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1
00:00:04,800 --> 00:00:07,900
Okay.
What do you think of them?
2
00:00:07,800 --> 00:00:11,400
Oh. I knew you'd hate 'em.
God. it's just a stupid invention.
3
00:00:11,300 --> 00:00:13,100
What made me
think that a little pillow
4
00:00:13,000 --> 00:00:15,900
that cups and cushions the ass
against the ravages of subway travel
5
00:00:15,800 --> 00:00:19,200
would be a good idea?
6
00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:22,900
I like the name...
"The Subway Tush."
7
00:00:24,200 --> 00:00:26,200
And there's the icky face.
Okay. I'm leaving.
8
00:00:26,100 --> 00:00:30,100
I knew you were gonna
think it's stupid. I'm so humiliated.
9
00:00:30,200 --> 00:00:32,100
- What is he doing--
- Wait for it.
10
00:00:32,100 --> 00:00:35,500
At least have the decency
to sit on it.
11
00:00:35,300 --> 00:00:36,700
I think you'll find yourself saying.
12
00:00:36,700 --> 00:00:40,700
"Did my heinie die
and go to heaven?"
13
00:00:46,200 --> 00:00:49,100
Ooh.
14
00:00:49,000 --> 00:00:53,000
Oh my God.
This feels really good.
15
00:00:53,000 --> 00:00:56,900
Oh. my tush
is loving the cush of "The Tush."
16
00:00:57,000 --> 00:00:59,100
Yeah. it's squishy.
It's comfy.
17
00:00:59,000 --> 00:01:01,900
It's... oddly exciting.
18
00:01:01,800 --> 00:01:05,800
Overall. I'd have to say.
it's the butt's meow.
19
00:01:05,700 --> 00:01:08,000
Shut up!
Oh my God. you really like it?
20
00:01:07,900 --> 00:01:09,500
I knew you would!
21
00:01:09,400 --> 00:01:12,000
Now. there's
just one teensy little thing.
22
00:01:11,900 --> 00:01:15,600
I need $50.000 for start-up costs.
23
00:01:15,500 --> 00:01:17,200
50.000?
Well... sure. Jack.
24
00:01:17,100 --> 00:01:21,100
Do you want me to write you a check
or shall I pay you in cheese?
25
00:01:21,200 --> 00:01:22,900
I can take a check.
26
00:01:22,900 --> 00:01:26,900
Hey. zippy.
I'm not giving you any money.
27
00:01:27,400 --> 00:01:31,300
Selfish!
28
00:01:35,200 --> 00:01:39,200
You believe that guy. soaking me
for 50 large? Forget about it.
29
00:01:39,200 --> 00:01:41,400
Okay. First of all.
30
00:01:41,300 --> 00:01:44,900
you've just officially been cut off
from "The Sopranos."
31
00:01:44,700 --> 00:01:47,300
And second. how could you
just dismiss him like that?
32
00:01:47,200 --> 00:01:50,400
- What are you talking about?
- Look. it is hard for him.
33
00:01:50,300 --> 00:01:52,300
I work all day. you work all day.
34
00:01:52,200 --> 00:01:56,200
He comes home at 3:00
to an empty house. I worry about him.
35
00:01:57,100 --> 00:02:01,000
Sooner or later. the boy's gotta learn
that life is not easy!
36
00:02:03,600 --> 00:02:06,900
Uh. I guess you're right.
37
00:02:06,800 --> 00:02:10,100
Our little girl is growing up.
38
00:02:09,900 --> 00:02:13,900
( theme music playing )
39
00:02:21,300 --> 00:02:23,300
Grace:
So, once again,
40
00:02:23,200 --> 00:02:26,000
I just wanna say thank you.
41
00:02:25,900 --> 00:02:29,400
Honey. quit thanking me.
You sound just like Stan after--
42
00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:32,600
just after.
43
00:02:32,500 --> 00:02:35,800
No. no. Really. really.
I never would've gotten
44
00:02:35,600 --> 00:02:38,500
a meeting with Robert Lilienfield
if you hadn't made the call.
45
00:02:38,400 --> 00:02:42,400
Come on. Grace. you could've
gotten it on your own.
46
00:02:42,700 --> 00:02:46,300
You get it? No way.
47
00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:50,200
Oh. drink your lunch.
48
00:02:52,000 --> 00:02:54,100
( whispers )
Oh my God!
49
00:02:54,000 --> 00:02:56,500
- Look who it is.
