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- It's neat
that they invited us to the country.
- It'll be even better if we manage to score with them.
- You can bang Jacqueline if you can, but...
- If I want to. - Stop showing off!
She's not the kind of chick to drop her panties
easily, right?
- I'm the kind of guy to drop mine
at the flutter of an eyelash.
- Well, anyway, do what you want with Jacqueline,
but keep your hands off Vicky, got it?
- Uh...
Not even a stray hand on her big fat ass?
- What's that supposed to mean?
- Well, it's obvious. She has a big ass.
- No, she doesn't. - She sure does.
- It's not bad, granted. - Yeah.
- But it's not big. - What is it, then?
- It's more of the generous, welcoming type.
- Imposing. - Exactly.
- That's what I'm saying, she has a big ass.
- You're a bit of a pig,
'cause if you took a look at Jacqueline,
if I were you, I'd shut up.
- Tell me, what have you got against her?
- Nothing, she's got nothing!
No boobs, no tummy, no hips,
no ass, no thighs, nothing.
The dreary plains, your girlfriend.
- She's got something much more important
that drives me to ecstasy.
- I'd love to know what. - I'll tell you.
A huge estate in Coulommiers, surrounded by 5 acres of park.
- 3 peaceful days in Coulommiers, a dream!
Can you imagine?
3 days wallowing in luxury, heaven!
- Pass me the keys? - Yeah.
- What did you do with them?
- They slipped into the lining.
- The bags, you moron!
- Shit!
- Well, what now? - Hold on!
Oh! Maniac! - There they are.
- Stop, thief! Stop, thief!
- Do you think they're after us?
- Looks like it, huh?
- You're caught like rats!
- Hey, he wants to shoot us, that jerk.
- They're crazy. Come on, let's beat it.
- It's off to a great start, our quiet weekend.
Peaceful. - Yeah.
Careful, red light.
- Who cares about the red light, I'm telling you!
- But what... what the hell is this?
- I told you, you grabbed the wrong bag!
- You shut up or I'll shoot!
Come on! Who could've double-crossed us?
- 2 young punks in a white car.
- Could you recognize them?
- I can. I took a picture of them!
There, boss! That's them!
- The Good Lord is with us, boss.
- Shut your trap! Take care of your Hail Marys!
- Thank you, boss. - Let's go!
- Slow down! We didn't do anything, right?
- You're right. We're running like thieves.
- Well, yeah.
- What's wrong with this guy? Is he crazy?
- Let them pass.
It's those maniacs again, those guys.
- Come on, hurry up! Pass!
- Bunch of lunatics!
- Toss the bags
and we'll forget about you.
- What bags?
- Don't play dumb! The brown bags.
- Did you see that? He wants to steal our clothes.
- What a shame! - There's no morality left!
- So, what's the answer?
- You want the answer? Here's your answer.
See ya. - What?
- Hang on, it's gonna get bumpy.
- Completely nuts, this guy.
- Move your heap out of the way, loser!
- I'm working here.
- And what do you think we're doing, dummy?
- Stop arguing, back up!
Ah! - Let me handle this.
- She's crazy, this chick!
- Ah! Shit!
- A car's on our tail! - Lose it, Marco, step on it!
- I can't go any faster. I'm flooring it.
- Do as I say.
- Faster, faster! They're catching up.
- Easy to say. I don't drive a Maserati!
Did you see how he drives?
- Doesn't matter! - This isn't Le Mans!
- Help! No!
- Normally, a broad is no fun.
On the job, she's a real pain. Shut up or I'll slug you!
Honestly.
- Here, there. The parking lot, quick. - Yeah, yeah.
- They're in the parking lot. - Follow them, we'll corner them.
- What about the Austin? - It's still there.
- But who could it be?
- Our Father, who art in heaven,
hallowed be thy kingdom, thy will happen.
- But what is it? - I don't know. The exhaust.
- Ah!
- Ah, the idiots. Shit!
Hang on!
- Hail Mary, full of grace.
Blessed art thou amongst women.
- The barrier, there! - I don't give a damn about it.
- Are you crazy? - Are we taking him with us?
- Let me out, I'm begging you.
- Stop. Gus, get rid of this freak.
- Go on.
- My skirt!
- Here, cover yourself. - Thank you.
Luckily there are still good people like you.
- I'll escort you, eh?
- With pleasure. - Let's go this way.
- We'll never catch them.
- And that Austin is still following us, boss.
- Thy kingdom come, amen.
Dammit! Do something, my God!
- Your turn to play, Gus.
- Ah well... Ah well, that's nice.
Thanks. I can always count on you.
Ah! Finally!
You really like to be begged, huh?
- They're catching up. - Huh?
- Get down, for God's sake! Get down!
- The right wheel!
Shit! My tires, man!
Every man for himself, buddy.
- Both bags
are burning inside.
- I saw the 2 guys take off with them.
- For delicate work, my hat's off to you.
- What is he talking about?
- He said for delicate work, boss...
- I don't do delicate work. No way.
What do you do?
- Guess, boss.
- Oh! Disgusting.
Oh!
- We have to hide. - But where?
- I don't know.
The holy rollers!
- Ah! Bravo. Saint Francis of Assisi.
You're arriving now?
- Excuse me?
