All language subtitles for Wife.Swap.The.Real.Housewives.Edition.S01E04_[English] (SUBRIP)

Are you guys gonna be okay
without me?

No!

I'm about to step into

someone else's life.

I can't believe I get to be
a Real Housewife.

I'm having breakfast
made for me.

Sounds like a vacation.

Oh, my God.

We don't really have
bedtimes.

Am I in the
Twilight Zone?

"You must be awake
no later than 5:30 AM!"

You're kinda lazy?

I have preserved
this carpet for years.

Paint!

- Only for Alethea...
- Oh, my gosh!

That one's gonna
leave a mark.

...to ruin it.

Everyone revolves
around you.

Let's go. Without a schedule,
all things fail.

Karter.

If you don't have a schedule,
what are you doin' in life?

Kruz, come on.
We're gonna be late.

- I'm Wendy Osefo.
- And I'm Eddie Osefo.

We have three kids.

Kruz, pass the ball!

Karter, Kruz...

Uh, but you still suck.

And Kamrynn.

In my Nigerian culture,

education is the main
focal point.

I want my kids, above all,
to be happy.

So, what are you guys
gonna learn today at school?

I wanna learn
science and math.

Happy with
multiple degrees.

I don't like
my mom's rules,

but, like,
we have to obey them.

Let's do a little
healthy snack.

- Okay.
- No.

I don't like healthy snack.
Boo.

I don't do chips.
I don't do sugary drinks.

Is that one of my kids?
What are you eatin'?

You see,
that's what I'm sayin'.

I wake up first
at, like, 5:00.

The kids are dressed by 7:00.

They eat breakfast
and are ready by 7:15.

Dinner between 5:30 and 6:00.

Seven o'clock is bathtime.

Eight forty-five
is prayer.

- Mm-hmm.
- Nine o'clock is bedtime.

Lights out!

Wendy's rules for me are
follow Wendy's rules.

I'm pretty much
her supporting staff.

My love of structure
comes from having no structure.

I was a latchkey kid.

My mom worked
all the time.

I wanted to make sure
that when I had kids,

I was more present
in their life.

- You gonna miss us?
- Of course.

I feel like someone
is coming to take my place,

and that's never happened.

I think it needs to be
a-a balance.

If I were to give you advice,

I would say balance
your scheduling.

There was no question
that said,

"What advice
would you give me?"

Okay.

Worst case scenario,
I swap lives with someone

who has no rules, whatsoever.

Yeah, count me out.

Ahh!

Hello.

I'd like for you
to meet Breck.

Ferrets are just
amazing pets.

The only bad thing is,
they're a little stinky.

I'm Alethea.
I'm a stay-at-home mom.

My husband, Craig,
we are college sweethearts.

We have four children.

My oldest is Hailey.

Then, I have Dylan,

Shane,

and Skyler.

I have created the life
of my dreams

where I've surrounded myself
by everything I love

and all my hobbies.

We embrace a philosophy
of low demand parenting.

Low demand parenting
basically means

empowering your children
to be independent.

So, that looks like
packing your own lunches.

I don't know
what you want.

You know what you want.

You-you have two hands.
You can do it.

I hate helicopter parenting,

hovering over your kid,
like, enh-enh-enh.

I don't like to be
a dictator to my children.

Okay, good luck.
Cook me a delicious meal.

They go to bed late.
They play basketball inside.

We don't really have
a bedtime, but we don't,

like, stay up around, like,
1 AM, or 12, or 11.

On a school night.

A few years ago,
we lived in New York.

We lived such
an overscheduled life.

Everything had to be
perfect.

They were booked out playdates
eight weeks in advance.

It was so suffocating.

And, ultimately,
that lead to burnout.

Bro, stop.

When we moved to Florida,
I found another way to parent.

It's way more stress-free.

You don't have to be
scheduled,

and I wanna share it
with another family.

Like, our mom just, like,
does her own thing.

Like, it's usually,
like, crocheting,

playing with the animals.

I wish my mom would cook
dinner more often.

And also,
a mom that's not lazy.

I think a real housewife
needs to learn

about the real world,
how real Americans live.

Gotcha!

So, we're doing
addition stories.

I know. I know. I know.
I'm practicing.

Okay.

- Found out?
- Yes.

Karter, Kruz,
pause the match!

So, you know
I'm going to a new family.

I have no idea
where they're sending me.

We're gonna find out
together.

