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1
00:00:16,581 --> 00:00:17,408
Come on!
2
00:00:17,452 --> 00:00:20,846
We're in a hurry here!
3
00:00:20,890 --> 00:00:22,848
Welcome to Burgerphile.
4
00:00:22,892 --> 00:00:25,329
Would you like to try
my new veggie-shake?
5
00:00:25,373 --> 00:00:28,202
I would never want to try that.
6
00:00:28,245 --> 00:00:30,160
Are you ready to order?
7
00:00:30,204 --> 00:00:31,335
Yes.
8
00:00:31,379 --> 00:00:35,078
I'll have a plain hamburger,
no cheese.
9
00:00:35,122 --> 00:00:36,862
Okay, cheeseburger, what else?
10
00:00:36,906 --> 00:00:40,649
No. No. Not a cheeseburger.
Hamburger.
11
00:00:40,692 --> 00:00:44,870
And I want it plain:
just the meat and bun.
12
00:00:44,914 --> 00:00:46,263
Do you want cheese on that?
13
00:00:46,307 --> 00:00:47,395
No!
14
00:00:47,438 --> 00:00:49,614
Plain. Meat and bun only.
15
00:00:49,658 --> 00:00:50,659
What else?
16
00:00:50,702 --> 00:00:53,488
A medium cola. Light ice.
17
00:00:53,531 --> 00:00:56,012
Did I mention I want
my hamburger plain?
18
00:00:56,056 --> 00:00:59,668
And I'll get two Double-Third
Pounder with cheese meals,
19
00:00:59,711 --> 00:01:07,284
uh..large, double meat, and...
um... hmm... oh... okay,
20
00:01:07,328 --> 00:01:09,243
a chocolate shake.
21
00:01:09,286 --> 00:01:11,419
Drive thru.
22
00:01:11,462 --> 00:01:12,507
Here's your food, sirs.
23
00:01:12,550 --> 00:01:14,117
Thank you for choosing
Burgerphile.
24
00:01:14,161 --> 00:01:15,858
Drive thru.
25
00:01:15,901 --> 00:01:18,600
Can we also grab a
bunch of ketchup?
26
00:01:18,643 --> 00:01:22,430
Umm, a BUNCH of ketchup?
27
00:01:22,473 --> 00:01:25,172
Do they take the ketchup
packet loss directly out
28
00:01:25,215 --> 00:01:26,434
of your salary?
29
00:01:26,477 --> 00:01:30,264
Just grab a handful and
throw it in!
30
00:01:30,307 --> 00:01:31,830
Drive thru.
31
00:01:34,137 --> 00:01:35,269
Oh, come on!
32
00:01:35,312 --> 00:01:37,401
Stop the car!
33
00:01:39,360 --> 00:01:40,187
Oh hey!
34
00:01:40,230 --> 00:01:41,362
Haven't seen you in awhile.
35
00:01:41,405 --> 00:01:42,493
How've you been?
36
00:01:42,537 --> 00:01:43,625
Uh - great!
37
00:01:43,668 --> 00:01:46,323
Well, not great, but good.
38
00:01:46,367 --> 00:01:49,457
Well, not good. Despondent?
39
00:01:49,500 --> 00:01:51,241
You look nice.
40
00:01:51,285 --> 00:01:54,157
Anyway, I just went through
the drive thru and you guys
41
00:01:54,201 --> 00:01:55,289
got my order wrong.
42
00:01:55,332 --> 00:01:58,466
Well, not you, specifically,
I mean-
43
00:01:58,509 --> 00:02:00,337
What seems to be the
problem here?
44
00:02:00,381 --> 00:02:02,122
This gentleman got
the wrong order.
45
00:02:02,165 --> 00:02:03,514
That's impossible.
46
00:02:03,558 --> 00:02:05,777
I'm pretty sure the mistake
is on your end, sir.
47
00:02:05,821 --> 00:02:06,952
What?!
48
00:02:06,996 --> 00:02:08,780
This burger has cheese
on it!
49
00:02:08,824 --> 00:02:10,347
I am allergic to cheese!
50
00:02:10,391 --> 00:02:13,872
You must have forgotten to
ask for it without cheese.
51
00:02:13,916 --> 00:02:16,484
I would never forget to
ask that!
52
00:02:16,527 --> 00:02:18,486
It was the first thing I said!
53
00:02:18,529 --> 00:02:21,402
Look sir, I don't want
to call you a liar,
54
00:02:21,445 --> 00:02:24,535
but I have a perfect record
of customer service.
55
00:02:24,579 --> 00:02:26,102
No mistakes.
56
00:02:26,146 --> 00:02:28,887
Jeremiah Burger, founder,
president, chairman, and CEO of
57
00:02:28,931 --> 00:02:31,847
Jeremiah Burger Foods Limited,
once personally commended
58
00:02:31,890 --> 00:02:33,718
my unblemished track record.
59
00:02:33,762 --> 00:02:38,288
I don't care if you sprang fully
formed from the head of Zeus,
60
00:02:38,332 --> 00:02:40,116
you messed up!
61
00:02:40,160 --> 00:02:44,729
Either give me what I paid for
or give me my money back.
