All language subtitles for 1.Million.Happy.Nows.2017.WEBRip.x264-ION10

[Birds chirping]

[Man chattering]

[Woman on tv]
How can you say that?

Why didn't I listen?

-Lainey? -I should've known
that she was telling the truth.

She always did.

Vivian is gone.

Lainey?

Lainey!

Lainey.

Lainey!

Val, she's gone.

I don't know.
I can't find her.

We had a fight,
and I yelled at her,

and I don't know
if she's angry

and she's doing this
on purpose

or I don't know if something
happened to her.

I don't know where she went.

[Audience applauding]

[Male announcer] Lainey
Allen as Vivian westcott,

"valley Springs."

You don't want
what's best for ed.

You want what's best
for yourself.

It would break him to know that
you were here. It really would.

I think we both have secrets,
Vivian.

-Me?
-You said it yourself.

It would break him.

I have more decency
in my worst mistakes

than you have
in your finest moments.

[Audience applauding]

And the Emmy goes to...

Lainey Allen.

[Music playing]

-[Man] Lainey. Lainey, over here.
-[Camera shutters clicking]

-Over here, please.
-[Woman] Lainey, just one shot.

[Man] Lainey.

Cheers.

Cheers to another 20 years.

Please.

Okay, I know nothing's
been signed or sealed

or anything like that,
but come on.

"Valley Springs"
is your home.

-It always will be your home.
-I know.

And my home,
if she gets resigned.

It's important.
I need a job.

-[Woman] You are totally on.
-Liar.

[Whispered chattering]

-[Man] I look like I'm drunk. -Well,
you always look like you're drunk.

But I'm not.
I had, like, one scotch.

Listen. Sober up. I wanna
introduce you to somebody.

-Excuse us.
-[Man] You look great.

-Hi.
-Are you making friends?

Well, yeah.

-Aden.
-How are you?

-Hi.
-Hi.

Lainey, you remember Aden
from "Hollywood tonight."

Of course I do.
It's good see you.

We're going to be doing
a really nice feature on you,

and I want to pull some old clips,
really fun, get a couple of--

-ooh.
-Thanks, that's great.

-Sorry.
-It's all right.

We'll talk.
We'll talk.

[Chattering continues]

Come here.

-You're so beautiful.
-Oh.

If you think
you're gonna manipu--

you think you can just show--

[distant crew chatter]

[Whispering lines]

I can't. These--
these are not sticking.

They're not sticking.

And i--

you know what? Because
they're badly written lines.

They're just bad,
and they don't make sense.

Well,
you make them make sense.

That's what you do.

"Soap's darkest days.

Despite the fact
that the soap opera is dying,

Lainey Allen, 49..."

[Chuckles]

"...refuses to do so."

That's lovely.
I'll send them flowers.

And Aden wants
to do a follow up.

Aden from "Hollywood tonight."
You just met him.

There were
a lot of people there.

I really don't remember him.

You spoke to him
for half an hour.

Okay...

-[Whispering] -Honey, how
much did you have to drink?

-Really?
-You don't remember him.

I had one drink.

-Just one drink?
-I had three drinks.

I don't remember him.

Okay. Bye.

Bye.

If you--

you think you're going
to manipulate

your lying, cheating self

back into Casey's life,

you've got
another thing coming.

That's...

I'm sorry. Hang on.
Let me do that again.

If you think
you're going to manipulate

your lying, cheating self
back into Casey's life,

you have
another thing coming.

Y--

l--

-what's going on?
-I'm fine.

-Fine.
-Something going on?

Nope.

Something I should know about?

Aside from the dialogue rolling off
the tongue like a lead balloon,

no, everything's fine.

Okay, well,
take all the time you need.

No. No, I'm fine.

Okay, everybody, settle down.

And five, four, three...

If you think you're going to
manipulate your lying, cheating self

back into Casey's life,
you have another thing coming.

You're gonna have to...

[Whispers]

Uh...

I--

I'm not going to be an extra
on my own show.

They want you to renew.

Yeah, to be a talking prop.

More funerals and weddings

-and group scenes.
-No.

No, val said that you had
a worthwhile storyline coming.

I thought you wanted to spend
more time with me.

I do, but the show is--
is your whole life.

It's who you are.

So you're worried there's not
going to be anything left?

I did not say that.

You didn't have to.

So this is it?

Huh.

I think it's
a really good idea.

It's not something
that I expected from you,

but I'm excited.

And I think you're right,

a change of scene
will do us good.

[Gasps]

[Chuckles]

Yeah?

Oh.

Oh, oh...
[Whimpering]

No. No, no, no, no.

[Squeals]

Stop it.

I'm having a moment,
a very traumatic moment.

Shh, no, this is gonna...

Right. Right?

[Gasps]

[Woman]
Hello, heaven.

