All language subtitles for Billy.Crystal-700.Sundays.2014.720p.HDTV.x264-BATV-eng

I love introducing myself.

In childhood, I did everything
to laugh at me.

Anything.

I entertained my uncles
charismatic ...

and my fashion aunts.

But above all,
my parents.

My mom and dad.
I loved making them laugh.

It was great to see them happy.

that's how
a comedian starts.

He makes his parents laugh.

That was a long time ago.
And it all started here.

My parents bought
this house in 1953.

And the day came when
she is no longer ours.

The year 2001 was well
difficult for me.

I lost a lot of people
dear ...

and still had the attack
September 11th.

It was a hard blow ...

like Joe Frazier
cornered me ...

and I couldn't breathe.

My shows were
speeches in wake ...

of people I loved.

When someone funny
you don't feel that way anymore ...

it complicates things.

1960.

Joel, six feet.

Rip, 1.75m.

And down here ...

I couldn't
out of the pit.

So I went into the living room.

Here I took
the first laughs ...

and I thought "If I could
hear the laughter again. "

That's what Yogi Berra, my
favorite philosopher said ...

"When faced with a
indecisiveness in life, decide. "

Advertise your product or brand here
talk to www.SubtitleDB.org today

We bought a
new car! Incredible.

I was the youngest boy
happy in the world ...

because we bought our
first new car.

And I didn't know what it was.
Dad said ...

"Billy, I bought a car.
surprise. Don't tell anyone.

Bring everyone
out of the house ...

I will arrive with him,
exactly at noon. "

So, before noon,
we were all right here ...

imagining
what he had bought.

Joel started. He was older,
with 15 years and very practical.

"A Ford Fairlane."

Rip was 11 years old
and it was already cool.

"Got crazy?
Bellaire convertible ...

turquoise and white.
Bellaire convertible. "

Mom was visionary.
"Couldn't he wait?

They will launch the new Edsel.
It is the car of the future. "

And I interrupted. Always me.

Cages and shorties
always interrupt.

I was 9 years old. "Wait!
He said it was a surprise.

What if it's a Cadillac? "

So my father arrived
in a brand new car ...

from the dealership.
A gray Plymouth Belvedere.

What idea was that?
It wasn't the dream car.

But mom calmed us down
and said "Honey ...

It's a beautiful long car
and with start button. "

And he replaced the one
car I knew.

And I was happy to see him
going away...

because it was embarrassing
go out with him in the city.

It was 1957. There were many
cool cars.

But Crystals still
they had a black Chevrolet ...

and 1948 square.
Look at this thing.

It is not a family car.
It's an escape car!

Sonny was shot on the bridge ...

in this car.

Why do we use this
car so many years?

Two reasons.
We can't buy another one.

And because my father loved him.

He took care of the car
with all affection...

and kept it running every day.
And gave it a name. Nellie.

Men always
give woman names ...

and talk to the cars,
as if they were women ...

especially in the morning.
"Come on, dear. Turn around."

At the end of life, Nellie
began to suffer ...

after-ignition syndrome.

It was very sad.
You turned off the ignition ...

and Nellie coughed and spit
few minutes later.

She looked like an old woman
cursing in an argument.

"It's not me. It's you.
It's not me. � you.

It's not me. � you.
It's not me.

� you. � you.

� you. � you.
� you. � you.

� you. � you. Get screwed. "

So we had a new car
and we went for a walk and celebrated.

And where do the Jews celebrate?
In the Chinese restaurant.

Our favorite place
it was Wing Lu.

Excited dad
loosened up a little ...

after a few drinks.
Gibson vodka.

Mr. Lu passed and he
shouted "What's up, Lu?"

My father laughed
and Mr. Lu mumbled ...

"What an idiot."

And the gray Belvedere outside,
shining in the streetlight ...

as a good Belvedere
gray can do.

And we were happy, we had
our first new car.

We have never been so happy.
That is...

it was the perfect time to
something goes very wrong.

Big John Amento was
a city mobster ...

a scary gangster.
It was our Lou Gabrozzi.

And we don't know that Big John
was going to come into our life ...

because he drove
his car, drunk ...

a Lincoln Continental
1957, anti-Semitic.

He came flying
on Park Avenue ...

lost control and hit
at the rear of the Belvedere ...

that hit the car
from the front ...

transforming our car
in a Plymouth "Belv."

The other day, we had
a twisted metal ...

at the door of the house,
at 549 East Park Avenue ...

in Long Beach, Long Island, NY.
My home town.

At the time, a
quiet beach town ...

10,000 people in winter
and almost 4 or 5 million in the summer.

All clogging the beach
and the street ...

with an amusement park
miniature.

This was the roller coaster
scary 1 meter.

But it was the perfect place
to grow...

with President Eisenhower
and his wife Mamie ...

that was too old
to use bangs.

It looks like the fringe
jumped out of his head ...

for her head.

The only woman who
had hair like that ...

was the mayor's wife
from Munchkin City.

Long Beach was the city
healthiest in the USA ...

but not that morning.
We sat in the living room ...

mourning the new car.
"I answer."

I always answered,
thinking that one day ...

someone would come to
take me to Hollywood.

I opened the door and what did I see?

An overcoat, a neck
and an eyebrow.

It was Big John Amento.

"Can I see the father, please?"

"The father? Sorry.
We are not Catholic.

Dad! Big John Amento.
He's going to kill us!

We are fried! "
"Billy, stop the drama.

He won't do anything.
He just wants to talk.

It's all right. Let him in. "
"Me? I'm 9 years old!

I have a whole life
ahead! "

Later,
my performance has improved.

"Please, Dad. Don't you know me?
I'm the boy. I'm Porgy.

And Porgy has no legs.

And it's too far
for those who have no legs. "

Bess, you are mine
woman now

"You are crazy. Get up
and let him in. "

"Am I crazy? Come on
sleep with the fish ...

and am I crazy?

I found it. In between."
He followed me into the living room.

We're still
working on it.

"How are you, Mr. Crystal
and Mrs. Crystal?

How are you, boys?
I'm John Amento.

But what happened yesterday
It was an accident.

I didn't mean it.
If it was my intention ...

it would be a posthumous visit,
understood?

So I talked about it
with my partners ...

and we decided to do something
special for you. "

"Special?
This will not be accurate.

We will trigger the insurance. "

"We are the insurance company!
Now that.

I asked about you.
You are dear and respected.

Everyone likes their family.

Here's what we'll do.
I'll buy a new car.

The car you want.
You can choose. "

That was too much!

The car we wanted.
We can choose!

"Dad, listen to my brain.
Corvette! Corvette! "

"Let's fix the car."
"Damn it!"

"A little question, Mr. K."

Some delayed
to understand.

It's not such a good joke.
There are other better ones.

But I'm just testing.

� the first round,
just a few punches ...

and frankly, you
they need to train more.

But back to the piece!

"Did you decline my offer?
It's not a good idea.

It bothers me
and confuses me ...

and that's why I stay
upset and confused.

Why do you
don't you want a new car? "

"Because, Mr. Amento,
I bought this car. "

The thing got tense.

Joe looked at Rip,
Rip looked at me ...

I looked at mom,
she looked at dad ...

and she smiled in a way
that I will never forget.

She came to Dad,
so embraced him ...

and they smiled together
for Big John Amento.

These are my parents.

Two weeks later,
the car came back.

Big John understood it,
the car was fine.

We open the luggage rack to see
if there was no corpse.

We sit down
in the usual places.

Me in front, my parents
and my brothers back.

They put me
in front to provoke.

"You don't need
of legroom. "

Not yet accurate.

I would sit in the middle,
between my parents ...

my mother used to pass her arm
left behind me ...

and supported him on the shoulder
husband's right ...

while he was driving.
Just to touch it, you know?

I was in the middle
and looked at my father ...

my first hero,
while he was driving.

It looked like he drove
a Rolls Royce or a Bentley.

I never thought it was
a gray Plymouth Belvedere.

That was my father.
He worked hard for us.

I had two jobs,
Sometimes three ...

including friday
and Saturday night.

The only day he stayed
it was Sunday.

On Sundays, my brothers
and I did a show ...

for him to laugh. �amos
to the Long Beach boardwalk ...

enjoy toys,
hitting baseballs ...

play golf, watch a movie ...

or even
a Broadway show.

And Sundays started
early for me, at 4am ...

when daddy arrived
of work on Saturday.

He arrived with the car ...

my room was
near the garage ...

and I felt the car
arriving at the entrance.

He would turn off the engine
and stopped in neutral ...

so as not to wake us up.
I knew he was here.

So, I couldn't
sleep more.

And when the sun rose ...

I was on tiptoe
to their room ...

that was next to mine.

And I pushed the door
to open it a little ...

and spy on my parents
lying together ...

at peace and quiet.

And I would sit there,
waiting for you to wake up.

I couldn't wait
on Sundays.

And he died out of nowhere,
when I was 15 years old.

So I calculated something
around 700 Sundays.

That's it. 700 Sundays.

There is not much time for
a son stay with the father.

First Sunday. I was born!

Sunday,
March 14, 1948.

If you do the math,
I am 47 years old.

7:30 am. They said my
delivery was difficult.

"Push, dear.
The baby is leaving! "

"I'm pushing."
"How it feels?"

"As if a train leaves
of my ass! "

"He's coming back!"

Get out! I was born!

Someone hits my butt.
Nice reception!

They cut the cord
and put me on an icy scale.

"It passed a little bit,
Do you still want it?

Take the password."

Second Sunday.
My circumcision.

That was slutty.

It's a bad way
to start life.

I had 3.8 kg and was
naked on a pillow ...

like a cooked chicken.
I'm taken from the family ...

by a bearded
and bad breath.

"How are you?"
He puts me on the table ...

take a razor and cut
a piece of my penis ...

15 or 20 centimeters.

"Wow, how hard.

Mary, bring the electric knife.

Get away. When I
shout "wood" ...

it will fall.

Ready! See the size.
It's a blanket.

Bull! Bull!

Murray, see.
I'm the Super-Jew!

