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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,220 --> 00:00:05,350 ♪ Rock music ♪ 2 00:00:05,350 --> 00:00:06,220 You missed it, didn't ya? 3 00:00:06,220 --> 00:00:07,680 You don't know what happened last week. 4 00:00:07,680 --> 00:00:09,810 You want me to tell you? Give me 100 bucks. 5 00:00:09,810 --> 00:00:11,560 Come on, 100 bucks, I'll tell you what ha-- 6 00:00:11,560 --> 00:00:13,470 okay, 50 bucks! You make a good living! 7 00:00:13,470 --> 00:00:15,020 Give me some fucking money! 8 00:00:15,020 --> 00:00:16,390 You want to know what happened or not? 9 00:00:16,390 --> 00:00:17,890 Well then, fuck you. I'm not telling you. 10 00:00:17,890 --> 00:00:20,520 It's my goal to get you all 11 00:00:20,520 --> 00:00:22,560 safely across the border into Canada. 12 00:00:22,560 --> 00:00:23,520 - Do you see anybody? - No, I don't see-- 13 00:00:23,520 --> 00:00:26,350 hello. Wrong side of the border, boys, eh? 14 00:00:26,350 --> 00:00:29,020 You can find your own rich dude to control. 15 00:00:29,020 --> 00:00:31,060 I am past my prime whoring years. 16 00:00:31,060 --> 00:00:33,310 Top ten places to look for rich dudes. 17 00:00:33,310 --> 00:00:35,310 Number one: High-end pubs. 18 00:00:35,310 --> 00:00:37,100 We're taking you sugar-daddy shopping. 19 00:00:37,100 --> 00:00:38,890 I saw you took the "for rent" sign down. 20 00:00:38,890 --> 00:00:40,430 It's about time I got 21 00:00:40,430 --> 00:00:41,980 something of my own for a change. 22 00:00:41,980 --> 00:00:42,850 You're pretty damn intriguing. 23 00:00:42,850 --> 00:00:45,140 How intriguing? 24 00:00:45,140 --> 00:00:46,770 There was, uh, an accident at my building, 25 00:00:46,770 --> 00:00:48,850 one of the roofer guys fell off the roof. 26 00:00:48,850 --> 00:00:51,180 - Is he okay? - I think he broke his ankle. 27 00:00:51,180 --> 00:00:53,600 If there's anything that I can do to help. 28 00:00:53,600 --> 00:00:54,390 Thank you. 29 00:00:54,390 --> 00:00:56,680 What, youens still? 30 00:00:56,680 --> 00:00:58,180 I can't stop picturing him in an orange jumpsuit 31 00:00:58,180 --> 00:00:59,220 for the rest of his life. 32 00:00:59,220 --> 00:01:00,270 You're a good fucking friend, 33 00:01:00,270 --> 00:01:01,930 but you can't fix everything. 34 00:01:01,930 --> 00:01:03,390 You still on that Bible shit? 35 00:01:03,390 --> 00:01:04,680 Yeah, I'm proving to my online haters 36 00:01:04,680 --> 00:01:06,020 that Jesus is a fag hag. 37 00:01:06,020 --> 00:01:07,890 Another gaycorcism's going down. 38 00:01:07,890 --> 00:01:10,140 Gotta gather the kids. 39 00:01:10,140 --> 00:01:11,890 - Who are you? - I'm his girlfriend. 40 00:01:11,890 --> 00:01:14,060 - Check this out. - Wow. 41 00:01:14,060 --> 00:01:16,560 You're yelling at me right now! 42 00:01:16,560 --> 00:01:17,730 Because you're being crazy! 43 00:01:17,730 --> 00:01:19,640 Yes, I'll marry you! 44 00:01:19,640 --> 00:01:20,310 Fucking hell yes! 45 00:01:20,310 --> 00:01:21,310 Oh, my god... 46 00:01:29,680 --> 00:01:31,730 ♪ Rock music ♪ 47 00:01:36,470 --> 00:01:39,890 ♪ think of all the luck you got ♪ 48 00:01:39,890 --> 00:01:43,060 ♪ know that it's not for naught ♪ 49 00:01:43,060 --> 00:01:45,180 ♪ you were beaming once before ♪ 50 00:01:45,180 --> 00:01:50,600 ♪ but it's not like that anymore ♪ 51 00:01:50,600 --> 00:01:52,890 ♪ what is this downside ♪ 52 00:01:52,890 --> 00:01:57,100 ♪ that you speak of? ♪ 53 00:01:57,100 --> 00:01:59,470 ♪ What is this feeling ♪ 54 00:01:59,470 --> 00:02:03,980 ♪ you're so sure of? ♪ 55 00:02:11,020 --> 00:02:13,270 ♪ Round up the friends you got ♪ 56 00:02:13,270 --> 00:02:17,180 ♪ know that they're not for naught ♪ 57 00:02:17,180 --> 00:02:20,640 ♪ you were willing once before ♪ 58 00:02:20,640 --> 00:02:24,100 ♪ but it's not like that anymore ♪ 59 00:02:24,100 --> 00:02:28,140 ♪ what is this downside ♪ 60 00:02:28,140 --> 00:02:31,020 ♪ that you speak of? ♪ 61 00:02:31,020 --> 00:02:32,930 ♪ What is this feeling ♪ 62 00:02:32,930 --> 00:02:37,520 ♪ you're so sure of? ♪ 63 00:02:39,060 --> 00:02:40,470 ♪ Upbeat rock music ♪ 64 00:02:40,470 --> 00:02:42,560 Ah, you're, uh, still at it. 65 00:02:42,560 --> 00:02:43,930 Yeah, I'm trying to figure out 66 00:02:43,930 --> 00:02:45,390 where all the gay-hating churches are. 67 00:02:45,390 --> 00:02:47,350 There's like one in every neighborhood. 68 00:02:47,350 --> 00:02:48,850 Homophobia's back in style. 69 00:02:48,850 --> 00:02:50,520 Not for long. 70 00:02:50,520 --> 00:02:52,310 I've got more kids coming for a meeting tonight. 71 00:02:52,310 --> 00:02:54,930 - Youens still in jail? - Yeah. 72 00:02:54,930 --> 00:02:57,730 Yeah, I'm actually gonna go check on him later today. 73 00:02:57,730 --> 00:02:59,470 Oh. 74 00:03:01,930 --> 00:03:04,730 Hey, they've got a retirement calculator. 75 00:03:04,730 --> 00:03:06,520 I fucking love the Internet. 76 00:03:06,520 --> 00:03:10,140 I'll roll over my 401k from lumber lawn and lighting. 77 00:03:10,140 --> 00:03:13,890 And then I add my estimated yearly earnings. 78 00:03:13,890 --> 00:03:14,980 What are you doing, frank? 79 00:03:14,980 --> 00:03:16,310 Planning my retirement. 80 00:03:16,310 --> 00:03:18,520 Time to reflect on my accomplishments 81 00:03:18,520 --> 00:03:21,520 and to bask in the spoils of a life well-lived. 82 00:03:21,520 --> 00:03:22,930 You mean leech off your kids 83 00:03:22,930 --> 00:03:24,810 and drink booze out of a backpack? 84 00:03:24,810 --> 00:03:25,680 You guys, farhad found me 85 00:03:25,680 --> 00:03:28,270 a temp job that pays 40 bucks an hour! 86 00:03:28,270 --> 00:03:30,060 - Oh, yeah? - Some nighttime welding gig. 87 00:03:30,060 --> 00:03:32,520 I don't know, nighttime welding? Sounds kind of sketchy, debs. 88 00:03:32,520 --> 00:03:34,980 Took me two weeks to make 300 bucks walking dogs. 89 00:03:34,980 --> 00:03:36,560 I can handle sketchy. 90 00:03:36,560 --> 00:03:39,560 Expenses? Alcohol and drugs is non-negotiable. 91 00:03:39,560 --> 00:03:42,100 Clothing? Yes, the occasional golf shirt 92 00:03:42,100 --> 00:03:44,310 or swimwear for leisurely retirement pursuits. 93 00:03:44,310 --> 00:03:46,350 Hola, hola, good morning. 94 00:03:46,350 --> 00:03:48,730 No mortgage... 95 00:03:48,730 --> 00:03:50,810 Hola, mi cielito. Como estás? 96 00:03:50,810 --> 00:03:52,560 No rent... 97 00:03:52,560 --> 00:03:55,270 Are you ready to have a nice day with your abuelita? 98 00:03:58,890 --> 00:04:01,060 I'll change you. 99 00:04:03,890 --> 00:04:06,180 - Good morning, boo. - Did you make all this? 100 00:04:06,180 --> 00:04:08,220 Yes. For you, bae. 101 00:04:08,220 --> 00:04:10,220 I am going to cook for you every day, 102 00:04:10,220 --> 00:04:12,470 and dinner too, and then blow jobs for dessert. 103 00:04:12,470 --> 00:04:14,640 I'm going to be the best fucking wife. 104 00:04:16,060 --> 00:04:17,430 The age I'd like to retire, 105 00:04:17,430 --> 00:04:18,600 based on my current age? 106 00:04:18,600 --> 00:04:21,180 Well... they're identical, so. 107 00:04:21,680 --> 00:04:24,140 I-- 108 00:04:24,140 --> 00:04:26,470 w--this makes no sense. 109 00:04:26,470 --> 00:04:27,680 Let me see. 110 00:04:27,680 --> 00:04:30,890 Come on. 111 00:04:30,890 --> 00:04:35,270 All right, you need... 23 grand annually to retire. 112 00:04:35,270 --> 00:04:37,980 And you are short by about... 113 00:04:37,980 --> 00:04:39,680 22 grand. 114 00:04:39,680 --> 00:04:40,930 Sounds right to me. 115 00:04:40,930 --> 00:04:41,640 Oh, fuck that. 116 00:04:41,640 --> 00:04:46,020 I've got engagement presents! 117 00:04:47,560 --> 00:04:49,890 The vibrations will lift up your follicles 118 00:04:49,890 --> 00:04:52,310 so that the blades cut below your skin. 119 00:04:52,310 --> 00:04:53,810 Thank you. 120 00:04:53,810 --> 00:04:55,810 And a Nintendo 3ds for Liam. 121 00:04:55,810 --> 00:04:58,140 Dope. 122 00:04:58,140 --> 00:05:00,640 And a zen garden 123 00:05:00,640 --> 00:05:04,220 with a tiny, little sand rake for you. 124 00:05:04,220 --> 00:05:07,520 And, um, a fitbit for Ian. 125 00:05:07,520 --> 00:05:08,890 Sweet. 126 00:05:08,890 --> 00:05:11,600 And... hot rollers for you. 127 00:05:11,600 --> 00:05:13,270 Cool. 128 00:05:13,270 --> 00:05:15,930 And for you, my sweet, hot bitch... 129 00:05:15,930 --> 00:05:17,470 I found it. 130 00:05:17,470 --> 00:05:19,560 What is it? 131 00:05:21,180 --> 00:05:24,310 Is that blood? 132 00:05:24,310 --> 00:05:25,430 Is that your blood? 133 00:05:25,430 --> 00:05:26,980 Yeah. It's your blood now. 134 00:05:26,980 --> 00:05:28,890 You possess me, and vice versa. 135 00:05:28,890 --> 00:05:30,310 Here. Come here. 136 00:05:30,310 --> 00:05:32,020 I'll try not to Nick an artery. 137 00:05:32,020 --> 00:05:34,350 Gross. 138 00:05:40,140 --> 00:05:42,850 - Hi. - Hi. 139 00:05:42,850 --> 00:05:43,810 Nice color. 140 00:05:43,810 --> 00:05:45,310 It's called "dangerous robot." 141 00:05:45,310 --> 00:05:48,520 I'm doing the bathroom in liquid kitty. 142 00:05:48,520 --> 00:05:50,770 What happened to just "blue"? 143 00:05:50,770 --> 00:05:52,680 Blue... is not badass. 