Original subtitles

I want to go to paradise, where the girls all look so nice.

They can come from the east or the west, but I know where they look the best.

I want to go to paradise, to fall in love just once or twice.

Nothing's gonna take me away, cause paradise is where I'll stay.

Every day you have the sun keep shining, not a cloud up in the sky.

Everywhere love could be hiding, all you know is you gotta try.

If this could last forever, gotta be a dream.

I want a door to paradise, where the girls all look so nice.

They can come from the east or the west, but I know where to look the best.

I want to go to paradise, fall in love just once or twice.

Nothing's gonna take me away, cause paradise is where I'll stay.

Now if you think you're ready for something, and you're tired of...

We might get lucky.

Find the feeling love can bring.

Wish that this could last forever.

It's gotta be a dream.

Oh, I want you for a paradise.

Where the girls all look so nice.

Take me home from the east old west. But no.

Love just once or twice.

Love is gonna take you away. Cause paradise is where I'll stay.

Paradise is where I'll stay.

the wheel for me, please?

Thanks.

Just let me off wherever you're going.

Paradise Beach.

Our girlfriend Sarah's invited us out to spend a couple weeks at her uncle's

beach place.

Sounds nice.

Sounds great.

hitting the Southland beaches.

What's up, Taylor?

What's your name, Taylor?

Randy Captain Blythe, sir.

Well, straighten up.

They're on duty here, and I run a torch ship.

Aye, aye, Captain Blythe.

Grab the captain's balls.

What are you fools doing?

I demand a military bearing in my men.

Dower.

Captain Jack and his filthy crew.

They've left Mexico with yet another load of the demon weed.

They'll be within our waters tonight.

Every man is to stand prepared.

Break out the boats and lower the cannons.

Yes, sir.

Dismissed. Excuse me. Excuse me, Captain Bly, sir.

I love a man in a uniform.

So you're just bumming around the country sleeping in the woods, huh? I

to call it traveling light.

Where do I stop for the night?

How about staying with us? We could spend the night. Right, Ginger?

Well, we could ask Sarah.

I'm sure she'll say it's okay.

I don't want to barge in.

Don't sweat it.

Sarah's cool.

Scott Daniels.

Oh? The girls gave me a lift.

Oh.

I brought in your groceries for you.

Thanks.

You left them in the car.

Oh.

I washed it up with the ketchup.

Oh, Sarah.

Scott here is tripping around the country, and you thought maybe he'd

for tonight?

Yeah, I guess so.

getting sunburned.

Are you?

Harlan, use the stairs.

Thanks for helping me put the groceries away.

Sure.

Whenever there's work to be done, Ginger and Ducky always seem to disappear.

Hey, how about taking a walk on the beach?

You're quite different from your friends.

Ginger and Ducky?

Aren't they beautiful?

Yeah, they're okay looking.

They're a knockout.

They're the most popular girls in the school.

I can understand that, all right.

I never would have thought they'd come all the way out here with me, though.

Why not?

They could have gone just about anywhere they wanted to. The river, the

mountains, where the boys are.

I don't know how they could do any better than being here with you.

Do you really think that?

Absolutely.

What a place!

What are we waiting for?

Let's have a party!

Come on, we've got to go in and get ready.

Sure could use a boy or two.

Well, we can get the booze over the phone.

But the boys?

We can get them the same way.

Hey, what's going on?

Ginger's gonna order us some boys.

How?

In the yellow pages.

Hello, pizza man.

Howdy.

Pizza.

That'll be $7 .83.

What's on it? Oh, everything, just like you ordered.

Pepperoni, onion, green pepper, sausage, anchovy, salami.

Is that a salami in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?

It's a salami.

I will do.

Ginger, I'm not sure this is such a good idea.

What do you mean?

We deserve a party.

We need a party.

I just don't know about this.

School's out now. It's time to have some fun, you know?

Ginger, I'm just afraid... As usual.