-I made that for you.
-[Lainey laughs]

-You're really handy.
-[Muttering] I know.

It's pretty.

It's pretty.
I'll give you that.

It's nice. Yeah.

-You love it.
-It's pretty.

You love it.

-Is that a prerequisite?
-Hmm.

Ocean view, fireplace,
trampoline.

[Laughing]

[Squeals]

Oh, my god.

[Clears throat]

What do you think?
Too much?

No. No, that's perfect.

You know what? Better yet,

let's use it as a mug tree.

[Seagulls squawking]

To new opportunities.

To going to bed early
and waking up late.

To taking afternoon naps.

[Laughs]

To matching jogging suits.

But not--
not the swishy kind.

[Both chuckle]

[Blinds zipping]

How about
we go to breakfast?

Uh, love that idea.

In two hours.

Oh, no. Stop!

-Come on.
-Why are you up?

I can't break a habit
like that overnight. Come on.

-Come here.
-No. Up.

You're up. I know.

Come on.

No, no, no.

No.

It's going to be
a beautiful day.

Okay.

I could get used to seeing you
like this.

A little downtime before we
get everything figured out.

I don't mind a little downtime
when there's uptime to plan for.

[Laughing]
It's true.

You're Lainey Allen.

Yes.

[Woman laughing]

Oh, my goodness.

I could hardly believe it when
they told me you were here.

I'm Julie. I'm the owner.

Hi.

Love the show.

We've watched you
for years.

Oh, thank you. I'm glad.

I am just--
i am just gonna be so sad

to see you go.

It won't be the
same without you.

Thanks.

[Laughing]

Gosh, just think.

Here I was sad to see you
leave the "valley,"

and you've gone and done
something so much better

and showed up right here
in my own place.

[Laughs]

How long are you in town?

We're renting a place here.

You are.

[Sighs] Don't you just love our
little corner of the world?

Well, you know what?
I know everyone in town.

If you need anything,
you just ask me.

I'll introduce you around.

I'll fast track you into
all the right circles,

make sure you--

have a good time
and meet the right people.

-Well, we came to the right place.
-We did.

Your home away from home.

Thank you.
Can we just get the check?

Absolutely not.
It's on the house.

Oh, thank you. Yeah.

-Okay.
-[Chuckles]

Good to see you.
You, too.

Oh, Vivian-- Lainey...

-Your purse.
-Oh.

-Thank you.
-Thank you.

See you again.

[Mouthing]

[Chuckles]

We met for the first time
right before this shoot.

Do you remember?

You remember that?

Of course I do.
Don't you?

Yeah, I remember that,
but we didn't speak.

I didn't think you remembered.

Well, I may have started life
in a closet,

but it's Vivian
who's going to end up there.

[Thuds]

You think I'll ever do anything
i can be proud of again?

Oh.

Of course you will.

Hmm.
[Chuckling]

-Why do we have a beanbag?
-I don't know.

[Soft music playing]

That's a sad move.

What?

Hmm.

? I like a day that's clear

? or at least a night so bright,
it chases darkness... ?

-oh, yeah?
-Mm-hmm.

That's a good move
if you're a giant cheater.

[Music continues]

Lainey, what are you doing?

Do you not want to play
anymore?

Are you bored?

[Gasps]

[Laughing]

Here.

Thanks.

You seem distracted.

Is it stress?

From five shows a week working

to deciding
where the toaster goes?

I think I can handle it.

I am going out of my mind.

I'm glad you have
so many reasons to be happy.

-No, that's not what I meant.
-That makes me feel great.

That's not what I meant.

Well, what did you mean
the other five times

you've mentioned
how pointless it is

since we got here?

I'm happy to be here with you.

I've never doubted that,
but...

Work has been a big part
of my life, and it's gone,

so can you just
not take it personally

until I figure this out?

I love you.
I love spending time with you.

But now that you're spending
so much time around me,

maybe I'm just afraid

that you're not going to be able
to find things to still love.

It's not even a question.

-Hey.
-Hey.

So, val and Jason are driving
through next weekend.

They're headed up the coast.

They wanted to see
if they could stop in.

Yeah, sounds good.

-Are you sure?
-Yeah, sounds good.

[Muttering]
Sounds good.

I hate this house.
You can't find anything.

You want some?

So between
my son's brain hemorrhage

and saying good-bye
to three exes,

I am no stranger
to a doctor's office.

[Chuckles]
Well, all we're going to do

is check that
your short-term memory

and your cognitive
functioning are--

they're all
where they should be. Okay?

She's forgetting
small household things,

you know, where things go,

their names,
things we've talked about.

It-- it's
a concentration thing.

I'm not concentrating
because I don't care.

Right. Well, have you
experienced changes in mood?

Depression? Loss of interest?

Nope. My memory is just fine.