144 00:05:52,680 --> 00:05:56,180 Well, neither is liquid kitty; It sounds like a dyke bar. 145 00:05:56,180 --> 00:05:57,890 Why don't you just paint it "wet pussy"? 146 00:05:57,890 --> 00:05:59,310 Benjamin Moore didn't have that one. 147 00:05:59,310 --> 00:06:02,180 It took me forever to choose. 148 00:06:02,180 --> 00:06:04,430 What is my taste, even? 149 00:06:04,430 --> 00:06:05,850 Ghetto chic. 150 00:06:05,850 --> 00:06:07,600 That's by necessity, not choice. 151 00:06:07,600 --> 00:06:08,180 Well, you're asking the wrong gal. 152 00:06:08,180 --> 00:06:10,350 Mel handles this shit. 153 00:06:10,350 --> 00:06:11,140 And her style's like... 154 00:06:11,140 --> 00:06:13,680 Resort meets brothel. 155 00:06:13,680 --> 00:06:16,220 That's perfect for a nursery. 156 00:06:16,220 --> 00:06:18,180 You guys start picking out cribs? 157 00:06:18,180 --> 00:06:20,470 Crib, singular. 158 00:06:20,470 --> 00:06:23,220 We're down a fetus. I miscarried. 159 00:06:23,220 --> 00:06:24,470 Oh, shit. 160 00:06:24,470 --> 00:06:25,770 It's okay. 161 00:06:25,770 --> 00:06:27,470 I mean, yeah, it sucks, but 162 00:06:27,470 --> 00:06:28,470 we hadn't figured we'd both get pregnant. 163 00:06:28,470 --> 00:06:31,100 Least now I can drink. Got any beer? 164 00:06:31,100 --> 00:06:34,520 Yeah, go help yourself. 165 00:06:34,520 --> 00:06:36,060 Well, how's Mel taking it? 166 00:06:36,060 --> 00:06:38,390 I haven't told her yet. 167 00:06:38,390 --> 00:06:42,390 Maybe I'll eat smoked salmon and raw eggs in front of her, 168 00:06:42,390 --> 00:06:43,890 and see if she notices. 169 00:06:48,470 --> 00:06:49,730 "Hey, stranger. 170 00:06:49,730 --> 00:06:51,350 Picking up some chairs for a client. 171 00:06:51,350 --> 00:06:53,730 Wanna join and grab some furniture for your flat?" 172 00:06:53,730 --> 00:06:55,270 - Is that Ford? - Mm-hmm. 173 00:06:55,270 --> 00:06:56,180 Say yes. He's like a furniture savant. 174 00:06:56,180 --> 00:06:58,390 So the last time I saw him, 175 00:06:58,390 --> 00:07:01,600 we kissed, and then he threw me out. 176 00:07:01,600 --> 00:07:03,270 Well, said he had to work. 177 00:07:03,270 --> 00:07:06,350 I have never waited this long for someone to bang me. 178 00:07:06,350 --> 00:07:09,430 It's kind of fun, weirdly. 179 00:07:09,430 --> 00:07:10,600 For now. 180 00:07:10,600 --> 00:07:12,640 Guy better be an animal in bed. 181 00:07:12,640 --> 00:07:14,140 I wouldn't know. 182 00:07:14,140 --> 00:07:16,350 I closed my eyes and pictured Scarlett Johansson. 183 00:07:16,350 --> 00:07:17,980 But I've heard glowing accounts. 184 00:07:17,980 --> 00:07:19,100 Well, if I find out before I'm 40, 185 00:07:19,100 --> 00:07:20,060 I'll let you know. 186 00:07:24,850 --> 00:07:26,560 Any bites yet? 187 00:07:26,560 --> 00:07:29,430 Maybe we should change her profile description. 188 00:07:29,430 --> 00:07:30,810 What does it say now? 189 00:07:30,810 --> 00:07:32,770 "Sassy Russian ex-prostitute 190 00:07:32,770 --> 00:07:34,730 seeks single geriatric male 191 00:07:34,730 --> 00:07:37,560 with piles of money and a terminal illness." 192 00:07:37,560 --> 00:07:38,890 Subtle. 193 00:07:38,890 --> 00:07:41,140 Guy named Gerald seems interested. 194 00:07:41,140 --> 00:07:43,350 Luxury cigar importer. 195 00:07:43,350 --> 00:07:46,470 Hey, guess what we're doing. 196 00:07:46,470 --> 00:07:48,390 I can find my own rich husband. 197 00:07:48,390 --> 00:07:50,930 We know that you can, but if a wealthy cigar importer 198 00:07:50,930 --> 00:07:52,770 comes into the alibi tonight, it won't kill you 199 00:07:52,770 --> 00:07:54,390 to smile and have a drink. 200 00:07:54,390 --> 00:07:55,310 What is the point of smiling? 201 00:07:55,310 --> 00:07:58,220 Make other people feel good. 202 00:07:58,220 --> 00:08:00,270 I make people feel good other ways. 203 00:08:00,270 --> 00:08:00,980 Yes, you do. 204 00:08:00,980 --> 00:08:02,640 But there are some situations 205 00:08:02,640 --> 00:08:04,430 where hand jobs are not appropriate. 206 00:08:10,220 --> 00:08:12,890 American mid-century modern. 207 00:08:12,890 --> 00:08:14,810 Mm. 208 00:08:14,810 --> 00:08:16,600 That's cool. 209 00:08:16,600 --> 00:08:20,220 Reference to the Danish design movement of the 1950s. 210 00:08:26,140 --> 00:08:29,020 Try it. 211 00:08:32,310 --> 00:08:33,680 - It's comfy. - Mm-hmm. 212 00:08:33,680 --> 00:08:37,850 - Not sure it's me though. - Says who? 213 00:08:37,850 --> 00:08:40,810 You get to choose that. That's what design is for. 214 00:08:40,810 --> 00:08:43,520 Decide who you want to be. 215 00:08:43,520 --> 00:08:45,640 Speaking Greek 216 00:08:49,140 --> 00:08:53,930 - speaking Greek - speaking Greek 217 00:08:53,930 --> 00:08:54,980 speaks Greek 218 00:08:54,980 --> 00:08:56,850 thank you. 219 00:08:58,470 --> 00:09:02,100 - What the fuck was that? - Uh, Greek. 220 00:09:02,100 --> 00:09:04,520 I lived in a monastery in Macedonia for a while. 221 00:09:04,520 --> 00:09:05,980 Of course you did. 222 00:09:05,980 --> 00:09:08,770 And I just scored you a $2,000 chair for 450, 223 00:09:08,770 --> 00:09:09,730 which is insane. 224 00:09:09,730 --> 00:09:14,520 I'm not gonna spend $450 on a chair. 225 00:09:14,520 --> 00:09:15,640 It's not a chair. 226 00:09:15,640 --> 00:09:18,220 It's an investment in your future self. 227 00:09:20,350 --> 00:09:21,640 How much that building cost you? 228 00:09:21,640 --> 00:09:24,390 It was a lot more than I had. 229 00:09:24,390 --> 00:09:27,310 Why'd you buy it then? 230 00:09:29,640 --> 00:09:30,770 You're good. 231 00:09:39,470 --> 00:09:41,770 - Hi. - Hi. Inmate's name? 232 00:09:41,770 --> 00:09:43,560 It's, uh, Clyde youens. 233 00:09:43,560 --> 00:09:47,310 Y-o-u-e-n-s. 234 00:09:52,270 --> 00:09:55,560 I'm sorry, he's deceased. 235 00:09:58,060 --> 00:09:59,770 What? 236 00:09:59,770 --> 00:10:02,890 There was an incident. He didn't survive. 237 00:10:04,850 --> 00:10:06,640 W--when? 238 00:10:09,560 --> 00:10:11,100 Tuesday. 239 00:10:11,100 --> 00:10:14,270 Next of kin was contacted and the body was claimed. 240 00:10:15,390 --> 00:10:16,020 ♪ Somber alternative music ♪ 241 00:10:16,020 --> 00:10:18,270 Next. 242 00:10:23,890 --> 00:10:24,600 - Hi. - Hey. 243 00:10:24,600 --> 00:10:28,350 Here for paddy, 4629... 244 00:11:01,470 --> 00:11:03,850 They're kicking him out of the hospital in the morning. 245 00:11:03,850 --> 00:11:06,180 And how is this my problem, huh? 246 00:11:06,180 --> 00:11:08,350 He fell. I didn't push him. 247 00:11:08,350 --> 00:11:10,430 He worked six hours; He'll get his 150 bucks 248 00:11:10,430 --> 00:11:12,020 when the job is done and I get paid. 249 00:11:12,020 --> 00:11:13,470 That's how this works. 250 00:11:13,470 --> 00:11:14,680 We're not leaving this spot 251 00:11:14,680 --> 00:11:15,680 until we get out our money. 252 00:11:15,680 --> 00:11:16,680 Whatever! 253 00:11:19,020 --> 00:11:19,930 Sorry to bother you. 254 00:11:19,930 --> 00:11:22,810 Do you mind if my kids use your bathroom? 255 00:11:27,220 --> 00:11:29,430 Sure. 256 00:11:30,060 --> 00:11:30,930 We love you, Ian! 257 00:11:30,930 --> 00:11:32,930 There he is. Look, it's Ian. 258 00:11:32,930 --> 00:11:34,810 - Ian! Ian! - Can you come to our... 259 00:11:34,810 --> 00:11:36,520 - What's up, guys? - My boyfriend is gonna flip. 260 00:11:36,520 --> 00:11:38,770 He can't stop talking about you. 261 00:11:38,770 --> 00:11:40,850 Could you, uh, record a message for him? 262 00:11:40,850 --> 00:11:42,220 His name's Nico James. 263 00:11:42,220 --> 00:11:44,140 Mr. Gallagher, hi, I'm reverend Murphy. 264 00:11:44,140 --> 00:11:46,020 I'm a pastor at Trinity and life Evangelical-- 265 00:11:46,020 --> 00:11:47,140 oh, we don't need any more ministers, 266 00:11:47,140 --> 00:11:49,470 but if you want to give money, that'd be cool-- 267 00:11:49,470 --> 00:11:50,930 I'm not here for me. 268 00:11:50,930 --> 00:11:52,390 Some folks from my church wanted to meet you. 269 00:11:52,390 --> 00:11:54,020 This is Alice. 270 00:11:54,020 --> 00:11:56,470 Her parents put her through conversion therapy twice. 271 00:11:56,470 --> 00:11:59,930 She has something for you. 272 00:11:59,930 --> 00:12:00,930 Go on, honey. 273 00:12:08,770 --> 00:12:10,640 Wow. 274 00:12:10,640 --> 00:12:12,020 That, uh, tha-- 275 00:12:12,020 --> 00:12:14,220 you drew this? Thank you. 276 00:12:14,220 --> 00:12:16,350 Can you, like, heal people? 277 00:12:16,350 --> 00:12:18,100 I'm a paramedic, so... 278 00:12:18,100 --> 00:12:19,930 Well, when are you gonna perform your next miracle? 279 00:12:19,930 --> 00:12:22,810 Oh, no, I don't perform miracles. 280 00:12:22,810 --> 00:12:24,020 Do you--I'm sorry, I only saw the one video. 281 00:12:24,020 --> 00:12:27,060 - What is your ministry, again? - I don't have one. 282 00:12:27,060 --> 00:12:28,810 I just kind of show up 283 00:12:28,810 --> 00:12:30,680 to these conversion things and argue with assholes. 284 00:12:30,680 --> 00:12:32,770 I... lead meetings at this youth center if you guys want-- 285 00:12:32,770 --> 00:12:34,140 my boyfriend needs help. 286 00:12:34,140 --> 00:12:37,310 Could you talk to him? 287 00:12:51,470 --> 00:12:54,600 Oh, well, lookee here, Mr. Popularity. 