- Are you from the Saint Francis seminary?
- Uh... - In jeans no less!
Worker-priests I can accept, but punk-priests, no!
- Forgive me, Father,
but we actually prefer the sisters, you know.
Yeah. Bye.
- Which doesn't stop you
from saying a little prayer for us,
because right now, we really need it.
- My sons, what an era!
- Is it you? - Yes, it's us.
- You're not early. Patrick and Maurice?
- Who? - The new chaperones.
- That is to say... - Of course you are.
He's Patrick and I'm...
- Maurice. - That's it.
- We can't hide anything from you.
- So, girls, hurry up.
We're running late. Come on.
Unbelievable, we're gonna miss it.
Come on! Speed it up. And they won't rush.
Honestly, we're not on the Champs-Elysées.
Come on!
Hurry up a bit. Yes, exactly.
*-Passengers on Royal Air Maroc flight*
*Air France 751 to*
*Casablanca and Marrakech are requested to proceed...*
- Hey, you're not nuns, are you?
- Why? Do we smell like mothballs?
- No, it's not that, but with the luck
we're having today, you never know.
- Is it a theatrical tour?
- Guess. - Music hall, ballet?
- No, it's more like a circus.
- Where are you heading like this?
- Into the unknown, buddy.
- Come on, for God's sake! Move your crucifix.
We're gonna miss the plane.
- There we are, everyone's here. 12 girls, 2 men, and me.
Come on, girls! Hurry up. Let's go. Come on, come on.
- Excuse me. Do you understand any of this?
- No. - What do we do?
- I don't know. Just follow, move.
- At the very front? - No, no.
- Do you see them? - No, no.
- You'll copy out for me
100 times the Corinthian epistle.
That will teach you to stare at accidents.
Come on.
- Oh, sorry, Father. My apologies.
Go ahead.
Girls, to the left. Hurry up.
Come on. Don't push these young men.
Unbelievable. Come on, hurry up.
- Please put your bag in the rack, please.
- You're dropping flyers.
- Excuse me, ma'am.
- Miss, you are mistaken.
- Excuse me, Sister.
- I took all that as cash?
- Don't you have any less stupid questions?
- Yeah, but those aren't flyers.
What are they?
- A miracle. - You think so?
*- Ladies and gentlemen, immediate takeoff.
Ladies and gentlemen, take off shortly.
- What do you mean our tickets were used?
We're right here. - And our group?
- Were you with the priests or the girls?
- With the girls. - That's it, flown away.
- Ay, ay, ay.
And the next flight to Agadir, when is it?
- Hold on, let me check.
It's difficult right now. The flights are pretty full.
But wait. Today is fully booked...
Ah! Tomorrow.
Tomorrow... I'm completely full.
If you want, I can put you on the waiting list.
- All this because mister wanted to see a burnt car.
- What do priests wear underneath?
- Nothing.
Or the same as us.
- Oh! How exciting! - Yes.
- Holy cow!
- There we go. Do you get it now?
- The bank. The guy who shot at us.
- There, exactly. You got it.
And then the black DS, the gunshots.
- Those bastards who shot at us.
Sorry, Father. I just wanted to say...
Oh, shit!
- It's the truth.
We were supposed to take all the misses to a gala in Agadir.
I'll tell you everything! I have nothing to hide.
- Which hotel?
What?
- The Salam.
- The little mouse.
It's for my mom, boss. - Oh really?
- How much is it to Agadir? - Round trip.
- 3000, 3500. - What?
Ten grand for the 3 of us?
Now that is a real low blow.
- We don't have a dime. - Believe me, we'll find it!
The wallets, the watch.
What did you say?
- Yes, boss. - Oh, alright.
- We won't go far with this, boss.
- Open it. Open it! Holy cow!
Gold teeth. I want them.
- You're not gonna do that? You're not that pathetic?
- Oh yes! Open your trap. - No!
- What? What?
- Oh!
Father!
- Shut up, you idiot.
It's not for you.
Women, so pretentious!
But men can be moving too.
Isn't that right, Father?
Don't apologize, Father.
Let nature take its course.
- That's a known fact.
After a heist, you end up with Interpol on your ass.
- How much is in there do you think?
- In the 2 bags? 5 mil easy.
20 years in jail, basically. - Well, it's very simple.
When we arrive, we hand it to the cops,
we explain it to them.
- Yeah, and we end up in the slammer right away.
- Why?
- I have a hard time believing it. So a cop, no way.
- You're right, we keep quiet.
What I'd really like to know
is who we are and what we're doing here.
- Gotta be logical.
If we're surrounded by girls...
Look, it's so we take care of them, right?
- Oh! - Sorry.
- Handsome young man, the misses are with me!
Come on, girls!
Rooms for all these young ladies.
- Do you have a room with an ocean view?
- ME TOO!
- All our rooms have an ocean view.
- Yoo-hoo! - Ah!
- We're rich, dude. - Did you see that?
We'll be able to buy a store
selling roller skates.
- Totally. - Holy cow! All this dough!
My country house, for my mom...
- You're splitting it already. - And here, it's...
Ah!
You're here!
- Yes, as you can see, yes.
- You were flirting. Excuse me.
- Not at all, no. We were putting away our...
- We have adjoining rooms.
- That's nice.
