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1
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As you all know,
the state hired us
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00:00:08,921 --> 00:00:11,098
to help decide which
of the four Hollywood DMVs
3
00:00:11,228 --> 00:00:13,752
is going to be impacted.
4
00:00:13,883 --> 00:00:16,364
So, for the past seven months,
we have been in and out
5
00:00:16,494 --> 00:00:18,409
of each branch,
observing day-to-day operations.
6
00:00:18,540 --> 00:00:20,194
I don't remember them
being here.
7
00:00:20,324 --> 00:00:21,717
I don't remember throwing
my life away
8
00:00:21,804 --> 00:00:23,980
in a series of dead-end jobs,
but yet, here we are.
9
00:00:24,154 --> 00:00:26,243
We have watched
how you handle pressure...
10
00:00:26,330 --> 00:00:28,289
How's this for distribution?!
11
00:00:28,419 --> 00:00:30,160
Throw something heavier!
12
00:00:30,291 --> 00:00:31,466
[imitating Kshitija]:
Try the printer!
13
00:00:31,553 --> 00:00:32,858
KSHITIJA:
...worked together as a team...
14
00:00:32,989 --> 00:00:34,512
Say, "Merry everything!"
15
00:00:34,686 --> 00:00:36,297
Go, go, go.
16
00:00:36,427 --> 00:00:37,428
-Stop touching me.
-BARB: Three, two, one.
17
00:00:37,559 --> 00:00:39,213
-[exclaiming]
-[camera shutter clicks]
18
00:00:39,343 --> 00:00:40,344
-Oh, we missed it!
-KSHITIJA: ...and navigated
19
00:00:40,475 --> 00:00:42,216
daily hardships.
20
00:00:42,999 --> 00:00:44,914
[groans] I hate this chair.
21
00:00:45,958 --> 00:00:47,482
Come on, stop fooling around.
22
00:00:48,526 --> 00:00:51,007
And after extensive analyzing,
23
00:00:51,138 --> 00:00:52,487
interviewing and assessing...
24
00:00:52,574 --> 00:00:53,792
The verdict is in.
25
00:00:53,923 --> 00:00:55,925
KSHITIJA:
Our conclusion is...
26
00:00:56,056 --> 00:00:58,493
-Drumroll.
-BARB: Here we go.
27
00:00:58,580 --> 00:01:00,495
-Here we go, here we go.
-Nails, nails, nails.
28
00:01:00,625 --> 00:01:03,106
People do not typically enjoy
coming to the DMV.
29
00:01:03,237 --> 00:01:06,066
-[group murmuring]
-We will be back in two days
30
00:01:06,153 --> 00:01:08,111
to make
our closure recommendation.
31
00:01:08,242 --> 00:01:10,548
Uh, excuse me. How much
did this little analysis
32
00:01:10,679 --> 00:01:12,637
cost the beautiful state
of California?
33
00:01:12,811 --> 00:01:14,509
31 million big smackers.
34
00:01:14,639 --> 00:01:17,338
[Gregg chuckling]
35
00:01:19,731 --> 00:01:22,082
Perfect. No notes.
36
00:01:22,169 --> 00:01:24,127
♪ ♪
37
00:01:27,304 --> 00:01:29,306
-COLETTE: Yep. Yep. Yes.
-NOA: Oh. Okay.
38
00:01:29,393 --> 00:01:31,395
-COLETTE: Yep. Yep. Whoa.
-[engine chugging]
39
00:01:31,526 --> 00:01:32,875
NOA:
So, how'd I do?
40
00:01:32,962 --> 00:01:34,616
Did I finally pass my road test?
41
00:01:34,746 --> 00:01:36,008
[Colette clicks tongue]
42
00:01:36,139 --> 00:01:39,402
Noa, Noa, Noa, um...
let's talk inside.
43
00:01:39,533 --> 00:01:41,275
[Noa groans]
44
00:01:42,753 --> 00:01:44,887
GROUP:
Surprise!
45
00:01:44,973 --> 00:01:46,149
[whooping]
46
00:01:46,280 --> 00:01:47,585
-Wait, did I pass?
-You passed.
47
00:01:47,716 --> 00:01:49,065
-Wow.
-VIC: All right, Kiwi,
48
00:01:49,196 --> 00:01:50,762
as a reward,
we're gonna smash glutes
49
00:01:50,893 --> 00:01:52,590
-and hammies tomorrow.
-NOA [laughing]: Sure. Okay.
50
00:01:52,764 --> 00:01:54,679
Thank you.
51
00:01:54,810 --> 00:01:56,027
-"Congarts."
-BARB: Typo.
52
00:01:56,203 --> 00:01:57,551
Got it on a discount.
53
00:01:57,639 --> 00:01:59,380
Well, thank you for the party,
Colette.
54
00:01:59,509 --> 00:02:00,946
Well, actually, it was my idea.
55
00:02:01,077 --> 00:02:03,123
Tanya's hosting mah-jongg
at our house tonight,
56
00:02:03,253 --> 00:02:04,776
so this gave me a reason
to not go home.
57
00:02:04,863 --> 00:02:05,908
-Oh.
-CECI: Well, we got drinks.
58
00:02:06,038 --> 00:02:07,170
We got karaoke.
59
00:02:07,301 --> 00:02:09,041
Jilloyce was, uh,
lobbying for trivia,
60
00:02:09,172 --> 00:02:10,434
but don't worry, I shot it down.
61
00:02:11,435 --> 00:02:13,655
You should invite, uh, Mary
if you want to.
62
00:02:13,785 --> 00:02:15,526
Hey, we broke up
a couple of weeks ago.
63
00:02:15,657 --> 00:02:17,659
Oh. Oh, oh, oh.
64
00:02:17,789 --> 00:02:19,182
The Barb is open!
65
00:02:19,313 --> 00:02:20,923
-Yes, the Barb!
-[cheering]
66
00:02:21,053 --> 00:02:23,317
-Welcome to th...
-The Barb.