Jack, cover the car.
I think it's going to rain."

And I cry out in pain.
"My penis! My penis!"

And uncle Herman
shout "Let's eat!"

Because we learn soon
that in �diche ...

bris
Is a prefix
of "cookie".

On Sunday 3 Jack and Ellen
take me home ...

and introduce me
to crazy people, manaceans ...

and without notion: my family.

A very eclectic group
of Germans, Russians ...

and Austrians who came
to the USA with the same goal ...

live the American dream.
And they only spoke diche ...

a mix of German
with mucus.

It is not a language,
It's an infection, you know?

� guilty pleurisy.

They stayed in the room,
coughing out the words.

Coughing like that.

So they used
plastic film at all.

I wore raincoat
up to 27 years.

Precise, a
guttural language ...

and these people eat and speak
at the same time.

If someone eats yogurt
in front of you...

run away.

"The furrier is an idiot.
The furrier is an idiot.

He's an idiot.
It's the furrier. Idiot.

It's a stupid furrier.

Retail!"

"Brooklyn Dodgers?
Screw them! "

You end up wearing
what they ate.

And if it's a blue suit,
you’ll become a Jackson Pollack.

We all have relatives
favorites, right?

That happens.
And with me too.

I had my favorites,
like my aunt Sheila.

A beautiful woman, isn't it?

She was my hero.
He spoke the truth.

Aunt Sheila was frank.
Some said that she talked too much.

But that's why I liked her.

She and my uncle Leonard
lived in Boca Raton.

What a shock!

She smoked all day
and spoke like this ...

"Leonard, get the car.
Leonard, get the car.

My new hip is going to rust.
Take the damn car.

Leonard, it's almost 1:30.
I don't want to be late for dinner.

Take the damn car! "

�-: Her eldest daughter
it was my cousin Julie.

We were very close
and Julie is a lesbian.

And years ago,
when the gay union ...

was legalized in S�o Francisco
Julie got married. It was fantastic.

Everyone was happy.
And Sheila went there ...

just for the wedding.
And it was great ...

but her generation
you don't understand this well ...

and was proven by
her call to her friend Reba ...

to talk about the wedding.

"Hello, Reba.
Julie got married yesterday.

With her mate.

That's what they call it.
"Companions".

No. Tonto was s�
a faithful friend.

They threw a party.
And you know, at the end of the party ...

No, dear.

They don't step on the glass
and shout
L'chaim
.

It was not a Jewish festival.
It was "lesbiteriana".

Leonard, get the car! "

And then, my uncle Jack.
I adore him.

One side of the face was paralyzed.
So he was like that.

Every morning he came
to the coffee and said ...

"Who will eat
waffle with me?

Let's eat waffle.
Who wants?

Let's eat waffle.
I need a waffle.

Who wants a waffle?
No one?

Why nobody wants
eat waffle? "

"Why don't you see yours as
mouth stays when you eat! "

I adore him. The worst for him
� that for a joking boy ...

his face was
quite a present.

So I called him
of Uncle Picasso.

But he called me
in a corner ...

and told dirty jokes.
Very dirty.

And I never could
run away from him ...

because that face
it was scary.

It was the Jewish Ghost
of the family opera.

Slow down, dear

And he pushed me
against the fridge ...

and told a joke.

"Billy!

I have a great one for you.

A couple for the car
near the cemetery.

They kiss,
get excited ...

and decide to make a
schtup
.

Schtup
. Make love.

Get laid, got it?

But the car is small.

They enter the cemetery,
take off your clothes ...

he puts it in a tomb,
stay there all night ...

and she hurts her back.
The next day she goes to the doctor.

He examines it and says
"Honey, how old are you?"

She says "I am 22 years old."

"Strange. Your ass says
that you died in 1931.

Understood? Her back
were marked.

Tell your friends
of the school. "

In this Long Beach house ...

I grew up with a family
who lived with us.

It was another family,
besides the one I talked about.

But this family
it never got hot.

They stayed on theirs.
They didn't speak diche ...

but a language that they
invented themselves.

It was the language of
jive
,
the cool ones.

They also smoked
but they were unbranded cigarettes.

Because they were musicians.

The most jazzy
cool and cool of the time.

The house smelled
of bread and whiskey.

They were Jews and jazz
forever in the house.

My bar mitzvah turned
an improvised show.

And why was it weird?
The jazz musicians said ...

"Give me $ 5." And my people
"You owe me $ 5!"

The family business
it was jazz.

My father was a manager
from a record store ...

in NY, at 42nd Street,
in front of the Chrysler.

It was the Commodore
Music Shop.

Originally, Commodore
it was a hardware store ...

of my grandfather, Julius Gabler ...

that sold items
for home and radio.

Your eldest son Milt,
who didn't just become my uncle ...

but my mentor in life
and in my career ...

worked at the store,
after high school.

One day, he arrives at the store,
turn on one of the radios ...

who played Bix Beiderbecke,
from Dixieland ...

and falls in love with music.

So much so that he lied
to his father ...

and said he was going to study
At night with friends.

But Milt is hidden,
I would take the train to the Village ...

just to go to clubs
of jazz that was out there.

So he was going to 52nd St.,
the swing street ...

to the clubs
and listen to good music.

And he was going to Harlem
to meet the musicians ...

who came from New Orleans,
Kansas City and Chicago.

And after years of that,
in love with music ...

and after meeting
so many musicians ...

he goes to the store and tells his father
"Dad!" "Milt, don't scare me like that.

I thought it was a Cossack. Already
tell the neighbors' hideout.

What's it?"
"Dad, I had an idea.

I want to produce jazz records.
We can sell them here at the store. "

"Milt, I hate jazz.
Why do you want to do that? "

"We are going to make a lot of money."
"I'm in!"

And in January 1938,
Milt calls his friend ...

a guitarist from chicago
called Eddie Conden.

And the band was
The Windy City Seven.

They go to a stadium
close by ...

and Milt does something that
never did in life.

It produces 2 discs.

And the music
Love is Just
Around the Corner
.

And so the record company is born
of jazz Commodore ...

the first record company
independent jazz in the world.

And the records became
a success.

So much so that in a short time,
Milt produces 95 albums ...

and today, many have become
collector's items.

And the artists line up
for record...

with the brilliant producer
record label.

And their big star
it was Billie Holiday.

Billie recorded her best
discs at Commodore.

Music like
Embraceable You
,
Fond and Mellow
...

My Man
and
Lover Man
.

But his single more
important...

not the greatest success,
but the most important...

was
Strange Fruit
.
You should know.

Otherwise, at that time,
this song was considered ...

one of the first songs
US protest.

She had a strong handwriting about
the lynching of blacks in the south.

"The southern trees
they give strange fruits.

Blood on leaves
and roots.

Black bodies hanging down
South breeze.

Strange fruits
hanging in the fields. "

Nobody wanted to record it.
No one would touch it.

Frustrated, Billie searches
your producer friend ...

my uncle Milt.
And according to legend ...

she went to Commodore,
after hours ...

sat with Milt
and sang the chapel ...

with that painful voice
and painful handwriting.

He said "Billie, this is
important and must be heard! "

And here they are, 75 years ago,
when recording
Strange Fruit
.

Billie Holiday, the legendary
black jazz artist ...

and my white, chubby
and Jewish uncle Milt ...

together, recording
Strange Fruit
,
a song that in 1999 ...

Time Magazine would call
of "song of the century".

The original recording
is at the Smithsonian.

But with pride
that I say ...

that she is ours
record label, Commodore.

And with the success of the records
it's from
Strange Fruit
...

that small store
2.7m wide ...

becomes the center of jazz
in New York.

And the big labels
start calling Milt.

In 1941, he leaves the store ...

and the record company command
to my father...

his brother-in-law. Milt will
for Decca Records ...

where from 1941 to 1973 ...

he builds
an excellent career.

The high school dreamer goes
for the Grammy Hall of Fame ...

with 35 gold records and Rock
and Roll Hall of Fame ...

because the pioneer
jazz records record ...

Rock Around the Clock
,
Bill Haley and the Comets.

Incredible career. Milton was
the celebrity of the family ...

but the store was the place
daddy's favorite.

Joel, Rip and I loved each other
work with him.

Never forget me.
I was 5 years old.

A special gift.
I went to work with Dad.

He straightened me up and put a
pink carnation on my lapel.

We continue towards Nelly
and we went to New York.

We arrived on the expressway,
I saw the buildings from afar ...

and I thought "I'm going to
the Emerald City. "

And we never know
who would be in the store.

We entered and Louis
Armstrong was there ...

Count Basie and Duke Ellington.

Rosemary Clooney
I always went to the store and said ...

"My nephew is the child
sexiest in the world. "

That day, I entered
With my dad...

with jazz playing,
and he puts me in a booth.

Where people listened and decided
which disc it would take.

I was on a stool
and listened to all kinds of music.

I looked through the glass and saw
daddy serve customers.

He looked very
important for everyone.

So it was already 12:45.

He taps on the glass and says
"Time for lunch."

And it was the 1st time I had lunch
alone with my father.

So we left the store
and turn right at 42nd Street ...

that is, to the west.

And so we went through
Commodore Hotel ...

which the store got its name from.

So we went together
� Grand Central Station.

We followed the crowd,
we passed the oyster bar ...

we go up the ramp
and we entered the lobby ...

with all those people
waiting for whatever.

And I think "It's my birthday.

Because I am
at a train station? "

So he says "Billy,
see the ceiling.

I always have lunch here
and wanted to show you.

Isn't it too much?
Happy birthday, son. "

It is magnificent. � a map
of the constellations ...

stars, galaxies
and the universe ...

that didn't seem to end anymore.

It was the best birthday
that I already had ...

sitting on a bench
With my dad...

eating one
Edith's hot dog ...

under a beautiful sky
of fake stars.

This anniversary
it was a Friday.

When the store closed,
I won a gift.

Dad took me
to another job of his.

Since the late 1940s ...

my father produced shows
Jazz on the Lower East Side ...

on 2nd Avenue
with 6th Street.