62
00:02:44,773 --> 00:02:46,818
Well, neither of those things
are going to happen.
63
00:02:46,862 --> 00:02:48,168
Mac? Carl?
64
00:02:48,211 --> 00:02:50,909
Please escort this gentleman
off the premises.
65
00:02:50,953 --> 00:02:54,478
This is an outrage!
I demand satisfaction!
66
00:02:54,522 --> 00:02:56,219
I'm really sorry, sir.
67
00:02:56,263 --> 00:02:57,394
Don't apologize to him.
68
00:02:57,438 --> 00:02:58,526
Sorry sir.
69
00:02:58,569 --> 00:03:01,137
I'll get you for this!
70
00:03:01,181 --> 00:03:06,708
I will have my cheeseless burger
and you will be blemished, sir!
71
00:03:06,751 --> 00:03:09,580
Blemished, I say!
72
00:03:09,624 --> 00:03:10,712
How'd it go?
73
00:03:12,366 --> 00:03:17,022
Burgerphile!!!!!
74
00:03:22,158 --> 00:03:24,552
Take my money
and try to poison me?
75
00:03:24,595 --> 00:03:26,510
Actually, they took my money.
76
00:03:26,554 --> 00:03:28,338
So get mad already!
77
00:03:28,382 --> 00:03:29,209
Think.
78
00:03:29,252 --> 00:03:30,514
How can we
make this right?
79
00:03:30,558 --> 00:03:31,994
Grease fire?
80
00:03:32,037 --> 00:03:34,083
Well, you don't want to destroy
the restaurant, do you?
81
00:03:34,126 --> 00:03:35,302
Don't I?
82
00:03:35,345 --> 00:03:36,738
You don't.
83
00:03:36,781 --> 00:03:38,870
This place is, like, seventy
percent of your diet.
84
00:03:38,914 --> 00:03:41,960
If you burn it down you'll
probably starve to death.
85
00:03:42,004 --> 00:03:44,702
Hmmm... I've got it!
86
00:03:44,746 --> 00:03:49,272
I'll need a shovel, a coffin,
an air tube and a strong back.
87
00:03:49,316 --> 00:03:50,404
Yours'll do.
88
00:03:50,447 --> 00:03:53,145
We're not burying anyone alive.
89
00:03:53,189 --> 00:03:55,496
But the air tube...
90
00:03:55,539 --> 00:03:57,541
Wait, it's just one guy?
91
00:03:57,585 --> 00:04:01,502
Yeah, some megalomaniacal
manager with tunnel vision.
92
00:04:01,545 --> 00:04:05,201
He's so concerned with having a
perfect service record that he
93
00:04:05,245 --> 00:04:07,203
won't let anything get in his
way.
94
00:04:07,247 --> 00:04:08,726
Even service.
95
00:04:08,770 --> 00:04:11,555
He wouldn't let
Hortence fix my order.
96
00:04:11,599 --> 00:04:12,600
Hortence?
97
00:04:12,643 --> 00:04:15,298
Oh you mean your girlfriend?
98
00:04:15,342 --> 00:04:17,387
She's not my girlfriend!
99
00:04:17,431 --> 00:04:18,736
Not with that attitude.
100
00:04:18,780 --> 00:04:20,085
You're no help.
101
00:04:20,129 --> 00:04:23,567
Looks like I have to do
this myself. As usual.
102
00:04:23,611 --> 00:04:24,438
Have fun!
103
00:04:26,962 --> 00:04:28,790
Mac? Carl?
104
00:04:28,833 --> 00:04:29,834
They're on break.
105
00:04:29,878 --> 00:04:31,619
Sir, this is your last chance.
106
00:04:31,662 --> 00:04:33,838
I demand satisfaction!
107
00:04:33,882 --> 00:04:35,753
Nope.
108
00:04:35,797 --> 00:04:39,801
I challenge you to a duel, sir.
109
00:04:39,844 --> 00:04:42,760
A duel? Wow.
110
00:04:42,804 --> 00:04:44,284
That was assault.
111
00:04:44,327 --> 00:04:45,067
I'm calling the police.
112
00:04:45,110 --> 00:04:47,112
Hortence! Call the police!
113
00:04:47,156 --> 00:04:48,200
Um...
114
00:04:48,244 --> 00:04:49,767
Yes Hortence.
Do call the police.
115
00:04:49,811 --> 00:04:52,248
Surely they'll side with me.
116
00:04:52,292 --> 00:04:53,641
Just leave.
117
00:04:53,684 --> 00:04:56,470
You are not welcome here.
You're bad for business.
118
00:04:56,513 --> 00:04:59,603
Oh, I'm bad for business,
am I?
119
00:04:59,647 --> 00:05:02,693
Yes. And as the sign
clearly states-
120
00:05:02,737 --> 00:05:05,479
I reserve the right to
refuse service to anyone
121
00:05:05,522 --> 00:05:06,610
for any reason.
122
00:05:06,654 --> 00:05:09,874
And my reason is,
I don't like you.
123
00:05:09,918 --> 00:05:11,702
I see your game.
124
00:05:11,746 --> 00:05:13,008
This isn't over!
