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♪ Who put the "glad" in gladiator? ♪
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♪ Hercules ♪
3
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♪ Whose daring deeds are great theater? ♪
4
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♪ Hercules ♪
5
00:00:16,417 --> 00:00:18,417
-♪ Is he bold? ♪-♪ No one braver ♪
6
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-♪ Is he sweet? ♪-♪ Our favorite flavor, Hercules ♪
7
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-♪ What a guy ♪-♪ Hercules ♪
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-♪ Ask his friends ♪
-♪ Hercules ♪
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♪ Honey, they won't lie ♪
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-♪ Hercules ♪-♪ Ahh, Hercules ♪
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♪ Hercules ♪
12
00:00:30,583 --> 00:00:31,959
♪ Hercules ♪
13
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-♪ Come on ♪-♪ No one's fool ♪
14
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♪ Now, the boy's in school ♪
15
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♪ He's in trainin' ♪
16
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♪ Smart and shy ♪
17
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♪ And the nicest guy ♪
18
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♪ No complainin' ♪
19
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♪ He was a no one, a zero, zero ♪
20
00:00:42,917 --> 00:00:44,792
♪ He'll never quit till he's a hero ♪
21
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♪ He's the most likely to succeed ♪
22
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♪ From zero to hero ♪
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♪ Herc is a hero ♪
24
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♪ He'll be a hero ♪
25
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Wait and see.
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[Bob reading]
27
00:01:06,375 --> 00:01:07,959
[Bob] The mighty Hercules.
28
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The legendary hero of heroes.
29
00:01:10,166 --> 00:01:13,333
Tested by dangers thatno mere mortal could brave.
30
00:01:13,417 --> 00:01:17,458
The thousand headed Hyburgh.The fearsome Nemian Lion.
31
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And perhaps the greatestchallenge of all--
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[Calliope] High school!
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[Bob] E-e-excuse me.
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High school, honey.
That's the tough stuff.
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[Bob] Well, that's not on my list.
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Darling, we are the muses.
37
00:01:33,125 --> 00:01:36,166
We know what it was and what it is!
38
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And we got the dish on how Hercules
hit the big time.
39
00:01:39,583 --> 00:01:40,917
You tell 'em, girl.
40
00:01:41,000 --> 00:01:43,834
[Bob] If I couldget back to my narration.
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Take five.
42
00:01:45,542 --> 00:01:48,250
We feel... inspired.
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00:01:52,542 --> 00:01:53,959
♪ Now young Herc ♪
44
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♪ As a teen ♪
45
00:01:55,417 --> 00:01:57,792
♪ Was a lot like the rest ♪
46
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♪ With a heroic dream ♪
47
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♪ And no hair on his chest ♪
48
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[giggles]
49
00:02:04,291 --> 00:02:06,667
♪ He was working with Phil ♪
50
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♪ On his physical best ♪
51
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♪ When his dad intervened ♪
52
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♪ With this simple request ♪
53
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Child, what did he say?
54
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♪ You've got to send ♪
55
00:02:19,667 --> 00:02:20,583
♪ Send my boy ♪
56
00:02:20,667 --> 00:02:22,667
-♪ Send my boy ♪-♪ Send my boy ♪
57
00:02:22,750 --> 00:02:26,500
-♪ You've got to send ♪-♪ My boy to school ♪
58
00:02:26,583 --> 00:02:28,542
♪ Fill his hollow head ♪
59
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♪ With a fountain of knowledge ♪
60
00:02:30,750 --> 00:02:34,375
♪ Every mortal mind needs fuel ♪
61
00:02:34,458 --> 00:02:36,166
♪ He's got to learn the difference ♪
62
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♪ Between right and wrong ♪
63
00:02:38,417 --> 00:02:42,333
♪ And someday soon he'llNeed a date for the prom ♪
64
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♪ Don't want him growing up ♪
65
00:02:44,125 --> 00:02:46,083
♪ To be no fool ♪
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00:02:46,166 --> 00:02:51,875
♪ You've got to send my boy to school ♪
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00:02:57,667 --> 00:02:59,166
[groans]
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Unh! Hermes.
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Hermes, my paper. Now.
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Today's top story,
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00:03:07,750 --> 00:03:10,333
The fabulous Prometheus Academy welcomes
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the oh-so-happening Hercules.
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Really? Let me see.
74
00:03:14,750 --> 00:03:16,333
Ah, didn't make the Valley Edition.
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00:03:16,417 --> 00:03:17,750
But on Mount Olympus,
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all the Gods and Goddesses
77
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are like, heh, hyped, man, heh.
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00:03:21,917 --> 00:03:22,875
Ah, breakfast.
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Most important meal of the day.
80
00:03:29,208 --> 00:03:31,667
Ay-yi-i forgot the bananas.
81
00:03:35,709 --> 00:03:36,917
Thanks.
82
00:03:37,834 --> 00:03:38,792
Oy.
83
00:03:39,875 --> 00:03:41,667
Hey, you're not nervous, are you?
