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Thank you.
The tradition of our sisterhood at Phi Gamma Kappa goes back to the days when
cotton was king.
And just as it has been for generation after generation, the friendships you
have so lovingly cultivated and nourished here will remain amongst the
treasured possessions of your life.
Through times of happiness,
and times of sadness, good fortune, and tribulation.
You will always remember this time together.
You are at a crossroads, a junction in your lives.
May the road you travel speed you toward your dreams and goals with no sudden
curve or detour to divert you from your path.
For those of you who are graduating, this is your farewell.
This is a dream come true for me, baby.
From the moment I first laid my eyes on you when we were freshmen, I knew that
one day you'd be my wife.
And this is just the beginning.
I've got it all planned out.
What I wanted to make you happy.
What I wanted to give you everything your little heart desires.
What I want, Chad.
is to run away to a tropical island somewhere and live in a grass hut.
Eat coconuts for the rest of our lives?
Coconuts and mangoes and papayas.
Don't do this to me, baby. You're driving me nuts.
That's the idea, Chad.
A hell of a shot, son.
You know, if your daddy and I weren't so keen on you becoming a lawyer, I swear
I'd sponsor you on the pro tour.
Well, Senator, I like things to work.
I like them nice and neat.
These days you're gonna hook a shot, son. You're gonna get stuck in the
And that's gonna give you character.
And I mean that with all best intentions.
Thank you.
Yeah, who do you love?
We really should go home.
One more time. It's so much fun.
I'll get them off for you, miss.
I used to be a goddamn elephant tamer. Kyle, leave him be. Move out of the way.
He's on the house.
How about you, princess?
You want to take a spin?
I'm not a princess.
I knew a real one once.
She was from the Sudan. Her daddy was king for a day.
You better do what he says, ma 'am.
Because if you don't, he's just going to hold your kin for custody till you do.
I'd really rather not.
Come on, April. One more time. It's so fun. You'll love it. April?
I've known a May and a June, but never an April.
I wish I could say something to persuade you to get on that ride, ma 'am. Wipe
the seat off for the princess, Kyle. That'll make her feel better.
If not for him, then for me.
My blood pressure's high. My heart's weak.
My days are numbered. There's only so much more a man my age can do.
Come on, girls. We're going home now.
Could you please let them out?
Don't move, Speed.
My pleasure. Kyle, you tried hard, but you can't win them all.
Round one goes to the triplets.
Like you girls, he usually doesn't back down so easy.
Who's this good -looking devil, April?
Is he your husband?
Not yet. Two more weeks.
Choo -choo. What kind of name is that?
His real name's Chad. She just calls him Choo -choo.
Mad, my Lollapalooza. You bet, Opal. Sure thing.
Anything you say.
Hey, Choo -choo.
I'm going to wish you the best.
Now you say hello to your mommy and daddy for me.
Tell your daddy I'm looking forward to having a special dance with him at the
wedding.
Come on, let's go for a ride. Get a motel room or something.
What do you say?
We're going to have the whole rest of our lives together.
You drive me crazy.
You.
I'm never sure about you. I never know what you want.
It won't be long now.
What's she got on her mind?
Why are you following me?
What's gotten into you?
How's it doing? You want to come with me?
What kind of new girls want to come with me?
You better use it while you got it, because it ain't my last breath.
Smiley fuck.
Sons of bitches. One of these days, this whole carnival is going to come down
around you if you don't start putting some money back into it.
You got to spend money to make money.
Now, fuck your pay.
That's good, Smiley.
Fuck you covers just about everything.
I pay for that, dear.
Don't be so goddamn stingy, Buck. What goes around comes around. The more you
give, the more you get. The cup's half full, half empty.
Reality's called, and how you proceed.
Isn't that right, pal?
Oh, everything is saved right, Perry.
If you ain't the most beautiful bastard I ever seen, I don't know who is.
God,
I love you, Perry.
You got it all, kid.
You're an angel, you're a saint, you're a cowboy, you're an Indian. You're the
devil sent here to keep us all honest with ourselves.
He's in.
Devil in here.
Yeah, you taught him.
Looking.
Remember me?
The man who returned your wallet?
Aren't you going to talk to me?
You know the first thing I thought about when I saw you?
I really did think that, you know, hopes had better work for it.
That you were out here looking for me.