125
00:05:13,051 --> 00:05:14,705
Wow.
126
00:05:14,749 --> 00:05:16,228
Chris! Get in the car!
127
00:05:21,190 --> 00:05:23,018
Good afternoon, sir.
128
00:05:23,061 --> 00:05:26,848
Show me to your heaviest,
most indestructible chain.
129
00:05:26,891 --> 00:05:29,067
What do you need to chain up?
130
00:05:29,111 --> 00:05:29,981
Me.
131
00:05:30,025 --> 00:05:33,202
Oooh...
for a magic trick?
132
00:05:33,245 --> 00:05:34,595
Don't make this weird.
133
00:05:37,380 --> 00:05:39,077
Here we are.
134
00:05:39,121 --> 00:05:41,166
This is "The Executive."
135
00:05:41,210 --> 00:05:44,387
Almost unbreakable.
136
00:05:44,431 --> 00:05:46,041
Say when.
137
00:05:46,084 --> 00:05:47,869
I think that's enough.
138
00:05:47,912 --> 00:05:50,262
Not yet!
139
00:05:50,306 --> 00:05:51,829
When.
140
00:05:51,873 --> 00:05:54,179
Say, for an extra ten dollars
I could have my nephew
141
00:05:54,223 --> 00:05:55,442
carry it for you.
142
00:05:55,485 --> 00:05:57,052
It's very heavy.
143
00:05:57,095 --> 00:05:58,836
That's okay, I have a Chris.
144
00:05:58,880 --> 00:05:59,489
Hey.
145
00:06:09,499 --> 00:06:12,197
Oh, hi. I'm super sorry,
146
00:06:12,241 --> 00:06:14,199
but I'm supposed to
refuse you service.
147
00:06:14,243 --> 00:06:15,766
That's fine, actually.
148
00:06:15,810 --> 00:06:17,246
I'm not here for service.
149
00:06:17,289 --> 00:06:19,248
I'd like to speak
with the manager.
150
00:06:19,291 --> 00:06:21,032
I'm actually supposed
to kick you out.
151
00:06:21,076 --> 00:06:24,688
I don't want to, but, you know, orders.
152
00:06:24,732 --> 00:06:26,864
Don't fret, this isn't on you.
153
00:06:26,908 --> 00:06:29,824
Chris! Enshackle me!
154
00:06:29,867 --> 00:06:31,608
Enshackle is not a word.
155
00:06:31,652 --> 00:06:34,219
Oh, I'm sorry,
Officer Dictionary.
156
00:06:34,263 --> 00:06:37,397
Just do it!
157
00:06:37,440 --> 00:06:39,616
Uh, Jeff?
158
00:06:39,660 --> 00:06:40,617
What is it, Hortence?
159
00:06:40,661 --> 00:06:41,923
I'm organizing cheese.
160
00:06:41,966 --> 00:06:43,403
What do you think
you're doing?!
161
00:06:43,446 --> 00:06:47,102
All I wanted was what I
ordered or a refund.
162
00:06:47,145 --> 00:06:48,669
You denied me both.
163
00:06:48,712 --> 00:06:51,715
You can call as many
goons as you like, but
164
00:06:51,759 --> 00:06:54,152
these chains are unbreakable.
165
00:06:54,196 --> 00:06:57,634
Sic semper tyrannis!
166
00:06:57,678 --> 00:07:01,203
Wow. He speaks French...
167
00:07:01,246 --> 00:07:03,161
I am calling the police!
168
00:07:03,205 --> 00:07:05,163
Call whomever you like.
169
00:07:05,207 --> 00:07:08,558
I shan't surrender until I get
what I ordered and you admit
170
00:07:08,602 --> 00:07:11,213
that a mistake was made.
171
00:07:11,256 --> 00:07:11,953
Never!
172
00:07:11,996 --> 00:07:13,911
Well, then, here we are.
173
00:07:18,307 --> 00:07:19,439
Be careful.
174
00:07:19,482 --> 00:07:22,050
They hate getting
your order right.
175
00:07:22,093 --> 00:07:23,878
Those are nice shoes.
176
00:07:23,921 --> 00:07:29,057
Did you know the fries
here give you scabies?
177
00:07:29,100 --> 00:07:29,971
Told you.
178
00:07:30,014 --> 00:07:31,015
Hi, Dan.
179
00:07:31,059 --> 00:07:32,408
What's new?
180
00:07:32,452 --> 00:07:34,628
Did you know the chicken
here is made entirely out
181
00:07:34,671 --> 00:07:37,326
of the cutest otters
they can find?
182
00:07:37,369 --> 00:07:38,109
It is?
183
00:07:38,153 --> 00:07:39,415
Of course not.
184
00:07:39,459 --> 00:07:41,635
It's mostly soy product
and recycled newspaper.
185
00:07:41,678 --> 00:07:42,897
I thought it was just chicken.
186
00:07:42,940 --> 00:07:45,508
You're so trusting.
187
00:07:45,552 --> 00:07:47,031
Dan, why don't you go home?
188
00:07:47,075 --> 00:07:49,120
This is bound to end poorly.