- Honey. I don't look.
50
00:02:56,400 --> 00:02:59,500
I'm looked at.
51
00:02:59,400 --> 00:03:02,600
- Who is it?
- It's Helena Barnes.
52
00:03:02,500 --> 00:03:06,400
She's like-- Iike the best
interior designer working today!
53
00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:08,000
She-- Iook at her! Look at her!
54
00:03:07,900 --> 00:03:10,200
No! No! Don't look.
She'll see you looking.
55
00:03:10,200 --> 00:03:12,100
Okay! She's looking away.
Go look. Iook. Iook.
56
00:03:12,000 --> 00:03:13,700
Oh. good Lord love a duck!
57
00:03:13,600 --> 00:03:17,600
Hey. Hel. put the caboose in motion.
Somebody wants to meet you! Come on!
58
00:03:18,400 --> 00:03:20,200
Oh my God.
59
00:03:20,100 --> 00:03:21,800
Hi. I am Grace Adler.
60
00:03:21,800 --> 00:03:23,800
- and it is such an honor--
- Karen. I was convinced
61
00:03:23,700 --> 00:03:27,700
that nasty smell
was coming from the kitchen.
62
00:03:27,800 --> 00:03:31,800
No. honey. I think you just caught
a whiff of your own liver rotting.
63
00:03:35,600 --> 00:03:37,600
Listen. I want you
to meet Grace Adler.
64
00:03:37,500 --> 00:03:40,400
She-- she thinks you're really
something special. but then again.
65
00:03:40,300 --> 00:03:44,300
she's never seen you face down
in a pool of your own sick. She hasn't.
66
00:03:44,600 --> 00:03:48,600
- Grace. enchanted to meet you.
- Oh. hi.
67
00:03:52,200 --> 00:03:53,900
The honor--
the honor is mine.
68
00:03:53,900 --> 00:03:57,900
I mean. I would curtsy.
if it weren't weird.
69
00:03:57,900 --> 00:04:01,200
Oh my God. I'm like one of those losers.
when they meet William Shatner
70
00:04:01,100 --> 00:04:03,500
at a Trekkie convention.
71
00:04:03,400 --> 00:04:07,300
- Oh. you are adorable!
- Thank you! Oh!
72
00:04:07,100 --> 00:04:09,100
Hi! Who is this?
73
00:04:09,000 --> 00:04:11,600
- This is Paxil.
- Oh...
74
00:04:11,500 --> 00:04:15,500
And she asks
that you don't touch her.
75
00:04:15,400 --> 00:04:18,700
Oh. well. whatever
little Paxil-waxil wants--
76
00:04:18,600 --> 00:04:20,800
Nor speak to her.
77
00:04:20,700 --> 00:04:23,800
- You know. Hel. Grace is a designer.
- Helena: Oh.
78
00:04:23,700 --> 00:04:27,700
She's great.
She's better than you.
79
00:04:28,000 --> 00:04:31,300
I'm sure she is.
Well. Karen. I'd love to sit
80
00:04:31,200 --> 00:04:35,100
and watch you suck your stomach in
for the next 20 minutes.
81
00:04:34,900 --> 00:04:37,900
but I really do have to go.
I've got such a busy week.
82
00:04:37,800 --> 00:04:40,800
Between the Sandler's beach house
and Pierre's new restaurant
83
00:04:40,700 --> 00:04:42,800
and an interview
with Robert Lilienfield.
84
00:04:42,700 --> 00:04:45,700
- I simply don't have a moment.
- Robert Lilienfield?
85
00:04:45,600 --> 00:04:49,000
Yes. Can you believe
that he wants to put me
86
00:04:48,800 --> 00:04:52,300
through the formality of an interview.
before he hires me?
87
00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:56,200
Why is it that men are only interested
in foreplay when it comes to business?
88
00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:57,800
Grace. charmed.
89
00:04:57,700 --> 00:05:01,300
Karen. appalled.
90
00:05:01,200 --> 00:05:05,200
Hel. honey.
Iove you like a cold sore.
91
00:05:06,900 --> 00:05:10,900
Ah. she's sweet.
Okay... where's the waiter?
92
00:05:11,100 --> 00:05:13,900
- I want to start celebrating.
- There's nothing to celebrate.
93
00:05:13,800 --> 00:05:15,900
I'm canceling
the meeting with Lilienfield.
94
00:05:15,800 --> 00:05:18,900
- What? Honey. why?
- Because I'm not gonna get the job.
