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1
00:00:12,345 --> 00:00:17,725
[upbeat music]
2
00:00:17,726 --> 00:00:19,143
Hey Chels!
- Hey!
3
00:00:19,144 --> 00:00:20,686
Happy birthday!
4
00:00:20,687 --> 00:00:21,729
How'd you know it
was my birthday?
5
00:00:21,730 --> 00:00:23,605
Oh, Jenn Conch told
me about your party.
6
00:00:23,606 --> 00:00:25,482
Are you fucking kidding me?
7
00:00:25,483 --> 00:00:26,775
[phone dinging]
8
00:00:26,776 --> 00:00:28,319
Oh, from Jenn Conch!
9
00:00:28,320 --> 00:00:29,403
Wow!
10
00:00:29,404 --> 00:00:32,114
"Chelsea's surprise very
special milestone fortieth.
11
00:00:32,115 --> 00:00:34,283
"Shh! It's tonight.
12
00:00:34,284 --> 00:00:35,951
"Don't say anything to her."
13
00:00:35,952 --> 00:00:37,578
I guess she CC'd
you by accident.
14
00:00:37,579 --> 00:00:39,121
[phone dinging]
Another one incoming.
15
00:00:39,122 --> 00:00:40,748
This time it's a reply all.
16
00:00:40,749 --> 00:00:42,166
[in Jenn's voice]
"Oopsies! Tee Hee!
17
00:00:42,167 --> 00:00:44,126
"How do you take
someone off an email?"
18
00:00:44,127 --> 00:00:45,544
If she had two brains
she'd be twice as stupid.
19
00:00:45,545 --> 00:00:46,545
Oh, oh, whoa, whoa, whoa!
20
00:00:46,546 --> 00:00:47,504
There's more.
21
00:00:47,505 --> 00:00:49,882
This time she forwarded
it to the IT department.
22
00:00:49,883 --> 00:00:53,093
"How do I scrub my
entire email history
23
00:00:53,094 --> 00:00:54,970
"from the beginning of time?"
24
00:00:54,971 --> 00:00:56,555
Here comes the brainiac now.
25
00:00:56,556 --> 00:00:58,099
Hey, Chels!
26
00:00:58,558 --> 00:01:00,684
So, a casual question.
27
00:01:00,685 --> 00:01:02,561
Uh, what are you up to tonight?
28
00:01:02,562 --> 00:01:05,773
Attending the surprise party
I'm not supposed to know about?
29
00:01:05,774 --> 00:01:07,399
Who told you?
30
00:01:07,400 --> 00:01:09,485
You did. A bunch of times.
31
00:01:09,486 --> 00:01:11,153
Okay, my laptop has
too many buttons
32
00:01:11,154 --> 00:01:12,404
so it's like a trap.
33
00:01:12,405 --> 00:01:13,822
Hey, I just wanted
to let you know
34
00:01:13,823 --> 00:01:16,200
I can't make to your
surprise party.
35
00:01:16,201 --> 00:01:18,160
It's my first annual
Meat'n Sauna Night.
36
00:01:18,161 --> 00:01:19,578
Yeah!
- Meat for six. We meet at six.
37
00:01:19,579 --> 00:01:21,830
Sorry, Jenn. A bunch
of us already RSVP'd
38
00:01:21,831 --> 00:01:22,998
to Taser's meat fest.
39
00:01:22,999 --> 00:01:24,333
It's gonna be awesome!
40
00:01:24,334 --> 00:01:25,376
What? Can I come?
41
00:01:25,377 --> 00:01:26,335
Oh my god, yes!
42
00:01:26,336 --> 00:01:27,461
Okay. [chuckling]
43
00:01:27,462 --> 00:01:30,589
Uh, Chelsea, you have to
attend your own surprise party.
44
00:01:30,590 --> 00:01:32,716
I'm just not really
a surprise person.
45
00:01:32,717 --> 00:01:35,177
Well, everybody secretly
wants a surprise party.
46
00:01:35,178 --> 00:01:36,178
Hmm...
- Uhhh...
47
00:01:36,179 --> 00:01:38,180
Well just cancel your party.
48
00:01:38,181 --> 00:01:39,181
What?
- [Todd] Why?
49
00:01:39,182 --> 00:01:40,599
Feels very cancellable, right?
50
00:01:40,600 --> 00:01:42,768
It's got that click
"Maybe I'm attending"
51
00:01:42,769 --> 00:01:44,770
but I'm probably
gonna bail energy.
52
00:01:44,771 --> 00:01:46,730
No way! I already dropped
the girls at their mom's
53
00:01:46,731 --> 00:01:48,565
and I've had ribs
smoking for a day now
54
00:01:48,566 --> 00:01:49,983
so they gotta be
eaten tonight.
55
00:01:49,984 --> 00:01:51,528
Nice!
56
00:01:52,070 --> 00:01:53,779
Well it's just that, uh,
57
00:01:53,780 --> 00:01:56,407
you know, I put a big
deposit down at The Pipe.
58
00:01:56,408 --> 00:01:57,574
[Todd sighing]
59
00:01:57,575 --> 00:02:02,913
[upbeat playful music]
60
00:02:02,914 --> 00:02:04,457
All right, I'll...
61
00:02:04,458 --> 00:02:06,291
come.
62
00:02:06,292 --> 00:02:07,668
[Jenn chuckling]
Sorry.
63
00:02:07,669 --> 00:02:09,211
It's gonna be really fun.
64
00:02:09,212 --> 00:02:11,588
It's just gonna be us
Conch gals, you know?
65
00:02:11,589 --> 00:02:12,923
Girls night!
- Meat night!
66
00:02:12,924 --> 00:02:13,924
Girls night!
67
00:02:13,925 --> 00:02:16,427
[in unison] Meat night!
- Girls night!
68
00:02:16,428 --> 00:02:17,970
Girls night!
- Meat night!
69
00:02:17,971 --> 00:02:18,929
Gotcha.
70
00:02:18,930 --> 00:02:19,972
[Todd].
Good one.
71
00:02:19,973 --> 00:02:21,265
[Taser] Meat smash!
- Oh.
72
00:02:21,266 --> 00:02:22,266
[Taser].
Meat night!
73
00:02:22,267 --> 00:02:23,225
[Todd].
Have fun tonight, girls!
74
00:02:23,226 --> 00:02:24,226
Sad I'm gonna miss.
75
00:02:24,227 --> 00:02:25,812
[Chelsea].
Fuck you, Todd!
76
00:02:30,108 --> 00:02:31,984
Who keeps stealing my lasagna?
77
00:02:31,985 --> 00:02:33,610
Do I look like
Garfield's bitch?
78
00:02:33,611 --> 00:02:34,820
That's exactly what
you look like.
79
00:02:34,821 --> 00:02:36,655
A hundred fucking percent.
80
00:02:36,656 --> 00:02:38,449
Luckily, I brought
my backup spaghetti.
81
00:02:38,450 --> 00:02:40,320
[microwave beeping]
Four minutes!
82
00:02:42,572 --> 00:02:44,621
Ice fucking cold.
83
00:02:44,622 --> 00:02:45,622
[everyone groaning]
84
00:02:45,623 --> 00:02:46,790
Out of the way.
- The fuck?
85
00:02:46,791 --> 00:02:48,959
You can't just bud in line.
86
00:02:48,960 --> 00:02:50,502
Oh what? All of a sudden
you're an electrician?
87
00:02:50,503 --> 00:02:51,462
Yeah.
88
00:02:51,463 --> 00:02:52,421
[Steph].
Oh, that's the good duct tape.
89
00:02:52,422 --> 00:02:53,630
Why is a carp fixing
the microwave?
90
00:02:53,631 --> 00:02:55,841
So I can do whatever I want.
91
00:02:55,842 --> 00:02:57,676
Just help yourself.
No, no, no [indistinct]-
92
00:02:57,677 --> 00:02:59,887
Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa!
93
00:02:59,888 --> 00:03:01,930
Guys, lots of
backseat workers here.