- Michèle is with me.
- Perfect.
- My name is Maryse.
- That's a pretty name, right?
- Charmed. Charmed.
- See you later!
- That's right, see you later.
- Ciao ciao! - See you later!
- Ciao!
- Bye! Bye! - Bye!
- Now, stash all this in the safe,
'cause I don't want to get a heart attack.
There. Thanks.
That way, we're safe. - Hey! You took some cash, right?
- A little, yeah.
- That's messed up. Put it back in the safe.
- Are you crazy?
It's for the transport, the guarding,
The anxiety. All that has a price, no?
- And there, how much is there?
- There's enough to grab a drink.
- A big one, I think, no?
- Yeah, I'm very thirsty.
- Leave that to me.
- Yes, Miss. Right away. - Okay, I'll put you through.
- Room 42, Marseille is on the line. - Right away, putting you through.
- Hello, Mom? It's Irène.
Yeah, yeah. We arrived safely. Yeah, it's great.
- Ah! I'm so happy, Mom.
If you only knew how beautiful Morocco is.
- No, it's very quiet.
There are no boys, I swear.
- All expenses are paid.
All-you-can-eat desserts, room and board, awesome.
No, no, Dad. I won't overdo the rosé.
- Right away, don't be impatient.
- Sorry, it's busy.
- That's one good thing taken care of, right?
- And now?
- Stop it! You got my hair wet.
Ouch! You're getting soap in my eye.
- The little misses are ours. After you, my lord.
- I won't do any such thing.
- Who is it?
- The 2 beauties who need us?
- They could open the door. - The phone is a delicate matter.
You know what I mean?
- Yes, okay. I see, I see.
- Hello?
*- Well, you're sure taking your time!
*What the hell are you doing?
- Well...
*- Huh? What do you mean, "well"? Is this Patrick or Maurice?
- Patrick. *- Ah! Perfect.
So, tell me, did you arrive safely?
- Who is this idiot?
*- Huh? Hello? Hello? No, don't hang up.
- Yes, forgive me for this absurd question,
but who is calling?
*- What do you mean "who is calling"?
It's your boss, Gaston Dupuis. From Charmes et Loisirs committee.
Do you recognize me now, moron?
So, where do we stand?
- Well, we have arrived.
*- I know that, since you're answering me, idiot.
I mean our girls. Do you have them well in hand?
- Miss Eastern Péronnaise.
- But you know that you should
be in Agadir today, right?
- But we are.
Is he drunk or what? - He's sick.
- Come closer.
Come even closer.
- Well, there. We can't get any closer.
- Sit down.
No, don't sit down.
Stand up.
Show... Show your legs.
- What for?
- Is that really necessary?
- It is absolutely essential.
Alright, come on. Take off those pants.
- He's a maniac, this guy.
- Mind your own business!
Come on, don't argue. Take that off.
What?
You wear tights and panties?
- No, Eminence briefs, very classic.
- Step on something.
- He's crazy, this guy.
On the bed, is that okay?
- Yes, exactly. On the bed.
Yes, get on the bed.
- There's no bed, boss.
- What do you mean, no bed? Ah yes, true. There is no bed.
Dummy, there is no bed!
- Ah, yes there is.
*- I'm telling you there isn't!
- What did we step on, then?
- Silence! Shut up!
And know that at the slightest screw up, bam!
Back to Paris!
You are very cute, Miss.
- For the 10th time, will you put me through to Houdan?
- Is that in France?
- Of course it's in France.
- H for Hassan, O for Odir, U for Uran, D for Delila,
A for Ahmed...
Is that right?
- Please.
- What do you want?
- Dakar. Where are you from?
- Good Lord, come on! What does that mean?
Do you understand anything? - Nothing.
What I do know, is they stole everything from us.
Even our traveler's checks.
- Here, you sign here, sir.
- Got a pen? - What?
- Something to wr...te, you know?
- Here you go, sir.
- Thanks.
- Is this thing expensive?
- Well... no.
- Then why is it tied down? - I don't know.
- How should I sign it?
- With your name, sir.
- Is Marco spelled with a C or a Q?
- You're so damn stupid! With both.
- There. - Thanks.
One moment, please.
- It works, it's in the bag.
- Of course.
- Are you done?
- Sir...
- You, break the habit of chewing gum
while serving customers!
- There is something
that doesn't seem right to me on this traveler's check.
- It's obvious, the second signature
doesn't match.
- What is it? Is this a hold-up?
- Where? Where?
- Don't shoot! I beg you, don't shoot!
- Where are the gangsters? - Here!
- Ouch!
- No, but... Are you crazy? No, but...
- May I?
- Gather all the girls!
- What's going on? - The girls are making a mess.
Gather them up for me before I go crazy.
Ah! Before I go crazy!
- Hop! Let's go.
Well there, the whole little family is all together.
- Where is Maryse?
- She's in her room.
- Well, I'm going. I'll go get her, I'll be back.
- Silence.
I said, silence!
Ladies, I am very, but very displeased.
- Who is it? - Alain.
Are you not feeling well? - No.
- You're crying. - Does it show?
- Come on, tell me everything. Like to a big brother, huh?
- No.
- You don't want to confide in me?
- Yes, but not like to a brother.
- Well,
why this big sorrow?