189
00:07:49,164 --> 00:07:50,557
You should really
listen to the lady.
190
00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:52,384
The police are on their way.
191
00:07:52,428 --> 00:07:54,909
Oooh, the police.
192
00:07:54,952 --> 00:07:56,214
I'm so scared.
193
00:07:56,258 --> 00:08:00,088
What are they going to
do, lock me in chains?
194
00:08:00,131 --> 00:08:03,178
Listen, why don't you just
let me buy you a burger?
195
00:08:03,221 --> 00:08:05,963
Oh. That's - thank you.
196
00:08:06,007 --> 00:08:08,531
But this is about more
than a single burger,
197
00:08:08,575 --> 00:08:10,054
sweet counter maid.
198
00:08:10,098 --> 00:08:12,143
Just let her buy you a
burger.
199
00:08:12,187 --> 00:08:13,797
Heck, I'll buy you a burger.
200
00:08:13,841 --> 00:08:16,147
It's a principle thing, Elise.
201
00:08:16,191 --> 00:08:18,715
I thought you of all people
would understand that.
202
00:08:18,759 --> 00:08:19,716
...Really?
203
00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:20,935
I understand.
204
00:08:20,978 --> 00:08:22,850
But as an employee
of Burgerphile,
205
00:08:22,893 --> 00:08:24,982
I can't officially
take your side.
206
00:08:25,026 --> 00:08:26,854
Even if I want to.
207
00:08:26,897 --> 00:08:32,512
Burger nymph, in thy orisons,
be all my sins remember'd.
208
00:08:32,555 --> 00:08:34,122
You talk funny.
209
00:08:34,165 --> 00:08:34,949
That's him officers!
210
00:08:34,992 --> 00:08:35,993
Arrest him!
211
00:08:36,037 --> 00:08:37,299
Who?
212
00:08:37,342 --> 00:08:39,040
The goofy looking fella
with the pretty lady?
213
00:08:39,083 --> 00:08:40,171
Goofy looking?
214
00:08:40,215 --> 00:08:41,825
She must be his nurse
or something.
215
00:08:41,869 --> 00:08:42,739
Hey!
216
00:08:42,783 --> 00:08:43,697
No!
217
00:08:43,740 --> 00:08:45,394
The guy chained
to the counter!
218
00:08:45,437 --> 00:08:46,351
Oh.
219
00:08:46,395 --> 00:08:47,614
Didn't even notice him there.
220
00:08:47,657 --> 00:08:48,963
Me neither.
221
00:08:49,006 --> 00:08:50,399
He looks so natural I just
assumed he was part
222
00:08:50,442 --> 00:08:51,400
of the decor.
223
00:08:51,443 --> 00:08:52,575
Well he's not.
224
00:08:52,619 --> 00:08:55,099
He's trespassing and
hurting business.
225
00:08:55,143 --> 00:08:57,058
The only thing hurting
your business is
226
00:08:57,101 --> 00:09:00,627
poor customer service!
227
00:09:00,670 --> 00:09:03,020
Alright sir, let's go.
228
00:09:03,064 --> 00:09:04,848
Mmm, nah.
229
00:09:04,892 --> 00:09:05,980
Please?
230
00:09:06,023 --> 00:09:07,634
No thanks.
231
00:09:07,677 --> 00:09:10,158
Sorry sir, there's not
a whole lot we can do.
232
00:09:10,201 --> 00:09:10,854
What?!
233
00:09:10,898 --> 00:09:12,203
We asked him nicely.
234
00:09:12,247 --> 00:09:13,378
Well arrest him!
235
00:09:13,422 --> 00:09:14,858
He's trespassing!
236
00:09:14,902 --> 00:09:17,339
He's loitering, disturbing
the customers and - look!
237
00:09:17,382 --> 00:09:20,864
He's not even wearing shoes!
238
00:09:20,908 --> 00:09:23,475
My feet get hot.
239
00:09:23,519 --> 00:09:26,217
See!? No shoes no service!
240
00:09:26,261 --> 00:09:27,610
So don't serve him.
241
00:09:27,654 --> 00:09:29,307
All available officers to
the Montessori school,
242
00:09:29,351 --> 00:09:30,874
multiple 783s-
243
00:09:30,918 --> 00:09:32,136
783?
244
00:09:32,180 --> 00:09:33,790
Isn't that a werewolf attack?
245
00:09:33,834 --> 00:09:35,705
We've got to go.
246
00:09:35,749 --> 00:09:36,619
But-but--
247
00:09:36,663 --> 00:09:40,188
Support the Policemen's Ball.
248
00:09:40,231 --> 00:09:42,103
You can't keep this up
forever.
249
00:09:42,146 --> 00:09:43,626
Eventually you'll get hungry.
250
00:09:43,670 --> 00:09:47,021
Eventually you'll go
bald, what's your point?
251
00:09:47,064 --> 00:09:49,371
No one is to feed this man!
252
00:09:49,414 --> 00:09:52,026
Any customer caught offering
him food will be banned
253
00:09:52,069 --> 00:09:53,331
from the restaurant.
254
00:09:53,375 --> 00:09:56,421
Any employee who offers
him food will be fired.
