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1
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- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -
2
00:00:06,520 --> 00:00:08,521
Hey, Tiffany, you have a second?
3
00:00:08,522 --> 00:00:10,523
- For you, I got 20.
- Great.
4
00:00:10,524 --> 00:00:13,526
Um... okay, uh...
5
00:00:13,527 --> 00:00:15,528
You know Terry busted the dishwasher,
6
00:00:15,529 --> 00:00:18,657
and bills are piling up.
7
00:00:18,658 --> 00:00:20,825
I'm gonna have to get
a job, really, any job.
8
00:00:20,826 --> 00:00:24,037
So I need you to help
me out more with...
9
00:00:24,038 --> 00:00:27,457
or really at all, with the kids.
10
00:00:27,458 --> 00:00:29,167
No problem. [CHUCKLES]
11
00:00:29,168 --> 00:00:31,961
Not to toot my own horn, but toot-toot,
12
00:00:31,962 --> 00:00:34,464
I did a pretty good job
of raising my own kids.
13
00:00:34,465 --> 00:00:37,008
[GRUNTING]
14
00:00:37,009 --> 00:00:38,760
Don't worry about this moldy old tent
15
00:00:38,761 --> 00:00:40,680
messing up your kitchen.
16
00:00:43,182 --> 00:00:45,225
It's going in the living room.
17
00:00:45,226 --> 00:00:49,062
[PLAYFUL MUSIC]
18
00:00:49,063 --> 00:00:51,272
I supposed I could step it up a bit.
19
00:00:51,273 --> 00:00:52,649
Thank you.
20
00:00:52,650 --> 00:00:54,484
And there... there is one more thing.
21
00:00:54,485 --> 00:00:56,111
- Um...
- Uh-huh?
22
00:00:56,112 --> 00:00:59,614
I really need you to
stop having all of your...
23
00:00:59,615 --> 00:01:03,201
your gentlemen callers come by.
24
00:01:03,202 --> 00:01:05,286
Beth, God,
25
00:01:05,287 --> 00:01:07,080
you... you have the wrong idea about me.
26
00:01:07,081 --> 00:01:09,666
- I am not that kind of woman.
- [TOILET FLUSHES]
27
00:01:09,667 --> 00:01:11,376
Well, there's no judgment.
28
00:01:11,377 --> 00:01:13,253
I just can't have the
boys seeing you bring home
29
00:01:13,254 --> 00:01:15,296
every Tom, Dick, and Harry.
30
00:01:15,297 --> 00:01:16,798
Okay...
31
00:01:16,799 --> 00:01:20,218
we got to hit the road, Tiff.
32
00:01:20,219 --> 00:01:22,388
For the record, his name is Joe.
33
00:01:24,724 --> 00:01:27,730
[WHIMSICAL MUSIC]
34
00:02:12,855 --> 00:02:15,356
Uh, what are you doing, Uncle Terry?
35
00:02:15,357 --> 00:02:17,275
I was, uh...
36
00:02:17,276 --> 00:02:19,235
I was starting to feel
like a guest on the sofa,
37
00:02:19,236 --> 00:02:23,198
but I want to be more
permanent around here, so, uh...
38
00:02:23,199 --> 00:02:26,117
I'm creating my own
personal living space.
39
00:02:26,118 --> 00:02:29,829
I guess that makes sense, kind of.
40
00:02:29,830 --> 00:02:31,539
Hey, what's with the lemons?
41
00:02:31,540 --> 00:02:32,749
You know, if you want
to learn about juggling,
42
00:02:32,750 --> 00:02:34,417
your Uncle Terry's the man.
43
00:02:34,418 --> 00:02:36,252
I spent two weeks at
Cirque du Soleil camp...
44
00:02:36,253 --> 00:02:38,171
till I got into a fight
with a loud-mouthed mime.
45
00:02:38,172 --> 00:02:40,215
No one puts me in an invisible box.
46
00:02:40,216 --> 00:02:41,633
No, actually, I was thinking
47
00:02:41,634 --> 00:02:43,092
of opening up my own lemonade stand,
48
00:02:43,093 --> 00:02:44,719
and giving the money to Mom.
49
00:02:44,720 --> 00:02:46,554
That's a great idea.
50
00:02:46,555 --> 00:02:48,681
You know, your father and I
did that when we were kids.
51
00:02:48,682 --> 00:02:50,433
You... you... you should use
the, uh, the... the... the...
52
00:02:50,434 --> 00:02:52,477
that crazy lemon squeezer
he invented for us.
53
00:02:52,478 --> 00:02:54,395
I think I saw it down in the basement,
54
00:02:54,396 --> 00:02:56,314
last time I accidentally
locked myself in the basement.
55
00:02:56,315 --> 00:02:57,816
You know what? I'll go get it.
56
00:02:57,817 --> 00:02:59,400
You just keep airing this tent out.
57
00:02:59,401 --> 00:03:00,860
Yeah, and don't worry about the spiders.
58
00:03:00,861 --> 00:03:02,445
Those little eight-legged bloodsuckers
59
00:03:02,446 --> 00:03:04,322
are more scared of you
than you are of them,
60
00:03:04,323 --> 00:03:05,406
especially the babies.
61
00:03:05,407 --> 00:03:07,367
Spiders? [GASPS]
62
00:03:07,368 --> 00:03:09,327
[SAM] As a spelling bee runner-up,
63
00:03:09,328 --> 00:03:12,121
it hurts to write "olde" with an E.
64
00:03:12,122 --> 00:03:15,124
Also, I'm pretty sure
that "timey" isn't a word.
65
00:03:15,125 --> 00:03:17,752
Liam told me to write that
because we're building a brand,
66
00:03:17,753 --> 00:03:20,296
and nostalgia is very now,
67
00:03:20,297 --> 00:03:21,840
whatever that means.
68
00:03:21,841 --> 00:03:23,591
Check out my dad's Squeezerator.
69
00:03:23,592 --> 00:03:25,510
You put lemons in like this,
70
00:03:25,511 --> 00:03:27,204
and...
71
00:03:28,305 --> 00:03:29,973
press the red button.
72
00:03:29,974 --> 00:03:31,766
- [HORN HONKS]
- Ta-da.