Oh, Sarah, we're not going to have an orgy.

It's just a little party.

Don't get carried away.

Hello, Clem's TV?

Do you have a repairman you could send out?

Is he cute?

We do.

But then recently they call Minneapolis, you know, the Twin Cities.

Must have called a pound.

Yeah, you take over and I'll call car for some liquid.

Told me to plumb his daughter, but you gave my tool a wrench.

Didn't you feel that? I thought it was him.

Ginger!

There's a guy and a girl in the bathroom together.

Yeah? And they're doing it.

How do you know? I saw them.

Well, maybe they're washing each other's backs.

Ginger, I'm not stupid.

No, but you are uptight. You'll get over it.

Willie's One Stop?

Do you deliver?

Oh, great.

Um, what does your delivery boy look like?

Yeah?

old is he?

Perfect.

Oh, just so we'll know what he looks like when he comes.

Right, that'll be five cases of peach tipple and five cases of beer.

No, you better make that six cases.

as possible.

Carl Purdue?

Uh, yes, this is she.

Uh, yes, right away.

Who's Julie?

She's my Uncle Carl's fiancé. Why?

Yes? Miss Carmody, this here is Willie One Stop out of Paradise Beach.

Well, someone out of Carl Purdue's place just put in an order, and I, uh... Oh,

that's his niece.

She's staying out there for the summer.

So, why are you bothering me?

I tried to get a hold of Mr.

Perdue, but he wasn't in his office.

He's at a construction site.

Look, what's your problem, Mr.

Willie? I just thought, well, it's quite a good size order.

But if you say it's okay, I'm sorry to bother you.

Yes, Julie.

How are you?

Yeah?

Okay.

Okay, listen, this is the last one.

I won't delay any longer.

For sure.

We get married in September, the 15th, 8 in the morning. Okay now?

Oh, that must be Sarah and her friends. I wouldn't worry about it. They're kids.

It's summer.

They're allowed to let off some steam.

Julie, I'll take care of it.

Please don't press it as soon as I get back.

Okay.

I love you.

Bye -bye.

I went to trouble when they get into.

When I was their age.

Problem.

All right.

What's the party for?

I don't know.

It's pointing the wrong way.

What's so interesting over at the Purdue place?

Oh! Oh!

Oh, Lord.

Something's happening over there, and I don't think Carl Purdue knows anything

about it. I'm calling the police.

I don't seem to like parties that much.

Besides, I've been that route.

So what's next?

What's next?

Yeah. What are you going to do? Just bum around the country?

Well, I guess I'll try to find something that has meaning to me and then go

after it.

That could take the rest of your life.

Yeah, I guess it can.

I don't know.

One thing I got is patience.

You can't wait forever.

Maybe not.

Until I figure out what it is I want, I don't have any way to go after it.

How about you?

Got it all laid out, I bet.

Why not?

Next fall, I start UCLA pre -law.

Then a couple years of law school.

Maybe join up with a good firm for a couple of years.

Specializing. Oh, whoa, what is that, eight, ten years there?

What if you get that far and find out you don't like being a lawyer?

I don't plan to not like being a lawyer.

You're programming yourself just like a computer.

Well, what's wrong with that?

Nothing if you happen to be a computer.

You're a real, live human being.

So?

So follow your impulses once in a while.

Be human.

Like Ginger and Ducky? No, not like Ginger and Ducky.

Like you, I suppose.

Well, it could do worse.

What's your name, sweetie?

Jay.

Jay Hammond.

Now, ma 'am, we have a neighbor who has a complaint. You're kind of young to be

a cop.

Well, I'm just a reservist. It's a bummer job.

My dad's the chief.

I go to Southern Cal the rest of the year.

Now, about the complaint. Go come in. Join the party.

You know, me and Ducky, we're going to Southern Cal this fall.

Oh, yeah?

No, I'm on duty.

Now, about the complaint.

Relax. I want to show you a ducky.

A ducky?