288 00:12:54,600 --> 00:12:55,470 - Mr. Viral sensation. - Okay. 289 00:12:55,470 --> 00:12:58,600 Mr. King of the queens. 290 00:12:58,600 --> 00:13:00,600 Kind of hoping they'll lose interest. 291 00:13:00,600 --> 00:13:02,220 Yeah, well, there's more and more of them every day. 292 00:13:02,220 --> 00:13:03,100 They're blocking the garage door. 293 00:13:03,100 --> 00:13:04,980 I'm gonna have to park the ambulance 294 00:13:04,980 --> 00:13:06,930 outside by the curb so I don't accidentally 295 00:13:06,930 --> 00:13:07,980 run somebody over. 296 00:13:07,980 --> 00:13:09,810 What do they even want? 297 00:13:09,810 --> 00:13:10,850 Uh-- 298 00:13:11,730 --> 00:13:13,560 guess they just want to be seen by... 299 00:13:13,560 --> 00:13:15,430 Someone who sees 'em back. 300 00:13:15,430 --> 00:13:16,470 Oh, please. 301 00:13:16,470 --> 00:13:18,930 Looks to me like they want to douse you in syrup 302 00:13:18,930 --> 00:13:21,520 and slurp you up with a spoon. 303 00:13:22,980 --> 00:13:24,140 Could be down for that. 304 00:13:26,640 --> 00:13:30,140 That chair suits you. 305 00:13:30,140 --> 00:13:31,810 Might be the first time I bought something 306 00:13:31,810 --> 00:13:32,850 I didn't actually need. 307 00:13:32,850 --> 00:13:35,680 Beautiful, functional everyday objects 308 00:13:35,680 --> 00:13:37,100 should be affordable. 309 00:13:37,100 --> 00:13:39,020 My idea of affordable is looting the house 310 00:13:39,020 --> 00:13:41,930 of the neighbor who just od'd so I don't gotta buy new shit. 311 00:13:41,930 --> 00:13:45,180 I've got an old coffee maker that needs a loving home. 312 00:13:45,180 --> 00:13:47,810 Ooh. Now you're talking. 313 00:13:47,810 --> 00:13:50,100 Maybe I'll come by your place later? 314 00:13:50,100 --> 00:13:51,930 - Pick it up? - I got plans tonight. 315 00:13:51,930 --> 00:13:53,220 I'll drop it off tomorrow. 316 00:13:58,680 --> 00:13:59,850 How long have they been in there? 317 00:13:59,850 --> 00:14:01,270 About 20 minutes. 318 00:14:01,270 --> 00:14:01,850 Are they bathing? 319 00:14:01,850 --> 00:14:04,680 I think they might be. 320 00:14:04,680 --> 00:14:05,890 Why would they do that? 321 00:14:05,890 --> 00:14:08,020 You think they're homeless? 322 00:14:21,850 --> 00:14:24,270 Jesus, you startled me. 323 00:14:24,270 --> 00:14:26,680 I didn't think anybody else had keys. 324 00:14:26,680 --> 00:14:28,060 I'm sorry, who are you? 325 00:14:28,060 --> 00:14:30,770 Oh, I'm lip. Um. 326 00:14:30,770 --> 00:14:33,140 Phillip Gallagher. 327 00:14:33,140 --> 00:14:34,180 Who are you? 328 00:14:34,180 --> 00:14:35,730 I'm--I'm Tabitha, his daughter. 329 00:14:35,730 --> 00:14:38,850 I--um, are you a student? 330 00:14:38,850 --> 00:14:40,220 No, I was. 331 00:14:40,220 --> 00:14:43,060 I was helping him after the accident. 332 00:14:44,730 --> 00:14:48,770 Accident? I thought he was arrested for a dui. 333 00:14:48,770 --> 00:14:50,100 You know what? It's okay. 334 00:14:50,100 --> 00:14:52,560 I don't even want to know. 335 00:14:52,560 --> 00:14:54,020 Jesus Christ, this week. 336 00:14:57,310 --> 00:14:59,470 You--you do know he's dead, right? 337 00:14:59,470 --> 00:15:01,730 What happened? 338 00:15:01,730 --> 00:15:03,850 He had, uh, a seizure. 339 00:15:03,850 --> 00:15:06,890 Alcohol withdrawal. Hit his head. 340 00:15:06,890 --> 00:15:10,270 - Jesus. - Yeah. 341 00:15:10,270 --> 00:15:11,520 There's a memorial service tomorrow, 342 00:15:11,520 --> 00:15:15,020 and the students are welcome to say a few words if you like. 343 00:15:15,020 --> 00:15:16,850 Oh, no one told me. 344 00:15:16,850 --> 00:15:19,100 The school said they sent out an email. 345 00:15:19,100 --> 00:15:22,220 I-i-I'm sorry, who are you again? 346 00:15:22,220 --> 00:15:24,680 I picked up your dad... From jail, 347 00:15:24,680 --> 00:15:26,220 after the dui. 348 00:15:26,220 --> 00:15:28,520 I bought him groceries. I-- 349 00:15:28,520 --> 00:15:30,270 did he pay you? 350 00:15:30,270 --> 00:15:33,020 No, he didn't pay me. 351 00:15:33,020 --> 00:15:36,890 He... Covered the cost of my rehab. 352 00:15:36,890 --> 00:15:38,310 And he got me an internship. 353 00:15:38,310 --> 00:15:39,350 He-he tried to convince the school 354 00:15:39,350 --> 00:15:40,640 to revoke my expulsion. 355 00:15:40,640 --> 00:15:43,270 He listened to me. He... 356 00:15:43,270 --> 00:15:45,140 Listened to me about everything. 357 00:15:45,140 --> 00:15:48,850 Well, glad you were so well-parented by my dad. 358 00:15:51,060 --> 00:15:53,100 Look, I-I have this covered. 359 00:15:53,100 --> 00:15:55,810 You can leave your key on the way out. 360 00:15:55,810 --> 00:15:57,520 Thanks. 361 00:15:57,520 --> 00:15:59,930 Sure. 362 00:16:15,020 --> 00:16:16,520 Here you are, sir. 363 00:16:16,520 --> 00:16:18,560 On the house. 364 00:16:18,560 --> 00:16:20,640 - Oh, thank you. - Of course. 365 00:16:20,640 --> 00:16:22,810 Our elders are a precious resource. 366 00:16:22,810 --> 00:16:25,430 Thanks for staying alive. 367 00:16:25,430 --> 00:16:28,180 I'll drink to that. 368 00:16:28,180 --> 00:16:30,930 ♪ 'Cause ♪ 369 00:16:30,930 --> 00:16:31,600 ♪ you dance... ♪ 370 00:16:36,810 --> 00:16:37,890 My, my. 371 00:16:37,890 --> 00:16:40,980 You must be Svetlana. 372 00:16:40,980 --> 00:16:42,850 Wow. What a knockout. 373 00:16:42,850 --> 00:16:45,430 Good evening, ma'am. 374 00:16:45,430 --> 00:16:47,730 May I procure you a cocktail? 375 00:16:47,730 --> 00:16:49,980 Vodka. 376 00:16:49,980 --> 00:16:52,180 Your profile was, uh, 377 00:16:52,180 --> 00:16:54,180 quite provocative. 378 00:16:54,180 --> 00:16:57,520 You were an escort for a time, weren't you? 379 00:16:57,520 --> 00:16:58,930 Hand whore. 380 00:16:58,930 --> 00:17:00,680 Occasional cocksucking and fucking. 381 00:17:00,680 --> 00:17:01,850 What is your name? 382 00:17:01,850 --> 00:17:04,520 - Gerald. - "Gerald." 383 00:17:04,520 --> 00:17:07,020 Sounds like bald man drowning in hot soup. 384 00:17:07,020 --> 00:17:08,180 Huh? 385 00:17:08,180 --> 00:17:10,980 There you are, m'lady. 386 00:17:10,980 --> 00:17:12,350 What would it run me if, uh, 387 00:17:12,350 --> 00:17:14,220 you and I were to take a walk out to my vehicle 388 00:17:14,220 --> 00:17:16,680 and you were to keep me company for 30 minutes? 389 00:17:20,020 --> 00:17:21,680 $900,000. 390 00:17:25,730 --> 00:17:27,390 Forty bucks. 391 00:17:27,390 --> 00:17:30,810 And you take off your shoes so I don't get any... 392 00:17:30,810 --> 00:17:33,220 Dirt on my seat. 393 00:17:33,220 --> 00:17:35,140 Oh! 394 00:17:36,430 --> 00:17:39,770 ♪ You got hotness ♪ 395 00:17:39,770 --> 00:17:40,350 ♪ to get your body... ♪ 396 00:17:40,350 --> 00:17:41,890 Could've gone worse. 397 00:17:41,890 --> 00:17:45,430 Don't know how. 398 00:17:45,430 --> 00:17:48,810 It sucks when people use god as an excuse for their own hatred, 399 00:17:48,810 --> 00:17:52,890 and when it's your family, it's the worst. 400 00:17:52,890 --> 00:17:55,100 Look, 401 00:17:55,100 --> 00:17:56,810 I know you don't want to hurt your parents, 402 00:17:56,810 --> 00:17:58,220 but sometimes they forget. 403 00:17:58,220 --> 00:18:01,930 God creates us all in his own image. 404 00:18:01,930 --> 00:18:04,770 We gotta jog their memory. 405 00:18:04,770 --> 00:18:07,180 If they believe that god hates the same people as they do, 406 00:18:07,180 --> 00:18:10,470 well, they're creating god in their image. 407 00:18:10,470 --> 00:18:13,270 That's right. That's right. 408 00:18:13,270 --> 00:18:16,520 We all have a holy spirit. 409 00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:18,180 We're all holy. 410 00:18:18,180 --> 00:18:20,270 We're all divine... 411 00:18:20,270 --> 00:18:21,600 Jesus, listen to that. 412 00:18:21,600 --> 00:18:24,100 Oh, I know. He's like a prophet. 413 00:18:24,100 --> 00:18:25,520 And he's super hot too. 414 00:18:25,520 --> 00:18:27,810 Like hot gay Jesus. 415 00:18:30,930 --> 00:18:33,100 "Hot gay Jesus." 416 00:18:33,100 --> 00:18:36,430 Bet we can make money off of that. 417 00:18:36,430 --> 00:18:37,770 How? 418 00:18:37,770 --> 00:18:40,060 Ring the right bell for the right causes, 419 00:18:40,060 --> 00:18:42,020 the guilt-ridden pry open their wallets. 420 00:18:42,020 --> 00:18:43,020 It's pavlovian. 421 00:18:43,020 --> 00:18:47,140 Righteousness is very marketable. 422 00:18:47,140 --> 00:18:49,270 What's that all about? 423 00:18:49,270 --> 00:18:51,640 Uh, just a queer religious rebellion 424 00:18:51,640 --> 00:18:53,310 led by your gay brother. No biggie. 425 00:18:53,310 --> 00:18:55,810 We all have the Trinity inside of us. 426 00:18:55,810 --> 00:18:57,470 I'd like to read a passage from romans now. 427 00:18:57,470 --> 00:18:59,600 ♪ Rousing jazzy music ♪ 428 00:18:59,600 --> 00:19:03,060 - Who are we hiding from? - The union workers. 429 00:19:03,060 --> 00:19:04,220 We gotta wait till they leave for the night. 430 00:19:04,220 --> 00:19:05,100 - How do we get paid? - Cash. 431 00:19:05,100 --> 00:19:07,850 We meet tomorrow, location tba, 432 00:19:07,850 --> 00:19:08,640 and they'll text the address. 433 00:19:08,640 --> 00:19:11,730 My god. This is so exciting. 