Original subtitles

I really know what you're doing there, Devin.

Derek. Oh, really?

It's my cousin's name.

Oh.

Anyway, that was a lot of fun, man.

Yeah, man.

We should do this again sometime.

Or are you not really into that sort of thing?

What sort of thing?

Seeing people more than once?

No, I am.

I have a boyfriend, actually, for like over a year, so I've definitely seen him

more than once.

And he's okay with it?

I mean, okay, that's a strong word.

No, it's not. It's fine. Don't worry about it. But I actually, I gotta run.

It's your place.

Right.

Oh, Charlie, I am not still getting

ready. Lucas is gonna pick me up and we'll be there in like two seconds.

Can you hurry up? Mom said that she needs some gay energy in the house right

now. Charlie, tell your brother we're putting the flag up.

She did not. What are you wearing?

No, you cannot take photos in the house.

Get something from my closet.

Yes, she is putting up the pride flag right now.

Will you tell her it doesn't count if she takes it down after I leave?

Fuck. She's trying.

Uh, Lucas is here. I gotta go.

Okay, so remember the plan?

We're the happiest couple the world has ever seen.

That sounded sarcastic.

Everything all right?

Uh, I just can't wait to see your parents.

Right.

Damn, Matt and Johnny got engaged.

Mm -hmm.

That's crazy.

I mean, we are kind of at that age, so... It's so funny when the gays try

keep up with the straights. Like, give it two weeks and they're going to have a

golden doodle.

What's the problem with a monogamous lifestyle?

I mean, just because you're gay doesn't mean you have to be a whore.

I'm not a whore, but not every relationship has to be like vanilla and

cutter. I don't know. I want that.

Well, what if I don't?

Well, then... Well, then what?

You know what?

This whole open thing isn't working for me anymore.

Look, this fall, I saw all of these loving, happy families taking their kids

the pumpkin patch and finding the perfect pumpkin. And as much as I would

to see us in their shoes, I don't think it'll happen like this.

Why are we watching Family Today? Ben, come on. Okay, I'm sorry, but like...

I'm not really dreaming of matching plaid family portraits right now.

And I don't know that I ever will.

I mean, what am I supposed to say to my parents, who would have been married for

eight years already at my age? Like, sorry, Mom and Dad, I came out too late

life, and now I feel like I'm behind in trying to catch up.

You underestimate them.

Yeah, well, it's easier to make them happy.

Can we just discuss later?

Discuss later?

email. Did you really just storm away from me? What even are we, Finn?

You're my boyfriend. We are together. I don't know. God, does everything need a

label? After all this time? Yeah.

You say you love me. I do love you, but I said I didn't want to talk about this

right now. You never want to talk about it, and I'm sick of wasting time.

How are you not sick of it? Sick of what?

Putting up a front all the time.

What would you like me to do instead?

Be honest.

With yourself, or at least with me.

Or we can break up.

Hey!

I thought I heard you too.

Slay. Harley, you look amazing.

Aw, you too.

And how's my favorite twink?

You're clearly not a twink.

Am I?

Quintet didn't feed.

Well, let's go inside and celebrate, shall we?

Oh! What are we celebrating?

Finn. You didn't tell him?

Tell him what?

About me getting 100K.

That's what we're here for?

Obviously.

And you guys, I don't mean to lick my own clit or anything, but the gays love

me. Like a pest.

As they should.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, baby.

Babe, you're looking fine as hell.

Oh, tricky poo.

You too, Linda.

Oh, stop it. You really think so?

That's it?

Milk alert.

Ricky, absolutely not.

What's milk?

This is ridiculous.

What is she famous for?

She posed Get Ready With Me's.

Get ready with me celebrating my 100 ,000th... Did

you really mean what you said earlier? Thought you didn't want to talk about

Well, you always play these games. Oh, I'm the one who plays games? Um, yeah.

That's complete bullshit.

It's coming. We're happy, remember?

What are you two lovebirds talking about?

Oh, the games and stuff.

That's a great idea. Hey, hun? Yeah, Chuck? The boys want to play a game.

Dad, you made us get rid of all the games because they took up too much room

storage. Oh, that's right. I needed room for Marcella.

His Vespa. It got too cold in the garage.

We've got some conversation cards. We use them during book club when things

awkward.

So, uh, how do we play?

I think you just ask a question to whoever the arrow lands on.

Sounds kind of boring, no?

Oh, come on now, it'll be fun.

You really get to know the people you're playing with.

I'm so happy for you two.

We were beginning to think Finn would end up alone.

Right, son?

Yeah.

That's sweet. Supportive. Well, there's no way that could happen.

Yeah, um, every day I wake up and think how lucky I am to have such a

thoughtful, devoted, and selfless man in my life.

Aww.

Finny.

Alright. Good part.

What is your favorite book to read and why?

Oh.

I'll pick a different one.

If you could live anywhere, where would you want to live?

Maybe by the beach with your lovely daughter.

Or two kids and a cute little golden doodle to walk during sunset.

Oh.

Who's next?

Oh, my turn. John?

Or sir.

How do you feel about your relationship with your family?

I mean, it's great.

But I do wish we were a little bit closer.

Especially you, Finny.

Wait, really?

Of course.

You never keep us updated on what...

you and Lucas are up to.

Your mom and I are cool, Finn.

We would love to hear more about your LGBT lifestyle.

My turn.

Finn, where do you see yourself in five years?

I can't wait to hear this one.

Probably settle down with Lucas and maybe even married. Who knows? Five

a long time.

My fans would love a gay wedding.

Oh my gosh. That's beautiful.

Yeah, but all we really want is to take our kids to the pumpkin patch every

year. Right, babe?

Are you fucking kidding me?

Yo.

Lucas, I... I don't want to lie to your parents anymore.

What's going on?

Yeah, Finn.

What's going on?

You know what? My guess is that it won't end up like that.

Or together at all.

Okay, I think it's time that we head out. Stop avoiding everything.

Thank you for having me over tonight.

And Charlie, congrats.

I will see you when I see you.

Lucas, wait.

What happened?

I knew something was up.

I read them earlier.

What?

I'm an empath.

Your daughter has a gift.

go to the pumpkin patch.

We want different things.

Lucas, you already know who you are and you're not scared of that.

And I think that I want to experience more.

I don't.

I can tell you're starting to figure it out on your own.

And honestly,

I couldn't have wanted it any other way for you.

We can make this work.

Not everything works.

It's okay for you to still be trying to figure out who you are, but I don't

think I can be a part of that.

I still love you.

Bye, Lucas.

Came out of nowhere.

Well, Lucas left.

And we broke up.

Oh, Finny.

I'm sorry, Finn.

Thank you.

What happened?

Where do I begin?

Are you okay?

Yeah.

I am.

Hey.

Hey, what's up?

Thought I'd never see you again.

Well, here I am.

What are you waiting for?

Come on in.

Yeah, um, actually, I know this is weird and I said we would hang out, but I

can't do this right now.

Wait, what?

I'm gonna go.

I'm sorry.

Is this about your boyfriend?

Actually, we just broke up.

Shocker.

Anyway, I'll see ya.

Will you?