All language subtitles for ALF - S01E03 - Looking for Lucky SDTV

Your eyelids are growing heavy.

You are getting sleepy.

You are no longer a cat.

You are a bagel.

Hey, you scared me. You ought to wear a
belt.

What's going on here?

Um, I was, uh, I was just teaching Lucky
how to tell time.

Show Willie what you've learned.

You were hypnotizing him, weren't you?

Okay, you caught us.

I'm trying to help Lucky beat his
smoking problem.

All right, it looks like it's once again
time to restate the rule of the

household. Rule number one, we do not
eat members of the family.

Willie, Willie, Willie.

Lucky and I were just kidding around.

Look, I got to go pick up Kate and the
kids now. While I'm gone, I'd like you

refrain from kidding Lucky.

No problem.

I'd also like you to refrain from
playing with priceless family heirlooms.

It's broken.

Lucky fell on it.

You know, it's not always true that they
land on their feet.

Lucky.

Lucky, don't listen to him. Don't listen
to him. You're not a bagel.

You're not a bagel.

But you are getting sleepy.

Just kidding!

I like that old time rock and roll.

Don't try to play the new Francisco.

You'll never even get me out on the
floor.

Ten minutes, I'll be late for the door.

I like that old...

Maybe we should have called first.

Well, I had the music pretty loud. I
probably wouldn't have heard the phone.

I was planning to have the place
spotless by the time you got back.

When did you expect us back? In April?

When I left, you said you were going to
behave, but this is not behaving. This

is mass destruction.

I don't know what happened.

I was sitting here doing better than my
best.

I decided I'd make myself a little
snack.

The rest is a blur.

How can one alien be so irresponsible?

I wasn't irresponsible.

I was hungry.

Did you eat everything in the house?

Oh, I don't think so.

Oh, wait a minute. Here's something.

Who? wants a cookie? I do.

I'll split it with you.

Brian, why don't you go feed Lucky?

I hope there's some food left.

You didn't eat all the cat food, too,
did you?

No way. I draw the line at intestinal
byproduct.

How can you eat so much?

I've been blessed with multiple
stomachs.

I don't understand why you don't gain
any weight.

It's all in the way you combine your
foods.

Really? That's interesting.

Yeah. Merv did a show on it. I have a
tape here somewhere.

I don't believe this.

Merv says it works.

Of course. Have you seen Merv lately?

All right. Forget Merv. We're not
talking about Merv no more. Merv. Fine.

off the air anyway.

Let's talk a little about how much food
costs.

Yeah. Hey, Kate.

You know, you could save a fortune by
clipping coupons. They did a whole show

about it on... The Fat Guy Show.

Coupon clipping is not a good idea.

I shouldn't be allowed to hold scissors.

Am I being overly sensitive, or is there
tension in this room?

Alf, let's get this place cleaned up.
I'll give you a hand.

Can we hold off on that a second? I feel
a burp coming on.

Oh, goody.

While we're waiting, would you take off
my shirt?

Sure.

No, not the one you're wearing. Right.

I can't find Lucky.

Oh, he's around somewhere.

I looked all over.

I wonder where Lucky is.

You know, Al?

Hold it.

No.

Look around some more.

Brian, see if Lucky's in the hamper. He
likes rolling around in dirty laundry.

Who doesn't?

Al, do you know where Lucky is? You know
Lucky?

He's a free spirit.

Last time I saw him, he was high
-tailing it out of the window.

What were you doing?

I was chasing him with a fork!

Just kidding.

On Melmac, a cat fork joke is a classic.

It's right up there with seltzer bottles
and whoopee cushions.

No wonder Vaughnville is dead.

Alf, the last time I saw Lucky, you were
teaching him to tell time.

What are you getting at?

Yeah, what does tell time mean?

It means hypnotizing the cat into
thinking he's a bagel.

Oh, you mean you think Alf might have
eaten?

Alf, you didn't.

Hey, hey, hey.

We're treading on some pretty serious
ground here.