73
00:03:31,767 --> 00:03:34,853
- That's amazing...
- [SQUEAKING]
74
00:03:34,854 --> 00:03:36,938
And it's definitely
gonna give me nightmares.
75
00:03:36,939 --> 00:03:39,023
You guys have a serious problem.
76
00:03:39,024 --> 00:03:42,652
Those new neighbor kids
opened their own lemonade stand
77
00:03:40,943 --> 00:03:42,652
around the corner.
78
00:03:42,653 --> 00:03:45,113
They've got free Krazy
Straws and a shade-brella.
79
00:03:45,114 --> 00:03:49,075
Isn't there room for more than one
lemonade stand in the neighborhood?
80
00:03:49,076 --> 00:03:52,495
Of course not. Haven't
you read "Outliers"?
81
00:03:52,496 --> 00:03:54,956
Or any Gladwell at all?
82
00:03:54,957 --> 00:03:57,834
Oh, boys, you are so
lucky that I'm here.
83
00:03:57,835 --> 00:03:59,127
I'm going to give you the benefit
84
00:03:59,128 --> 00:04:01,170
of my prodigious business acumen.
85
00:04:01,171 --> 00:04:03,172
I have no idea what that means.
86
00:04:03,173 --> 00:04:05,091
That means when life gives you Liam,
87
00:04:05,092 --> 00:04:07,719
you make Liam-ade.
88
00:04:07,720 --> 00:04:09,220
I think we'll be okay on our own.
89
00:04:09,221 --> 00:04:11,139
That's what Bernard J. Whittle said.
90
00:04:11,140 --> 00:04:13,266
Who's Bernard J. Wittle?
91
00:04:13,267 --> 00:04:15,143
Exactly.
92
00:04:15,144 --> 00:04:19,522
[LIGHT MUSIC]
93
00:04:19,523 --> 00:04:22,025
- Here you go.
- Enjoy.
94
00:04:22,026 --> 00:04:23,610
Tell your friends!
95
00:04:23,611 --> 00:04:26,029
And tell them I had nothing
to do with the spelling.
96
00:04:26,030 --> 00:04:28,781
Hey, look, it's Bobby and Tyra,
97
00:04:28,782 --> 00:04:31,326
those neighbor kids
Liam was talking about.
98
00:04:31,327 --> 00:04:32,994
Hey, guys!
99
00:04:32,995 --> 00:04:36,205
How's it going with
the lemonade... stand?
100
00:04:36,206 --> 00:04:38,708
[BOTH SCREAMING]
101
00:04:38,709 --> 00:04:41,586
- No!
- No! Please stop!
102
00:04:41,587 --> 00:04:43,838
- Ah!
- [GASPS]
103
00:04:43,839 --> 00:04:46,341
Those jerks.
104
00:04:46,342 --> 00:04:49,385
Why is this water sticky?
105
00:04:49,386 --> 00:04:51,429
It's Mountain Dew!
106
00:04:51,430 --> 00:04:53,306
[STAMMERS] I'm not allowed
to drink this stuff.
107
00:04:53,307 --> 00:04:55,642
My mom says it gives
me the sugar shakes.
108
00:04:55,643 --> 00:04:58,227
[SLURPING]
109
00:04:58,228 --> 00:05:02,065
[SOFT COMICAL MUSIC]
110
00:05:02,066 --> 00:05:03,900
Okay...
111
00:05:03,901 --> 00:05:06,027
getting the Astrovan clean.
112
00:05:06,028 --> 00:05:07,862
You know, needs to be semi-presentable
113
00:05:07,863 --> 00:05:11,032
if I'm gonna be driving
rideshare customers around.
114
00:05:11,033 --> 00:05:13,493
So, listen, guys, Tiffany's
gonna be watching you
115
00:05:13,494 --> 00:05:15,745
a little more now that I have a job,
116
00:05:15,746 --> 00:05:18,831
so I need you to mind her.
117
00:05:18,832 --> 00:05:21,542
Got it, Mom.
118
00:05:21,543 --> 00:05:23,127
Malcolm Gladwell and I warned you.
119
00:05:23,128 --> 00:05:25,129
- [SIGHS]
- Business is war.
120
00:05:25,130 --> 00:05:28,424
But you can't just fold after
one minor market disruption.
121
00:05:28,425 --> 00:05:30,343
You're right.
122
00:05:30,344 --> 00:05:31,803
I need to get even.
123
00:05:31,804 --> 00:05:34,305
An excellent counterstrategy.
124
00:05:34,306 --> 00:05:36,849
Leave it up to my
brains and Dash's brawn.
125
00:05:36,850 --> 00:05:38,643
I have brains, too.
126
00:05:38,644 --> 00:05:41,270
I just like to use
them for breaking stuff.
127
00:05:41,271 --> 00:05:43,064
Whoa, whoa, guys,
128
00:05:43,065 --> 00:05:46,150
I never said I wanted to break anything.
129
00:05:46,151 --> 00:05:48,069
Don't be so sure.
130
00:05:48,070 --> 00:05:51,948
Free love is great, but
revenge is sweet, too.
131
00:05:51,949 --> 00:05:55,702
No, no. No one's getting
revenge on anyone.
132
00:05:55,703 --> 00:05:57,620
What kind of advice is that?
133
00:05:57,621 --> 00:06:00,081
The same kind my mom's mom gave me.
134
00:06:00,082 --> 00:06:03,543
Of course, she was the enforcer
on her roller derby team.
135
00:06:03,544 --> 00:06:07,380
[CHUCKLING NERVOUSLY]
136
00:06:07,381 --> 00:06:10,174
[TERRY COUGHS]
137
00:06:10,175 --> 00:06:11,801
Hey. What are you doing?
138
00:06:11,802 --> 00:06:14,345
Just laying out my bienvenue.
139
00:06:14,346 --> 00:06:16,264
That's French for "welcome mat."
140
00:06:16,265 --> 00:06:17,974
No, what are you doing to my house?
141
00:06:17,975 --> 00:06:20,268
Uh, increasing its value.
142
00:06:20,269 --> 00:06:24,188
I just added an extra
bedroom and a quarter bath.