That's a ducky.

That's a ducky. The brunette.

But

about

the complaint. What are you studying in school? Are you going to be a cop like

your daddy?

No, I...

specializing in that. In what?

I'm your lover, and there's a way that I can do it.

Oh, I'm your lover, and I see everything I see in you.

Oh, I'm your lover, and I'm your lover, and

I see everything I see in you.

Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose.

You still gotta play the game.

Luck to find you late at night, but it's hard to remember his name.

How come you aren't down with the rest of them?

Oh, I can't swim.

You can't either?

I can swim.

Oh.

You think I'm a prude too, don't you? Oh, no, I don't.

You're just fine.

Maybe if you'd, you know, let go a little more now and then and try to

life.

But you're going to be just okay.

Honest.

Shoot, if I had your face and figure, honey, I'd never be wearing clothes.

Thanks, Doreen.

Paradise Beach.

Probably some kids told some marshmallows.

Raider just picked up a boat heading this way from port. It looks like a

sir. Bly, how far?

Oh, it's fast, sir.

How fast?

Real fast.

About 15 minutes.

It's hot, sir. Damn.

Okay, Bly, but not this time.

All right, quick.

Dump. Jettison the cargo.

Jettison the cargo. All of it. All of it. Send us over the side. Quick trip to

sea. So, wait.

Can we just keep a kilo?

Not even a lid. Quick.

Stop it all!

I met a girl from South Carolina.

What's that mean? She moved to China.

I knew a guy, his name is Chuck.

I knew a girl from Chula Vista.

We did it so much, I got a...

I am the pizza delivery boy.

Sarah. Uncle Carl.

What am I going to do with you?

I'm not

angry. Surprised, yes.

I just didn't think you were the kind of girl to take advantage of a situation

like this.

I'm sorry, Uncle Carl. It's just not like you.

Did your friends Cinnamon and Goosey... Ginger and Ducky.

Yes, them.

All this, it's their doing, isn't it?

Not entirely.

Well, it doesn't matter. We've got to put a stop to it.

Honey, I have neighbors here, a position in the community. I just can't allow

this.

I'll tell everyone to leave.

I'm no Scrooge.

Let them have fun tonight.

But tomorrow, everyone, including your two friends... Ginger and Ducky.

Whatever. Tomorrow they go, and you and I have a talk.

Yes, Uncle Carl.

Right.

Come on.

Let's see if I have a bed for the night.

God, I need a shower.

Maybe a sauna.

Come on.

What a drag!

There goes our whole summer.

It's not fair.

Yeah, he sure didn't look like an old fuddy -duddy. In fact, he was kind of

cute. Really?

I bet if he'd gotten to know her, he wouldn't have been so mean.

Ducky, that's it!

Huh? We get to know Uncle Carl.

Real friendly -like, you know?

I think we can change his mind.

Wait a minute. Let me get my bearings.

Sir, north is in that direction. Idiot.

Sir, we didn't actually catch Captain Jack.

Captain Jack.

Meet again.

You're playing it tough, eh?

I admire your spirit, Captain Jack.

I can say this for you. You got balls like me.

But I don't play with mine all the time.

Oh, smart guy, huh?

Well, not smart enough. Not for old Bly.

We got you cold and you're gonna pay.

I wouldn't be surprised if they lock you away for life for this one. Captain?

Yeah. There's a lot of smart guys like you out there.

But it takes only one good, clean -living American like me to put an end

and your filthy trade. Captain. Yeah, you've buttered your bread.

And now you're gonna sleep in it. Captain. Quiet, Gower.

Want to give this sea scum a little peace of mind? A little mind? Yeah.

Now, we commend that you can con, but not me.

I'm too honest, too clean, too slow.

What? Slow.

His ship is clean. He must have dumped it overboard.

What? We didn't get here in time.

Me? He?

Eloquent bastard, ain't he? Aye.

Get him out of here now.

Get him out of here.

