Original subtitles

Good night. And I kept looking for you.

And...

We break one of these beams, October.

Remember, like we break.

Go on this side.

Easy.

Now, you ready?

Boy, you'd make a great dad, Tommy.

Don't start with me. I mean it.

Wouldn't he? Oh, absolutely.

All right. I know I'm going to regret this, but why?

Well, if you can love an ugly old piece of junk like that, just think how you'd

feel about a cute little baby in diapers.

Very funny.

Come on, put that down and help us.

Just a sec.

Okay, if I ask you something personal.

Okay. When you guys were kids, who was your favorite family on TV?

Well, believe it or not, I love the Greats. But the Parks family was pretty

cool, too.

Yeah.

You didn't like those shows?

Nah. Too syrupy for me.

Both of them.

Now, the Flintstones.

That's entertaining.

You'd want Fred and Wilma as your mom and dad?

There's nothing about them being my folks.

I'll get it.

Listen to this.

Sir Desmond Ashford, director of the London Society of Antiquities, wants to

hire us.

To do what?

Uh, find something called the Spear of Destiny.

Oh, isn't that the, uh... It's an ancient artifact.

A Roman soldier supposedly stabbed Jesus Christ with it while he was on the

cross. That's good.

It was stolen from a museum in Panama.

Blah, blah, blah, blah. Blah, blah, blah, blah.

I think he's either here or on the way. Any suspects?

Two maybes.

Lyle Decker, who's a guru to a bunch of militants. And, um... Oh, David Kelly.

Better known as Dave the Wave.

The surfer.

Yeah. Former world champ.

Now we're the hill.

Hey, there's a surfing contest north of here in Sayulita. Starts Saturday.

Charity event.

Nice cover.

Speaking of charity, how much is the society willing to pay us?

$5 ,000 as a retainer and $20 ,000 if we recover the sphere.

Well, they got my vote.

Surfers, militants, what's the connection?

Well, the sphere.

Decker wants it to rally supporters to his cause and tell himself a big buck.

You're kidding, right? No.

According to the fact, that's what the sphere is all about.

It's a rallying symbol for the loony fringe.

Just what we need. Another Adolf Hitler.

Oh, don't joke about things like that.

If we have another world war, we will be watching the Flintstones. We'll be the

Flintstones.

Paraphrase Albert Einstein, I'm in place.

So, are we in or not?

Well, fax your Desmond at the society and tell them the good news.

Man, too bad the contest ain't today.

With sets like these, I'd break up ten every ride.

Yeah, well, if everything goes to plan, you may not be around for the contest.

Lyle Decker is sponsoring the surfing contest?

With his wife, Hilda.

Yes.

It's unbelievable.

What?

Well, don't you find that an incredible coincidence?

Look, the only two suspects we have, and suddenly they're conveniently linked

together by a charity event.

Oh, it gets better. Dave, the wave is on the guest list of the party at Decker's

Villa. Party?

What party?

Am I the only one around here who's out of the loop?

We've got to get invited to Decker's party.

Then we can give the villa a quick once -over, see if he's got the spear or

knows anything about the robbery.

Easier said than done.

Can I say something?

I don't think it should be too hard to crash the party. No, no, no, no. There's

a better way. Do you want me to tell you?

I don't want you to put your hand down. It's not junior high, you know.

Sorry. My mom's always getting on me for that. Joanna, cut to the chase.

Well, this is a charity event, right?

So let's be charitable.

How are you? Welcome.

Welcome. Hello.

How are you? Welcome.

Welcome.

Hello.

I have to meet the police.

Everybody, your attention, please.

I hope you're enjoying yourself.

Wonderful. I have a surprise for you. A fashion show featuring the latest in hot

and funky beachwear brought to you by Acapulco Heat.

Check that out.

Love that Joanna.

She would have made a great thief.

Still can.

Bingo. How good were you?

The best.

Maybe a little bit.

Voilà. That's a good one.

Damn!

Sorry, I didn't...

Perhaps you'd like to tell me what you're looking for.