95
00:05:18,800 --> 00:05:21,800
I mean. it's-- it's Helena Barnes.
96
00:05:21,700 --> 00:05:23,700
and I'm Grace Adler.
97
00:05:23,600 --> 00:05:27,600
I mean. she's an international
design... goddess!
98
00:05:27,500 --> 00:05:29,700
And I'm Grace Adler.
99
00:05:29,700 --> 00:05:33,700
Come on. do you really think that?
You really think she's better than you?
100
00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:37,600
I can't afford Louis Vuitton.
and her dog poops in it.
101
00:05:41,000 --> 00:05:43,200
All right. I shouldn't do this.
102
00:05:43,100 --> 00:05:44,900
but... come on.
I'm gonna take you somewhere
103
00:05:44,800 --> 00:05:47,400
that's gonna make you feel
a whole lot better about yourself.
104
00:05:47,300 --> 00:05:49,100
Oh. Karen.
I don't wanna go
105
00:05:49,000 --> 00:05:53,000
to the pharmacy
for another one of your test drives.
106
00:05:53,000 --> 00:05:57,000
Come on. not there! Move it. move it!
Make it sing! Get it!
107
00:05:59,600 --> 00:06:03,100
Oh my God. Will.
We are gonna make so much money.
108
00:06:02,900 --> 00:06:06,900
I'm already eyeing a manse
in the Hamptons.
109
00:06:07,700 --> 00:06:10,300
It's three manses down
from the Puffy-Lopezes.
110
00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:11,800
Hmm...
111
00:06:11,700 --> 00:06:15,400
it's been a while since you've had
three manses in the Hamptons.
112
00:06:15,300 --> 00:06:17,600
You do realize this is
just a meeting with investors.
113
00:06:17,500 --> 00:06:20,100
There's no guarantee they're
gonna come through with the money.
114
00:06:20,000 --> 00:06:24,000
although I must say.
they'd be crazy if they don't.
115
00:06:25,000 --> 00:06:29,000
What? Do you have to go
sissy again?
116
00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:32,400
You...
117
00:06:32,300 --> 00:06:34,600
believing in me...
118
00:06:34,500 --> 00:06:36,500
being my business partner.
119
00:06:36,400 --> 00:06:37,700
- Who's my hero?
- Oh!
120
00:06:37,600 --> 00:06:39,200
Who's my hero?
121
00:06:39,200 --> 00:06:43,200
You are the wind beneath my tush.
122
00:06:44,200 --> 00:06:46,900
Well. Iet's not delve
into that one too deeply.
123
00:06:46,800 --> 00:06:48,900
Now. I thought we'd start
by you talking
124
00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:51,800
- about how you first came up with--
- No. no. no. You do the talking.
125
00:06:51,700 --> 00:06:54,700
That's what you're good at.
See. you're the quarterback.
126
00:06:54,600 --> 00:06:58,600
I'm just the slutty cheerleader
with the nice rack.
127
00:06:58,800 --> 00:07:00,700
All right. Well.
if you feel like chiming in--
128
00:07:00,600 --> 00:07:03,200
No. no. no. I won't.
129
00:07:03,100 --> 00:07:04,300
- Will.
- Hey.
130
00:07:04,300 --> 00:07:06,200
- Good to see you.
- Bob. always a pleasure.
131
00:07:06,100 --> 00:07:08,200
- This is my partner. Jack McFarland.
- Hello. Jack.
132
00:07:08,100 --> 00:07:12,100
Well. everybody take a seat.
I think we're ready to start.
133
00:07:13,300 --> 00:07:15,500
- Gentlemen--
- Introducing the Subway Tush!
134
00:07:15,400 --> 00:07:17,400
- Jack!
- Hey. mon fr�re
135
00:07:17,300 --> 00:07:20,000
lf your derri�re
could use a little cush
136
00:07:19,900 --> 00:07:22,500
No need to pout.
the word is out
137
00:07:22,400 --> 00:07:26,400
It's Jack's Subway Tush!
138
00:07:30,500 --> 00:07:34,400
Taco Time?
What are we doing at Taco Time?
139
00:07:34,200 --> 00:07:36,200
And--
140
00:07:36,100 --> 00:07:40,100
wait. did you bring that drink
from the restaurant?
141
00:07:40,100 --> 00:07:43,900
What is this. Vegas?
142
00:07:43,800 --> 00:07:45,900
- Look. Karen--
- Hey. forget it. Red!