143
00:06:24,189 --> 00:06:26,691
Oh. Um, okay...
144
00:06:26,692 --> 00:06:28,818
Terry, this is...
145
00:06:28,819 --> 00:06:30,903
this is a terrible idea.
146
00:06:30,904 --> 00:06:33,990
[CHUCKLES] You sound...
you sound just like Patty.
147
00:06:33,991 --> 00:06:35,825
It's like that time, the...
the one time I went to him
148
00:06:35,826 --> 00:06:37,952
with my own idea for
an awesome invention,
149
00:06:37,953 --> 00:06:39,454
and he... he didn't get it either.
150
00:06:39,455 --> 00:06:41,497
When was this?
151
00:06:41,498 --> 00:06:44,083
It was a few years ago.
152
00:06:44,084 --> 00:06:45,835
He said my idea was stupid,
153
00:06:45,836 --> 00:06:47,253
and so I said, "No, you're stupid."
154
00:06:47,254 --> 00:06:48,755
And that's kind of ridiculous,
155
00:06:48,756 --> 00:06:51,841
'cause he was the smartest guy I knew.
156
00:06:51,842 --> 00:06:54,385
We got into this whole fight,
and I... I... I stormed out.
157
00:06:54,386 --> 00:06:57,056
Really? He never told me that.
158
00:06:58,557 --> 00:07:00,475
That was the last thing
I ever said to my brother.
159
00:07:00,476 --> 00:07:04,062
- Um, I...
- Oh, Terry...
160
00:07:04,063 --> 00:07:05,688
Oh...
161
00:07:05,689 --> 00:07:07,690
[SOMBER MUSIC]
162
00:07:07,691 --> 00:07:09,567
I... I...
163
00:07:09,568 --> 00:07:11,444
I thought there'd be
time to fix it, you know.
164
00:07:11,445 --> 00:07:13,780
I thought...
165
00:07:13,781 --> 00:07:15,698
I thought I could make it
right. I should've called him.
166
00:07:15,699 --> 00:07:17,909
I... I...
167
00:07:17,910 --> 00:07:19,911
There wasn't any time.
168
00:07:19,912 --> 00:07:21,954
Yeah, I know how you feel.
169
00:07:21,955 --> 00:07:24,165
I mean, there's never
enough time, you know.
170
00:07:24,166 --> 00:07:26,125
I still have so many things
171
00:07:26,126 --> 00:07:28,211
I want to talk to
Patrick about, too, but...
172
00:07:28,212 --> 00:07:30,296
- [BELL DINGS]
- Oh, my waffles are ready.
173
00:07:30,297 --> 00:07:32,174
- [KNOCKING ON DOOR]
- [MOUTHS WORD]
174
00:07:35,052 --> 00:07:36,761
Hi, Sam. Come on in.
175
00:07:36,762 --> 00:07:38,971
Wyatt, Sam's here.
176
00:07:38,972 --> 00:07:40,973
Oh, hey, Sam. What's up?
177
00:07:40,974 --> 00:07:42,892
I'm quitting the lemonade business.
178
00:07:42,893 --> 00:07:44,769
Consider this my two-minute notice.
179
00:07:44,770 --> 00:07:46,854
What? Why?
180
00:07:46,855 --> 00:07:49,649
Bobby and Tyra hired
that big seventh grader,
181
00:07:49,650 --> 00:07:51,317
who's already shaving,
182
00:07:51,318 --> 00:07:54,028
and they crammed me in
a locker after school.
183
00:07:54,029 --> 00:07:56,280
Those guys are such jerks.
184
00:07:56,281 --> 00:07:58,491
[SIGHS] I'm sorry, Wyatt,
185
00:07:58,492 --> 00:08:00,201
but I need to stay alive long enough
186
00:08:00,202 --> 00:08:02,287
to find out how the
"Star Wars" movies end.
187
00:08:04,665 --> 00:08:07,250
[DOOR CLOSES]
188
00:08:07,251 --> 00:08:09,001
Uncle Terry?
189
00:08:09,002 --> 00:08:11,045
[TERRY] Our armies
are ready for victory,
190
00:08:11,046 --> 00:08:12,421
but we shall reconvene tomorrow.
191
00:08:12,422 --> 00:08:15,133
That is all for now.
192
00:08:15,134 --> 00:08:18,219
And, Achilles, tend to that heel.
193
00:08:18,220 --> 00:08:24,142
[ENCHANTING MUSIC]
194
00:08:24,143 --> 00:08:26,811
Hey, champ. How's it going?
195
00:08:26,812 --> 00:08:28,521
Not good.
196
00:08:28,522 --> 00:08:31,023
These kids are really
messing with me, Dad.
197
00:08:31,024 --> 00:08:33,317
I'm so mad, I don't know
what I feel like doing.
198
00:08:33,318 --> 00:08:36,362
Whoa, whoa, whoa, now,
slow your roll there, buddy.
199
00:08:36,363 --> 00:08:38,447
Let's take a cue from
our friend, Achilles.
200
00:08:38,448 --> 00:08:40,658
He also got mad, and you
know what happened to him.
201
00:08:40,659 --> 00:08:42,827
He became a hero?
202
00:08:42,828 --> 00:08:44,370
Well, yeah, he did,
203
00:08:44,371 --> 00:08:46,122
but he also died in battle
204
00:08:46,123 --> 00:08:47,915
after launching an
all-out attack on Troy.
205
00:08:47,916 --> 00:08:49,584
Now, look, the Greeks won,
206
00:08:49,585 --> 00:08:51,169
but only because they
got a little sneaky.
207
00:08:51,170 --> 00:08:53,045
- My point is...
- Ah! I will destroy you
208
00:08:53,046 --> 00:08:55,339
with my laser sword!
209
00:08:55,340 --> 00:08:57,550
Wait a minute, that's a bug zapper.
210
00:08:57,551 --> 00:08:59,844
- No, it's a...
- [INSECT BUZZING]
211
00:08:59,845 --> 00:09:02,138
- Dang, it is a bug zapper.
- Told you.
212
00:09:02,139 --> 00:09:04,765
See, this is a laser sword.