67
00:02:23,491 --> 00:02:25,841
I see and smell that you have
your walking boot off.
68
00:02:25,971 --> 00:02:28,539
We've got a license to party.
69
00:02:28,670 --> 00:02:29,845
I thought you would be
more nervous.
70
00:02:29,975 --> 00:02:31,586
In two days, we might find out
71
00:02:31,673 --> 00:02:33,501
if they're closing down
this den of agony.
72
00:02:33,675 --> 00:02:36,939
Remember how we got a Honk Out
in DMV magazine 10 and 2?
73
00:02:37,113 --> 00:02:39,680
Yes, I do, because you put
an inflatable tube man out front
74
00:02:39,855 --> 00:02:42,204
with a sign that says,
"We got a Honk Out in
75
00:02:42,336 --> 00:02:44,468
the DMV magazine10 and 2."
76
00:02:44,599 --> 00:02:46,078
Well, after that
morning meeting,
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00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:49,038
director of the DMV
Ray Henderson himself
78
00:02:49,168 --> 00:02:50,909
called to congratulate us.
79
00:02:51,083 --> 00:02:52,737
Wow. What kind of Scotch
do you have?
80
00:02:52,868 --> 00:02:54,739
-Uh, sure,
I'll play the message.
-That's not what I...
81
00:02:54,870 --> 00:02:57,264
RAY [recorded]:
Barb Berry, Ray Henderson here.
82
00:02:57,351 --> 00:02:59,701
Congratulations on the Honk Out.
Well done.
83
00:02:59,875 --> 00:03:00,876
Drive safe.
84
00:03:01,006 --> 00:03:02,965
[laughs] "Drive safe."
85
00:03:03,095 --> 00:03:04,271
The man knows how to finish.
86
00:03:04,445 --> 00:03:05,837
-I guess.
-All right.
87
00:03:05,924 --> 00:03:07,187
What am I gonna say
when I call him back?
88
00:03:07,317 --> 00:03:09,319
I would say this.
89
00:03:10,929 --> 00:03:12,496
You're not saying anything.
[chuckles]
90
00:03:12,670 --> 00:03:14,063
I'll say it again.
91
00:03:14,150 --> 00:03:15,282
["Dancing with Myself"
karaoke track playing]
92
00:03:15,412 --> 00:03:17,936
You're not...
Oh, come on, Gregg.
93
00:03:18,023 --> 00:03:20,765
♪ There's nothing to prove
and I'm dancing with myself♪
94
00:03:20,939 --> 00:03:22,114
♪ Oh, oh, uh-oh♪
95
00:03:23,986 --> 00:03:26,293
♪ If I looked
all over the world♪
96
00:03:26,423 --> 00:03:28,556
♪ And there's
every type of girl♪
97
00:03:28,686 --> 00:03:31,820
♪ Well, their empty eyes
seem to pass me by♪
98
00:03:31,950 --> 00:03:34,301
♪ And I'm dancing with myself♪
99
00:03:34,475 --> 00:03:37,478
♪ So let's sink another drink♪
100
00:03:37,608 --> 00:03:39,654
♪ 'Cause it'll give me
time to think♪
101
00:03:39,741 --> 00:03:42,309
♪ If I had my chance,
I'd ask the world to dance♪
102
00:03:42,483 --> 00:03:44,615
♪ And I'll be dancing
with myself♪
103
00:03:44,746 --> 00:03:47,009
-[feedback squeals, music stops]
-♪ Oh, oh, oh.♪
104
00:03:47,139 --> 00:03:48,924
Oh, no, no. Technical issue.
105
00:03:49,054 --> 00:03:51,143
Well, if we cannot sing,
we will drink.
106
00:03:51,274 --> 00:03:52,449
-To the Barb.
-To the Barb.
107
00:03:52,536 --> 00:03:54,668
Hey. I iso'd the tech ish.
108
00:03:54,799 --> 00:03:56,279
We got a mic out.
109
00:03:56,410 --> 00:03:57,933
Yeah,
I was a roadie for a summer.
110
00:03:58,063 --> 00:04:00,457
Yeah, I untangled
all the extension cords.
111
00:04:00,544 --> 00:04:02,329
Pretty much
the head honch of power.
112
00:04:02,503 --> 00:04:03,939
You should probably add that
to your résumé
113
00:04:04,113 --> 00:04:05,506
in case this place closes down.
114
00:04:05,593 --> 00:04:06,811
Nah, I don't need one of those.
115
00:04:06,942 --> 00:04:08,596
Jobs tend to find me.
116
00:04:08,770 --> 00:04:10,511
The unemployment rate is at
an all-time high right now.
117
00:04:10,598 --> 00:04:12,687
When's the last time
you even applied to get a job?
118
00:04:12,817 --> 00:04:14,254
Eight years ago,
119
00:04:14,428 --> 00:04:15,994
when I came here for my license
and never left.
120
00:04:16,168 --> 00:04:18,519
Well, unless you play the drums
on TikTok, it's tough out there.
121
00:04:18,649 --> 00:04:19,694
[chuckles]
122
00:04:19,824 --> 00:04:21,696
♪ ♪
123
00:04:25,830 --> 00:04:28,572
How many lice
do you reckon are in this?
124
00:04:28,703 --> 00:04:30,922
-All of them.
-Ah, yum.
125
00:04:31,009 --> 00:04:32,183
-[chuckling]
-Oh.
126
00:04:32,359 --> 00:04:34,404
-It's an ambush.
-[laughing]
127
00:04:34,534 --> 00:04:35,666
You just ambushed me.
128
00:04:35,797 --> 00:04:37,581
I'm sorry, cowboy.
129
00:04:37,755 --> 00:04:40,541
♪
130
00:04:53,902 --> 00:04:55,469
VIC:
Hey, bro, little help?
131
00:04:55,599 --> 00:04:57,775
-Yeah.
-I'm working on my re-zoom.
132
00:04:57,862 --> 00:05:00,169
-Résumé?
-How do you spell "experience"?