Are you?
I couldn't sleep.
I know you've got a lot of things on your mind.
With the wedding coming up.
Everything.
I can understand.
So.
What we say all the night.
Night.
Night.
Let's go, young 'uns.
You sure you don't want to come along with us, darling? I hate leaving you
all alone.
Oh, I'd rather not, Dad. It's just the weekend.
Besides, I have so much to do yet before the wedding.
You take it easy, honey.
I will. Maybe I'll take a swim at the club.
That's a good idea.
Bye.
If Jesse calls, make sure to give him our number at the lake.
Don't you worry, honey.
Have a good time.
Bye. Bye.
Bye, April.
We'll be going now, Miss April.
Thanks, Jimmy.
Looking forward to a big day.
Those gardenias your mom and I planted are special.
For your bouquet.
They're lovely, Jimmy. You make sure and take some home for yourself.
Thank you, my dear.
Bye. Bye -bye.
I want you to get out of my house.
Do you hear me?
Yes, ma 'am. I'm sorry.
We mean the inconvenience here. It's just that I needed a nice hot shower. It
sure is nice smelling soap.
I'm warning you.
No wonder women smell so good. What is it? Essence of lilac? I want you to
this house immediately or I'm going to call the police.
No, ma 'am. I don't think you will.
I chanced meeting last night colluding into you.
Is this Baxter drawing my hair at all?
I don't care about your hair. Just get your dog and go.
How can I do that? When it says right here on the bottle, wait three minutes
after conditioning. Your hair will be unmanaged.
If you got any ideas about going near that phone, I might just take it upon
myself to walk out in front lawn.
Network. There at network.
You wouldn't want that, would you?
It's a beautiful day, isn't it?
You had your chance, but you didn't run away, did you?
No, I didn't.
And you didn't call the police, either?
No, I didn't.
Why not?
Do you suppose?
I hope you don't mind, but I helped myself to a bottle of champagne.
I usually try not to drink during the day, but this being a special occasion,
think about it.
You frighten me.
I understand.
I'm sorry I had to come into your house like this, but...
Since I'm only going to be in town a day or so, that doesn't give us much time.
And I knew you wouldn't mind.
Let's go over there.
Sit on the couch.
And get to know one another.
You're the cockiest son of a bitch I've ever met in my life. Not really.
I just like to hear myself talk.
And I like beautiful things.
A woman like you comes along only once in a lifetime.
Bullshit. I swear.
When I leave, I'd like
you to give me a bottle of your perfume as I'm driving from town to town.
bringing up to my nose and every time.
You smell so good.
I can't keep my hands off of you. I was going to come and just have a shower, a
nice hot cup of coffee, but you excite me so much I can't help myself.
Like this has ever happened to me.
There it is.
I went to a store in the Mojave, California.
The man there taught me how to use one of these.
I wasn't sure I was going to buy one.
He told me he shot a video of his wife playing with herself.
Can you imagine that? A total stranger telling me something like that.
There you are on TV.
How about a little smile?
You don't feel like smiling.
I can understand that.
Well, April, darling, I didn't just show up here by mistake.
You invited me.
You might not know it, but you did.
It's all right there in your eyes.
It's me, baby.
I just spoke to the real estate agent in Tuscaloosa.
The condo is ours.
Congratulations.
I'm going to stay up here a few more days, lock things down, make sure
everything's perfect when we get here, okay?
I love you, baby.
Big kiss.
Let me look at you.
You're going to be the pretty bridesmaid since your grandma walked down the
staircase on her daddy's arm.
We got that photograph of you and that handsome bow of yours just dancing away
at the sorority ball.
Wait a minute. Belle.
Belle, got a surprise for you.
Look who comes to visit.
Well, I can see.
April, honey.
How wonderful of you to come out all this way just to see us.
Are those flowers for me?
Do I smell freezers?
My favorite.
Stop and pick some fresh on the way over.
How thoughtful of you.
I watched you drive in. I see your daddy bought you a new car for graduation.
It's for graduation and the wedding, Val.
Chad's parents bought him one, too, only his is red.
I can still see that Lincoln convertible.
that Belle's daddy bought for her graduation.
It was white, and it had the softest tan leather upholstery you ever
laid your eyes on.
April, you turned out to be a beautiful young woman.