94
00:03:01,931 --> 00:03:03,974
Don't see any of you
lifting a finger to fix it.
95
00:03:03,975 --> 00:03:05,851
Who the hell
microwaves egg salad?
96
00:03:05,852 --> 00:03:07,269
You eat your
Cheetos with milk!
97
00:03:07,270 --> 00:03:08,772
[everyone gasping]
98
00:03:09,647 --> 00:03:10,814
[upbeat music]
99
00:03:10,815 --> 00:03:13,650
Oh, hey Audrey, here you are!
100
00:03:13,651 --> 00:03:15,277
Uh, kind of busy.
Microwave exploded.
101
00:03:15,278 --> 00:03:16,487
I'm not stealing it.
102
00:03:16,488 --> 00:03:19,698
So I need you to help me with
Chelsea's surprise party.
103
00:03:19,699 --> 00:03:21,450
She's not really a
surprise person so...
104
00:03:21,451 --> 00:03:22,451
[Jenn].
I know.
105
00:03:22,452 --> 00:03:25,954
All the more reason to
double the fuck down,
106
00:03:25,955 --> 00:03:27,122
you know?
107
00:03:27,123 --> 00:03:31,043
So I need you to pick her up
and take her to the venue.
108
00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:32,503
Ms. Conch!
- Ummmmm...
109
00:03:32,504 --> 00:03:35,005
You cc'd Chelsea on the
surprise party email!
110
00:03:35,006 --> 00:03:36,548
I know that, Janet.
111
00:03:36,549 --> 00:03:39,385
Don't hinder me. Help me.
112
00:03:39,386 --> 00:03:41,345
Just pitch me some
fun party ideas.
113
00:03:41,346 --> 00:03:42,554
Penis straws!
114
00:03:42,555 --> 00:03:45,349
Yeah, um, [chuckles] I
went to a party once
115
00:03:45,350 --> 00:03:48,144
and there were penis straws
there and they were...
116
00:03:49,229 --> 00:03:50,354
a lot of fun.
117
00:03:50,355 --> 00:03:51,271
Penis straws.
118
00:03:51,272 --> 00:03:52,731
Well now you have
my attention.
119
00:03:52,732 --> 00:03:55,693
Okay. Are they bendy or...
120
00:03:55,694 --> 00:03:56,735
or rigid?
121
00:03:56,736 --> 00:03:58,529
Rigid.
122
00:03:58,530 --> 00:04:00,739
Rigid and, um, hot pink
123
00:04:00,740 --> 00:04:03,534
and kind of, uh, curved
at the end, like...
124
00:04:03,535 --> 00:04:04,994
almost like a question mark.
125
00:04:04,995 --> 00:04:06,203
Like it was asking
126
00:04:06,204 --> 00:04:08,330
do you want another
spicy margarita?
127
00:04:08,331 --> 00:04:09,707
Yes I do, Mr. Straw?
128
00:04:09,708 --> 00:04:10,749
[both chuckling]
129
00:04:10,750 --> 00:04:11,750
[Janet].
Yes!
130
00:04:11,751 --> 00:04:13,252
Um, well, Chelsea's gay
131
00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:16,922
so maybe don't hand her a drink
with a tiny plastic dick on it.
132
00:04:16,923 --> 00:04:18,382
Good point.
133
00:04:18,383 --> 00:04:20,342
I will drink them.
I will drink them all.
134
00:04:20,343 --> 00:04:22,344
All right, expedite
those now, Janet.
135
00:04:22,345 --> 00:04:23,429
Okay.
- Come on.
136
00:04:23,430 --> 00:04:26,724
I will see you and Chelsea
tonight at the party.
137
00:04:26,725 --> 00:04:27,891
Okay? Pick her up.
138
00:04:27,892 --> 00:04:29,561
Oh my god!
139
00:04:30,270 --> 00:04:31,353
Fuck my life!
140
00:04:31,354 --> 00:04:32,396
[Homer].
Shit!
141
00:04:32,397 --> 00:04:33,731
[Todd].
Where the fuck you taking us, Tase?
142
00:04:33,732 --> 00:04:36,358
Ooh! Wait till you see what
I got you for tonight, boys.
143
00:04:36,359 --> 00:04:37,776
[Todd].
What's with the fucking hat?
144
00:04:37,777 --> 00:04:39,028
It's a banya.
145
00:04:39,029 --> 00:04:40,029
[Homer].
You look like Sherlock Holmes in the bathtub.
146
00:04:40,030 --> 00:04:41,196
Jesus Christ!
- [Taser] Look it up.
147
00:04:41,197 --> 00:04:43,615
[chuckles] There she is.
148
00:04:43,616 --> 00:04:46,410
[chuckles] There's no fucking
way that's up to code.
149
00:04:46,411 --> 00:04:47,953
Yeah. My code.
150
00:04:47,954 --> 00:04:49,580
I'm just kinda doing
my own thing. Come on!
151
00:04:49,581 --> 00:04:51,749
Does it even have a
carbon monoxide detector?
152
00:04:51,750 --> 00:04:53,584
Pssh. Loser detectors
I call them.
153
00:04:53,585 --> 00:04:54,668
[Dewey].
Smells good.
154
00:04:54,669 --> 00:04:56,503
[Todd].
You know, we could just call 911 now
155
00:04:56,504 --> 00:04:57,588
and save them a trip later.
156
00:04:57,589 --> 00:04:59,214
[Dewey].
It's already so sweaty in here.
157
00:04:59,215 --> 00:05:00,591
Yeah, can you pre-book
an ambulance?
158
00:05:00,592 --> 00:05:01,967
Come on, man, the
heat's good for ya.
159
00:05:01,968 --> 00:05:04,386
Ohh. Nice touch, Tase.
160
00:05:04,387 --> 00:05:05,804
[Todd].
Where the hell did you get these?
161
00:05:05,805 --> 00:05:06,764
Not bad.
162
00:05:06,765 --> 00:05:09,600
Imperial Valley Hotel Express.
163
00:05:09,601 --> 00:05:11,643
Nothing but the best
for my buds, right?
164
00:05:11,644 --> 00:05:13,812
Steam, sweat and eat ribs!
165
00:05:13,813 --> 00:05:15,981
Yeah buddy!
- Oh ho ho ho! Yeah!
166
00:05:15,982 --> 00:05:17,232
Hey, turn up the music!
167
00:05:17,233 --> 00:05:18,609
[upbeat rock music]
168
00:05:18,610 --> 00:05:20,277
Oh yeah.
Those look amazing!
169
00:05:20,278 --> 00:05:22,780
Yeah, boys, I'll throw some
more logs on the fire.
170
00:05:22,781 --> 00:05:25,824
[muffled upbeat music]
171
00:05:25,825 --> 00:05:27,451
[chuckling and chattering]
172
00:05:27,452 --> 00:05:29,453
Could we get some
frozen margs, please?
173
00:05:29,454 --> 00:05:30,496
Make it three.
174
00:05:30,497 --> 00:05:33,082
Sorry, Senorita. No ice.
175
00:05:33,083 --> 00:05:34,458
Machine es muerta.
176
00:05:34,459 --> 00:05:35,459
Machine no work.
177
00:05:35,460 --> 00:05:36,460
Machine no work?
178
00:05:36,461 --> 00:05:37,836
This is a bar!
179
00:05:37,837 --> 00:05:40,839
And yet this is where we
find ourselves, sans glace.
180
00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:42,424
They're here!
They're here.
181
00:05:42,425 --> 00:05:43,842
They're here. Everyone hide!
182
00:05:43,843 --> 00:05:44,802
Everyone hide!
183
00:05:44,803 --> 00:05:46,136
Hide, hide, hide, hide, hide!
184
00:05:46,137 --> 00:05:47,429
I cannot stress this enough.
185
00:05:47,430 --> 00:05:48,847
She knows about this.
186
00:05:48,848 --> 00:05:49,807
Woo!
- We're here.
187
00:05:49,808 --> 00:05:52,059
Surprise, surprise, surprise!