133
00:05:00,343 --> 00:05:01,344
Uh, lose the "y."
134
00:05:01,431 --> 00:05:02,650
-Ah.
-BARB: Gregg.
135
00:05:02,824 --> 00:05:03,955
Which one?
136
00:05:04,042 --> 00:05:05,957
Gregg. Remember when
you suggested
137
00:05:06,044 --> 00:05:08,395
that I not call
Ray Henderson back?
138
00:05:09,265 --> 00:05:11,920
-What if I told you that I did?
-Oh, no. What did you say?
139
00:05:12,050 --> 00:05:13,443
That's where
it gets interesting.
140
00:05:13,530 --> 00:05:15,184
-I don't know what I said.
-VIC: Barb.
141
00:05:15,315 --> 00:05:16,838
How much you have to drank?
142
00:05:17,012 --> 00:05:18,883
One Barb-garita, and I made
sure not to eat all day
143
00:05:19,057 --> 00:05:21,059
so it wouldn't mix with
my antibiotics that I'm taking.
144
00:05:21,190 --> 00:05:22,496
How long was the phone call?
145
00:05:22,670 --> 00:05:24,976
Well, my phone says
only 47 seconds, so...
146
00:05:25,107 --> 00:05:26,195
Hold on.
147
00:05:27,283 --> 00:05:29,981
For context,
that was only two seconds.
148
00:05:30,112 --> 00:05:32,332
Why do you keep teaching me
lessons with silence?
149
00:05:32,419 --> 00:05:33,811
[panting]
150
00:05:33,898 --> 00:05:35,247
[grunts in frustration]
151
00:05:37,206 --> 00:05:38,903
"Experience" means sexual,
right?
152
00:05:39,774 --> 00:05:40,992
Correct.
153
00:05:41,166 --> 00:05:43,255
♪
154
00:05:43,386 --> 00:05:44,866
[sighs]:
All right.
155
00:05:44,996 --> 00:05:46,215
-Hi. [chuckles]
-Hey.
156
00:05:46,389 --> 00:05:47,303
-Uh-uh.
-Hey.
157
00:05:47,433 --> 00:05:48,652
You two kissed.
158
00:05:48,826 --> 00:05:51,220
What? How'd you know that?
159
00:05:51,351 --> 00:05:53,308
Because, Colette,
I am a gifted reader of people.
160
00:05:53,440 --> 00:05:54,789
Plus, the photo
of you two kissing
161
00:05:54,876 --> 00:05:56,659
-showed up on my computer.
-Oh, yeah.
162
00:05:56,834 --> 00:05:58,662
-So, how was it?
-Good.
163
00:05:58,836 --> 00:06:00,316
Good, good, good.
164
00:06:01,012 --> 00:06:03,014
-So, bad.
-Hmm?
165
00:06:03,145 --> 00:06:04,668
Bad, bad, bad.
166
00:06:04,842 --> 00:06:06,366
It wasn't bad.
It wasn't terrible.
167
00:06:06,453 --> 00:06:08,324
It wasn't the worst kiss
I've ever had.
168
00:06:08,455 --> 00:06:09,456
Better or worse than that time
169
00:06:09,630 --> 00:06:10,674
you had to give mouth-to-mouth
to Jilloyce?
170
00:06:10,848 --> 00:06:12,328
Um...
171
00:06:13,808 --> 00:06:16,419
Oh, my God,
you have to think about it?
172
00:06:16,550 --> 00:06:17,507
It's-it's not
that big of a deal.
173
00:06:17,638 --> 00:06:19,204
Uh, it's the only deal, Colette.
174
00:06:19,335 --> 00:06:21,555
You obviously didn't feel
anything in your downstairs.
175
00:06:21,685 --> 00:06:25,254
And if it didn't hit,
you must a-quit... him.
176
00:06:25,385 --> 00:06:26,908
You need to listen
to your body, Colette.
177
00:06:27,082 --> 00:06:29,301
-I know.
-And it's saying, "Colette,
178
00:06:29,476 --> 00:06:31,347
"you know, we thought
we liked Noa,
179
00:06:31,478 --> 00:06:33,523
-but we actually don't."
-Who's "we"?
180
00:06:33,654 --> 00:06:35,830
It's also saying,
"Please stop dressing me like
181
00:06:35,917 --> 00:06:37,701
-an American Girl doll."
-But I do like him.
182
00:06:37,875 --> 00:06:40,617
One not-so-amazing kiss
doesn't change that.
183
00:06:40,748 --> 00:06:43,707
Ah, it should.
Your downstairs never lies.
184
00:06:43,838 --> 00:06:45,274
And if your downstairs is
fighting with your upstairs,
185
00:06:45,405 --> 00:06:47,102
do you want to know
who wins that fight?
186
00:06:47,232 --> 00:06:48,495
-Apple. [chuckles]
-Hey.
187
00:06:48,625 --> 00:06:49,757
-[chuckles]
-[Colette chuckles]
188
00:06:49,887 --> 00:06:51,933
-Um, hey, Colette.
-Hmm?
189
00:06:52,063 --> 00:06:53,848
You and me, dinner tonight?
190
00:06:53,978 --> 00:06:55,893
Yes, please.
191
00:06:56,067 --> 00:06:57,939
Okay. Sweet.
192
00:06:58,069 --> 00:06:59,244
[whispers]:
No one wins.
193
00:06:59,331 --> 00:07:01,333
Nobody wins that fight.
194
00:07:01,464 --> 00:07:03,335
-I'm gonna win.
-Mm. Mm, mm.
195
00:07:08,166 --> 00:07:10,125
I can't believe I drunk-dialed
Ray Henderson.
196
00:07:10,255 --> 00:07:12,040
-What?
-Good God, Barb.
197
00:07:12,170 --> 00:07:14,172
I can hear you moaning
from the waiting room.
198
00:07:14,346 --> 00:07:15,739
All my hard work
to save the branch,
199
00:07:15,870 --> 00:07:19,526
a complete waste of time because
of one stupid phone call!