- Because I'm the ugliest of all the girls.
- Now, you're talking nonsense.
- Oh no, if I were pretty, you would have noticed me.
- That's false.
I like you a lot.
- Is that true? - Yeah.
- Then, prove it to me.
- What? Right now, here?
- Why?
Do you want us to repaint the walls first?
- No, but... Norbert is waiting for us.
- Who cares.
- What do the girls think about it?
- Do you think they think?
- Ladies, you must be the true face of France.
And instead of behaving with elegance,
you mess everything up.
So 2 solutions. 2.
Either you calm down,
or I'm dropping you.
- YES, WE GET IT.
- Patrick.
Patrick, it's me. Open up!
- Stuck. What do I do?
- I don't know. Run into your room, go.
- Patrick, finally!
Open up!
- Come in, it's open.
- Come on!
- Come on, hurry up.
- Oh!
- What the hell are you doing?
- I fell asleep. It's the jet lag...
- Oh! Jet lag... It hasn't even been 2 hours.
- It was enough to knock me out. - Lightweight.
- Tonight, make sure
that all the girls take their pills.
- The pill?
- It's part of the instructions. - We're on it!
- And tomorrow, everyone on deck
for the big gala rehearsal.
- The gala? - Yes, the gala.
Guys, you need to wake up!
You didn't come here to slack off.
- The gala! - Yes.
- The gala! They are cute!
- We hadn't understood. - That's it.
Speaking of which, I have the musical tapes in my room.
May the bravest come get them.
Bye, friends.
- Pill.
- Pill, come on. - Come on, come on.
Time to feed. To bed, now.
Come on, good night. - Sleepy time.
Pill.
- There's no point. - Why?
- I'd be surprised if Hermia gives me a child.
- On the other hand, I'd really like Cléo to give me one.
- Sleep well. I mean, good night.
Bye. - Whatever.
- Well, bravo! Lesbians.
- That'll make 2 less for us. - Yes, for sure.
- Pill. Pill, pill, pill.
There you go.
- Here. Is that good?
- Yes. Can I have another one?
- With pleasure. There.
Hey, a little decorum in the back, please.
- I wanted it so badly. - What's the matter with you?
- What's wrong with you? - I swallowed the pill.
- Oh, okay. Here, then.
There you go. Come on, good night. You are sweet.
Come on.
- Hey, I have one left. What do I do?
- Give it to me. You never know.
Are they locked? - All of them.
- Are we really at peace for the night?
- No problem.
- So, my darlings, I invite you to the club
for a drink.
It's crazy how much fun we're going to have all 3 of us.
- Wait. All 3 of us?
- Yes, it's a figure of speech!
- Say, with an ass like that,
she's sure not to be left wanting.
- Super, Norbert, right? - Doesn't concern me.
Whether we like it or not,
it's still more aesthetic.
- Hey! But it's... - Myriam!
- The bitch!
This can't be true! What are they doing here?
- I don't know.
- I have an idea.
Say, Paul.
Run to the phone, your wife is calling you from Paris.
- Why are you calling me Paul? - Because it's your name.
Well, yeah. Come on, Paulo, hurry up!
- What does this mean?
- What? Didn't you understand?
- Well, no. - It's a... a transvestite.
- A what? - A tranny.
- Oh! Good Lord!
And the others? - And the others too. All of them.
Hurry up, I'm telling you. Come on, Paul!
- Here, the police don't joke with those things.
- I'd like to understand. - Well, it's easy.
His name is Marcel and he's a delivery boy.
You coming, my little Marcel?
- Mechanic? - Yeah, at Renault.
Didn't you see how she was flexing her muscles?
Come on. Come on, darling, come on.
- Exactly, young man. Fisherman.
- Well I'll be! - You like cod?
- Not really, no. - Then, you let it go.
Robert, you beat it before I get mad.
- Pastry chef?
- Yeah. It's no piece of cake, huh?
Should we go in?
- And since I tell you that it's not a woman.
- Huh? - Good.
- Okay. So all of this is fake.
Fake eyelashes, fake boobs, wigs, and hair everywhere.
How horrifying! - My dream.
- Are you a fag or what? - Me, no.
- Well, I am.
And watch out, I can't stand
anyone touching my man.
You coming, my little Charlie? Goodbye.
Come on, girls. Let's go to bed.
Let's hurry up a bit. Come on, come on, girls.
- Flirting never hurt anybody.
- You'd think we were in a convent.
- We're not Carmelites.
- We're not oxen.
- Who do they think they are, these damn guys?
- It's really disgusting.
- We have the right to have fun, after all.
- At 20, you might want to make love, right?
- If there's an emergency, we are here, right?
- For mouth-to-mouth, I'm unbeatable.
I'm just saying, it can always be useful.
- Alain. - Yes?
- Can you come and do me a favor?
- Ah! With pleasure.
Yes, I'm coming.
- Come, we have something to show you.
- We did
something silly.
- So, you want to do silly things with me, girls.
You'll see, you won't be disappointed with the trip.
- Pfft!
Another man.
And on top of that, we don't understand what he says.
They have no women here.
- Am I not enough for you?
- But of course, my darling.
- Ouch! That hurts!
- I'm doing what I can.
- There, that's good.
Turn the other way.