It was a salon where
weddings and bar mitzvahs.

The name was Central Plaza.

He started renting it
On Fridays and Saturdays ...

to do something that was
legendary on the jazz scene ...

and what he called just
from "The Sessions".

Everyone played there.
And with the rise of rock ...

the Central Plaza
became the only place ...

where the stars of Dixieland
they played that genre.

And the university students went
to dance ...

because before rock and swing,
this was the fashion.

The shows started at 19h
and ended at 3am ...

usually with the big
Chicago trumpeter ...

Jimmy McPartman ...

who played
When the
Saints Go Marching In
.

My father was very happy there.
Why not?

Because he didn't sell
only the discs.

He was working
with the artists and said ...

that jazz was the only art
genuinely American.

People called,
wanting to play there ...

and my father mixed them
as a scientist ...

always behind the sound
and the perfect mix.

Years ago, the NY Times
did a retrospective ...

from my father's work
at the Central Plaza.

And they quoted him as
"the Rickey Branch of jazz."

As I read, I was proud.
They wanted to say ...

that my father was a
of the first producers ...

to integrate the bands,
with whites and blacks.

This was not common ...

even in New York,
in the 40s and 50s ...

when jazz and Central
Plaza were at the apex.

And the musicians adored him
because of this.

And he too. There ...

they were the others
his children.

If my dad won $ 1,
he gave them 75 cents.

So we had
a gray Belvedere.

But that night I met
my father's secret life.

He said to me "Stay there.
I need to do something.

Can you take care of him?
I'll be right back. "

He should present the show
and I didn't know he did that.

I was only 5 years old,
and suddenly, he's on stage ...

with a microphone,
saluting the public.

He was smart and charming
and had the audience in the palm of the hand.

I was little,
but I already felt ...

the importance of it being
the subject...

that presented that
music for the world ...

and also being,
for musicians ...

the guy who did that.

I presented the Grammy three
times before the other show.

And at all times,
I channeled it ...

because i did like him
it was decades ago ...

but presenting the great
musicians of my time.

And that night,
on my birthday ...

for the 1st time, I did
a show for a public.

I was backstage
with fantastic musicians ...

which my father used to say
who had "great souls".

And great nicknames too.
Willie "The Lion" Smith ...

Wild Bill Davison,
Cutty Cutshall ...

Big Chief Russell Moore
and Wingy Manone.

This is Roy Eldridge,
a fantastic trumpeter ...

but he was not tall.

So, his nickname
it was Little Jazz.

Upon meeting me ...

he called me
by Nanico Jazz.

The others called me
of face. It was my nickname.

Drummer Zutty Singleton
gave me the nickname.

He called me that because
I made their faces.

I imitated them.
Look at these faces.

What boy would not imitate?

And I started that night,
in the band room.

Someone put a box
saxophone on the floor ...

and that was a stage.

"Zutty, come see what
Face knows how to do!

Face, tell the joke
that I talked about Zutty.

"The couple was standing still
near the cemetery. "

"I like that joke ...

but tell me what I said
about Zutty. "

"Zutty will cut his hair
and ask the barber ...

the cut price.
He says 2 dollars.

What about shaving?
To scratch, $ 1.

Very well then,
can scrape. "

"Did you hear, Zutty?
He caught you, tough guy!

Face, that was too much.

Do you understand?
I know I would understand. "

So, they go on stage,
start playing ...

and I was in Heaven.
I was 5 years old ...

but I understood my father
and my uncle on the spot.

I fell in love
by Dixieland's jazz.

For me, it's music
world's happiest ...

but be 3m from the biggest
musicians of the world ...

playing like that ...

and I couldn't help it.

I went up on stage, I was in the middle of them
and I started tap dancing like crazy.

They acted like I
was part of the show.

My mother tapped very well
and tried to teach me ...

but I was just tap dancing
with the right leg.

The left did not move.

My father took the camera
and filmed everything.

I continued.

I did everything I could,
but I ran out of steps.

I only had one.
So it was pretty quick.

I remembered what Mom said.
"If it gets difficult, finish it."

So, walk away
like that, like crazy ...

I made a star,
I got on my knees ...

and spread my arms.
The staff went crazy ...

and since then, I do
presentations in public.

I will say. Run away
from the stage to my father ...

And he says
"Billy, that was awesome!

When listening to the music, you
can't stand still. "

Once, my father
was producing ...

a Billie Holiday show,
on the Lower East Side ...

and I was very blessed
for meeting her at the time ...

because of her relationship
with my uncle and my father.

Billie Holiday called me
of "Mr. Billy".

And I called her
of "Mrs. Billie".

When she finished
to rehearse with the band ...

she had 3 free hours
before the show starts.

So she looked at me
and said something ...

that changed my life.

"Mr. Billy, come.
Let's go to the movies."

So, Billie Holiday
and I went down 2nd Ave ...

and after Central Plaza,
right next to ...

there was a movie called
Loew's Commodore.

In the 60s, he was
famous as the Fillmore East.

And sitting on your lap
Billie Holiday ...

I saw my first film.
The Brutes Also Love
.

With Alan Ladd, Van Heflin
and Jean Arthur.

And Jack Palance!

And the boy,
Brandon De Wilde ...

that I thought looked like me
proved that even softly ...

I could be quite tall. At the end
from the movie, Shane runs off ...

and he, crying like me,
run behind and scream ...

Shane!

Come back!

And Billie whispered
in my ear...

"He won't be coming back."

But you know what?

It was a Sunday.

Thanks.

I'm a lucky boy.

Once, my grandmother
told Louis Armstrong ...

at a Seder dinner ...

"Louis, have you tried
cough to get it out? "

She was great.
My grandmother, Susie Gabler.

And she was big.
Very big.

She already came to fruition
3 electoral votes.

She was big.
But very funny.

Almost a comedian
and very insightful.

She solved everything
very skillfully.

Once ... Can I count?

I arrived suddenly
and she was naked.

Believe. I know.

She did better than me.

"I bet you found it
who would never see this! "

I was 35 ...

and never seen
nothing like that.

Her husband was
my grandfather Julius.

Julius was not so
fun like her.

This is him, laughing.

But he was cool ...

despite a small
hearing problem.

We try to get
a hearing aid ...

with one of your contacts
from the Commodore Music Shop.

Every week, he tested
a new device.

I always did that to him.

"So, grandma ...
I hope this is ...

or the other ... but you know ...

they don't know ...
or can we ...

Testing. One, four.
Testing. Four.

You know ... a song ... "

"Damn it, Billy. Another crap!"

His visits were great.

The house was small
and the walls were very thin.

He woke up at 7am
and we would wake up with him.

He was a Jewish rooster
non-practitioner at 7am.

"Socialism."

The problem was that he
I didn't hear anything.

And for a little boy ...

this sound is the most
funny of all.

He would shake and I would laugh a lot.
And he continued to speak.

"Billy, I think ...

I need...

I need to buy bread ...

and get the clothes.

What a burning smell.
What is that?

Why are you
so far? Come here.

I need to go back at 5pm ...

because your grandmother will
cabbage soup.

What came into you
and died? Is everything okay? "

I loved drinking coffee�
in the morning with my grandfather.

Every day at 8am,
we had coffee together.

And that's when I started
to learn about life ...

because of the beautiful
his Austrian optimism.

For him, the glass was
always half full ...

of some poison.

I stayed in the kitchen,
waiting for him to come down.

Every day, he went down
wearing the same outfit.

Tank top, shorts ...

and some testicle
coming out from the side.

Just a little bit,
showing up there ...

hanging done
a lava lamp.

Just a little.

Enough
to terrify me!

"What is that?
I don't have that!

Damn it. Am I going to have that?

I don't want to!

What is that? Joe the Grandpa
have an octopus in shorts! "

And sometimes gravity
it got a little worse.

Sometimes, from behind he looked like a
Great Dane leaving.

"Crap. Damn it."

You saw my grandfather.

"Good morning, Bill. Good morning.

What's the deal?
Why are you laughing?

What's the deal? Say it.

It's 8am. Nothing has
thanks to that hour.

What's it?

You are a very happy boy.

That worries me.

Billy, I've been thinking.

You are already 8 years old.
What are you going to do with your life?

You should already know.
At 9 years old ...

I didn't live yet
In the USA.

I lived in Austria,
in the village of ...

Burg.

And my parents wanted
a better future for me ...

and they put me on a ship,
the SS Rotterdam.

And I crossed the Atlantic
alone, at 9 years old.

I arrived at Ellis Island
on August 3, 1904.

The next day,
I already had a job.

I had a cart
to push ...

and I pushed it.
Therefore, that name.

Pushing the cart.
Pushing the cart.

And after one month
pushing that ...

I thought "Idiot.
Put something in it. "

I pushed a cart
empty and won nothing!

A plan was missing.
You must plan your life.

So, with 2 cents
I bought a cloth ...

but I tore it in half,
I sold them both for $ 0.05 ...

and I made a profit. So, I got it
how it worked.

I tore a cloth,
sold for more ...

and kept the money.
Rip, sell and save.

Rip, sell and save.
And over time ...

I managed to buy
my first store ...

to sell dresses
on Fulton Street.

It was my biggest
pride in life.

But the store was too small,
I needed the store next door.

A�, I started to work harder
and I didn't waste my money.

I ate wood
and drank sand.

And over time,
I bought the store next door ...

I dropped everything,
I expanded my store.

Then I bought
four more stores ...

I dropped everything and expanded
until occupying the block.

They were the first
Brooklyn apartments.

And when I saved
a lot of money...

I carried out my plan.
I crossed the Atlantic again ...

and brought my family
to live in the USA.

And I completed 10 years.
But you ... "

And I believed him.

How not to believe?
It is a beautiful story.

About a boy
who won in life.

My grandfather turned
my great hero.

But at 8 ...

� when we started
collecting heroes.

May 30, 1956.

My father takes us to our
1st game at Yankee Stadium.

We drive by the elevated
from Jerome Avenue in the Bronx ...

and the sun tried to appear
behind the rails.

We stopped in the parking lot
and I was looking for the field.