200
00:07:19,656 --> 00:07:21,571
Oh, Barb, your hard work
has always been
201
00:07:21,745 --> 00:07:23,181
a complete waste of time.
202
00:07:23,312 --> 00:07:24,792
You're just saying that.
203
00:07:24,922 --> 00:07:26,184
Look, they are gonna choose
what branch to close
204
00:07:26,358 --> 00:07:28,186
based on something
you will never see coming.
205
00:07:28,317 --> 00:07:29,492
-[cell phone chimes]
-[sighs]
206
00:07:29,623 --> 00:07:31,059
Text from Ray Henderson.
207
00:07:31,189 --> 00:07:32,887
"Got your message.
208
00:07:33,017 --> 00:07:34,454
Not happy."
209
00:07:34,628 --> 00:07:35,977
-Ray Henderson's not happy.
-[cell phone chimes]
210
00:07:36,107 --> 00:07:38,370
"What do I need to do
to make all this go away?"
211
00:07:38,501 --> 00:07:40,634
What? I don't even know
what I said.
212
00:07:40,808 --> 00:07:43,550
I'll send him an emoji
that's like, "Hmm."
213
00:07:43,680 --> 00:07:45,421
-No, no.
-Okay, fine. I'll send him
214
00:07:45,552 --> 00:07:47,162
an emoji that's like... [groans]
215
00:07:47,249 --> 00:07:50,774
No, Barb. He must have done
something bad, and...
216
00:07:50,948 --> 00:07:52,384
whatever you said
in that phone call
217
00:07:52,515 --> 00:07:54,212
makes him think that you know.
218
00:07:54,343 --> 00:07:56,563
-I don't know.
-Doesn't matter.
219
00:07:56,693 --> 00:07:59,827
At the DMV, the less you know,
the more power you have.
220
00:08:01,002 --> 00:08:03,439
I think we may have stumbled
onto some leverage here.
221
00:08:03,570 --> 00:08:06,398
Greggory, are you suggesting
that we blackmail Ray Henderson,
222
00:08:06,573 --> 00:08:08,313
director of the California DMV?
223
00:08:08,444 --> 00:08:10,925
-Mm-mm-mm.
-I would never.
224
00:08:11,012 --> 00:08:11,969
For what?
225
00:08:12,100 --> 00:08:13,623
As a bargaining chip
226
00:08:13,754 --> 00:08:16,017
for the survival of our branch.
227
00:08:16,147 --> 00:08:18,410
I ought to send you
one of these emojis.
228
00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:21,936
I know why the kiss wasn't good.
229
00:08:22,066 --> 00:08:23,851
'Cause you and Noa
have less chemistry
230
00:08:23,981 --> 00:08:25,809
than the sexless crash test
dummies in the supply closet?
231
00:08:25,940 --> 00:08:29,160
No, because we were here.
232
00:08:29,291 --> 00:08:32,381
I mean, is there anything
less sexy than the DMV?
233
00:08:32,554 --> 00:08:34,338
Mm. This.
234
00:08:35,384 --> 00:08:37,299
COLETTE:
Yes, look. I mean,
the lighting was bad,
235
00:08:37,472 --> 00:08:39,693
the music was bad,
and it smelled like the DMV.
236
00:08:39,823 --> 00:08:44,001
Fix all of that,
and my downstairs is on fuego.
237
00:08:44,087 --> 00:08:45,263
I'm gonna call you
at the end of the night,
238
00:08:45,394 --> 00:08:46,569
tell you all about it.
239
00:08:46,700 --> 00:08:48,615
Ooh, ooh, ooh.
Or wait till morning
240
00:08:48,745 --> 00:08:50,312
and don't tell me
anything about it.
241
00:08:50,399 --> 00:08:51,922
Okay.
242
00:08:52,053 --> 00:08:53,881
Hey, you look like
a boring adult.
243
00:08:54,011 --> 00:08:55,665
I'm workshopping my re-zoom.
244
00:08:55,796 --> 00:08:57,101
What sounds more impressive?
245
00:08:57,232 --> 00:08:58,973
Analyst or consultant?
246
00:08:59,103 --> 00:09:01,932
It's for when I was a bouncer
at Big Tatas Gentlemen's Club...
247
00:09:02,063 --> 00:09:03,630
and Buffet.
248
00:09:03,804 --> 00:09:05,762
Beatboxing. Yay or nay?
249
00:09:05,893 --> 00:09:09,070
I took a class on it,
so slap it under educaish?
250
00:09:09,200 --> 00:09:11,246
[beatboxing]:
Freakin' fresh. R-R-Rewind.
251
00:09:11,376 --> 00:09:13,727
If there was a little
exaggeraish on my re-zoom,
252
00:09:13,901 --> 00:09:15,467
would there be any way
a Fortune 500 company
253
00:09:15,642 --> 00:09:17,121
could fact-check that?
254
00:09:17,252 --> 00:09:19,733
Like if I said I was
the president of Advil?
255
00:09:19,863 --> 00:09:20,995
[snaps fingers]
256
00:09:21,125 --> 00:09:23,998
You're right. Vice president...
257
00:09:24,172 --> 00:09:25,565
of pills.
258
00:09:25,695 --> 00:09:27,088
Okay, Ray should be calling
any second.
259
00:09:27,262 --> 00:09:28,916
Are you sure this is
the right thing to do?
260
00:09:29,046 --> 00:09:31,788
Yes. We've been given a gift,
and we're gonna use it.
261
00:09:31,875 --> 00:09:34,486
I wonder what he did
that was so bad.
262
00:09:34,574 --> 00:09:36,271
Did he, like,
sleep with a subordinate,
263
00:09:36,358 --> 00:09:39,665
or-- oh!-- maybe he
exposed himself on Zoom.
264
00:09:39,796 --> 00:09:41,972
Hot tip:
Even if your camera's off,
265
00:09:42,103 --> 00:09:44,235
a Zoom mic can pick up a toot
from ten feet away.
