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I miss Amy.
Everything about her.
Her smile.
Her eyes.
The way she'd look at me.
The way she'd kiss me.
The way she'd always run up to me after I got home from work, catching me in the
driveway with one of her kamikaze hugs, wrapping her arms and legs around me and
smothering me with kisses like she hadn't seen me in years.
The way she'd hold me after we made love.
I even miss the things that used to annoy me.
The shit that used to drive me so fucking crazy I could barely stand the
of her.
Her snoring, her backseat driving.
How she'd put the toilet seat up after she peed, like she was doing it just to
fuck with me.
How she'd chew with her mouth open, talking about some trivial nonsense
I'd give anything for a pair of earmuffs and a large hammer just to shut her up.
I'd give anything to be annoyed by her again.
She lives right down the street now.
But it's been two years since we've even seen each other.
I wonder if Amy ever thinks about me.
Like, if she's thinking of me right now.
Doubtful. She's with Sarah now.
And Sarah's great.
She's everything Amy could want and more.
I'm sure they're madly in love.
I'm sure Sarah doesn't care if Amy snores. And when she leaves the seat up,
Sarah probably gives Amy a fucking parade.
Not like me.
Always harping on her.
I drove her crazy.
I drove her away.
God, I miss her.
I miss her so much.
I miss... What are you doing?
Nothing. Just working on a story.
No, no, no. It's not done yet.
Why do I get the feeling you're hiding something?
I don't know.
I'm not.
Do you love me?
What's that supposed to mean?
If you have to ask, then never mind.
Rachel?
Rachel?
I
don't love
Rachel. I want to. I try to.
I wish I could.
But I just can't. She's too needy.
Living with her is like living in prison.
If I don't tell her I love her every ten seconds, she thinks I'm having an
affair. The irony is that the more suspicious she is of me cheating on her,
more it makes me want to.
I think about Amy all the time.
I want to call her up. Just go to her house.
I know where she lives.
It's our old house.
3364 Northview.
The little greenhouse right down the street.
I could go there right now if I had the courage.
just go there and knock on the door and tell amy i still love her make love to
her like in the old days
Aren't you going to go get that?
Let him wait.
You just fucked.
I want to bask in the afterglow.
Yeah, but it could be so many important. You should go check.
It's a rush.
It's probably just the mailman.
You know, sometimes it seems like you can't wait to get away from me.
What? Like when?
Like right now. After we fuck?
about cooties or something.
Well, I just, somebody's at the door. I just thought you should go answer it.
Well, whatever Amy wants, Amy gets.
What is that supposed to mean?
It means that you always put yourself first at the expense of everybody else,
namely me.
You know what? Fine, Amy. Make me the apple.
Hi, I'm Rachel.
You probably don't know me. I've never met him. Carol's girlfriend.
Hi, I'm Sarah.
I know.
Everything about her, her smile, her eyes,
the way she'd look at me, the way she'd kiss me,
the way she'd always run up to me after I got home from work, her snoring,
her backseat driving.
She lives right down the street, but it's been two years since we've seen
other. I wonder if Amy still thinks about me.
I'm sure Mimi does feel the same way about Carol.
Like, if she's thinking of me right now, it's doubtful she's with Sarah now.
And, like, I'm in shock. I don't even, like, I don't.
I've always, I've always thought that they have something going on. I just can
never prove it.
I'm not afraid to, but I want to.
I try to. I wish I could, but I just can't.
She's too needy.
Living with her is like living in prison.
The more suspicious he is of my cheating on her, the more it makes me want to.
I think about Amy all the time.
I just want to call her up.
I know where she lives.
Our old house.
33 64 Northview When I go
there knock on the door and tell Amy I still love her
Careful.
I thought you might want this one back.
How did you get this?
Your girlfriend brought it over for my girlfriend to read.
Oh, my God.
But I guess I should say your ex -girlfriend brought it over for my ex
-girlfriend now.
What happened?
I'll tell you about it later. I just, I really, I need to know if you really
feel that way.
All that stuff you wrote about missing me, is that true?
Yeah.
And you should remind her that it's pretty much the same thing.
Every second of every hour of every day.
What about Sarah?
I'm pretty sure Rachel has that covered now. She'll be fine.
Okay.
Thank you.
Thank you.
It's 13 right now.
Oh, that's perfect.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, yeah.
Oh, okay.
Don't worry.
I promise.
I miss Carol.
How do I look?
You look beautiful as always.
You're sweet.
Riley's lucky to find a girl like you.
Instead, I have to go on all these stupid dates.
Just date after date, and these girls are never who they say they are.