"Dad, where's the field?"
He said "It's over there."

"In that building?"

"Come on, guys."
And we ran.

On the way, it was
increasingly cool.

"Software!
Tickets, please.

Well, no. Have fun, boy. "
I was in the crowd.

Shirt Men
and tie ...

towards "ceremonial"
of the 2 games.

I was 8 years old,
It was THIS big...

and held the hand
from my father...

as he crossed
so dark tunnels ...

that I saw nothing,
but I could hear ...

the sound of something great
about to happen.

I smelled
hot dog ...

beer and mustard
mixed with concrete.

Suddenly,
we were inside.

Dad filmed everything with his camera
to never leave memory.

But how was it possible?
The green of the lawn ...

that beautiful field ...

the bases shining in the sun
like giant marshmallows.

The Washington Senators
warming up on one side ...

and the Yankees on the other.
Very beautiful.

Our TV was
in black and white.

That was my first
color game.

We stayed in the chair
Louis Armstrong.

I sat down on my knees,
I couldn't see.

There was a huge priest at the front.
in a black suit and white collar.

But in the 4th inning, Mickey Mantle,
25 years, a uniformed Elvis ...

hitting left ...

makes the home run longer
of the history of the stadium ...

that hits the facade
of the copper roof ...

180m away.

And while the ball
crossed the sky ...

the priest gets up and won't let me
see my first home run.

And I only hear you
"Jesus Christ!"

In the 7� inning, Mickey
hits a triple ...

runs to the 3rd base,
like a fugitive ...

and I shouted "Mickey! Mickey!"
And he looked at me.

There he is, number 7,
under that sun.

And soon I decided. I wanted
so much be Mickey Mantle ...

that I just walked
like him, limping.

I spoke at my bar mitzvah
Oklahoma fashion.

And my brothers and I
we played baseball ...

I would like to be
Yankees player.

And on Sundays, my father
took me to a field ...

to teach me how to hit
a curved ball.

My father was a launcher
in college ...

and launched a great
curved ball.

And the whole summer
I couldn't get it right.

"Hey, Billy.
Do not rotate the body too much.

You have no strength,
so don't try to pull the ball.

In this game, you
need to stay at the base.

So wait and hit back
to the right.

Wait and hit back
to the right."

Summer gave way to October,
the leaves changed color ...

it was the mood of the World Series
and I still didn't get it right.

"Wait". And it was already November.

"Wait". It was December
and we were still there.

It's hard to get it right
a curved ball ...

but hit the snow?

"Billy, you can do it.

Your brothers are
freezing. Let's go."

"Wait."

"Now, yes. Again."

"Wait."

Thanks. My father did
all these films ...

and I'm glad I
I can use them ...

otherwise, I would only
half the show.

He was ours
documentary filmmaker.

He took the camera
everywhere ...

and it's great to have these films.
My children saw it, their grandchildren will see ...

and know who came
before all of us.

And he had a relationship
different with each one ...

with that 8mm camera.

My favorite is the relationship
him with my uncle Danny.

Danny at the barbecue ...

The best movie of the year,
in all years.

My father filmed my uncle
on the barbecue ...

on Sunday
of July 4, 1957.

It's a silent film
3 minutes ...

and without me saying anything,
it will tell everything ...

about my family.
Want to see?

You have no choice.
I will show.

Let's turn off the light
and show this film ...

the 1957 barbecue,
right now. Thanks.

At 3 pm on Sunday, my father
I took the mandolin and played it.

He sat
in the corner of the sofa ...

near the window.

The sun passed
shutters ...

making it look like it touched
a mandolin on a chain.

We always expected it
touch...

even losing
one hour on Sunday ...

because he was
so happy playing ...

that everyone left him
alone, except me.

I came down the hall
and before reaching the room ...

there was a column where
I could hide.

I would take a look ...

just to see my father
playing the mandolin ...

At 3pm on Sunday.
I don't think he ever saw me.

But I always thought he
knew I was there.

My father was very quiet.

He had a great sense
humorous, insightful and dry.

He knew what was funny.
His smile was gentle and sweet.

Everyone loved him.

But just as he was
kind to people ...

Sometimes at home,
his mood changed.

He was witty.

But my mother had
the smile of Times Square.

It was the family light.
He sang and danced ...

and could be a great actress.

They met
at Macy's in the 1930s ...

when they worked there.
Dad, in the Dept. Legal ...

and she at Armarinho.
She had a balcony ...

where he sold thoughts,
concepts and ideas.

They were a beautiful couple.

Mom was emotional,
romantic dad.

Every Sunday morning,
on the kitchen table ...

there was a vase with s�
a red rose ...

and a card that said
"Forever yours. Jack."

They always embraced
and kissed on the cheek ...

and we never stayed
embarrassed ...

neither do they.

It's nice to know that they
they were always in love.

And when he finished playing,
it ended with a flourish ...

put the mandolin
in a beautiful box ...

and took a book
by Will Durant ...

The Life of Greece
.

My father was fascinated
by the Greeks ...

and found the biggest
civilization of all.

All about the Greeks
interested him.

He loved to read
about democracy ...

the mythology, the pieces,
the tragedies, the comedy ...

the squirrel books,
Eur�pides and Arist�fanes ...

and knew a lot
the islands well.

It was like he had
lived in Mykonos ...

or Crete, or Santorini.

And when we could do
our first trip ...

with the family together,
there was only one destiny ...

Catskills.

Inside the Belvedere
we went north ...

towards the mountains
of Catskills ...

land of Rip Van Winkle,
of the Knight Without Head ...

and Jews who had no
money to go to Hawaii�.

Where the miserable people
from the city arrived in 2 hours ...

to be miserable in the countryside.

If Osama Bin Laden
if you hid there ...

someone would tell him
"So, are you single?"

The hotel was Kutcher's. There was a
lake and a huge pool.

It was a lot of space for me
turn on your side and pee.

The restaurant was intense.

There were a thousand Jews eating
like vikings.

And each dish came
with a complaint.

"I didn't ask for this.
I ordered chops. "

That trip would change
my life.

That's when I learned
hating the countryside.

I saw my parents dancing
mambo together.

And we saw Bellboy # 1
from Kutcher's, Wilt Chamberlain ...

in a uniform
Harlem Globetrotters.

But on Saturday nights
the comedian was the king.

I had never seen
a comedy show.

And along with my parents,
we entered the Kutcher's nightclub ...

and that's when I saw my
first comedian.

"Good night,
ladies and Jews.

I got home and my
woman was in bed ...

with my best friend. I said
"Lenny, I'm obliged, are you?"

A guy goes to the doctor
and says he has 5 penis.

-And how does your pants fit you?
Like a glove. "

I saw a boy in the pool
touching the testicles.

He says "Mom, is it my brain?"
She says "Not yet."

He dominated the stage as
panther dressed as a shark.

He was amazing
and ended up with the public.

They shrunk 15cm
when the show was over.

I was only 9 years old,
I had a crack and said ...

"Look at him. Look.

I would never play like Mickey
Mantle, but this ...

I can do it!"

I decorated his show
at the same time.

On the weekend,
the relatives would visit us ...

and there were 40 or 50
people in the room ...

and for me, that was
"Show time!"

My first stand-up but I
I had nothing prepared.

So I used the same
show I saw at Kutcher's ...

and changed some things
to suit my audience.

"Good night, Jewish family.

Grandma had a rough night.
He came home ...

and found grandma in bed
with Uncle Mack.

So he said
"Mack, I am obliged.

What's new? "

Uncle Barney said that
bought a new pair of pants.

"And how did they look?"

"I can't get dressed.
I have five penis! "

It is difficult.

The doctor said
to Uncle Picasso ...

"Jack, I want a sample
of urine, blood and feces. "

He said "Okay.
I will leave my underwear here. "

You were a great family.
Good evening everyone. My God!

I ran to the room.
I didn't understand what happened.

Laughter entered my blood
and fate had caught me.

I was only 9 years old
and I already knew what I wanted to be.

I would be a comedian.
There was no way.

I was very happy! More ...

I heard my parents
in their room ...

right next to mine.
The walls were thin.

"Jack, talk to him. Five penis?
Did he say that?

I don't know if Barney
have a penis ...

and now, he has five?
What was this?"

"He decorated the show
and modified it. It was smart. "

"Intelligent?
My mother is crying.

Make love to Uncle Mack?
He's her brother-in-law. "

"It was a joke.
I thought it was funny. "

"Urine, blood and feces
Is it funny for you?

I made a lot of food
and nobody wanted to eat.

Talk to Billy today. "
"I will speak."

"Talk to him today."

"I will talk to him,
but not today.

Did you see how happy he was?

I promise I will speak
with him tomorrow. "

I heard everything
and I was devastated.

But I learned a lesson.

Thicker walls!
Who needs to hear this?

The next day,
my father came to talk.

"Billy? Billy.
You were very funny!

But you know, you must
meet your audience. "

"Dad, I want to be a comedian.
Is it crazy that I want this?

I loved it. Are you crazy? "

"No. You can
be a comedian.

And I will help you because
I believe in you. "

The next day, he
started helping me.

He brought something from the store
who found it perfect ...

for a little boy
I wanted to thank you.

"It's a tape recorder."

It was a recorder
with a microphone.

Now the room was
overturned my room.

I could give
a show in the room ...

but with the recorder,
I could hear you.

I would train my
imitations ...

like that of Edward G. Robinson
in
The ten Commandments
.

"Where is yours
Messiah now? "

The recorder was used to
I train my
timing
.

And my father would show me
the TV comedians ...

to inspire me. I could even
sleep late in the week ...

to see the best,
like Ernie Kovacs.

Or Steve Allen with Tom Post,
Don Knotts and Louis Nye.

Or the best of all,
Sid Caesar ...

with Carl Reiner, Imogene
Coca and Howard Morris.

And every Sunday night Ed Sullivan
received a comedian, right?

And it was always Alan King.

It was Phil Silvers
like Sergeant Bilko ...

and
The Honeymooners
,
with Gleason and Carney.