266
00:09:44,366 --> 00:09:46,890
I am so glad you're my boss.
267
00:09:47,021 --> 00:09:49,240
[fanfare ringtone playing]
268
00:09:49,371 --> 00:09:52,461
Sir, may I say,
I respect you greatly.
269
00:09:52,635 --> 00:09:54,158
RAY:
Don't play games with me.
270
00:09:54,289 --> 00:09:55,769
I've got your message
right here.
271
00:09:55,899 --> 00:09:58,598
BARB [recorded]:
Ray Henderson, what's up?
272
00:09:58,728 --> 00:10:00,556
It's Barb Berry from East Ho.
273
00:10:00,687 --> 00:10:02,340
I can't believe what you did.
274
00:10:02,471 --> 00:10:05,256
I'm gonna tell everybody, and
I'm never gonna forget it.
275
00:10:05,387 --> 00:10:07,737
What were you talking about?
276
00:10:07,824 --> 00:10:10,784
Him calling to congratulate us
on our Honk Out in 10 and 2.
277
00:10:10,914 --> 00:10:14,048
RAY:
Before you ask for the moon,
here's where I'm at:
278
00:10:14,178 --> 00:10:17,094
I'm willing to make sure
your branch stays open.
279
00:10:17,225 --> 00:10:19,009
-Yes!
-And in exchange,
280
00:10:19,140 --> 00:10:20,968
you tell nobody
that I've been dipping into
281
00:10:21,098 --> 00:10:22,839
the employee pension fund.
282
00:10:22,970 --> 00:10:24,275
That tracks.
283
00:10:24,362 --> 00:10:27,801
A political appointee
turns out to be corrupt.
284
00:10:28,671 --> 00:10:29,541
Gasp.
285
00:10:29,716 --> 00:10:31,326
Take a second to think about it.
286
00:10:31,413 --> 00:10:33,937
Do I take the deal
and save our branch?
287
00:10:34,068 --> 00:10:35,678
Or side with the man
that's screwing over
288
00:10:35,765 --> 00:10:37,419
thousands of DMV employees
289
00:10:37,593 --> 00:10:40,727
who put up with disrespect,
low wages,
290
00:10:40,857 --> 00:10:42,816
broken office chairs,
291
00:10:42,990 --> 00:10:45,340
all for the promise
of a stable retirement?
292
00:10:45,427 --> 00:10:47,429
-Still there?
-I know what you'd do,
293
00:10:47,559 --> 00:10:48,560
Beau Young.
294
00:10:48,735 --> 00:10:50,214
You'd take the deal.
295
00:10:50,388 --> 00:10:51,520
So, do we have a deal?
296
00:10:51,651 --> 00:10:52,869
No deal!
297
00:10:53,000 --> 00:10:54,001
Hello, Barb,
298
00:10:54,131 --> 00:10:55,742
-you still there?
-Oh.
299
00:10:56,438 --> 00:10:57,526
Do it again.
300
00:10:57,657 --> 00:10:59,354
-No deal.
-You're making a big--
301
00:10:59,441 --> 00:11:00,790
[sighs]
Sounded better the first time.
302
00:11:00,921 --> 00:11:02,444
-Should I call him back?
-No.
303
00:11:04,968 --> 00:11:07,754
-Just gonna put some music on.
-Yeah.
304
00:11:07,884 --> 00:11:09,320
AUDIOBOOK NARRATOR:
Do you have trouble
setting boundaries?
305
00:11:09,407 --> 00:11:10,887
-Oh.
-In this chapter, we will...
306
00:11:10,974 --> 00:11:13,716
Someone with adult-onset
codependency issues
307
00:11:13,847 --> 00:11:15,544
-must have snuck in here.
-[both laughing]
308
00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:17,198
[romantic music playing softly]
309
00:11:17,372 --> 00:11:19,461
-Yeah.
-Hmm.
310
00:11:19,591 --> 00:11:21,768
This is... this is nice.
311
00:11:21,942 --> 00:11:23,813
Yeah.
312
00:11:29,297 --> 00:11:31,125
Oh, y-you went forehead.
313
00:11:31,255 --> 00:11:32,953
-Yeah.
-Okay.
314
00:11:33,997 --> 00:11:35,564
Do you feel safe?
315
00:11:35,695 --> 00:11:39,220
Ew. I mean, oh, what?
316
00:11:39,350 --> 00:11:40,308
Because you are.
317
00:11:40,395 --> 00:11:42,005
You are... you're safe.
318
00:11:42,136 --> 00:11:44,138
-Yes.
-Boop.
319
00:11:45,705 --> 00:11:47,054
Yeah.
320
00:11:47,184 --> 00:11:48,577
-Yes, let's just...
-[stammers] Yeah.
321
00:11:48,751 --> 00:11:50,274
Hmm? [stammers]
322
00:11:50,405 --> 00:11:51,319
-Don't.
-Shh.
323
00:11:51,449 --> 00:11:53,060
-Okay.
-[both giggling]
324
00:11:53,234 --> 00:11:54,583
-Mm-hmm. Mm.
-Okay.
325
00:11:56,019 --> 00:11:57,194
Hello, you.
326
00:11:57,281 --> 00:11:59,066
Oh. I can't. I-I can't do this.
327
00:11:59,196 --> 00:12:01,851
That's a relief,
'cause I-I don't... Me, neither.
328
00:12:01,982 --> 00:12:05,246
Oh. Why-why... why can't you?
329
00:12:05,376 --> 00:12:07,552
It's a lot of pressure
to, like... to be your first,
330
00:12:07,639 --> 00:12:09,946
-so I'm just... yeah.
-Hold on.
331
00:12:10,033 --> 00:12:11,469
Do you think I'm a virgin?
332
00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:12,644
-You... Aren't you?
-No.
333
00:12:12,775 --> 00:12:14,472
-Oh, my God.
-Oh.
334
00:12:14,646 --> 00:12:15,952
What made you think that?
