh, but right now, I'm
really glad that we are.
95
00:06:42,532 --> 00:06:44,273
That was really nice thank you,
96
00:06:44,316 --> 00:06:46,144
that was worth something to me.
Thank you.
97
00:06:46,188 --> 00:06:49,931
I actually feel better.
OK, so I'm gonna play
a clip here that
98
00:06:49,974 --> 00:06:52,847
you've seen a thousand times,
and then I'll comment on it
99
00:06:52,890 --> 00:06:54,849
which you've heard
a thousand times.
100
00:06:54,892 --> 00:06:57,547
Whoa! There's a lot of questions!
101
00:06:57,591 --> 00:06:58,809
All right, pause that.
102
00:06:58,853 --> 00:07:00,942
I think maybe we can…
103
00:07:00,985 --> 00:07:05,947
OK thanks, I guess we'll go to
questions first.
104
00:07:06,774 --> 00:07:10,778
Why did you say you hate sci-fi?
105
00:07:10,821 --> 00:07:18,263
I, I said that. I mean I said that?
106
00:07:18,307 --> 00:07:22,398
Well who loves sci-fi?
Here, you do, I saw,
107
00:07:22,442 --> 00:07:27,316
and you, and you, you, ok,
and you do. Ok yes.
108
00:07:27,359 --> 00:07:31,363
OK, next question, next
question, next question.
109
00:07:31,407 --> 00:07:34,366
When are you shooting
the Clint Eastwood movie?
110
00:07:34,410 --> 00:07:38,936
Hush your mouth, hush it down,
hush it down. Shhh, shhh.
111
00:07:40,068 --> 00:07:43,854
I didn't even know that Clint
Eastwood was making a western.
112
00:07:43,898 --> 00:07:45,900
For the record, if it's a western.
113
00:07:45,943 --> 00:07:48,468
You wouldn't shut up about
it at the party.
114
00:07:49,338 --> 00:07:53,821
I don't even know, I don't even
know
115
00:07:53,864 --> 00:07:56,737
If you had to choose
between a Clint Eastwood movie
116
00:07:56,780 --> 00:08:01,219
and the Spectrum movie,
which would you choose?
117
00:08:01,263 --> 00:08:06,398
Why don't you move on from her.
She's got lots of qu…
Some other…
118
00:08:06,442 --> 00:08:10,141
Thank you for that. I really
want to be honest here.
119
00:08:10,185 --> 00:08:13,057
So I'm gonna be, I'm gonna be
honest with you guys.
120
00:08:16,278 --> 00:08:21,196
Spectrum.
121
00:08:22,850 --> 00:08:28,203
Spectrum.
122
00:08:28,246 --> 00:08:31,946
Spectruuuum.
123
00:08:32,294 --> 00:08:34,557
This is a little much, you're
retarding me.
124
00:08:34,601 --> 00:08:36,211
What?
125
00:08:36,254 --> 00:08:41,912
You're retard-
retard, I mean, yeah
126
00:08:41,956 --> 00:08:44,393
you're retarding.
127
00:08:44,436 --> 00:08:48,832
Ya'll heard it. Retarding. I'm,
I'm the one who's retarded.
128
00:08:48,876 --> 00:08:51,835
-My ego's retarded.
-Watch your mouth!
129
00:08:51,879 --> 00:08:54,490
-You're all retarding.
-You leave Miranda alone.
130
00:08:54,534 --> 00:08:58,494
Wow. OK, I'm not, I'm not not
leaving her alone,
I'm just saying,
131
00:08:58,538 --> 00:09:05,283
look - to retard, the actual
definition is to limit. OK?
132
00:09:05,327 --> 00:09:12,464
To mangle. Not the second,
not, that's not it.
133
00:09:12,508 --> 00:09:13,988
I give to charities. I give to-
134
00:09:14,031 --> 00:09:18,209
Just this morning, I gave
something to help
135
00:09:18,253 --> 00:09:22,126
Spastic Seasonal
136
00:09:22,170 --> 00:09:24,302
-That's not a thing.
-Shit.
137
00:09:24,346 --> 00:09:27,262
You're an asshole,
you better watch it dude.
138
00:09:27,305 --> 00:09:28,742
This son of a bitch,
139
00:09:28,785 --> 00:09:32,093
stole my lucky pen, and he
refuses to give it back.
140
00:09:32,136 --> 00:09:34,051
You are a thief, Nerely!
You are a thief.
141
00:09:34,095 --> 00:09:35,923
You're an asshole.
142
00:09:35,966 --> 00:09:39,100
I didn't know I took your pen
accidentally.
Stole, that's a pretty
143
00:09:39,143 --> 00:09:44,932
harsh word, right. Easy
mistake, here, take your pen.