This is why we're here,

'cause it's-- you know,

just seems kind of sudden.

You know,
seeing as you are here,

there's no reason
not to go through

with what we call
a mini cog test.

And it just means
I'm going to say three items,

and I'd like you
to repeat them back to me.

-Okay?
-Mm-hmm.

Spoon, chair, tree.

Spoon, chair, tree.

Good. Easy, right?

So just try to remember those,

and in a minute I'll ask you
to repeat them.

Now, I would also
usually ask you

to draw the numbers
on a clock face for me,

if you would.

Ah, look at that.

It's a-- it's a beautiful part
of the world there by the ocean.

It's gorgeous.

It just gets more beautiful
as you drive up that coast.

-It does. -Always wanted to
get a place by the water.

-You should.
-Yeah?

All right, good.
We're nearly done here.

Lainey, just repeat
those three items for me,

if you would?

-Lainey.
-Yeah.

Um...

Chair.

Chair...

Spoon. You said spoon.

Um, this is crazy.
Come on.

I could remember these easily,

but they're abstract.

They have no context
or meaning, right?

This is silly.

It doesn't make any sense.

Okay, um...

All right, well, there's--

there's one more thing
i could recommend--

a neuroimaging scan.

That'll give us
a good place to start.

Six weeks?

You're not going to do
anything?

Okay.

Thank you. I will.

Who was that?

The doctor.

Is he not talking
to me directly?

Am I officially incompetent?
Are you my legal guardian?

I called him.

Hiding in the bedroom.

I'm not hiding.
He left a message,

and you never play them,

even when the light
is blinking.

Okay.

Do you want to tell me?

Um, the scan is clear.

Okay.

All right.
That's great, right?

Yeah, it rules out
a lot of serious problems,

but they ran a blood test

for a gene,

an inherited gene.

It's the early onset
indicator.

Oh.

Wow.

You knew.

You knew that
this was a possibility,

and you didn't tell me?

What would you have done
if I had told you?

That's why we're here.

Because you were afraid

this was happening to you,

and you didn't tell me?

You're so calm.

How can you be so calm?

You didn't think
it might be helpful

to tell me,

that maybe I would like to have
time to process this, too?

I didn't know for sure.

It was a 50% chance.

They said it was a 50% chance.

If I had told you,

you would've spent
the last ten years of our lives

waiting for this day
just like I have.

Well, at least I know

we won't pass it along
to our kids.

Can we get out of here?

You'll never guess
what I hunted down,

and I just couldn't pass up
the opportunity

to ask you to sign it.

Would you mind?

Of course.

Uh, what's your name again?

-Julie.
-Julie.

And could you write it
to hal, too?

He was my husband.

He watched you every day.

He's gone now, but I know
this'll make him smile

down from heaven.

Thank you so much.

You bet.

Excuse me.

So she didn't marry Jason
after all?

No.

That just broke my heart

when I read about it.

Is she okay?

She's great. She's fine.

Have you-- have you been friends
with her for a while?

A while. Yeah.

Can I just ask you. I--

I won't tell anyone.

I mean, it's gonna stay
right here between us.

Has she moved on?
Is she seeing anyone new?

She's definitely
seeing someone.

Someone from the show?

Uh, not-- no, not really.

No, it's-- she's--

no.

Um, is it serious?

Yeah. Yes.

Can you tell me?

I just want her to be happy.

Well, yeah, she--

you know, she's--
she's with me.

Oh. I'm sorry. Oh.

I don't-- um...

Oh, gosh, I'm in your seat.

I, um...

Thank you for this.

Yeah.

[Sighs]

[Man chuckles]

-Hi.
-For you.

Oh, thank you.

-Hello.
-How are you?

-Good.
-Good to see you.

-Oh, my word, look how
beautiful this is. -Wow.

It's beautiful. It's not
as beautiful as you two.

-Come here.
-Do you wanna see outside?

Yes, of course.

So the writers came to me
with this idea. Right?

Oh, they're bringing Todd Hayes
back. Did you know?

N-no, I didn't. I--

well, it's inspired,
if you think about it.

We find out
that Todd's my son.

[Chuckles]

Oh, gosh,
i didn't see that coming.

It makes sense,
you know, given our histories,

because we know that Avery lied
to Zach about the baby, right?

And then of course...

Honey, Jason, really please.
Wow.

I think Lainey's heard enough farfetched
baby antics to last a lifetime.

Well, she had sex with Todd.

Oh, god.

For the first time,
i really understand

why it's a little strange
to let this job consume you,

'cause you don't know where

you end
and the character begins.

Well, then you're well on your way
to being normal again. Cheers.

[Women laugh]

Anyone want
anything else to drink?

Would you like some coffee?

Yeah, that'd be great.

I'll get it.

Well, this is a change of pace
from the Lainey I knew.