- Oh. Hey.
- Push it into the hole, with a sharp thrust.
- Like this? - Oh yes!
- They could at least do that quietly.
- The hole, it's too small.
- Force it a bit.
- I'm going to hurt myself!
There, I think I've got it.
- Gently! It's very fragile.
- Disgusting pigs!
- What's gotten into them?
- I don't know. - I don't know.
- There, it's ruined.
We're gonna get the sun in our eyes
at 5 in the morning.
- It's not my fault. I didn't come for this.
I thought that... right?
- You think too much. Bye.
- So, man?
- Terrible. I was on fire.
I practically exhausted them, you know?
And you?
- You know Superman? - Yeah, of course.
- Well, he doesn't do better.
1, 2, 3, 4. And 1, 2, 3, 4.
There. Stop. Very good, let's breathe.
Come on, start again. Start again.
- Oh no! We can't take it anymore.
- We haven't eaten anything. We're hungry.
- Hey! Maryse. Maryse! Do you know what time it is?
- In your arms, time doesn't matter.
- Yeah, that's sweet. We gotta hustle.
Come on, get up a bit. Come on.
- Oh no.
- Come on, rise and shine.
- What? - What?
- Come on, get moving.
Norbert is going to yell. Gymnastics.
- Ah!
- No need, we did it all night.
- Oh yeah? - Yeah, what do you think?
- And you?
- It was the Pic du Midi, Everest, the Himalayas,
Kilimanjaro, what am I saying, Nirvana.
- Basically ice cold love, then.
- For us, it was more like a volcano, like Vesuvius.
- It rarely erupts.
- Oh, tonight, it did. There's a victim.
- Yes, but a consenting one.
Consenting, yeah.
- The chick, outside. He's gonna yell.
- We'll join you in a bit.
- Salam. - SALAM.
- Oh! Shit. The girls.
- Hey! Girls.
You're not forgetting anything?
- OH! YES!
- HEY!
WHAT ABOUT THIS?
- Hey! You!
You're not forgetting anything?
- Jumping jacks in silence, huh?
There.
Jumping is healthy!
- We'd like to get jumped. - You're taking away our men.
- What do you see in men?
- And you?
- Not the same, I'm not a woman.
- That can change.
- Don't despair.
- Eliminate the misplaced sarcasm, ladies.
Good. Stop.
Recess.
Everyone to the... sea!
- Come on! - Yeah!
- And in a quarter of an hour, meet for the rehearsal.
Patrick and Maurice will be waiting.
- Oh! Good Lord!
- What's the matter?
We're on it.
Did you see your face there? Unbelievable.
- Hey!
Didn't you see yours in the picture above?
- Hold-up in Paris 500... but that's us!
Oh shit!
- We're trapped here. - What do we do?
- Alright, come on.
Hello! - Hello.
- Hello, ladies.
Tell me, are you out of France-Soir?
- No.
- 1,000 francs, is that okay? - Yes.
- There you go. Goodbye.
- 500 bucks for your newspaper, is that a deal?
- At that price, I'll buy 10 and sell them back to you.
- Too bad, because there aren't any left.
- Thanks.
- Madam, I have good news for you.
- My husband left his mistress? - That, we don't know, but...
- Do you read France-Soir often? - Every day.
- You've won!
- For your loyalty, the French press offers you 500 francs.
- Thank you. - Good.
If you give us your newspaper, we'll offer another 500.
- You're lucky.
- Once in a while, it pays to be cheated on.
- Yeah. - My poor lady.
- Bless you.
- Thank you. - Thank you very much.
- Thank you, sir.
- Give me that. - I haven't finished the crossword!
- Who cares.
- Hey! Oh! I have one! I'll sell it to you for 1,000 francs.
- Guys, wait. 1,000 francs for France-Soir.
How much for Le Monde?
- Who cares, buddy. - Are you crazy?
- Hey! Mister. - Yeah?
- Will you take my Mickey? - Yeah.
- For how much? - 500 francs, okay?
- Plus another one, because you're very sweet.
- And me?
- Paris Match, 400.
- Le Matin du Sahara, 500.
- Times! - My wife to the highest bidder.
- Christian Marriage, 250.
- France-Soir, the whole lot, how much is it?
- 15,000 dirhams.
- Are you crazy? What's wrong with you?
- No, that's the price. The grapevine works fast.
- Alright, go ahead, pay. Who cares, go ahead.
- There, you figure it out with that.
- A France-Soir, please.
- No, there aren't any left. Come on, shoo!
Watch out, watch out!
It's not exactly warm, huh?
- It's at least 25 degrees in the shade.
- We were starting to get chills.
Especially him, he's sick.
- The beginning of a little flu. Nothing serious, but...
- Well, alright... Bye!
- If you want to warm up, we'll leave you to it.
Bye!
- Alright, so we'll pick up on the fourth movement.
1, 2... 1, 2, 3, 4.
- Honestly!
What kind of outfit is this?
You look like a tramp.
- My things are disappearing. They only left me a panty.
- Are they stealing from you? - They're borrowing, hiding things.
They want to piss me off.
- But who's "they"?
- Who do you think? One of these bitches.
- Hey! Be polite. - You want to yell?
- We have nothing to do with it.
- Maybe it's me you're suspecting?