- Stop, stop glazing.
- One, two, three.

Ahh!
- Oh!

You're going to
Naples, Florida.

Naples, Florida?

You know,
Florida has crocodiles.

Crocodile-- oh!

- Florida has crocodiles.
- It's the swamp people!

I'm gonna pray for you.

Welcome to
Potomac, Maryland!

All right.
That one took me by surprise.

Google the cast.

- You know to spell it?
- No.

Are you guys gonna
be okay without me?

- No!
- I don't know.

I'll be back very soon.

No.

Good luck.

- Bye, mommy.
- Bye, mom.

Ciao.

Bye! Whoo!

Naples is known for
its beaches, but is it, like,

Naples, or is it, like,
the Everglades?

I'm very nervous about,
like, the fancy factor

because that's what
housewives are.

They're fancy,
and I'm literally wearing

sweatpants
and a sweatshirt.

So, we shall see.

Looks nice.
Here we go.

Honey, I'm home!

Where's the furniture?

Okay, there's a game zone.

I feel like I'm in
a makeshift Dave and Buster's.

What's going on here?

So pretty!

Oh, I love it,
a nice, brick Colonial house.

Dorothy's not in Kansas anymore.

She's in Maryland.

Okay.

Hi. Oh, you look like
a Pomeranian.

Hi, baby.

This is Wendy's family.

So, it looks like
boy, boy, girl, amazing.

Doesn't look, like,
ball friendly in here.

It looks like a lot of things
need to stay in position

and not be broken.

Continue on the tour.
Lead the way.

Oh, four kids-- so cute.

Can I go in?

Can I open this?

Ahh, sh--!
What is that?

Ahh! What is that?

Oh, another one.

Oh, sh--. Oh, sh--.
What's in there?

I don't even wanna see.
What is it?

What in the Dr. Doolittle
is this place?

Ahh!

Are there animals
in here?

Oh, this is my room.

Relax.

I don't know
if I'm gonna relax,

not with them cats
running around.

What's this?
"Dear new"--

Chile-- the rules--

Okay, she didn't wanna use
a computer. Okay.

"Welcome to
Casa de Osefo.

I want to welcome you,
but also..."

Uh-oh, the but.

"Dear New Mom,
my animals are a big part

of our family,
so please treat them

like your fur babies."
Jesus, oh.

"In this house,
we don't sweat the small--"

Who are you?

I like dogs. Come here.
What's your name?

I-I'm the new mom.

"There is a clear schedule
in this house,

and the schedule
must be adhered to.

That means, you,
my dear friend, must be awake

no later than 5:30 a.m."

"In this house, we
don't have a lot of rules,

and routines are hard for us
to stick to--

bedtimes, chores,
and homework."

Oh, they don't have
a schedule. Hmm...

"Karter and Kamrynn need
to be ready for school by 7:15.

House is vacuumed
and organized by 10:00.

Begin dinner prep by 1:00--

dinner served
no later than 6:00.

Bathtime begins at 7:00.

Nighttime prayer
is by 8:45.

Everyone in bed by 9:00."
Yikes.

"We moved to Florida
from New York four years ago."

Okay, "To embrace
a no stress lifestyle.

Good luck."

There's no schedule,
no rules.

There's nothing here.
What am I reading?

Her rules, it was almost
like down to, like,

five-minute intervals,
and that is, like,

the life I left.
I did that in New York.

So, that's gonna be
interesting.

What is this?

Oh, I love it.

- Hi.
- Hi.

- I'm Craig.
- Okay.

This is my
laundry room office.

- Oh, okay, hi.
- So nice to meet you.

I'm Wendy.
So good to meet you.

So nice to meet you,
as well.

- Are you working?
- Yeah,

for a little bit.
- What do you do?

I do some trading and
some financial consulting.

We decided to put my office
in the laundry room.

Um, so, I have
the dual purpose of doing

my full-time job
and doing the laundry.

He's in the laundry room,

like, in a little--
a little nook, a corner.

Washer and dryer
has more space than he does.

Uh, it-it does work.
It-it works for me, though.

What does mom do
around this time?

She's in her room
crocheting

or playing with
the animals.

I think you met some
of the cats outside.

- How many cats is there?
- There's five.

And two ferrets
and a chinchilla,

and then-then we have
some ducks outside.

Love it.

I wasn't expecting someone
kinda dressed to the nines,

high heels.

That's a bit formal
for-for our style.