Oh, the bathroom. We only came in here for our clothes.

I don't think so.

Dispose of them.

We're not thieves, I swear.

Really, we're looking for the bathroom to get dressed.

Behind the painting.

That's my fault, Mr. Decker.

I'm very passionate about Mexican abstract, and this one is beautiful.

We didn't know there was a safe behind the painting, or an alarm.

Coming through.

There you are.

I've been looking all over for you guys.

This will be cool.

Lyle, dude, what's going on? I'm not in your business.

Now, is that any way to speak to an old buddy?

What do you want, Kelly?

Well, these two babes are friends of mine.

If they've done anything to take you off, I'm sure they didn't mean it.

Right, guys?

Absolutely. Ask your wife.

We came here to support a charity.

Charity is as charity does, I always said.

Well, perhaps you're right, Mr. Kelly.

We're ashamed to spoil such a lovely party over a minor misunderstanding.

Please, accept my apologies, ladies.

Oh, gladly.

Thank you.

Now, if you'll follow me, you can join us for drinks.

I owe you one. Me too, Mr. Kelly.

I got dibs on the French baby. Man, she's to die for. Forget it, Brownie.

YMA on a big day.

So you're telling me that all of these suits are from your shop?

You know what's amazing about these suits? Ladies, it was a lovely

Wasn't it? Yeah, very nice.

What are you doing? Did you see I'm busy?

Doing what?

Humiliating me?

Maybe I should go. No, no, no, you stay right where you are.

Maybe you're drunk.

I'm not so drunk that I don't know what's going on between you two.

All right, just stop it. Come on. Oh, it's true.

You're pathetic, you know that? You think you're going to rule the world

this bunch of misfits? Well, let me tell you something, Mr. Lyle Decker. Stop

it. Stop it.

Gentlemen, why don't you take my wife upstairs and see if she gets some rest

her bedroom?

Don't you touch me. Let go of me.

I'm sorry. Sometimes Hilda doesn't realize what a spectacle she makes of

when she drinks.

That's okay.

Oh, could you excuse me one moment?

Sure.

Come back, my friend.

My friend, please, come.

Come.

Mr. Well, I want to thank you all for coming here today, taking time out of

busy schedule. I appreciate that. I'm very grateful.

As you know, this is a very special...

occasion today.

Our movement is gaining momentum all over the world. Every day I get hundreds

phone calls and letters from people just like you, ready to rally to our cause.

The day has finally come for us as supremacists to take back control of the

world from the minorities.

Yes? Come, I found something.

What? A shipping manifest.

It belongs to the fighter, Island Queen of Panama City.

That's where the spear was stolen from.

I don't suppose it was lifted in the cargo.

No, but listen to this.

There is a shipment of Panamanian art invoicing Mrs. Hilda Decker to be

delivered at the old bull ring on the place.

Bingo. Okay, I'll pass it on to Joanne and I get out of there, okay?

Okay.

I've got it, Tommy. The Island Queen.

Docs and PV tomorrow afternoon.

I'll be mad.

That's bull.

Nicole wouldn't just leave without telling me. Well, that's between the two

you. All I know is that she left with a gentleman in a Mercedes.

Dark blue, wouldn't it?

I would still like to take a look around.

Of course. Be my guest.

Take her wherever she wants to go, will you?

Oh, my mistake.

Pardon?

I should know better than to lock a French woman in a wine cellar.

How dare you lock me in anywhere?

No, no, no.

Temper, temper.

Vous êtes un infâme goujat.

You want temper?

I'll give you temper.

No more

games.

Who are you?

What are you doing here?

Tell me how they will find you washed up on the beach.

I will tell you nothing.

Not until we mourn. Let me go.

All right, now.

Let's have it.

Who are you?

Why are you going through my things?

Check it out.

Sounds like I'm not the only unwelcome guest.

Drop it.

I don't think so.

So help me.

I'll shoot her.

Go ahead.

She means diddly squat to me. Thanks a lot.

You're bluffing.

Well, there's one way to find out.

Please.