Belle and I are so proud of you.
Thank you.
Well, come here and tell me, Charles.
Have you tamed Chad yet?
And don't you do it, either.
Just keep him wild as long as you can.
You're incorrigible, Grandma.
Well, now, don't you grandma me, April.
You know very well what I'm talking about, too.
I've been watching you at parties and with boys ever since you were a little
girl, and I might say you come by it naturally.
I know I seem so sure of myself.
Sometimes... I get this feeling inside, Belle.
I'm so scared.
I really find that hard to believe, April.
When I was your age, I was expecting a baby.
That was the year my father died and everything fell on my shoulders.
And your grandfather, rest his soul, he wasn't much help to me.
But he was the most handsome and virile man in the county.
And every woman that set her eyes on him wanted him.
So, I disciplined myself to play the cards that life dealt me.
You never had second thoughts.
Oh, April, second thoughts are a luxury I've never afforded myself.
And neither should you.
It's just everything's moving so fast.
I feel...
Delilah, if my mom or anyone else calls, could you tell them I'm here, please,
but then I'm out taking a walk or something?
I just don't feel like going home this year.
April, I don't know if your father told you, but I'm arranging for you to have
this house after I'm gone.
This house and the property from here to Two Moon Junction.
I don't know what to say.
Well, there'll be a trust to take care of the taxes and general maintenance,
all I need you to do is to make sure that when your time comes, you see that
stays in the family.
Can you do that for me, April?
Of course.
And I also want to say how proud I am that you've chosen to wear my wedding
dress.
You deserve it.
Earl, it's Belle.
Belle! How are you, sugar?
I'd like you to do a little something for me.
No problem.
I'll keep an eye on her.
Remember, save me a dance at that wedding.
Excuse me.
You're welcome, wagon.
I'm looking for the other man.
What other man?
Look, I'm the only man. I'm the last one left. The rest of them are gone.
I find me a good woman. I'm going, too.
The other man, Perry.
Do you know where he is?
Oh, yeah.
Do you know he got run over by a train and lost both his legs?
He died this morning.
You guys have a certain charm about them when it's not like this.
What are you gonna do, you know?
I think they'll get the fun of it.
I know.
Go on, keep your company.
I swear to God, I can't stand them when they get drunk. And believe me, I have
learned that you never want to mess with them when they get that way.
You just got to ride it out until it passes.
Besides, with most of them, they ain't drunk to dull and hell.
I'm glad you came along, though, because you started driving me crazy.
You got a cigarette?
Because I left mine in my purse back there.
I don't smoke.
Fucking dickhead!
God, I wish I had that kind of discipline.
You know, I tried to quit once, and I thought, what the fuck, I'm going to die
sooner or later anyway, you know?
Hey, what did you say your name was? Is your name April?
Yes! I knew it.
You're the one that's about to be married, right?
Perry told me all about you the first time we met.
I'm Patty Jean. Hang on.
Did that son of a bitch make you take an AIDS test before he fucked you?
I didn't think so.
He said it wasn't because he was afraid of dying.
He just didn't want to be spreading the disease indiscriminately on down the
line. Personally, if you ask me, I think he just didn't want to die having
people think he was gay.
Because he's pretty enough to give that impression.
Oh, you're kind of humiliating me.
You want to really talk about humiliating?
I know this girl who flies with Savannah, and she told me that when
on airplanes, what they do is they lock them in the fucking bathroom until they
land. Now I ask you, if that ain't the ultimate humiliation, what is? Ending up
your life on a toilet seat, 35 ,000 feet in the air, you know? Shit!
Hang on.
My secret.
I put a little rouge on it.
Makes it easier to see through my blouse.
It's a real sexy thing to do, but I think it's cute.
Boys would just hell when I wore pink Ingor sweaters in junior high.
I love Ingor.
You ever put yours in the refrigerator?
No. Makes it real fuzzy.
I bet you got great tits.
I can tell.
But you shouldn't cover them up or be ashamed of them.
And your hair would look a hell of a lot sexier if you'd wet it and slick it
back. I mean, I should know. I'm a hairdresser. I know what the fuck I'm
about. If I do one, I do 30 makeovers a week.
And that top would look so much better if you weren't wearing a bra.
Want to let me try it on?
What?
I'll shut the door.
Come on, let me try it on.