Come inside.

Hello.
- Hi.

- Hi.
- I'm new mom.

- You're new mom.
- I'm Alethea.

Can I give you a hug?

What's your name?

- Karter.
- Nice to meet you.

How old are you?
- Twelve.

Oh, nice.
I have a 12-year-old son, too.

- Oh, okay.
- What's your name?

- Kamrynn.
- Nice to meet you.

Can I give you a hug?

- What's up?
- What's up?
- Hi.

Boys are home.

- Hi.
- Hey.

How are you guys doin'?

- Good.
- Good.

Oh, you guys are
so cute.

- Thank you.
- I'm Wendy.

What's your name?
- Hi-- Shane.

- And what's your name?
- Skyler.

Hi, Skyler.

- Hi.
- Hi, Dylan.

Nice to meet you.

You drove yourself home?

Yeah, I just came home
from school.

Oh, that is so cool.

I didn't really know
what I was expecting--

high heels, makeup,
hair, everything.

I'm learning how to feed
the animals. Eww.

I was just kinda
taken aback.

Okay.

5:30 a.m.,
is that real?

Your mom really
wakes at that time?

- Mm-hmm.
- Yeah.

Yeah, oh, yeah.

What time do you
normally wake up?

Like, I don't set
my alarm.

So, is that, like,
uh, 6:00-ish?

No.

So, morning routine

is my department.
- Uh-huh.

I get to sleep in?

What time does mom
usually wake up, you think?

Like, 12:00.

- She sleeps in and--
- Every day?

Yeah.

First thing I got,
as a parent, I just--

I filled my yard
with kid toys, and ATVs,

and all that fun stuff.

Is that, like, chaos?

- It is.
- Ahh.

We do something called
low demand parenting.

So, you allow them to do
whatever they wanna do.

I kind of do,
actually, yeah.

How do you guys
feel about that?

Ahh, you--
Of course, you will like it.

She's definitely
way less strict

than our mom is.

Her kids have ATVs
and a lot of pets.

Yeah, she's cool.

What else can I do
to be like your mom today?

She likes to cuddle
with the animals.

Hmm, okay.

And-and her clothes
are a little more, like,

casual and, like, comfortable.

Mm-hmm.

Here we go.

For the record, maxi dresses
are super comfortable.

For the next 24 hours,

I have to live by
Alethea's rules.

So, for now, I just crochet
and play with animals?

Okay.

I'm comfortable.

I'm ready-- I even changed
my shoes for you.

A little fluffy action.
- Good-good enough.

I mean, cooking in a suit
is definitely a choice,

so I guess suit it is.

I'm nervous,
'cause I don't like to cook.

So, I have to make
a good first impression.

Grandmothers are pressure.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Hello.

- This is my son, Kruz.
- Hi.

- Hi. Nice to meet you.
- Hi.

- Can I give you a hug?
- This is Alethea.

- Yeah.
- Thank you. Aww, hi.

- This is Grandma Sue.
- Can I give you a hug?

- Uh, yeah.
- Hi. Nice to meet you.

Muah.
- Muah.

I would describe Wendy's mom
as very loving,

but she's not gonna shy away
from telling you her opinion.

Do we pray now or wait?

I'm praying.

I'm supposed to pray.
They are my children.

I'm gonna leave you guys
to do what you do.

- Okay.
- Mm-hmm.

And then,
I'll see you later.

I'm gonna make okra soup.

So...
- I've never really eaten okra.

So, what's a typical dinner
you cook for your family?

Uh, I didn't
inherit that trait.

Is there anything that
you want me to get started?

Ahh, all right.
Am I doing it right?

No, you-you-
you're doing it too big.

One, two, three, slice.

Even my five-year-old
granddaughter knows

how to cook okra
more than Alethea does.

You have to get it together.

You have to treat it
with respect.

Do you need help
cooking with your kids?

My mom comes over
and teaches my daughters

how to cook-- and my sons.

- And you just stay in bed?
- Yeah.

What kind of person are you?

Uh...

Maybe she's trying
to test me, to break me,

but I will not be broken.

Uh, it makes me very happy...
- Oh, my goodness.

...that she's passing on
the skills.

I can't get you.
And you are the bystander.

- Yes.
- God, help me.

We don't have
structured bedtimes.

No bedtime?

Jesus... ugh...

Do you need help
cooking with your kids?

God, help me.

I don't feel like you need
to cook to be a good mother.

