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1
00:00:04,556 --> 00:00:07,145
Alrighty, Scofield Dungeon.
2
00:00:07,179 --> 00:00:10,010
Now, we have no idea
what's in here, so, Wizza,
3
00:00:10,044 --> 00:00:12,046
get us any
shielding spells ready.
4
00:00:12,081 --> 00:00:13,599
- Got this.
- I'll lay down
suppressive fire,
5
00:00:13,634 --> 00:00:16,085
pop off a few rounds of
tranquilizer bees.
6
00:00:16,119 --> 00:00:18,432
Bickle, you take the lead on
this one, tank this thing.
7
00:00:18,466 --> 00:00:20,779
All right, finally someone
values my complete disregard
8
00:00:20,813 --> 00:00:22,332
for personal safety.
9
00:00:22,367 --> 00:00:26,681
Just stay alive.
This is all riding on you.
10
00:00:26,716 --> 00:00:28,200
Um, right.
11
00:00:28,235 --> 00:00:29,960
[groans]
Let's kick it!
12
00:00:29,995 --> 00:00:33,619
The righteous fury
of Skull Cracker
will rain down upon you!
13
00:00:33,654 --> 00:00:35,966
Dante!
14
00:00:36,001 --> 00:00:37,934
I need you to help me
clean out the spare room.
15
00:00:37,968 --> 00:00:40,488
Okay, just one second.
I gotta finish this for class.
16
00:00:40,523 --> 00:00:44,630
It's the signing of the
Constitution with dinosaurs.
17
00:00:44,665 --> 00:00:48,117
What say you, Sir Benjamin
Frankli-saurus?
18
00:00:48,151 --> 00:00:51,085
Well I hope I don't get
struck by lightning again.
19
00:00:51,120 --> 00:00:52,638
Hmm.
20
00:00:55,055 --> 00:00:58,334
It's a level 72
Habanero Dragon!
21
00:00:58,368 --> 00:01:00,991
My acid reflux spells are
useless! Bickle, do something!
22
00:01:02,131 --> 00:01:03,442
Dante!
23
00:01:05,134 --> 00:01:07,446
Okay, I can't move that
drum set all by myself.
24
00:01:07,481 --> 00:01:09,034
Not my drums.
25
00:01:09,069 --> 00:01:11,416
Where is Fart School
Confidential going to practice?
26
00:01:11,450 --> 00:01:14,350
- Who?
- My band?
27
00:01:14,384 --> 00:01:17,629
Fart School Confidential,
formally known as Dura-smell.
28
00:01:17,663 --> 00:01:19,355
Your band hasn't
practiced in a year.
29
00:01:19,389 --> 00:01:22,875
We're just taking a break
to pursue solo projects.
30
00:01:22,910 --> 00:01:25,533
Your only solo project is
cleaning out the spare room
31
00:01:25,568 --> 00:01:27,880
so I have a place to do yoga.
32
00:01:27,915 --> 00:01:30,331
Let's go!
33
00:01:30,366 --> 00:01:33,610
I'm on fire!
He set us on fire!
34
00:01:39,133 --> 00:01:42,964
- Dante!
- [sighs]
35
00:01:48,936 --> 00:01:52,112
- This server
is completely borked.
- What's up, Wyatt?
36
00:01:52,146 --> 00:01:55,080
I'm trying to patch
corrupted ISP servers
from Daventry Hills.
37
00:01:55,115 --> 00:01:57,358
It's bad enough having
to deal with game leaks.
38
00:01:57,393 --> 00:01:59,774
We don't have to add leaks
from the whole Internet
to our plate as well.
39
00:01:59,809 --> 00:02:02,122
Completely borked.
40
00:02:02,156 --> 00:02:06,195
- You can't fix it...
- [cans clatter]
41
00:02:06,229 --> 00:02:08,197
just like you can't fix
my broken heart.
42
00:02:08,231 --> 00:02:10,613
You have to stop sleeping here.
We do not have a shower.
43
00:02:10,647 --> 00:02:12,408
- I don't mind.
- We do.
44
00:02:12,442 --> 00:02:14,927
There's no reason to shower.
45
00:02:14,962 --> 00:02:16,929
My supermodel girlfriend
dumped me.
46
00:02:16,964 --> 00:02:19,173
Max, you only dated
the girl for two weeks.
47
00:02:19,208 --> 00:02:20,416
You never even learned
her name.
48
00:02:20,450 --> 00:02:23,936
Our relationship
transcended names.
49
00:02:23,971 --> 00:02:26,422
Those were the best
two weeks of my life.
50
00:02:26,456 --> 00:02:29,666
She said I was vain
and condescending.
51
00:02:29,701 --> 00:02:31,323
I told her,
"You're breaking up
52
00:02:31,358 --> 00:02:33,291
"with the most beautiful man
you'll ever meet,
53
00:02:33,325 --> 00:02:34,533
you 'imbedolt,'"
54
00:02:34,568 --> 00:02:35,672
but it was too late.