255
00:09:56,465 --> 00:09:57,814
FIRED!
256
00:09:57,858 --> 00:10:00,251
Do you know how long it
takes to starve to death?
257
00:10:00,295 --> 00:10:02,863
Or the effect that having a
chained up corpse at your
258
00:10:02,906 --> 00:10:04,386
counter will have on business?
259
00:10:04,429 --> 00:10:06,388
You'll give up before you die.
260
00:10:06,431 --> 00:10:09,826
You clearly don't know
who your messing with.
261
00:10:09,870 --> 00:10:12,263
Awww, he's so principled.
262
00:10:12,307 --> 00:10:15,789
I can't keep doing nothing...
263
00:10:15,832 --> 00:10:17,704
Hello? Channel 32?
264
00:10:20,881 --> 00:10:21,403
How do I look?
265
00:10:21,446 --> 00:10:22,491
Good, as usual?
266
00:10:22,534 --> 00:10:23,666
All right - make
sure my hair is on.
267
00:10:26,147 --> 00:10:29,237
and that's why ketchup is
better for you than broccoli.
268
00:10:29,280 --> 00:10:31,108
We're here inside
the Burgerphile
269
00:10:31,152 --> 00:10:33,720
where a man has chained
himself to the counter.
270
00:10:33,763 --> 00:10:34,329
Wait!
271
00:10:34,372 --> 00:10:34,895
Hold on.
272
00:10:34,938 --> 00:10:35,852
Don't film him!
273
00:10:35,896 --> 00:10:37,288
Why not?
274
00:10:39,290 --> 00:10:40,683
If this gets back to
corporate,
275
00:10:40,727 --> 00:10:43,512
They'll put me on the first
train back to Maryland.
276
00:10:43,555 --> 00:10:45,122
Ouch. Not Maryland.
277
00:10:45,166 --> 00:10:47,908
There's a very simple solution
to this, Jeff.
278
00:10:47,951 --> 00:10:50,693
Admit you made a mistake
or give me a refund,
279
00:10:50,737 --> 00:10:52,216
and I'll be on my way.
280
00:10:52,260 --> 00:10:54,262
Now what do you have to say to
that, sir?
281
00:10:58,309 --> 00:11:00,094
No deal.
282
00:11:00,137 --> 00:11:01,704
Well there you have it, folks.
283
00:11:01,748 --> 00:11:05,447
Yet another story of one man's
struggle against a heartless
284
00:11:05,490 --> 00:11:07,275
corporate entity.
285
00:11:07,318 --> 00:11:08,972
Are we out?
286
00:11:09,016 --> 00:11:09,538
Thanks guys.
287
00:11:09,581 --> 00:11:11,105
That's great TV.
288
00:11:11,148 --> 00:11:12,715
Get out of my restaurant!
289
00:11:12,759 --> 00:11:13,368
Nope.
290
00:11:17,154 --> 00:11:19,983
You're really brave, standing
up for your beliefs.
291
00:11:20,027 --> 00:11:21,463
It's why I called the media.
292
00:11:21,506 --> 00:11:25,641
You did that? For me?
293
00:11:25,685 --> 00:11:27,208
Hortence?
294
00:11:27,251 --> 00:11:28,949
Don't fraternize with the enemy
while you're on the clock.
295
00:11:28,992 --> 00:11:31,342
Aww, guess I have to
get back to work.
296
00:11:31,386 --> 00:11:33,562
Oh. Okay.
297
00:11:33,605 --> 00:11:39,002
Keep fighting.
I believe in you.
298
00:11:39,046 --> 00:11:41,265
Oh, no! Dude!
299
00:11:41,309 --> 00:11:43,746
You're the dude, Dude!
300
00:11:43,790 --> 00:11:45,182
What now?!
301
00:11:45,226 --> 00:11:47,532
Hippies.
302
00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:52,668
Uh - I should really get back
to my station, Mac and Carl's
303
00:11:52,712 --> 00:11:55,018
fingers are too thick to work
the register.
304
00:11:55,062 --> 00:11:58,848
I um needed to talk to you,
about that guy in there.
305
00:11:58,892 --> 00:11:59,588
Dan?
306
00:11:59,631 --> 00:12:01,372
Whatever his name is.
307
00:12:01,416 --> 00:12:03,810
He likes you, you know.
308
00:12:03,853 --> 00:12:06,508
Really? You think?
309
00:12:06,551 --> 00:12:08,162
Of course.
310
00:12:08,205 --> 00:12:12,209
So what I need you to do
is use that to manipulate
311
00:12:12,253 --> 00:12:13,907
him into leaving.
312
00:12:13,950 --> 00:12:16,910
What? I don't think
I can do that, sir.
313
00:12:16,953 --> 00:12:18,520
It's wrong.
314
00:12:18,563 --> 00:12:21,915
Hortence, Hortence, Hortence,
you want to become assistant
315
00:12:21,958 --> 00:12:24,178
manager someday, don't you?
316
00:12:24,221 --> 00:12:25,396
Of course!
317
00:12:25,440 --> 00:12:27,572
It's like practically
all I think about.