The best reflection
of my parenting style

is that I always
get glowing reviews

about my children.

They all do really well
in school,

even without me
enforcing homework.

- You're against homework.
- I am.

- Oh, my Lord!
- Yep.

And you're taking credit for
your kids coming out right.

- Yes.
- The way you--

You know what?

They have no choice
but to work hard.

So, you're kinda lazy?

Come outside!
Wendy, come! Hailey's home!

- Hi, how are you?
- Nice to meet you.

I'm Hailey.
- Nice to meet you.

Hi, Hailey.

Hi, Shaney.

Come here.
- Aww.

I like having Hailey home
because, like,

she's like a second mom.

She'll take care of us.

She'll tell us what
to do and what not to do,

and she'll just
overall guide us.

- Welcome home.
- Oh, my God. Oh, thank you.

I hope you're enjoying
the farm.

Oh, we are loving the farm.

- Hey, boys. How ya doin'?
- All good, man.

- How was school?
- It was good-- 10-4.

Hi, Simon.

So, when you guys eat dinner,
where do you eat?

- Oh, right here.
- Here?

I mean, it's not-not always--
sometimes on the couch.

Okay.

But we broke out
the fine China.

I see.

Yeah.

And you guys do phones
at dinner?

- Yeah.
- It-it works for us.

I have a question.
So, you walk the dog.

- I walk the dog.
- And you do the laundry.

I do laundry, yeah.

You take all the kids
to their sports?

I do take the boys
to their sports.

But mom comes
to your games.

And she doesn't
even watch them.

- That's not true.
- You said she doesn't
watch your games?

It's true.
I think she's on her phone.

Aww.

Alethea doesn't really alter
her desires for her family.

Does she welcome you
at the door with, like,

a hug and say--
- No, she's not--

she's mostly on the couch
most of the time.

At the very least, you can
give your children a hug.

Hugs are free.

I'm here to fill her shoes.

So, whatever she does,
I'll do.

- Perfect.
- Go, team, go.

All right, guys.
We have to stick to schedule.

We are behind.

So, let's clean up,
and we gotta--

Now, I'm gonna pretend
I'm, like, really strict.

This is why I don't like
to cook-- too much work.

But she didn't do any work.

Okay, well,
it's getting dark.

- Yeah.
- Yeah.

It's getting very dark.

Yawning...

We-we don't really have
structured bedtimes.

- Okay.
- We typically, uh,

do go our separate ways.
- Okay.

And they figure out
when they wanna go to bed.

No bedtime?!

Am I in the Twilight Zone?

All right,
good night, team.

- Good night.
- Good night. See you tomorrow.

- Good night.
- Good night.

Ready for prayers.

Father, Son,
and the Holy Spirit.

Amen.

Sorry.

Okay. Forgive us whichever
sins against you today.

Everything's
so calculated

down to the, like,
the minute.

See ya in the mornin'.
- See ya in the mornin'.

8:25, 8:30, 8:35.

Sweet dreams.

All right, bye.

Seven hours
until I wake up.

Gotta be up at 5:30,
on the dot.

God, I'm gonna die.

Jesus... ugh...

Too early.

I'm to organize the bags
and wake up the kids.

Rise and shine.

I'm so used to being up
at 5 a.m.

and gettin' on
with the day.

There was
no breakfast to make,

no one to wake up.

The kids make
their own lunches.

Okay.

Nothing.
Absolutely nothing.

Just wake up.

All right, guys!

We're runnin' late!

Hi.
- Are we ready?

Ready.

- To take 'em to school.
- Yeah, let's go.

As Wendy, I think Alethea
is doing her best,

but if she's trying
to fill a size nine shoe,

she's about a four and a half,
right now.

- Okay.
- You're coming with, right?

- Yeah, sure.
- Okay.

Okay, does, uh,
she usually wear pajamas?

No, she doesn't.

You having fun?
- Fun, yeah.

It's a lot of work.
- Oh, oh, it is.

It is, the morning.
- It's crazy.

And we're running late
this morning, too.

Yep.

- Hi.
- Good morning.

I'm just doing some homework.

- Could I sit?
- Come sit, yeah.

Okay, I'm so not used
to being idle,

and I don't know what to do.

I mean, we could
go downstairs, and we could,

um, go do the animal
morning routine.

Ahh!

I'll hold him back,
and you're gonna get the poo.

And here,
you're gonna be great.