I just wanted to get a little peace and quiet.

Yeah, well, me too.

I'm Sarah's friend, Ginger.

Glad to meet you. I'm Sarah's uncle, Carl Perdue.

Glad to meet you.

Well, you'd rather be alone.

I've got some things that I... No, that's all right.

That's the whole idea.

You ever heard of a cold sauna?

I hope you don't blame Sarah too much for the partying going on.

I mean, it really grew.

I guess it's kind of out of hand now.

She should know better than to have let it happen.

She should have.

There's nothing like cold water when you're really hot.

No, there's nothing like it.

It feels so good to sweat.

How old are you?

I said...

How old are you?

Oh, well, I'm older than Sarah.

I'm old enough to know better.

Isn't that what they say?

That's what they say about me.

Oh, you're not so old.

You know, it's hot in here.

Oh, God, I'm really sweating now.

So hot?

Oh, no, I love it.

You look upset.

Bad day at the office?

It's worth it.

Let me give you a back rub.

No, please, no. Thank you.

I'm only trying to help.

What I need is a drink.

Okay, I'll get you one.

No, no.

Besides, we're all out.

I've got just the thing, then.

No thanks, I'm trying to quit.

These aren't cigarettes.

They don't kill you.

They let you live, baby.

You mean... You mean those are... Sure.

Marijuana?

Well, I don't think... No, I don't mess with that.

I thought you were cooler than that.

You did, huh?

I did.

Well, you can't let down a lady, can you?

Sure, loosen up.

There's nothing to get in trouble with in here.

Nothing can go wrong.

Now take a deep breath. Hold it in.

Hold it in.

Get deeper.

That's it.

Why, Ginger, you done wore him out.

Is he dead?

You better call the cops. Where's the phone book?

You are the cops. No, he's not dead.

He just fell asleep.

And that guy works too hard. I give him a little grass, then he's in dreamland.

Help me get him out of here.

I gotta try this again tomorrow.

Uh -uh.

Tomorrow's my turn.

Hit the beach with Wanda.

Super, that.

Hey, you ever push iron?

No, I never got into that.

Oh, you'd like it if you tried it.

I could show you how.

Yeah, I'll bet you could.

And you could teach me how to play the guitar.

I could probably show you a few things.

I've always wanted to learn.

Oh, hey, Sarah.

Scott's going to teach me how to play the guitar.

Yeah.

Hey, you play anything else?

Myself sometimes.

You think I could play something?

Don't ever try the accordion.

waiting for me but love won't you hurry i'm waiting

impatiently

Ginger.

Ducky.

Ginger.

Whoa.

What a night.

I know.

I spent the night in the bathtub because all the beds were full.

World War III.

Oh, God.

Hey, wake up, soldier.

Time to face the world.

You and Ducky?

Yeah.

Oh.

My mouth feels like the army marched through it.

We've got to get these people out of here.

This place is a zoo.

This is a zoo.

Don't worry, Sarah.

Don't worry.

Ducky? Huh? Open the door.

We're going to need a bulldozer to clean this up. God, the water's great.

Terrific. I think I'll get Uncle Carl. And I need to work on my tan.

Hey, how about a little help around here? Later.

That's what I'm afraid of.

You're tripping on the carpet.

Morning, Mr. Perdue. I'm ready. What the hell?

Ducky. No, not how.

Who? Ducky.

Don't you remember?

Last night you promised to take me sailing.

I did?

Last night?

Oh, last night.

I don't remember.

Don't remember?

Oh, after I helped tuck you in and all?

Well, maybe I did.

You tucked me in?

I mean, things are kind of fuzzy.

So let's go. You promised.

Okay. All right.

How about letting me get dressed? Okay. Okay.

Come on.

Outside. All right.

Did you see that?

Hell's angels!

I

don't know how

people can get seasick. The ocean's so romantic.

Up and down, up and down.

Don't you think?

I never thought about it quite that way.