55
00:02:38,088 --> 00:02:40,919
[sniffs]
56
00:02:40,953 --> 00:02:42,403
- Dante.
- Wow.
57
00:02:42,438 --> 00:02:44,474
Let's get sandwiches again.
Your treat.
58
00:02:44,509 --> 00:02:46,925
Maybe some fancy ham
will fill the void in my soul.
59
00:02:46,959 --> 00:02:48,651
What's-her-face
was my everything.
60
00:02:48,685 --> 00:02:50,515
Now I have nothing,
61
00:02:50,549 --> 00:02:54,415
nothing but my
multi-billion-dollar
software company,
62
00:02:54,450 --> 00:02:57,107
my mansion, this plane,
63
00:02:57,142 --> 00:02:59,489
that dinosaur, these things.
64
00:02:59,524 --> 00:03:03,044
- [gags]
- Boards and gadgets.
65
00:03:03,079 --> 00:03:05,461
I am fearing for my safety
and my sanity.
66
00:03:05,495 --> 00:03:06,910
Hey, what happened
to you last night?
67
00:03:06,945 --> 00:03:08,257
You just stood there
while that dragon
68
00:03:08,291 --> 00:03:09,568
turned us into chimichangas.
69
00:03:09,603 --> 00:03:13,227
- Yeah.
- My mom was going psycho.
70
00:03:13,262 --> 00:03:15,471
She wants me to move my band's
entire practice space
71
00:03:15,505 --> 00:03:18,922
so she put in, like,
a Zen garden or something.
72
00:03:18,957 --> 00:03:21,270
I thought Fart School
Confidential had broken up.
73
00:03:21,304 --> 00:03:23,064
The band is just on hiatus
74
00:03:23,099 --> 00:03:25,066
until I can find replacements
for everyone who quit.
75
00:03:25,101 --> 00:03:26,654
Ever since my dad left,
76
00:03:26,689 --> 00:03:28,725
my mom has rearranged
the house on a weekly basis.
77
00:03:28,760 --> 00:03:30,831
- First it was scrap booking--
- [metal clattering]
78
00:03:30,865 --> 00:03:32,107
then salsa dancing,
79
00:03:32,142 --> 00:03:33,592
Bonsai trees, bird watching.
80
00:03:33,627 --> 00:03:35,145
Ha!
81
00:03:40,668 --> 00:03:42,463
Maybe that's
what I need to do--
82
00:03:42,498 --> 00:03:44,224
rearrange my life.
83
00:03:44,258 --> 00:03:48,228
I can't take being alone
in my gigantic palatial estate.
84
00:03:48,262 --> 00:03:50,644
I should sell it
and move in here,
85
00:03:50,678 --> 00:03:54,303
be miserable with you guys.
86
00:03:54,337 --> 00:03:56,443
- Ugh.
- That is a great idea
87
00:03:56,477 --> 00:03:57,685
that we can't do
anything about
88
00:03:57,720 --> 00:04:00,032
because you own the warehouse.
89
00:04:00,067 --> 00:04:01,655
All right, listen.
90
00:04:01,689 --> 00:04:04,209
I've obviously
never been dumped, but--
91
00:04:04,244 --> 00:04:06,107
Obviously, neither have I,
92
00:04:06,142 --> 00:04:08,006
because I've never
had a girlfriend.
93
00:04:08,039 --> 00:04:10,422
- Yeah.
- The never-been-dumped club.
94
00:04:10,457 --> 00:04:12,355
What?
95
00:04:12,390 --> 00:04:14,426
Anyway, I've heard
96
00:04:14,461 --> 00:04:16,359
that the best medicine
for a broken heart
97
00:04:16,394 --> 00:04:18,534
is just get out there
and start dating again.
98
00:04:18,568 --> 00:04:21,330
It was on a card I gave
to a girl I broke up with.
99
00:04:21,364 --> 00:04:22,710
That won't be a problem.
100
00:04:22,745 --> 00:04:25,817
Look at me. I'm perfect.
101
00:04:25,851 --> 00:04:27,957
[buzzing]
102
00:04:27,991 --> 00:04:29,821
I think we're going
to need some help.
103
00:04:34,032 --> 00:04:36,172
In your current state,
I think Internet dating
104
00:04:36,206 --> 00:04:37,725
would be your best bet.
105
00:04:37,760 --> 00:04:39,796
Let's sign you up
for Hopelessly Single.
106
00:04:39,831 --> 00:04:42,143
If you don't find a date
within the first 30 days,
107
00:04:42,178 --> 00:04:43,731
they send you a cat.
108
00:04:43,766 --> 00:04:45,146
Okay, name.
109
00:04:45,181 --> 00:04:46,389
Max Ross.
110
00:04:46,424 --> 00:04:49,323
"People describe
my looks as..."
111
00:04:49,358 --> 00:04:51,463
A miracle of genetics.