84
00:03:41,750 --> 00:03:44,333
No. Don't think so.
85
00:03:44,500 --> 00:03:45,667
Should I be?
86
00:03:45,750 --> 00:03:46,917
Nice work, wing tips.
87
00:03:47,000 --> 00:03:50,917
Kid, the first day of school is just
like any other.
88
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But what if nobody likes me?
89
00:03:52,291 --> 00:03:55,291
Oy. This is one of those peer pressure,
90
00:03:55,375 --> 00:03:56,792
teen angst crises.
91
00:03:56,875 --> 00:03:59,000
Herc, two words.
92
00:03:59,125 --> 00:04:00,875
Re-lax.
93
00:04:01,041 --> 00:04:02,625
By the way, did I mention
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00:04:02,709 --> 00:04:05,333
that the school barge was waiting
when I got here?
95
00:04:05,417 --> 00:04:07,166
[spits] No way!
96
00:04:07,250 --> 00:04:09,166
I can't be late for my first day.
97
00:04:11,542 --> 00:04:12,834
Wait up!
98
00:04:12,917 --> 00:04:14,750
[all] Huh?
99
00:04:14,834 --> 00:04:16,250
What?
100
00:04:21,207 --> 00:04:22,834
[muttering]
101
00:04:22,917 --> 00:04:24,709
Where's our new student?
102
00:04:25,582 --> 00:04:27,792
[coughing]
103
00:04:30,500 --> 00:04:33,041
I am Parenthesis, your guidance counselor.
104
00:04:33,166 --> 00:04:35,207
This is your student i.d.
105
00:04:35,291 --> 00:04:38,792
It signifies that you are a student
at Prometheus Academy,
106
00:04:38,875 --> 00:04:40,792
The most prestigious school in Greece.
107
00:04:40,875 --> 00:04:42,959
And it's 10 drachmas to replace if lost
or stolen.
108
00:04:43,041 --> 00:04:44,792
It won't leave my sight, sir.
109
00:04:44,875 --> 00:04:47,542
Here's your campus map, recently revised,
110
00:04:47,625 --> 00:04:49,625
cafeterium menu, I like the mutton,
111
00:04:49,709 --> 00:04:51,457
and your locker number,
memorize and destroy.
112
00:04:54,457 --> 00:04:57,250
X-I, X-I...
113
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Oh, X-I.
114
00:04:58,709 --> 00:05:00,333
No, not this one!
115
00:05:01,500 --> 00:05:05,875
This is Pandora's locker.
She's got some issues.
116
00:05:05,959 --> 00:05:07,333
No, get off, get off!
117
00:05:07,417 --> 00:05:09,125
Sorry, I'm new.
118
00:05:09,208 --> 00:05:11,417
OK, obvious. I'm Icarus.
119
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Hercules. Call me Herc.
120
00:05:13,625 --> 00:05:15,125
Herc, as a newbie,
121
00:05:15,208 --> 00:05:16,625
you need a guy that's plugged in.
122
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Someone who can put you at the epicenter
123
00:05:18,959 --> 00:05:21,125
of the Academy's chic Greek elite.
124
00:05:21,207 --> 00:05:23,125
Thanks. Th-that would be great.
125
00:05:23,207 --> 00:05:24,542
Yeah, wouldn't it?
126
00:05:24,625 --> 00:05:26,959
I'm not that guy.
127
00:05:28,917 --> 00:05:31,667
Honey, what's scarier than
giving Medusa a makeover?
128
00:05:31,750 --> 00:05:33,917
Girl, the first day in a new school.
129
00:05:34,000 --> 00:05:37,082
♪ Show him facts and figures ♪
130
00:05:37,166 --> 00:05:38,250
♪ Bring him books to read ♪
131
00:05:38,332 --> 00:05:40,875
♪ Give him all the toolsAnd learning skills ♪
132
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♪ He'll need to succeed ♪
133
00:05:42,417 --> 00:05:46,041
♪ As a shiny gene pool jewel ♪
134
00:05:46,125 --> 00:05:48,417
♪ You've got to send my boy ♪
135
00:05:48,500 --> 00:05:50,000
♪ He's my pride and joy ♪
136
00:05:50,082 --> 00:05:52,500
♪ You've got to send ♪
137
00:05:52,582 --> 00:05:54,417
♪ My boy ♪
138
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♪ To school ♪
139
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[cheering]
140
00:06:03,333 --> 00:06:06,125
Oh, I had no idea
high school would be so tough.
141
00:06:06,208 --> 00:06:09,375
Well, take heart, my new friend,
for it is lunch time,
142
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a respite from academic adversity.
143
00:06:15,875 --> 00:06:18,582
Welcome to the cafeterium.
144
00:06:18,667 --> 00:06:20,792
Bad food in large quantities.
145
00:06:20,875 --> 00:06:22,417
Goat milk?