Five days a week
and all those hours

to a nice peaceful spot
like this.

I don't know. A less hectic
life would never hurt anybody.

Excuse me,
I'll be right back.

Just one second.

For the love of god, Jason,
read the room.

What?

[Sighs]

[Muttering]

You want me to say
you're having an early night?

No.

I think they'd understand.

You know, maybe
we should just tell them.

Tell them?

I don't want a pity party. Jason? You
might as well send out a press release.

What's happening to my life?

I'm going to fade away, and you're
all just going to go on without me.

I won't.

Yes, honey, you will.

I am so sorry.

My husband-- bless his heart,
i love him to death,

but he's got the emotional
sensitivity of a walnut.

You know,
i knew there'd be a change.

I just-- I didn't expect this.

Is she okay?

You know, sh--

it's been hard since the move.

And...

-Eva?
-Sh--

okay, whoa-whoa-whoa, Eva.

If there's something
going on with Lainey,

it's going on with you, too.

And whether or not
she wants to talk about it,

you might,
and you have a say.

Honey, what's going on?

There she is.

I was just saying how great it
is with you guys here

and my parents
further up the coast,

and they're at that age.

I'm going to be
driving by a lot.

Well, thanks for coming by
and checking on your lady here.

Absolutely.
One more time, give me a hug.

-Oh, yeah.
-I miss you.

Oh, miss you.

Oh, man, it was a pleasure

to love you and hate you
and fight with you

for the last 20 years.

And I'm glad to leave you
in this beautiful place

with, of course,
this beautiful woman.

-Give me a hug.
-Oh.

She was a nightmare
before she met you.

-I'm just saying.
-[Eva laughing]

-Bye, honey.
-Bye.

Thank you so much.
This was really lovely.

-I'll see you soon.
-Okay.

-Okay. Take me home.
-All right.

Take me home.

-Safe travels.
-[Val] Bye, everyone.

You told her.

Lainey, I'm sorry.

I'm really sorry.

I just needed
to talk to someone.

I'm trying really hard

to appreciate
every second with you.

But I can't help it.

You know, i-i--

I can't help thinking about

one day looking in your eyes

and-- and you'll be gone.

So how do we do that?

How do we--

how do we not live

like we're just waiting
for you to disappear?

I don't know,

'cause it's exactly
what we're doing, right?

-Where are you going?
-You know what? You're right.

That's what this is.

We both don't have to go
through that.

You certainly don't have
to go through that.

-Oh, my god. -I should just pack
my things while I still can.

I should just tell you
not to feel guilty

-while I still can.
-Don't do that.

That is not what I want,

but I need to tell how I feel,

and I have to tell you
when it's hard.

You don't think that I know
that this is hard?

Of course you know.

And you know I love you,
but I still tell you.

I j-- i-- I am--

I'm scared.

What was your plan?

To just never talk about this?

About all of the things
that are going to happen?

-Is that what you want?
-That's what I want.

I want this thing
to swallow me up whole

without discussing it
every 15 minutes

and how it's going to feel
for both of us.

That's good. Thank you.

She has Alzheimer's.

How do you know?

Hal stopped being
able to write, too.

He'd leave me note,

and he'd think
it made perfect sense,

but they weren't letters
anymore.

And she left the "valley."

She was Vivian.

She never would've left
if she didn't have to.

Well, this is familiar,
but I think you should be naked.

So should you.

I could handle
being banished from Eden

if I was with you.

That's because
we can handle anything.

We wouldn't be any good
at populating the earth.

Well, even if we could,

half of them would be demented

by the time they were 50.

I'm sorry.

I was being selfish.

I don't want people to know,

but maybe you need them
to know.

Sometimes I think
it would just be easier

if I took a little walk
out into the pacific.

Don't say that.

Put one of those big
red things in my pocket.

No, honey, you need something
heavier than a pomegranate.

See, you have to
want it to end.

I don't want it to end.

I would see
your beautiful face,

and my legs
would just start kicking.

[Chuckles]

So here's the part where
i should tell you that

when the time comes,
you should find someone

to make you happy.

But then you would know there was
something seriously wrong with me.

Yeah.
No, I know what to do.

Clutch a rosary and wear a black
veil for the rest of my life.

The fewer people to see that
face, the better, thank you.

There's just so much
i want to do.

The time we have left

can still mean something.

That is so beautiful.

Did you read that
in a greeting card?

Yes, the Alzheimer's section
of the drugstore,

-smartass.
-Oh.

What I meant to say

was that I have to believe
that you can still feel happy

even if you don't
remember why.

So we devote ourselves
to a happy now.

A million of them.

Okay, I've never had one
of those apples on a stick.

Like a caramel apple?

-Is that what they call them?
-Yeah.

Yeah, i-- okay.

Well, take it easy.

I'm not a magician.

What else?