188
00:05:52,060 --> 00:05:53,185
Just what I wanted. [chuckles]
189
00:05:53,186 --> 00:05:54,353
[Audrey].
Don't you love it?!
190
00:05:54,354 --> 00:05:57,439
So, um, everyone come out,
come out wherever you are.
191
00:05:57,440 --> 00:05:58,691
Surprise.
192
00:05:58,692 --> 00:06:00,484
[half hearted] Surprise.
193
00:06:00,485 --> 00:06:02,069
[Bev].
Happy fucking birthday!
194
00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:03,320
Oh. Hi!
195
00:06:03,321 --> 00:06:05,698
Surprise!
- Oh!
196
00:06:05,699 --> 00:06:06,740
Penis straws!
197
00:06:06,741 --> 00:06:08,492
Ugh. Ah...
198
00:06:08,493 --> 00:06:09,953
So thoughtful.
199
00:06:10,704 --> 00:06:12,163
Thanks.
200
00:06:12,455 --> 00:06:15,290
[Todd].
Holy shit, my bag is sweating now.
201
00:06:15,291 --> 00:06:16,875
Oh god, I got the meat sweats.
202
00:06:16,876 --> 00:06:18,836
Todd, pass me a beer,
would ya?
203
00:06:18,837 --> 00:06:20,254
Here you go, bro.
204
00:06:20,255 --> 00:06:21,839
Get her in ya.
205
00:06:21,840 --> 00:06:23,090
Oh!
- [Dewey] Oh!
206
00:06:23,091 --> 00:06:24,717
Ahhhhhhhh!
- [Todd] That'll work too.
207
00:06:24,718 --> 00:06:25,884
[all chuckling]
208
00:06:25,885 --> 00:06:27,052
[Taser].
That'll cool ya off.
209
00:06:27,053 --> 00:06:29,013
Ahhh!
- That is a good idea.
210
00:06:29,014 --> 00:06:30,139
Do it, Dewey!
211
00:06:30,140 --> 00:06:32,307
My turn.
Yeah, yeah, yeah!
212
00:06:32,308 --> 00:06:33,267
[Todd].
Yeah, soak it, Dew!
213
00:06:33,268 --> 00:06:34,476
Ahhhhh!
214
00:06:34,477 --> 00:06:35,477
[Taser].
Come on, Dewey, whatcha got?
215
00:06:35,478 --> 00:06:36,562
This is the best ever! [laughs]
216
00:06:36,563 --> 00:06:38,022
[Taser].
Yes, Dewey!
217
00:06:38,023 --> 00:06:39,023
[Backwoods].
Hey, boys!
218
00:06:39,024 --> 00:06:40,107
Where's the meat?
219
00:06:40,108 --> 00:06:41,358
[Taser].
Hey, get in here!
220
00:06:41,359 --> 00:06:42,484
Close it up.
Keep the heat in.
221
00:06:42,485 --> 00:06:44,153
Oh! Oh, oh, oh.
I'm sorry I'm late.
222
00:06:44,154 --> 00:06:45,321
I'm ready to get crazy, boys.
223
00:06:45,322 --> 00:06:46,363
Where the fuck were you?
224
00:06:46,364 --> 00:06:47,865
Oh! I was at my duck blind.
225
00:06:47,866 --> 00:06:49,491
You pricks already started
eating without me?
226
00:06:49,492 --> 00:06:51,410
Another beer! Medium light!
227
00:06:51,411 --> 00:06:52,453
Getting rumbly
in your tumbly?
228
00:06:52,454 --> 00:06:53,537
Oh yes!
229
00:06:53,538 --> 00:06:55,748
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh. Oh.
- He's ready.
230
00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:57,082
[Homer].
Yeah! Yeah!
231
00:06:57,083 --> 00:06:59,918
[Todd]. Backwoods gets insane
when he's scarfing down ribs.
232
00:06:59,919 --> 00:07:00,878
[Taser].
Eat up, brother.
233
00:07:00,879 --> 00:07:02,254
There's more meat
where that came from.
234
00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:04,340
Holy shit, dude.
Pace yourself.
235
00:07:04,341 --> 00:07:06,451
Oh ho ho ho!
- [Homer] There's Meatwoods!
236
00:07:08,553 --> 00:07:09,720
[gentle music]
237
00:07:09,721 --> 00:07:10,929
Here we go.
238
00:07:10,930 --> 00:07:11,930
Oh yeah!
239
00:07:11,931 --> 00:07:12,931
Birthday girl.
240
00:07:12,932 --> 00:07:13,932
Nice!
241
00:07:13,933 --> 00:07:15,976
Boss of the birthday girl.
242
00:07:15,977 --> 00:07:17,227
[Janet].
Yes!
243
00:07:17,228 --> 00:07:18,270
And Janet.
244
00:07:18,271 --> 00:07:19,730
Don't post that, Janet.
245
00:07:19,731 --> 00:07:20,773
Too late!
246
00:07:20,774 --> 00:07:21,940
No, no, Janet...
247
00:07:21,941 --> 00:07:24,526
Our entertainment is
thirty seconds away.
248
00:07:24,527 --> 00:07:26,487
Who... who's thirty
seconds away?
249
00:07:26,488 --> 00:07:27,488
[Audrey].
What did you do?
250
00:07:27,489 --> 00:07:28,739
Brace yourselves, ladies.
251
00:07:28,740 --> 00:07:30,115
[Chelsea].
Oh, I don't like the sound of that.
252
00:07:30,116 --> 00:07:31,575
[Janet].
Okay, close your eyes.
253
00:07:31,576 --> 00:07:32,785
Come on, close your eyes.
- [Bev] No thanks.
254
00:07:32,786 --> 00:07:33,952
[Janet].
Come on, the surprise is almost here.
255
00:07:33,953 --> 00:07:35,537
I'm off duty.
- Okay.
256
00:07:35,538 --> 00:07:37,122
[Janet gasping]
[upbeat music]
257
00:07:37,123 --> 00:07:41,043
Ooh, high-tech.
258
00:07:41,044 --> 00:07:42,169
Yeah.
259
00:07:42,170 --> 00:07:45,089
It is like we're
at a rock concert.
260
00:07:45,090 --> 00:07:47,925
Ladies and ladies,
261
00:07:47,926 --> 00:07:49,510
happy Chelsea night!
262
00:07:49,511 --> 00:07:50,552
[upbeat music]
[people coughing]
263
00:07:50,553 --> 00:07:52,179
Open your eyes.
- Oh Jesus.
264
00:07:52,180 --> 00:07:53,806
Oh my god!
- [man] Good to go?
265
00:07:53,807 --> 00:07:55,140
[Janet].
Take it away!
266
00:07:55,141 --> 00:07:56,475
[upbeat music]
[women screaming]
267
00:07:56,476 --> 00:07:57,768
[Chelsea].
Oh god!
268
00:07:57,769 --> 00:07:58,727
No, no, no!
269
00:07:58,728 --> 00:07:59,979
[Billy].
Ladies!
270
00:07:59,980 --> 00:08:01,397
[Barb].
Oh, look at that butt!
271
00:08:01,398 --> 00:08:02,898
[Janet].
Surprise, Chelsea!
272
00:08:02,899 --> 00:08:03,982
[Chelsea].
Ugh.
273
00:08:03,983 --> 00:08:06,235
Billy? What the fuck?
274
00:08:06,236 --> 00:08:08,028
Ooh yeah!
- Ooh!
275
00:08:08,029 --> 00:08:09,822
[Backwoods].
I can't help myself around meat.
276
00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:11,156
Yeah, boy.
It doesn't look good.
277
00:08:11,157 --> 00:08:12,157
[Backwoods].
Makes me crazy.
278
00:08:12,158 --> 00:08:13,409
[Homer].
Is it the five pounds of meat
279
00:08:13,410 --> 00:08:14,451
or the twelve beer
you just drank?
280
00:08:14,452 --> 00:08:15,452
[Dewey].
Small sips.