112
00:04:51,498 --> 00:04:53,810
A modern-day Adonis.
113
00:04:53,845 --> 00:04:55,329
You can grate cheese on my--
114
00:04:55,364 --> 00:04:57,780
All right, I'm going
to put athletic.
115
00:04:57,814 --> 00:05:00,817
- "My best qualities are..."
- Everything.
116
00:05:00,852 --> 00:05:04,062
I'm so brilliant that the
government's trying to get
inside my brain.
117
00:05:04,096 --> 00:05:05,339
[whispering]
But I keep them out
118
00:05:05,374 --> 00:05:07,859
with my tinfoil-lined hats.
Shhh...
119
00:05:07,893 --> 00:05:11,690
I am confident and have
an avid interest in
alternative medicine.
120
00:05:11,725 --> 00:05:14,555
"Uh, I like to spend
my free time..."
121
00:05:14,590 --> 00:05:17,351
Locked inside my mansion
counting my money
122
00:05:17,386 --> 00:05:19,249
and working on my zombie
apocalypse plan,
123
00:05:19,284 --> 00:05:22,425
which is to stay locked
inside my mansion.
124
00:05:22,460 --> 00:05:25,186
Enjoying the wonders
of the world and having fun
125
00:05:25,221 --> 00:05:27,430
with other positive-thinking
human beings.
126
00:05:27,465 --> 00:05:28,397
Write what I say.
127
00:05:28,431 --> 00:05:29,812
You're saying craziness.
128
00:05:31,710 --> 00:05:33,091
"My hobbies include..."
129
00:05:33,125 --> 00:05:34,334
Video games.
130
00:05:34,368 --> 00:05:36,370
Rock climbing.
131
00:05:36,405 --> 00:05:39,166
Okay. All we need now
is a profile pic.
132
00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:41,168
Smile!
133
00:05:43,066 --> 00:05:44,758
Well, if women aren't
interested,
134
00:05:44,792 --> 00:05:46,691
the police might be.
135
00:06:02,672 --> 00:06:06,400
Finito.
136
00:06:06,435 --> 00:06:12,095
Now sit, stay, and the ladies
will be flocking in no time.
137
00:06:15,409 --> 00:06:18,343
[snoring]
138
00:06:43,333 --> 00:06:47,683
Hey, those pants chafe,
so the joke's on you buddy.
139
00:06:49,478 --> 00:06:52,757
Man, my mom
is still on my back.
140
00:06:52,791 --> 00:06:55,345
Now she wants me to disassemble
my clothes sphere.
141
00:06:55,380 --> 00:06:57,278
Clothes sphere?
142
00:06:57,313 --> 00:06:59,764
All my dirty clothes
have sort of congealed
143
00:06:59,798 --> 00:07:01,593
into this giant sphere of
fabric.
144
00:07:01,628 --> 00:07:03,388
Why don't you
just clean it up?
145
00:07:03,423 --> 00:07:05,804
Can it be that bad
if it'll make your mom happy?
146
00:07:05,839 --> 00:07:09,152
If I start making her happy,
she'll start expecting things.
147
00:07:09,187 --> 00:07:10,706
I cannot deal with
that kind of pressure.
148
00:07:10,740 --> 00:07:14,434
Hello, hello, hello!
149
00:07:14,468 --> 00:07:15,883
Dante, Lyle, Wyatt.
150
00:07:15,918 --> 00:07:18,092
What's with all
this negative energy?
151
00:07:18,127 --> 00:07:19,922
We thought you
still might be upset
152
00:07:19,956 --> 00:07:21,371
about your life being over
153
00:07:21,406 --> 00:07:23,097
because your girlfriend
dumped you.
154
00:07:23,132 --> 00:07:26,100
Life's too short to be bummed.
155
00:07:27,550 --> 00:07:28,931
Are you feeling okay?
156
00:07:28,965 --> 00:07:30,726
I have never felt better.
157
00:07:30,760 --> 00:07:32,555
I'm happy, healthy,
158
00:07:32,590 --> 00:07:34,281
and thanks
to Hopelessly Single,
159
00:07:34,315 --> 00:07:35,593
I even have a date tonight.
160
00:07:35,627 --> 00:07:37,733
Wow.
161
00:07:37,767 --> 00:07:40,011
Flaxseed anyone?
162
00:07:42,531 --> 00:07:44,740
Hey, I read Daventry Sports
163
00:07:44,774 --> 00:07:46,638
has a sweet new
rock climbing wall.
164
00:07:46,673 --> 00:07:49,192
Let's have an IRL
adventure for a change.
165
00:07:49,227 --> 00:07:50,262
Let's all go rock climbing.
166
00:07:50,297 --> 00:07:51,988
♪ [rock]
167
00:07:59,893 --> 00:08:02,309
On belay, my good man.
168
00:08:02,343 --> 00:08:04,863
Yo, Max is more than Max.
169
00:08:04,898 --> 00:08:07,038
- He's maxed out.