These unjust accusations have litigation
written all over them.

I know my rights. I watch people's
court.

Alf, did you eat Lucky or not?

Willie, I know the rules.

We don't eat members of our family.

We don't eat members of any family.

Well, which is it?

I can't find Lucky anywhere.

Well, maybe he got sucked into a
parallel dimension.

I've seen that happen before.

I don't think so.

Oh, so I guess there's only one other
explanation.

The alien must have eaten him.

Well, I didn't.

Smell my breath. There's no Lucky on it.

That's the only thing that's not on it.

I wouldn't eat Lucky.

Would you?

I'm not saying anything until I talk to
my attorney.

Now, look, maybe we're rushing into
judgment here.

Maybe Lucky just went for a walk.

I'm sure he'll turn up.

It's a furball.

Lucky? Don't look.

Hey, this isn't Lucky.

I was licking some jello off my arms,
and I swallowed hair.

Come on, guys.

It's me you're talking to, Alf.

I haven't eaten a cat since I left
Melmac.

Come on, don't cry.

Hey, what's with this family?

Didn't you ever hear the expression,
innocent until proven guilty?

Not when the accused coughs up the
victim.

Is there anyone here who doesn't think
I'm guilty?

Well... Thanks, Lynn.

Maybe you ate him by accident.

I see.

Well, the indictment has been handed
down.

Thank you all for your support.

Call me when you finish building the
gallows.

On here.

Exhibit A.

Dear family.

No.

Too friendly.

Dear lynch mob.

I've been accused of a crime I did not
commit.

Accused by people I thought were my
friends.

You say...

I am a murderer.

I say, the only thing murdered today was
justice.

Oh, yeah, that is good.

But, like David Jansen in The Fugitive,
I will travel the country in a

desperate attempt to clear my name by
finding the one -armed man.

That can't be right.

By finding Lucky.

I will search relentlessly, taking time
out only to have love affairs with

beautiful women.

Now I must begin my journey.

Goodbye.

Yours till Niagara Falls.

Whoops. Oh.

P .S.

These are teardrops.

Great breakfast. Thanks, Mom.

I'm sorry, I'm just so hungry.

Me too.

Me too.

We better eat fast before Alf gets to
it.

Okay, I'll have a bowl of sugar shocks.

Sugar shocks aren't good for you.

How about if I pour some nice healthy
milk on them?

How about if I pour some milk on your
oatmeal?

Chocolate milk?

It's a deal.

Where's Alf this morning?

Probably too ashamed to come to
breakfast.

Or too full.

I had a dream last night that Alf came
into my room and tried to eat me.

Brian, Alf would never do that.

Of course he wouldn't.

You sleep with us tonight.

You know, I almost feel sorry for Alf.
Why?

I'm just trying to see things through
his eyes.

Trying to understand why he ate Lucky.

I mean, Alf has different instincts than
we do. On his planet, they eat cats the

same way we eat cows.

cows. Where do you think hamburgers come
from?

Supermarket.

I have good news. Brian, go get Al.

I want you to look at something. What?

I've analyzed the composition of the
furball, and I've compared it to the

of hair, a clump of Al's hair that I
found in the ice cream. Now, the

composition of the furball is the same
as the hair in the ice cream. Do you

what that means?

It means breakfast is over.

No, it means Al's is innocent.

So we were wrong? We accused him
unjustly?

We should have believed him.

Where's Al? I don't know, but I found
his note.

What does it say?

Skip the part about David Jansen.

It says he didn't eat Lucky.

Poor Al.

It says he's gone out to find Lucky and
to prove his innocence.

And his manhood.

This letter even has teardrops.

Grape -colored teardrop.

I must feel so betrayed.

I'm going to go find him.

I'm going, too.

I'm coming with you.

Me, too.

Alf is all alone out there. I'm really
worried about him.

And he doesn't know about crossing on
the green and not in between. That's

right. Where are we going to look? I
don't know. He could be anywhere.

Yeah.