281
00:08:15,453 --> 00:08:17,287
I think you're making it
worse, man. [chuckling]
282
00:08:17,288 --> 00:08:18,622
This will pass.
283
00:08:18,623 --> 00:08:21,125
I once had an uncle who ate
two rotisserie chickens
284
00:08:21,126 --> 00:08:23,001
in one sitting,
bones and all.
285
00:08:23,002 --> 00:08:24,670
He crushed a tall boy,
286
00:08:24,671 --> 00:08:26,255
burped for thirty seconds
287
00:08:26,256 --> 00:08:28,966
and then mowed the lawn like
nothing fucking happened.
288
00:08:28,967 --> 00:08:30,634
[loud burping]
289
00:08:30,635 --> 00:08:32,344
See? Progress.
290
00:08:32,345 --> 00:08:34,596
[Homer] Get it out.
- I still feel like shit.
291
00:08:34,597 --> 00:08:35,681
The food build-up
292
00:08:35,682 --> 00:08:37,182
must've reached his
lower stomach by now.
293
00:08:37,183 --> 00:08:39,476
We need to exercise
it out of him gently,
294
00:08:39,477 --> 00:08:40,602
like a baby.
295
00:08:40,603 --> 00:08:41,645
You better back up, bud.
296
00:08:41,646 --> 00:08:42,813
You better back up.
297
00:08:42,814 --> 00:08:44,398
[Homer].
Work with me. Come on!
298
00:08:44,399 --> 00:08:45,858
Okay.
299
00:08:45,859 --> 00:08:47,026
Cool, cool!
300
00:08:47,027 --> 00:08:49,445
Everyone's, uh,
looking loosey-goosey.
301
00:08:49,446 --> 00:08:50,612
Yeah. Good times?
302
00:08:50,613 --> 00:08:51,822
Hey, quick ask.
- What now?
303
00:08:51,823 --> 00:08:53,657
You fellas help me
move a small fridge?
304
00:08:53,658 --> 00:08:54,616
[Todd chuckling]
305
00:08:54,617 --> 00:08:55,617
[Backwoods farting]
306
00:08:55,618 --> 00:08:58,662
[everyone groaning]
[everyone gagging]
307
00:08:58,663 --> 00:08:59,830
Absolutely not.
308
00:08:59,831 --> 00:09:01,081
It's in my basement.
309
00:09:01,082 --> 00:09:03,834
We can move it up the back of my
steps to my garage real quick.
310
00:09:03,835 --> 00:09:04,877
Fuck you Taser!
311
00:09:04,878 --> 00:09:05,836
If we've got the momentum,
312
00:09:05,837 --> 00:09:07,296
then maybe we can get to
the L-shaped couch too.
313
00:09:07,297 --> 00:09:08,297
Not fucking happening!
314
00:09:08,298 --> 00:09:09,256
Fuck you!
315
00:09:09,257 --> 00:09:10,340
That's fair, that's fair.
316
00:09:10,341 --> 00:09:11,592
You do your thing,
you digest,
317
00:09:11,593 --> 00:09:13,635
but enjoy the freshly
scented room.
318
00:09:13,636 --> 00:09:15,012
See ya in five minutes.
319
00:09:15,013 --> 00:09:16,055
Fuck off!
320
00:09:16,056 --> 00:09:17,056
[Backwoods farting]
[retching and gagging]
321
00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:20,267
[woman cheering]
[upbeat music]
322
00:09:20,268 --> 00:09:21,685
Where'd you find him?
A parking lot?
323
00:09:21,686 --> 00:09:22,686
Uh, DudeDash.
324
00:09:22,687 --> 00:09:24,480
It's like a food delivery app
325
00:09:24,481 --> 00:09:26,315
but for erotic dancers.
326
00:09:26,316 --> 00:09:28,484
[giggling and cheering]
327
00:09:28,485 --> 00:09:30,069
Why?
- Sorry, Chels.
328
00:09:30,070 --> 00:09:31,028
I tried to tell them.
329
00:09:31,029 --> 00:09:32,237
Couldn't get a lady stripper?
330
00:09:32,238 --> 00:09:34,073
Oh I could have, yeah,
331
00:09:34,074 --> 00:09:35,240
but they were way
more expensive.
332
00:09:35,241 --> 00:09:38,285
And besides, he's
like a local talent.
333
00:09:38,286 --> 00:09:39,662
Oh and, uh, ladies,
334
00:09:39,663 --> 00:09:42,081
if, uh, you could
gimme a nice review,
335
00:09:42,082 --> 00:09:43,707
you know, it doesn't
have to be nothing long.
336
00:09:43,708 --> 00:09:45,876
Just like, you know,
I showed up on time,
337
00:09:45,877 --> 00:09:48,295
easy on the eyes,
you know, five stars.
338
00:09:48,296 --> 00:09:49,213
No stars!
339
00:09:49,214 --> 00:09:50,381
[Audrey].
This is not happening.
340
00:09:50,382 --> 00:09:51,673
Do you think she's having fun?
341
00:09:51,674 --> 00:09:52,675
[woman screaming]
342
00:09:52,676 --> 00:09:55,552
Hey Chels,
happy birthday, girlfriend!
343
00:09:55,553 --> 00:09:56,512
Woo!
344
00:09:56,513 --> 00:09:58,098
Living the dream.
345
00:09:59,099 --> 00:10:00,516
Call her "The Beast".
346
00:10:00,517 --> 00:10:02,352
Half appliance, half curse.
347
00:10:02,353 --> 00:10:05,270
She's been down here
fourteen years, boys.
348
00:10:05,271 --> 00:10:06,689
What?
349
00:10:06,690 --> 00:10:08,691
Nobody's moved her.
350
00:10:08,692 --> 00:10:10,693
Not because they didn't try,
351
00:10:10,694 --> 00:10:12,945
'cause she didn't
wanna be moved.
352
00:10:12,946 --> 00:10:14,738
She survived a flood,
353
00:10:14,739 --> 00:10:17,324
a blackout and a bear attack.
354
00:10:17,325 --> 00:10:18,742
Fuck!
- What kind of bear?
355
00:10:18,743 --> 00:10:20,077
Big!
- Hmm.
356
00:10:20,078 --> 00:10:21,912
She may give off
some chemical smell
357
00:10:21,913 --> 00:10:23,330
but she still makes ice.
358
00:10:23,331 --> 00:10:25,290
[Backwoods sniffing]
359
00:10:25,291 --> 00:10:26,250
And that noise.
360
00:10:26,251 --> 00:10:27,710
[Backwoods].
Chemical schmengler.
361
00:10:27,711 --> 00:10:29,044
It's how she talks.
362
00:10:29,045 --> 00:10:32,965
If you listen close,
she'll speak to you.
363
00:10:32,966 --> 00:10:34,717
[electricity humming]
364
00:10:34,718 --> 00:10:36,927
Uh...
[eerie chuckling]
365
00:10:36,928 --> 00:10:38,095
Sup motherfuckers!
366
00:10:38,096 --> 00:10:39,138
[everyone gasping]
367
00:10:39,139 --> 00:10:40,139
Oh my gosh!
368
00:10:40,140 --> 00:10:41,140
Medhi!
369
00:10:41,141 --> 00:10:42,141
The fuck were you, man?
370
00:10:42,142 --> 00:10:43,142
How was Sarnia?
371
00:10:43,143 --> 00:10:44,309
Uh, Namibia, actually.
372
00:10:44,310 --> 00:10:46,311
Uranium conference was
a total cock scratch
373
00:10:46,312 --> 00:10:47,312
but happy to be home.
374
00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:48,439
Where are all the kids?
375
00:10:48,440 --> 00:10:50,482
Kids? What kids?
376
00:10:50,483 --> 00:10:53,068
I wouldn't miss
Mary Francis' birthday, hmm?
377
00:10:53,069 --> 00:10:54,278
About that, Medhi.
378
00:10:54,279 --> 00:10:56,155
I just needed help
moving this fridge.
379
00:10:56,156 --> 00:10:57,406
What?