434 00:19:16,890 --> 00:19:18,930 Everybody, let's go, let's go. 435 00:19:24,600 --> 00:19:26,520 OMG. That was amazing. 436 00:19:26,520 --> 00:19:27,930 Your brother is, like, everything. 437 00:19:27,930 --> 00:19:29,520 And they all ate my popovers. 438 00:19:29,520 --> 00:19:31,520 God, I am really fucking happy. 439 00:19:31,520 --> 00:19:32,350 - Are you? - Yeah. 440 00:19:32,350 --> 00:19:34,180 But are you, like, really fucking happy 441 00:19:34,180 --> 00:19:36,350 or are you just, like, meh? 442 00:19:36,350 --> 00:19:37,020 I'm really fuckin' happy. 443 00:19:37,020 --> 00:19:40,430 Yay. 444 00:19:40,430 --> 00:19:43,640 - Hey, what you writing? - A list. 445 00:19:43,640 --> 00:19:44,770 "Swiss army knife, stun gun, 446 00:19:44,770 --> 00:19:46,180 retractable night stick," what-what is this shit? 447 00:19:46,180 --> 00:19:48,430 List for school. Give it back. 448 00:19:48,430 --> 00:19:50,520 Wait, military school? 449 00:19:50,520 --> 00:19:52,270 You said that you weren't going back. 450 00:19:52,270 --> 00:19:53,850 We're engaged! 451 00:19:53,850 --> 00:19:55,680 I never said I wasn't going back. 452 00:19:55,680 --> 00:19:57,100 I've been packing my duffel bag all week. 453 00:19:57,100 --> 00:19:58,310 Oh, I'm sorry. 454 00:19:58,310 --> 00:19:59,640 I guess I've been just too busy 455 00:19:59,640 --> 00:20:00,520 buying your fuckin' family shit 456 00:20:00,520 --> 00:20:02,850 and-and making a fucking life for us. 457 00:20:02,850 --> 00:20:05,310 Meanwhile, you've just been shitting all over it. 458 00:20:05,310 --> 00:20:07,770 Why did we even bother getting engaged? 459 00:20:07,770 --> 00:20:10,470 Why did I fucking cut myself for you? 460 00:20:10,470 --> 00:20:12,520 We'll make it work; You'll come visit. 461 00:20:12,520 --> 00:20:13,930 - We'll scout motels. - Motels? 462 00:20:13,930 --> 00:20:16,390 What am I, a prostitute? 463 00:20:16,390 --> 00:20:18,270 No, I never said that! 464 00:20:18,270 --> 00:20:19,560 You are so full of shit, Carl! 465 00:20:19,560 --> 00:20:23,020 - You don't even love me! - Of course I love you! 466 00:20:23,020 --> 00:20:24,390 Well, you don't love me enough! 467 00:20:24,390 --> 00:20:26,220 Then how do I prove it to you? 468 00:20:26,220 --> 00:20:27,980 Um, you're not supposed to ask 469 00:20:27,980 --> 00:20:30,470 how you prove to love somebody, you should just prove it. 470 00:20:30,470 --> 00:20:31,520 Well, obviously it's not fuckin' enough. 471 00:20:31,520 --> 00:20:33,680 Uh, yeah, because your real goal is 472 00:20:33,680 --> 00:20:34,810 to go back to military school. 473 00:20:34,810 --> 00:20:37,930 Of course that doesn't make me think that you love me! 474 00:20:40,020 --> 00:20:43,850 ♪ Somber ambient music ♪ 475 00:20:51,850 --> 00:20:53,520 I want you to stay here 476 00:20:53,520 --> 00:20:55,020 and be my husband! 477 00:20:56,180 --> 00:20:57,640 Reverend murph, 478 00:20:57,640 --> 00:20:58,270 this is my sister Fiona. 479 00:20:58,270 --> 00:21:01,470 - Pleasure. - Hi. 480 00:21:01,470 --> 00:21:03,770 I'm super impressed, dude. 481 00:21:03,770 --> 00:21:04,680 The only way I can get that many people 482 00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:07,520 is if I offer free pizza. 483 00:21:07,520 --> 00:21:09,600 No, it's just 'cause of that video. 484 00:21:09,600 --> 00:21:12,220 No. You got something, man. 485 00:21:12,220 --> 00:21:13,770 Bunch of folks who couldn't make it 486 00:21:13,770 --> 00:21:15,350 already messaged me about the next one. 487 00:21:15,350 --> 00:21:17,220 Oh, I definitely can't fit more people in here 488 00:21:17,220 --> 00:21:18,730 than I did tonight. 489 00:21:18,730 --> 00:21:20,770 Would you feel weird about using our parish hall? 490 00:21:20,770 --> 00:21:22,980 No pressure. 491 00:21:22,980 --> 00:21:24,020 Just shoot me a text when you decide, 492 00:21:24,020 --> 00:21:27,770 I'll send you the address. 493 00:21:27,770 --> 00:21:29,390 Thanks for the beer. 494 00:21:35,560 --> 00:21:38,350 How's the new place? 495 00:21:38,350 --> 00:21:40,140 Small. Quiet. 496 00:21:40,140 --> 00:21:43,810 - I bought a chair. - Oh. 497 00:21:43,810 --> 00:21:46,730 Your, uh, fellowship thing 498 00:21:46,730 --> 00:21:49,560 seems to be doing well. 499 00:21:49,560 --> 00:21:51,600 First Gallagher to become famous for something 500 00:21:51,600 --> 00:21:53,470 other than larceny or assault. 501 00:21:53,470 --> 00:21:55,770 Ha, yeah. 502 00:21:55,770 --> 00:21:57,140 It's, uh... 503 00:21:57,140 --> 00:21:59,430 It's getting pretty out of hand. 504 00:21:59,430 --> 00:22:02,310 I got people showing up at my home, 505 00:22:02,310 --> 00:22:05,390 church place, work. 506 00:22:05,390 --> 00:22:07,560 I had to shut down my Facebook page. 507 00:22:07,560 --> 00:22:09,930 So why not quit if you hate it so much? 508 00:22:09,930 --> 00:22:12,020 I don't. 509 00:22:12,020 --> 00:22:15,520 Just...trying to manage it. 510 00:22:15,520 --> 00:22:18,930 She's back to flipping out again about military school. 511 00:22:18,930 --> 00:22:21,770 Says I can't go 'cause we're engaged. 512 00:22:21,770 --> 00:22:22,850 Wait, you're actually engaged? 513 00:22:22,850 --> 00:22:25,180 - I thought that was a joke. - Don't marry her. 514 00:22:25,180 --> 00:22:27,680 I can't lose her. 515 00:22:27,680 --> 00:22:29,020 She's fun, hot, 516 00:22:29,020 --> 00:22:30,350 rich, hot. 517 00:22:30,350 --> 00:22:31,680 She loves me. 518 00:22:31,680 --> 00:22:33,020 No one's ever loved me this hard. 519 00:22:33,020 --> 00:22:34,770 Do not marry her, okay? 520 00:22:34,770 --> 00:22:35,850 She is a fucking psycho. 521 00:22:35,850 --> 00:22:38,140 Marry her. 522 00:22:38,140 --> 00:22:41,470 Hear me and heed me. 523 00:22:41,470 --> 00:22:45,350 Do not let that frothing piece of lady meat out of your sight. 524 00:22:45,350 --> 00:22:48,100 She has a trust fund. 525 00:22:48,100 --> 00:22:49,640 Get joint checking. 526 00:22:49,640 --> 00:22:52,770 And whatever you do, do not sign a prenup. 527 00:22:52,770 --> 00:22:54,850 Hey. 528 00:22:54,850 --> 00:22:57,770 It's gay Jesus. 529 00:22:58,560 --> 00:23:00,310 Can I have this? 530 00:23:21,140 --> 00:23:23,140 Hey! Scabs! 531 00:23:24,470 --> 00:23:26,060 - Go, go! - Fuckin' run! 532 00:23:26,060 --> 00:23:26,640 - Oh, fuck! - Get back here! 533 00:23:26,640 --> 00:23:28,770 Debbie! Debbie, run! 534 00:23:28,770 --> 00:23:30,390 ♪ Heavy rock music ♪ 535 00:23:30,390 --> 00:23:33,060 Come here, you motherfucker! 536 00:24:42,020 --> 00:24:44,350 Hey! 537 00:24:44,350 --> 00:24:44,930 How ya feeling? 538 00:24:44,930 --> 00:24:47,060 Like shit. 539 00:24:47,060 --> 00:24:49,810 Sorry to hear that. 540 00:24:49,810 --> 00:24:51,560 Your boss emailed me. 541 00:24:51,560 --> 00:24:53,020 He finished the job, sent me an invoice. 542 00:24:53,020 --> 00:24:56,470 Probably want to track him down so you can get paid. 543 00:24:56,470 --> 00:24:59,430 Thanks for the heads up. 544 00:25:05,100 --> 00:25:07,810 Okay. You did really well last night. 545 00:25:07,810 --> 00:25:10,930 However, we need to tone down the rage a little. 546 00:25:10,930 --> 00:25:12,850 You're not gonna get anywhere if your date thinks 547 00:25:12,850 --> 00:25:15,310 you want to murder him the second he ties the knot. 548 00:25:15,310 --> 00:25:17,180 - What if I do? - Great question. 549 00:25:17,180 --> 00:25:21,310 Which brings us to part a of our plan: Etiquette. 550 00:25:23,520 --> 00:25:25,470 Rich guys are old school. 551 00:25:25,470 --> 00:25:28,850 They want a lady to be a lady. 552 00:25:28,850 --> 00:25:31,100 A man wants to feel powerful. 553 00:25:31,100 --> 00:25:32,470 Really powerful. 554 00:25:32,470 --> 00:25:34,390 So let him dominate the conversation. 555 00:25:34,390 --> 00:25:36,730 Act like he's totally fascinating. 556 00:25:36,730 --> 00:25:38,180 I cannot do this. 557 00:25:38,180 --> 00:25:39,180 Okay, this brings us to part b of our plan. 558 00:25:42,890 --> 00:25:46,180 This is a tiny microphone. Attach it to your shirt. 559 00:25:46,180 --> 00:25:49,020 ♪ Mischievous jazzy music ♪ 560 00:25:51,060 --> 00:25:54,100 This is a tiny earpiece. Put this in your ear. 561 00:25:54,100 --> 00:25:56,390 Oh, come on, svet. You're Russian. 562 00:25:56,390 --> 00:25:58,560 This is spy shit. It's in your DNA. 563 00:26:02,470 --> 00:26:04,890 Testing, testing. Can you hear me? 564 00:26:04,890 --> 00:26:06,180 You are right there. 565 00:26:06,180 --> 00:26:07,930 I meant in the thingy. 566 00:26:11,310 --> 00:26:12,140 Can you hear me? 567 00:26:12,140 --> 00:26:13,680 Yes. 568 00:26:13,680 --> 00:26:15,220 Okay. Do everything I say. 569 00:26:15,220 --> 00:26:17,980 Scratch your nose. 570 00:26:17,980 --> 00:26:20,730 Tuck your hair behind your ear. 571 00:26:21,220 --> 00:26:22,770 Excellent. 572 00:26:22,770 --> 00:26:26,180 Say, "Kevin ball has a sexy voice." 573 00:26:26,180 --> 00:26:27,220 Why should I lie? 574 00:26:27,220 --> 00:26:30,980 Say it. 575 00:26:30,980 --> 00:26:33,430 Kevin ball has a sexy voice. 576 00:26:33,430 --> 00:26:34,890 Mmm. 577 00:26:38,270 --> 00:26:39,980 What the fuck was that last night? 