Original subtitles

I love you, Regina.

I love you, too.

But I'll always be here.

I'll always be right here.

This won't change that.

Promise.

You'll never let me go.

I promise.

I'll never let you go.

Everything's gonna be okay.

I love you.

There are promises we make in this life.

Some we keep and some we don't.

I've done my best to keep the one I made to my sister the day she died.

To never let her go.

In my heart, as she once was in my skin, my sister lives.

Always.

To say that my sister Tina and I were close would be a bit of an

Tina and I were born February 22, 1995, conjoined at the upper abdomen, what

fans of Chang and Ng, or anyone else for that matter, would call Siamese twins.

A term that neither Tina nor I had much use for, being that we were neither

Siamese nor very twin -like, at least as far as our looks went.

Had we not been connected, most people probably never would have guessed that

were even related.

In many ways, we were very different people.

But as much as we had in contrast, we had in common too.

Like our taste in women, for example, and how we saw ourselves with them.

Thank you.

Let's go.

Oh, yeah.

We dreamt that we looked in our fantasy.

You see, both Tina and I were virgins.

Too much of a freak show to ever land a girl, we'd imagine ourselves with one.

And often, too.

You might think that we were okay with being unlovable, but we weren't.

We both dreamed of love, of sex, of all the same things you dream of.

But even in our fantasies, even in our sexiest thoughts, we saw ourselves

together.

That was about to change.

In a big way.

Once Sarah came along.

But more on her later.

There's probably a lot of other things that you wonder how we did.

Like how we went to the bathroom.

Or how we took a shower.

Or how we drove a car or got dressed.

Or whatever.

In answer to all of the above, the things we could do, we did.

And the things we couldn't, well, we pretty much just said, fuck those

figuring that whatever we couldn't do probably wasn't worth doing.

And isn't that what most people do?

Not every limbless nut climbs Mount Everest.

Most of us stay within our limitations, and pleasantly so.

It cuts down your options, makes it easier to decide on things.

I mean, if you could do anything, would you really want to?

Isn't there more to life than accomplishing stuff?

Like reading a good book?

Or just enjoying the view?

Besides, it wasn't like we were the only people in the world with limitations.

Everybody's got things they can do and things they can't. And knowing the

difference and not letting the bastards get you down about it, the key to being

happy.

That's what Tina taught me anyway.

God bless her.

There was really only one thing that ever really got Tina down. Only one

that she and I thought would never happen that we really, really wanted to.

Then one day it did.

And this is what changed everything for better and for worse.

So, can I interrupt you for just a minute?

Yeah, what's up?

So, I've been on the internet.

for a few months now, talking to this girl, Sarah.

And she's very funny.

She's smart.

She's pretty above all else.

And she wants to take me on a date.

Date?

That's cool.

Like a real date? Or like one where she just wants freaky sex afterward?

No. It's a real date. She's not some weirdo or anything.

She's actually a student.

A biology major.

Biology.

So she's going to come over and cut us open and study us, is what you're

Are you sure she's not a serial killer?

That's not funny.

She's not a serial killer.

You know, this might be the real thing.

And I want to see if it is.

You always do this to me.

Shutting me down.

Like, I can never just have this chance where I can find love.

Okay.

I get your point.

I'm not trying to be a wet blanket.

But, you know, sex is different than love.

Love can complicate things.

I mean, what if you hit it off really well?

How does that work? Where do I fit into that?

Like, would you just put me under the bed when you have sex?

No, of course not.

But we would figure something out.

I'm sure you would, but I'd be stuck with the bed bugs.

Okay, look.

What if I were to tell you that Sarah has a friend?

A friend that can maybe come and join us on a date sometime so you wouldn't be

so lonely?

I don't know.

Please.

I really need this chance to see if this girl is the real thing.

Please let me have this chance.

And that was how we met Sarah and Jay.

Not really, but, you know. Hey, benefit of the doubt. It looks close.