318
00:12:27,616 --> 00:12:29,487
I can make that happen for you.
319
00:12:29,531 --> 00:12:32,403
All you have to do is convince
your little friend to give up
320
00:12:32,447 --> 00:12:34,884
his protest and go home.
321
00:12:34,928 --> 00:12:36,756
I get you.
322
00:12:44,241 --> 00:12:45,852
What was that all about?
323
00:12:45,895 --> 00:12:50,030
He thinks you'll give up your
protest if I go out with you.
324
00:12:50,073 --> 00:12:51,771
I said you wouldn't.
325
00:12:51,814 --> 00:12:54,164
Oh. Right.
326
00:12:54,208 --> 00:12:59,691
I could not love thee, dear, so
much, loved I not honor more.
327
00:12:59,735 --> 00:13:01,824
I have no idea what
you just said,
328
00:13:01,868 --> 00:13:05,349
but now I totally get
what I have to do.
329
00:13:08,048 --> 00:13:10,790
My title is Customer
Service Representative!
330
00:13:10,833 --> 00:13:13,314
I can't let this
injustice continue!
331
00:13:13,357 --> 00:13:14,968
I'm on strike!
332
00:13:15,011 --> 00:13:16,317
Sweet!
333
00:13:16,360 --> 00:13:19,189
Get in my chains!
334
00:13:19,233 --> 00:13:21,496
No! No no no!
335
00:13:21,539 --> 00:13:22,889
This is really bad.
336
00:13:22,932 --> 00:13:24,151
I won't go back to Maryland,.
337
00:13:24,194 --> 00:13:27,415
I won't! ...I still
have the nightmares...
338
00:13:30,679 --> 00:13:32,376
Say no to pickle burgers!
339
00:13:32,420 --> 00:13:33,638
You sing it sister!
340
00:13:33,682 --> 00:13:35,727
Pickles are gross!
341
00:13:35,771 --> 00:13:38,382
Hey guys! Over here!
342
00:13:38,426 --> 00:13:42,256
Wow Dan, you've really
started, uh, something.
343
00:13:42,299 --> 00:13:45,433
Yeah, I think they're
about to cave.
344
00:13:45,476 --> 00:13:47,565
They're so busy
fielding complaints,
345
00:13:47,609 --> 00:13:49,654
they're not even serving food.
346
00:13:49,698 --> 00:13:50,699
Oh.
347
00:13:50,742 --> 00:13:52,614
We were going to grab dinner.
348
00:13:52,657 --> 00:13:55,095
Oh, don't worry, we can
just go across the street.
349
00:13:55,138 --> 00:13:58,141
I see you've made a new
friend, Dan.
350
00:13:58,185 --> 00:13:59,926
I'm Hortence...
351
00:13:59,969 --> 00:14:03,190
Dan's girlfriend.
352
00:14:03,233 --> 00:14:08,064
Wow Dan, way to go.
353
00:14:08,108 --> 00:14:10,066
Why are you so surprised?
354
00:14:10,110 --> 00:14:12,852
The ladies love me.
355
00:14:12,895 --> 00:14:14,810
What? They do.
356
00:14:14,854 --> 00:14:17,813
Ladies and gentlemen, while
admitting no wrongdoing on
357
00:14:17,857 --> 00:14:20,076
the parts of Burgerphile,
wholly owned subsidary
358
00:14:20,120 --> 00:14:22,905
of Jeremiah Burger Foods Limited
International Incorporated, a
359
00:14:22,949 --> 00:14:25,734
division of Drax Chemical
and Munitions Corporation,
360
00:14:25,777 --> 00:14:30,086
we realize some of our customers
are not completely satisfied.
361
00:14:30,130 --> 00:14:33,046
So please, enjoy the
table of complimentary
362
00:14:33,089 --> 00:14:38,834
cheeseburgers outside.
363
00:14:38,878 --> 00:14:39,574
Hey!
364
00:14:39,617 --> 00:14:41,837
There's no table of---
365
00:14:45,928 --> 00:14:47,190
Checkmate.
366
00:14:47,234 --> 00:14:49,714
Please, every revolution
has a few weak links.?
367
00:14:49,758 --> 00:14:51,760
But these won't break.
368
00:14:51,803 --> 00:14:52,979
Nor will I.
369
00:14:53,022 --> 00:14:56,417
We'll see about that.
370
00:14:56,460 --> 00:15:01,030
Ah! Ahhhh-hah! Ahhhhh!
371
00:15:01,074 --> 00:15:02,597
Stop it, Jeff!
372
00:15:02,640 --> 00:15:03,903
He's had enough!
373
00:15:03,946 --> 00:15:05,600
I'll say when he's had enough!
374
00:15:05,643 --> 00:15:11,736
Retract your complaint!
375
00:15:11,780 --> 00:15:13,738
Never...
376
00:15:13,782 --> 00:15:15,871
Jeff!?
377
00:15:15,915 --> 00:15:17,699
What is the meaning of this?!
378
00:15:17,742 --> 00:15:19,919
And why is there an angry
mob outside demanding
379
00:15:19,962 --> 00:15:21,659
free cheeseburgers?