You don't want this.

Well, you certainly took your sweet time.

I've dreamed of this moment too long to rush it.

I also wanted to make her sweat a little.

Charming.

What did I ever do to you?

Personally? Oh, nothing.

But dozens like you have made so many trips to my husband's bedroom.

You've worn down the carpet.

He wasn't my type.

Is he your type?

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Hold it.

We may need her later.

For what?

To pay off Ramirez.

I kind of promised him I'd have a couple of babes lined up when he died.

You're a pimp now? Hey, it's a guy thing.

Trust me.

He just needs a little TLC.

Just like the rest of them.

And I hate this waiting.

Me too.

Look, maybe we should hit the bill now instead of waiting till after dark.

No, no, that's a bad idea. Somebody may see us.

And, uh... Yeah, right, bud.

Well, besides, I... What? Come on, come on, talk to me. You got one of those gut

feelings, right?

Either that or a bad case of border chillies.

Oh, join the club. I've had heartburn since lunch.

Don't salsa.

Tastes great. It eats the whole right through your... Joanna.

Look, I've learned to trust your judgment, okay? If you say wait, we'll

But if Nicole's prisoner, then she's in danger.

I don't even know if I'm right. I just have to... Look, premonitions, sixpence,

whatever. It works for you.

I'll take it to the bank.

I'll definitely steal the spare and offer to trade it for Nicole.

What do you think?

What do I think?

I know, it's a dumb idea.

What I think is, I'm glad you decided to stop sucking corn and move to the big

city. Hey, I never sucked corn.

Well, not a lot.

Now remember, just show Ramirez the money. Don't give it to him until he

the spear.

What, do you think he's going to rip us off?

Why not?

He's already proven his dishonesty by lying on the cargo manifest.

Maybe his greed doesn't end there.

It will if he's dead.

True.

How are you going to take the living?

You'll see.

What are you talking about?

I'm not going with you.

That's what I got you for.

Brownie, shame on you.

Did you forget to tell her? Tell me what?

There's been a change of plans, sweetheart.

What the hell is going on here?

You've been set up.

Can't you see that?

Set up?

What are you talking about? Sit down. How dare you, you waterlogged

Let go of me.

Waterlogged Neanderthal?

I like it. It fits.

Calm down, my love. There's no reason to go ballistic over a friendly little

double cross.

You conniving bastard.

Probably.

You're trading me for her.

Bingo.

What about Panama City and all that moonlight on Rosie's charm you fed me?

Garbage.

I'm ashamed to say. You're not ashamed of anything.

Shallow is as shallow does.

Lock her in the wine cellar. Why wait time?

Why not kill me right here?

Oh, my sweet.

How could you ever think I could do something like that? Because you cannot

afford to let me live.

And you don't get too comfortable.

You're next.

You mean...

We won't always ask, Paris.

Forget Paris.

I am more interested in our future.

Oh, Wildfield, you're right.

My future is only temporary.

Life's only temporary.

Why should relationships be any different?

Hmm.

Live hard, die young, and be buried with a good -looking corpse, right?

Works for me.

What about you?

Oiling my wheelchair was never something I looked forward to.

No, I meant what about your business?

And your partner?

Kat will understand.

There was never enough money for two anyway.

So, we have a deal?

On one condition.

Name it. You do not kill me until we spend a million.

You'll get on with me.

A boy just delivered this. Says it's from Nicole.

It's from the law.

Hi, guys.

As you can see, I am at Lyle's Villa. What is she doing there with a glass of

champagne? Kat, you must be wondering what I am doing here. Wow, you guys are

really in sync.

I'm ashamed to say this, but I was too chicken to face you and tell you the

truth. Truth?

I'm quitting Acapulco Heat.

I'll bet someone's making her say that. I know you must think that I'm being

forced to say this, but I'm not.

This is all my idea.

Kelly's taking me to Paris.

And since I've always wanted to live there, I know well.

I know you will understand why I must leave so suddenly.

Au revoir, my friend.

I've always wanted to live there and nowhere else.