335
00:12:16,039 --> 00:12:18,563
I think I read it
on the bathroom wall originally,
336
00:12:18,694 --> 00:12:20,043
but it just... it made sense,
337
00:12:20,217 --> 00:12:22,219
given you've always been
so awkward around me.
338
00:12:22,350 --> 00:12:25,614
And last night, after we kissed,
you just left so quickly.
339
00:12:25,788 --> 00:12:27,094
'Cause the kiss sucked.
340
00:12:27,224 --> 00:12:28,486
Oh.
341
00:12:29,879 --> 00:12:31,272
-Oh.
-NARRATOR: Chapter three.
342
00:12:31,402 --> 00:12:32,490
-Oh, my God.
-From pleasing people
343
00:12:32,621 --> 00:12:33,840
to pleasuring yourself.
344
00:12:34,014 --> 00:12:35,058
That's...
345
00:12:35,232 --> 00:12:37,669
-Just... Yeah.
-Yeah, I'll... Yeah.
346
00:12:43,980 --> 00:12:45,982
♪ ♪
347
00:12:48,332 --> 00:12:49,812
How could you?
348
00:12:51,205 --> 00:12:53,076
♪ ♪
349
00:12:57,689 --> 00:12:59,039
What's up with the big cheese?
350
00:12:59,169 --> 00:13:00,780
She lost her hero and found out
351
00:13:00,910 --> 00:13:02,999
that everything
she believed in is a lie.
352
00:13:03,130 --> 00:13:07,569
Mm. Well, speaking of lies,
finished up my résumé.
353
00:13:07,743 --> 00:13:11,312
And I learned
it's pronounced "résumé."
354
00:13:11,442 --> 00:13:15,359
Why did you list your height,
wingspan and mile time on here?
355
00:13:15,490 --> 00:13:17,100
Oh, that's a six-minute mile
356
00:13:17,231 --> 00:13:19,886
with my neighbor's chunky kid
Yoda-ing on my back.
357
00:13:20,016 --> 00:13:22,105
Hmm. What about putting
your last name
358
00:13:22,236 --> 00:13:24,020
or the year you graduated
359
00:13:24,107 --> 00:13:26,240
or a way for them
to contact you?
360
00:13:26,370 --> 00:13:28,633
If they want me bad enough,
they'll know how to find me.
361
00:13:28,764 --> 00:13:29,504
Plus, I didn't graduate
high school.
362
00:13:29,678 --> 00:13:31,027
You didn't?
363
00:13:31,114 --> 00:13:33,029
You were in high school
longer than anybody.
364
00:13:33,203 --> 00:13:36,424
[chuckles] What, you think
that matters I didn't graduate?
365
00:13:36,554 --> 00:13:38,165
Only to employers.
366
00:13:38,295 --> 00:13:40,907
So you're saying I can't lie
and I need education?
367
00:13:41,037 --> 00:13:44,040
This is not
the America I voted for.
368
00:13:45,302 --> 00:13:46,956
♪ ♪
369
00:13:47,087 --> 00:13:48,262
Noa thought I was a virgin.
370
00:13:48,436 --> 00:13:50,351
I could see that.
371
00:13:50,481 --> 00:13:51,613
The whole night was awful.
372
00:13:51,743 --> 00:13:54,137
I cannot believe I wasted
373
00:13:54,311 --> 00:13:57,488
all this time and energy on him,
and now what?
374
00:13:57,662 --> 00:13:59,490
That's it. There's just...
375
00:13:59,621 --> 00:14:01,144
There is nothing there.
376
00:14:01,275 --> 00:14:02,537
It's kind of like
how Barb invested
377
00:14:02,667 --> 00:14:04,104
so much into saving this branch,
378
00:14:04,234 --> 00:14:06,628
and now it just...
it could all be gone.
379
00:14:06,758 --> 00:14:09,022
That's right, I forgot.
I might be out of a job, too.
380
00:14:09,152 --> 00:14:11,154
-It's just one guy.
-No, it's not.
381
00:14:11,328 --> 00:14:12,721
It's everything.
382
00:14:12,808 --> 00:14:14,114
When I took this job
six years ago,
383
00:14:14,244 --> 00:14:16,333
it was supposed to be temporary,
and I'm still here.
384
00:14:16,464 --> 00:14:19,206
I thought that Noa
might be the one for me,
385
00:14:19,336 --> 00:14:21,077
and he's just not.
386
00:14:21,164 --> 00:14:24,211
I just don't feel like
I'm making any progress.
387
00:14:24,341 --> 00:14:26,213
That's not true.
388
00:14:26,300 --> 00:14:27,736
Mira.
389
00:14:27,910 --> 00:14:29,912
-Okay.
-[typing]
390
00:14:31,566 --> 00:14:32,784
COLETTE:
Why?
391
00:14:32,959 --> 00:14:34,786
Relax, okay?
392
00:14:34,874 --> 00:14:38,138
-'Cause then you become... her.
-Yeah.
393
00:14:38,225 --> 00:14:39,313
Is this supposed
to make me feel better?
394
00:14:39,443 --> 00:14:42,490
And now you are...
395
00:14:43,491 --> 00:14:45,188
COLETTE:
Oh, I lost those earrings.
396
00:14:45,275 --> 00:14:47,016
Colette, you're not going around
in circles, okay?
397
00:14:47,190 --> 00:14:50,106
You're... you're changing
without even noticing it.
398
00:14:50,193 --> 00:14:51,629
Realizing what you don't want
399
00:14:51,760 --> 00:14:53,588
is exactly how you figure out
what you do.
400
00:14:53,675 --> 00:14:55,938
I mean, that's...
that's progress.
401
00:14:56,025 --> 00:14:57,244
♪ ♪
402
00:14:57,418 --> 00:14:58,680
Um, over to the side...
403
00:14:58,767 --> 00:15:00,247
Yeah.
404
00:15:00,421 --> 00:15:01,770
Yeah, it is.
405
00:15:03,076 --> 00:15:05,034
Thank you, Ceci.
You're a good friend.