380
00:10:57,407 --> 00:10:58,699
He lured everyone here
381
00:10:58,700 --> 00:11:00,325
and love bombed us
with sauna ribs.
382
00:11:00,326 --> 00:11:01,326
Mmm.
383
00:11:01,327 --> 00:11:02,703
Yeah. You always ask
why I don't trust?
384
00:11:02,704 --> 00:11:04,121
This is why I don't trust.
385
00:11:04,122 --> 00:11:05,998
Oh come on. I've helped you
all move some sort of shit
386
00:11:05,999 --> 00:11:07,166
at some point or other.
387
00:11:07,167 --> 00:11:08,751
Don't even pretend
like I haven't.
388
00:11:08,752 --> 00:11:11,003
You helped me move
a small ottoman once
389
00:11:11,004 --> 00:11:12,629
and you kept the
fucking thing.
390
00:11:12,630 --> 00:11:13,630
Oh, that's where
that came from.
391
00:11:13,631 --> 00:11:15,674
Fuck it! Enough talk.
392
00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:17,593
These hernias aren't
gonna bulge themselves.
393
00:11:17,594 --> 00:11:19,178
The sooner we do this,
394
00:11:19,179 --> 00:11:20,637
the sooner we can get
back to drinking.
395
00:11:20,638 --> 00:11:21,597
Yes!
396
00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:22,556
[fridge thudding
and screeching]
397
00:11:22,557 --> 00:11:23,640
Oh!
- [Todd] What the?
398
00:11:23,641 --> 00:11:24,600
[Homer].
It's alive!
399
00:11:24,601 --> 00:11:26,643
She knows we're
coming for her.
400
00:11:26,644 --> 00:11:28,771
[fridge rattling]
401
00:11:28,772 --> 00:11:30,273
Fossil kit.
402
00:11:30,732 --> 00:11:32,316
Sweet.
403
00:11:32,317 --> 00:11:33,776
I need more meat.
404
00:11:33,777 --> 00:11:35,362
Is that a sausage?
405
00:11:36,613 --> 00:11:39,031
[Homer].
He's at stage eight: Hallucinations.
406
00:11:39,032 --> 00:11:40,741
Okay ladies,
break's almost over.
407
00:11:40,742 --> 00:11:41,742
Don't forg to tip.
408
00:11:41,743 --> 00:11:43,952
Oh, five stars for me, Billy.
409
00:11:43,953 --> 00:11:45,037
[Janet chuckling]
410
00:11:45,038 --> 00:11:46,498
What?
411
00:11:46,499 --> 00:11:47,790
What do you say?
412
00:11:47,791 --> 00:11:49,583
One more spin around the
horn for old time's sake?
413
00:11:49,584 --> 00:11:51,168
Hard pass. No.
414
00:11:51,169 --> 00:11:52,419
How hard?
415
00:11:52,420 --> 00:11:55,339
What? You in like a relationship
or like in love or something?
416
00:11:55,340 --> 00:11:58,050
[gasps] Oh, is it with that
dude down at the marina
417
00:11:58,051 --> 00:11:59,134
with the pet bald eagle?
418
00:11:59,135 --> 00:12:00,427
Who are you talking about?
419
00:12:00,428 --> 00:12:02,971
You know, the guy with the
like tattoos on his wing?
420
00:12:02,972 --> 00:12:04,640
How do you know that, Billy?
421
00:12:04,641 --> 00:12:08,727
[laughs] Everybody knows.
422
00:12:08,728 --> 00:12:09,937
You okay, buddy?
423
00:12:09,938 --> 00:12:12,773
[laughing] Yeah.
I've never been happier.
424
00:12:12,774 --> 00:12:14,275
Oh. Um...
425
00:12:14,686 --> 00:12:16,777
[Billy mumbling]
426
00:12:16,778 --> 00:12:18,529
Okay, I think I got it.
427
00:12:18,530 --> 00:12:19,738
What do you think?
- Aw!
428
00:12:19,739 --> 00:12:21,532
Come on, get your
fucking shit together.
429
00:12:21,533 --> 00:12:23,033
[Janet].
Posted!
430
00:12:23,034 --> 00:12:25,619
Anyway, you're, like,
sticking around?
431
00:12:25,620 --> 00:12:27,705
'Cause, like, I've got
this new number that I do,
432
00:12:27,706 --> 00:12:29,164
real showstopper.
433
00:12:29,165 --> 00:12:32,209
I could really use some
assistance. [chuckling]
434
00:12:32,210 --> 00:12:33,210
Ow!
435
00:12:33,211 --> 00:12:35,379
Fuck off, Billy.
Your agent's on the phone.
436
00:12:35,380 --> 00:12:36,630
[Billy].
Oh shit!
437
00:12:36,631 --> 00:12:38,007
It must be the
'roids commercial.
438
00:12:38,008 --> 00:12:41,427
Oh my god, I have been
with some fucking losers.
439
00:12:41,428 --> 00:12:43,470
Girl, you gotta type.
440
00:12:43,471 --> 00:12:45,097
Except for Chelsea.
441
00:12:45,098 --> 00:12:46,683
[indistinct chattering]
442
00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:49,144
[Homer sighing]
443
00:12:49,978 --> 00:12:51,311
Is this your wedding cake?
444
00:12:51,312 --> 00:12:53,063
Yeah, my third one.
445
00:12:53,064 --> 00:12:54,773
Got some from the second
one in here somewhere.
446
00:12:54,774 --> 00:12:56,108
[Dewey].
My lasagna!
447
00:12:56,109 --> 00:12:57,568
That's my Tupperware.
448
00:12:57,569 --> 00:12:59,278
What?
- My name's on it.
449
00:12:59,279 --> 00:13:00,237
No, it's not.
450
00:13:00,238 --> 00:13:01,572
Dewey, snap to it.
451
00:13:01,573 --> 00:13:03,574
Come on! We gotta move
The Beast across the floor,
452
00:13:03,575 --> 00:13:05,242
around the corner and
up those back stairs.
453
00:13:05,243 --> 00:13:06,285
Oh.
- Yes.
454
00:13:06,286 --> 00:13:07,828
Those look far away.
- [Homer] Oh, Christ!
455
00:13:07,829 --> 00:13:09,163
Are you serious?
456
00:13:09,164 --> 00:13:10,205
They're just right there.
457
00:13:10,206 --> 00:13:11,665
Grab a corner and
I'll navigate.
458
00:13:11,666 --> 00:13:12,583
[Todd] Seriously?
- Whoa, whoa, whoa!
459
00:13:12,584 --> 00:13:13,834
Why the fuck do
you get to navigate?
460
00:13:13,835 --> 00:13:14,835
That's the easiest part.
461
00:13:14,836 --> 00:13:16,253
Four guys, four corners.
462
00:13:16,254 --> 00:13:17,212
[Homer] Bullshit!
- Okay.
463
00:13:17,213 --> 00:13:18,756
Look, none of you
assholes helped
464
00:13:18,757 --> 00:13:19,757
when I had to move,
all right?
465
00:13:19,758 --> 00:13:22,509
I had to drag a futon up
three flights of stairs.
466
00:13:22,510 --> 00:13:24,845
Taser said he wasn't
built for staircases.
467
00:13:24,846 --> 00:13:25,846
[Dewey].
Oh!
468
00:13:25,847 --> 00:13:27,598
What the fuck are you
actually built for?
469
00:13:27,599 --> 00:13:29,266
Alimony, apparently. Come on.
470
00:13:29,267 --> 00:13:30,851
[Todd].
Oh for fuck sakes!
471
00:13:30,852 --> 00:13:31,769
[Taser].
Come on. It's not that bad.
472
00:13:31,770 --> 00:13:33,270
All right, I'll take
that far corner.
473
00:13:33,271 --> 00:13:34,688
It's not as heavy. My back's-
474
00:13:34,689 --> 00:13:36,023
No, no, no, I want that corner.
475
00:13:36,024 --> 00:13:37,191
Look...
- [Homer] Back off.