578 00:26:39,980 --> 00:26:42,060 I never said it was risk-free. 579 00:26:42,060 --> 00:26:43,520 You also never said 580 00:26:43,520 --> 00:26:45,310 we'd be running for our lives. 581 00:26:45,310 --> 00:26:47,220 Why'd they hire us instead of hiring their own guys? 582 00:26:47,220 --> 00:26:48,600 Scabs are non-union. 583 00:26:48,600 --> 00:26:51,680 Union guys get overtime, pension, health. 584 00:26:51,680 --> 00:26:53,770 So we're screwing over a union we want to join someday? 585 00:26:53,770 --> 00:26:55,600 If we don't take the work, someone else will. 586 00:26:55,600 --> 00:26:58,020 It's wrong and it's dangerous. 587 00:26:58,020 --> 00:26:58,640 I'm never being a scab again. 588 00:27:02,140 --> 00:27:04,180 Hey, just got a tip for another gig. 589 00:27:04,180 --> 00:27:06,270 Pays even more. 590 00:27:06,270 --> 00:27:09,680 Five hundred. 591 00:27:09,680 --> 00:27:10,810 I'm in. 592 00:27:10,810 --> 00:27:13,850 ♪ Upbeat rock music ♪ 593 00:27:19,180 --> 00:27:22,100 Hi. 594 00:27:22,100 --> 00:27:23,640 What you got there? 595 00:27:23,640 --> 00:27:25,980 Free appliance. 596 00:27:25,980 --> 00:27:27,980 Works great if you're patient. 597 00:27:27,980 --> 00:27:30,020 Is that a shitty, old percolator? 598 00:27:30,020 --> 00:27:32,060 It's Italian. It's art. 599 00:27:34,520 --> 00:27:35,930 Hey. 600 00:27:35,930 --> 00:27:37,980 What are you guys still doing here? 601 00:27:37,980 --> 00:27:38,890 We can't leave. 602 00:27:38,890 --> 00:27:41,430 Rodney won't fit in the car with his leg. 603 00:27:41,430 --> 00:27:44,470 Plus, our ac is busted. 604 00:27:44,470 --> 00:27:46,180 You know anybody with an SUV? 605 00:27:46,180 --> 00:27:48,850 Or I can take you somewhere. Where you headed? 606 00:27:52,020 --> 00:27:54,270 Is there, uh, some family you can stay with 607 00:27:54,270 --> 00:27:55,350 or maybe an old neighbor? 608 00:27:55,350 --> 00:27:57,680 Oh, we've been looking into some charity housing, 609 00:27:57,680 --> 00:27:58,980 but they all have a wait list. 610 00:27:58,980 --> 00:28:01,100 I know someone who works with local shelters. 611 00:28:01,100 --> 00:28:04,680 I can ask him if he maybe knows a place that could take you. 612 00:28:04,680 --> 00:28:08,310 - Wow, you'd do that? - Sure. 613 00:28:09,020 --> 00:28:12,020 ♪ Rock music ♪ 614 00:28:31,220 --> 00:28:32,020 Hey. 615 00:28:32,020 --> 00:28:33,350 What the fuck? 616 00:28:33,350 --> 00:28:35,020 Hey, baby. 617 00:28:35,020 --> 00:28:35,890 You cut up all my uniforms? 618 00:28:35,890 --> 00:28:37,810 Well, I weighed out the pros and cons, 619 00:28:37,810 --> 00:28:40,470 and I made a decision for our family. 620 00:28:40,470 --> 00:28:42,270 I think that it's better for everyone 621 00:28:42,270 --> 00:28:43,600 that you don't go back to school. 622 00:28:43,600 --> 00:28:45,560 We have a wedding to plan. 623 00:28:45,560 --> 00:28:47,060 Kassidi. 624 00:28:47,060 --> 00:28:47,730 Don't say my name like that. 625 00:28:47,730 --> 00:28:50,560 - Kassidi-- - do not 626 00:28:50,560 --> 00:28:52,470 say my name like that, I mean it, Carl. 627 00:28:52,470 --> 00:28:53,850 Kassidi, this is not a joke! 628 00:28:53,850 --> 00:28:56,890 I am going back to military school. 629 00:28:56,890 --> 00:28:58,430 I hate you! 630 00:28:58,430 --> 00:29:00,470 Hey! 631 00:29:00,470 --> 00:29:02,020 Fuck. Wait! 632 00:29:02,020 --> 00:29:03,020 You can't leave me! I'll die! 633 00:29:03,020 --> 00:29:05,640 Hey, what the fuck! You're not gonna die! 634 00:29:05,640 --> 00:29:07,220 We're gonna see each other like once a week! 635 00:29:07,220 --> 00:29:08,390 - I can't! - Open up the door! 636 00:29:08,390 --> 00:29:10,680 - I need you! - What the fuck? You kidding me? 637 00:29:10,680 --> 00:29:12,100 This engagement is bullshit! 638 00:29:12,100 --> 00:29:12,890 What? What the fuck? 639 00:29:12,890 --> 00:29:15,350 I paid like 100 bucks for that! 640 00:29:15,350 --> 00:29:16,140 - Fuck you! - Come on! 641 00:29:16,140 --> 00:29:17,850 Fuck you! Fuck you! 642 00:29:17,850 --> 00:29:21,770 Oh, my god! What do you want me to do? 643 00:29:21,770 --> 00:29:23,930 Marry me before you leave, dumbass. 644 00:29:23,930 --> 00:29:25,310 You love me, right? 645 00:29:25,310 --> 00:29:26,930 Then what's the point in waiting? 646 00:29:26,930 --> 00:29:29,180 Okay, fine. 647 00:29:29,180 --> 00:29:31,180 - Today? - Yeah, sure. 648 00:29:32,350 --> 00:29:34,810 ♪ I was in so deep ♪ 649 00:29:34,810 --> 00:29:36,770 But--do you have a fake ID? 650 00:29:36,770 --> 00:29:38,640 Yeah.- 651 00:29:38,640 --> 00:29:40,730 ♪ my same ole story ♪ 652 00:29:40,730 --> 00:29:41,770 ♪ and the weight is all ♪ 653 00:29:41,770 --> 00:29:44,220 ♪ the weight is all on me ♪ 654 00:29:44,220 --> 00:29:45,890 - Hey. - Hey. 655 00:29:45,890 --> 00:29:47,270 Where's Ian? 656 00:29:47,270 --> 00:29:48,980 I don't know. I haven't seen him. 657 00:29:48,980 --> 00:29:50,640 Fuck. 658 00:29:50,640 --> 00:29:52,140 He was supposed to be here like an hour ago to help set up. 659 00:29:52,140 --> 00:29:55,390 Doing this thing about careers in emergency services 660 00:29:55,390 --> 00:29:56,430 for our life skills program. 661 00:29:56,430 --> 00:29:59,810 Shit-ton of people signed because of him, but... 662 00:29:59,810 --> 00:30:00,310 Whatever. 663 00:30:00,310 --> 00:30:02,600 What's up? 664 00:30:02,600 --> 00:30:04,140 Uh, one of the guys 665 00:30:04,140 --> 00:30:05,180 who was working on my roof got hurt. 666 00:30:05,180 --> 00:30:06,890 He's gonna be out of work for a few months, 667 00:30:06,890 --> 00:30:10,140 and his family's living out of a car. 668 00:30:10,140 --> 00:30:10,980 I was wondering if you might know any 669 00:30:10,980 --> 00:30:12,810 family shelters that could take him? 670 00:30:12,810 --> 00:30:16,310 Um, I might, actually. Follow me. 671 00:30:19,470 --> 00:30:22,100 So, uh, what's your take on this whole, uh, 672 00:30:22,100 --> 00:30:24,850 Ian ambushing all those ministers? 673 00:30:24,850 --> 00:30:26,470 Uh, 674 00:30:26,470 --> 00:30:29,100 not really sure what to make of it. 675 00:30:29,100 --> 00:30:30,100 Ah, yeah. 676 00:30:30,100 --> 00:30:32,560 I mean, part of me is psyched 677 00:30:32,560 --> 00:30:34,310 that he's helping people, but 678 00:30:34,310 --> 00:30:36,520 another part is, I don't know, 679 00:30:36,520 --> 00:30:38,850 kind of bummed that I have to crowbar my way into his life 680 00:30:38,850 --> 00:30:40,930 if I want to see him. 681 00:30:40,930 --> 00:30:42,850 Oh. 682 00:30:42,850 --> 00:30:44,730 This place is decent. 683 00:30:44,730 --> 00:30:45,470 I'll call over and get everything squared away 684 00:30:45,470 --> 00:30:46,470 and let you know. 685 00:30:46,470 --> 00:30:48,680 - Thanks. - Yeah. 686 00:30:48,680 --> 00:30:50,520 And, hey, if you see Ian, please... 687 00:30:50,520 --> 00:30:51,430 - Yes. - Thank you. 688 00:30:51,430 --> 00:30:52,470 Will do. 689 00:30:52,470 --> 00:30:54,390 - Thanks. - Yeah. 690 00:31:00,520 --> 00:31:02,680 The fuck is this, frank? 691 00:31:02,680 --> 00:31:05,180 Son, I don't think I've articulated 692 00:31:05,180 --> 00:31:08,100 how impressed I am with your recent endeavors. 693 00:31:08,100 --> 00:31:10,180 I knew you were talented, but, uh... 694 00:31:10,180 --> 00:31:13,100 "The church of gay Jesus." Is this a jumbo shirt? 695 00:31:13,100 --> 00:31:14,560 To reach the masses, 696 00:31:14,560 --> 00:31:16,850 you've got to embrace merchandising 697 00:31:16,850 --> 00:31:18,220 to take your brand to the next level. 698 00:31:18,220 --> 00:31:23,060 Uh, how about t-shirts proudly displaying your message? 699 00:31:23,060 --> 00:31:24,560 Well, I-I don't have a church. 700 00:31:24,560 --> 00:31:25,890 And I'm not fuckin' Jesus. 701 00:31:25,890 --> 00:31:26,980 Tongue in cheek, son. 702 00:31:26,980 --> 00:31:31,350 When you repurpose a-an iconic logo 703 00:31:31,350 --> 00:31:32,560 for the-the sake of kitsch, 704 00:31:32,560 --> 00:31:37,390 you present an ironic critique of American consumerism. 705 00:31:37,390 --> 00:31:39,310 And if that logo 706 00:31:39,310 --> 00:31:41,560 just happens to resemble a... 707 00:31:41,560 --> 00:31:43,470 Giant, throbbing penis, 708 00:31:43,470 --> 00:31:45,180 what could be more counterculture? 709 00:31:45,180 --> 00:31:48,140 It looks like a hot dog. And the lettering sucks. 710 00:31:48,140 --> 00:31:51,060 Revolutions don't come wrapped in a cute ribbon. 711 00:31:51,060 --> 00:31:53,850 You want to bring down power structures? 712 00:31:53,850 --> 00:31:54,890 You want to get in the face of people 713 00:31:54,890 --> 00:31:57,140 who are peddling corroded ideals? 714 00:31:57,140 --> 00:32:01,600 You need a uniform that screams authenticity. 715 00:32:01,600 --> 00:32:04,100 We didn't pay Chinese factory orphans 716 00:32:04,100 --> 00:32:04,770 three cents an hour to make these. 717 00:32:04,770 --> 00:32:08,270 No, this is our living room. 718 00:32:08,270 --> 00:32:10,100 Our hands. Our sweat. 719 00:32:10,100 --> 00:32:11,770 Talk about grassroots. 720 00:32:13,600 --> 00:32:15,930 I have a meeting tonight at Trinity and life Evangelical. 