- Yeah.
170
00:08:07,072 --> 00:08:08,626
Are we done?
171
00:08:08,660 --> 00:08:11,387
If I jump, will that guy
take me all the way down?
172
00:08:14,632 --> 00:08:18,152
Nothin' but the best for
my numero uno compadres.
173
00:08:18,187 --> 00:08:19,602
Wear the helmets home
if you want.
174
00:08:19,637 --> 00:08:21,431
They're yours to keep.
175
00:08:21,466 --> 00:08:24,158
Sweet!
I'm totally sleeping in this.
176
00:08:24,193 --> 00:08:27,265
Someone's taking the railing
off their bed tonight.
177
00:08:27,299 --> 00:08:30,924
[laughter]
178
00:08:30,958 --> 00:08:32,650
Okay, well, nobody
answered my question,
179
00:08:32,683 --> 00:08:35,515
so I'm just gonna go for it.
180
00:08:37,724 --> 00:08:41,141
We're not done with the fun.
Right, guys?
181
00:08:41,175 --> 00:08:44,075
I had a stack of pizzas
delivered to the top
of this wall,
182
00:08:44,109 --> 00:08:46,767
so let's climb.
183
00:08:46,802 --> 00:08:49,598
Pizza on top of the wall?
That's classy.
184
00:08:49,632 --> 00:08:52,186
Now, there's no doubt that
eating on a wall is classy,
185
00:08:52,221 --> 00:08:54,188
but don't you think
Max is acting a little--
186
00:08:54,223 --> 00:08:55,983
- Awesome?
- Brodacious?
187
00:08:56,018 --> 00:08:58,192
No, and not a word,
no matter how often you use it.
188
00:08:58,227 --> 00:09:00,022
I was going to say weird.
189
00:09:00,056 --> 00:09:01,851
Hey, if him buying us stuff
and acting nice is weird,
190
00:09:01,886 --> 00:09:04,889
then I'm all for weird.
191
00:09:04,923 --> 00:09:08,409
Guys, this pineapple
and ham is awesome.
192
00:09:08,444 --> 00:09:09,583
Yes!
193
00:09:13,035 --> 00:09:14,830
Woo-hoo!
194
00:09:16,417 --> 00:09:17,764
[doorbell rings]
195
00:09:17,798 --> 00:09:19,697
Could you please
get that, sweetie?
196
00:09:19,731 --> 00:09:21,699
Thank you.
197
00:09:21,733 --> 00:09:23,873
Sweetie?
198
00:09:25,392 --> 00:09:27,325
Good evening, Dante.
199
00:09:27,359 --> 00:09:29,430
Max. What's up?
200
00:09:29,465 --> 00:09:32,261
Did you forget your
ropey-clampy thing?
201
00:09:32,295 --> 00:09:34,884
It's called a carabiner.
Oh, no.
202
00:09:34,919 --> 00:09:37,577
I'm here for my date.
203
00:09:37,611 --> 00:09:40,200
Max, I'm very flattered,
204
00:09:40,234 --> 00:09:43,721
but how do I say this
without hurting you?
205
00:09:43,755 --> 00:09:45,619
I like you as a friend.
206
00:09:45,654 --> 00:09:48,518
Hi, Max.
207
00:09:48,553 --> 00:09:50,313
- Nice clothes.
- Thank you.
208
00:09:50,348 --> 00:09:51,591
Flowers?
209
00:09:51,625 --> 00:09:53,627
Did someone die?
210
00:09:53,662 --> 00:09:55,629
We're going on a date.
211
00:09:55,664 --> 00:09:56,837
That's way worse!
212
00:09:56,872 --> 00:09:58,356
You, in.
213
00:09:58,390 --> 00:09:59,875
You, out.
214
00:10:03,050 --> 00:10:06,985
You're going
on a date with Max Ross?
215
00:10:07,020 --> 00:10:10,126
He is an eccentric billionaire
who dates supermodels--
216
00:10:10,161 --> 00:10:12,025
- [gasps]
- ...not ladies who
live in this house
217
00:10:12,059 --> 00:10:13,682
and yell at me
to clean my room.
218
00:10:13,716 --> 00:10:15,545
Well, I am a person, too.
219
00:10:15,580 --> 00:10:19,239
And I like to go
out and have fun.
220
00:10:19,273 --> 00:10:22,035
And Max is
a very charming man.
221
00:10:22,069 --> 00:10:23,588
You two have nothing in common.
222
00:10:23,623 --> 00:10:26,729
He created the game
that you never want me to play.
223
00:10:26,764 --> 00:10:29,180
Well, according to
Hopelessly Single,
224
00:10:29,214 --> 00:10:31,700
we are a 110% match.
225
00:10:31,734 --> 00:10:34,081
Let me tell you
something, Barbara.
226
00:10:34,116 --> 00:10:36,497
I'm rockin' a D+ in math,
227
00:10:36,532 --> 00:10:39,569
so I'm pretty confident
that's impossible.