So my father brought
home...

someone more funny
than the TV giants ...

your little brother.

It was the first time that
I saw my crazy uncle Bern.

He was crazy.
1.90m and 108kg of fun.

An uncle to play with.
He looked like Hemingway ...

but it had the personality
from Zero Mostel.

One day, my father brought
a comedy disc ...

of Spike Jones and his band
called The City Slickers.

I played for Uncle Bern
and said "Fun, isn't it?"

"Billy, it's perfect. Duble
and show it to the family. "

And I dubbed it.

Thanks.

So this is what I
I did from 9 to 14 years old.

I noticed that I just wanted
be two things ...

a comedian
or a Yankees player.

Or a Yankees player
very funny.

But I discovered something that made me
forget about the Yankees ...

and everything I liked.

That's when I found out
my penis.

You too?

Not mine.
Only I discovered mine.

I would remember.

And I discovered it a lot.
6, 7, 8, 10 times a day.

What's the record?
Does anyone know?

And it is not a good addiction.

The penis is a weapon
self-destruct.

Of course. That little boy,
great, i would say ...

caused many problems
throughout history.

Think. Thomas Jefferson
had several cases.

With your friend
Strom Thurmond ...

it was the same thing.

Why great men?
The power goes straight down there.

There were several. Kennedy,
Clinton and Eisenhower ...

had cases.
Even FDR had cases.

I can't understand.
Serious.

If you can have sex
with Eleanor Roosevelt ...

every night...

"Where are you going?"

He pretended he was just paralyzed
so I don't have to have sex with her.

What's it? Too early?

And now I had
this problem in the hands.

When puberty
hit me ...

I got possessed.
The hormones screamed.

I was always ready.
"Now now."

And I felt horny about everything.
"A bagel." "Now."

Once.

But only once.

It had poppy seed
and almost tore me up.

"How stupid."

But we do stupid things
at 15 years old.

We are very strange
at 15 years old.

We are not pretty.

We have the mustache
like a mustache.

It looks like an anchovy
over the lip.

And we have Ed Wynn's voice.

"How are you?

How are you?

How are you?
I'm a ghost ...

with a monster
living in the pants. "

"Now now."

That's when I saw the girl.

"Now."

It wasn't hard. "Lie."

It was something else. It was love.

"Well, you are
talking to me."

Stop this.

It was the most beautiful thing
that I had already seen.

Blonde with freckles.
AND
cheerleader
.

"Let me go there." Shut up.

And I asked her out.
I went to her and said ...

"How are you?

I'm Billy Crystal
and I don't know you.

I saw her and if you are
free on Friday ... "

"Walk long."
"I'm trying.

If you are free on Friday
Do you want to go out with me?"

"Now yes."

My first
encounter in life.

I was going home
at the age of 15 ...

and I was so crazy that
I remembered the address.

I walked around the neighborhood,
lost...

"Enter to the left."
"Thank you. I ..."

It is the first GPS.

"You arrived
to your destination. "

"Leave me alone." "Never."

"You are mine."

I went to the door
and I was terrified.

"Let me ring the bell.

Forget it. I'm going to hit. "

If they didn't
cut the 20cm ...

I would have brought down the house.

We started to leave
and it was the 1st time of all.

Kiss one
girl at the cinema ...

in the box
Laurel Theater.

What is most romantic
what is that?

"Now." After,
in a friend's car ...

at a Freeport drive-in,
Long Island.

"Now." She was perfect.
"Now."

So, I told her
"You know, I love you.

I love you very much.
Let's date seriously. "

"Billy, I like it a lot
of you as a friend. "

"Really? I thought ..."
"Billy, I like you.

But not that way. "

"What about me?"

"I understand well...

what can I say?
See you at school?

It's all right. See you. "

I was rejected
for the first time.

I said I loved her
and that he liked her.

What did I get in return?
"I don't feel the same way about you."

It hurt even in the soul.

I crawled around the house
all week.

I just thought
on that girl.

Tuesday night,
October 15, 1963.

I was in the kitchen,
studying for a test ...

it was the next morning
and I didn't give a damn.

Why? Why should I
call Chemistry?

I had lost the girl.

And who cares about Chemistry?
Why do we study this?

Is there a chemist here?

See? They never show up!

Because I
studying Chemistry?

That would matter
in my life?

Would I talk about this with anyone?

Or someone would ask
"Billy, what's the lead?"

So I was
studying Chemistry ...

and each page turned,
I saw the girl's face.

My parents came
say goodnight.

They went to the bowling tournament
of having at the Long Beach Bowl.

They had a lot of fun
in this tournament ...

but honestly, it was
their only fun ...

because things had
changed for the worse.

Commodore Music
Shop had closed.

She couldn't compete
with discount stores ...

that invaded New York.

That Sam Goody's
opened on 42nd Street.

Our store was
straight ahead ...

and she swallowed us,
like a whale.

In an instant, they were gone
decades of music ...

and musicians, laughter and legends.
Gone. In the name of progress.

And the music I loved,
Coleman Hawkins ...

Ben Webster and Sydney
Bechet was replaced ...

by Duprees, Earls,
Shirelles and Beach Boys.

And these giants
original jazz ...

men and women
who gave birth ...

� music we have
until today ...

started playing
in parks ...

wearing alloy on the sleeve
and straw hats.

My father was 54 years old
and I was scared.

Joel and Rip went to
college at the same time.

For the first time,
my father was out of a job.

He still did the shows
Friday and Saturday ...

but it gave a large part
from money to musicians ...

for them to survive. I don't know
how we managed at the time.

I don't know how we did it.
So, one night ...

the bell rang
and I went to answer ...

because I always answered.

He was a nervous guy,
asking for dad.

They went to where
the garage was.

I didn't like that.
There was something wrong.

So, I went after
and I saw from a distance ...

my father selling his
personal collection ...

of jazz classics.

All 95 albums
intact originals ...

for 500 dollars.

Mom said it was the only one
time you saw daddy cry.

And upon returning to the kitchen ...

he was worried,
upset...

and when you saw me
traveling on the girl ...

he got mad.

"Billy, try to pass
in the race tomorrow.

In all of them!
Improve your grades.

I don't have money
to pay for your studies!

You know what?
I'm unemployed!

If you were
to college today ...

I couldn't afford it.
It embarrasses me.

I used life insurance to pay
Joel and Rip's college.

How will I pay
when is your turn?

Help me, boy.
Get a scholarship.

If it's baseball,
it's great. Help now.

But it's better than you
get a scholarship ...

for being studious.

Have you read about the Greeks?
Never!

And I will tell you.
Stop weeping.

I can't take it anymore.

� because of that
stupid girl, right? "

"Shut up! You don't know
you are welcome. Shut up! "

"Never
talk to me like that.

Please."

And they left. My God.
I didn't believe it.

It escaped my mouth.

I never spoke
so with him.

I ran to apologize
but the car had already left.

I stood in the driveway
under that October moon.

And I said "Easy.
They will arrive at 11:30 pm ...

and you can apologize.

And he can help me
to study for the exam. "

And all that was
because of the girl.

I went back to the kitchen, looked at
the chemistry book ... and I closed it.

"Screw it.
What if I don't pass? "

I went to my room
and before I go to bed ...

I closed the door,
but not entirely.

I didn't like being in the dark
and left a little space.

The corridor light
lit up my room ...

and I slept.

And I just remember
the door opening ...

because the whole house
I shook and I woke up.

I looked at the clock
and it was 11:30 pm.

"They arrived."
So, I heard my mother ...

passing down the hall
where the rooms were ...

laughing as always.
And it got louder and louder ...

and higher and higher,
until the door opens ...

and I realize that she
I wasn't laughing.

She was crying, copiously.
And it reached me in a second.

"Billy, honey. Daddy died.

Dad died. "
Uncle Danny was with her.

"Dad died.
He didn't stand a chance.

He died. He died."

"As well?"

I woke up to her saying
that daddy had died ...

and I asked:
"Mom, did Grandpa die?"

She put her hand
on my face and said ...

"No, dear.

Bill ...

your father had a heart attack
on the bowling alley ...

and did not survive.

They tried to save him,
but they didn't succeed.

He didn't come back with me.

He died, Bill.
Your father died. "

She sat close
from me, I hugged her ...

and said "Mother, always
I'll take care of you. Ever."

And she gave a
sigh so deep ...

supported the head
on my shoulder and said ...

"I need to tell
to your brothers.

Help me count
that daddy died.

Help me count.
Dress up, dear.

Your uncles will come.
The night will be long.

We have many things
to decide.

I don't believe
that it happened. "

And she touched her
face in mine.

I felt the hot tears
her on my cold face.

So she got up
and kissed me right here.

Then she left
and left me alone ...

with this news,
for the first time.

I looked in the mirror ...

and I never saw a child again.

It was like someone
give me a rock ...

a huge rock ...

for me to carry
for the rest of your life.

I got dressed, I went to
dinner room...

my uncles had already arrived.
Milt, Barney and Danny ...

holding hands with me
and mom tried to understand ...

what had happened
one hour before.

And the confusion increased ...

with the red light
of the police car ...

that stopped right in front.

The red light
I danced around the room ...

and soon there was
a police officer at home.

Never had a policeman
entered there. It was scary.

A huge guy
with a huge gun.

He took off his cap
and apologized ...

for the nag.
He came to us.

I remember the steps
on the wooden floor.

When approaching,
it got bigger ...

even stop
right on top of me.

So he gave it to me
a manila envelope.

"What is this?"
"Your father's belongings.

Mrs. Crystal, if you need to
of something, call us.

Gentlemen, what can I say?
Better days will come.

Take care, boy. "

I opened it and there were only ...

a baseball cap ...

the alliance ...

the watch ...

and his wallet.

The life of a man
in a manila envelope.

I had never held
his wallet.

I don't think I ever touched her.
In childhood, the father never ...

give us money. � always
the mother. They do everything.

"Mother, money
for the cinema. "

"The scholarship is here.
Take what you want. "

A father never says "Here is the wallet.
Take what you want. "

And I opened it for the first time.