- With your eyelashes on your cow eyes.
And your cowboy boots on your rotten feet.
- You sold them to me to buy whiskey.
- Liar!
- You don't remember, you were wasted.
- Take that back right now! - I'll smash you, bitch!
- Whore! - You drunkard!
- Language!
We are not at a political meeting.
- Bitch! - Cunt!
- You'll shut up, dirty... - Drunkard!
- You're hurting me!
- Ladies!
- I'll rip your hair out. - Drunkard!
No, I'm begging you! Not my hair!
- Oh yes! - Shit!
She scalped her!
- Hey! Mister.
Look.
Did you see my beautiful boats?
- Oh yes! They are very pretty, your boats.
- Here.
- Did you have an accident? - I was born this way.
- It's fabulous, it suits you.
- You think so? - Very much.
How exciting!
- Oh yeah? - Yeah.
So much so that the next cutie pie I meet,
I'll shave him.
No, no, no and no!
I don't want strangers at rehearsals.
Do you hear me?
- Peekaboo. - Oh! It's you.
But what are these costumes?
- It's for the carnal Paris, hoodlum Paris number.
- It looks rather trendy.
- Oh yes! It's great.
- You think so? - Yes.
- Their faces, you could eat them up.
- That's right, I'll leave them to you. Eat them.
- Thanks.
By the way, what do I do?
- First, you shut up and then you sing.
- Make up your mind, will you?
- Ladies, please.
We'll start with something like this.
1, 2, 1
2, 3, 4.
- Our bodies, alright Nice, thanks daddy
Not too bad Overall
But our real value Is our mind
- That's good. That's good, come on.
- Our eyes could be better But they cost more
We don't pity Those who look like us
What's beautiful about us Is our mind
- We are all descendants Of Rodin's great thinker
- People often find us charming
But it comes From our mind
- Einstein was ridiculous
- Hardworking little scientist
- We found the formula E equals I love you
Squared
Our breasts are perfect breasts Super well made
It turns the men on
But what's seductive about us Is our mind.
Our legs are picture perfect Nothing better
What's above Is pretty good too
But the sexiest of all Is our mind
- Step forward, come down on me.
*- Departure for Fez and Casablanca.
*Air France Royal Maroc flight 2035,
*immediate boarding, gate number 55.
- Cops, boss.
- No problem. We'll pass quietly, smoothly.
- For that, we're golden, boss. I have the colt.
- What? - You're a real idiot.
- But it's really small, boss. - Give it.
Give it, I said! Discreetly, dummy.
- Well, say,
you have nice toys.
Who shoots first?
- I don't know.
- So I'm the bad guy and you're the good guy.
Okay? - Yeah, yeah.
- We are all high school grads Graduated with honors
We have bright ideas That are worth our measurements
We should be beautiful and dumb
It's not fair when we have
A head so well made
- And so full at the same time
- At night, little cuddles Are not that clever
It's within everyone's reach
What sets us apart Is our mind
- Sir, you still want To talk about love
But if you want us to answer
- You must also address Our mind
What's seductive about us Is our mind
What's seductive about us Is our mind
- That wasn't too bad. 5-minute break.
- About time.
- Norbert. - Yes?
What is it, my bunny?
- You review the final movement with me,
because it was a little sloppy.
I'm going to take a little stroll to the beach.
- Alright, girls, from the top.
*- Ladies and Gentlemen, in a few moments
*we will be landing at Agadir Inezgane airport.
*For safety reasons, we kindly ask you
*to extinguish your cigarettes
*and check that your seat belts are securely fastened.
*Thank you.
- You were great.
Where did you learn all that?
- In reviews, at the Club Méditerranée.
- But say, you know how to do everything!
Singing.
Dancing.
Making love.
Robbing a bank.
- Robbing a bank? What? Wait, what?
- 5 million. Bravo.
- No, no. That's not it at all.
I'll explain. - There's nothing to explain.
- You are my Pierrot le Fou, you are my Bogart.
- Maryse...
- I knew you were a tough guy, a mobster, a boss.
- Stop right there.
- Kiss me, my Al Capone.
Hey! What's your alias? - It's Alain the...
Alain the... - The what?
- Oh boy. Alain the boy.
- Ah! Super brilliant.
- Shit! Boss.
- Shit! Boss.
- Are we in Agadir here? - Yes, sir.
- Ah, how much will it be to the Salam hotel?
- 900 dirhams.
- Are you crazy?
- No.
100 dirhams for the ride, 100 dirhams for the handle,
700 dirhams for the door.
- What? 900 dirhams? That's robbery.
- If you're not happy, sir, you take another taxi.
He will charge you for the engine.
- Boss...
- Boss...
- Well, "boss"...
- Hey!
- BF4 here. They arrived safely.
Heading to Salam hotel. For me, mission accomplished.
- Maryse! Michèle!
You're up!
Hurry up!
- Come on, run. Otherwise, you'll have to deal with me.
- Do you know the latest? - I can guess.
Michèle takes you for a mobster? - You know?
- Maryse pulled the same on me. - Oh no.
- It's exactly as I'm telling you. It turns her on, too.
- They're crazy.
- And we're in a fine mess. - You think so?
- Mind you, thinking about it, the police are floundering.