143
00:07:45,800 --> 00:07:48,100
Don't call me by my real name.
144
00:07:48,000 --> 00:07:52,000
Call me by my alias.
"Anastasia Beaverhausen."
145
00:07:55,300 --> 00:07:57,200
I wanna be incognito.
146
00:07:57,100 --> 00:08:00,400
Why? Who could
possibly know you here?
147
00:08:00,300 --> 00:08:02,500
I don't know.
148
00:08:02,400 --> 00:08:05,400
Hmm. the Duchess of York.
149
00:08:05,300 --> 00:08:09,300
What? Why would the Duch--
oh my God. it's Fergie!
150
00:08:10,600 --> 00:08:14,600
Do you think that Weight Watchers
knows about this?
151
00:08:15,100 --> 00:08:18,000
What is going on here?
( sighing )
152
00:08:17,900 --> 00:08:20,100
Taco Time
is a guilty pleasure
153
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:22,500
for some of the ladies
in my circle.
154
00:08:22,400 --> 00:08:25,100
Nobody questions it.
155
00:08:25,000 --> 00:08:28,600
Nobody talks about it.
156
00:08:28,500 --> 00:08:31,200
Okay. but why are we here?
157
00:08:31,100 --> 00:08:35,100
Come on. Grace.
It's like it says in the Bible:
158
00:08:35,200 --> 00:08:39,200
"The best way to make you feel good is
to make someone else look bad."
159
00:08:40,400 --> 00:08:42,800
And nothing looks
worse than a socialite shoveling
160
00:08:42,700 --> 00:08:46,600
a couple of Taco Gigantes
down her gullet.
161
00:08:46,400 --> 00:08:49,000
- Are you trying to tell me that Hel--
- Over there. honey.
162
00:08:48,900 --> 00:08:52,400
The slob in the dark glasses.
163
00:08:52,200 --> 00:08:53,900
Are you sure that's her?
164
00:08:53,900 --> 00:08:56,000
Paxil. if you are not
going to finish that. Mummy will.
165
00:08:55,900 --> 00:08:58,200
All right? Very well. then.
166
00:08:58,100 --> 00:09:02,100
It's mine!
167
00:09:08,800 --> 00:09:11,900
When is she
gonna come up for air?
168
00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:15,100
And she's-- I mean. my God!
Oh. Anastasia.
169
00:09:15,000 --> 00:09:18,300
this is the best gift
you've ever given me!
170
00:09:18,100 --> 00:09:21,700
Don't kid yourself. honey.
I didn't do it for you.
171
00:09:21,600 --> 00:09:23,600
Helena took our slip
at the yacht club.
172
00:09:23,500 --> 00:09:27,100
and drilling a hole in the bottom
of her boat just didn't turn my crank
173
00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:30,000
the way I thought it would.
174
00:09:29,900 --> 00:09:33,900
It is amazing how long Rosario
can stay underwater though.
175
00:09:38,000 --> 00:09:41,900
Thanks. Iadies!
You've been a great crowd!
176
00:09:41,700 --> 00:09:45,700
Love ya! Love ya like lovin'!
( kissing )
177
00:09:45,700 --> 00:09:48,100
- Nice. Nice work.
- Really?
178
00:09:48,000 --> 00:09:52,000
Yeah. Rip Taylor
would've been proud.
179
00:09:53,800 --> 00:09:56,000
Uh. Jack. can I speak
with you for a moment?
180
00:09:55,900 --> 00:09:59,900
Sure.
181
00:10:00,900 --> 00:10:04,900
- Have a seat.
- Oh.
182
00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:10,400
First of all. I just wanna tell you
183
00:10:10,400 --> 00:10:13,000
that we really love your product
184
00:10:12,900 --> 00:10:16,800
and we're prepared
to back you 100%.
185
00:10:16,600 --> 00:10:20,600
Oh my God! You wanna put everything
you've got into my Tush?
186
00:10:22,600 --> 00:10:25,800
Well. that's not the way
legal would put it. but yes.
187
00:10:25,600 --> 00:10:28,300
This is great! Oh my God.
I can't wait to tell Will!
188
00:10:28,200 --> 00:10:30,200
Oh. yeah. about that.
We want him out.
189
00:10:30,100 --> 00:10:34,000
Oh. he is. Everybody knows.
190
00:10:35,800 --> 00:10:39,700
No. I mean "out" as in "out."
191
00:10:39,500 --> 00:10:40,700
What?