213
00:09:04,766 --> 00:09:06,142
[SWORD DRONING]
214
00:09:06,143 --> 00:09:07,685
- Run!
- [BOTH YELLING]
215
00:09:07,686 --> 00:09:09,812
Hold on a sec. This I got to see.
216
00:09:09,813 --> 00:09:12,333
No, Wyatt, Wyatt, we got to talk
about what's going on with you!
217
00:09:16,445 --> 00:09:19,156
[TERRY] Are you sure
you don't want a waffle?
218
00:09:22,618 --> 00:09:25,328
Tiffany, seriously?
219
00:09:25,329 --> 00:09:26,829
I thought you were making lunches
220
00:09:26,830 --> 00:09:28,664
and helping the kids
with their homework.
221
00:09:28,665 --> 00:09:31,459
For your information, I have
excellent reasons for that.
222
00:09:31,460 --> 00:09:33,419
Which are?
223
00:09:33,420 --> 00:09:35,296
- Oh, you want to hear them?
- Mm-hmm.
224
00:09:35,297 --> 00:09:37,131
Okay... [SCOFFS]
225
00:09:37,132 --> 00:09:40,259
Homework is just a mind-control tool
226
00:09:40,260 --> 00:09:43,262
used by the dominant paradigm
to subjugate its citizenry.
227
00:09:43,263 --> 00:09:46,641
Uh-huh. And lunch?
228
00:09:46,642 --> 00:09:49,435
- Give me a second on that one.
- Oh, you are unbelievable.
229
00:09:49,436 --> 00:09:51,896
[STAMMERING] All I asked
230
00:09:51,897 --> 00:09:54,023
was that you help out
a little with the kids,
231
00:09:54,024 --> 00:09:55,858
and this is what I get?
232
00:09:55,859 --> 00:09:58,903
Who do you think I'm
beading these necklaces for?
233
00:09:58,904 --> 00:10:01,864
[LIGHT BRASS MUSIC]
234
00:10:01,865 --> 00:10:03,741
In case they ever get a cat.
235
00:10:03,742 --> 00:10:05,826
[SIGHS]
236
00:10:05,827 --> 00:10:07,620
I need your help.
237
00:10:07,621 --> 00:10:09,830
I want to get even with
those idiot neighbor kids.
238
00:10:09,831 --> 00:10:11,999
I've been expecting you, grasshopper.
239
00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:14,252
- Who-hopper?
- Don't worry about it.
240
00:10:14,253 --> 00:10:16,671
Come sit at my feet, while
I devise a clever plan.
241
00:10:16,672 --> 00:10:18,840
[SIGHS]
242
00:10:21,301 --> 00:10:24,095
- What do you have there, Dash?
- Nothing. Butt out.
243
00:10:24,096 --> 00:10:26,430
Whatever. It's revenge time. Listen up.
244
00:10:26,431 --> 00:10:28,349
Word on the street is the
neighbors have muscled up,
245
00:10:28,350 --> 00:10:30,559
so we're gonna have to get super sneaky.
246
00:10:30,560 --> 00:10:33,354
Sneaky. Sneaky like the Greeks.
247
00:10:33,355 --> 00:10:36,440
- I like it.
- You lost me.
248
00:10:36,441 --> 00:10:38,901
And I was already a
little lost to begin with.
249
00:10:38,902 --> 00:10:41,445
You know how they used a
Trojan Horse to win the war.
250
00:10:41,446 --> 00:10:43,572
Maybe we could do something like that.
251
00:10:43,573 --> 00:10:46,200
I've read all about it in
Dad's chapter on the Trojan War.
252
00:10:46,201 --> 00:10:48,077
Well played, Wyatt. You get a cookie.
253
00:10:48,078 --> 00:10:51,122
We have cookies?
254
00:10:51,123 --> 00:10:53,624
Trojan Horse it is.
255
00:10:53,625 --> 00:10:56,335
We'll put you inside that
empty patio-furniture box
256
00:10:56,336 --> 00:10:59,171
in the basement and leave
it at the neighbor's gate.
257
00:10:59,172 --> 00:11:01,924
They'll bring it into the yard,
you'll slip out a trapdoor,
258
00:11:01,925 --> 00:11:05,469
sabotage their lemonade supply, and...
259
00:11:05,470 --> 00:11:07,805
And replace their sugar with salt.
260
00:11:07,806 --> 00:11:10,057
That will ruin everything.
261
00:11:10,058 --> 00:11:12,351
I like it. Dash, you in?
262
00:11:12,352 --> 00:11:14,729
Hey, you had me at "cookies."
263
00:11:14,730 --> 00:11:19,734
[COMICAL MUSIC]
264
00:11:19,735 --> 00:11:21,527
Can you drive quickly?
265
00:11:21,528 --> 00:11:22,778
I have a job interview, and
I want to get there early.
266
00:11:22,779 --> 00:11:25,614
No problem. You need, I speed.
267
00:11:25,615 --> 00:11:28,492
- [SQUISH]
- What the...
268
00:11:28,493 --> 00:11:30,995
[GASPS] Oh... oh, no, I'm so sorry.
269
00:11:30,996 --> 00:11:32,955
That's my son's pudding cup.
270
00:11:32,956 --> 00:11:35,458
This can't be happening, not today!
271
00:11:35,459 --> 00:11:38,377
Oh, wait, don't go!
Um... I need this job,
272
00:11:38,378 --> 00:11:40,880
and I really can't afford
another zero-star rating,
273
00:11:40,881 --> 00:11:43,758
so I promise you, I can fix this.
274
00:11:43,759 --> 00:11:45,676
[CHUCKLES] Also...
275
00:11:45,677 --> 00:11:48,347
there's a half a grilled
cheese stuck to your briefcase.
276
00:11:52,142 --> 00:11:54,728
- [BOTH GRUNTING]
- [EXHALES DEEPLY]
277
00:11:56,980 --> 00:11:59,231
[DOORBELL BUZZES]
278
00:11:59,232 --> 00:12:02,068
Remember, stay quiet. You're furniture.
279
00:12:02,069 --> 00:12:04,154
I got it, Dash. Go.
280
00:12:09,993 --> 00:12:12,995
[CLOTHES DRYER BUZZES]
281
00:12:12,996 --> 00:12:16,040
Hey. Here we go.