721 00:32:15,930 --> 00:32:18,430 You can hawk your shit there, but 722 00:32:18,430 --> 00:32:20,100 everything you make has to go to Trevor's kids. 723 00:32:20,100 --> 00:32:25,140 Oh, come on! This is my retirement fund. 724 00:32:25,140 --> 00:32:26,930 Twenty percent. 725 00:32:26,930 --> 00:32:28,890 Thirty? 726 00:32:28,890 --> 00:32:32,180 Okay, 95 percent, and we appreciate your business. 727 00:32:33,640 --> 00:32:37,140 And this has been a rough few years. 728 00:32:38,470 --> 00:32:39,810 Needless to say, it hasn't been that easy 729 00:32:39,810 --> 00:32:41,980 being around my dad. 730 00:32:41,980 --> 00:32:43,730 But my favorite memory of him 731 00:32:43,730 --> 00:32:45,390 is this thing that he would do. 732 00:32:45,390 --> 00:32:47,100 So he would be in his office, 733 00:32:47,100 --> 00:32:52,270 hunched over paperwork, and I'd knock. 734 00:32:52,270 --> 00:32:55,310 And he'd look up, confused. 735 00:32:55,310 --> 00:32:56,980 And then, boom. 736 00:32:56,980 --> 00:33:01,430 It's the--the biggest, warmest smile. 737 00:33:01,430 --> 00:33:05,140 That is the version of my dad that I'm going to remember. 738 00:33:05,140 --> 00:33:07,350 And I'm grateful for every moment 739 00:33:07,350 --> 00:33:09,350 that I had with him 740 00:33:09,350 --> 00:33:11,100 when he was just him. 741 00:33:11,100 --> 00:33:12,980 ♪ Soft somber rock music ♪ 742 00:33:12,980 --> 00:33:16,390 You hear about these professors who go the extra mile 743 00:33:16,390 --> 00:33:19,060 to help a student. 744 00:33:19,060 --> 00:33:22,520 But what youens did for me went above and beyond that. 745 00:33:22,520 --> 00:33:24,100 Got me my first real job. 746 00:33:24,100 --> 00:33:26,850 Listened to me bitch about my family. 747 00:33:26,850 --> 00:33:27,930 He was there for me. 748 00:33:27,930 --> 00:33:29,350 He got me internships, 749 00:33:29,350 --> 00:33:31,180 wrote dozens of letters of recommendation, 750 00:33:31,180 --> 00:33:35,020 personally called the Dean at carnegie mellon 751 00:33:35,020 --> 00:33:37,350 to get me into the robotics doctoral program. 752 00:33:37,350 --> 00:33:40,350 Told me once, he wished he'd been a poet. 753 00:33:40,350 --> 00:33:43,180 And he showed me something he'd written. 754 00:33:43,180 --> 00:33:45,730 Said I was the only person 755 00:33:45,730 --> 00:33:48,980 he trusted enough to show. 756 00:33:48,980 --> 00:33:50,520 That poem was awful. 757 00:33:51,600 --> 00:33:53,430 And no matter how busy he was, 758 00:33:53,430 --> 00:33:56,520 youens always made time to talk to me. 759 00:33:56,520 --> 00:33:58,020 He helped me with whatever I needed, 760 00:33:58,020 --> 00:34:03,350 listen, offer advice, wise counsel. 761 00:34:03,350 --> 00:34:05,180 Day or night, it didn't matter, 762 00:34:05,180 --> 00:34:08,100 when you called or knocked on his door, 763 00:34:08,100 --> 00:34:11,600 he always answered. 764 00:34:11,600 --> 00:34:13,310 Always. 765 00:34:13,310 --> 00:34:15,220 ♪ You could ever really love me... ♪ 766 00:34:15,220 --> 00:34:18,890 He was like a father to me. 767 00:34:18,890 --> 00:34:19,930 I honestly don't know where I'd be without him today. 768 00:34:19,930 --> 00:34:23,180 ♪ It's in your head... ♪ 769 00:34:23,180 --> 00:34:26,680 He invested his time and energy to make sure 770 00:34:26,680 --> 00:34:28,890 I didn't become a total fuck-up. 771 00:34:28,890 --> 00:34:30,100 He didn't have to. 772 00:34:31,560 --> 00:34:33,180 I'm still not sure why he did. 773 00:34:33,180 --> 00:34:37,390 Okay. My friend found you a place. 774 00:34:37,390 --> 00:34:38,890 It's a family shelter. 775 00:34:38,890 --> 00:34:40,390 They'll have a room for you in two days. 776 00:34:40,390 --> 00:34:42,850 Girls, we've got a place to live. 777 00:34:42,850 --> 00:34:45,890 They can take us in two days, you said? 778 00:34:45,890 --> 00:34:47,520 Mm-hmm. 779 00:34:47,520 --> 00:34:50,220 Oh, we've got the tarp if it rains again. 780 00:34:59,310 --> 00:35:01,390 Why don't you just stay here for two nights? 781 00:35:01,390 --> 00:35:03,100 Really? 782 00:35:03,100 --> 00:35:05,470 Yeah. Not a problem. 783 00:35:05,470 --> 00:35:07,600 I'll just, uh, I'll crash at my old place. 784 00:35:07,600 --> 00:35:09,930 Oh, my god, Fiona. 785 00:35:09,930 --> 00:35:13,100 Thank you. You're a lifesaver. 786 00:35:13,100 --> 00:35:16,270 ♪ Upbeat alternative music ♪ 787 00:35:16,270 --> 00:35:19,680 We should go get a blanket and a bottle of champagne, 788 00:35:19,680 --> 00:35:23,060 go in the park, and lay in the grass as man and wife, 789 00:35:23,060 --> 00:35:25,810 and let the moon and the stars bless our union. 790 00:35:29,470 --> 00:35:30,980 Cute! 791 00:35:30,980 --> 00:35:33,640 Now serving: 103. 792 00:35:33,640 --> 00:35:34,140 Oh! 793 00:35:34,140 --> 00:35:35,890 Yay! That's us. 794 00:35:35,890 --> 00:35:37,600 Okay, come on. 795 00:35:43,640 --> 00:35:45,520 All set. 796 00:35:45,520 --> 00:35:50,310 Your marriage license is valid for 60 days in cook county only. 797 00:35:50,310 --> 00:35:51,930 There's a one-day waiting period 798 00:35:51,930 --> 00:35:53,640 before the license becomes effective. 799 00:35:53,640 --> 00:35:57,020 Wait. So we can't get married today? 800 00:35:57,020 --> 00:36:00,020 You can get married at this exact time tomorrow. 801 00:36:00,020 --> 00:36:02,810 What the fuck? This sucks. 802 00:36:12,730 --> 00:36:14,890 I look like a fucking first lady. 803 00:36:14,890 --> 00:36:15,980 Here. 804 00:36:15,980 --> 00:36:17,100 Go cross your legs 805 00:36:17,100 --> 00:36:19,730 and pretend to be captivated. 806 00:36:21,930 --> 00:36:24,520 Smokey to bobcat. 807 00:36:24,520 --> 00:36:25,350 Do you hear me? Over. 808 00:36:27,560 --> 00:36:29,470 What are you guys up to? 809 00:36:29,470 --> 00:36:31,600 We're trying to get Svetlana married off to a rich dude. 810 00:36:31,600 --> 00:36:34,180 So... 811 00:36:34,180 --> 00:36:35,180 You just gave 'em your place, just like that? 812 00:36:35,180 --> 00:36:38,430 What else was I supposed to do? 813 00:36:38,430 --> 00:36:41,180 Man, I was really digging my quiet mornings 814 00:36:41,180 --> 00:36:43,140 away from Gallagher chaos. 815 00:36:43,140 --> 00:36:44,850 And it's extra bad right now 816 00:36:44,850 --> 00:36:46,310 'cause of Ian's gay Messiah shit. 817 00:36:46,310 --> 00:36:49,390 He should read pope Leo the 13th's 818 00:36:49,390 --> 00:36:52,060 encyclical on property rights. 819 00:36:52,060 --> 00:36:53,770 I'll pass it on. 820 00:36:55,730 --> 00:36:57,770 You know, whiskey is actually 821 00:36:57,770 --> 00:37:00,350 clear when it comes off the still. 822 00:37:00,350 --> 00:37:02,430 It gets the caramel color from the barrel-- 823 00:37:02,430 --> 00:37:05,270 you know, I'm just-- I'm just gonna say this. 824 00:37:05,270 --> 00:37:06,730 Sometimes it feels like 825 00:37:06,730 --> 00:37:08,890 it doesn't even matter that I'm sitting here. 826 00:37:08,890 --> 00:37:10,810 I know all the places you've lived. 827 00:37:10,810 --> 00:37:11,850 I know all the languages you speak. 828 00:37:11,850 --> 00:37:15,350 I've met your exes, your baby mamas, your spawn. 829 00:37:15,350 --> 00:37:18,100 And yet, you have never asked one question about me. 830 00:37:18,100 --> 00:37:20,430 Did you know that I became 831 00:37:20,430 --> 00:37:23,020 legal guardian of my siblings when I was 23? 832 00:37:23,020 --> 00:37:24,600 Or that I dropped out of high school, 833 00:37:24,600 --> 00:37:26,680 but then I got back and I got my ged? 834 00:37:26,680 --> 00:37:27,390 Yes, actually, I did. 835 00:37:29,890 --> 00:37:32,350 And I know you did it to convince your genius brother 836 00:37:32,350 --> 00:37:35,180 who's a recovering alcoholic to stay in college. 837 00:37:35,180 --> 00:37:37,560 I know you got left at the altar by your junkie fiancé 838 00:37:37,560 --> 00:37:39,270 with whom you were very much in love. 839 00:37:39,270 --> 00:37:42,140 - How? - 'Cause I ask around. 840 00:37:42,140 --> 00:37:44,640 There's some other stuff I know. 841 00:37:44,640 --> 00:37:46,350 You're fiercely protective of your family. 842 00:37:46,350 --> 00:37:47,930 You're generous. 843 00:37:47,930 --> 00:37:48,980 Like today, for example, 844 00:37:48,980 --> 00:37:52,680 you gave your apartment to a homeless family. 845 00:37:52,680 --> 00:37:55,100 You are so very much yourself. 846 00:37:55,100 --> 00:37:57,430 You don't even have to try. 847 00:38:00,680 --> 00:38:03,520 And frankly, you scare the fuckin' shit out of me. 848 00:38:25,020 --> 00:38:27,770 It's him. It's him. 849 00:38:27,770 --> 00:38:29,390 Svet, svet. 850 00:38:29,390 --> 00:38:32,140 The buzzard is in the tuba. The buzzard is in the tuba. 851 00:38:32,140 --> 00:38:34,640 - The what? - I have no idea. 852 00:38:34,640 --> 00:38:36,730 I've never done this before. 853 00:38:40,310 --> 00:38:43,020 What's she saying? 854 00:38:44,770 --> 00:38:46,470 I can't hear anything. 855 00:38:46,470 --> 00:38:50,310 I can't hear anything. We never tested the microphone. 856 00:38:51,310 --> 00:38:53,560 All right, well, she needs to relax. 857 00:38:53,560 --> 00:38:56,390 Tell her to lean in a little. 