144
00:09:44,975 --> 00:09:47,587
My eye
145
00:09:51,373 --> 00:09:55,943
-Jerry and Bobbie had sex?
-Yes, isn't that disgusting?
Thank God.
146
00:09:56,726 --> 00:09:59,555
-What's going on?
-Oh, poker till the sun
came up and then
147
00:09:59,599 --> 00:10:02,950
somehow, it turned into
a Quinceaçera.
148
00:10:02,993 --> 00:10:09,347
I like your life so
much better than mine.
149
00:10:09,391 --> 00:10:12,220
I let him win. When he
bluffs he touches his nose.
150
00:10:12,263 --> 00:10:16,572
Listen, I need you to focus up
for me buddy. Focus up.
151
00:10:16,616 --> 00:10:21,882
Go with this. Hello, Everybody,
Ladies and Gentlemen, your
favorite captain.
152
00:10:21,925 --> 00:10:25,276
Mr. Jack, Moore.
153
00:10:25,320 --> 00:10:28,889
How you doing?
154
00:10:31,108 --> 00:10:32,632
I see you!
155
00:10:32,675 --> 00:10:34,111
-Hey Nerely!
-Oh no.
156
00:10:34,155 --> 00:10:35,635
We wanna talk to you!
157
00:10:39,595 --> 00:10:41,641
Come on, we're going.
We are going.
158
00:10:41,684 --> 00:10:43,555
Bobbie get my phone, get my phone.
159
00:10:43,599 --> 00:10:48,256
-You can run but you can't hide!
-Ruuuunn.
160
00:10:48,299 --> 00:10:51,259
Hey, Hey, I can walk.
161
00:10:51,302 --> 00:10:53,304
Yeah, my shoes just
make my feet hurt.
162
00:10:53,348 --> 00:10:57,657
-You son of a bitch.
-I am also angry at you.
-OK
163
00:10:57,700 --> 00:11:02,531
OK, the green room is the, I
don't know, I think we're lost.
164
00:11:02,966 --> 00:11:05,099
-We're going to lose him.
-She can walk.
-I'm handy capable.
165
00:11:05,142 --> 00:11:09,886
-Come on! Move it!
-Hey shove over, stickboy.
166
00:11:09,930 --> 00:11:12,628
Hey guys!
He's over there, hey!
167
00:11:12,672 --> 00:11:14,804
Hold my bag.
I've been practicing my
168
00:11:14,848 --> 00:11:18,112
impression of you.
I've got this.
169
00:11:18,895 --> 00:11:22,899
Retarding retarding, I hate
science fiction fans,
170
00:11:22,943 --> 00:11:24,553
I don't appreciate what I've got,
171
00:11:24,596 --> 00:11:28,035
Trophies and Awards are the only
sense of self-worth that I have,
172
00:11:28,078 --> 00:11:31,342
I, I aaw, I don't see what
I have because my
173
00:11:31,386 --> 00:11:37,305
head is stuck so far at my
own ass. Ooh, aah
174
00:11:37,348 --> 00:11:38,828
I have a drinking problem.
175
00:11:38,872 --> 00:11:40,787
-That's him.
-What?
176
00:11:40,830 --> 00:11:43,790
I love you.
177
00:11:43,833 --> 00:11:47,141
How is that me?
178
00:11:48,490 --> 00:11:52,320
Oooooooh
179
00:12:02,896 --> 00:12:05,942
Hey man, off stage already, huh?
180
00:12:05,986 --> 00:12:08,205
Sorry to hear about the
Clint Eastwood movie man.
181
00:12:08,249 --> 00:12:10,251
Thank you.
182
00:12:10,294 --> 00:12:13,776
Wait… sorr… wh- what?
183
00:12:13,820 --> 00:12:16,605
Oh the fans posted a video of
you talking about it last night.
184
00:12:16,648 --> 00:12:19,521
Apparently Deadline got Clint
coming out out of a restaurant.
185
00:12:19,564 --> 00:12:22,393
-Said you're a dickehead.
-Hush it down!
186
00:12:23,438 --> 00:12:28,791
A fan's love
Love that retards, am I right?
187
00:12:34,623 --> 00:12:39,193
Hey Sean, do you like
Bourbon balls?
188
00:12:39,236 --> 00:12:45,503
Yeah, right on.
189
00:12:47,592 --> 00:12:51,031
Nerely I'll see you in hell.
190
00:12:51,074 --> 00:12:54,425
Excuse me, are you
Sean Aston the actor?
191
00:12:54,469 --> 00:12:55,862
Not at the moment.
192
00:12:55,905 --> 00:13:00,344
-I am such a huge fan.
-That's sweet, thank you.
14532
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