I think you should get
a tattoo of my face.

-Right...
-About here.

Yeah.

I feel like I should explain
to you what a bucket list is.

It is not a list of things
you make other people do.

That doesn't seem right.

Yeah.

[Soft music playing]

Okay. Here we go.

A very small bite...

[Laughing]

Yeah.

? it's been
a long time coming ?

? I've been a long time
running from myself ?

-[chattering]
-? those demons in my soul

[squealing]

? all I wanted was some time

? to maybe change
your lonely mind ?

? but there are things
that even I can't control ?

? I never was the best
at moving on ?

? all this time I've just been
trying to get along ?

? keep my spirits strong

? still I'm holding on
to you ?

isn't it weird...

That I will stop existing,

and you'll still be here?

And then tomorrow
will be tomorrow,

but I'm not going to be in it.

Was that downer?

-Yeah, just...
-A little bit of a downer?

Sorry about that.
All right, all right.

-Then I have a question.
-Okay.

How many people--

and I need, like,
a firm number on this one--

have looked up at those stars

and contemplated
their existence?

And now they're, like...

[Makes sputtering sound]

...dead and gone?

Yeah, yeah.

Just mull that over,
will you?

No, it's five.

Oh, you seem mighty sure
of yourself.

It's five. Oh, actually i
might be low-balling that.

It's maybe, like, seven.

Seven people.

You sound so sure.

I'm positive.

Good, you've checked out
my question.

I'm smart.

You don't know.

I'm super smart,

like, especially right now.

Extra...

[Chattering]

It's not what I want,

but everyone we've spoken to

says we need to do this sooner
rather than later.

It's not like you to be
so defeatist.

You know, without this

I am no one.

Good morning.

Coffee and a muffin.

Give me a sec.

Is it true that Lainey Allen
lives around here?

I don't have
any coffee or muffins.

You might do better
somewhere else.

Great.
Maybe you will tomorrow.

Oh, my lord.

The truth
is better than this.

Yes.

Well, hal wouldn't
let me tell anyone

for the first six months.

It was his pride.

I mean,
he was such a good person,

and I think--

I think you would've really
liked him before.

And I know
he would've liked you.

In the end,
we're all the same.

-Morning.
-Morning.

-Uh, let me.
-I can-- I got it.

I know. I know.

-I can button my own shirt.
-I know you can.

You are--

you're not going
to be happy with me.

You know, I just--

what?

I felt like--

you know, i-- I had to...

[Chuckles]

It's t-- it's time.

You ran this morning.

They say that exercise
can slow down the progression.

That's great, that's great. But you're
going to run yourself into the ground.

I can do something,
can't I?

Okay, it's excessive.

-Can you please just sit and
relax for a second? -Really?

I'm not dead.

[Panting]

Oh, that's a relief.

I thought
you were watching porn.

"Preserving memories."

See that face?

That's-- that's why I didn't
want to show you.

We can make a book.

-Really?
-Mm-hmm.

A video diary.

It's a good thing you'll
have all that screen time

to remember me by.

Mm-hmm.

Any time I want to see you
marry a strange man,

I know exactly where to go.

Okay. You got me there.

[Clears throat]

[Taps button]

Dear diary...

Hard day...

But with the support

of the most amazing woman
in the world,

there's nothing I can't face.

There isn't a day
that isn't worth living.

There isn't a moment

that goes by
that I'm not grateful

to be loved by her.

And I would give anything

to have infinite moments
with her,

but because
that's not something

that I or medical science

apparently can figure out,

I'm just going to
have to try to enjoy

the time I do have with her...

In all its imperfect
perfectness.

I love you.

-Jeez. Blah, blah, blah.
-[Laughs]

Say something worth keeping.

[Muffled country music
playing]

[Music continues]

-Hi.
-Hey.

Could I get a vodka tonic

with a squeeze of lime,
please?

I'll have a gin and tonic.

Coming right up.

See? This is fun.

This was a good idea.

There's only so much
sitting at home

and reading Internet articles
you can do.

I don't know why you do that.

'Cause knowledge is power.

Well, here's to
blissful ignorance.

We may not have a memory book,
but we do have right now.

Give me a shout
if you need anything else.

The night is young.

You know, that's what I say
to her every night

right before
i take her to bed.

No, the drinks are actually
on the gentleman over there.

Oh, I'd forgotten
how much fun this could be.

Well, he's coming over,
so just be nice.

I know.

-Good evening.
-Good evening.

Hi.

Um, I'm not the kind of guy

to send a woman a drink,

but you are one
of the most beautiful women

that I have ever seen.

That's what I thought
when I first saw her.

Thank you.
That's nice.

So what brings you girls
out tonight?

Probably the same as you--

you know, meet a hot
brunette, get lucky.

[Chuckles]

I'm Mike.

Oh, Eva.