Okay.
That's nice.
You want to try on mine?
Come on, I designed it myself. It'll look so cute on you. You've got the
figure for it.
Perfect.
Oh, Connor, don't be shy.
Just put it on and say goodbye to Princess.
Sorry.
Look, I know it would look good on you, and I'm not going to take no for an
answer.
Come on, Perry will love it.
Looks good, doesn't it?
At moments like this, I can see why guys like women so much.
So hot the first time.
I thought I was going to go through the ceiling.
The lady's got a secret, don't you?
I ain't got no secret.
I ain't got nothing except a bike, a truck, a post office box
in Clearwater, Florida.
So what color is your living room?
White.
But it's not my house, it's my parents.
Is your bedroom white too?
Beige and floral print.
My whole place is wood panel.
I never lived in anything else but.
Except when I lived in Vegas.
I was married to this guy in the airport.
And they put us up in this place that was great.
A prefab with a balcony.
You want to dance?
No. Come on, we're here. Let's have fun.
It's my favorite song.
And you're going to dance with me now.
I'm taking a bus out of here in the morning.
I don't know where I'm going, but I can't wait to get there.
Bye.
Delilah, it's me, April.
April, honey?
Where are you from?
Puerto Rico.
Is that his sister?
No, no.
Cousin?
No. Es amiga.
Amiga.
Can you ask your friend why she's not wearing any underwear?
She said
that
she washed them last night and they're not dry enough to wear this morning.
She only got one pair?
It's barely even cold. You're already trying to get someone else into it. Oh,
what the hell? If you're as long as the room's paid for, I might as well get my
money's worth.
You hollow, manipulative piece of shit.
Everything you are is between your legs.
Well, then, why don't you come over here and give me a kiss good morning?
What the hell am I doing here?
A bus, baby.
Yeah, there's no mistake in it.
What's happened to Ava when she's come face to face with her libido?
Buster, I don't have to take this shit.
I bet you didn't think I knew what that word meant, but I do.
Libido.
Unchecked desire.
Who the fuck do you think you are? You come to my house.
It's better than being hysterical. You lose, mister. You're all alone. You
care about anybody, and nobody gives a shit about you. That's right, baby. I'm
the Phantom of the Night.
the servants folks but you got to admit that's one special wacko chick
I'm
gonna buy you breakfast asshole
You know, I have a grandmother that I'm sure was about the hottest thing on the
planet.
There was a time every Saturday night, and they'd dress up in tuxedos and
and I'll go down to our pavilion at Two Moon Junction and dance all night long.
Two Moon Junction? Yeah.
That's my favorite place in all the world.
My great -great -granddaddy was a pirate, you know.
Really? Yeah, he and Lafitte and a bunch of the others got very pissed off at
the slave traders and started raiding their ships and setting all the slaves
free in South America.
My grandmother says it was because they had this dream of America being the last
bastion of freedom.
But then they realized the problem was bigger than they were and they really
couldn't do anything about it. So they settled down the land and started
cotton. and put the slaves to work on the plantation.
My grandmother says he did it because he finally came to understand there would
never be heaven on Earth.
For as long as the Earth turns, there's always going to be corruption. Nothing
was ever going to be perfect.
What do you mean to say there was more money in cotton than in being a hero?
Something like that.
You're going to make a hell of a lawyer, sweetheart.
I expect to live a double life.
Maybe even a triple one if I get lucky.
Yeah, I thought you were just another tight -ass princess.
You look like a princess.
You talk like a princess.
And you definitely have a tight ass.
Darling.
Excuse me, son.
Is that your rig parked over there at Malcolm's place?
Well, there they be, son.
Jonah and Jonah Jr.
There's old they can't remember who's pappy and whose son They're weird and
full of superstition Burying a dead animal on their land could cause the
give bloody milk ring on a swarm of locusts I
Told this boy here if he dig up his animal I might be able to sway view to
drop charges against him You see, it was dark, and he wanted a nice place to put
his animal to rest.
He didn't know he was trespassing, and he saw it.
Do yourself a favor, son.
Love my dog.
The song they're singing goes way back. It's a kind of prayer.
So, where'd you say you hail from, son?
East.
Anywhere near Cambridge, Massachusetts?
No, sir.
My grandson's going up there this fall to Harvard Law School.