I actually don't know how to play.

I've never played before.

Well, I will teach you.

And hit the white ball.

You have to hit the white ball, and the white ball hits the other ball and

shoots it in. It's like momentum.

And just got to, like, give it one good, like, pop.

Oh, you did good.

Way better than me.

Do you want to try?

Yeah.

I got to go, guys.

This has been really boring.

It was fun. Thanks for coming.

Yeah, thank you. Have a good night. Bye.

But if she's leaving so many of your friends, you should probably go

right? We'd go separately.

Oh, okay.

You're going to stay, right?

Yeah. Okay, I'm going to talk to my sister real fast for one second.

What are you doing?

What are you doing?

She's probably sleeping in the middle of it. Well, I thought she might want to

go to the sandwich.

No, she's here to spend time with me. She's teaching me how to play pool.

I had such a great time.

Yeah, but what happens when you bring her home later and you guys are ready to

fuck? I'm just going to lay there next to you and I'm not going to have any

pleasure of my own.

Well, I'm just asking you to take one for the team. Absolutely not. No, that's

going to be so awkward. I'm going to be laying there and it's not going to be

fun for me and that's going to be weird.

No.

Please, I'm asking you this one thing. I mean, I really like this girl.

She is very accepting.

Come on, you know how it is.

Okay, all right.

What am I supposed to do? Just lay under a blanket?

Okay, cool.

You're very close.

baby do it so well

Have a good night. You too.

You owe me.

I know.

Thank you.

What was that for?

For letting me find love.

I never thought that... Did you?

Well, congratulations.

Come on.

Don't be so sad.

I can't believe you let me have this.

if you realize, but it's kind of a big deal.

Yeah, I do. And so is hiding behind sheets the rest of my life.

Well, we could always get separated.

Fuck you.

Come on, I'm just kidding.

Lighten up.

You know I'd never ask that of you.

Well, you might not, but she might.

I mean, let's say things go really beautifully for you and you get married.

And then, I don't know, maybe you adopt some Filipino children.

And what am I supposed to do? Hide under the sheets for the rest of my life?

Someday, one of you would make us have that surgery.

You know you would.

Let's just cross that bridge when we get to it.

So you have thought about it.

You have thought about going into the night. You selfish bitch.

I'm being selfish.

Really.

I finally find love with someone who doesn't care.

As to the hips, my sister, and I'm the one being selfish, you're asking me to

call this off so you don't feel put out.

It's not fair.

Put out?

Do you know what the success rate for this kind of surgery is?

It's not very great.

And that means one of us, if not both of us, could die.

So, sorry if I want to live and if that means I'm selfish.

Why can't you just be happy for me?

I am.

It's just... You wish it was you?

I didn't say so at the time.

But the answer was yes.

I did wish it was me.

Ever since I was a little girl, I've had a reoccurring dream that one day

someone would come along and see me for me, as my own person, instead of being a

part of someone else.

And that they'd love me forever.

That it happened to Tina was great for her.

And I was happy for her.

I really was.

But it was still my dream.

And the chances of it happening, what with Tina having beaten me to it, were

even less now than they were before.

And that hurt.

What are you doing?

Wishing that someday you'll find love too.

And that when you do, that I'll be there to help you keep it.

Whatever it takes.

Why do you make it so hard for me to say no to you?

Because I'm just so awesome.

Now I know what you're thinking.

That as things with Sarah and my sister got better and better, things for me got

worse and worse.

That as they fell deeper and deeper into love, I fell deeper and deeper into

becoming the world's most awkward third wheel.

My life pretty much did suck hot corn chowder there for a while, hiding behind

the menu as they shared their romantic dinners, pretending to watch the birds

they walked in the park, suffocating under piles of sheets so they could make

love in the world's strangest semblance of privacy, only to lay wide awake as

they cuddled themselves to sleep, breathing the same breath.