192
00:10:40,700 --> 00:10:43,600
It's just that your presentation
was so dynamic.
193
00:10:43,500 --> 00:10:47,500
but then Will kept interrupting to talk
about thinking small and slow growth.
194
00:10:47,300 --> 00:10:49,800
that's not the direction
we wanna take. We'd like him gone.
195
00:10:49,700 --> 00:10:52,100
So. what are you saying?
196
00:10:52,000 --> 00:10:56,000
You expect me to sell out my business
partner and best friend of 13 years
197
00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:59,800
for a scrap of foam rubber
and a few measly shekels?
198
00:10:59,700 --> 00:11:03,500
How dare you. sir?
How dare you?
199
00:11:03,300 --> 00:11:05,700
This is what
we are prepared to offer.
200
00:11:05,600 --> 00:11:09,600
He'll be gone by tomorrow.
201
00:11:18,100 --> 00:11:21,500
- Hey. Will.
- Hello. Jack.
202
00:11:21,300 --> 00:11:24,000
- Whatcha reading?
- A book.
203
00:11:23,900 --> 00:11:27,900
- Would I like it?
- No. there's nothing to color in.
204
00:11:29,700 --> 00:11:33,700
Look. I spoke to the investors
after you left today...
205
00:11:34,200 --> 00:11:35,300
And?
206
00:11:35,200 --> 00:11:38,100
And...
207
00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:40,900
there's something
I should tell you.
208
00:11:40,800 --> 00:11:43,000
- Sit down.
- I am sitting down.
209
00:11:42,900 --> 00:11:46,900
Okay. you don't have
to bite my head off!
210
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:49,900
They said. um...
211
00:11:49,800 --> 00:11:53,800
they said...
they need to think about it.
212
00:11:54,900 --> 00:11:56,400
They need to think about it.
213
00:11:56,300 --> 00:11:59,000
- Yeah.
- Okay.
214
00:11:58,900 --> 00:12:02,600
Let me explain what that means.
That means... "no."
215
00:12:02,500 --> 00:12:06,000
And do you know why they're
saying no. Jack? Because of you.
216
00:12:05,800 --> 00:12:08,200
- Will. I don't think--
- Exactly! You don't think!
217
00:12:08,100 --> 00:12:11,000
I mean. first you start with that
ridiculous song-and-dance number.
218
00:12:10,900 --> 00:12:12,900
with Hey. mon fr�re,
with your derri�re
219
00:12:12,800 --> 00:12:16,100
Could use a little-- thpp.
What the hell is that?!
220
00:12:16,000 --> 00:12:18,300
- You said to chime in.
- Yes. but by "chime"
221
00:12:18,200 --> 00:12:21,300
I did not mean
"The Bell of Saint Mary."
222
00:12:21,200 --> 00:12:23,900
- Will. Listen--
- No. then-- then you bend over
223
00:12:23,700 --> 00:12:25,900
in front of Lawrence Weber.
a grandfather of four
224
00:12:25,900 --> 00:12:28,500
and a large contributor
to the Republican National Committee.
225
00:12:28,300 --> 00:12:32,200
and ask him to squeeze
your happy heinie!
226
00:12:32,100 --> 00:12:36,100
Hey. I got a vibe from him.
but that's a whole 'nother story.
227
00:12:37,900 --> 00:12:41,400
And to top it all off. you produce...
228
00:12:41,300 --> 00:12:43,100
this--
229
00:12:43,000 --> 00:12:46,200
this sad. obscene thing.
230
00:12:46,100 --> 00:12:50,100
this... butt puppet.
231
00:12:50,100 --> 00:12:53,200
Buttford happens
to be our spokes-puppet.
232
00:12:53,100 --> 00:12:56,200
You stole Grace's pantyhose.
drew a face on them.
233
00:12:56,100 --> 00:12:57,800
and then addressed people with it.
234
00:12:57,700 --> 00:12:59,300
They were laughing.
235
00:12:59,200 --> 00:13:01,800
You turned a meeting
with my colleagues
236
00:13:01,700 --> 00:13:05,700
into Circus-O-Gay!
237
00:13:07,200 --> 00:13:10,400
All of this adds up to the fact that
we're not gonna get any financing.
238
00:13:10,200 --> 00:13:12,800
because people do not generally
give large sums of money
239
00:13:12,700 --> 00:13:14,900
to crass. juvenile
performing monkeys!
240
00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:16,700
Then how come
they want me and not you?
241
00:13:16,700 --> 00:13:19,200
Because l-- what?