476
00:13:37,192 --> 00:13:38,651
I'm gonna count us in.
477
00:13:38,652 --> 00:13:42,029
One, two, three. Lift!
478
00:13:42,030 --> 00:13:43,530
[everyone grunting]
479
00:13:43,531 --> 00:13:44,531
Dewey!
- [Homer] Fuck!
480
00:13:44,532 --> 00:13:45,824
You gotta lift
when you say lift.
481
00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:46,867
Okay, all right.
482
00:13:46,868 --> 00:13:47,868
Fuck's sake!
483
00:13:47,869 --> 00:13:49,036
Come on!
484
00:13:49,037 --> 00:13:50,037
Heave!
485
00:13:50,038 --> 00:13:51,455
[everyone grunting]
486
00:13:51,456 --> 00:13:53,040
Fuck a duck walk!
487
00:13:53,041 --> 00:13:54,041
Oh, duck walk!
488
00:13:54,042 --> 00:13:55,167
What is a duck walk?
489
00:13:55,168 --> 00:13:56,293
[Homer].
Shut the fuck up about the duck walk!
490
00:13:56,294 --> 00:13:57,294
Left to right!
491
00:13:57,295 --> 00:13:58,629
That isn't gonna work, Dewey!
492
00:13:58,630 --> 00:14:00,798
[everyone mumbling]
493
00:14:00,799 --> 00:14:02,049
[Todd].
No, no, no, it's stuck.
494
00:14:02,050 --> 00:14:03,217
[Dewey].
Put it down!
495
00:14:03,218 --> 00:14:04,426
[everyone yelling indistinctly]
496
00:14:04,427 --> 00:14:05,511
[fridge screeching
and thudding]
497
00:14:05,512 --> 00:14:06,720
Ahhhhh!
498
00:14:06,721 --> 00:14:07,721
[Todd].
Are you okay?
499
00:14:07,722 --> 00:14:08,889
[screaming] Oh fuck!
500
00:14:08,890 --> 00:14:10,015
[Medhi].
He'll be all right.
501
00:14:10,016 --> 00:14:11,183
It's okay. I'll get it
- [Dewey] You'll be fine.
502
00:14:11,184 --> 00:14:12,184
He's all right.
He's all right.
503
00:14:12,185 --> 00:14:13,268
Let's keep going. This side.
- Fucker!
504
00:14:13,269 --> 00:14:15,604
[Taser] Careful!
- Ahhhh! My hand!
505
00:14:15,605 --> 00:14:17,231
Ah! Motherfucker!
506
00:14:17,232 --> 00:14:19,483
[Dewey] Ah! My-
- This Beast is cursed!
507
00:14:19,484 --> 00:14:21,068
It should be left to die
like the animal that it is.
508
00:14:21,069 --> 00:14:22,277
No!
509
00:14:22,278 --> 00:14:24,905
We're taking this piece of
shit to the dump right now!
510
00:14:24,906 --> 00:14:26,657
All right. Regroup.
511
00:14:26,658 --> 00:14:29,076
Come on, guys.
- Ah! Ah!
512
00:14:29,077 --> 00:14:30,077
One!
513
00:14:30,078 --> 00:14:31,078
[Homer groaning]
514
00:14:31,079 --> 00:14:32,079
[Dewey].
Two!
515
00:14:32,080 --> 00:14:33,122
Three!
- Dewey!
516
00:14:33,123 --> 00:14:34,081
And-
- If you say "lift"
517
00:14:34,082 --> 00:14:35,249
and don't lift one more time,
518
00:14:35,250 --> 00:14:36,667
I swear I'm gonna
fold you in half
519
00:14:36,668 --> 00:14:38,127
and stuff you in
this fucking fridge!
520
00:14:38,128 --> 00:14:39,420
Okay, I will lift.
521
00:14:39,421 --> 00:14:40,879
And lift!
522
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:41,880
[Todd].
Holy fuck this heavy!
523
00:14:41,881 --> 00:14:43,549
[Medhi].
Ow! My hand!
524
00:14:43,550 --> 00:14:45,426
I'm pinned! I'm pinned!
525
00:14:45,427 --> 00:14:46,927
[everyone groaning]
526
00:14:46,928 --> 00:14:48,679
[everyone talking indistinctly]
527
00:14:48,680 --> 00:14:49,763
[Medhi].
Watch out, watch out, watch out!
528
00:14:49,764 --> 00:14:50,848
[refrigerator thudding]
[liquid gushing]
529
00:14:50,849 --> 00:14:52,933
Ahhhhhhh!
530
00:14:52,934 --> 00:14:55,644
This thing got me
in the eyeball!
531
00:14:55,645 --> 00:14:56,854
It's a spitting cobra!
532
00:14:56,855 --> 00:14:58,939
And there goes the freon line.
533
00:14:58,940 --> 00:14:59,940
Hey, great work, Dewey!
534
00:14:59,941 --> 00:15:01,525
Hey, take a breather!
535
00:15:01,526 --> 00:15:02,526
You'll be fine. There you go.
536
00:15:02,527 --> 00:15:03,944
Okay. Enough!
537
00:15:03,945 --> 00:15:05,904
Why are we even trying to
move this piece of shit?
538
00:15:05,905 --> 00:15:07,865
Piece of shit?!
539
00:15:07,866 --> 00:15:09,950
This is all I got
left from my dad.
540
00:15:09,951 --> 00:15:10,951
What?
541
00:15:10,952 --> 00:15:12,119
[Taser].
Yeah, that's right.
542
00:15:12,120 --> 00:15:14,246
Before he got sick,
my dad loved pickling.
543
00:15:14,247 --> 00:15:15,247
[Homer].
Pickling?
544
00:15:15,248 --> 00:15:17,958
He stored it all
here in The Beast.
545
00:15:17,959 --> 00:15:20,461
It kept him busy during
some trying times.
546
00:15:20,462 --> 00:15:21,837
[gentle music]
547
00:15:21,838 --> 00:15:23,630
He loved it.
He pickled everything:
548
00:15:23,631 --> 00:15:25,966
Eggs, peppers, pig's feet.
549
00:15:25,967 --> 00:15:27,134
[Homer].
Okay, you lost me at pig's feet.
550
00:15:27,135 --> 00:15:28,552
Sauerbraten?
- Sauerbraten.
551
00:15:28,553 --> 00:15:29,553
[gentle music]
552
00:15:29,554 --> 00:15:31,388
It's good.
- [Homer] Yeah.
553
00:15:31,389 --> 00:15:33,974
[Taser].
And after he passed, everything else got sold.
554
00:15:33,975 --> 00:15:35,559
His clothes.
- [Medhi] Terrible!
555
00:15:35,560 --> 00:15:38,145
Stereo, his prosthetic leg.
556
00:15:38,146 --> 00:15:40,731
[Homer] Oh, Jesus!
- Except for this beauty.
557
00:15:40,732 --> 00:15:42,775
She stayed.
- What the fuck?
558
00:15:42,776 --> 00:15:44,485
[Taser] But yeah.
- Ooh hoo! Ooh.
559
00:15:44,486 --> 00:15:45,486
[woman cheering]
560
00:15:45,487 --> 00:15:46,737
[Backwoods].
Ooh.
561
00:15:46,738 --> 00:15:48,322
[muffled chattering]
562
00:15:48,323 --> 00:15:50,532
[Backwoods].
Oh no! Billy you weasel.
563
00:15:50,533 --> 00:15:52,409
Audrey, why are you
letting this happen?
564
00:15:52,410 --> 00:15:53,952
Please.
565
00:15:53,953 --> 00:15:55,996
[Taser].
It brought people together with his pickles.
566
00:15:55,997 --> 00:15:57,623
I'm sorry, man.
- Yeah.
567
00:15:57,624 --> 00:15:58,999
Thanks guys.
568
00:15:59,000 --> 00:16:00,417
[gentle music]
569
00:16:00,418 --> 00:16:01,502
This is fucked!
570
00:16:01,503 --> 00:16:03,420
Oh, thanks for breaking
the mood, Backwoods.