And dreaming the same dreams.

My dreams.

Did it hurt?

Was I jealous?

Did it make me feel lonely?

Like I didn't matter? Like I wasn't important?

Like I was invisible and insignificant and useless and ugly?

And that my sister would just be so much better off if I would just die?

Oh my god.

You have no idea.

There was no way anyone could see Tina without seeing me first.

And then Sarah came along.

By some myopic miracle of her heart, she was able to see my sister as just

herself, as something both without and beyond me.

And for Tina, it was a gift from the heavens themselves.

But for me, it was a loneliness I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy.

And for a while, Sarah became that enemy.

As the weeks and months of their relationship rolled by, I'd lay there

them sleep, night after night, fantasizing about all the nasty things

Sarah if I could just get her alone.

But I couldn't get alone with her any more than I could be alone with myself.

My pain would just have to know no relief.

All I could do was eat it, just put it between two slices of bread and swallow

it down like the good little sister I was.

People make love out to be this amazing thing.

And it is.

When it's yours.

And when it's not, it's just the worst.

Especially when it's laying right in front of you.

Night after night after fucking night.

Until one night.

Jay. The girl who Sarah had so unceremoniously set me up with, the girl

blown me off like I didn't exist, called me.

Apparently, she'd had second thoughts about how she treated me that night and

wanted a second chance.

I almost hung up on her, but then I thought, Tina, we're there.

Jay literally walked out on me at that dinner.

Oh, my gosh.

Don't. You're blowing it way out of proportion.

Things will go great this time. You know, first... is the worst, second's

best, right?

I'm so nervous. I just feel like it's going to go, I mean, how is it supposed

go after that?

Don't be nervous.

What if I can't find something to wear?

We'll find you something to wear, don't worry, and you'll look hot, and she'll

want to jump all over you.

Should I dress up or not? It's the second date, but really, it's like we're

going back to the first date because you've walked out on me already.

No. Just stop being so insecure, okay?

You know, Jay wouldn't have called you back if she didn't think you were great.

Can you put that on first?

Oh.

She wouldn't have called you back if she didn't think you were great. And I

definitely think you're great.

So does Sarah.

Sarah thinks I'm great? Yeah. Is that why she insists that I hide under the

sheets every time you have sex?

Come on.

We've been through this.

Just try and be positive.

The greatest night of my life.

Things couldn't have gone better.

Jay was amazing.

As sweet and kind to me on our second date as he had been a total bitch on our

first.

Sir, maybe I was motivated as much by my loneliness and jealousy over Sarah and

Tina as I was by what was great about Jay.

But it didn't matter.

The die was cast.

My heart, which had felt so deflated by Tina and Sarah's constant lovey -dovey,

in -my -face bullshit, was finally beginning to fill again.

And before you knew it, my life went from hiding under the covers to sleeping

top of them again.

Greatest night of my life.

For Sarah, unfortunately, not so much.

As soon as Jay entered the picture, Sarah's feet began to get very, very

Three weeks later, Sarah snuck out in the middle of the night, leaving no more

than a note to explain her cowardice.

The note didn't say nearly enough, and most of what it did say blamed Jay for

everything.

Apparently having Jay in the picture had complicated things to a degree that

poor Sarah just couldn't hang with. She just couldn't be a part of something

so... complex, and multifaceted as a four -way relationship.

But a three -way was okay?

So long as the third person pretended like they didn't exist and felt like

all the time about it?

Among the many skills I honed being conjoined, I was good at reading between

lines. And what I read wasn't that Sarah felt weird sharing her dirty business

with Jay, but that she didn't like seeing me happy.

Saying it was all Jay's fault was nothing more than a cheap lie designed

drive a wedge between my sister and I so that Sarah could have Tina all to

herself.

Quite a challenge considering the fact that we were literally sewn together.

Though, as it turned out, not impossible.

You guys all right?