858 00:38:56,390 --> 00:38:59,270 Svetlana, lean in a little. 859 00:38:59,270 --> 00:39:00,350 Too far. Too far. 860 00:39:00,350 --> 00:39:02,060 Too far. Too far. 861 00:39:03,390 --> 00:39:05,180 Take a sip of your drink. 862 00:39:05,180 --> 00:39:08,640 Sip, not gulp. 863 00:39:08,640 --> 00:39:10,100 Tell her to-to ask him about something. 864 00:39:10,100 --> 00:39:12,180 All right. All right. 865 00:39:12,180 --> 00:39:13,180 All right, svet. 866 00:39:13,180 --> 00:39:15,520 Ask him about his mother. 867 00:39:15,520 --> 00:39:16,980 No, not his mother. 868 00:39:16,980 --> 00:39:19,390 Ask him about his favorite sports teams. 869 00:39:19,390 --> 00:39:20,640 Allergies-- what the hell 870 00:39:20,640 --> 00:39:22,810 do people talk about on dates? 871 00:39:22,810 --> 00:39:25,520 Did she just drop her earpiece in her drink? 872 00:39:29,020 --> 00:39:30,470 Oh, no. 873 00:39:30,470 --> 00:39:32,640 She's gonna grab his cock, isn't she? 874 00:39:37,100 --> 00:39:39,430 Mm-hmm. Called that one. 875 00:39:39,430 --> 00:39:40,890 T-shirts! 876 00:39:40,890 --> 00:39:42,390 Each garment has been worn by the man himself. 877 00:39:42,390 --> 00:39:43,430 - And blessed! - T-shirts. 878 00:39:43,430 --> 00:39:44,220 $50 suggested donation. 879 00:39:44,220 --> 00:39:46,640 The white one? Okay. Thank you. 880 00:39:46,640 --> 00:39:48,060 T-shirts, t-shirts. 881 00:39:48,060 --> 00:39:49,020 T-shirts, get your t-shirts here! 882 00:39:49,020 --> 00:39:50,730 Nice turnout. 883 00:39:50,730 --> 00:39:53,220 Only half of them are regulars. 884 00:39:53,220 --> 00:39:54,680 You did great. 885 00:39:54,680 --> 00:39:56,350 I just sat there while people talked about 886 00:39:56,350 --> 00:39:57,770 how horribly they'd been treated, 887 00:39:57,770 --> 00:39:59,770 by family, co-workers... 888 00:39:59,770 --> 00:40:01,730 Can you please sign this, please? 889 00:40:01,730 --> 00:40:03,350 - ...strangers. - Thank you. 890 00:40:03,350 --> 00:40:06,390 Sometimes that's all they need. 891 00:40:06,390 --> 00:40:08,180 Tomorrow's our weekly service... 892 00:40:08,180 --> 00:40:09,470 - Thanks so much. - ...Where we invite speakers 893 00:40:09,470 --> 00:40:11,140 to come up and discuss how to turn 894 00:40:11,140 --> 00:40:13,390 personal pain into positive action. 895 00:40:13,390 --> 00:40:16,180 We call it "a night of good grief." 896 00:40:16,180 --> 00:40:18,470 The name is silly, but the idea isn't. 897 00:40:18,470 --> 00:40:19,980 You up for it? 898 00:40:19,980 --> 00:40:21,850 Well... 899 00:40:21,850 --> 00:40:25,770 I don't...Know what to say that hasn't already been said. 900 00:40:25,770 --> 00:40:26,730 You say it again. 901 00:40:26,730 --> 00:40:29,180 It can't be said enough, not until queer kids 902 00:40:29,180 --> 00:40:31,100 stop being told there's something wrong with them. 903 00:40:31,100 --> 00:40:33,730 It was so worth it. 904 00:40:42,430 --> 00:40:45,520 ♪ Brooding alternative music ♪ 905 00:41:08,520 --> 00:41:12,270 ♪ Solid as a stone ♪ 906 00:41:12,270 --> 00:41:15,310 ♪ all is almost lost ♪ 907 00:41:15,310 --> 00:41:19,020 ♪ and it starts to show ♪ 908 00:41:19,020 --> 00:41:23,640 ♪ and it's home but it's gone ♪ 909 00:41:28,890 --> 00:41:30,180 Fuck! 910 00:41:33,020 --> 00:41:35,270 ♪ Tear down your ♪ 911 00:41:35,270 --> 00:41:37,980 ♪ suffering ♪ 912 00:41:37,980 --> 00:41:40,600 ♪ bolt ♪ 913 00:41:40,600 --> 00:41:42,520 ♪ by ♪ 914 00:41:42,520 --> 00:41:45,980 ♪ bolt ♪ 915 00:42:00,060 --> 00:42:01,180 Hey. 916 00:42:01,180 --> 00:42:03,020 - Hm? - Hey. 917 00:42:03,020 --> 00:42:05,350 We need to talk. 918 00:42:05,350 --> 00:42:07,430 What? What? 919 00:42:07,430 --> 00:42:09,640 You gotta promise not to freak out. 920 00:42:09,640 --> 00:42:11,310 I promise. 921 00:42:11,310 --> 00:42:14,020 Okay. First of all. 922 00:42:14,020 --> 00:42:16,100 You're, like, the best thing that's ever happened to me 923 00:42:16,100 --> 00:42:17,470 like, by like a bazillion. 924 00:42:17,470 --> 00:42:20,810 But when we were at the clerk's office, 925 00:42:20,810 --> 00:42:23,220 and she said we had to wait... 926 00:42:23,220 --> 00:42:25,060 I was relieved. 927 00:42:25,060 --> 00:42:28,270 A little. 928 00:42:28,270 --> 00:42:30,520 'Cause I feel like we rushed into this. 929 00:42:30,520 --> 00:42:32,390 And I totally want you to be my wife, 930 00:42:32,390 --> 00:42:36,560 my little sweetie boo. 931 00:42:36,560 --> 00:42:38,520 Would you hate me 932 00:42:38,520 --> 00:42:41,470 if we stayed engaged a teeny bit longer? 933 00:42:41,470 --> 00:42:43,560 Until we're both 934 00:42:43,560 --> 00:42:47,930 no doubt, positively sure we're ready? 935 00:42:51,730 --> 00:42:53,140 I could never hate you. 936 00:42:54,270 --> 00:42:55,640 - For real? - Yeah. 937 00:42:55,640 --> 00:42:59,600 And thank you for being honest with me. 938 00:42:59,600 --> 00:43:04,270 That's, like, super important for a healthy marriage. 939 00:43:04,270 --> 00:43:06,270 You are awesome. 940 00:43:06,270 --> 00:43:07,600 I love you. 941 00:43:07,600 --> 00:43:09,850 Mm, I love you too. 942 00:43:11,020 --> 00:43:12,390 Mm. 943 00:43:24,100 --> 00:43:25,140 Okay, okay. 944 00:43:25,140 --> 00:43:27,350 Okay, now. 945 00:43:44,100 --> 00:43:46,730 You're getting pretty good at that. 946 00:43:47,980 --> 00:43:50,520 Fourth time's the charm. 947 00:43:53,140 --> 00:43:55,930 Well, 948 00:43:55,930 --> 00:43:58,390 two left. 949 00:43:58,390 --> 00:43:59,770 Better hope you tire out soon. 950 00:44:05,310 --> 00:44:07,100 Do you think I'm the only person on earth 951 00:44:07,100 --> 00:44:08,640 who doesn't want your babies? 952 00:44:08,640 --> 00:44:10,430 I don't want my babies. 953 00:44:10,430 --> 00:44:14,180 That's why I keep letting other people have them. 954 00:44:14,180 --> 00:44:17,180 I dig this candid version of you. 955 00:44:19,140 --> 00:44:22,470 Now...ask me something about myself. 956 00:44:24,470 --> 00:44:26,640 What's the one thing about Fiona Gallagher 957 00:44:26,640 --> 00:44:29,600 that might surprise me? 958 00:44:29,600 --> 00:44:31,640 That's a tough one. 959 00:44:31,640 --> 00:44:33,890 You seem to have me all figured out. 960 00:44:33,890 --> 00:44:35,850 That's my gift. 961 00:44:38,310 --> 00:44:40,020 How about... 962 00:44:42,640 --> 00:44:45,810 I think I might not want to have kids. 963 00:44:45,810 --> 00:44:48,930 But you're a woman. How is that possible? 964 00:44:50,600 --> 00:44:53,180 Well, my siblings are my kids. 965 00:44:58,980 --> 00:45:00,640 It's nessa. 966 00:45:00,640 --> 00:45:01,890 Mm-hmm. 967 00:45:01,890 --> 00:45:03,180 I'm supposed to be analyzing 968 00:45:03,180 --> 00:45:04,850 your skills and reporting back. 969 00:45:04,850 --> 00:45:06,270 And how am I doing so far? 970 00:45:06,270 --> 00:45:08,930 Overall positive. 971 00:45:08,930 --> 00:45:11,180 Happy to give you more data. 972 00:45:11,180 --> 00:45:13,520 Hi. Can I call you back later? 973 00:45:16,730 --> 00:45:18,520 You're fucking kidding me. 974 00:45:21,520 --> 00:45:23,770 - Thanks for the heads up. - Any time. 975 00:45:23,770 --> 00:45:27,060 Fyi, they just dragged in two sleeping bags and a pull-up bar. 976 00:45:28,930 --> 00:45:30,430 Hello? 977 00:45:32,270 --> 00:45:34,390 - ...uh-huh. - Hi. 978 00:45:34,390 --> 00:45:36,520 Now, everyone, this is the lady 979 00:45:36,520 --> 00:45:37,770 who has been helping us. 980 00:45:37,770 --> 00:45:39,730 This is, uh, my sister, 981 00:45:39,730 --> 00:45:42,890 my cousin, his wife, and their son. 982 00:45:42,890 --> 00:45:43,680 What's going on? 983 00:45:43,680 --> 00:45:45,980 They're paying us to crash here 984 00:45:45,980 --> 00:45:47,730 so we'll have some cash for the shelter. 985 00:45:47,730 --> 00:45:50,020 Oh, fuck! My chair! 986 00:45:50,020 --> 00:45:52,470 Ooh, sorry about that. 987 00:45:52,470 --> 00:45:54,640 Good thing it's an old chair, right? 988 00:45:54,640 --> 00:45:58,430 ♪ Brooding rock music ♪ 989 00:46:20,180 --> 00:46:22,730 Hey. Sorry about last night. 990 00:46:22,730 --> 00:46:24,270 Something came up last minute, and I'm trying 991 00:46:24,270 --> 00:46:25,270 to juggle everything but it's snowballing and-- 992 00:46:25,270 --> 00:46:26,890 and i-- 993 00:46:26,890 --> 00:46:29,430 hey. 994 00:46:29,430 --> 00:46:31,020 - Yeah. - It's snowballing. 995 00:46:31,020 --> 00:46:33,100 I had like 40 people show up to this meeting yesterday. 996 00:46:33,100 --> 00:46:34,680 Yeah, and I had 50 kids show up 997 00:46:34,680 --> 00:46:37,060 to a career symposium about being a paramedic. 998 00:46:37,060 --> 00:46:41,470 But...i guess since yours is about god, you win, right? 999 00:46:41,470 --> 00:46:43,640 - Hey, hey, Ian. - One second, guys. 1000 00:46:43,640 --> 00:46:46,270 I'm helping people in need, same as you. 1001 00:46:46,270 --> 00:46:48,390 Are you saying it's only cool when it's your idea? 1002 00:46:48,390 --> 00:46:50,470 I don't ask a lot of you. 1003 00:46:50,470 --> 00:46:52,930 This was one thing that was important to me. 1004 00:46:52,930 --> 00:46:56,180 You know, maybe what you're doing is worth 1005 00:46:56,180 --> 00:46:57,930 pissing off the people that care about you. 1006 00:46:57,930 --> 00:46:59,060 That's fine. 1007 00:46:59,060 --> 00:47:00,640 But don't insult me 1008 00:47:00,640 --> 00:47:02,770 by acting like it's not happening. 