380
00:15:21,703 --> 00:15:22,443
Mr. Burger?!
381
00:15:22,486 --> 00:15:23,792
What are you doing here?
382
00:15:23,835 --> 00:15:25,228
What am I doing here?
383
00:15:25,272 --> 00:15:27,752
I'm watching the news while
having my midday burger
384
00:15:27,796 --> 00:15:29,972
and what do I see?
385
00:15:30,016 --> 00:15:32,105
I can explain!
386
00:15:32,148 --> 00:15:33,715
Let me!
387
00:15:33,758 --> 00:15:37,371
This wackadoo got my order wrong
and then refused to fix it.
388
00:15:37,414 --> 00:15:38,807
Plus he's been torturing me.
389
00:15:38,850 --> 00:15:41,070
Which is seriously uncool.
390
00:15:41,114 --> 00:15:43,943
What do you have to say
for yourself, Jeff?
391
00:15:43,986 --> 00:15:48,773
He obviously just
ordered wrong.
392
00:15:48,817 --> 00:15:50,340
I meant about the torture thing.
393
00:15:50,384 --> 00:15:53,169
Oh. That. Well, yeah.
394
00:15:53,213 --> 00:15:55,737
But I swear he ordered
his burger with cheese.
395
00:15:55,780 --> 00:15:59,306
I said no cheese!
396
00:15:59,349 --> 00:16:00,872
I've heard enough!
397
00:16:00,916 --> 00:16:05,834
Jeff, you've forgotten the first
rule of customer service.
398
00:16:05,877 --> 00:16:09,011
Um, don't let them
go for your eyes?
399
00:16:09,055 --> 00:16:14,408
The customer is always
right!
400
00:16:19,935 --> 00:16:23,199
But my perfect record!
401
00:16:23,243 --> 00:16:27,987
I'm sorry Jeff.
402
00:16:28,030 --> 00:16:33,688
NOOO!!!!
403
00:16:43,872 --> 00:16:46,483
Oh no! What have I done?
404
00:16:46,527 --> 00:16:47,963
I think I've killed
him.
405
00:16:48,007 --> 00:16:49,182
Probably.
406
00:16:49,225 --> 00:16:51,010
But let's not forget
why we're all here:
407
00:16:51,053 --> 00:16:53,273
you got my order wrong.
408
00:16:53,316 --> 00:16:54,752
You don't get it.
409
00:16:54,796 --> 00:16:57,842
I have no family, no
friends...
410
00:16:57,886 --> 00:17:01,585
My perfect record
is all I have!
411
00:17:01,629 --> 00:17:05,024
Wow. You just made me
really sad right now.
412
00:17:05,067 --> 00:17:06,808
Come on, Mr. Burger.
413
00:17:06,851 --> 00:17:09,941
Wake up! Please, wake up.
414
00:17:09,985 --> 00:17:12,988
You're the closest thing
I have to a father.?
415
00:17:13,032 --> 00:17:15,425
Hey, does anybody else
smell smoke?
416
00:17:15,469 --> 00:17:17,079
And hot grease?
417
00:17:17,123 --> 00:17:20,256
Boy, I sure hope those two
don't-
418
00:17:20,300 --> 00:17:22,041
Oh no!
419
00:17:22,084 --> 00:17:26,001
Burgerphile, No!
420
00:17:30,701 --> 00:17:32,921
Burgerphile! I'll save you!
421
00:17:32,964 --> 00:17:34,009
You do care about this place?
422
00:17:34,053 --> 00:17:35,837
Of course I do.
423
00:17:35,880 --> 00:17:39,667
I've always cared.
424
00:17:39,710 --> 00:17:42,757
You two aren't so very
different after all.
425
00:17:42,800 --> 00:17:44,715
Major twist, bro!
426
00:17:44,759 --> 00:17:46,369
Shut up. Shut up.
427
00:17:46,413 --> 00:17:47,327
Okay. Quick.
428
00:17:47,370 --> 00:17:48,545
Get the flames on the
window.
429
00:17:48,589 --> 00:17:50,025
This window?
430
00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:54,899
Yes! The one on fire!
431
00:17:54,943 --> 00:18:01,384
Now you know how it feels when
someone gets your order wrong.?
432
00:18:05,301 --> 00:18:09,088
Ahhhhhh! Ahhhhhh!
433
00:18:16,182 --> 00:18:19,968
Take that you life ruiner!
434
00:18:22,884 --> 00:18:26,540
CONDIMENTS!
435
00:18:26,583 --> 00:18:30,718
My eyes! My beautiful eyes!
436
00:18:37,986 --> 00:18:43,905
Dan! Heads up!
437
00:18:43,948 --> 00:18:46,603
Say goodbye, walking sticks!
438
00:18:46,647 --> 00:18:47,343
No!
439
00:18:47,387 --> 00:18:48,344
I need them for walking.
440
00:18:48,388 --> 00:18:50,999
Dan! The fire!
441
00:18:53,697 --> 00:18:55,264
What the--help me up!
442
00:18:55,308 --> 00:18:57,048
I can reset the
sprinkler system.