146
00:06:22,500 --> 00:06:24,000
[neigh]
147
00:06:26,125 --> 00:06:27,082
[gasps]
148
00:06:29,166 --> 00:06:31,207
Sorry, Ajax. He's the new guy.
149
00:06:31,291 --> 00:06:34,582
Herc, try not to act like the new guy.
150
00:06:34,667 --> 00:06:36,500
You got it, Icarus.
151
00:06:38,750 --> 00:06:39,750
Good example.
152
00:06:39,834 --> 00:06:43,250
This is the kind of thing
that can get you labeled for life.
153
00:06:43,332 --> 00:06:45,834
Something like "cornu-dope-ia,"
154
00:06:45,917 --> 00:06:48,082
or... "herky jerky with
the fruity booties."
155
00:06:48,166 --> 00:06:49,250
OK, OK, I get the point.
156
00:06:49,332 --> 00:06:50,332
Well, I'm just saying,
157
00:06:50,417 --> 00:06:51,750
kids can be cruel.
158
00:06:51,834 --> 00:06:53,792
Thanks, Icky.
159
00:06:53,875 --> 00:06:54,834
Some more than others.
160
00:06:54,917 --> 00:06:55,917
He can't do that.
161
00:06:56,332 --> 00:06:58,375
There you go, acting new again.
162
00:06:58,457 --> 00:06:59,750
Why should we let him get away with that?
163
00:06:59,834 --> 00:07:01,333
Because he's Adonis.
164
00:07:01,375 --> 00:07:02,375
He's a prince.
165
00:07:03,375 --> 00:07:05,834
If you wanna survive high school,
you gotta know the score.
166
00:07:05,917 --> 00:07:07,750
-What's the score?
-We're losing!
167
00:07:07,834 --> 00:07:11,166
You and me... losers.
168
00:07:12,792 --> 00:07:13,917
[sighs]
169
00:07:14,208 --> 00:07:17,166
This is Cassandra.
170
00:07:17,625 --> 00:07:22,625
She is sweeter than ambrosia
and she is all mine.
171
00:07:22,709 --> 00:07:23,875
Icarus.
172
00:07:23,959 --> 00:07:25,041
Yeah, baby?
173
00:07:25,125 --> 00:07:26,000
The hands?
174
00:07:26,500 --> 00:07:28,750
Move them or lose them.
175
00:07:28,834 --> 00:07:31,582
Our relationship is in flux.
176
00:07:31,667 --> 00:07:33,917
Honey, I want you to meet Hercules.
177
00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:35,917
This is his first day here,
178
00:07:36,000 --> 00:07:38,834
so make him feel welcome while
I go back for firsts.
179
00:07:38,917 --> 00:07:40,917
Ha, nice to meet you, Cassandra.
180
00:07:42,959 --> 00:07:45,875
I doubt it, but it's polite
of you to say so.
181
00:07:45,959 --> 00:07:48,291
Icarus is a-- he's a great guy.
182
00:07:48,375 --> 00:07:50,417
I-i-is he your boyfriend?
183
00:07:50,500 --> 00:07:51,959
Try stalker.
184
00:07:52,041 --> 00:07:52,959
Stalker?
185
00:07:53,041 --> 00:07:54,792
He thinks he's my boyfriend.
186
00:07:54,875 --> 00:07:56,959
He flew too close to the sun.
187
00:07:57,041 --> 00:07:59,041
Oh, he's that Icarus?
188
00:07:59,125 --> 00:08:01,208
Huh. I wondered about his hair.
189
00:08:01,291 --> 00:08:03,375
[Cassandra]
It goes deeper. Like, to his brain.
190
00:08:03,458 --> 00:08:06,166
[Hercules]
Heh. Well, he's, uh, happy.
191
00:08:06,250 --> 00:08:07,458
Happy's good, right?
192
00:08:07,542 --> 00:08:08,625
It's not for everybody.
193
00:08:08,709 --> 00:08:11,542
On the other hand,
living in a deluded fantasy is probably
194
00:08:11,667 --> 00:08:13,959
the only way to survive
this Underworld on Earth.
195
00:08:14,041 --> 00:08:16,125
Yeah, heh. What?
196
00:08:16,207 --> 00:08:17,125
High school.
197
00:08:17,207 --> 00:08:18,542
Oh, oh, I got you.
198
00:08:18,625 --> 00:08:20,625
The Underworld thing was a metaphor.
199
00:08:20,709 --> 00:08:21,709
Right, right.
200
00:08:21,792 --> 00:08:23,792
We covered that
in epic poetry class today.
201
00:08:24,250 --> 00:08:26,457
Ah, I should know this stuff.
202
00:08:26,542 --> 00:08:28,582
Cassandra, are you OK?
203
00:08:28,750 --> 00:08:29,834
Whoa, did I miss it?
204
00:08:29,917 --> 00:08:32,375
-What?
-A Cassandra Vision.
205
00:08:32,500 --> 00:08:33,332
Watch.
206
00:08:33,457 --> 00:08:34,500
Vision?