There was only the wallet
driver ...

and pictures of us.

Cele Weinstein
lived right next door.

There was a hedge
between the two houses ...

1.5m high
1.5m wide, like Cele.

She was a woman
lovely ...

had a high-pitched voice ...

and an equal laugh
to a rain of lightning.

We never see Cele.
She spoke through the hedge.

And that night,
she was scared.

"Helen, why are the police
Are you here? Everything okay?

There is something wrong. I know."

"Cele, it sucks!
Jack died today.

Yes, Cele. He had
a heart attack and died!

My Jack died! "

"No, Helen!

Who will take Billy
to baseball games? "

The next day,
something strange happened.

The car wouldn't start.

The gray Belvedere
I didn't want to start.

He drove the car
160km a day ...

every day by everyone
the years he had it.

He kept it
in perfect condition ...

and he never failed.
Until that day.

The car knew he had died
and I didn't want to leave without him.

He stood at the door, with a hood
open ... challenging.

And Stan, the attendant,
he was a cheerful guy.

They were good friends
and took care of the Belvedere ...

since the day my
father bought the car ...

except that day.
Stan was crying.

He tried to charge
on the battery.

But it didn't work.

He tried several times
and the car wouldn't start.

I saw everything well from here
and didn't believe it.

Stan towed it
the Belvedere ...

and the front of the car
it looked sad.

Joel and Rip arrived.

Now there were four of us.

And they said that
at night, we'll see the body.

Because the Jews soon bury.
We'll take care of that.

A narcoleptic uncle
I fell asleep ...

and we already made the grave.

I wish I could cut
People of my life...

that are not part of
of history.

I wanted to cut them,
like in a movie.

And I wanted to cut
the owner of the funeral ...

which was, ironically,
near Yankee Stadium.

My life was ruined.

Why I needed
talk to him?

"My condolences
To the family of the deceased.

In a few minutes,
you will be able to see him ...

in a special room ...

reserved only
for family members.

For a while,
my condolences ...

in this sad moment
and sorry for their lives. "

What a scene! My father dies
and I need to speak to Frajola!

He approaches and stops
a mourning brooch ...

we need
use for 30 days.

So he cuts it off
and sing the
Kaddish
...

a Jewish prayer
for the dead ...

that for him,
it was a total disaster.

"I think I saw a kitten.
Amman! "

The jokes filled
my brain.

I looked at Joel, he had
understood and said "Don't even think."

Many great musicians
attended ...

everyone to say
goodbye to a great friend.

And we got in our hands
given in the chapel.

And our family
and the jazz people ...

as a family
and bowed their heads.

Nobody said anything.

I didn't understand anything.
So, I turned around ...

and there were Count Basie
and Duke Ellington.

�-: They came.
They bowed their heads ...

everyone came
with the royalty of jazz ...

and Count and Duke asked
for them to do that.

Nobody said anything.

We passed them,
in the private room ...

and there he was.

And she didn't look like him.
And he was so quiet.

Hours before, we fought
because of the girl.

And I just thought that
it was my fault ...

that I caused that
and I was answered.

"It was my fault.
It was my fault."

But he didn't answer
because it was quiet.

I didn't hold on
and I got angry.

I just thought "A father
I shouldn't die like that!

A father shouldn't die
on a bowling alley ...

surrounded by strangers
wearing rented shoes! "

And I hated myself
for feeling that.

Aunt Sheila was
behind me.

"Billy, your father is
he's sleeping.

He's just asleep. "

"Wake him up.

Let's go. Wake him up.
Let's get out of here! "

"Leonard, get the car."

The funeral was the next day.

It's the hardest day,
because it's the farewell.

We four were
over the grave ...

with tree roots
coming out from the sides.

The coffin went down
with a bang.

And we followed my mother ...

when she approached
and threw a red rose.

And following the tradition
Jewish, Joel, Rip and me ...

Jack's children,
we put the earth on top.

The sound of earth and stones
that hit the wood ...

would echo in my
brain forever.

So it's over.

We buried our father.

We left
and we left it there.

Sundays are over.

When we get home,
it was full ...

of neighbors,
friends and relatives ...

everyone with food
and various subjects ...

to distract us
in the mourning period ...

called "shiva".

But for me,
the right is "tremor" ...

because what death causes me
Tremor, always.

And the house ...

that was always
full of laughter and jazz ...

now I was lonely,
dark, cold and sad.

I entered the room and closed
the door without seeing anyone.

How someone would change
what did I feel inside?

So I closed the door
and I was alone, day after day.

And everyone worried
with me...

because I never cried.

Then, one day,
I heard a laugh.

Lots of laughs,
of the whole family.

So, leave the room
and walked down the hall ...

to know who was
giving a show.

And it was Uncle Bern.

The glorious uncle Bern
was performing.

Everyone laughed a lot.
Even my mother.

I didn't believe it.

He was over
of losing his brother ...

his dearest person.
But he did a show ...

and got laughs,
making them forget ...

for a few minutes that they
they were in a house of mourning.

And I thought it was fantastic.
And Bern's legacy will always be ...

"even in pain, it's good
and it's important to laugh. "

Then, one day,
Wild Bill Davison came.

He sat right where
my father played mandolin ...

drew the trumpet
and played a blues.

So, Edmund Hall
drew his clarinet ...

and touched the most beautiful
version of
My Buddy
.

And then Marvel Shaw
I was on the double bass ...

Willard Lyon at the piano,
Eddie Condon on guitar ...

and Tyree Glenn on the trombone.

Zutty made a battery
with cake boxes.

And they did a show
improvised at home ...

that will never be forgotten.

Even my mother was hitting her feet.

When the music starts,
nobody stands still.

So, the time has come ...

of everyone coming back
for their lives.

"Hey you, Face, it will be
all right. Promise.

How do you know that never
Are you going to see him again?

We don't know yet.

Face...

think of the rose.

She is the most beautiful flower
perfumed from all ...

because it is the most beautiful
and the simplest.

But sometimes, you
you must prune the rose.

You must cut it ...

so that more
fragrant and more beautiful ...

in place.

You may not understand
now, Face ...

but one day, you will
understand. I guarantee.

One day, Face ...

you will think of the rose.

Understood?

I knew it.

You will always be the Face. "

Joel and Rip are back
� college ...

and we were just my mother
and me at the house.

"Bill, don't take it the wrong way,
but your brothers are gone ...

and now you need to be the man
of the House. Is its function. "

"Billy, we are
very proud.

Be strong. Your brothers
went back to school ...

and you need to be the man
of the House. Is its function. "

"Billy. Billy.

Be strong. Your mother
needs you.

Your brothers are gone.
Be the man of the house.

Is its function. "

I did not want this function.

But when everyone was gone ...

I stayed with her.

With the function.
The damn function.

The size of the function.
The irreparable emptiness in the heart.

And the first feeling
� with anger. You want answers.

Because now?
You are so angry ...

that you want to invade
the room of God.

"Excuse me.
I came to talk to Him.

I didn't score anything.
I want to talk to Him.

What's your name?
Pedro of what?

There you are.
Why did it?

You write right
by crooked lines?

I don't believe that
just said that!

It's not fair.
You are not a just God.

Do you think you're fair?
If you think so ...

why took my father
and left Mengele?

What justice is that?

Why did it?
What's good about that?

I'm 15.
Because now?

Is it the hand I have?
What cards do I play?

Great. You �
the bank owner.

For Christ!
How can you say ...

I didn't see him there.

You look great!

I didn't recognize him with arms
lowered. This is amazing!

What place!

Did you work with your father? Think
that I wanted to do that too.

I will never believe you.
How can I? See what you've done!

I will love other gods
before you. Pedro.

And there should be
an 11� commandment ...

"You will not be an idiotic god.

I didn't mean it.
It was nothing serious.

Can you do me a favor?
If you see him ...

you can say I spent
in the Chemistry test? "

Back to school
it was very difficult ...

because i needed
carry that rock.

But I developed
another skill.

� better describe it
by the name I gave.

I call her
of "the other party".

That's what I felt.
I was neither here nor there.

I was in another place that I saw,
but I couldn't see.

A place I heard,
but I didn't listen.

It was the other part of everything.

And I pushed the rock
daily at school.

Friends passed by,
having a lot of fun.

So I saw the girl
with a new boyfriend.

Blond with blue eye
and football player.

A Nazi bastard
with a convertible.

And I was confused.

Sometimes, I didn't know
what was worse ...

whether it was my father's death or me
not having won over the girl.

And I felt divided
and very guilty.

I was in mourning
because of who?

By him...

or for me?

"Basketball Tests"
said the poster in the gym.

I had to enter
for the basketball team.

I needed to do something
to leave the house!

The 1st day arrived, but it was
too early for me ...

they threw the ball and I didn't see it.
"Sorry. I didn't see it."

I hit the ball,
but she leaves the place ...

and went where I didn't want to!

Because the "other party"
it was blinding me ...

and I couldn't
mark nobody ...

and do nothing ...

because there was a rock
to load.

Three days of testing.
It was a disaster.

I was embarrassed
for my way of playing.

In the end, the coach called me
and I thought I would be cut.

But instead,
he asked a question ...

that no one has done since
the 15th of October.

"Are you okay?
How are things at home? "

"My God.
Don't look at me.

Don't look at me. Please.

Coach, I don't know
what's up with me.

I don't focus anymore
and I don't know where I am.

I don't know anymore
what am I doing...

and I only shoot low grades!
There is no one at home.

There is no one.
I'm very lonely.

There is no one at home.

You know what I do
after school?

Do you want to know?

I run home.
I'm not going by bus.

I run home.
I can't stay on the bus ...

because of the brooch
idiot I use.

I know what they think. � the son
of the guy who died in bowling.

I know what they
think. I know.

And when I get home,
Do you know what I do?

I cook. I do
my mother's dinner ...

because she is
looking for a job.

Because we have nothing.

And I want her to arrive
and see the ready dinner ...

so you don't have to do it
all alone.

That's what I do every day.
Everyday. And when I get home ...

she looks so sad
and very tired.