And the mobsters, before they get here, good night.
- So, do you know or not?
- Are you with the police?
- Yes. - No.
- Well, yes and no. So, do you recognize them?
- Yes and no.
Is there a reward?
- Yes. - No.
- Well, yes and no.
The reward,
is that I don't use this.
Get it? So?
- It's them.
- And do you know where we can find them?
- Yes.
- This afternoon, they will be...
- Where? - At the King Bird.
- Where's that?
- At the King Bird.
- Alright, listen.
Slyly, we act like nothing happened.
The gala, the girls,
and then we give the cops a ring...
a ring to the cops, we hand over the money and we breathe.
- It won't be too soon, I was starting to run out of air.
I was fed up.
- Thanks, you're a slow learner, but you explain well.
- Barakallah oufik.
- Huh? Yes, bye.
- What do we do, boss? I didn't get anything.
- Explain it to me, slowly.
- Ah! But... Look.
- Ay, ay, ay!
Ay, ay, ay!
- Ah, alright then.
So, are we floundering?
- It's them, gentlemen who forced me to give you away,
but I didn't want to, gentlemen.
Mercy, gentlemen. Mercy. Mercy.
- What?
- Mercy!
- Who's "them"?
- 3 guys. - 3 guys what like?
- A big redhead with a beard, is that right?
- Yes! - Shit!
- It's them. - That's what I'm telling you.
- It's getting ugly. What do we do?
- Come.
- Ah!
- Oh no, no, no and no!
You won't do the show in that outfit.
- Yes we will. - No we won't.
- It'll be in this costume or nothing at all.
- And you can take it or leave it.
- This isn't a transvestite tour.
Honestly, what will you look like in the
Paris Pigalle number? - There are no Arabs in Pigalle?
- Oh! They're...ing me! I'm all...ed!
Stop! Let me go! Let me go!
I have other things to do. They are cute.
Alright, Aziz. Tell us, Aziz.
Are you shining the spotlight on me, there?
Aziz, I said the whole spotlight on me, there!
Beloved public, dear friends, I am very, very happy
to welcome you tonight to the King Bird in Agadir
to present to you 12 super misses
of international reputation.
Don't smile, sir.
Hold on tight to your husband, madam.
Because they were selected with great rigor,
but also
a lot of love.
Because they are beautiful,
they are blonde, and they are tanned.
Beautiful, blonde and tanned!
They are brunette, blonde and beautiful
By day rays of the sun And at night
Bouquets of stars
So we Are all on our knees for them
And sometimes our voice gets tied up
We love them in spite of ourselves
- Yes but you
You want to play the tough guys
The machos the jealous ones
And you'll eat out of our hands Tomorrow
Little men Who rolled to the max
But for whom the slightest apple Is the worst of temptations
Careful watch out
The so-called stronger sex Of power and sport
Of brutal authority
Did you know That in the world we live in
It's the strong one who desires
But the weak one who chooses
- We are crazy
We speak to you from the heart
The silly language of flowers
And you mock Us and everything
We think we're tough guys We think we're big
But we're only children
Who wait for love Only one and are angry at themselves.
- Watch out The so-called stronger sex
Of power and sport
Of brutal authority
Did you know That in the world we live in
It's the strong one who desires
But the weak one who chooses
- What the hell are you doing here? - Mind your own business!
- This swimsuit really hurts!
- It's true.
- It's so hot in this room!
- Do you know them?
- Are you part of their gang?
- Yes. - No.
- Well, yes and no. So?
- It's Alain the boy. - And Marc the bomber.
- Oh really? Professionals.
- Oh yes. - Super bosses.
- And where are they?
- There.
There.
- They're chicks, boss.
- We are looking for guys, right?
- Hold on. Hold on, guys. We have to think here.
- Well, we'll leave you to that.
- There are some guys asking for you.
- What do they look like? - Dumb as a box of rocks.
- Already? - Oh! Shit.
- We're not going out. On stage. Go!
- The 2 chicks. It must be them.
- It wasn't women who stole our bags.
- He's right.
- Quiet down. I said: "Quiet down!"
I'm going to take a closer look. - We're right behind you, boss.
- On one condition. Be as discreet as possible.
Hey! Smooth and easy. Understood?
- Count on us, boss.
- What's that?
Get out of here right now. - No!
- Yes! Ah!
- We'll meet up, eh, guys?
- What are you saying, Mister?
- Don't stay here, Mister.
Our husbands are in the audience.
- If they find you, they'll chop you into pieces.
- They'll chop off your dick.
- We'll wear it as a necklace!
- Boss! - We're here.
- I can't believe this!
- Did you see the camouflage, boss?
- Beat it, beat it!
- Where did they come from?
- You dance very well, boss!
- So, is it them?
- I don't know yet.
- Leave right now. Otherwise, I'll call the police.
- You, the lesbian, get lost.
- Me, a lesbian? Well that's a bit much.
- Ha ha! Hands up!
Not you, idiot! Unbelievable.
- Where's the gun? - I have it, boss.
- Well, say "hands up." - Hands up.
- But with your gun, dummy!
- Oh! Sorry, boss.
- Come on, quick. Quick! And outside, huh?
- Easy! Where's the fire?
- No arguing. Outside, right now.
- After you, my lord. - What does that mean?