You know last week I went on a date where this girl just kept on showing me
pictures of her exes.
Like, who does that? It's so weird.
You're so lucky. I wish I had what you have.
No, you don't want my life.
Yeah, I do.
I mean, you have an awesome job, super hot girlfriend.
You have it made.
I wish I could find the one like you did with Riley.
What's up?
What's wrong?
I just... If I tell you, you can't tell anyone, especially
not Riley.
Yeah, of course. What is it?
You can tell me.
Come on, you can tell me. It's okay.
I don't think I'm in love with Riley anymore.
In fact, I don't ever really think I was.
I'm calling off the wedding.
Why? What happened?
I thought you guys were so happy.
Look, I don't want to talk about it.
Not to you, not now.
Come on, you can tell me anything. We've been best friends forever.
It's just...
Come
on, you can tell me.
Tell me anything.
Come on.
Look, you really want to know?
The reason...
The reason I'm leaving Riley, the reason I don't want to be with her is
because... Because I... Come on, tell me.
Because I... Because... Because she cheated on me.
A few weeks ago, I came home early.
Didn't think anyone was home.
Walked around really quick and yelled out, honey, I'm
home.
No answer.
Walked in further than I heard them.
Hmm.
What did she say?
Did she even see you?
No.
I basically just snuck out the front door, came back a couple hours later,
pretended like nothing happened. Just completely... I feel like I'm
playing myself.
No, don't even. This is not your fault.
I just want to beat her ass right now.
No, don't.
I mean, it's not worth it anyway, you know?
I mean, she was
already, she already had, her and I just, for the last month
now, it's been a lot.
So, I mean, it's for the best, you know?
I mean, now I have a good reason to call off the wedding.
Yeah, and you know.
someone who actually treat you the way that you deserve?
Someone who won't cheat on you?
Only anywhere to look.
You'll find her. I know you will.
Do you?
You okay?
I... No.
There's something I... There's something I've been needing to tell you for a
long time now.
What is it?
That's your date. You need to go.
You need to... You have plans.
I can't do this to you. I should leave.
Date me. I mean, I'm here for you. You're my best friend. I'll just tell
sick or something.
No. I mean, come on. What if she's the one?
She's not the one. She's just some girl I met on the internet.
Come on. You're my best friend.
We have a lot to talk about before you drop the bomb on Riley.
Look.
Just please go.
Just please.
I... Look, I lied.
I... I lied about Riley cheating on me. That's not the real reason I'm leaving
her. I'm not wanting to have this whole... Why would you lie about that?
It's because... Because... I can't tell you, okay? I just
can't tell you right now.
You need to go.
There's someone out there waiting for you.
Well, how about this? You wait here, and then, like, I'll be a couple of hours
or so, and then when I get back from my date, we can talk more about this.
Okay. Is that okay?
All right.
You'll be fine.
I love you.
I love you too.
And that is why I cannot and I will not
marry Riley.
I love you so much, Jamie.
That is why I will not or could not marry Riley or anyone else.
Because for me, it's only you.
And you will never know this.
Because I will never tell you.
Because if I did, you would never speak to me again.
And that is a weight heavier than my heart could ever hope to bear.
I would rather suffer in silence, watching you fall in love without me.
then tell you the truth and lose you forever.
Never telling you that I love you is the only way for me to keep you in my
life. As painful as it is for me to have you there, knowing we can never be
together, knowing I will never have you.
When you ask me what's wrong, I keep my lips tied shut and my eyes turned away.
That is why I lie.
I love you too.
I imagine how wonderful it would be to hear that.
To hear you say those words to me.
Even just once.
Even just once to tell me what I so want to hear.
If only this could be our truth.
I would live a lifetime of lies so happily.
Because I love you too.
And I would cry.
I would be so happy.
And you would wipe the tears from my eyes and say, Don't cry.
I'll always be here. And I'll never leave.
And we'll always be happy. And you'll never be sad.
And then the usefulness of words would fail us.
Because there wouldn't be any point to talking at all.
because our bodies would speak to each other and say everything
our lips could never say.
Oh. Oh, yeah.
with you and not not to have to say anything not have to summon courage or
away fears but just to live happy in love and truth forever in my
life will i
Hey, honey, it's Riley.
I'm just waiting for you to come home, and I hope everything's okay.
I just want you to know I love you.
I love you so much.
I don't know what I'd do without you.
Well, it's getting cold out.
I hope that doesn't mean that you're getting cold feet.
I'm just kidding.
Well...
I'll leave the lights on for you, and I love you.
See you soon. Bye -bye.
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