282
00:12:16,041 --> 00:12:17,833
No one will ever know.
283
00:12:17,834 --> 00:12:21,295
So, would you recommend
me to your friends?
284
00:12:21,296 --> 00:12:22,963
- You were fine.
- [DOOR OPENS]
285
00:12:22,964 --> 00:12:25,466
- Kind of messy, though.
- Sure, sure.
286
00:12:25,467 --> 00:12:27,385
Look what somebody was throwing out...
287
00:12:27,386 --> 00:12:29,178
or at least left close
enough to the curb
288
00:12:29,179 --> 00:12:30,971
so that it could be
considered public property?
289
00:12:30,972 --> 00:12:32,973
Hey. Nice calves. You a runner?
290
00:12:32,974 --> 00:12:36,560
So, who's bringing who home around here?
291
00:12:36,561 --> 00:12:39,230
Oh, no, he's my client.
292
00:12:39,231 --> 00:12:41,148
No, I... I mean, I picked him up.
293
00:12:41,149 --> 00:12:42,983
No, I... that's not...
that's not what I meant.
294
00:12:42,984 --> 00:12:44,360
That's not what I meant. No...
295
00:12:44,361 --> 00:12:46,153
You people are nuts!
296
00:12:46,154 --> 00:12:48,364
- Hey, that's my kimono!
- Yep, he's a runner.
297
00:12:48,365 --> 00:12:50,074
Okay, well, great, you guys,
298
00:12:50,075 --> 00:12:51,617
because there goes our
new dishwasher, so...
299
00:12:51,618 --> 00:12:54,578
Wait, please, I can make this right!
300
00:12:54,579 --> 00:12:56,539
Beth hired a dishwasher?
301
00:12:56,540 --> 00:12:58,332
I thought we were tight on money.
302
00:12:58,333 --> 00:13:00,042
Tiffany, check it out.
303
00:13:00,043 --> 00:13:01,710
[GRUNTS] Oh, yeah.
304
00:13:01,711 --> 00:13:03,796
Best seat in the
house. [EXHALES SHARPLY]
305
00:13:03,797 --> 00:13:07,762
- Okay!
- [MYSTERIOUS MUSIC]
306
00:13:12,139 --> 00:13:14,641
Coast is clear.
307
00:13:16,726 --> 00:13:18,728
[GRUNTS]
308
00:13:34,494 --> 00:13:36,620
[TYRA] We'll do it later, Mom!
309
00:13:36,621 --> 00:13:39,457
[WOMAN] No, you'll put it away now.
310
00:13:39,458 --> 00:13:41,668
[TYRA] I'll be right there!
311
00:13:59,478 --> 00:14:01,480
[CELL PHONE BLOOPS]
312
00:14:03,648 --> 00:14:05,649
Oh, my God, Wyatt's stuck in the box.
313
00:14:05,650 --> 00:14:07,902
Why is Wyatt in a box?
314
00:14:07,903 --> 00:14:10,404
Oh, yeah, I totally forgot about that.
315
00:14:10,405 --> 00:14:12,990
Come on!
316
00:14:12,991 --> 00:14:15,451
[DOOR OPEN, CLOSES]
317
00:14:15,452 --> 00:14:17,912
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where you boys headed?
318
00:14:17,913 --> 00:14:19,538
- Outside.
- Upstairs.
319
00:14:19,539 --> 00:14:20,998
And where's Wyatt?
320
00:14:20,999 --> 00:14:23,626
- Outside.
- Upstairs.
321
00:14:23,627 --> 00:14:25,295
Okay.
322
00:14:31,426 --> 00:14:34,136
- It's locked.
- It's okay. We did our best.
323
00:14:34,137 --> 00:14:37,056
Every war has collateral
damage. Ours is Wyatt.
324
00:14:37,057 --> 00:14:40,392
We should get out of here
before his loss in vain.
325
00:14:40,393 --> 00:14:42,645
Why do you boys bother lying to me?
326
00:14:42,646 --> 00:14:45,481
I've been lying to the man
since the man was a little boy.
327
00:14:45,482 --> 00:14:47,107
Where's Wyatt?
328
00:14:47,108 --> 00:14:49,193
He's trapped in a box in this backyard.
329
00:14:49,194 --> 00:14:52,113
That's a new one. Stand aside.
330
00:14:58,828 --> 00:15:01,664
Tiffany, one, the man, zero.
331
00:15:01,665 --> 00:15:03,749
Nice moves.
332
00:15:03,750 --> 00:15:05,168
I'm impressed.
333
00:15:10,215 --> 00:15:12,258
I am no longer impressed.
334
00:15:12,259 --> 00:15:14,802
What are you guys doing here?
335
00:15:14,803 --> 00:15:17,304
I don't like your tone, young lady.
336
00:15:17,305 --> 00:15:20,015
That's no way to talk to... guests.
337
00:15:20,016 --> 00:15:21,684
And I especially don't like
338
00:15:21,685 --> 00:15:23,310
that you attacked
Wyatt's lemonade stand.
339
00:15:23,311 --> 00:15:25,020
What are you talking about?
340
00:15:25,021 --> 00:15:26,772
He attacked us first.
341
00:15:26,773 --> 00:15:30,234
Yeah, he bombed us with
Super Soakers for no reason.
342
00:15:30,235 --> 00:15:33,445
That's what started it all.
343
00:15:33,446 --> 00:15:35,155
Is this true?
344
00:15:35,156 --> 00:15:37,116
It was a preemptive strike.
345
00:15:37,117 --> 00:15:40,619
No, we just did it to them
before they could do it to us.
346
00:15:40,620 --> 00:15:44,832
Okay, sounds like there's plenty
of blame here to go around.
347
00:15:44,833 --> 00:15:46,292
[MISCHIEVOUS MUSIC]
348
00:15:46,293 --> 00:15:48,378
Oh, wh... what? Take cover!
349
00:15:52,841 --> 00:15:54,175
[GRUNTS] Ow! Ow!
350
00:15:58,138 --> 00:16:01,348
[GRUNTING]
351
00:16:01,349 --> 00:16:04,685
Well, don't just sit there. Fight back!