207
00:08:34,582 --> 00:08:37,959
She sees horrible stuff
that's gonna happen in the future.
208
00:08:38,040 --> 00:08:39,625
It is her curse.
209
00:08:39,709 --> 00:08:41,875
One of the many things
I find irresistible about her.
210
00:08:42,875 --> 00:08:44,792
I see disaster in the cafeterium.
211
00:08:44,917 --> 00:08:46,709
The roof is falling.
212
00:08:46,792 --> 00:08:49,290
I see the new guy. I see the roof falling
213
00:08:49,375 --> 00:08:50,709
-on the new guy.
-Huh?
214
00:08:51,959 --> 00:08:53,208
That can't happen, can it?
215
00:08:53,290 --> 00:08:55,709
I mean, this place
is built to last, right?
216
00:08:55,792 --> 00:08:56,625
Don't worry about it.
217
00:08:56,709 --> 00:08:58,040
She made this wild prediction
218
00:08:58,125 --> 00:09:00,542
that I would make a fool
of myself in public.
219
00:09:00,625 --> 00:09:03,208
Ha! But I don't care,
220
00:09:03,291 --> 00:09:07,750
Because I am hopelessly devoted
221
00:09:07,834 --> 00:09:10,834
to her. Oh, I love her so much.
222
00:09:10,917 --> 00:09:14,709
Oh, oh, oh, oh. What are you looking at?
223
00:09:16,208 --> 00:09:17,542
The ceiling's falling!
224
00:09:19,667 --> 00:09:20,750
[Adonis] oh, Icky.
225
00:09:21,875 --> 00:09:22,834
Destiny calls.
226
00:09:28,709 --> 00:09:31,458
-You can't do this.
-Yes I can. Refills are free.
227
00:09:31,542 --> 00:09:33,208
I'm going to talk to Adonis about this.
228
00:09:33,290 --> 00:09:35,040
It's-- it's just not fair.
229
00:09:35,125 --> 00:09:37,792
Life got fair? Why wasn't I told?
230
00:09:38,583 --> 00:09:40,333
Hmm...
231
00:09:42,458 --> 00:09:44,125
Hey, I think you dropped this.
232
00:09:44,208 --> 00:09:45,040
Mm-hmm.
233
00:09:45,125 --> 00:09:47,417
You may rejoin the underclass now.
234
00:09:48,750 --> 00:09:49,583
This is empty!
235
00:09:49,667 --> 00:09:52,583
Refills are free. Help yourself.
236
00:09:52,667 --> 00:09:55,000
Don't be ridiculous.
237
00:09:55,083 --> 00:09:56,875
I never do anything for myself.
238
00:09:57,000 --> 00:10:00,333
For example, I'm inclined
to humiliate you now.
239
00:10:00,583 --> 00:10:01,917
Humiliate him now.
240
00:10:02,667 --> 00:10:04,041
Whoa!
241
00:10:06,959 --> 00:10:07,917
Ow!
242
00:10:12,667 --> 00:10:15,083
Hey, I think you dropped this.
243
00:10:16,625 --> 00:10:21,000
I've seen gorgons with better pictures
than that. Ha ha ha.
244
00:10:21,083 --> 00:10:23,500
[laughing]
245
00:10:28,500 --> 00:10:31,041
Oh, sure, his pride is destroyed.
246
00:10:31,125 --> 00:10:32,959
His reputation annihilated.
247
00:10:33,040 --> 00:10:35,792
But the roof did not fall.
248
00:10:35,875 --> 00:10:36,709
[sighs]
249
00:10:36,792 --> 00:10:39,417
I think I could have handled the roof.
250
00:10:40,792 --> 00:10:43,875
[Phil] OK, rookie, show me what you got.
251
00:10:43,959 --> 00:10:44,875
[whinny]
252
00:10:46,290 --> 00:10:47,917
[blows whistle]
253
00:10:59,542 --> 00:11:01,041
[disappointed whinny]
254
00:11:01,875 --> 00:11:03,208
How did I do?
255
00:11:03,291 --> 00:11:04,709
[muffled] You seem distracted.
256
00:11:04,792 --> 00:11:06,125
Huh?
257
00:11:07,959 --> 00:11:10,041
You seem distracted.
258
00:11:10,125 --> 00:11:11,583
[chirps]
259
00:11:12,250 --> 00:11:15,417
Phil, what was school like for you?
260
00:11:15,500 --> 00:11:17,458
I learned what I know
on the streets.
261
00:11:17,667 --> 00:11:19,250
The school of hard knocks.
262
00:11:19,333 --> 00:11:20,834
And since I took you on,
263
00:11:20,917 --> 00:11:23,542
I feel like I'm doing
my post-graduate work.
264
00:11:23,625 --> 00:11:25,417
Sorry, Phil. It's just that...
265
00:11:25,500 --> 00:11:28,291
Everybody at school thinks I'm a loser.
266
00:11:28,375 --> 00:11:29,667
Yeah, yeah,
267
00:11:29,750 --> 00:11:33,125
Achilles went through the same thing
with them orthopedic sandals.