1009 00:47:15,930 --> 00:47:17,520 Hi. 1010 00:47:17,520 --> 00:47:19,890 You didn't speak at the service. 1011 00:47:19,890 --> 00:47:22,600 Uh, I was gonna, but... 1012 00:47:22,600 --> 00:47:25,140 Everything I was gonna say was already said. 1013 00:47:29,930 --> 00:47:32,020 Sorry for your loss. 1014 00:47:33,680 --> 00:47:35,020 Yeah, I lost him a long time ago. 1015 00:47:38,270 --> 00:47:41,470 Still doesn't make it easy. 1016 00:47:41,470 --> 00:47:43,390 He was a good dad, just, um, 1017 00:47:43,390 --> 00:47:46,680 not to me. 1018 00:47:46,680 --> 00:47:48,390 I guess it's easier to be 1019 00:47:48,390 --> 00:47:51,140 kind to somebody who looks up to you. 1020 00:47:51,140 --> 00:47:53,980 Hey, um, 1021 00:47:53,980 --> 00:47:57,390 I found this going through his paperwork. 1022 00:47:57,390 --> 00:47:59,770 It's a draft of a recommendation letter. 1023 00:47:59,770 --> 00:48:02,640 Thought you might want it. 1024 00:48:24,060 --> 00:48:27,020 You know, in all of his years of teaching, 1025 00:48:27,020 --> 00:48:29,560 I never heard him talk about a student like that. 1026 00:48:31,600 --> 00:48:33,060 He says he's amazed by your mind. 1027 00:48:42,270 --> 00:48:44,100 You don't want to keep it? 1028 00:48:47,310 --> 00:48:49,930 Oh, I think I'm too angry to keep it. 1029 00:49:11,680 --> 00:49:14,770 ♪ Rousing rock music ♪ 1030 00:49:14,770 --> 00:49:16,520 Kass? 1031 00:49:16,520 --> 00:49:19,140 Where you at? 1032 00:49:19,140 --> 00:49:21,640 ♪ One, two, three, four, blowing down my door ♪ 1033 00:49:21,640 --> 00:49:24,020 - ♪ five, six, seven, eight... ♪ - Babe? 1034 00:49:24,020 --> 00:49:26,180 Kass! 1035 00:49:27,640 --> 00:49:29,810 Oh! 1036 00:49:29,810 --> 00:49:32,140 You saved my life! 1037 00:49:32,140 --> 00:49:34,980 - You really do love me! - Yeah. 1038 00:49:34,980 --> 00:49:37,020 What time is it? 1039 00:49:37,020 --> 00:49:38,470 Like 4:00? 1040 00:49:38,470 --> 00:49:42,220 The county clerk's office is open til 5:00. 1041 00:49:42,220 --> 00:49:44,890 ♪ Nothing's gonna stop me now ♪ 1042 00:49:53,810 --> 00:49:55,810 That your new chair? 1043 00:49:57,180 --> 00:49:58,310 Why's it over here? 1044 00:50:00,470 --> 00:50:02,770 So that the pile of assholes who are squatting in my apartment 1045 00:50:02,770 --> 00:50:05,270 won't destroy it. 1046 00:50:07,020 --> 00:50:10,220 Who aren't actually assholes. 1047 00:50:10,220 --> 00:50:11,560 They're just poor and broke 1048 00:50:11,560 --> 00:50:13,020 and taking advantage of the situation. 1049 00:50:13,020 --> 00:50:17,350 Just like I've done 100 times. 1050 00:50:17,350 --> 00:50:18,350 And they aren't squatting. 1051 00:50:18,350 --> 00:50:19,810 I told them that they could stay there. 1052 00:50:24,220 --> 00:50:27,850 Did you just get this pic from kassidi? 1053 00:50:27,850 --> 00:50:29,020 Yeah. 1054 00:50:30,060 --> 00:50:31,680 "Birth, marriage, death." 1055 00:50:31,680 --> 00:50:33,180 What the hell is that? 1056 00:50:34,100 --> 00:50:36,810 - I think they got hitched. - What? 1057 00:50:36,810 --> 00:50:39,310 Yeah, I told him not to. 1058 00:50:39,310 --> 00:50:42,390 Not legally, right? She's, like, 15. 1059 00:50:48,810 --> 00:50:50,060 Hey. 1060 00:50:50,060 --> 00:50:52,220 Can I get a ride to this church? 1061 00:50:52,220 --> 00:50:54,890 Supposed to speak at this thing, and I don't know. 1062 00:50:54,890 --> 00:50:58,890 Kinda scared shitless. I mean... 1063 00:50:58,890 --> 00:51:01,730 I don't do speeches. 1064 00:51:01,730 --> 00:51:03,390 So don't do it. 1065 00:51:03,390 --> 00:51:05,680 Sorta feel like I have to. 1066 00:51:05,680 --> 00:51:08,890 Everyone thinks that I have something to say. 1067 00:51:08,890 --> 00:51:10,890 What if I don't? 1068 00:51:10,890 --> 00:51:13,890 ♪ Rock music ♪ 1069 00:51:13,890 --> 00:51:16,180 When they're gone, they're gone, folks, so don't miss out. 1070 00:51:16,180 --> 00:51:18,470 All profits go to help gays across the planet. 1071 00:51:18,470 --> 00:51:21,350 Can you give me just one second? 1072 00:51:21,350 --> 00:51:23,730 Are we really gonna give all of our money to Ian? 1073 00:51:23,730 --> 00:51:25,730 No, of course not. 1074 00:51:25,730 --> 00:51:29,310 Thank you so much for waiting. Gay Jesus loves and blesses you. 1075 00:51:29,310 --> 00:51:31,520 Get your t-shirts here! Don't miss out, folks. 1076 00:51:31,520 --> 00:51:34,140 We're runnin' out. T-shirts. 1077 00:51:40,100 --> 00:51:42,770 Oh, shit. No wonder you're nervous. 1078 00:51:42,770 --> 00:51:45,180 Did you know that all these people were gonna be here? 1079 00:51:45,180 --> 00:51:47,060 - No. - Hey. 1080 00:51:47,060 --> 00:51:48,560 They all came for you. 1081 00:51:48,560 --> 00:51:51,600 Isn't this amazing? 1082 00:51:53,890 --> 00:51:56,640 ♪ Melancholy piano music ♪ 1083 00:52:21,060 --> 00:52:24,430 So I just wanna start out by saying that I'm no hero. 1084 00:52:24,430 --> 00:52:27,470 I'm just a guy who keeps showing up 1085 00:52:27,470 --> 00:52:31,100 to these anti-gay churches and hearing shit like, 1086 00:52:31,100 --> 00:52:33,680 "god created man and woman. 1087 00:52:33,680 --> 00:52:36,470 You either look like a man or a woman. 1088 00:52:36,470 --> 00:52:40,890 Don't...bring us any of your other shit." 1089 00:52:40,890 --> 00:52:43,520 So they're essentially saying, 1090 00:52:43,520 --> 00:52:45,890 "don't make me work too hard 1091 00:52:45,890 --> 00:52:48,930 to see you on your own terms," right? 1092 00:52:50,680 --> 00:52:55,770 But we have the god-given right to be who we are. 1093 00:52:55,770 --> 00:52:58,390 Not who others want us to be. 1094 00:52:58,390 --> 00:53:00,350 So when they say shit like, 1095 00:53:00,350 --> 00:53:04,680 "don't use fake words like 'nonbinary' 1096 00:53:04,680 --> 00:53:09,020 or 'gender-fluid,' 'cis-whatever,'" it's like... 1097 00:53:10,140 --> 00:53:13,310 Those are my terms, bitch. 1098 00:53:13,310 --> 00:53:15,220 Mm-hmm, yep. 1099 00:53:23,430 --> 00:53:25,100 Mm-hmm. 1100 00:53:26,270 --> 00:53:31,180 Which means we have to be so big, 1101 00:53:31,180 --> 00:53:32,560 so noisy... 1102 00:53:32,560 --> 00:53:34,770 That there's nowhere else to look. 1103 00:53:34,770 --> 00:53:37,390 And we do it in god's name because... 1104 00:53:39,140 --> 00:53:42,890 Because god hates haters. 1105 00:53:45,850 --> 00:53:48,890 ♪ Rock music ♪ 1106 00:54:10,220 --> 00:54:12,310 I spotted 12 safety violations. 1107 00:54:12,310 --> 00:54:14,980 No wonder they pay so much. 1108 00:54:14,980 --> 00:54:16,680 I think I'm gonna bail. 1109 00:54:16,680 --> 00:54:18,270 I gotta stick it out. I need the cash. 1110 00:54:18,270 --> 00:54:19,430 Mm-hmm. 1111 00:54:19,430 --> 00:54:20,680 Hey, could you grab me a clip light? 1112 00:54:20,680 --> 00:54:21,930 Can barely see anything I'm doing. 1113 00:54:21,930 --> 00:54:23,060 Okay. 1114 00:54:30,430 --> 00:54:31,930 Debbie! 1115 00:54:33,930 --> 00:54:35,060 Call 911! 1116 00:54:45,100 --> 00:54:46,390 Hi. 1117 00:54:49,180 --> 00:54:51,850 This fucking day, man. 1118 00:54:51,850 --> 00:54:52,730 Find Svetlana a man? 1119 00:54:52,730 --> 00:54:54,980 No, she grabbed the guy's cock. 1120 00:54:58,310 --> 00:55:00,470 Is that a good thing or a bad thing? 1121 00:55:00,470 --> 00:55:02,980 Not taking her home to meet mom. 1122 00:55:04,470 --> 00:55:05,470 Where you coming from? 1123 00:55:06,980 --> 00:55:09,220 Church. 1124 00:55:09,890 --> 00:55:11,730 Ian has a cult. 1125 00:55:11,730 --> 00:55:13,020 - A what? - Yeah. 1126 00:55:13,020 --> 00:55:16,140 They think he's gay Jesus. 1127 00:55:16,140 --> 00:55:19,390 Looking for Fiona Gallagher. 1128 00:55:19,390 --> 00:55:20,560 That's me. 1129 00:55:20,560 --> 00:55:23,020 You've been served. 1130 00:55:29,560 --> 00:55:30,640 "As a result of one or more acts 1131 00:55:30,640 --> 00:55:34,270 by defendant l. Donner and defendant f. Gallagher, 1132 00:55:34,270 --> 00:55:37,680 plaintiff r. Latham has been injured, 1133 00:55:37,680 --> 00:55:39,060 damaged, and incapacitated." 1134 00:55:39,060 --> 00:55:41,770 Who the fuck is r. Latham? 1135 00:55:43,220 --> 00:55:44,600 Rodney. 1136 00:55:44,600 --> 00:55:45,930 The dude that fell off your roof? 1137 00:55:45,930 --> 00:55:46,930 He's suing you? 1138 00:55:46,930 --> 00:55:49,850 "Plaintiff demands judgment against defendants 1139 00:55:49,850 --> 00:55:52,770 in the sum of $6 million." 1140 00:55:54,350 --> 00:55:56,390 Motherfucker. 1141 00:55:56,390 --> 00:55:58,390 Motherfucker! 1142 00:55:58,390 --> 00:56:01,390 ♪ Rock music ♪ 1143 00:56:12,140 --> 00:56:14,390 ♪ Whoa-oh ♪ 1144 00:56:14,390 --> 00:56:16,100 ♪ I'm the love he left you with ♪ 1145 00:56:19,390 --> 00:56:20,560 ♪ you sound bent out of shape ♪ 1146 00:56:20,560 --> 00:56:22,560 ♪ no blood can try to stop me now ♪ 1147 00:42:49,430 --> 00:42:50,717 .Srt extracted, synced and corrected by dan4jem, ad.I.Mmxviii 79497

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