We sat down and everything
we do � eat.

Nobody says anything.
We only eat.

I can't make her laugh.

Before, I did it.
I love making her laugh.

But not now.

I try to study ...

but I can't
focus on anything.

I'm going to my room
and opening the book ...

I hear you.

I hear her cry
in the bedroom until I sleep ...

because the walls
they are too thin!

Damn it.

And he put me on the team.

It was the greatest kindness
that already made me.

We played for the 1st time.

It was at school
East Rockaway ...

I was at the bank,
watching Junior Varsity ...

that preceded Varsity.

I was there alone,
taking out the rock.

Two friends were behind me:
Harvey Kreitzman and Joe Ponte.

Our fans
were coming ...

to see the game
and as they entered ...

Harvey innocently
tells Joe Ponte ...

"Your father is here."
And I said "Where?"

My God. I didn't believe ...

but happened.

What to do?
I couldn't turn around.

What would I say? It didn't work
to explain. It happened.

So I sat like
if it was nothing ...

and I was looking
foward...

without seeing.
Listening without listening.

I didn't say more
with Harvey Kreitzman.

When I saw him in the hall,
I swerved.

Next week,
on November 22, 1963 ...

another Jack died.

A heavy sadness
fell on us ...

for months and months ...

until a Sunday night,
in February 1964.

My mother and I go
the Ed Sullivan Show.

Sundays were like that.
Dinner for two at Wing Lu ...

and back
to see Ed Sullivan.

That night something
made the country feel better.

The Beatles were
at Ed Sullivan.

And for the first time
in months, I smiled.

And for the first time ...

I liked another
type of music.

And during that
magic program ...

I only heard ...

It wasn't 60 Minutes.

It was the Beatles.

But for my mother,
it was the death of jazz.

The rest of the year was
more of the same.

� drift in the other part,
wandering and wandering and wandering.

So, I started last
school year in 1965.

And I had played
on the basketball team ...

the way I wanted it.
I earned my place.

Our team was great in 1965.
The "Marines of Long Beach".

And everyone just spoke
of a game ...

that we did against
the Erasmus Hall High ...

from Brooklyn NY.
A scary team.

They were the 2nd team of colleges
from all over the country that year.

Team # 1 was from New York,
the Powell Memorial.

The pivot had more
2.10m high ...

and his name was Lew Alcindor.

Later, he turned
Kareem Abdul-Jabbar ...

and it was also Izzy Yizkutz
for 6 months, you know?

Our coaches knew each other.
Erasmus agreed to come to Long Beach ...

to play with us
in a friendly match.

It was in the papers.
It was great news.

There were two cultures.
There was Erasmus ...

a school
predominantly black ...

the ghetto and with a lot of claw.

And Long Beach was
a white school ...

middle class
and mostly Jews.

There were two cultures.

There was Erasmus and they
played "basketball".

We were from Long Island
and we played "basketball".

They scared us ...

as soon as they arrived
To our school.

The Erasmus team has arrived
on a Greyhound bus.

And there was another bus
for the kids on the team.

We were in the dressing room,
waxing your legs ...

and the coach arrived,
saying "Come here.

Luther, Fitzy, Johnny,
Billy and Doug. Come. "

Right. The Erasmus team
Very good ...

but we are also.
And we'll show them.

Who are we? "" Marines. "
"What we do?" "We fight."

There were thousands on the court
of Erasmus fans.

Everyone used dashikis,
African turban ...

and embroidered hats.

1965 was a terrible year
for civil rights.

The south was exploding,
literally.

There were "strange fruits"
all over the south.

Blacks sought in Africa
your identity in a country ...

who still denied them
their civil rights.

The game took place in the middle of everything
that and all that anger.

We entered excited
on our court ...

and we were welcomed
for thousands of them ...

with a wave
and strange songs.

"Kill them!"

And our team was
on the other side, singing ...

Please don't hurt
our players

They are cool
and get hurt easily

We were 55 points behind
and the 2nd time begins.

I was sitting there ...

in my seat at the bank
and my mother, seven rows behind.

My mother was
always present.

In that respect, she was a great mother,
but in basketball?

When we start to lose,
she did so ...

"Coach, put on Crystal.
It can't get worse. Let's go!"

The coach looks at me
and says something that scared me.

"Billy, come in."

"Got crazy?
This is a game. "

I enter and so
that announce my name ...

floor on the court and all
on the Long Beach side ...

get up
and applaud me standing.

They scream my name
while I walk.

I don't know what Erasmus
thought about the time.

"It's their secret weapon."

Everyone started laughing,
I got into the character ...

and started walking
like a giant.

I looked at the bank
Erasmus, debauchery ...

and I put the shirt inside
with authority.

They started laughing
and pointing at me.

I looked and my number
it was in the underwear.

The game resumes and I
was scoring ...

a building
and two pairs of socks.

He was huge and had
your own climate.

He was gigantic.
He was so big ...

that on his crucifix
there was a real man!

And he was taking
make fun of me and mocking.

"Are you Oz?"

I represent the team
basketball

The basketball team
The basketball team

We represent
the basketball team

I try to tag him and the people laugh.
I see he wants to play with me ...

hitting the ball loudly.
But I take it from him ...

the ball rolls, I dive,
he dives into me ...

and the referee says "Foul!"

You and you.

Let's go to the center of the court.
Everyone laughing ...

and for the first time, blacks
and whites agree on something ...

that I look like an idiot.
It's funny, I know.

He was here
and me down here.

We seem like a point
and comma. I already know.

He doesn't even have to jump
to catch the ball ...

both sides die laughing ...

and I bow my head,
as in a comedy scene.

But I hear my mother's voice,
overlapping everything.

"Come on, Billy. Come on.
Do your best! "

She was right.
It is a good motto for life.

"Do your best."
It made perfect sense.

No matter what you do,
if you say ...

who did his best,
everything is fine. "Do your best."

So, confident,
I looked up ...

for his groin
and said "This is ridiculous.

How are you?"

The referee whistles and plays
the ball up.

So everything stayed
in slow motion.

I remember the ball spinning
in the light of the gym.

I could read it. "Spalding".

"Do your best."

I jump and get off the ground done
a missile from Cape Canaveral.

I flew so much that I felt
the friction of air in the body ...

when going up, listening
the public say ...

"Billy is going to get the ball!"
At the end of the jump ...

I see the ball coming down,
I shake hands, close my eyes ...

I spin and hit
the ball with desire!

"Damn it!"

"Damn it!"

I did my best. Unfortunately,
right in his testicles.

I was expelled for lack
intentional...

and it was one of the worst
nights of my life.

After the game, the staff
from school came to me.

"What a great idea
hit him in the testicles.

I don't believe you
had that idea at the time.

It was too much.

When I saw that,
he made such a big poop ...

that even cracked
the floor of the court.

It was incredible. You saw
his eyes at the time?

It looked like a slot machine.

And little birds appeared
around his head.

They were birds.
Like a cartoon.

Billy, it was amazing. It was awesome! "

That was the director
of my school.

Then, in June 1965,
in the same cinema ...

where I kissed the girl
for the first time...

at the Laurel Theater,
I graduated from high school.

Now, it was my turn
to go to college.

Go to college
it shouldn't happen ...

after my father died.
Three weeks later ...

things calmed down
and Joel and Rip left.

Mom entered my
room and said "Sit down.

We need to talk."
"About what, mom?"

"College."

"Your father and I had
a dream...

that our children
go to college.

And I want to perform
that dream.

When it's your time,
you will go. "

"Thank you, mom."

And she became the biggest
hero of all.

My mother was 50 years old
and my father died in front of her.

And she should grow up
again with a boy ...

that kept growing.
And we had nothing.

And the idea was
"I'm going to a school ...

I will take dictation
and typing ...

to work soon
as secretary ...

to have money. "
No sooner said than done.

She studied all day.
I came home from school ...

and left my duty
to help you with hers.

I read business letters
for her, in a saying ...

and she wrote everything
with those abbreviations.

Then she wrote
words...

on a typewriter.
Do you remember?

First, there were 35, 45 ...

fifty and belt, 65, 75, 85 ...

100 words per minute.
And she finds a job ...

as sector manager
in a psychiatric clinic.

Perfect to me.

Free samples.

And for all that time,
she never complained ...

and we become a team.

And she never lost
the sense of humor.

"Mother, you are exhausted."

"They are schizophrenics.
The work is double. "

And she keeps $ 2,500 ...

for me to study
at Marshall University ...

in West Virginia,
to play on 2nd base ...

because I got it right
a curved ball.

I was 17
when I leave home.

I was too young.
I had never left home ...

and I rarely slept
at a friend's house.

I never talked about sex
With my dad.

We talked once
about the girl ...

but none of us
I wanted it that way.

Then, at gate 33 of La Guardia,
before leaving home...

I talked about sex
with my mother.

"Billy, honey, before I go ...

we must speak
about girls. "

"Mother, I know."
"I'm glad we talked!"

We embrace
as much as we could.

It's hard to say goodbye
to our heroes.

But the brain soon says
"Come on. It's time."

Because if you create well
your children, they should go.

I walked to the plane
and I didn't look back.

And I heard 3 words
that my mother screamed ...

and that would change my
freshman life.

"Don't wash there!"

The 1st year of college.

Parties, panties thefts,
marijuana and beer!

I didn't do any of that.
I wanted and I tried ...

but it was hard to go
with that rock.

You can say it takes me
to heal me.

But honestly,
it was hard to have fun.

I went home in the summer.
I wanted to improve in the 2nd year.

I was on the beach, playing ball
with my friend Steve Cohen ...

waiting for the baseball plan
of autumn and playing ball.

And a girl in a bikini
passes right in the middle ...

and she walked beautifully.
I didn't know her.

"Steve, who is she?
I don't know her. "

"Janis Goldfinger.
to move. "

"Are you really?"

"I'm going to marry her."
I went to her and introduced myself.

I said "How are you?"

I asked her out
and she accepted.

And we started to leave.

All summer long.
And we fell in love.

A true love.
Hall of Fame.

A love that transformed
the rock into sand.