Wish him luck.
We're talking about $32 ,000 a year tuition, room, and board.
But it ain't going to cost me a penny, no siree, because, thank the Lord, we
people around here who recognize and support outstanding achievement.
You know who Little Richard is, don't you?
Sure.
I remember he used to ride around here in his Cadillac, always raising Billy
hell.
Got so bad, finally the judge had to throw his black ass out of the county
told him never to come back.
What I'm trying to say, son, is that
not much goes on in this county that I don't know about.
Did you get your manicure?
You look absolutely beautiful.
Jenny, you have done a wonderful job on the dress. Thank you so much.
You know, Alice in Wonderland's always been my favorite story.
I would have dreamed of having a storybook wedding and now I am.
Wow,
pretty exciting isn't it?
I just love these dresses. They make us all look so good.
Makes your tits look bigger this way.
If you don't mind, April, honey, I'm planning on using these kind of dresses
my wedding.
If I ever get married, which I probably won't, but if I do, these types of
dresses would be nice.
You're welcome to it, sugar pie. I won't be needing it after tomorrow.
Besides, next time I get married, I'm going to run off to Las Vegas and do it
a hot tub.
April, bite your tongue.
Carolee, honey.
Could you give us a moment alone, baby?
This is going to be a wonderful wedding. I can't wait.
Honey, so little time.
And I thought, well, I thought since you and Chad are still going to school, I
figured you're not counting on having a family right away.
So I took the liberty of putting together this little family
for you.
You know, there's a lot of things here, and I, there's so much, and I don't know
what you would use, but what do you think?
Well, honey, I don't know what you know.
You never really talked.
Oh, April, I'm happy.
It's a long three, but if you have to see this, come with me.
Come on.
have found your wallet tomorrow
What's going on here? No idea.
Afternoon, Beth.
Hi,
Grandma. Oh, you beautiful girls. You're getting more beautiful every time I see
you.
Aren't they turning into lovely young ladies, Delilah?
Oh, yes, they are. They certainly are. Is that any way for the future Mrs.
Douglas Fairchild, to be dressed the day before her wedding?
You've been having fittings all day, Belle. Oh, you poor thing.
What is that monstrosity?
It's a tent, Belle.
Well, I can see that.
Whatever does your mother have in mind?
It's for the buffet.
Looks more like a circus to me.
Girls, would you please take these cold drinks out to those poor hard -working
boys out there?
Beautiful, Belle.
Oh, thank you, dear.
What about me?
That goes without saying to my heart.
I told you it was him. It is him. It is him.
He's never been the cutest girl he's seen online.
Come on.
He's just gorgeous.
You know, it used to be that I knew the Christian name of every day worker in
the county.
Nowadays, you just open the yellow pages and dial a number and you take your
chances with the riffraff.
You know, Delilah and I contemplating carrying pistols in our pocketbooks.
that the truth?
Not only is that tent an eyesore, it's a potential hazard.
Young man?
Young man?
Young man, can't you do something about those guy lines? Somebody's bound to
trip on that and break their neck.
I think this will solve your problem.
Oh, and by the way, that's a beautiful outfit you're wearing.
The finest of imported silk pongee, the likes of which I haven't seen since
Mademoiselle ran that layout on Princess Di's truce.
You're pushing your luck, aren't you, young man?
I'm just trying to earn a living, ma 'am.
Minimum wage, $3 .35 an hour.
It's not much, but I can make it work.
You know, there's a line. Of course there is. That's what holds up the tent.
Well, that's not the line I'm referring to.
The line I'm talking about is the line between good manners and bad manners.
Order and chaos.
Cross that line. If you're talking about the state line, that's where I see it.
They're placed settings the 36 April darling Taken from the court of King
and handed down from eldest daughter to eldest daughter every other generation
from the time our forefathers decided to legitimize themselves and
Join a civilized society Well since that time the DeLong Pre family can claim
three governors
two United States senators, three electives of the House of
Supreme Court justice, and an ambassador to Chile.
And at our table, we've had the likes of General Patton, President
Woodrow Wilson, Jimmy Carter, Lyndon Johnson, the actress
Tallulah Bankhead, and...
Truman Capote and that film star, Grace Kelly, before she married her prince.
And Betty Ford after her rehabilitation.
Come election time, where do our Yankee brothers come to court but here?