228
00:10:39,604 --> 00:10:40,225
[knocks on door]
229
00:10:40,260 --> 00:10:41,848
Oh. Jiggle it.
230
00:10:41,882 --> 00:10:44,091
- Jiggle.
- There we go.
231
00:10:46,749 --> 00:10:48,958
Good evening, Barbara.
232
00:10:48,993 --> 00:10:52,962
Wow, thank you.
Those are nice.
233
00:10:52,997 --> 00:10:54,861
[gasps]
Ginkgo biloba.
234
00:10:54,895 --> 00:10:56,483
It's my favorite...
235
00:10:56,517 --> 00:10:58,381
as I recall.
[chuckles]
236
00:11:01,695 --> 00:11:03,732
Have a good night.
237
00:11:03,766 --> 00:11:04,974
Wow!
238
00:11:05,009 --> 00:11:06,804
- This is yours?
- Yeah.
239
00:11:06,838 --> 00:11:08,045
[door closes]
240
00:11:08,080 --> 00:11:10,980
[giggles]
Bye.
241
00:11:15,778 --> 00:11:17,711
Max and your mom?
242
00:11:17,746 --> 00:11:19,126
It's crazy.
243
00:11:19,161 --> 00:11:21,370
And this level 40
Statling Ogre is crazy.
244
00:11:21,404 --> 00:11:22,958
Come on, stay frosty, guys.
245
00:11:22,992 --> 00:11:24,442
Stay frosty?
246
00:11:24,476 --> 00:11:26,513
My world is imploding, Wyatt.
247
00:11:26,547 --> 00:11:29,067
Hey, you could wind up the
stepson of a billionaire.
248
00:11:29,102 --> 00:11:30,759
You could bathe in money,
249
00:11:30,793 --> 00:11:33,175
if you bathe.
250
00:11:33,209 --> 00:11:35,177
So Max is charming now,
251
00:11:35,211 --> 00:11:37,973
but 24 hours ago he was
the most annoying person alive?
252
00:11:38,007 --> 00:11:40,216
Something strange is going on.
253
00:11:40,251 --> 00:11:42,011
It's like a comic book
crossover.
254
00:11:42,046 --> 00:11:47,741
Momzilla and Max-a-tron united
to destroy one innocent boy.
255
00:11:47,776 --> 00:11:49,709
This ends tonight.
256
00:11:57,095 --> 00:11:58,752
Aww.
257
00:11:58,787 --> 00:12:01,237
[gasps]
258
00:12:01,272 --> 00:12:02,894
Do you know how late it is?
259
00:12:02,929 --> 00:12:04,896
I called you three times.
Why didn't you pick up?
260
00:12:04,931 --> 00:12:06,415
[loud guitar]
261
00:12:06,449 --> 00:12:08,762
Oh! Um...
262
00:12:08,797 --> 00:12:11,592
I'm sorry. I was just...
263
00:12:11,627 --> 00:12:14,285
I was having such
a wonderful time.
264
00:12:14,319 --> 00:12:16,149
We went for dinner
265
00:12:16,183 --> 00:12:17,529
and rock climbing.
266
00:12:17,564 --> 00:12:19,842
- Rock climbing?
- Yeah.
267
00:12:19,877 --> 00:12:22,776
Look, I don't like you hanging
out with this Max character.
268
00:12:22,811 --> 00:12:24,985
- He's a bad influence.
- Oh.
269
00:12:25,020 --> 00:12:26,538
Well, you're not my father,
270
00:12:26,573 --> 00:12:28,057
so you can't
tell me what to do.
271
00:12:28,092 --> 00:12:30,163
Uh, I know.
You're my mother.
272
00:12:30,197 --> 00:12:32,441
And if you keep dating Max,
273
00:12:32,475 --> 00:12:35,340
then I'm not moving my drums
out of the spare room.
274
00:12:35,375 --> 00:12:37,757
That's fine.
275
00:12:37,791 --> 00:12:39,448
And I'm keeping
my clothes sphere.
276
00:12:39,482 --> 00:12:42,382
- Suit yourself.
- I will.
277
00:12:42,416 --> 00:12:45,937
I will suit myself in armor,
278
00:12:45,972 --> 00:12:48,733
and I'll host a jousting
tournament in the living room.
279
00:12:48,768 --> 00:12:51,287
Well, that's nice, honey.
280
00:12:59,295 --> 00:13:01,919
But last night, the thought
of Max and your mom together
281
00:13:01,953 --> 00:13:04,507
made you want to vomit up
your spleen.
282
00:13:04,542 --> 00:13:06,233
Turns out
when my mom is happy,
283
00:13:06,268 --> 00:13:08,788
she completely forgets
to make my life miserable.
284
00:13:08,822 --> 00:13:12,067
It's awesome.
He's really changed, by the way.