Mike. It's a pretty name.

And you seem like
a real winner,

so I'm going to give you
a piece of advice.

You're going to have to float a lot
more of these drinks around here

because I've already met
my hot brunette,

and she's sitting right here.

Well, if you decide
you'd like to join us, then--

persistent fucker, Mike.

Am I being unclear?

Back off!

Whoa. Okay, sorry.

-Have a good night.
-You, too.

-Crazy bitch.
-You have no idea.

What? What?

That was classy. Really.
That's good.

Here's to ten
more beautiful years

with fucking dipshits in bars.

Drink.

-Drink it or I will.
-I don't want it.

Drink it.

Um, we're leaving.

But the night is young.

I think she's right.
It's time to go. You okay?

-Um--
-she's fine!

She's fine!

Come on.

You need saving, honey?

Then you stay here.

What the hell's with them?

That was all you.

You were acting like
a crazy person in there.

If I didn't know you,
I'd be scared for me.

Well, excuse me
if I don't wanna spend

one of the precious few nights
we have together

watching a bunch
of dive bar horn dogs

hitting on you.

I could've handled it.

Well, like I said,
you have a problem with me,

go talk to your new friends.

-What's happening?
-He pissed me off, Eva.

He would've always
pissed me off.

No, you used to smile and wait
till I said I was with you

'cause however jealous
you were,

you knew who
i was going home with.

That wasn't you.
That was ugly.

Well, based on all
the reading you've done,

you should know
that there is no more me.

That's all changed.
It's all gonna change. Okay?

So I guess what I am
now is ugly.

Don't-- don't look
at me like that.

Look at you like what?

Don't give me that look,
that worried look.

It's always so worried.

I'm so sick of that face.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

What's happening to me?

[Sighs]

I can't imagine a day where
i won't know that I love you.

Where's it all go?

I do know
that I'll always think

that you are the most beautiful
woman in the world.

How's that for positive?

It's really good.

It'll be like seeing you for
the first time every day.

Pretty.

Pretty. Pretty.

Pretty.

[Knock on door]

-[Knock on door]
-What?

Oh, surprise.

Hope I'm not interrupting.

No, no, no. Please, please.

Hi.

Who is this?

I'm kidding. I'm sorry.
I couldn't resist.

-Oh, god.
-That wasn't funny.

Val's laughing.

-I don't care.
-I'm sorry.

Oh, baby, I'm sorry.

Oh, oh, oh.

-I'm sor--
-it's fine.

Just-- it's a relief--
I'm relieved.

Please don't ever do
that again.

Well, this is a nice surprise.

Yeah. Well, you know,
i was, um--

I was just passing 'cause,
you know, i-- I went--

I'm just lying.

I-- I had to check
on my two favorite girls.

[Chuckling]

Well, I wish I'd had known. I
would've dressed for the occasion.

-Well, you look lovely.
-Thank you.

It's going to be
an early evening for me, though.

-You okay?
-I'm tired.

Are you kidding?

You two have a catch up and
I'll see you in the morning.

Don't stay up too late, kids.

Okay.

[Sighs]
I love you.

-I know.
-Thank you.

-[Laughing]
-Give me this.

It's too soon.

Good.

But it won't be forever.

Eva, honey, you are
a brave and wonderful girl,

and I know you will do
everything you can...

But I also know
how much you love her,

so...

I'm worried that you
won't know when to say...

Enough is enough.

Her long-term memories--

perfect, sharp as ever.

Well, then just stick them
in a drawer

and forget they're there.

But just remember

that when it does get
to be too much,

everybody will understand.

As long as there's a glimpse
of the Lainey I know,

she stays.

She can be a handful
at the best of times.

I'm still glad every day
they're my hands.

That's beautiful.

That really is.
That's so beautiful.

-You're tipsy.
-I mean...

Let's have more.

[Music playing]

? static voices surround me

? choruses annoy me

? no song sounds sweet
anymore ?

? they say you're faithful

? but are you really
that faithful? ?

? 'cause I haven't been
here before ?

? I wanna be alone with you

? I got lost in the night

? and your whispers

? they gently show me
i belong ?

? next to you

[vocalizing]

? I wanna be alone with you

? I got lost

? in the night

? I wanna belong to you

? I

? got lost in the night

? got lost in the night

? got lost in

? the night

I think we should find
a place for me.

When the time comes,

you don't need to--

to do this all by yourself.

You know, if you--

we should pick a date.

Let's pick a date,

and that way you don't get
a say when it's too much.

When I'm too much.

Let's find a place,

and on that day I'll go.

No. I think we should wait
and we'll see--

-we'll see how--
-no.

Our special-care unit
is very secure.

Only the staff members
have access codes.

We're very careful here.

In case one of them tries
to make a break for it?

Uh...

Is there some place outside

for the inmates to go?