You're not still mad at me and Ginger, are you?

No. It's just that I got neighbors and... You know, well... I guess so.

It's hot.

I don't think that's a good idea.

Oh, I won't burn. I never do.

What are you doing?

Sun is better by you.

All right, I'll move.

Don't bother. There's room for both of us. I think I'll have to find some other

room.

Mr. Perdue!

Oh.

Well, I missed.

Probably not, you old toad.

I saw everything

from the house.

Stucky, you could have drowned.

Kyle saved me. Oh, Mr. Perdue, you saved my best friend's life.

I really don't know how to repay you.

I just did what anybody else would have done.

No, don't put yourself down like that, Uncle Carl. You're a wonderful guy.

It's too bad we had to screw things up, partying and everything.

Yeah, we didn't know you were against him. I'm not against parties.

I give them all the time.

Maybe you'll give us a going -away party.

Jackie, the man wants us out.

No, pardon.

I wouldn't say that.

You mean we can have a party?

I meant about moving out.

Oh, Uncle Carl.

Thank you. We love you. Uncle Carl, you're such a dog.

What did I say?

I want a nice time with you.

Cause I know what I'm gonna do.

I want a nice time to finally fall asleep.

Oh, feels good.

Looks great.

You lech.

Hey, I'm only human.

Yeah, a lot.

Julie Carmody, please.

Oh, hello, dear. This is Wilhelmina Brinker.

Over at Paradise Beach.

By the Purdue place?

Fine. How are you, dear?

Oh, just a friendly call.

Well, as a matter of fact, there is... Something I thought you should be aware

of. I saw Carl Perdue this morning with a girl.

Oh, well, he sure didn't act like it was his niece.

Well, if you're really interested.

Wang! Oh,

so sorry.

It's all right. Just get the limo.

The rimmo? Yes, the limo. Go get it.

Get the remote.

Hey,

look!

Stucky, we don't have time to mess around. We gotta collect wood for the

bonfire.

Find you something valuable.

Yeah, orange peels and dirty diapers.

Well, lock me in a freezer and call me a popsicle.

Oh, my God!

Where did that come from?

We are going to have a party tonight!

Yes, sir.

That's what our computer pronoun tells us. Paradise Beach. Yes, sir. By our

calculations, taking into consideration the tide, the probable buoyancy at the

bags, the position of the sea wolf last night, and the sea currents, we can

safely say that somewhere in the area approximating the perimeter... You're

right already.

Paradise Beach.

I want every man to break out and battle here.

Jack's going to try and retrieve his evil cargo tonight, and we're going to

him. We're not going to let the killer weed fall into the innocent hands of our

American youth.

Is my boat ready?

Ship, sir. Ship, whatever.

Prepare to cast off. Yes, sir.

I got the munchies for tonight and Uncle Carl sprang for it.

He and Scott are up at Willie's picking up the booze.

What are you guys up to?

Look what we found.

Is it... It isn't... It is.

It's just a little weed.

Well, maybe not such a little.

How about six trash bags full?

Six? Bags full.

Like that?

Don't be mad.

Be glad.

Yeah, it's for the party.

We're going to get busted.

Oh, come on, Sarah, wake up.

It's not the Middle Ages.

Just because you don't want to have fun doesn't mean you should spoil it for

everyone else.

Why is everyone always on my case?

I don't mean to be mean, Sarah, but just look at yourself.

You don't want to have any fun you're a 50 year old teenager

You

were kind of hard on her

maybe

old teenager about to loosen up and enjoy life that's not you oh yes it is

i'm gonna find out what i've been missing all this time sarah you haven't

missing anything everyone around here seems to think i have been what

else thinks doesn't matter sarah listen i have been listening

I don't know.

I don't know.

Oh, come on, Uncle Carl. You liked it last night.

Yeah, you told me it was great.

Well, I have to admit, I haven't slept like that since I was a kid.

Relax,

Uncle Carl. You're so tight.

Oh, my.

