Original subtitles

[Music]

from my time living among the cheyenne

i learned that to find game one must

listen to the winds

for the winds would reveal where the

game was not

and in so doing

where it was

you seen that before white rice

yes

same tracks were outside the wagon train

what type of creature preys on human

beings like this

it is a name we give to the great bull

elk

very dangerous during running season

you will have to kill him

or he will kill you

but this land was what pd's long before

it was ours

does not seem right that we should kill

him

the great full hell

beware

beware

your time is up quite right

to do battle with wabiti

baby

[Music]

i'm sorry i can't do this

so what's your problem

oh come on wapiti the great bull elk

devoured a wagon train

it just doesn't work for me it's

ridiculous

maybe it's a wagon train that's your

problem what about two wagons

four people

and el could handle them

no problem

no

no

just doesn't work

i mean it's

it's an elf

elk is like a deer

a deer

is sympathetic it has gentle sweet

cute eyes

i could never devour a wagon train

nobody's gonna believe an elk

bear

mountain lion maybe

what about a pack of wolves can't

approach the symbolic power of a single

creature

life and death one-on-one mythic

struggle between civilized man and the

wild beast

speaking of wild beasts

what happened to sylvester he's out for

his annual cleaning

i wondered why it smelled so fresh in

here today

there you are

oh

parver i thought i informed you and my

wire that the pages were emerging at a

slightly slower pace than intel you

might write faster if you kept a pencil

in your hand instead of a cup of

old forester i believe

i write with my rights i sip with my

left well mr allen would not approve of

nicodemus legend drinking bourbon in

public it's not in public it's in a

teacup

besides

lamar and i have an understanding oh has

he signed a confidentiality agreement

with us lamar won't tell any more than

the bartender in sacramento would tell

about you and

the girl in the fishnet stockings

not at all funny mr pratt we both know

you slipped something into that drink

now perhaps i should mention lamar that

e.c allen publishing is extremely

litigious oh i'm sure the minions in

your legal department have better things

to do

like cheating me out of my royalties mr

pratt the executive vice president of

legal affairs personally cheats you out

of your royalties none of which has any

relevance to the proceedings today now

mr allen has arranged a wonderful tie-in

to launch your new book legend and the

quest for wapiti the elk the elk is

still in question the elk was mr allen's

idea was it not yes just the kind of

idea someone from maine might have about

the wild west

what's tie-in the book is still about a

hunt i presume the hunt is a metaphor

yes it's about a hunt

i have great news

nicodemus legend is going to be the

guide on a real hunt excuse me

a hunting party is here all the way from

germany or you are going to guide them

into the wilds

harry i know nothing about hunting

in the wilds that is it's just another

public appearance mr pratt one of great

importance i might add

you are going to have the honor of

guiding baron ludwig outman

and his son

oh and his son

is that name supposed to mean something

to me i would hope you would know the

name of your european publisher oh and

by the way they might be under the

impression that you really are nicodemus

legend

harry you didn't tell them the truth did

you ever ask i never offered it's

another continent who is going to care i

care

[Music]

shorter than i expected

[Music]

do

[Music]

hair legend

this is indeed a great honor

hetzling

bill coming in sheriff oh friend

this is my son

ralph

howdy

and this is my ballot

helmet hey whoever of you owns these

dogs get them out of here

my foose

well

you were going to have such a good time

i only wish i could be there with you

eric where are you going don't they

they've got van bob oliphant in a jail

down in tucson that's the original bad

bob not the other one we're working on a

deal to autograph some daguerreotypes

for the catalog if they hang him he'll

be worth a fortune gentlemen

what happened to sylvester

a stein of your finest beer sir

[Music]

about finished with sylvester there

smokey oh just about your honor good

he's been nipping on that

and bombing fluid again have you no sir

i won't make that mistake again good all

right

all right

it's a good thing we only do this once a

year

a legend tell me

where will you be leading us

in the morning

well now that's a question that requires

consideration and forethoughts plenty of

grouse and pheasant in the foothills

this time of year

to the foothills it is then

a safari to the untamed grouse and

pheasant lands of america

i suppose

there's a fight against nonfarsan

the enraged grouse is nothing to be

laughed at

hey you forgive our amusement legend

you see royal's gun

with your knowledge of guns there's no

need to explain what we're after i'm

sure

looks like you're after poland

all into time

buffalo

[Applause]