406
00:15:05,165 --> 00:15:08,255
I know, I know,
we're not "friends."
407
00:15:08,342 --> 00:15:11,823
I mean, we're, like,
work friends. [groans]
408
00:15:14,783 --> 00:15:16,350
The consultants are back.
409
00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:18,178
Okay.
410
00:15:18,265 --> 00:15:19,701
DAN:
All right, folks.
411
00:15:19,875 --> 00:15:22,138
We've already narrowed it down
from four to two.
412
00:15:22,312 --> 00:15:24,836
It's going to be either you
or North Hollywood.
413
00:15:24,924 --> 00:15:26,838
-Wait. What?
-What about South Hollywood?
414
00:15:27,013 --> 00:15:29,276
SoHo. They blow-Ho.
415
00:15:29,450 --> 00:15:31,713
Don't disagree,
but an employee there
416
00:15:31,887 --> 00:15:33,497
is suing us
for workman's comp, so...
417
00:15:33,584 --> 00:15:35,804
Can't shut down a branch
in the middle of a legal battle.
418
00:15:35,978 --> 00:15:37,588
Red tape city.
419
00:15:37,675 --> 00:15:39,373
KSHITIJA:
Before we head into
final deliberations,
420
00:15:39,460 --> 00:15:43,464
is there anything the manager
would like for us to note?
421
00:15:45,422 --> 00:15:47,294
No. I-I got nothing.
422
00:15:47,424 --> 00:15:48,556
[murmuring]
423
00:15:48,686 --> 00:15:50,297
Okay. Class dismissed.
424
00:15:50,471 --> 00:15:54,518
Want to hit up The Grove,
see if we can spot Mario Lopez?
425
00:15:54,605 --> 00:15:56,216
Again.
426
00:15:56,303 --> 00:15:58,653
♪ ♪
427
00:15:58,827 --> 00:16:01,047
You-you got nothing?
428
00:16:01,177 --> 00:16:02,744
That's it, Barb?
429
00:16:02,831 --> 00:16:06,052
I'm sorry, guys. I blew it.
430
00:16:06,226 --> 00:16:09,403
If I hadn't shut down
Gregg's chair lawsuit,
431
00:16:09,533 --> 00:16:11,057
we'd be safe.
432
00:16:11,187 --> 00:16:12,710
I'm a freaking idiot.
433
00:16:12,841 --> 00:16:14,712
You're not an idiot, Barb.
434
00:16:14,843 --> 00:16:17,063
And you didn't shut it down.
I did.
435
00:16:17,193 --> 00:16:19,239
-Wh-What?
-I withdrew the lawsuit.
436
00:16:19,326 --> 00:16:21,676
They were gonna give me
a bunch of money,
437
00:16:21,806 --> 00:16:23,330
but they wanted to fire you.
438
00:16:23,460 --> 00:16:25,027
So I told them to shove it.
439
00:16:26,507 --> 00:16:28,335
You-you did that for me?
440
00:16:28,465 --> 00:16:30,119
Nobody loves this job like you.
441
00:16:30,293 --> 00:16:32,774
Yeah. Come on.
442
00:16:32,904 --> 00:16:34,558
Now it's time to do your job.
443
00:16:34,689 --> 00:16:37,735
-Which means looking after us.
-COLETTE: Mm-hmm.
444
00:16:37,866 --> 00:16:40,303
I'm not qualified
for anything else.
445
00:16:40,434 --> 00:16:42,827
Big Tatas closed because of
a health code violation.
446
00:16:42,958 --> 00:16:44,915
I need the DMV, Barb.
447
00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:46,222
Those consultants,
they're right out there.
448
00:16:46,309 --> 00:16:48,355
-It's not too late.
-Yeah, come on, boss.
449
00:16:48,529 --> 00:16:52,272
Sometimes it's good to let
a thing go, but not this, Barb.
450
00:16:52,446 --> 00:16:53,969
You're Barb.
451
00:16:54,100 --> 00:16:56,363
You're Barb of
the East Hollywood DMV.
452
00:16:56,493 --> 00:16:58,278
-NOA: Yeah.
-CECI: Mm-hmm.
453
00:16:59,105 --> 00:17:00,541
No, no.
454
00:17:01,803 --> 00:17:04,153
We're all...
455
00:17:04,327 --> 00:17:08,201
Barb of the East Hollywood DMV.
456
00:17:09,332 --> 00:17:10,550
Fetch my vest.
457
00:17:10,681 --> 00:17:14,076
♪ ♪
458
00:17:20,821 --> 00:17:21,779
[whip cracks]
459
00:17:26,088 --> 00:17:28,047
♪
460
00:17:30,614 --> 00:17:31,876
[tires squealing]
461
00:17:32,007 --> 00:17:33,182
-[music stops]
-[all groaning]
462
00:17:35,271 --> 00:17:36,707
[muffled chatter]
463
00:17:38,187 --> 00:17:39,536
Is this heaven?
464
00:17:39,667 --> 00:17:41,147
Sure looks like it.
465
00:17:41,321 --> 00:17:42,583
DAN:
I'm so sorry. I didn't see you
466
00:17:42,713 --> 00:17:44,411
till you went flying
off my hood.
467
00:17:44,541 --> 00:17:46,326
I was caught up staring
at that awesome blowy guy.
468
00:17:46,456 --> 00:17:47,544
He was all doing this.
469
00:17:47,718 --> 00:17:49,807
BARB:
Wait. Wait.
470
00:17:49,938 --> 00:17:51,200
Barb, you have to go
to the hospital.
471
00:17:51,374 --> 00:17:52,767
I got something to say.
472
00:17:52,854 --> 00:17:55,813
Turn me to the weasel
and the pretty one.
473
00:17:55,944 --> 00:17:58,077
No, the other ones.
474
00:17:59,339 --> 00:18:00,427
Listen up.
475
00:18:00,557 --> 00:18:02,559
North Hollywood might be faster
476
00:18:02,646 --> 00:18:06,607
and more polished,
but what we got is more heart.