242
00:13:19,100 --> 00:13:20,500
Yeah. that's right.
243
00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:22,100
They said you think too small.
244
00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:25,400
They want you out.
245
00:13:25,300 --> 00:13:29,300
They liked my vision. they liked
my energy. they liked my passion.
246
00:13:29,100 --> 00:13:32,300
And they liked Buttford!
247
00:13:32,200 --> 00:13:36,100
They sent me here to fire you.
248
00:13:35,900 --> 00:13:39,900
So...
now who's the monkey. huh?
249
00:13:46,500 --> 00:13:48,100
Hi.
250
00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:52,000
I need some advice.
251
00:13:52,500 --> 00:13:54,300
Did you just walk
across the hall like that?
252
00:13:54,200 --> 00:13:57,300
No. Actually. I put my bra on
when I got to the door.
253
00:13:57,200 --> 00:14:01,200
'cause I know
how my girly parts embarrass you.
254
00:14:01,200 --> 00:14:05,200
I can handle it.
I watch "Animal Planet."
255
00:14:06,200 --> 00:14:10,100
Okay. I need help here. I've got my
meeting with Lilienfield this afternoon.
256
00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:12,600
So do I go...
257
00:14:12,500 --> 00:14:14,800
smarty turtleneck. hmm?
258
00:14:14,700 --> 00:14:17,000
Or...
259
00:14:16,900 --> 00:14:18,200
bold...
260
00:14:18,100 --> 00:14:21,600
cleavage blouse?
261
00:14:21,500 --> 00:14:24,100
- Well. they're both fine.
- Fine?
262
00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:25,700
I don't know.
Whichever one you like better.
263
00:14:25,600 --> 00:14:27,700
What?!
264
00:14:27,600 --> 00:14:30,400
Will. what is the point of having
a gay best friend.
265
00:14:30,300 --> 00:14:33,900
if you're not gonna dress me?
266
00:14:33,700 --> 00:14:35,200
What's wrong with you?
267
00:14:35,200 --> 00:14:37,500
It's just this whole
Subway Tush thing.
268
00:14:37,400 --> 00:14:39,600
I didn't even want
to get involved in the first place.
269
00:14:39,500 --> 00:14:41,800
as you may recall.
I was trying to be a good friend.
270
00:14:41,700 --> 00:14:44,100
so I went to all the trouble
of setting up all these meetings
271
00:14:44,000 --> 00:14:46,800
with these investors. and the whole
thing blows up in my face. I just--
272
00:14:46,700 --> 00:14:48,900
Jack sold me out. I'll tell you that.
273
00:14:48,800 --> 00:14:52,500
Will. I-- I think
he's more than made it up to you.
274
00:14:52,300 --> 00:14:54,500
- What? How?
- He's resigning.
275
00:14:54,500 --> 00:14:57,300
- He's what?!
- Yeah. I spoke to him this morning.
276
00:14:57,100 --> 00:15:00,200
I called him. 'cause--
I know this sounds crazy.
277
00:15:00,100 --> 00:15:04,100
but I was missing all these pantyhose.
and I thought he might've taken them.
278
00:15:06,100 --> 00:15:09,200
I was wrong.
But anyway. that's--
279
00:15:09,000 --> 00:15:10,600
that's what he told me.
280
00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:14,000
He's resigning? I don't--
why would he do that?
281
00:15:13,800 --> 00:15:16,800
He said because he loves you
282
00:15:16,700 --> 00:15:19,300
and he's your friend
and he doesn't wanna do it without you.
283
00:15:19,200 --> 00:15:22,400
In fact. I think
he's doing it right now.
284
00:15:22,300 --> 00:15:25,500
Oh. my God. I--
he-- he can't do that.
285
00:15:25,300 --> 00:15:29,300
I love that he wants to. but...
his Tush means everything to him.
286
00:15:30,100 --> 00:15:34,000
- I can't let this happen.
- Wait a minute. Wait. wait! Hey. hey!
287
00:15:33,900 --> 00:15:37,400
- What about me?
- Oh...
288
00:15:37,200 --> 00:15:39,700
this with this.
289
00:15:39,600 --> 00:15:42,800
change the lipstick.
hair up and...
290
00:15:42,700 --> 00:15:46,700
here are your hose.
291
00:15:49,700 --> 00:15:53,700
So without Will.
you guys don't get Jack.
292
00:15:54,500 --> 00:15:58,300
- In conclusion. gentlemen. I resign.