Come on, you. Hurry up, will you?
- Oh! Excuse me, boss.
- Alain. Marc!
- Alain? Marc?
- Shit! Quick!
- Hey! Taxi.
Come on, come on, come on.
- Take it easy! - Hurry up!
- Should I shoot them right now, boss?
- No, you idiot! How will we find the money?
Come on, get in. - That's true.
- Get in, dammit.
- Look!
Let's take the bikes, quick!
- Oh! But what's happening?
- They kidnapped Alain and Marc.
- My God! Did they ask for a ransom?
- Yeah, around 5 million.
- My watch! Who stole my watch?
- Don't touch me, don't touch me! - Ah!
That's my pants!
- Give me the shirt. Are you gonna give me the shirt?
Boss, boss!
He won't give me back the shirt.
- Shut your traps!
Where's the money?
- At the hotel.
- Step on it.
- Can't we change somewhere else?
- No! Those aren't the pants.
- What's happening? - We went the wrong way.
- Really? - U-turn.
- Over there? - Yeah.
- Let's go!
- Where's the money? - In the safe.
- Let's go.
- Who's giving the orders here?
Huh? - It's you, boss.
- Well? - Well, say it.
- Let's go. - Where to, boss?
- To the safe!
- Oh!
Girls!
Oh!
Come back!
I blew out my shoe.
Look at my shoe, I got a flat.
- There we go.
It's all there.
- How beautiful! - I'm so moved!
- Wait a minute. Those bags are marked.
Take those two, empty them and put the dough inside.
- How much is in there?
- We already told you, it's 5 million.
- How much is a stick? - A mil.
- Why are you walking backward?
- To keep an eye on you.
- Wouldn't it be simpler from behind?
Anyway...
- They really take me for an idiot!
- They aren't wrong, boss.
- Right!
It's time to part ways, eh, guys?
- Not like this. - We share.
- What?
- We took risks.
We hid the loot. - What?
- Plus, the police are looking for us.
- But I don't care!
We are the ones who did the hold-up!
- Exactly.
- We's the ones who done it.
- Who have done it. - What?
- Who have done...
- Are you sure?
- Absolutely. It's us.
Just us, on April 22nd at noon,
Avenue Kléber at the Mexican credit in the 16th.
No, seriously! Come on!
- Huh! - Huh!
- They think I'm an idiot.
- They might not be completely wrong.
- I don't understand anymore, boss.
- The more subtle we work, the less it works.
- Yet we're gifted, boss.
- How awful, your things!
It's flopping all over the place, look.
Ah! Really, women!
Quick! Hurry up, girls! Come on!
- Excuse me, Inspector.
- I was very scared, you know?
- You're not hurt? - No, I'm fine.
- Really?
- Outpourings of this kind are better
than outpourings of blood.
Right, Inspector? - No, not that way.
Go out the back, it's safer.
I have a few questions to ask you.
- We'll leave you.
- See you later.
- So?
- They're gonna have to deal with us. - It'll be bloody.
- What? - Take this.
- Ouch! - Accomplice! Bastard!
- Oh! Hey! What are you doing?
Are you crazy? You are insane!
- You don't know him? He's the Inspector.
- Stand up!
- Misses, let me pass.
Inspector, if someone has to be arrested,
it should be me.
I want to be punished for all these unworthy bitches.
But tell me, has anyone ever confessed
that you are very charming?
- Inspector!
- Farewell crook, farewell boss... You don't hold a grudge?
- No!
Goodbye, madness. And hello, life!
- Definitely, there are no more men.
You, shut your mouth, huh?
- But don't be afraid, my darling. I'm here now.
- Our cruising altitude is 11,000 meters,
our speed is 900 km/h.
*We are currently flying over the city of Casablanca
*and will successively fly over the cities of Rabat, Tangier,
*Seville, Hinojosa.
*We expect to land at Paris-Orly in 2 hours 45 mins.
*Thank you for your attention and have a good trip.
- Did you bring back stuff? - Yes, trinkets.
- Can we see?
- Yes.
- Ah! I caught your eye.
What's so interesting in there?
Surprises? - Oh, yes!
- A big surprise for us, then!
- A huge one.
- But where did you get this?
- It's the hold-up money, my darling.
- What? - Yes.
- And how did you do it? - That's our business.
- Oh no!
Oh no! Oh, no! It's not going to start again.
- Who's the idiot who pulled the alarm?
- Our bodies, alright Nice, thanks daddy
Not too bad overall
But our real value Is our mind
Our eyes could be better But they cost more
We don't pity Those who look like us
What's beautiful about us Is our mind
- We are all descendants Of Rodin's great thinker
- People often find us charming
But it comes From our mind
- Einstein was ridiculous - Hardworking little scientist
- We found the formula
E equals I love you squared
Our breasts are perfect breasts Super well made
It turns the men on
But what's seductive about us Is our mind
Our legs are picture perfect Nothing better
What's above Is pretty good too
But the sexiest of all Is our mind
We are all high school grads
Graduated with honors
We have bright ideas That are worth our measurements
We should be beautiful and dumb
It's not fair when we have
A head so well made - And so full at the same time
- At night, little cuddles Are not that clever
It's within everyone's reach
What sets us apart Is our mind
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