What is she doing here?

It's hard to breathe.

It's hard to breathe.

Jay, it's probably better if you just go right now.

Just let me stay.

It's okay. I love you.

It's okay. No.

It's okay. No.

That note changed everything.

Now that Tina had a reason to hate Jay, she took it and ran with it.

Had I been smart enough to see what Sarah was up to, That power -hungry,

little koozbox wasn't just breaking up with Tina, but trying to get Tina to

break up with me as well.

I probably could have stopped what happened next, but I wasn't thinking

ahead.

Like all good people, I have a hard time thinking the way evil people think.

All I knew was that my sister was in pain, and that her pain was my pain, and

that I wanted that pain to stop by any means necessary.

Still, as badly as I wanted to help my sister, and as much as I wanted to

respect her wishes to not see Jay anymore, the fact was, I was in love.

Madly in love.

Let's sing it.

Tina felt betrayed, like I was cheating on her with Jay.

And in a way, I guess I was.

I knew she didn't want me to be with her, but I just couldn't help myself.

And why should I have?

After all, hadn't I eaten all the pain I could swallow from my sister when she

asked me to?

I hated seeing her with Sarah, but I went along with it.

I did my part to be a good sister, even though it sucked wet rat balls.

Hiding under seats, ducking behind newspapers, living in the shadows so

kiss goodnight without having to kiss me too.

That shit was fucking ridiculous.

But I had done it.

And more.

All so she could have love.

Why couldn't she do the same for me?

Why?

But she couldn't.

Call her a hypocrite.

Call her a bad sister.

Call her a double standard loving bitch.

It didn't matter.

Jay was to blame for Sarah breaking Tina's heart, and as such, she wasn't

welcome in our home.

After a couple of months of keeping our love affair alive via texts, emails, and

the occasional sneaky sex, it became clear that there was only one way for me

and Jay to really be together.

Only one.

And it was a doozy.

You know, I just don't feel like it's fair to me, okay?

You know how I feel about us being together.

Is it always about you? I mean, like, when you were with Sarah, I tried so

to stay invisible, and I really tried to make it about you and her, and... Well,

thanks for trying, but, you know, I still don't want to be detached from

You know, what if one of us doesn't make it?

What are you saying? Like, people do surgeries like this all the time when

have... But still, there's that risk.

No. Well, I'm willing to take that risk, and I feel like you should want to

support me in that. I mean, like, think about somebody else than yourself for a

second.

Well, you know, it's not like you and Jay are even that serious.

It's not like you guys are getting married or anything, okay?

Well, actually, we are getting married.

Since when?

Since about a week ago, Jay, you... And you were never going to tell me this?

You were asleep. Jay came over and asked me.

Wow. I was going to tell you, but, I mean, look at how you're reacting.

Yeah, like a bitch. And, you know, I probably would have acted like that

too.

This is moving so fast.

Why?

I can't believe this.

It's okay.

You know,

I don't know. It's way...

Okay. Just think about it. You know, I made a promise to you.

I'm going to stick to that promise.

Okay.

Okay, what?

Okay, the surgery.

You know... Okay, really?

Yes, if you... You're not just saying that?

No. If you and Jay are serious, like you say you are, I support you, and we'll

call the doctor and get it lined up. Oh, my God. Yes.

Thank you so much.

Call it an early wedding present and an apology for me being such a bitch to you

since Sarah left me.

I really thought it would take you longer to be okay with it. It really

much to me.

And I know that it does. So I know it's important. It's going to happen.

Thank you so much. I love you. You're the best sister I could ever ask for.

Me too.

The war is going to be right here.

This is never going to change that.

I promise.

You won't let me go.

I don't want to go.

Okay.

We're going to administer the propofol now.

It'll put you to sleep for the duration of the surgery.

I'm going to count backwards from ten.

Ten. Nine.

Eight.

Seven.

Six.

Five.

Four.

Three.