But where the South goes, so goes the presidency.
And why is that?
Because we here in the South take care of our own.
Always have, always will.
Perry? Perry?
Perry, please come out. I don't have much time.
I said to myself, if she comes here and she's wearing high -heeled shoes, then
she's come because she wanted to come.
There's almost $5 ,000 here.
Please take it and go away.
I saw your fiancรฉe today. I love that song you were singing.
You showed good taste there.
I bet you his friends are giving him one of those stag parties tonight.
Say if I'm right.
I'm leaving now. If you don't want the money, give it to charity.
Keep your money.
How come you aren't wearing any panties, April, darling?
What kind of a way is that to come see somebody you don't want to see?
I know. Don't tell me.
You washed them out before you went to bed, and they're not dry yet.
You know, you're a real son of a bitch.
At first, you excited me.
Now you repulse me.
You've got no mystery.
Everything you are... ...is between my legs.
Crazy. I've run a million miles.
Who should I fall in love with?
The very girl I was running away from.
You're lying.
You lie about everything.
Am I?
I want to show you something.
To the merging of two great southern families.
Good luck to you, Chad. May God bless you.
His name's Max.
I was going to
call him Tom, too, but I figured he needed his own identity.
It's beautiful.
I was thinking about giving you one for your wedding present, but then I figured
it would be kind of hard for you to explain.
My cousins and I used to come here all the time when we were kids.
We did everything together.
In the summertime, we used to sneak around at night and watch our parents
love.
Then we'd come in here, strip down, touch each other all over.
And one night after a party, they both got crazy drunk, took their father's
Lincoln Continental and crashed it into a telephone pole.
Timothy, the one who was driving, lived.
But Charles died.
Two months later, Timmy put a gun to his head and shot himself out of despair.
You remind me of that.
I used to play this game, my cousins and I.
They'd blindfold me, trying to guess which one of them I was with.
I'm not your cousin.
What cousin?
What do you want?
What time's the wedding?
Noon.
Wait around till then.
See what happens.
It's vocal.
Come on, kiddo. We're on.
Darling, is something wrong?
Darling?
What's the matter?
I need a minute.
You look so beautiful.
We're so proud of you.
Belle, I don't know if I can do this.
But we love you.
And we only want what's best for you.
Yeah, what's going on? You may be about to get some character.
No, no, just a little hold up. Don't worry about a thing.
If you all just hold on a minute, I don't know, the bride's got a wrinkle in
dress or something. You know how these things are.
Now, don't anybody go away.
I won't let you throw your life away on a passing fancy.
Passion fades.
Believe me, I know.
I'm afraid this would happen.
He will never interfere with your life again.
Belle, what did you do?
Belle.
He asked me for money.
I gave it to him.
That's not true.
He would never take money.
April, my beautiful, courageous child.
Have I ever lied to you?
I'm going to put you down and you're running around.
Maybe you don't realize I'm even weak.
You should change your way.
I'm sorry, sir. I didn't mean to inconvenience you. It's just that I was
neighborhood. I needed a nice hot shower.
It sure is nice smelling, so...
A pretty girl, a pretty girl can walk anywhere.
All doors open for her.
Like a breath of fresh air, her beauty is perceived.
Wrapped in her beauty, everywhere she is welcome.
First class on the plane, closed door of the club.
All faces turn, all faces turn.
They come along with a desire to perpet.
Nothing can interfere with a dream, a dream so
near.
And when she caught my eye, we were those for whom the
rules do not apply.
Pretty girl, young man, old man, man with a gun, two people alone.
The rules do not apply.
Pretty girl, young man, old man, never the gun. Two people in love.
The rules do not apply.
Two people in love.
I'm a liar, a high liar.
She likes to balance on a knife.
She says.
I'm the wire that is living.
Oh, you can forget the rest.
I'm the wire that is living.
Each step must be in place.
So don't look down.
One ball move, it ball it hang.
We'd rather risk it all, or roll the dice and let them fall.
They say we can't survive, but a life like this keeps me alive.
Doesn't matter where we are, I still say the rules.
Do not apply.
I've had a pretty girl, young man, old man, man with a gun, two people in love.
The rules do not apply.
Pretty girl, young man, old man, man with a gun,
two people in love.
The rules do not apply.
with a gun.
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