What a crock.

Nicole knew we'd pick up on that.

She must really be in big trouble.

Okay, we're going in.

I read you.

What is she doing with that?

Good question.

Where's Lyle Decker?

Curious on curious, you said, Alan.

Yeah.

This ain't Wonderland.

I can't do this, Ramirez.

I planned this. I came up with the money.

Shut up!

You've got a choice.

Deal with Kelly or pick an undertaker.

Deal.

What about her?

After you're finished having your fun with her, pass her over to the... Pick a

door so the crew...

Let's move the crate.

It's not too late, Hector.

Late for what?

Come in with me, and I'll make you rich.

I'm happy.

I'm dead, huh?

I'll take my chances with Kelly.

Please.

I don't know. We couldn't see what happened. There's no time to find out.

They're leaving.

Look, keep this line open because if these jokers are headed back to the

we might need your help.

What do you want me to do?

Nothing right now.

Look, just jump in your car, head for the villa, and stay in touch.

Uh -huh.

That's great.

Nice going, guys.

They're on their way.

We did it, baby.

Old Kelly's pulled it off.

Well, let us celebrate.

I'll get some.

Bring two bottles.

It's just one party. I don't want anything.

Come on, come on. Where are you, Joanna?

Hi, you've reached Acapulco Beach Faction. We're not in at the moment, but

you leave your name and number, we'll call you right back.

Damn.

Joanna, this is Nicole.

Tell Kat and Tommy that policeman has come to see us.

You and me, we... we could have fun together.

Now you're just a meal for the crabs.

Hey, you in position, Joanna?

Roger.

Okay, do it 30 seconds, and then do what I told you.

You got it.

Okay, Fred.

Don't say I didn't try to tell you.

What difference does that make? You don't own this damn road. Oh, you're

Don't you know anything about right of way? That's bull.

Oh, you're a green duck. Just before it's eyes appear. You don't own this

road.

What the... What did you do to my truck?

My car wouldn't start. I tried to tell you, but you cut me off.

Tommy, not now.

Yeah, but look at it. It's all crunched in.

Oh, how would you know? Your whole truck's one big fender bender. Hello?

Now, we're running out of time, so get with it.

All right, all right, all right. You stay here and don't put any more dents

my truck.

Oh, how would you know if I did?

You ever

do

any surfing?

No. Oh, that's too bad.

You don't know what you're missing.

I think it was goodbye.

You know what? All my life I've had this dream.

It's summer, and a bunch of us spend the day hanging out at the beach, waxing

our boards, dreaming of this ginormous set of waves that'll give us the ride of

our lives.

And then one Monday, Big Monday we called it, it happened.

Monster set.

Each wave bigger and more perfect than the last.

Pure heaven.

After that, everything that we had done or were going to do just didn't matter

anymore because we had lived our dream and experienced perfection.

Is there a point to all of this?

Today, my big Monday.

Yeah, alone.

Okay, you take him while I go in and find Nicole.

Sorry,

I kept you home.

Gun, Hilda.

It's not true, you know.

I mean about this beer.

Having it doesn't mean you can rule the world.

The gun.

Something wrong?

Worse than wrong.

What? Like what?

This spear is a fake.

Impossible. The crack came right from the ship. It looks perfect.

I don't care. I looked up the history of the spear on my computer and...

and... Right.

Nice try, Joanna.

No, I'm serious.

The genuine spear has three rings.

Sort of like a second -hand artifact.

Congratulations. You really had it going there. I did, didn't I?

Ah, this sphere is beautiful, isn't it?

If you're into spheres, it is.

But for scaring me, I am deducting the share from our business.

Hey, no fair.

I'm kidding.

I'm not.

Get her money.

I need to fix my truck.

Just get that for fair.

I know how to make it run better.

And it won't go too down.

Yeah? How?

First, remove the pole board.

What? So your legs and feet can touch the ground.

My legs and... Yeah.

You know, like... What? What's down?

You ever know, do?

That's good.

Shut up, Wilma.

I was going to ask you to do something.

There.