285
00:13:12,101 --> 00:13:13,758
He's into all
this new stuff like--
286
00:13:13,793 --> 00:13:15,415
Exploring the wonders of the
world while having fun
287
00:13:15,449 --> 00:13:18,280
with other positive-thinking
human beings?
288
00:13:18,314 --> 00:13:19,971
Boom. Exactly.
289
00:13:20,006 --> 00:13:21,490
Wait.
290
00:13:21,524 --> 00:13:22,767
That sounds familiar.
291
00:13:22,802 --> 00:13:24,976
Max's new persona
292
00:13:25,011 --> 00:13:28,359
is word-for-word the profile
Angie created online.
293
00:13:28,393 --> 00:13:31,051
And look, the pic is gone.
294
00:13:31,086 --> 00:13:34,537
I think her fake Max
leaked out.
295
00:13:34,572 --> 00:13:35,780
That's not good.
296
00:13:36,608 --> 00:13:38,956
Angie's fake version
of Max leaked out.
297
00:13:38,990 --> 00:13:41,303
That explains his obsession
with rock climbing.
298
00:13:41,337 --> 00:13:42,787
It's the only hobby
that she gave him.
299
00:13:42,822 --> 00:13:44,962
She? You guys were there, too.
300
00:13:44,996 --> 00:13:46,584
Don't put this all on me.
301
00:13:46,618 --> 00:13:48,068
It was those corrupted servers.
Great.
302
00:13:48,103 --> 00:13:50,105
Now we have Internet leaks
to deal with too.
303
00:13:50,139 --> 00:13:52,107
We need to go to Max's.
304
00:13:52,141 --> 00:13:55,006
If he's a leak,
we got to take care of it.
305
00:13:55,041 --> 00:13:56,318
Or...
306
00:13:56,352 --> 00:13:58,009
Or we don't.
307
00:13:58,044 --> 00:13:59,459
Let's compare, shall we?
308
00:13:59,493 --> 00:14:02,082
New Max, fun and outgoing.
309
00:14:02,117 --> 00:14:04,291
Old Max, weird hermit
who talks to money.
310
00:14:04,326 --> 00:14:06,086
He's a leak, Dante.
311
00:14:06,121 --> 00:14:07,916
- He's not real.
- So?
312
00:14:07,950 --> 00:14:10,263
He makes my mom happy,
all right?
313
00:14:10,297 --> 00:14:13,714
That makes me happy.
Can't we all live
314
00:14:13,749 --> 00:14:15,475
with a little fake person
from the Internet
315
00:14:15,509 --> 00:14:18,858
co-existing in our reality?
316
00:14:18,892 --> 00:14:20,549
- No!
- No!
317
00:14:20,583 --> 00:14:22,896
Reason number 207
we should keep Internet Max.
318
00:14:22,931 --> 00:14:24,760
Internet Max buys us pizza.
319
00:14:24,794 --> 00:14:27,038
Real Max threw a full can
of soda at my head.
320
00:14:27,073 --> 00:14:28,764
Let's split up.
321
00:14:28,798 --> 00:14:32,216
We'll check inside.
Dante, you get the perimeter.
322
00:14:43,986 --> 00:14:45,781
Max?
323
00:14:45,815 --> 00:14:47,921
Are you real
or from the Internet?
324
00:14:47,956 --> 00:14:49,405
It's hard to say.
325
00:14:49,440 --> 00:14:50,786
What's your stance
on rock climbing?
326
00:14:50,820 --> 00:14:54,721
I hate it.
327
00:14:54,755 --> 00:14:56,378
What are you doing?
328
00:14:56,412 --> 00:15:00,658
My digital doppelganger
locked me in here.
329
00:15:00,692 --> 00:15:02,625
It's not locked.
330
00:15:02,660 --> 00:15:04,144
Oh.
Well, what do you know?
331
00:15:04,179 --> 00:15:06,457
Dante!
332
00:15:06,491 --> 00:15:07,941
Hey, guys.
Did you find anything?
333
00:15:07,976 --> 00:15:09,701
- Nothing.
- Anything out here?
334
00:15:09,736 --> 00:15:13,119
Nothing in here.
Just some rusty old tool.
335
00:15:13,153 --> 00:15:14,948
Well, we tried, you know.
We should just go,
336
00:15:14,983 --> 00:15:17,295
get on with our lives.
I'm good.
337
00:15:17,330 --> 00:15:19,953
Well, he wasn't anywhere near
Max's frozen yogurt machine.
338
00:15:19,988 --> 00:15:21,990
Guys.
You've shown up at my mansion
339
00:15:22,024 --> 00:15:24,475
completely uninvited.
What a wonderful surprise.
340
00:15:24,509 --> 00:15:26,270
I have some great news.
341
00:15:26,304 --> 00:15:29,307
I've decided to shut down
Conqueror of All Worlds.
342
00:15:29,342 --> 00:15:31,965
I think people are
spending too much time
conquering all worlds,
343
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:34,381
and not enough time
conquering this world.