Okay, all right.

And this goes in here?
- And, yeah, put it-- yeah.

And you did it.
That was it.

The kids said that
mom's job was to do that.

It's-it's, like,
five minutes worth of work.

Oh, Breck, Bobo,
why y'all movin'?

My rules cannot
come soon enough.

Somebody call Delta
and get my flight.

Get my flight.

Oh, my gosh.

- Dad.
- Oh!

Kruz, what are you doing?

Time to vacuum.

Vacuuming with heels,

definitely a first.

Wendy is really particular
about vacuuming,

and vacuuming
in straight lines,

and leaving lines

in order to know
where you vacuumed.

And it-it doesn't look like
she's really focused

on what she's vacuuming, either.

It's a lot of
different directions

that she's goin' in.

Oh!

Being a Real Housewife
is a lot more work

than I expected.

Wendy's rules just
have no room for error

and no room to relax.

I cannot wait to change
the rules of the house.

Dog break-- hi.

- Welcome home from school.
- The boys are home.

Hey, Skyler,
how are you?

- Hello.
- Hey.

Aww, you got Hailey, too.
- Did you have a good day?

Just by her
embracing her brothers,

it's clear that Hailey
is the mom of this house.

These kids, and now Hailey,
needs a hands on mom.

I'm ready for it
to be my rules.

All right, guys,
we're done with the rules.

So, we're gonna
throw them away.

It's time to make
the big switch.

This is my rules now.

Welcome to Wendy's world!

Now, it's my rules.

The first order
of business,

structure.

Family dinner at 7 p.m.,
no devices.

No!

Okay, how about, like,
should we add

some more, like, fun?

- Yes.
- Yeah.

Some more kids stuff
into it?

The kids have
no rules now,

and it's gonna be okay.

- Woosah.
- It's fine.

Just keeping
an eye on the kids,

who now have no rules, uh,
is gonna require more work.

Bye. See ya soon.

I don't know if
I'm necessarily looking
forward to that.

I want us to all
come together.

And I'm going to spend
one-on-one time

with each of you kids,
doing what you like to do.

- Sounds great.
- Let's do it.

Okay, let's do it.

I hope the kids get out
of my new rules that,

with everything I do,
the children know

that they are
the center.

Let's crochet
in the office.

And they matter to me.

We're kinda just, like,
creating, like, a baseline

of, like, links.
- Oh, sh--.

You're doing
really good.

So, do you do this
with your mom often or...

Yeah, she taught me.

It was, like, really fun.

You know, baby Skyler
was talking about football.

Like, he was talking
about how your mom

really doesn't
go to his games.

Maybe she's, like,
a little, like, aloof

and in her own world.
- Mm-hmm.

In the sense that's, like,
maybe she's on her phone,

but, like, when I was
growing up, like,

she was, like, a PTA mom.
- Mm-hmm.

Me and Dylan
were in theater...

- Yeah.
- ...and she was, like,

making the costumes.

So, the mom you grew up with
is not the mom

that Skyler that Shane
grew up with.

Like, she was very type A
in New York.

And, like, since moving to
Florida, kind of, like,

laid back a little bit,

that it's kind of like
two different people.

I'm glad that my mom honestly
is not as stressed out

as she used to be
in New York.

But sometimes, I would wish
that my mom could be

a little more present
for my brothers,

kind of like how
I had it when I--

me and my sister
were growing up.

It's so interesting
because when you came home,

I saw the way
you embraced Shane.

There was a sense of
motherness to him with you.

Yeah.

So, do you ever feel like you
and your mom switched roles,

like, she's the child,
and you're, like, the mom?

I kind of, like,
parent the kids

how I wanna parent
my kids when I'm older,

like, with more structure
and with more regimen.

Like, I don't know if that
makes me sound, like, crazy.

No, it doesn't
make you sound crazy.

Or like a military person,
but, like--

No, I completely get it.

Hailey has
to be a mom

because her mom isn't
stepping up to the plate.

She's only 19.

At this point, I don't know.
- You don't even know.

- I don't know.
- I was like--

I was like, does she know
what she's doing?

I don't know
what this is.

Who is ready?

We're gonna have fun,
creativity time,

and get a little messy.

- A little messy?
- Yep.

This is crochet.

- Oh, I know what that is.
- I know how to knit.

So, have you ever
crocheted before?

Uh, in my class,
in art, I have.

Really? That's so cool.

Paint.
- I knew it.