571
00:16:03,421 --> 00:16:05,422
Look who finally decided to
show up to the moving part.
572
00:16:05,423 --> 00:16:07,216
You guys said you wanted
some fucking help?
573
00:16:07,217 --> 00:16:08,384
Have at it.
574
00:16:08,385 --> 00:16:10,677
Let's fucking get it!
575
00:16:10,678 --> 00:16:11,678
[Homer].
Good luck!
576
00:16:11,679 --> 00:16:12,596
[fridge thudding]
[Backwoods grunting]
577
00:16:12,597 --> 00:16:14,390
All right, uh,
thanks for helping.
578
00:16:14,391 --> 00:16:15,432
We're gonna take a break.
579
00:16:15,433 --> 00:16:16,392
Good luck!
580
00:16:16,393 --> 00:16:17,601
We got some ribs and
beers upstairs, boys.
581
00:16:17,602 --> 00:16:18,602
Oh my god!
582
00:16:18,603 --> 00:16:21,188
[Backwoods grunting]
583
00:16:21,189 --> 00:16:22,940
At least I left this shithole
584
00:16:22,941 --> 00:16:25,984
and made something outta
my life in the big show.
585
00:16:25,985 --> 00:16:27,653
Hmm.
586
00:16:27,654 --> 00:16:29,405
Is that you?
587
00:16:29,406 --> 00:16:31,448
Absolutely, birthday girl!
588
00:16:31,449 --> 00:16:33,993
What's with all
the fucking dicks?
589
00:16:33,994 --> 00:16:35,536
God. Look, I got one here.
590
00:16:35,537 --> 00:16:37,871
Let me sign it for ya for
your birthday, special from me.
591
00:16:37,872 --> 00:16:39,039
You know...
592
00:16:39,040 --> 00:16:40,541
So, uh, what's your deal?
593
00:16:40,542 --> 00:16:44,044
Like, uh, accounting?
Office clerk? Uh...
594
00:16:44,045 --> 00:16:45,505
Nope.
- Oh!
595
00:16:45,839 --> 00:16:47,047
Big boss lady.
596
00:16:47,048 --> 00:16:49,466
No. I work for her.
597
00:16:49,467 --> 00:16:50,426
[Janet].
Yeah! Yeah!
598
00:16:50,427 --> 00:16:51,885
[Chelsea].
Like, look at that.
599
00:16:51,886 --> 00:16:53,053
Oh my god!
600
00:16:53,054 --> 00:16:54,221
You work for that trainwreck?
601
00:16:54,222 --> 00:16:55,639
Send it.
602
00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:58,142
Yep, it'll be on my tombstone.
603
00:16:58,143 --> 00:17:00,602
Babysat a nepo baby
all day at work
604
00:17:00,603 --> 00:17:02,021
and made her a ton of money.
605
00:17:02,022 --> 00:17:03,690
And died lonely.
606
00:17:05,483 --> 00:17:06,567
[woman cheering]
607
00:17:06,568 --> 00:17:09,903
I'm gonna go get
aggressively fucked up now.
608
00:17:09,904 --> 00:17:11,780
This is forty?
This is forty?
609
00:17:11,781 --> 00:17:12,781
Oh! No.
610
00:17:12,782 --> 00:17:15,701
Oh, you have to take
one of these. Please.
611
00:17:15,702 --> 00:17:18,245
[upbeat music]
612
00:17:18,246 --> 00:17:20,831
FUCK!
613
00:17:20,832 --> 00:17:22,417
Sorry.
614
00:17:22,418 --> 00:17:24,293
[phone dinging]
615
00:17:24,294 --> 00:17:26,295
[Chelsea sighing]
616
00:17:26,296 --> 00:17:28,131
Video message? Really?
617
00:17:28,132 --> 00:17:29,506
[Donnie].
Hey Chelsea.
618
00:17:29,507 --> 00:17:31,383
It's Donnie again,
from CornPulse.
619
00:17:31,384 --> 00:17:33,093
You didn't return any
of my other calls
620
00:17:33,094 --> 00:17:34,470
so I'll get right to it.
621
00:17:34,471 --> 00:17:37,097
Our VP of Operations
just stepped down.
622
00:17:37,098 --> 00:17:38,474
You free for a chat?
623
00:17:38,475 --> 00:17:41,685
[soft dramatic music]
624
00:17:41,686 --> 00:17:46,649
[upbeat music]
625
00:17:46,650 --> 00:17:47,691
[Taser].
Ah, shit!
626
00:17:47,692 --> 00:17:49,026
[Todd].
Fuck, that thing's stuck!
627
00:17:49,027 --> 00:17:50,235
[Homer].
That's not going anywhere.
628
00:17:50,236 --> 00:17:52,238
I guess I can't use
my back door anymore.
629
00:17:54,949 --> 00:17:56,825
Dewey, what the fuck?
630
00:17:56,826 --> 00:17:59,495
Uh, mild freon exposure.
631
00:17:59,496 --> 00:18:00,788
Probably under 400 OEL.
632
00:18:00,789 --> 00:18:01,830
He'll be fine.
633
00:18:01,831 --> 00:18:03,957
You know, Taser,
I'm so sorry.
634
00:18:03,958 --> 00:18:08,087
I didn't know your father
passed. It's, uh...
635
00:18:08,088 --> 00:18:09,630
But, you know, the way
you spoke about him,
636
00:18:09,631 --> 00:18:10,964
it was so, so vivid.
637
00:18:10,965 --> 00:18:12,966
It was like he
was still alive.
638
00:18:12,967 --> 00:18:14,510
He is.
639
00:18:14,511 --> 00:18:15,761
I lied.
640
00:18:15,762 --> 00:18:16,804
What?!
641
00:18:16,805 --> 00:18:18,138
I made up all the stuff
about the fridge
642
00:18:18,139 --> 00:18:19,681
and all the stuff
about my dad.
643
00:18:19,682 --> 00:18:21,141
I wanted the fridge to
seem more meaningful
644
00:18:21,142 --> 00:18:22,059
so you guys would help.
645
00:18:22,060 --> 00:18:24,144
[Medhi].
Even the Sauerbraten part?
646
00:18:24,145 --> 00:18:25,145
Yeah.
647
00:18:25,146 --> 00:18:27,106
Dick moves, man.
You conned us!
648
00:18:27,107 --> 00:18:28,148
[Backwoods groaning]
[fridge clattering]
649
00:18:28,149 --> 00:18:29,358
Ahhhhhh!
650
00:18:29,359 --> 00:18:31,485
She's coming back for more!
651
00:18:31,486 --> 00:18:33,529
Ahhhhhh!
652
00:18:33,530 --> 00:18:34,488
[refrigerator thudding]
653
00:18:34,489 --> 00:18:36,031
Ahhhh!
654
00:18:36,032 --> 00:18:37,908
[Backwoods grunting]
[refrigerator thudding]
655
00:18:37,909 --> 00:18:40,577
[grunts] The Beast is toast.
656
00:18:40,578 --> 00:18:42,371
[dramatic music]
657
00:18:42,372 --> 00:18:44,708
Sorry, Tase.
I really needed that.
658
00:18:44,709 --> 00:18:46,417
Glad I could help.
659
00:18:46,418 --> 00:18:47,751
[Todd] You did shit.
- [Homer] Useless.
660
00:18:47,752 --> 00:18:51,130
Taser, your dad would've
been proud of you.
661
00:18:51,131 --> 00:18:52,297
I just know it.
662
00:18:52,298 --> 00:18:55,676
Were you not here for 'his
dad's alive' part or what?
663
00:18:55,677 --> 00:18:56,677
Maybe.
664
00:18:56,678 --> 00:18:57,886
[upbeat music]
[Taser chuckling]
665
00:18:57,887 --> 00:18:59,805
Well, time to move that
L-shaped couch, boys.
666
00:18:59,806 --> 00:19:00,764
Come on!
667
00:19:00,765 --> 00:19:01,807
No way!