352
00:16:04,686 --> 00:16:06,855
- Ow! Ow!
- Ow! Ow!
353
00:16:08,982 --> 00:16:10,983
[GRUNTS]
354
00:16:10,984 --> 00:16:12,651
- Oh!
- [GRUNTS]
355
00:16:12,652 --> 00:16:14,404
[GRUNTS]
356
00:16:19,784 --> 00:16:20,869
Hi, Wyatt.
357
00:16:23,580 --> 00:16:26,206
Welcome to the inside
of the Trojan Horse.
358
00:16:26,207 --> 00:16:29,627
I thought it would be a lot... horsier.
359
00:16:29,628 --> 00:16:31,545
You should've been here
before I Febrezed the place.
360
00:16:31,546 --> 00:16:33,672
- [CHUCKLES]
- Hey...
361
00:16:33,673 --> 00:16:36,967
how long do you think
the Trojan War lasted?
362
00:16:36,968 --> 00:16:38,886
Well, this lemonade fight
363
00:16:38,887 --> 00:16:43,849
has been going on for a
couple of days, so... a week?
364
00:16:43,850 --> 00:16:46,393
Try ten years.
365
00:16:46,394 --> 00:16:47,978
Imagine that.
366
00:16:47,979 --> 00:16:50,397
That's crazy.
367
00:16:50,398 --> 00:16:53,150
This fighting stuff is so confusing.
368
00:16:53,151 --> 00:16:56,528
A minute ago, I wanted to
crush those neighbor kids.
369
00:16:56,529 --> 00:16:59,865
Then I found out that everything
was Dash and Liam's fault.
370
00:16:59,866 --> 00:17:01,200
Everyone thinks they have a good reason
371
00:17:01,201 --> 00:17:03,035
for starting the war,
372
00:17:03,036 --> 00:17:05,287
but there's really no such thing.
373
00:17:05,288 --> 00:17:06,997
And there's way better stuff to do
374
00:17:06,998 --> 00:17:10,542
than spending time
inside a sweaty old horse.
375
00:17:10,543 --> 00:17:12,920
I just wanted to help Mom out.
376
00:17:12,921 --> 00:17:15,172
I never wanted all this fighting.
377
00:17:15,173 --> 00:17:18,842
I just wish I could stop it.
378
00:17:18,843 --> 00:17:20,719
You can.
379
00:17:20,720 --> 00:17:22,596
We all can.
380
00:17:22,597 --> 00:17:24,723
The key is to figure out how.
381
00:17:24,724 --> 00:17:26,350
I'll give you a hint.
382
00:17:26,351 --> 00:17:30,187
It usually starts with an apology.
383
00:17:30,188 --> 00:17:32,398
Can I look through the eyehole?
384
00:17:32,399 --> 00:17:34,066
That's not the eyehole.
385
00:17:34,067 --> 00:17:36,694
The, uh, eyehole's on the
other end of the horse.
386
00:17:36,695 --> 00:17:38,404
- So what is...
- [CHUCKLES]
387
00:17:38,405 --> 00:17:40,155
Oh.
388
00:17:40,156 --> 00:17:42,032
Never mind.
389
00:17:42,033 --> 00:17:44,326
So how do we get out?
390
00:17:44,327 --> 00:17:47,079
Well, there's the trapdoor
behind you or, uh...
391
00:17:47,080 --> 00:17:48,747
door number two.
392
00:17:48,748 --> 00:17:51,709
I vote the trapdoor.
393
00:17:51,710 --> 00:17:53,544
You chose wisely.
394
00:17:53,545 --> 00:17:56,171
[GRUNTING] Ow! Ow!
395
00:17:56,172 --> 00:17:58,549
Stop! Stop!
396
00:17:58,550 --> 00:18:01,635
[SOFT MUSIC]
397
00:18:01,636 --> 00:18:03,722
This war has to end now.
398
00:18:06,141 --> 00:18:09,184
Fighting only leads to
more fighting, and for what?
399
00:18:09,185 --> 00:18:13,188
To win a few yards of lemonade turf?
400
00:18:13,189 --> 00:18:15,983
Bobby, Tyra,
401
00:18:15,984 --> 00:18:18,277
I'm sorry for getting
mad and sneaking in here,
402
00:18:18,278 --> 00:18:20,154
and I'm especially sorry
403
00:18:20,155 --> 00:18:22,698
that my dumb brothers
attacked your lemonade stand.
404
00:18:22,699 --> 00:18:24,909
Technically, I didn't do anything.
405
00:18:27,871 --> 00:18:29,455
Okay, okay.
406
00:18:29,456 --> 00:18:31,373
I'm sorry for messing with you.
407
00:18:31,374 --> 00:18:33,083
In hindsight, I
should've offered a buyout
408
00:18:33,084 --> 00:18:36,128
before going right to hostile takeover.
409
00:18:36,129 --> 00:18:38,589
And I'm sorry I Super-Soaked you guys.
410
00:18:38,590 --> 00:18:40,674
It was super stupid.
411
00:18:40,675 --> 00:18:43,510
I guess we overreacted, too.
412
00:18:43,511 --> 00:18:46,305
We're also sorry.
413
00:18:46,306 --> 00:18:49,517
So... friends?
414
00:18:52,353 --> 00:18:54,188
Nice work, Wyatt.
415
00:18:54,189 --> 00:18:57,149
Now, let's high-tail it home
before your mom busts us.
416
00:18:57,150 --> 00:18:58,817
Joe got us tickets to AC/DC,
417
00:18:58,818 --> 00:19:01,154
and I can't afford to be grounded.
418
00:19:06,326 --> 00:19:07,951
Oh, hi, Beth.
419
00:19:07,952 --> 00:19:10,496
They say Blake Shelton
has three nipples,
420
00:19:10,497 --> 00:19:12,039
and their sources are usually pretty...
421
00:19:12,040 --> 00:19:13,791
I know what happened.
422
00:19:13,792 --> 00:19:16,919
It's probably just a birth defect.
423
00:19:16,920 --> 00:19:19,963
I got suspicious when I
saw you washing clothes
424
00:19:19,964 --> 00:19:22,216
and I hadn't begged you to do it,
425
00:19:22,217 --> 00:19:25,469
so I asked the kids,
and they just... boof...