When I was trying
to heal from burnout,

I started to craft.

This is about
to be messy.

The Osefo kids lead
such a structured life.

I figure crafting
was such a great way

to just blow off
some steam

and have some
unstructured fun time.

- Water soluble?
- We'll find out.

- We'll find out.
- Yeah.

Try to make each
of your loop the same size.

- Oh, my gosh!
- Dad.

What? Oh, that wasn't me.

Dad, this is your fault,
not my fault.

Oh, my gosh.
Kruz.

That one's gonna
leave a mark.

Kruz,
what are you doing?

I'm not taking the fall
for this one.

- Oh, my gosh!
- Dad.

Oh, that wasn't me.

Kruz, I--

That one's
gonna leave a mark.

Kruz, what are you doing?

It wasn't my fault, dad.

How is it
not your fault?

Mom's not gonna
like it at all.

No.

I don't know
what happened.

I know exactly
how it happened.

Kruz spilled the paint
under Alethea's watch.

Dad is secretly
dying inside.

- Secretly?
- Look.

- Ooh, that's amazing.
- Amazing.

Alethea taught me
how to crochet.

She is fun.

I'm gonna show mama
my crochet work.

Wow!

I wanna teach mom
how to crochet.

No.

Get it, Shane!

Every child
wants to be seen.

So, I wanna do what
makes them happy.

Shane likes the beach.
We're goin' to the beach.

Yay!

Oh!

Dylan likes the piano.
Call me Mozart.

- Yeah, okay.
- I got it?

- That's really good, though!
- Aah!

Skyler likes football.

I know that's right.

I'm his number one
cheerleader.

Let's go, Skyler!

There you go!
- Yes!

Touchdown!

That's my baby!

What about, like,
this right here?

Yes.

So, you-you guys
are about to do that?

Hey.
- Look how--

look how happy
they are.

- He almost got it.
- Oh, my gosh.

Thank you so much.

Dinner is served.
- That's a lot.

This is an example
of a typical night

for the Shapiros.

Ordering in
means no dishes.

And that means
more fun time.

All right, family,
let's do dinner.

Yes.
Come on, guys.

Okay,
so, first things first.

Cell phones.

Cell phone, cell phone.

I want all hands on deck
in the kitchen.

Gram's got
the garlic bread.

Who wants to do
the salmon?

Dylan and I
could help with that.

Awesome, okay.

Close.

High five.
- Wendy!

- Yes?
- I'm bored.

Ahh!

Come here, my child.

Come here, Shane.

Talk to me.
What's going on?

No.

That's right in
the thick of dinner.

My mom would let me.

- Different rules.
- Grandma said no.

- No.
- Dang.
- So, it's no.

Don't worry.
You'll enjoy this.

This, right here,
is an example

of the lack of
the structure in this house.

Bro, get off the table.
What are you doing?

It does not take
four degrees to understand

that these kids
need some rules.

Let's do this.
Salmon...

- Let's eat.
- Let's eat.

- That's good.
- Broccolini.

This is
a home cooked meal.

Mmm. Yummy.

- The salmon is good.
- The salmon is very good.

Good job.

If Shane likes something,
he likes it.

When was the last time
everyone sat at a table

like this?

Um, probably not since
New York.

Really?

I have really
enjoyed you guys.

I have learned
from you so much.

Did we meet
your expectations?

- You exceeded them.
- Aww.

I felt like
you're my own.

Like, I feel like
you're my own now.

I wanna make sure
you guys are okay.

You really listen,
and I really appreciate that.

Like, you hear me.
We see each other.

- Aww, that's very nice.
- That's my girl.

I'm so glad you're here.
We're having such a great time.

Aww, thank you.

There's no spaghetti, grandpa.
It's gone.

- It's over.
- We ate it all?

We ate it all.

That's how good it was.

- Very good.
- Very good. We ate it all!

What time is it, guys?

- I don't have my phone.
- Is it, like--

is this usually your bedtime?
- We'd probably be praying.

I was just gonna say,
you'd be doing your prayers.

But guess what.
No bedtime.

Right.
Isn't this more fun, Eddie?

What do you think?
- Uh, I'm tired.

You're excused.

All right, boys,
9:30, bedtime.

Good night.
- Good night. You, too.

Be good.

See ya in the a.m.
for breakfast.

Rules change
went really well.

Okay, here we go.

Okay.
Here we go.