268
00:11:33,500 --> 00:11:34,667
What do you think you are?
269
00:11:34,750 --> 00:11:36,417
I'm not so sure sometimes.
270
00:11:36,500 --> 00:11:38,583
[sad whinny]
271
00:11:38,667 --> 00:11:40,875
Kid, forget everybody else.
272
00:11:40,959 --> 00:11:42,333
Figure out what you think.
273
00:11:43,750 --> 00:11:46,333
Oh, I believe this belongs to you.
274
00:11:46,750 --> 00:11:48,417
Oh, sorry.
275
00:11:49,417 --> 00:11:51,000
Phil's right.
276
00:11:51,083 --> 00:11:53,375
It shouldn't matter what
everybody else thinks.
277
00:11:53,458 --> 00:11:54,290
[snorts]
278
00:11:54,375 --> 00:11:56,625
But it does matter... a lot.
279
00:11:56,709 --> 00:11:59,667
How do I prove to everybody at school
I'm not a loser?
280
00:12:04,458 --> 00:12:05,333
A fight?
281
00:12:05,625 --> 00:12:08,959
That jerk Adonis, I'd love to... nah.
282
00:12:09,041 --> 00:12:10,834
It's against school rules.
283
00:12:11,792 --> 00:12:14,500
Oh, fight the monster.
284
00:12:14,583 --> 00:12:16,750
Pegasus, you're a genius.
285
00:12:16,834 --> 00:12:19,750
Tonight, I'm going to prove
that I'm a hero.
286
00:12:19,834 --> 00:12:21,500
We're going to the Realm...
287
00:12:21,583 --> 00:12:23,000
of Monsters.
288
00:12:23,208 --> 00:12:25,625
[loud whinny]
289
00:12:29,458 --> 00:12:31,959
[Bob] And so in the Realm of Monsters,
290
00:12:32,040 --> 00:12:35,667
Hercules sought a worthy foeto prove himself a hero.
291
00:12:35,792 --> 00:12:37,917
[Thalia] Honey, that's not Hercules.
292
00:12:38,000 --> 00:12:39,875
[Bob] Oh. Oh, sorry.
293
00:12:40,040 --> 00:12:41,750
Speedy Pita delivery guy.
294
00:12:41,834 --> 00:12:43,500
You're dinner's here.
295
00:12:45,125 --> 00:12:46,709
You know, I'm not big on pitas.
296
00:12:46,792 --> 00:12:50,375
No, I'm more of a people person.
297
00:12:50,458 --> 00:12:52,583
Aah!
298
00:12:52,667 --> 00:12:53,750
Heh heh.
299
00:12:53,834 --> 00:12:55,290
Huh?
300
00:13:00,875 --> 00:13:04,750
Tremble before mighty Echidna!
301
00:13:04,834 --> 00:13:08,166
The mother of all monsters?
302
00:13:08,250 --> 00:13:10,000
I'm putting in for a new route.
303
00:13:10,083 --> 00:13:11,667
Orthos, your blood feast
304
00:13:11,750 --> 00:13:13,959
is the most important meal of the day.
305
00:13:14,041 --> 00:13:15,542
And what do you eat?
306
00:13:15,625 --> 00:13:16,917
Junk food.
307
00:13:17,041 --> 00:13:18,250
Unh!
308
00:13:18,333 --> 00:13:20,500
Aah!
309
00:13:21,083 --> 00:13:22,041
But, Ma...
310
00:13:22,125 --> 00:13:24,333
Shut your pie hole, little mister.
311
00:13:24,417 --> 00:13:25,458
Mother.
312
00:13:25,542 --> 00:13:27,125
That goes double for you.
313
00:13:27,208 --> 00:13:28,834
Oh, where did I go wrong?
314
00:13:28,917 --> 00:13:32,333
Your brothers and sisters
are out there night and day.
315
00:13:32,417 --> 00:13:34,125
They're eviscerating armies.
316
00:13:34,208 --> 00:13:37,458
Leveling city-states to eat only the best.
317
00:13:37,542 --> 00:13:38,709
But what do you do?
318
00:13:39,417 --> 00:13:43,040
You stuff your faces
with pita delivery boys.
319
00:13:43,125 --> 00:13:45,375
We ate that musaca guy once.
320
00:13:46,875 --> 00:13:49,125
What have I always told you?
321
00:13:50,500 --> 00:13:54,709
You can't be a somebody
if you eat a nobody.
322
00:13:54,792 --> 00:13:59,290
That's right. So starting tonight,
you are on a strict diet.
323
00:13:59,375 --> 00:14:01,834
You are to gorge
only upon the upper crust.
324
00:14:01,917 --> 00:14:06,291
Like a king or a prince
or at least a hero.
325
00:14:06,375 --> 00:14:09,959
[Bob] And so in the Realm of Monsters,Hercules--
326
00:14:10,041 --> 00:14:11,417
[Thalia] Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
327
00:14:11,500 --> 00:14:12,667
We all got the beat now.