- Stop saying that.
293
00:15:58,100 --> 00:16:02,100
You cannot resign from a project you've
already been forcibly removed from.
294
00:16:02,100 --> 00:16:04,200
You stole this idea.
295
00:16:04,200 --> 00:16:08,100
Look. when you say it like that.
of course it's gonna sound bad.
296
00:16:07,900 --> 00:16:10,900
You told us you had
a patent on this product.
297
00:16:10,800 --> 00:16:13,800
when in fact.
the idea of the Subway Tush
298
00:16:13,700 --> 00:16:16,000
belongs to a Mr. Bjorn Stevenson.
299
00:16:15,900 --> 00:16:18,400
Hey. he said he was
moving back to Sweden.
300
00:16:18,300 --> 00:16:20,800
Then again. he also said he could
bench-press my weight.
301
00:16:20,700 --> 00:16:24,300
which led
to a very painful breakup.
302
00:16:24,100 --> 00:16:27,500
I don't think you understand. We're
seriously considering legal action.
303
00:16:27,400 --> 00:16:31,400
I know you are. but what am l?
304
00:16:31,600 --> 00:16:34,100
Gentlemen. please stop.
305
00:16:34,000 --> 00:16:36,900
Hey! I know what's going on here
and I'm not gonna let it happen.
306
00:16:36,800 --> 00:16:38,900
I urge you. do not to accept
this man's resignation.
307
00:16:38,800 --> 00:16:41,100
- He's only doing it out of love for me.
- Will--
308
00:16:41,000 --> 00:16:43,600
No. don't. Please. Jack.
Iet me say this.
309
00:16:43,500 --> 00:16:46,200
When you have the opportunity to go
into business with someone like Jack.
310
00:16:46,100 --> 00:16:48,000
you don't let that
slip through your fingers.
311
00:16:47,900 --> 00:16:50,700
- Will. Iisten--
- Jack has... passion.
312
00:16:50,600 --> 00:16:52,800
He has vision and most of all
313
00:16:52,700 --> 00:16:54,700
Jack has originality.
314
00:16:54,600 --> 00:16:58,600
There is not an idea in this man's head
that is not fresh. unique--
315
00:16:58,500 --> 00:17:02,300
- Shut up. Will. I stole the idea.
- What?
316
00:17:02,200 --> 00:17:05,500
Apparently. the Subway Tush
is not his idea.
317
00:17:05,300 --> 00:17:07,800
It belongs
to what I've ascertained
318
00:17:07,700 --> 00:17:11,500
is an ex-lover
of Swedish extraction.
319
00:17:11,400 --> 00:17:14,200
You stole this from Bjorn?
320
00:17:14,100 --> 00:17:17,100
- What about edible bike shorts?
- Jack.
321
00:17:16,900 --> 00:17:18,900
Come on. 10 miles into the ride.
you get hungry.
322
00:17:18,800 --> 00:17:22,800
there's a snack
right there on your leg!
323
00:17:24,900 --> 00:17:27,100
- All right. How we doing. honey?
- I'm good.
324
00:17:27,000 --> 00:17:31,000
My pantyhose have a smiley face on 'em.
but I'm ready to go.
325
00:17:30,900 --> 00:17:33,000
Terrif. Now listen.
326
00:17:32,900 --> 00:17:35,100
She's gonna come in here
and act all superior.
327
00:17:35,100 --> 00:17:36,900
- but don't you let her intimidate you.
- I won't.
328
00:17:36,800 --> 00:17:40,800
Good girl. Now. I'm gonna
go look at an island. but remember...
329
00:17:40,600 --> 00:17:43,500
if you start thinking
Helena is something special.
330
00:17:43,400 --> 00:17:46,400
just picture that albino rat of hers
licking mol� sauce off her mug.
331
00:17:46,300 --> 00:17:48,800
Got it?
332
00:17:48,700 --> 00:17:51,400
Got it. Thank you.
I'm ready.
333
00:17:51,300 --> 00:17:53,700
- Medusa!
- Medea.
334
00:17:53,600 --> 00:17:56,600
Well... hello. again.
335
00:17:56,400 --> 00:17:58,600
I must say
I'm surprised to see you here.
336
00:17:58,500 --> 00:18:00,200
Well. I'm up for the job as well.
337
00:18:00,200 --> 00:18:02,000
- Really?
- Mm-hmm.
338
00:18:01,900 --> 00:18:05,100
- Oh. Well. may the best designer win.