Oh, my.

Sometimes we win, sometimes you lose.

Still gotta play the game.

Luck is finding late at night, but it's hard to remember his name.

Oregano?

Oregano?

Hey, that's a good one.

Hey, Mama.

I'm not your mother.

Hey, I'm not into incest anyway.

Young man, are you popping pills?

I sure am.

I'm a popper. She's a popper. He's a popper.

Wouldn't you like to be a popper too?

Amigo, por favor, pick it up.

Pick it up yourself, wetbag.

Hijo de la gran puta!

You're late, but if you'll wait a second. Look at you. I'm shocked.

With these two little girls, these children.

Julie, if you'll just simmer down, you will see that what has happened here has

little to do with our relationship.

I'll say.

I've never participated in such debauchery. You lout.

Hussies. What's a hussy?

Who's loud?

Julie. Shut up.

Is there anything we can do to make it up?

Well, screw her.

Do you have a cigarette?

Have I got a cigarette?

That's what I said.

I rolled them myself.

What are you, some kind of a cowboy?

Tastes funny.

Must be the salt water.

Some of the bags leak.

Are you really a policeman?

What are you doing?

I'm looking at the boats, dear.

Oh.

That's good, Harlan. You should develop new interests.

bearings, Gower. In your pocket, sir. No, you idiot. My bearings.

Oh, dewey, sir.

Don't get so friendly, Gower. Not on duty.

See me after hours.

Aha! There they are, the scoundrels.

Libertines flaunting their booty.

Maybe it's just a party, sir.

Or a weenie roast.

Weenie roast?

Trying to contradict me?

I'll show you a weenie roast.

Tell the armorer to break out the cannons. Lower the assault boats.

We don't have any assault boats, sir. Damn it, man.

Don't you have any American ingenuity?

Me too.

Yes, sir.

American assault on our own beaches and we don't have a photographer?

That's mutiny.

I have an Instamatic, sir.

Fine, fine, it'll do.

Bounty, over the side.

Take a squad up to that house and search it.

Come on, keep moving.

How can a person ever have more privacy around here?

You kids know what you're doing to yourselves?

Your party is a temple.

Oh, I know.

You should watch what you put into it.

Oh, I do.

This killer weed.

This killer weed has destroyed more lives than typhoid, syphilis, leprosy.

in such perverted practices.

They grow up to be whores.

Why, Julie Carmody, what do you think you're doing?

I certainly will.

Ladies.

What was that all about back there?

What do you mean, what was that all about?

I felt like.

Why?

I know what I want now.

What?

I want to be just like you.

Who could do worse?

Iwo Jima. You were a Marine?

No, silly.

I was a wave.

But I always wanted to be a Marine.

Like Daddy.

Looks like the liberation of Paris.

Paradise Beach.

Okay, once we get there, we go ashore and gather up the stuff.

With that shipment and this, I can retire.

Captain, it's a trap, sir. What? Spit it out. In the cove. Bly ship, the Coast

Guard, they're waiting for us, sir. Damn.

What are we going to do, sir?

Dump the grass.

Head back.

Engine's full.

We going to pick up an unload, sir? Are you kidding?

That's it. I'm out.

You're out.

I'm going back into politics.

It's safer, more profit.

Set a course for San Clemente.

I think I'll take a vacation.

It's about time my assistant earned his keep.

How would you pretty ladies like to share in that?

Would we?

You would.

Fire's dying.

Bucky, that's fireworks.

I thought it was...

Just like I always thought it would be.

There'll never be another party like this one.

Bye.

Bye. Bye.

sun keeps shining not a cloud up in the sky everywhere love

could be hiding all you know is you gotta try wish this

could last forever gotta

Now, if you think.

We'll be right back.

Love just once or twice.

Nothing's gonna take you away.

Cause paradise is where I'll stay.

Paradise is where I'll stay.

I want to do paradise.

Let it melt on some night.

Make it come from the east.