I should go back
for Marshall ...

but I didn't go.

I was 18
and Janis was 17 years old.

But I knew that she
was to get married ...

and we must never leave
that chance pass.

And I was right. We are
married for 43 years.

Today the chops
they're on my back.

I was 22 years old
and Janis was 21 years old.

I had performed
mom's dream.

I was the 3rd son
to graduate from college.

I graduated from NYU,
as a filmmaker ...

and had a job
guaranteed.

If the performance does not
right for me ...

I would have something solid
as director.

So we face
difficulties.

We came to live here.

There was an apartment
1 bedroom upstairs.

We lived there for a while.

It was very good to have sex
in this house...

with someone
that it wasn't me.

I think I got the hang of it
because 3 years later ...

Jennifer Amy Crystal
was born with 3.7kg ...

and was the dependent
of more beautiful IR.

My life was perfect.
A beautiful wife, a beautiful baby ...

no career and no future.
Perfect.

I was 26 years old.
The clock did not stop.

I knew I wanted
be a comedian ...

but start from scratch
it was scary.

Fear dominated me.
I was paralyzed ...

and did nothing.
So Janis said ...

"Honey, I have a plan.
I'll be back to work ...

you will take care of Jenny ...

and when I arrive,
you will leave me ...

and go to NY to try
something in the comedy clubs ...

and turn the comedian
that you want to be ...

because I believe in you. "
And that's what we did.

Janis was going to work
and I took care of Jenny.

I was Mr. Mother before
it becomes fashionable.

Her nursery was called
"Mom and me. And him."

And when changing diapers
I said ...

"Honey, look carefully
what am I doing...

because one day, you
will do the same to me. "

Janis came home,
I would deliver Jenny ...

get in the car and go
to New York, to enter at 2 am ...

at Catch a Rising Star
of Rick Newman ...

or Improv. I arrived
At 3am, I woke up at 6am ...

and started with Jenny,
writing jokes ...

all day and it went on for weeks.
That was the plan.

And I think it worked,
because you are here.

And I will say. This does not
happens to nobody ...

unless someone
dear say ...

"I believe in you."

We left Long Beach.
It was time.

My job was
in California ...

and things were
working.

I was excited.
And we went west.

And it was hard to leave
the only city ...

that the two of us
we actually know.

Our friends,
Janis's parents ...

my brothers, my mother ...

and this house.

There was a lot of history
in this house.

We grew up here,
we ate right here ...

very well, and we laughed here.
And we made people laugh here.

Joel, Rip and I were
the Nair�bi Trio.

I was a Yankee here.

I saw the 61� home run
Roger Maris here.

I saw the 1st Tonight Show
Johnny Carson here.

I heard the album
The 2000
Year Old Man
here.

I saw Bob Hope present
Oscar, every year ...

right here.

I saw little John-John
say goodbye here.

I saw the Beatles here ...

and I saw the man step on
on the moon here.

I fell in love here
and I became a father here.

I was in mourning here.

It was my home.

Many stories.

The last start
on Halloween night ...

in 2001. And again ...

the whole country was
in the "other part".

I was coming down the highway ...

still with the aftermath
from Ground Zero ...

for the 4th game of that
strange World Series ...

with the Yankees against
the Diamondbacks.

"Strange" because it was
the only World Series ...

that the country wanted
the Yankees won.

So that something good
happen in the city.

I was in the car,
My cell phone rang...

and it was my brother Joel.

"Billy, it's bad news.
Mom had a stroke. "

"When?" "It's an hour.
I found her in the living room ...

and we are in emergency
from Long Beach hospital.

They're doing tests,
but she is not well.

Can you come? "

"Sure. It'll take me an hour and a half.
Tell her that I'm going. "

"Janis, my mother
had a stroke. "

That's what I said.
What else would I say?

The doctor said ...

"It's true, Mr. Crystal.
Your mother had a stroke.

But if it is to have a stroke,
this guy is the best. "

He explained that it was in a
curable part of the brain ...

and that she was going to recover
good. "Great."

"But the left arm
hers is weak. "

"I understand."

"She is very confused.
And she is there. "

"Thank you, doctor.
Let's talk more. "

Come on, honey.

Mother. Mom, I'm here.
Janis is here.

Rip is coming. Joel is here.
Everybody here. I have good news.

I spoke to the doctor and he said
that you will recover.

Isn't it great? "

She looked at me,
quite confused ...

and spoke to me like
if it was a little girl.

"My head hurts."

"I know it does."

"You are in pain
head, right? "

"I am."

I held her hand
and massaged the back of your neck ...

where did she say
it was hurting.

"I will always take care
of you, mother.

"I will always take care of you."
"Thanks."

And she stopped talking and just looked
forward, silently ...

all night
and the next day ...

just looking forward,
in silence, for nothing.

I panicked
and I went to the doctor.

"Did you tell me everything?"

"Why doesn't she speak?"
"Easy, Billy."

"I know it's difficult,
but try to understand. "

"She can speak."

"But she doesn't want to talk.
She is angry. "

And she was furious.

Furious that God
insulted his body.

"How do I get her to talk?
I want to talk to her. "

"Billy, next time,
do not use the word "spill".

Upon hearing "spill",
she gets angry and distances herself.

Just talk to her
about things in common.

Just talk to her.
Try to do that. "

"Sorry if I ...

Yesterday's game was too much.
The Yankees lost 3 to 1 ...

with two balls out
and nobody to save.

Paul O'Neill countered
to the left field.

And do you know who came? Tino.
Your favorite. Tino Martinez.

He hit a ball
for the home run.

The stadium came down.
I never saw that!

And in the 10th inning,
Jeter did a home run ...

and they won!
And she said ...

"It was time.
Derek didn't play anything. "

Spills are like thieves
bank. They break into the safe ...

and steal everything you
loves more.

Invade the brain
and run away with the past.

But she fought,
as you always did.

The arm came back and she left
the bed with a walker ...

a cane and nothing more. And all
day we will rehabilitate her.

She looked like an athlete
training for an event.

And all this time,
she never complained ...

and still managed to keep
your sense of humor.

"Nurse, if you want
let me walk quickly ...

put Robert Redford
at the end of the hallway."

So I had to travel
and I was sad ...

but she was fine.
I needed to spend 3 days away.

It was an event that I
could not deselect.

I went to Seattle, WA ...

to do a show
at a charity event ...

to help children ...

who had lost
parents in the attack.

I would make a presentation
stand-up ...

something I didn't do
9 years ago ...

an event that would bring me
up here.

I called her in the morning.

"Hello, mom."
"Billy, how was the show?"

She remembered.

"It was great. It was really good."

"And it was in a big theater,
like Radio City. "

"Remember
from Radio City, mom? "

"Sure. That's where we saw
The Jester
with Danny Kaye .... "

Remember
of the vessel with the pestle? "

I gave all the details
of the jokes.

She liked to hear
the best jokes from my show.

But not this time.
She interrupted me.

"Billy, honey,
were you happy? "

"Yes, mother. I was.
It was a long time ago. "

"Well dear.
Aren't things like that? "

"Sure. Mom, I'll get it
the air bridge.

I'll be there in the morning.

I'll spend the whole week.
It will be great.

What you want in the cafe�
in the morning? You can ask. "

She cut me off again.
"Billy, dear ...

no need to run
because of me.

I'm fine.
And you're busy.

Billy, I'll see you
when you can. "

It was the last time
that we speak.

One hour later,
the thieves are back ...

and this time, they took it.

So I was orphaned.

I was no longer
stuck to the ground.

I was 15 years old
at the first time...

and 53 years on the 2nd time ...

but the tears have
the same taste.

The rock has the same
weight and size ...

the "other party" covers
all the same ...

and the anger increased.

But an omnipotent being
told me once ...

"It is the hand that I received.
The cards I have to play. "

"Maybe 1.67m?"

"Please.

Please.
Just a little more. "

"You will lose your father
with 15 years."

"Did you shuffle?"

"May your mother have
a long life. "

"Marrying a
incredible woman ... "

"have two beautiful daughters
and four grandchildren. "

"Do what you always do
wanted to do ... "

"since it made them laugh
in the living room."

"I will stay with them.
I'll bet everything. "

"Show your cards."

We sell the house.
We needed to sell it.

Without mom I wouldn't do it
sense to stay with her.

Today she is someone else's ...

but it doesn't belong to you.

Cause I close my eyes
and I'm going there ...

whenever I want.

700 Sundays is not a long time
for a son to be with his father.

But it was enough
to win gifts ...

that I open until today and share
with my children and grandchildren.

Gifts of love,
laughter, good food ...

Jews and jazz,
dinners and whiskey ...

curved balls in the snow,
Bill Cosby, Mickey Mantle ...

uncle Bern and "think of the rose".

"Understood?

"I knew it."

I have a recurring dream.
I'm in a car ...

in a Plymouth Belvedere
1957 gray ...

sitting in front
because I am small.

There is no one else,
but I'm not afraid ...

because the car knows
where you need to go.

He walks alone.

And soon we arrived
42nd Street, NY.

We passed the Commodore
full of people...

by the Commodore Hotel ...

we stopped in front of Grand
Central Station and the car stops.

The door opens and I leave.
I follow the crowd ...

I pass the oyster bar,
I go up the ramp ...

and I reach the lobby.
But this time ...

the stars are real ...

and the brightness of the sky
It is very beautiful.

And the terminal still
it's full of men.

But this time ...

they are dressed
with my father...

in white shirt
with the rolled sleeve ...

open collar
and a tie hanging.

And now I know what they
are waiting.

They are expecting parents
your children.

I see him, he sees me
and he is fine.

He doesn't seem
worried, upset ...

and not even angry.

And we walk
towards each other.

We don't have to run.

"Hello, Dad." He smiled,
put your hand on my shoulder ...

and says "What is lead?"

"Pb." "Very good, Billy."

"Have you eaten yet?"

"I see you like this
that I can. "

Who wants a waffle?
Anyone want?

Contribute by becoming a VIP user
and remove all ads from www.SubtitleDB.org