477
00:18:06,781 --> 00:18:09,610
-Mm-hmm.
-Yeah, we're a motley crew.
478
00:18:09,740 --> 00:18:13,004
We got a grump,
high school dropout,
479
00:18:13,179 --> 00:18:16,399
rich kid, princess,
480
00:18:16,530 --> 00:18:18,967
and a virgin,
but we're family.
481
00:18:19,098 --> 00:18:22,275
-I'm not a virgin.
-And families stick together.
482
00:18:23,798 --> 00:18:26,322
Upon careful reconsideration,
483
00:18:26,496 --> 00:18:30,631
I think North Hollywood is going
to be the impacted branch.
484
00:18:30,761 --> 00:18:32,111
Your branch is safe.
485
00:18:32,241 --> 00:18:33,460
Oh, my God.
486
00:18:33,634 --> 00:18:35,766
-Yes.
-Oh, my God.
487
00:18:35,897 --> 00:18:37,246
We're safe.
488
00:18:37,377 --> 00:18:38,987
My speech, it won you over?
489
00:18:39,118 --> 00:18:41,032
Yes, along with
the understanding
490
00:18:41,163 --> 00:18:43,252
that you are not
going to press charges
491
00:18:43,339 --> 00:18:46,081
against my superior
for reckless driving.
492
00:18:46,908 --> 00:18:48,127
BARB:
Deal.
493
00:18:48,257 --> 00:18:49,824
[group groaning]
494
00:18:49,954 --> 00:18:50,868
CECI:
It's okay, Barb.
495
00:18:51,042 --> 00:18:52,479
They'll sew a toe onto it.
496
00:18:52,653 --> 00:18:54,002
Trust me, good as new.
497
00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:56,091
My cousin's a mortician.
498
00:18:56,265 --> 00:18:59,225
If you'll excuse us,
uh, we have some bad news
499
00:18:59,312 --> 00:19:01,009
for Beau Young
over at North Hollywood.
500
00:19:01,140 --> 00:19:02,663
-Yeah, you do.
-Yeah.
501
00:19:02,793 --> 00:19:04,230
COLETTE:
Give him our best.
502
00:19:04,360 --> 00:19:06,797
Should I meet you
at the hospital?
503
00:19:06,928 --> 00:19:08,147
Absolutely not.
504
00:19:08,277 --> 00:19:10,018
Not till after your shift,
little lady.
505
00:19:10,149 --> 00:19:11,454
Don't worry, Barb, I will
506
00:19:11,585 --> 00:19:12,847
hold this place down
while you're gone, okay?
507
00:19:12,977 --> 00:19:14,544
Do you want my vest?
508
00:19:14,631 --> 00:19:16,242
No.
509
00:19:16,372 --> 00:19:17,982
'Cause there's blood
smeared all over it?
510
00:19:18,113 --> 00:19:19,941
It's because it's a vest.
511
00:19:20,071 --> 00:19:21,725
All right, people, let's go.
512
00:19:21,899 --> 00:19:22,944
You heard the boss.
513
00:19:23,118 --> 00:19:24,641
-We got a DMV to run.
-Okay.
514
00:19:25,642 --> 00:19:29,168
God. I hate this place.
515
00:19:29,298 --> 00:19:31,648
Hey. It's the only place
that'll hire me.
516
00:19:31,735 --> 00:19:34,260
Hey, you know,
I can help you get your GED.
517
00:19:34,390 --> 00:19:35,870
I thought
you were done teaching.
518
00:19:35,957 --> 00:19:38,481
I think I got room
for one more student.
519
00:19:38,612 --> 00:19:40,875
Who, me?
520
00:19:41,658 --> 00:19:43,356
Hey.
521
00:19:44,487 --> 00:19:46,010
-Hi.
-Hi.
522
00:19:46,141 --> 00:19:48,839
I just want to say I'm...
I'm so sorry about last night.
523
00:19:48,926 --> 00:19:50,928
Like, like, booping you
on the nose
524
00:19:51,059 --> 00:19:52,278
and just thinking
you were a virgin.
525
00:19:52,408 --> 00:19:54,018
I'm-I'm sorry.
526
00:19:54,105 --> 00:19:56,238
-All good. Yeah.
-[chuckles] Okay.
527
00:19:56,325 --> 00:19:58,893
-All right.
-Yeah.
528
00:19:59,937 --> 00:20:00,938
-Okay.
-Sweet. [chuckles]
529
00:20:01,112 --> 00:20:02,462
-[chuckling]
-All right.
530
00:20:02,549 --> 00:20:04,464
♪ ♪
531
00:20:12,341 --> 00:20:14,561
-[music stops]
-Mm.
532
00:20:14,691 --> 00:20:15,866
Just had to be sure.
533
00:20:16,040 --> 00:20:17,825
BOTH:
Mm-hmm.
534
00:20:17,955 --> 00:20:19,305
COLETTE:
Yeah.
535
00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:22,308
Definitely not a virgin.
536
00:20:22,438 --> 00:20:24,310
♪ ♪
537
00:20:25,833 --> 00:20:28,357
-Progress.
-Mm-hmm.
538
00:20:29,489 --> 00:20:30,664
Mm.
539
00:20:37,801 --> 00:20:40,804
Well, you did it, Barbie,
and you look damn good.
540
00:20:40,978 --> 00:20:42,328
Feel great, too.
541
00:20:43,981 --> 00:20:45,374
See you never, Ray.
542
00:20:46,767 --> 00:20:49,117
Already have a successor, I see.
543
00:20:51,337 --> 00:20:53,034
Oh, no.
544
00:20:53,164 --> 00:20:54,383
Beau Young.
545
00:20:54,557 --> 00:20:55,819
Mother Nature!
546
00:20:55,950 --> 00:20:57,604
God!
547
00:21:02,522 --> 00:21:05,568
Captioning sponsored by
CBS
548
00:21:05,699 --> 00:21:08,571
and TOYOTA.
549
00:21:08,702 --> 00:21:11,618
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org
38943
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