344
00:15:34,416 --> 00:15:36,211
I thought of that on the wall.
What do you think?
345
00:15:36,245 --> 00:15:39,041
That's the worst idea ever.
He's gotta go.
346
00:15:39,076 --> 00:15:40,767
[gasps]
What's the matter, Dante?
347
00:15:40,801 --> 00:15:42,182
Don't you want people to live
life to the fullest?
348
00:15:42,217 --> 00:15:44,874
[straining] Yes.
Living would be ideal.
349
00:15:46,393 --> 00:15:48,326
Shutting down the game
is only the beginning.
350
00:15:48,361 --> 00:15:50,880
I'm leveling your HQ
and turning it into
a cranberry bog
351
00:15:50,915 --> 00:15:54,401
because cranberries are full of
anti-oxidants, and you're not.
352
00:15:54,436 --> 00:15:56,369
Hey, I hate to cut
this hang sesh short,
353
00:15:56,403 --> 00:15:58,164
but I have a date
with Barbara.
354
00:15:58,198 --> 00:15:59,165
Five it out.
355
00:15:59,199 --> 00:16:00,821
No? Nothing?
356
00:16:03,859 --> 00:16:06,275
Okay, let's split up and keep
looking for real Max.
357
00:16:06,310 --> 00:16:09,278
I'll take the utility room
again.
358
00:16:09,313 --> 00:16:11,004
Oh, Max, who I must've not seen
359
00:16:11,039 --> 00:16:13,110
when I was carefully checking
the utility room.
360
00:16:13,144 --> 00:16:16,492
Nobody messes with
my primary revenue stream
361
00:16:16,527 --> 00:16:17,977
or my yogurt machine.
362
00:16:20,600 --> 00:16:23,637
We gotta stop me.
You go do that.
363
00:16:23,672 --> 00:16:26,019
I'll stay here and make sure
that the me that you stop
364
00:16:26,054 --> 00:16:27,814
is the right me,
which is not me.
365
00:16:27,848 --> 00:16:30,748
Oh.
[chuckles]
366
00:16:30,782 --> 00:16:33,095
This is so romantic, Maxwell.
367
00:16:33,130 --> 00:16:35,339
This restaurant is exquisite.
368
00:16:40,585 --> 00:16:42,242
I would love to throw
a grappling hook
369
00:16:42,277 --> 00:16:44,555
over that fireplace.
370
00:16:44,589 --> 00:16:46,833
[laughs]
Really?
371
00:17:04,091 --> 00:17:06,749
I see them.
372
00:17:07,888 --> 00:17:09,856
Come over here. Come on!
373
00:17:31,602 --> 00:17:34,536
Okay, some people saw me but not
the one's we're worried about.
374
00:17:34,570 --> 00:17:36,089
Listen up, my theory is,
375
00:17:36,124 --> 00:17:37,711
if we alter Max's
dating profile online,
376
00:17:37,746 --> 00:17:40,231
it should in turn change
the leaked version of Max.
377
00:17:40,266 --> 00:17:42,785
Angie, you made Max
the coolest date in the world.
378
00:17:42,820 --> 00:17:45,098
Now you get to make him
the worst.
379
00:17:45,133 --> 00:17:48,170
Gee, wherever will I
get ideas for that?
380
00:17:48,205 --> 00:17:49,930
No clue, but do it.
381
00:17:49,965 --> 00:17:51,760
My mom will dump him,
and we'll delete him.
382
00:17:51,794 --> 00:17:53,520
[laughter]
383
00:17:53,555 --> 00:17:57,628
That's why I named
the kitten Señor Muffin Face.
384
00:17:57,662 --> 00:17:59,768
That is an amazing cat story.
385
00:17:59,802 --> 00:18:01,597
- Yeah.
- Ha.
386
00:18:01,632 --> 00:18:05,325
Okay. Let's bring back
the Max Ross self-obsession.
387
00:18:05,360 --> 00:18:07,120
My interests include me,
388
00:18:07,155 --> 00:18:09,950
my billions of dollars,
and me.
389
00:18:13,816 --> 00:18:15,301
- I did his whiskers, too.
- You did?
390
00:18:15,335 --> 00:18:16,785
Yeah, I used Sharpies,
391
00:18:16,819 --> 00:18:18,545
and I did them the color
of the Mexican flag.
392
00:18:18,580 --> 00:18:20,961
I don't think he liked it,
though. Rowr!
393
00:18:20,996 --> 00:18:23,619
It's funny,
your cat story reminds me
394
00:18:23,654 --> 00:18:25,207
of how I'm a rich
billionaire genius
395
00:18:25,242 --> 00:18:27,899
who doesn't care.
396
00:18:27,934 --> 00:18:30,661
Excuse me, but it was
a very sad day
397
00:18:30,695 --> 00:18:32,870
when Señor Muffin Face
ran away.