Low stress, high energy,
high fun.

I need to get
my beauty rest.

I need to rest.
You see these bags?

Oh, my gosh.

Wendy, please come home.

Hey! So what?

Go to sleep!

- Hi.
- Nice to meet you.

How are you?
- I'm great. How are you?

- Don't look at the carpet.
- Huh?

- Oh.
- Kruz did it!

- What?
- Kruz did it.

- It wasn't me.
- Kruz did it.

Welcome home!

Off we go.

Alethea is taking us
to see alpacas.

And I didn't take
my allergy medicine.

So, that will be
interesting.

- Jeez...
- Yeah, that was
not smart of me.

Sounds like a disaster
waiting to happen.

Exactly.

I love finding
spontaneous, fun,

new adventures
for my family.

There's so many other ways
to enrich your life

other than school.

Hi, guys.

- Hi.
- Hi.

- Welcome to Black Barn.
- Thanks for having us.

Little Devonte was born
12 days ago.

The alpaca's name
is Devonte?

Yeah.

I wanna feed
that one.

Look, it's fine.
You're a pro.

I like feeding
the alpacas.

Why are you chasing
after me?

Am I your favorite lover?

I'm excited for my mom
to come here

and feed the alpacas,
but she might be scared.

Hey, look at this guy.
He has, like, boogers.

Ooh.

Hey, stop.
Calm down. Calm down.

Oh, my God, they're
bustin' down on my hand.

- Is this part of our bonding?
- Yeah.

Okay, Shane.

Why does it just, like--
eww, nah.

He's just chilling.
He's tired.

Okay, let's bond.
I will hold your friends.

Okay.
Ehh, it's slinking.

I will always remember Shane
for making me hold a ferret,

and the only reason I held it,
was for him.

This is fun.
Thanks, Alethea.

- Yeah, do you like it?
- Yeah.

When we get back home,
are you leaving?

Tomorrow,
your mom is coming home,

and then I leave.

Aww, are you guys
gonna miss Alethea?

- Mm-hmm. It was a fun time.
- Yeah.

You guys never let us
have fun.

- We never let you have fun?
- No.

- Dude.
- Ha-ha.

Once my mom comes home,
the rules are gonna change back,

and then it's gonna be
boring, again.

Do you think there is
any of Alethea's rules

you guys will be instituting
moving forward?

I learned a few things from
the, uh, Alethea rule book.

You know, coming out and
seeing nature and the animals,

and spending time with the kids
in outdoors,

and just watching them smile,
I think that is something

I definitely would love to
implement in our household.

Yes!

- The old alpaca loves me.
- Right.

You ready for
some breakfast?

- Mm-hmm.
- Yum, yum, yum.

All right.
What do we have?

- Good morning.
- Good morning, Craig.

How are you?
- Good.

Today is my last day
with the Shapiro family.

Bobo, get the hell
off the counter.

It's been a real treat
to see the way that

they're all excited
when I start cooking.

I could get used to this.

I hope that,
from this experience,

Craig and the kids
understand that

it's actually an act of love
to have a schedule

and to prioritize your family.

- Can I have more egg?
- More eggs?

More eggs, good.
Are the eggs good?

- Mm-hmm.
- Oh, good.

Thank you, guys,
for welcoming me into your home.

We do appreciate everything
that, uh, you brought to us.

We had a great time with you.
- Aww.

And, I'd like to manifest
that we change for the better.

- And change for the better.
- Yeah.

It's important that we remember
that t-the moments are fleeting,

and there's not gonna be
that many of them forever.

So, putting some of that
together time

back into the routine,
I think will go a long way

to just creating
even stronger bonds

than the kids already have.

All right, guys,
it was so good seeing you.

I definitely appreciate how
Wendy took the time to, like,

learn about me
and my siblings.

Wendy definitely went
the extra mile to, like,

be invested in our lives.

She kind of, like, embodied,
like, a second mom.

all: Bye!

Just know,
this is the last time

you're gonna be playing
in the kitchen.

Oh, my God!

- Hi.
- Oh, look who it is!

Mama! Mama!

Wow! Aww.
Welcome back.

- Hi, mom.
- Oh.

Hi.

- Hi.
- Hi. Nice to meet you.

How are you doing?

Wendy, this is Alethea.
Alethea, this is Wendy.

- It's so nice to meet you.
- Hi, Alethea.

- Hi.
- How are you?

I'm great.
How are you?