328
00:14:12,750 --> 00:14:15,166
This is the domain of Echidna.
329
00:14:15,250 --> 00:14:18,291
-Huh?
-The mother of all monsters.
330
00:14:22,959 --> 00:14:25,083
[stomping]
331
00:14:25,959 --> 00:14:27,792
Do you even know where you're going?
332
00:14:27,875 --> 00:14:31,417
No, but I do know we have to eat
somebody important
333
00:14:31,500 --> 00:14:33,208
or mother's going to eat us.
334
00:14:33,290 --> 00:14:35,750
-[gasp] She wouldn't.
-I think she would.
335
00:14:35,834 --> 00:14:39,250
The last couple of family reunions
had some empty seats.
336
00:14:39,333 --> 00:14:40,290
There was talk.
337
00:14:41,583 --> 00:14:43,583
Here's how I see it. I defeat a monster.
338
00:14:43,667 --> 00:14:46,208
Word spreads at school, "Herc's a hero!"
339
00:14:46,290 --> 00:14:47,583
Life is fair again.
340
00:14:50,417 --> 00:14:52,165
OK, that was fast.
341
00:14:52,250 --> 00:14:55,250
Nothing personal, but I'm going to have
to defeat you in battle.
342
00:14:55,333 --> 00:14:56,250
[yawns]
343
00:14:57,375 --> 00:14:58,709
And who exactly are you?
344
00:14:58,792 --> 00:14:59,875
The name's Hercules.
345
00:14:59,959 --> 00:15:00,875
Never heard of you.
346
00:15:00,959 --> 00:15:02,875
I know. Nobody has.
347
00:15:02,959 --> 00:15:04,417
N-no offense, peewee,
348
00:15:04,500 --> 00:15:06,125
but our mother has us on a strict diet.
349
00:15:06,208 --> 00:15:07,667
Royalty and heroes only.
350
00:15:07,750 --> 00:15:09,959
Well, I'm a hero-in-training.
351
00:15:10,041 --> 00:15:11,166
Does that count?
352
00:15:11,250 --> 00:15:14,875
Maybe not as an entree, but as a snack.
353
00:15:15,458 --> 00:15:16,333
Unh!
354
00:15:16,917 --> 00:15:18,834
Ow! Cut it out.
355
00:15:19,500 --> 00:15:20,542
He's stale.
356
00:15:20,625 --> 00:15:22,166
Well, just check for an expiration date.
357
00:15:22,250 --> 00:15:24,041
Mm-hmm. It's usually on the bottom
right here, right?
358
00:15:24,500 --> 00:15:27,375
Ah, forget him. He's stale,
and he's a nobody.
359
00:15:28,291 --> 00:15:30,083
Unh. Ow.
360
00:15:30,542 --> 00:15:31,875
I'm not a nobody.
361
00:15:32,959 --> 00:15:34,500
Unh!
362
00:15:35,290 --> 00:15:37,500
Living in denial.
363
00:15:37,583 --> 00:15:39,165
[grunting]
364
00:15:43,542 --> 00:15:45,917
I am somebody. Somebody important.
365
00:15:46,040 --> 00:15:46,959
Prove it.
366
00:15:47,040 --> 00:15:48,542
Uh, uh...
367
00:15:48,667 --> 00:15:52,458
I am a student at the Prometheus Academy.
368
00:15:53,208 --> 00:15:54,709
Hey! Whoa.
369
00:15:54,792 --> 00:15:57,625
Aye, what a ghastly likeness.
370
00:15:57,709 --> 00:15:59,125
Ever hear of a comb?
371
00:16:02,041 --> 00:16:04,500
Actually, I've heard of this school.
Quite prestigious.
372
00:16:04,583 --> 00:16:07,834
So they've gotta have some very important
upper crusty people there.
373
00:16:07,917 --> 00:16:09,750
We could check it out.
374
00:16:09,834 --> 00:16:10,667
You mean that?
375
00:16:10,750 --> 00:16:12,625
Brother, let's go.
376
00:16:12,709 --> 00:16:16,709
Hey! That costs 10 drachma
if lost or stolen.
377
00:16:24,834 --> 00:16:26,000
[groans]
378
00:16:26,166 --> 00:16:29,250
Got 10 drachma I can borrow?
379
00:16:29,667 --> 00:16:32,333
♪ Herc's most dangerous lesson's ♪
380
00:16:32,417 --> 00:16:34,625
♪ About to begin ♪
381
00:16:34,709 --> 00:16:37,959
♪ Cassandra's predicted his doom ♪
382
00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:38,959
-♪ Shoo-wop ♪-♪ Shoo-wop ♪
383
00:16:39,083 --> 00:16:42,165
♪ On top of our hero ♪
384
00:16:42,250 --> 00:16:44,290
♪ The roof is gonna fall ♪
385
00:16:44,375 --> 00:16:46,375
♪ You don't want to miss it ♪
386
00:16:46,458 --> 00:16:51,583
♪ Stay tuned ♪
387
00:16:57,125 --> 00:16:58,834
[groans] How late am I?