443
00:18:57,092 --> 00:18:58,398
You know you're supposed
444
00:18:58,441 --> 00:19:00,139
to check those every
three months, Jeff.
445
00:19:00,182 --> 00:19:02,619
Yeah, and we're supposed to
toss the burgers when they get
446
00:19:02,663 --> 00:19:05,753
that rancid rainbow, but here
on the front lines, we have to
447
00:19:05,796 --> 00:19:09,017
make do with what we've got.
448
00:19:17,068 --> 00:19:19,941
My hero!
449
00:19:19,984 --> 00:19:21,160
Now for you, Jeff.
450
00:19:21,203 --> 00:19:22,509
Sir, please.
451
00:19:22,552 --> 00:19:25,120
I know this got a teensy bit
out of control...
452
00:19:25,164 --> 00:19:26,382
Teensy?
453
00:19:26,426 --> 00:19:28,123
You forgot the most
important thing, Jeff.
454
00:19:28,167 --> 00:19:30,473
Customer service is about the
customer.
455
00:19:30,517 --> 00:19:32,954
Also, you nearly killed
me, which is irksome.
456
00:19:32,997 --> 00:19:34,999
There's only one
thing left for you.
457
00:19:35,043 --> 00:19:36,479
Mac? Carl?
458
00:19:36,523 --> 00:19:39,221
Anything but Maryland!
Anything!
459
00:19:39,265 --> 00:19:40,570
Send me to jail!
460
00:19:40,614 --> 00:19:43,965
Just don't make me go back
to that awful place!
461
00:19:44,008 --> 00:19:45,488
Goodbye, Jeff.
462
00:19:45,532 --> 00:19:47,011
I don't know about you guys,
463
00:19:47,055 --> 00:19:48,230
but I could really use a
burger right about now.
464
00:19:48,274 --> 00:19:51,233
How do you take yours?
465
00:19:51,277 --> 00:19:53,192
Naked.
466
00:19:53,235 --> 00:19:57,196
A man after my own heart.
467
00:19:58,806 --> 00:19:59,850
Where've you guys been?
468
00:19:59,894 --> 00:20:01,243
We had dinner
across the street.
469
00:20:01,287 --> 00:20:03,941
It was amazing!
470
00:20:03,985 --> 00:20:09,512
So much better than
Burger- I mean... sorry.
471
00:20:09,556 --> 00:20:13,299
Hortence, your selfless
actions have set an example
472
00:20:13,342 --> 00:20:17,520
for customer service
persons everywhere.
473
00:20:17,564 --> 00:20:20,436
Thank you, sir.
474
00:20:20,480 --> 00:20:24,223
By the power vested in
me, I hereby pronounce
475
00:20:24,266 --> 00:20:28,183
you regional manager.
476
00:20:28,227 --> 00:20:30,229
Oh thank you sir!
477
00:20:30,272 --> 00:20:32,535
Do me proud, Hortence.
478
00:20:32,579 --> 00:20:33,667
Congratulations!
479
00:20:33,710 --> 00:20:37,018
This is so great for you!
480
00:20:37,061 --> 00:20:38,759
It is.
481
00:20:38,802 --> 00:20:40,456
But it's not good
for us.
482
00:20:40,500 --> 00:20:42,023
What do you mean?
483
00:20:42,066 --> 00:20:44,025
I'll have to move.
484
00:20:44,068 --> 00:20:45,287
That's true.
485
00:20:45,331 --> 00:20:47,376
To our regional headquarters
in Santa Monica.
486
00:20:47,420 --> 00:20:50,161
Maybe I won't go.
487
00:20:50,205 --> 00:20:51,337
You have to go.
488
00:20:51,380 --> 00:20:54,209
I can't let you give up on your
dreams.
489
00:20:54,253 --> 00:20:56,907
Not after everything
you've done for me.
490
00:20:56,951 --> 00:21:00,084
I can't have you regret me.
491
00:21:00,128 --> 00:21:04,611
Aww....I would
never regret you.
492
00:21:04,654 --> 00:21:06,221
Time to go, Hortence.
493
00:21:06,265 --> 00:21:09,877
Let's take the corporate
helicopter to your new life.
494
00:21:09,920 --> 00:21:10,791
How do you like your burger?
495
00:21:10,834 --> 00:21:14,142
I'll always LIKE you, like you.
496
00:21:14,185 --> 00:21:15,709
We'll always have heavy chains.
497
00:21:19,930 --> 00:21:22,237
I can't believe
she's gone forever.
498
00:21:22,281 --> 00:21:25,284
You know, Dan, Santa Monica's
only 20 miles away.
499
00:21:25,327 --> 00:21:26,981
It's just a straight
shot down the highway.
500
00:21:27,024 --> 00:21:29,070
You could be there
in half an hour.
501
00:21:29,113 --> 00:21:31,681
Gone forever.
502
00:21:31,725 --> 00:21:33,292
Oh - brother?
503
00:21:33,335 --> 00:21:35,076
Protest buddy?
504
00:21:35,119 --> 00:21:37,121
Little help with these chains?
505
00:21:37,165 --> 00:21:38,340
Please?
506
00:21:38,384 --> 00:21:40,342
Just ignore him.
33833
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