426
00:19:25,470 --> 00:19:28,514
folded like the laundry you didn't.
427
00:19:28,515 --> 00:19:29,973
[SCOFFS]
428
00:19:29,974 --> 00:19:32,226
Ratted out by my own homies.
429
00:19:32,227 --> 00:19:33,853
That hurts.
430
00:19:36,523 --> 00:19:39,066
I'm sorry, Beth. I...
431
00:19:39,067 --> 00:19:41,276
I know I let you down.
432
00:19:41,277 --> 00:19:45,614
Cooking and homework,
it just isn't my...
433
00:19:45,615 --> 00:19:47,324
Thank you.
434
00:19:47,325 --> 00:19:49,201
What?
435
00:19:49,202 --> 00:19:51,370
A lot of grandmas...
436
00:19:51,371 --> 00:19:53,080
Right, sorry...
437
00:19:53,081 --> 00:19:56,208
Uh, a lot of...
438
00:19:56,209 --> 00:19:58,794
mothers who have children
439
00:19:58,795 --> 00:20:00,420
who have children,
440
00:20:00,421 --> 00:20:02,339
you know, they bake cookies
441
00:20:02,340 --> 00:20:05,385
for those children of their children...
442
00:20:07,011 --> 00:20:09,805
But you, you risked a
lemon attack for them,
443
00:20:09,806 --> 00:20:12,432
and that means a lot to me.
444
00:20:12,433 --> 00:20:15,102
Oh, they mean a lot to me.
445
00:20:15,103 --> 00:20:17,771
They're extremely lovable,
446
00:20:17,772 --> 00:20:19,606
even that little sneak Liam.
447
00:20:19,607 --> 00:20:21,108
He's the one who flipped on me, right?
448
00:20:21,109 --> 00:20:23,235
[CHUCKLES] Okay...
449
00:20:23,236 --> 00:20:25,070
you want to help me fold the laundry?
450
00:20:25,071 --> 00:20:27,155
No...
451
00:20:27,156 --> 00:20:28,575
but I will.
452
00:20:36,082 --> 00:20:37,499
[GONG SOUNDS]
453
00:20:37,500 --> 00:20:39,751
[TERRY] Oh...
454
00:20:39,752 --> 00:20:42,796
- You gonged? [CHUCKLES]
- Uh, yeah.
455
00:20:42,797 --> 00:20:44,339
I found this weird note
456
00:20:44,340 --> 00:20:46,258
in the Great Battles
section of Dad's book.
457
00:20:46,259 --> 00:20:48,135
It's for you.
458
00:20:48,136 --> 00:20:51,680
It says, "Tell Uncle Terry to
look behind the family crest
459
00:20:51,681 --> 00:20:53,765
and tell him I'm sorry."
460
00:20:53,766 --> 00:20:56,393
What's the family crest?
461
00:20:56,394 --> 00:21:00,147
The McKenna blazon is
three lions on a fess sable.
462
00:21:00,148 --> 00:21:01,773
What?
463
00:21:01,774 --> 00:21:03,525
Over here. Come here.
464
00:21:03,526 --> 00:21:05,570
Have I not shown you this before?
465
00:21:06,946 --> 00:21:09,489
Okay, that...
466
00:21:09,490 --> 00:21:12,284
is our family crest,
467
00:21:12,285 --> 00:21:15,455
and behind it is...
468
00:21:18,958 --> 00:21:21,001
... nothing. [SIGHS]
469
00:21:21,002 --> 00:21:23,795
Wait.
470
00:21:23,796 --> 00:21:25,297
[UPLIFTING MUSIC]
471
00:21:25,298 --> 00:21:27,300
[GRUNTS]
472
00:21:30,678 --> 00:21:32,679
Oh, my God.
473
00:21:32,680 --> 00:21:35,683
[CHUCKLING]
474
00:21:39,312 --> 00:21:41,480
The Lazy Lacer.
475
00:21:41,481 --> 00:21:43,357
[WYATT] What's a Lazy Lacer?
476
00:21:43,358 --> 00:21:45,859
This was the brilliant idea
I told your dad about...
477
00:21:45,860 --> 00:21:47,444
[CHUCKLES]
478
00:21:47,445 --> 00:21:49,655
... the one he said was
stupid, but he, uh...
479
00:21:49,656 --> 00:21:51,740
he made it. He...
480
00:21:51,741 --> 00:21:53,241
he built it using my design.
481
00:21:53,242 --> 00:21:55,577
I mean, this... [CHUCKLES] This is it.
482
00:21:55,578 --> 00:21:57,872
And he said that he was sorry.
483
00:22:00,458 --> 00:22:03,752
Yeah, I'm... I'm sorry, too.
484
00:22:03,753 --> 00:22:05,420
I'm sorry he's not here right now,
485
00:22:05,421 --> 00:22:07,548
so I can give him a big ol' bear hug.
486
00:22:11,177 --> 00:22:12,762
I am, too.
487
00:22:14,597 --> 00:22:16,974
How about we hug each
other, huh? Come on.
488
00:22:16,975 --> 00:22:19,351
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
489
00:22:19,352 --> 00:22:21,395
[SNIFFLING]
490
00:22:21,396 --> 00:22:23,772
[BOTH SIGH]
491
00:22:23,773 --> 00:22:26,650
- So what's this thing do?
- I'm glad you asked.
492
00:22:26,651 --> 00:22:28,360
Okay...
493
00:22:28,361 --> 00:22:30,237
you know how everybody wastes
494
00:22:30,238 --> 00:22:32,698
so much time every day
tying their own shoes?
495
00:22:32,699 --> 00:22:34,157
No, not really.
496
00:22:34,158 --> 00:22:35,575
Well, the Lazy Lacer will do it for ya.
497
00:22:35,576 --> 00:22:36,785
Simply take your foot,
498
00:22:36,786 --> 00:22:38,704
put it on the Lazy Lacer pedestal,
499
00:22:38,705 --> 00:22:41,873
and let the Lazy Lacer do its magic.
500
00:22:41,874 --> 00:22:44,418
Push the button and
be ready to be amazed.