388
00:16:58,917 --> 00:17:00,083
-Rome fell.
-What?
389
00:17:00,166 --> 00:17:02,458
Kidding. That won't happen for centuries.
390
00:17:02,542 --> 00:17:04,083
You only missed geometry.
391
00:17:04,165 --> 00:17:06,208
Mr. Euclid didn't even take attendance.
392
00:17:06,290 --> 00:17:08,625
What with the rampaging cyclops and all.
393
00:17:08,709 --> 00:17:10,709
A cyclops? How many heads?
394
00:17:10,791 --> 00:17:13,000
Two, I think. Could be a new student.
395
00:17:13,083 --> 00:17:14,500
Ah, somebody said he's got an i.d.
396
00:17:14,583 --> 00:17:16,583
I heard the picture on it is hideous.
397
00:17:16,709 --> 00:17:18,000
-My i.d.
-[screaming]
398
00:17:19,040 --> 00:17:22,290
All royalty and important people
line up to the left.
399
00:17:22,375 --> 00:17:24,375
Everyone else is excused.
400
00:17:24,458 --> 00:17:27,416
Cooperate and no one will be hurt.
401
00:17:27,500 --> 00:17:28,917
Except they will get eaten.
402
00:17:29,000 --> 00:17:29,834
Well, that's a given.
403
00:17:31,458 --> 00:17:32,792
[sighs]
404
00:17:32,875 --> 00:17:35,000
They never make it easy.
405
00:17:35,125 --> 00:17:36,709
I'll make it easy for you.
406
00:17:36,792 --> 00:17:39,208
Leave now and there won't be any trouble.
407
00:17:39,291 --> 00:17:41,458
Hey, it's the stale nobody kid.
408
00:17:41,542 --> 00:17:43,625
Thanks for the hot tip.
409
00:17:43,709 --> 00:17:45,000
Yeah. Dynamite buffet.
410
00:17:45,083 --> 00:17:47,542
There's been a change in the menu.
411
00:17:47,625 --> 00:17:52,000
No flesh this day,
instead you shall taste my blade.
412
00:17:52,208 --> 00:17:54,709
Here. Make him taste my blade.
413
00:17:54,792 --> 00:17:57,083
[shouting]
414
00:18:01,792 --> 00:18:04,166
Hey, you've got something back there.
415
00:18:04,250 --> 00:18:06,291
-Did I get it? Higher.
-W-where?
416
00:18:06,375 --> 00:18:09,000
-To the left.
-Wait. Here? Are you mirroring me,
417
00:18:09,083 --> 00:18:09,875
Or are you just--
418
00:18:09,959 --> 00:18:11,375
-A little more.
-Did I get it!
419
00:18:11,625 --> 00:18:12,834
-[screaming]
-Bingo.
420
00:18:13,250 --> 00:18:15,458
Adonis, this is my fight.
421
00:18:15,542 --> 00:18:18,250
I'm sure you mean well, stale nobody kid.
422
00:18:18,333 --> 00:18:21,333
Look, like we told you before,
We can't waste our time on you.
423
00:18:21,417 --> 00:18:24,000
I am a hero-in-training.
424
00:18:24,083 --> 00:18:26,709
And thus you may be a somebody someday.
425
00:18:26,792 --> 00:18:29,041
But right now, you are a nobody.
426
00:18:29,125 --> 00:18:30,709
Well, he's got you there.
427
00:18:30,792 --> 00:18:33,125
I, on the other hand, am a prince.
428
00:18:33,208 --> 00:18:35,458
Right now, at this very moment,
429
00:18:35,542 --> 00:18:36,875
a bona fide prince.
430
00:18:36,959 --> 00:18:38,875
-No!
-[Adonis] Hey! Aah!
431
00:18:38,959 --> 00:18:41,583
We shall dine like royalty.
432
00:18:41,792 --> 00:18:44,291
Or on royalty, as the case may be.
433
00:18:44,375 --> 00:18:45,250
Wait!
434
00:18:45,333 --> 00:18:46,417
You can't eat him!
435
00:18:47,333 --> 00:18:48,458
Can, too.
436
00:18:48,542 --> 00:18:50,291
Mom said we could eat princes.
437
00:18:50,375 --> 00:18:52,542
But how are you going to prove
to your mom
438
00:18:52,625 --> 00:18:53,583
that he was a prince?
439
00:18:53,667 --> 00:18:55,041
We'll save some bones.
440
00:18:55,166 --> 00:18:57,125
Everybody's the same under their skin.
441
00:18:57,208 --> 00:18:58,625
That is not true.
442
00:18:59,542 --> 00:19:01,041
I mean, right.
443
00:19:01,208 --> 00:19:04,000
We are all brothers under the skin.
444
00:19:04,083 --> 00:19:04,959
Aah!