You know, we really should have watched
more episodes of The Fugitive.

So, uh, what are you guys in for?

Okay, be that way.

Just tell me one thing.

That, uh, that sign over there, does
neutered mean what I think it does?

I guess it does.

Look, uh, anybody have a coat hanger?

I'll show you how to get out of this
dump.

Here you go, boy.

Dixnay on the anger hay. I think the
screw's coming.

Oh, my gosh, she's got a horse.

Okay, who wants a roommate, huh?

There you go.

What are you doing without your jockey?

Just kidding, just kidding.

Gee, this whole planet's uptight.

Come on, guys, let's loosen up.

On, Wisconsin.

On, Wisconsin.

Jump in when you're ready. Let's go.
Come on.

On, Wisconsin.

On, Wisconsin.

Plunge on through that line.

Hey, hey, hey.

Pull it down in here.

There you go.

Lucky.

Hey,

hey, Trigger.

Act cool. Listen.

You seem like a sweetheart. I'm going to
let you break out of here with me

tonight. Yeah, here's the plan.

We wait until it gets dark.

Then me, you, and that cat over there
are going to make a run for it.

All right?

Look, all you have to do is gnaw through
this wire mesh.

Got that?

Good. It's day. It's day. Okay.

Well, there they are.

Pick your pick.

It melted.

Terrible in here.

Oh, you get used to it.

Some of us wouldn't want to.

Come on, Heidi, pick a nice cat and then
we'll go. I can't be rushed.

Well, what kind of cat is that?

Oh, I don't know.

I don't know too much about these
things. I only work here part -time.

I'm an actor.

My dad's a producer and he says all
actors are idiots.

Well, he's right.

Very nice to meet you, sir.

What is that? That monstrosity.

That's a dog.

I think.

Forget it. No one's gonna want it.

May I show you something in a tabby?
Now, this cat and I were in a commercial

together once.

His face, my voice. Maybe you saw it.

Oh, boy, salmon chips.

They're perfect.

I don't think so.

It cost a lot of money. Come on, Heidi.
I'm sure you can find something.

Oh, all right. Guess that cat there
doesn't look too gross.

Nice choice. Nice choice. Just came in a
little while ago.

Okay.

There you go.

What are you going to name him? What's
your name?

Keith. Not Keith.

Let's go down. Thanks very much. Oh,
you're welcome.

Oh, listen.

Listen, I'm appearing in a small
workshop production of Extremity this

And if you're in the neighborhood, I'm
the one in the fireplace.

Looks like it's now or never.

Hey, hey, hey.

Hey, hold it down.

I'm auditioning here.

Did you hear what I said?

This is what? You're scaring Damien.

All right, all right. That's it.

I just can't wait to see their faces
when they see you.

Al, you're back!

Thank goodness. We've been looking all
over for you.

Before you say another word, may I
present to you Exhibit B.

Well, I guess this case is closed.

It's a cat.

It's not just any cat.

It's Lucky.

Well, soon they forget.

Uh, Alf, I think you've made a mistake.

Alf, Lucky?

Yeah, it's Lucky.

You know, it's a funny thing. He was in
Mrs. Akmanek's basement the whole time.

Well, don't we feel foolish?

Now we have two cats.

No problem.

You're getting sleepy.

Ow. Just kidding.

There you go, Luckheimer.

Ooh, yeah.

Who'd ever thought we'd see the day when
they'd trust me to feed you, huh?

Yeah.

Right now, I'm in the catbird seat, so
to speak.

Right now, I can get away with murder.

so to speak.

Right now, I could walk over to that
refrigerator over there, grab a couple

slices of whole wheat bread, a little
mayo, and slap together a BLT.

Bacon, Lucky, and tomato.

Yeah, yeah, I could do that.

And they wouldn't even have the nerve to
point their finger at the old alpha.

Nope, they'd probably blame Willie
before they'd blame me.

Yep, I could do that.

But I won't.

And why is that?

Because they trust me.

But don't get too comfortable.