- Fuck yourself!
668
00:19:01,808 --> 00:19:03,017
Fuck that!
- FUCK OFF!
669
00:19:03,018 --> 00:19:04,519
I'm shot!
670
00:19:07,105 --> 00:19:09,356
Oh. Fuck my life!
671
00:19:09,357 --> 00:19:11,400
? Take the world
in a love embrace ?
672
00:19:11,401 --> 00:19:13,193
[Audrey].
What is happening now?
673
00:19:13,194 --> 00:19:17,197
? Fire all of your guns at once
and explode into space ?
674
00:19:17,198 --> 00:19:19,199
[Audrey].
Ew, he's spitting on her.
675
00:19:19,200 --> 00:19:20,617
Okay, bye.
676
00:19:20,618 --> 00:19:22,369
[Audrey].
Oh my god, you need to wash that mane.
677
00:19:22,370 --> 00:19:25,497
? Heavy metal thunder!
678
00:19:25,498 --> 00:19:26,623
? Racing with the wind down ?
679
00:19:26,624 --> 00:19:28,792
[Steph].
Okay, get back a little bit.
680
00:19:28,793 --> 00:19:30,794
? And the feeling
that I'm under ?
681
00:19:30,795 --> 00:19:31,962
[crowd cheering]
682
00:19:31,963 --> 00:19:33,839
? Hey! Yeah, darlin',
gonna make it happen. ?
683
00:19:33,840 --> 00:19:36,050
Fucking yes! Chelsea!
684
00:19:36,051 --> 00:19:38,510
? Take the world in
a love embrace ?
685
00:19:38,511 --> 00:19:39,803
I fucking love this song!
686
00:19:39,804 --> 00:19:43,140
? Fire all of your guns at
once and explode into space ?
687
00:19:43,141 --> 00:19:45,517
[chants] Chelsea!
Chelsea! Chelsea!
688
00:19:45,518 --> 00:19:48,604
? Like a true nature's child ?
689
00:19:48,605 --> 00:19:58,615
[everyone snoring]
690
00:20:02,661 --> 00:20:05,204
[phone ringing]
691
00:20:05,205 --> 00:20:10,918
[everyone snoring]
[phone ringing]
692
00:20:10,919 --> 00:20:14,254
[upbeat music]
693
00:20:14,255 --> 00:20:16,215
? I'm going out tonight
694
00:20:16,216 --> 00:20:18,092
? I'm feeling all right
695
00:20:18,093 --> 00:20:22,262
? I'm gonna let
it all hang out ?
696
00:20:22,263 --> 00:20:24,848
Okay, so let me
get this straight.
697
00:20:24,849 --> 00:20:26,558
You were in the game?
You did erotic dance?
698
00:20:26,559 --> 00:20:28,977
Yeah. I did. For a bit.
699
00:20:28,978 --> 00:20:30,437
I did the swinging cage.
700
00:20:30,438 --> 00:20:31,480
Wow!
701
00:20:31,481 --> 00:20:32,439
And advanced pole. Yeah.
702
00:20:32,440 --> 00:20:33,691
Those are my two specialties.
703
00:20:33,692 --> 00:20:34,733
You did the pole.
704
00:20:34,734 --> 00:20:36,068
No, man. I'm self-taught.
705
00:20:36,069 --> 00:20:37,611
That's, that's impressive.
706
00:20:37,612 --> 00:20:41,031
Oh. Yeah. I ran
as Pheromone Rush.
707
00:20:41,032 --> 00:20:42,491
You know, that's ringing a bell.
708
00:20:42,492 --> 00:20:43,450
Yeah, I'm not surprised.
- Wow.
709
00:20:43,451 --> 00:20:45,119
You know, back then I was cut,
710
00:20:45,120 --> 00:20:46,537
I was ripped.
711
00:20:46,538 --> 00:20:48,288
I had a nice kind
of physique going
712
00:20:48,289 --> 00:20:49,456
but now you know what I...
713
00:20:49,457 --> 00:20:51,542
Come on!
I can see it.
714
00:20:51,543 --> 00:20:54,628
[both chuckling]
715
00:20:54,629 --> 00:20:56,547
Well, hate to leave ya
for the ladies, bud.
716
00:20:56,548 --> 00:20:58,132
But yep, good.
- [Fernie] Yeah.
717
00:20:58,133 --> 00:20:59,299
? Oh-oh-oh, get in the action ?
718
00:20:59,300 --> 00:21:01,135
Yeah, you guys coming.
719
00:21:01,136 --> 00:21:03,053
I fucking love this song!
720
00:21:03,054 --> 00:21:04,680
? Colour my hair,
do what I dare
721
00:21:04,681 --> 00:21:06,890
? Oh-oh-oh, I wanna
be free, yeah
722
00:21:06,891 --> 00:21:08,225
Billy!
[Billy laughing]
723
00:21:08,226 --> 00:21:10,728
? To feel the way I feel ?
724
00:21:10,729 --> 00:21:11,812
Oh!
725
00:21:11,813 --> 00:21:13,480
? Man, I feel like a woman ?
726
00:21:13,481 --> 00:21:15,316
[Billy grunting]
727
00:21:15,317 --> 00:21:16,943
[Janet].
Come on, Barb!
728
00:21:16,944 --> 00:21:19,153
[Jenn].
Come on, Barb. Shred it!
729
00:21:19,154 --> 00:21:20,154
Woo!
730
00:21:20,155 --> 00:21:21,322
[Steph].
Come on, Barb!
731
00:21:21,323 --> 00:21:23,282
[electric guitar solo]
[crowd cheering]
732
00:21:23,283 --> 00:21:25,325
[Billy grunting]
733
00:21:25,326 --> 00:21:27,161
Who wants tequila?
You want some?
734
00:21:27,162 --> 00:21:29,246
[Jenn].
Chelsea, get over here!
735
00:21:29,247 --> 00:21:31,206
[Billy].
Let's go, Chelsea!
736
00:21:31,207 --> 00:21:34,918
? The best thing
about being a woman ?
737
00:21:34,919 --> 00:21:35,919
[Steph].
What?
738
00:21:35,920 --> 00:21:38,255
? Is the prerogative
to have a little fun
739
00:21:38,256 --> 00:21:39,757
? Fun! Fun! ?
740
00:21:39,758 --> 00:21:40,883
Have fun!
741
00:21:40,884 --> 00:21:43,886
? Oh-oh-oh, go totally crazy
742
00:21:43,887 --> 00:21:45,846
? Forget I'm a lady
743
00:21:45,847 --> 00:21:47,723
? Men's shirts, short skirts
744
00:21:47,724 --> 00:21:49,099
[Steph].
Come on, ladies!
745
00:21:49,100 --> 00:21:51,352
? Oh-oh-oh,
really go wild, yeah
746
00:21:51,353 --> 00:21:53,937
? Doin' it in style
747
00:21:53,938 --> 00:21:57,274
? Oh-oh-oh,
get in the action
748
00:21:57,275 --> 00:21:59,193
? Feel the attraction
749
00:21:59,194 --> 00:22:01,029
? Colour my hair,
do what I dare ?
750
00:22:06,534 --> 00:22:08,578
? To feel the way I feel ?
751
00:22:14,123 --> 00:22:17,378
[Bev].
More beers for the ladies.
752
00:22:17,379 --> 00:22:18,379
[Barb].
We're thirsty!
753
00:22:18,380 --> 00:22:19,881
[Chelsea].
Tequila!
754
00:22:20,382 --> 00:22:21,965
[Steph].
Come on, girls!
755
00:22:21,966 --> 00:22:23,510
[Bev].
Oh yeah.
756
00:22:24,719 --> 00:22:26,346
Come on, baby!
757
00:22:26,763 --> 00:22:28,555
[Chelsea].
Holy shit, we're good!
758
00:22:28,556 --> 00:22:30,486
[intense music]
[people screaming]
759
00:22:31,726 --> 00:22:34,521
[intense music]
760
00:22:34,571 --> 00:22:39,121
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