398
00:18:32,904 --> 00:18:35,148
He probably left because you
told him a boring story
399
00:18:35,183 --> 00:18:37,046
about some dumb cat.
400
00:18:37,081 --> 00:18:38,393
Yes! Yes!
401
00:18:38,427 --> 00:18:41,327
Okay, now make him
a super slob.
402
00:18:41,361 --> 00:18:42,742
Think, Dante.
403
00:18:42,776 --> 00:18:45,227
I have a moral opposition
to silverware.
404
00:18:49,266 --> 00:18:51,785
Whoo!
405
00:18:51,820 --> 00:18:53,166
[growling]
406
00:18:53,201 --> 00:18:54,961
It's working. More, more.
407
00:18:54,995 --> 00:18:56,963
Shirts make me itch
uncontrollably,
408
00:18:56,997 --> 00:18:59,172
the government put bees
inside my brain,
409
00:18:59,207 --> 00:19:00,898
and I'm afraid
of tablecloths!
410
00:19:03,418 --> 00:19:04,419
[yelps]
411
00:19:06,248 --> 00:19:08,561
[screams]
412
00:19:08,595 --> 00:19:09,872
[loud crash]
413
00:19:15,982 --> 00:19:17,294
There's a beehive
inside my mind.
414
00:19:17,328 --> 00:19:18,502
There's bees in his head.
415
00:19:18,536 --> 00:19:20,400
He thinks there's bees
in his head.
416
00:19:20,435 --> 00:19:22,506
They're harvesting my brain
nectar for the Pentagon.
417
00:19:22,540 --> 00:19:23,783
Get out of my mind!
418
00:19:23,817 --> 00:19:25,647
What are you doing?
419
00:19:25,681 --> 00:19:29,202
I'm sorry, I don't think that
this is going to work out.
420
00:19:29,237 --> 00:19:31,687
And it-- No, it's not me.
It's totally you.
421
00:19:31,722 --> 00:19:33,586
You're a lunatic.
422
00:19:33,620 --> 00:19:36,071
Wait!
They're stinging my dreams!
423
00:19:36,105 --> 00:19:39,902
- And I hate rock climbing.
- Come back.
424
00:19:46,150 --> 00:19:48,463
You! You did this to me!
425
00:19:48,497 --> 00:19:50,672
Relationship status over.
426
00:19:54,917 --> 00:19:56,195
[chuckles]
427
00:19:58,542 --> 00:19:59,853
Oh, that's great.
428
00:20:01,717 --> 00:20:04,030
What's wrong?
429
00:20:04,064 --> 00:20:06,170
I don't know.
430
00:20:06,205 --> 00:20:08,552
My mom had actually found
someone she liked,
431
00:20:08,586 --> 00:20:11,762
and I just deleted him
from existence.
432
00:20:11,796 --> 00:20:13,419
He made her happy.
433
00:20:13,453 --> 00:20:15,352
He wasn't real.
434
00:20:19,183 --> 00:20:23,705
He also did try to choke Dante
and I on several occasions.
435
00:20:23,739 --> 00:20:25,396
Anyone notice that?
436
00:20:25,431 --> 00:20:27,571
No?
437
00:20:27,605 --> 00:20:28,951
Okay.
438
00:20:30,332 --> 00:20:32,231
Dante!
439
00:20:32,265 --> 00:20:34,785
Oh!
440
00:20:34,819 --> 00:20:36,580
How was your date?
441
00:20:36,614 --> 00:20:38,961
I don't think we're going
to go on a third date.
442
00:20:38,996 --> 00:20:43,518
Max's mood swings
are a little... extreme.
443
00:20:46,348 --> 00:20:47,763
I'm sorry, Mom.
444
00:20:47,798 --> 00:20:49,455
You deserve someone
better than that.
445
00:20:49,489 --> 00:20:53,148
Eh, it's probably
for the best.
446
00:20:54,460 --> 00:20:55,737
Oh.
447
00:20:57,911 --> 00:20:58,981
[gasps]
448
00:21:03,054 --> 00:21:05,194
- ♪ [sitar]
-[gasps]
449
00:21:05,229 --> 00:21:08,301
Nice job in here. You--
450
00:21:08,336 --> 00:21:10,752
Wait, you even got rid
of your T-shirt ball.
451
00:21:10,786 --> 00:21:12,581
Clothes sphere.
452
00:21:12,616 --> 00:21:14,100
Clothes sphere.
453
00:21:14,134 --> 00:21:18,415
It's all ready for yoga-ing.
454
00:21:18,449 --> 00:21:21,072
Thanks, Dante.
455
00:21:21,107 --> 00:21:23,489
Really.
456
00:21:23,523 --> 00:21:25,214
But tomorrow,
457
00:21:25,249 --> 00:21:28,563
we are cleaning out the shed
to make a greenhouse,
458
00:21:28,597 --> 00:21:29,840
so rest up.
459
00:21:52,138 --> 00:21:54,313
I'll never let her
get you, old chum.
30510
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