445
00:19:05,041 --> 00:19:07,208
We gotta show Mom that we made good.
446
00:19:07,291 --> 00:19:09,125
Uh, should we wrap him to go?
447
00:19:09,208 --> 00:19:14,375
No. We can have our prince
and eat him, too.
448
00:19:15,083 --> 00:19:16,625
Smile.
449
00:19:16,709 --> 00:19:18,458
Very well.
450
00:19:18,542 --> 00:19:22,125
I'm not used to working
under hostage conditions.
451
00:19:22,208 --> 00:19:24,375
Not that you care.
I mean, you are a rather odd,
452
00:19:24,458 --> 00:19:25,709
Hideous looking two-eyed--
453
00:19:25,834 --> 00:19:27,750
Well, one-eyed, two-headed thing.
454
00:19:27,834 --> 00:19:29,500
When I say thing, I mean cyclops.
455
00:19:29,583 --> 00:19:31,375
And I-- that's me-- am not--
456
00:19:31,458 --> 00:19:32,917
Just take the picture!
457
00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:34,083
Unh!
458
00:19:34,166 --> 00:19:36,333
Say feta cheese.
459
00:19:40,208 --> 00:19:42,458
[grunting]
460
00:19:46,500 --> 00:19:49,333
Oh, uh, that actually hurt.
461
00:19:49,417 --> 00:19:55,208
OK, stale nobody kid, prepare for pain.
462
00:19:55,333 --> 00:19:57,417
The name is Hercules.
463
00:20:22,208 --> 00:20:24,291
Aah!
464
00:20:27,792 --> 00:20:29,125
Uh-oh.
465
00:20:30,625 --> 00:20:32,500
Aah!
466
00:20:32,583 --> 00:20:35,750
Wow. Two heads. Oh!
467
00:20:35,834 --> 00:20:38,375
You could eat and think
at the same time.
468
00:20:44,959 --> 00:20:46,041
-Huh?
-Huh?
469
00:20:48,083 --> 00:20:48,959
[sobs]
470
00:20:49,125 --> 00:20:54,000
He was to be the best man
at our wedding.
471
00:20:54,083 --> 00:20:56,625
Oh, I was on the cusp
of an emotion,
472
00:20:56,709 --> 00:20:58,625
And you just made that impossible.
473
00:20:58,709 --> 00:21:00,959
Cassandra, good call on the roof.
474
00:21:01,041 --> 00:21:02,917
I foretold you so.
475
00:21:03,083 --> 00:21:06,417
But you didn't see that I'd beat
the two-headed cyclops.
476
00:21:06,500 --> 00:21:08,750
Well, I guess Adonis didn't see it
that way either.
477
00:21:08,834 --> 00:21:12,709
I guess you could say 'twas beauty
that killed the beast.
478
00:21:12,834 --> 00:21:14,041
[moaning]
479
00:21:14,125 --> 00:21:15,917
Play along. I'll make it
worth your while.
480
00:21:16,041 --> 00:21:18,125
Everybody thinks he saved the day.
481
00:21:18,208 --> 00:21:20,000
Oh, two-fist him.
482
00:21:21,166 --> 00:21:22,834
Well, it worked on the bi-clops.
483
00:21:22,917 --> 00:21:25,291
Ah, forget it. It doesn't matter.
484
00:21:25,375 --> 00:21:28,375
Is this abject defeat
or newfound maturity?
485
00:21:28,458 --> 00:21:30,125
Who cares what everybody else thinks?
486
00:21:30,208 --> 00:21:31,083
You know what's important?
487
00:21:31,250 --> 00:21:32,125
What I think.
488
00:21:32,208 --> 00:21:33,375
And I think I'm...
489
00:21:33,542 --> 00:21:35,041
I'm doing OK.
490
00:21:35,125 --> 00:21:36,333
Maturity.
491
00:21:36,625 --> 00:21:39,041
Perhaps the greatest foe of all.
492
00:21:39,375 --> 00:21:41,417
[shivers]
493
00:21:45,333 --> 00:21:47,500
♪ So ends this tale ♪
494
00:21:47,625 --> 00:21:50,125
♪ Of a humble beginning ♪
495
00:21:50,208 --> 00:21:52,709
♪ The hero won't always ♪
496
00:21:52,792 --> 00:21:55,375
♪ Get glory for winning ♪
497
00:21:55,542 --> 00:21:57,917
♪ But that's how it goes ♪
498
00:21:58,000 --> 00:22:00,625
♪ I suppose that it shows ♪
499
00:22:00,709 --> 00:22:02,750
♪ You need two fists to fight ♪
500
00:22:02,834 --> 00:22:05,375
♪ When your foe's ♪
501
00:22:05,458 --> 00:22:07,542
♪ Got more ♪
502
00:22:07,625 --> 00:22:13,166
♪ Than one nose ♪
503
00:22:14,041 --> 00:22:15,583
♪ Yeah ♪
504
00:22:16,959 --> 00:22:18,875
[theme music playing]
34866
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