Two.

When I woke up, they told me Tina hadn't made it and that there had been

complications and that they had done everything in their power to save her

that she had died peacefully and painlessly, as if that was supposed to

okay.

It didn't.

I cried for the better part of the next year.

There was no time to appreciate my own survival, let alone my newfound freedom.

To me, there was nothing free about my life without her.

I had never known a life without Tina.

Now it was all I could ever know again.

And everywhere I looked, I saw it.

Staring back at me, screaming back at me, and the sag of the mattress that had

been on her side of the bed.

In the closet where her clothes still hung.

In her bookcase where all the books she never had time to read would now sit,

collecting dust forever, unread, for the rest of my life.

A life I didn't care about living anymore.

With Tina gone, there was nothing I wanted to do and no one I wanted to do

with.

And that included Jay.

Though it wasn't her fault, deep down, in a part of me I could neither reach

change, I couldn't help but blame Jay for what had happened to Tina.

Had she not proposed to me, had I never met her in the first place, Tina and I

would have never had that surgery.

And she'd still be alive.

Poor Jay.

All she wanted to do was love me.

But without my sister, the idea of loving anyone was beyond my heart's

to comprehend.

I was only half of what I was with Tina.

Half a body, half a soul, half a heart.

It was all I could do to get out of the bed, let alone give Jade the love she

deserved.

I cared about nothing and no one.

Not even myself.

Well, there was one thing I cared about.

Only one.

Getting revenge on the person I did blame for Tina's death.

Someone who deserved the pain that Jay didn't.

Someone who deserved more pain than anyone ever.

Though blaming Jay for Tina's death was irrational and left me feeling shaky and

ashamed, I had no problem blaming Sarah for it.

I could do that shit with fucking bigger.

No problem.

Sarah was the river of shit from which all the damage of the past year and a

half had flowed.

The noxious, polluted, arsenic -contaminated river that it was up to me

once and for all.

Had Sarah never entered the picture, Tina would still be alive.

And that was a fact.

That conniving little heartbreaker had to go.

That fucking little note writer.

Wedge driver.

Homewrecker.

Murderer.

A murderer not long for this world if I had anything to say about it.

And on the night of May 1st, 2013, I did.

I had plenty to say.

I figured a little poetic justice was in order.

A little bit of ghoullessness worthy of a full news week on all the local

channels.

Make Sarah into the freak she'd abandoned.

Give her a taste of her own Siamese medicine, so to speak.

All of which would have happened had Sarah not caught me coming through the

and done something I wasn't expecting.

Dina, what are you doing here?

Can I get you anything to drink?

No.

Thank you.

Okay. So, were you coming over here to kill me?

In a matter of speaking, I was going to sell you to your new girlfriend.

Okay. She's not my girlfriend.

She's just somebody I see when I get depressed, okay?

You wouldn't have felt it.

I would have killed you first. I'm not a monster.

I appreciate that.

And, by the way, I'm really sorry about Tina.

I know you guys were really close.

No pun intended, of course.

I'm taken.

You don't have to be sorry.

It's not your fault.

Well, of course you might think so since you're over here right now and you

were about to kill me.

I just...

Wanted someone to blame.

Well, if it makes you feel better, then blame me, because I shouldn't have

dumped your sister the way I did, and it was messed up.

So... I'm sorry.

I'm really sorry.

I appreciate that.

So, can I get you anything?

Um... Can I do anything for you?

Maybe, um... Can I have that drink, I guess?

If you're still offering.

Yeah, you got it.

Funny how things go.

One minute you're about to kill someone, and the next you're drinking with them,

having sex, falling in love and getting married, all of which happened in a way,

and for reasons that I still can't quite explain.

And in my memories, in my blood, and in my skin, I carry

the best of my sister.

All the good she was.

All the beauty she knew.

All her life had allowed.

In me, she lives always.

In my skin.

I will never let her go.