501
00:22:44,419 --> 00:22:45,877
[LIGHT CLASSICAL MUSIC]
502
00:22:45,878 --> 00:22:48,881
[DEVICE WHIRRING]
503
00:22:56,806 --> 00:22:59,057
[LAUGHS]
504
00:22:59,058 --> 00:23:02,185
It's nice and slow. Interesting.
505
00:23:02,186 --> 00:23:05,022
Human kind will never have
to tie its own laces again.
506
00:23:05,023 --> 00:23:06,648
Ka-ching! [CHUCKLES]
507
00:23:06,649 --> 00:23:08,233
Come on, let's go show
everyone how it works.
508
00:23:08,234 --> 00:23:09,693
In a few minutes.
509
00:23:09,694 --> 00:23:11,862
It's still working on the first loop.
510
00:23:11,863 --> 00:23:13,739
Almost there.
511
00:23:13,740 --> 00:23:16,868
Yeah, I really thought
it'd go a little faster.
512
00:23:25,251 --> 00:23:27,127
What are you butt-faces looking at?
513
00:23:27,128 --> 00:23:29,921
- Something you want to tell us?
- Yes.
514
00:23:29,922 --> 00:23:32,466
Get away from my bed.
515
00:23:32,467 --> 00:23:34,635
I'm talking about that.
516
00:23:37,722 --> 00:23:39,890
I've never seen that before in my life.
517
00:23:39,891 --> 00:23:41,433
We saw you hide it in the closet.
518
00:23:41,434 --> 00:23:44,728
And the bag says "Dash's bag" on it.
519
00:23:44,729 --> 00:23:46,938
[SIGHS] Fine.
520
00:23:46,939 --> 00:23:49,691
So it's a sunflower. Big deal.
521
00:23:49,692 --> 00:23:51,276
I read about them in Dad's book,
522
00:23:51,277 --> 00:23:53,695
and I decided to grow one on my own.
523
00:23:53,696 --> 00:23:56,407
But why were you hiding it from us?
524
00:23:57,784 --> 00:23:59,701
I figured you guys would laugh at me.
525
00:23:59,702 --> 00:24:02,080
So go ahead and laugh.
526
00:24:03,289 --> 00:24:07,042
No. Actually, I think it's really cool.
527
00:24:07,043 --> 00:24:09,336
- You do?
- [LIAM] I do, too.
528
00:24:09,337 --> 00:24:11,963
Sunflower oil is a growth industry.
529
00:24:11,964 --> 00:24:15,092
You're ground-flooring a
massive investment opportunity.
530
00:24:15,093 --> 00:24:17,677
- You guys want to check it out?
- Nope.
531
00:24:17,678 --> 00:24:19,304
Sure.
532
00:24:19,305 --> 00:24:22,311
[GENTLE MUSIC]
533
00:24:26,479 --> 00:24:28,897
- Hey, Wyatt?
- Yeah?
534
00:24:28,898 --> 00:24:30,690
Tell anyone about this,
535
00:24:30,691 --> 00:24:32,901
and I'm gonna shave off your
eyebrows while you sleep.
536
00:24:32,902 --> 00:24:35,570
[CHUCKLES]
537
00:24:35,571 --> 00:24:37,572
[UPBEAT MUSIC]
538
00:24:37,573 --> 00:24:39,199
Here you go, ma'am.
539
00:24:39,200 --> 00:24:40,493
Enjoy.
540
00:24:43,454 --> 00:24:45,080
I'd be careful if I was you.
541
00:24:45,081 --> 00:24:47,249
They're coming, and they're super angry.
542
00:24:47,250 --> 00:24:49,709
- Who's coming?
- And why are they angry?
543
00:24:49,710 --> 00:24:50,752
Bobby and Tyra.
544
00:24:50,753 --> 00:24:52,129
Apparently their customers
545
00:24:52,130 --> 00:24:53,797
didn't appreciate
lemonade made with salt.
546
00:24:53,798 --> 00:24:55,590
- Who knew?
- See ya!
547
00:24:55,591 --> 00:24:59,719
Oh, no, I forgot to tell them
I swapped their sugar with salt.
548
00:24:59,720 --> 00:25:02,889
Tell my brain to tell my legs to run!
549
00:25:02,890 --> 00:25:04,683
No, no, please...
550
00:25:04,684 --> 00:25:06,935
- [BOTH GRUNT]
- [AIR WHISTLING]
551
00:25:06,936 --> 00:25:08,645
- [EGGS SMACKING]
- [BOTH SCREAM]
552
00:25:08,646 --> 00:25:13,692
[MAN SINGING] ♪ See ♪
553
00:25:13,693 --> 00:25:16,154
♪ See what you have done ♪
554
00:25:18,239 --> 00:25:23,243
♪ We look ♪
555
00:25:23,244 --> 00:25:27,373
♪ Upon the sea, my wayward son ♪
556
00:25:28,583 --> 00:25:30,917
♪ You got caught with two
hands in the sugar bowl ♪
557
00:25:30,918 --> 00:25:34,755
♪ And your pocket's full of plums ♪
558
00:25:36,841 --> 00:25:40,635
♪ Are you gonna stand there
and look me in the eye? ♪
559
00:25:40,636 --> 00:25:42,638
♪ Are you gonna run? ♪
560
00:25:44,891 --> 00:25:48,685
♪ So I pause to reflect upon ♪
561
00:25:48,686 --> 00:25:52,731
♪ What I might've done ♪
562
00:25:52,732 --> 00:25:57,861
♪ I think I'd cut and run ♪
563
00:25:57,862 --> 00:26:01,198
♪ Ooh ♪
564
00:26:01,199 --> 00:26:08,206
♪ I'd run ♪
565
00:26:09,957 --> 00:26:12,751
♪ Oh, but tell me ♪
566
00:26:12,752 --> 00:26:15,463
♪ Didn't we have fun? ♪
567
00:26:17,798 --> 00:26:20,258
♪ Just think of all the bad ideas ♪
568
00:26:20,259 --> 00:26:27,266
♪ might've never seen the sun ♪
569
00:26:27,267 --> 00:26:32,267
- Synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -
40068
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