- Don't look at the carpet.
- Huh?

- Oh.
- Kruz did it!

Kruz did it!
- It wasn't me!

Kruz did it!
Kruz did it.

- What?
- It wasn't me.

- Kruz did it.
- Welcome home!

Welcome home!
Kamrynn!

Kruz did it!
Kruz did it!

I have preserved
this carpet for years--

spit up, diaper blowups--

only for Alethea to ruin it.

It wasn't even my fault.

- Zen needs to go for a walk.
- Okay.

You gonna take the kids?
- 'Cause Zen--

Yeah, I'm gonna take
the kids with us.

- Let's have a seat.
- Okay.

So, I can have a better view
of the spot you left

on my carpet.
- Oh, God, I'm nervous.

Would really love to know
your honest opinion.

Do you really wake up
at 5:30 a.m.?

- Yeah, I wake up at 5:00.
- Wow.

I mean, I wish
I was a morning person.

Like, it's such an amazing
thing to be--

- I'm not, though.
- Oh, really?

I made myself a morning person
because of my kids.

I know, but I also feel like
I did that so many years.

I got that
you do your own thing,

you take up space
in the house,

and everyone
revolves around you.

And then it really struck me
because that daughter of yours,

Hailey, who is so amazing--
- Thank you.

She gives to
your other children

the type of mothering
that she wishes she had.

She said, "You see me."

I felt like that means
that she has felt unseen.

Mm-hmm.

From one mom to another,

try to meet your kids
where they are.

A part of them
still wants to be seen by you.

Yeah, yeah.

I noticed that Craig takes
the kids to school every day.

Mm-hmm.

I know he's doing
what he does in the house

out of love for you.
- Mm-hmm.

I would, like,
impart upon you, like,

maybe a day or two
during the week,

like, help him out.
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Because what I foresee
happening,

is you guys are going to
just exchange burnout. Like--

He also, like,
he's a little bit of a martyr.

Also, wait, I just--
can I say something, real quick?

Yeah, give it to me
'cause I-I gave it right to you.

- I know you did.
- Welcome to Housewives 101.

Okay, go ahead.

I think that
my biggest takeaway,

is that the kids feel like
it's too scheduled,

and there's not enough fun.

I want you to build in
some more flexible free time.

Flexible free time, okay.

So that they can find
their passions, their hobbies,

and they can find joy.
You can find joy.

Flexibility, fun,
and free time.

- Yes.
- I love that.

Do you think that
you're gonna keep

the basketball hoop?

That's the first thing
I'm taking down when you leave.

- Really?
- It has to go.

- There's nothing breakable.
- Take that with you.

Why?

What is the worst case
scenario?

I don't know.

Maybe coming home
to a red carpet, Alethea.

I don't know.

- It'll be okay.
- Girl...

But, also, thank you
for opening up your home to me.

Yes.

Thank you
for ruining my carpet.

Yes.

My conversation with Wendy,
she reminded me that

as much as I want to
empower my kids,

and I want them
to be independent,

they still need a mom.
They still want their mommy.

- Hey, moms.
- Hey.

- Hey, guys.
- We're back.

Hey, guys.

Alethea's about to go
bye-bye.

I think I have a lot
of work to do,

being even a better team player
with Craig

and maybe doing
a little bit more housework,

and I don't like that,
but I will do it.

Bye.
- Bye.

Aww, I hope you get to
keep the basketball, guys.

I-I really, like,
I-I really campaigned for ya.

So, we'll see what happens.

All right.
- Thank you so much.

- Yes.
- You're so great.

Thank you.
- Thank you so much.

Send my love
to my kids over there.

I will.
Love you, guys.

- Bye.
- See you soon.

All right.
Thank you for everything.

- Safe travels.
- Thank you.

I learned from
the Shapiro family

there is space to give my kids
more latitude for free play.

I think I'll leave
the basketball hoop

in the kitchen
for a few days.

By the weekend,
it's gone.

- The fun time's gonna be gone.
- Back to the rules we go.

I don't want your rules.
I want Miss Alethea's rules.

Alethea gave me
this bracelet,

and it says "It's okay.
You're okay. Breathe."

Oh, how transformational.

Almost home.

Hey, oh, Skyler, oh!

!

What'd you think about
my eggs that I made?

- They were egg-cellent.
- Oh, that was a good one!

- You're 11.
- Oh, my God!

Y'all are crocheting?

Let's breathe.