- Ha!
339
00:18:05,000 --> 00:18:09,000
Not if I have anything
to say about it.
340
00:18:09,900 --> 00:18:12,500
You're a strange girl. aren't you?
341
00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:15,400
Why do the British
always insult you
342
00:18:15,300 --> 00:18:19,300
and then ask you
to agree with them?
343
00:18:19,300 --> 00:18:21,300
Maybe because we think
that you Americans
344
00:18:21,300 --> 00:18:24,500
are just a little bit silly.
don't you think?
345
00:18:24,300 --> 00:18:27,900
- Helena! Hello.
- Robert.
346
00:18:27,800 --> 00:18:30,600
How are you?
I'm so sorry to keep you waiting.
347
00:18:30,500 --> 00:18:32,900
I guess I was just saving
the best for last.
348
00:18:32,800 --> 00:18:35,100
Oh. Robert. stop.
349
00:18:35,000 --> 00:18:37,500
- So what have you been up to?
- Oh. what haven't I been up to?
350
00:18:37,400 --> 00:18:40,000
Beijing. Bora Bora. Budapest--
351
00:18:39,900 --> 00:18:42,400
oh. by the way.
Curtis and Denise send their love.
352
00:18:42,300 --> 00:18:45,300
They thought
the Steuben menorah
353
00:18:45,100 --> 00:18:48,300
was fabulous!
And I must say I agree.
354
00:18:48,200 --> 00:18:50,700
Oh, Helena, you always
say the right thing.
355
00:18:50,600 --> 00:18:54,100
And you must be Grace Adler? Did you
have any trouble finding the place?
356
00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:58,000
She eats tacos!
357
00:18:59,000 --> 00:19:00,900
Lots of tacos!
358
00:19:00,900 --> 00:19:04,500
Big. honking. greasy ones
with extra cheese and guac.
359
00:19:04,300 --> 00:19:06,600
and they drip on her fancy clothes.
She thinks no one knows.
360
00:19:06,500 --> 00:19:10,300
but-- ( laughs )
Oh. they know. all right! Yeah!
361
00:19:10,200 --> 00:19:14,200
Miss Snooty Pants is
a taco eater!
362
00:19:15,900 --> 00:19:18,900
So now who do you wanna hire?
363
00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:22,800
Well. I don't know.
Let me see your book.
364
00:19:26,700 --> 00:19:30,700
Book?
365
00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:35,100
Listen. honey. I know you're feeling
a little down about what happened.
366
00:19:35,000 --> 00:19:38,700
- but. hey. Iook on the bright side.
- What bright side?
367
00:19:38,500 --> 00:19:42,500
Well. It's just
an expression. honey!
368
00:19:44,800 --> 00:19:47,600
I can't believe it.
369
00:19:47,500 --> 00:19:49,500
I made a fool of myself.
370
00:19:49,400 --> 00:19:51,600
I forgot my book.
371
00:19:51,500 --> 00:19:54,300
I blew a job.
372
00:19:54,200 --> 00:19:58,200
My God. this is the best
freaking taco I've ever had.
373
00:19:59,900 --> 00:20:03,000
Grace. darling. that was a delicious
performance you gave today.
374
00:20:02,900 --> 00:20:06,200
So delicious in fact.
that I've decided to pick up your tab.
375
00:20:06,100 --> 00:20:07,800
Thanks.
especially since it was
376
00:20:07,700 --> 00:20:11,100
Iike $2.50 for the both of us.
377
00:20:10,900 --> 00:20:14,900
- Anastasia.
- Endora.
378
00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:24,000
Hey. mon fr�re.
if your derri�re...
379
00:20:25,200 --> 00:20:29,200
Could use a little cush
380
00:20:30,700 --> 00:20:34,700
- No need to pout
- The word is out
381
00:20:34,700 --> 00:20:37,400
It's Jack's Subway Tush!
382
00:20:37,300 --> 00:20:39,300
I really mean it
383
00:20:39,200 --> 00:20:42,400
It's Jack's Subway Tush!
384
00:20:42,300 --> 00:20:43,800
I'll tell ya. Daddy
385
00:20:43,700 --> 00:20:47,700
It's Jack's Subway Tush!
386
00:20:50,400 --> 00:20:53,300
Get out.
387
00:20:53,100 --> 00:20:56,700
- For real?
- ( laughs ) Yeah. get out.
388
00:20:56,600 --> 00:21:00,600
( theme music playing )
0
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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