In-habitants.

Residents.

Patients can request to be
taken out to the gardens

at certain times of day
if they choose.

We have lovely gardens.

That's important-- fresh air.

For mom, so she can shake
that winter pallor.

We keep our patients
as comfortable as possible.

We do try to keep medication
to a minimum

unless absolutely necessary.

Have you had trouble
with night wandering?

-No.
-No.

Well, it's very common.

It'll likely develop.

We recommend putting a bell
on the front door.

Like a jingle bell?

Well, why stop there?

Why don't you just throw on
a cat collar or a cowbell?

[Laughs]

We do sedate
the night wanderers

for their safety.

Wow, that's just...

Barbaric, really.

It's-- it's...

We're a barbaric country.

No, i-- I do not
want to be sedated.

Okay? I mean, just push me out
on a fucking ice floe.

Okay?
That would be more humane.

All right? Look at them
wandering around jabbering.

Who wants to see a person
live like that?

Who?

Sorry. I tried.
I really did.

-I know.
-What is with the smell?

They all smell like cabbage.

What?

Why are you laughing?

I-- because--
because you're fighting,

and I haven't seen you fight
in so long,

and there you were,

just railing on that poor
woman that you just met

and I'm happy.

-Totally unreasonable.
-Totally unreasonable

and so you.

"The night wanderer."

That'll be the title
of my memoir.

[Both laughing]

You're, um--

we're here to take
a look around.

I'm Eva and you are...

Staring.

Okay.

-Hi.
-Hi.

It's a real pleasure
to meet you.

[Giggling]
Excited!

Sorry. Unprofessional.

Um, I'm mindy.

And I'm just really excited
to meet you.

[Laughs]
Oh, god.

I've watched you every day
for, like, years.

Everybody here has.
Um, the TV goes on

at 1:00 on the dot
without fail.

There'd be a mutiny
if it didn't.

[Giggling]

[Sighs] God-- oh, your
story with Todd--

oh, hands down my
favorite couple in the show.

You know,
we were properly devastated

when they said
you were leaving.

Um, and I still think,
you know,

you should've gone with him.

I mean, Mariam, I don't wanna
use the b-word,

but she doesn't deserve him.

She never will.

Oh!

Welcome to cedar crest,

your first choice
in assisted living.

How can I help you?

I would not have thought anything
could make that experience

any more uncomfortable.

Mindy did!

I have a feeling.
This is the one.

"Meadowlark."

Why do they have to make it
sound so fucking pleasant?

I think it's nice.

You would.

Can you just...

You were going to tell me
to be positive, weren't you?

Maybe.

Mm, I don't like it.

Okay.

That's okay.

Should we maybe see the inside
before we go?

Place looks like
a fucking kindergarten

crossed with a new age
rock singing church

-ready to make me
grateful or-- -Lainey.

What?

You're welcome to sing.

Being grateful,
that's optional.

Hi, I'm Kate.

We're here shopping
for my future cage,

not for my body, mind you,
just for my mind.

It'll be up there
with the fairies.

Do you have something
like that, Kate?

Lainey, right?

Will you let me show
you around?

Why don't you follow me?

I hate pink flannel sheets.

So we can change them.

Thank you. I think her first
impression is okay, at least.

I'm sorry if we didn't make
a very good one.

She's never been shy.
Oh, my god.

No need to apologize.

I don't apologize for
the things I can't control.

Thank you very much.

My pleasure.

[Muttering]

Have you seen the keys
to the deck door?

I don't know.

Every day I have to hunt
for them,

literally every single day.

Can you please just ask
for my help?

Don't keep moving them around

if you can't remember
where you put them.

So much time spent looking
for things in my own house.

How about we just
always keep them in the door?

Okay? Can we do that?

So where do you think
you might have put them?

I-i don't know.
I don't know.

Okay, well, if you can't
manage by yourself,

-don't try.
-I can manage.

You can't manage.
Every single day

I'm wondering,
can she remember that?

Can she remember that?
Can she remember today?

But it doesn't even matter.
Everything I say doesn't matter

because tomorrow you forget.

[Woman on tv]
Some low cloud and dense fog

in coastal areas
and inland valleys.

And this system could also
bring us a few light showers.

It looks like
late Wednesday night

and Thursday have the highest
chance of precipitation.

Fog may be coming in
in some areas,

causing low visibility,

so be careful
if you have to drive,

especially
in the overnight hours.

The good news
is that it should warm up

and clear out by the weekend,

giving us a brighter
and warmer start to next week.

[Woman 2 on tv]
Thanks, jan.

So there you have it.

With any luck, things will be
looking up by the weekend.

[Eva] Hey.

Would it be okay
if I run to the store? Yeah?

[Man on tv] A dog a hundred
miles from his home

finds his way
across the country

to be reunited with his owner.

How? We'll have
all your top stories,

plus the details of that
heartwarming reunion at 5:00.

[Woman 2]
That's all from us.

For Dan and
the entire news team,

thanks for joining us.

I'm Mary shapiro.

[Man]
And I'm Chris Dean.

"Valley Springs" is up next.

Have a great afternoon.

[Theme music playing]

[No audible dialogue]

Can you please
just ask for my help?

If you can't manage
by yourself,

-don't try.
-I can manage.

Everything I say doesn't matter
because tomorrow your forget.

Lainey!

Well, I've had three husbands
and no complaints.

[Laughs]

Well, don't get burnt
by the same flame twice.

Where's the fun in that?

You see, my dignity
took a knock with the boys

last time you were here.

Thought you might want
to apologize.

Well, I'm going
to knock it again

because I don't remember.

So do you, like,
go off on every innocent guy

trying to buy
a pretty girl a drink,

or you're just not willing
to apologize?

You have
another thing coming.

You're gonna have to...

I--

how about we start
with you inviting me to sit?

You don't know where you end
and the character begins.

No.

Thank you.

Now, come on.

I told them I was coming
over here to make amends.

Seems you owe me that.

I don't remember you.

I'm Mike.

Oh, I'd forgotten
how much fun this could be.

M-Mike.

Where's your friend?

I have to go.

Slow down.

Wanna come inside?

Val, can you take her?

Thank you.
Thank you so much.

How did you find her?

Well, small town.

You know, like I said,
everyone knows me.

And I may have mentioned
when you first arrived

that we were friendly.

So, Dan, when he thought
she might be in trouble...

She is in trouble, Eva.

She could get hurt.

You can't leave her alone.

And I understand you can't
possibly watch her

every minute of every day,

but we got lucky today.

We might not next time.

Oh, come here.

I'm here for you.

Thank you.

-Vivian. -Were you
expecting someone else?

I wanted to believe you had
changed. I really did.

When you came back to
the valley with your stories

about how things
were going to be different...

Vivian's about to kill Katy.

You may have pulled the wool
over everyone else's eyes,

but not mine.

You don't want
what's best for ed.

You want what's best
for yourself.

It would break him to know
that you were here.

-It really would.
-Are you going to tell him?

[Vivian] Give me one
reason why I shouldn't?

[Katy] Well, I don't see why
you'd want to hurt him that way.

[Vivian]
Me?

[Katy]
You said it yourself.

It would break him.

[Vivian] Then you should've
thought about that

before you came running back

when no one good and trusting

would fall
for your pathetic act.

[Katy] I think we both
have secrets, Vivian.

Oh, not like you.

I have more decency
in my worst mistakes

than you have
in your finest moments.

I won't let you do this.

Oh, really?

-Get your hands off of me!
-Tell me about it!

There isn't a moment
that goes by

that I'm not grateful
to be loved by her.

And I would give anything

to have infinite moments
like that with her.

But because
that's not something

that I or medical science

apparently can figure out,

I'm just going to
have to try to enjoy

the time I do have with her...

In all its imperfect
perfectness.

I love you.

You ready to go?

I-- um...

Shall I?

You're always beautiful.

[Chuckles]

Lainey?
Look who's here to see you.

Hi.

Look.

These are the, um...

Lights.

Um, this is, uh...

You feel like you can fly.

And this, um...

It's the net.

And this is, um...

Um...

You won that.

I did?

Yes, you did.

And I was so proud of you.

You're beautiful.

I'm sure you hear that
all the time,

but I'm-- I'm spoken for,

so I...

Think it's okay if I say that.

Will you come visit again?

Of course I will.

[Music playing]

? take my hand

? take me back in time

? to remember whens

? that I've left behind

? there's an endless haze

? of days to come

? and so far
I've been wasting mine ?

? on wars that can't be won

? take me home

? take me where you are

? 'cause the world
I've known ?

? has been getting dark

? can you ease the fear

? knocking at my door

? that when I wake,
my worst mistakes ?

? won't haunt me anymore

? it's do or die

? what little time we have

? but stay awhile

? we'll try to make
this last ?

? 'cause every second passed

? is just a chance

? out of our reach

? so I'll keep living
in the moment ?

? till it's all
that's left of me ?

? take my love

? keep it safe somewhere

? when I lose myself

? you can find me there

? when I can't be strong

? will you still know

? the heart inside's
the heart ?

? that I have called my own?

? it's do or die

? what little time we have

? but stay awhile

? we'll try to make
this last ?

? it's do or die

? what little time we have

? but stay awhile

? we'll try
to make this last ?

? 'cause every second passed

? is just a chance

? out of our reach

? so I'll keep living
in the moment ?

? till it's all
that's left of me ?

? I'll keep living
in the moment ?

? till it's all
that's left of me ?