[Applause]

he's a goner

ah man

this is just a cultural misunderstanding

culture

they shot a stuffed buffalo head

what kind of culture does that well i

gladly pay for any damages

can you fix them

i only got two eyes in stock and they're

both blue

ain't we burying glass eye joe in the

morning

that's right

these glass eyes brown

yeah but it's an open coffin service

open coffin

closed eyes

[Music]

i know nothing about buffalo i've never

even seen a buffalo i certainly don't

know how to find them

i have trouble finding my own room at

night sometimes i'm getting a two delay

check the on-boarder receiver

it's quite remarkable isn't it professor

the bartok wireless steam-controlled

quadruple speed a natural extension of

the moss technology in the latest land

transport technology

i foresee a day

when you'll be able to run your entire

household without moving a muscle

is that such a good thing professor

do we then not create a physically

deficient society oh no but man will

compensate a new religion will evolve

the religion of physical conditioning

excuse me

don't worry about ramos it'll never

happen

can we talk about something a little

more important like hunting buffalo with

germans

i'm not interested in your personal

recreation

nicodemus legend has to go hunting with

the germans you're half of nicodemus

legend therefore ergo so

you have to go too you're crossing the

line ernest i'm a hungarian you know so

what well if you understood your

european history you would know that the

germans and the hungarians are a little

bit likely what the the cowboys and the

farmers only with heavy artillery

professor

no one is looking to debate the

iniquities of the habsburg dynasty i

just need help finding buffalo

really trying my patience please please

all right

ramos

oh

that's a good idea that's actually a

very good idea the bartok seisma

chronograph it measures land vibrations

you know i like that idea you can take a

herd of buffalo and by registering the

vibrations of the herd as it runs across

the ground you will be able to bring it

onto the spoon

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

what is this her legend where's your

horse this is the famous legend

philosophy

oh yeah from blood and the texas sands

listen up exactly

there's one thing you can say about a

philosophy won't get skittish around an

angry buffalo

well i was hoping for a more traditional

western hunt

when you ask for nicodemus legend to be

your guide you get nicodemus legend

janos christoph bartok my technical

associate

bartok

hungarian that's correct

good

a gypsy to carry our guns

if i were prussian i'd be very cautious

about giving a gun to a hungarian

this is my associate vitzli lapoche

ramos

you will be accompanying us i don't

carry guns either

all right then any other ground rules we

should discuss

good

we should leave on the northern winds

southern wind whatever

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[Music]

[Music]

oh

[Music]

this country you're leading us through

is most beautiful

but i'm beginning to wonder are there

any buffalo in it cost the buffalo in it

you think nicodemus legend would take

you on an expedition without knowing

where the buffalo roam

i mean no disrespect a legend

i'm only curious as to your scouting

method

i

listen to the winds

to the winds

yes

the winds will reveal where the prey is

not and in so doing

where it is

it may take some time

but there are buffalo out there we'll

find them

there are lots and lots of buffalo out

there

somewhere

not for much longer according to your

illustrious general sherman

we dined with him in chicago

and he told me once the west is rid of

the buffalo

the indians will cease to be nomadic

without the buffalo for sustenance

they will be forced to stay on the

reservations

and become totally dependent

on your government

wouldn't let those prussian idiots

anywhere near the buffalo i know

but i'm not nicknames legend

and my foreign royalties were over ten

thousand dollars last year

[Music]

i know i know

[Music]

no reading no reading at all

well

i think we're gonna have to turn back

back why

because here ludwig there are no buffalo

we should have found thousands of

buffalo by now

it wasn't until i saw that cloud drift

that i truly understood what cloud drift

an early cumulo nimbo formation

much as i encountered in legend and the

clouds of doom

that's what it was titled in our country

very poor setup

what does that have to do with anything

a poor seller

really

alejandra

where are the buffalo

yes

the cumulo nimbo formation indicates a

severe freeze is coming a severe freeze

it's almost 70 degrees

yes that's why they're called the clouds

of doom

yes the

buffalo understand these things oh yes

i wouldn't look at those cloud drifts

and

the head buffalo makes a noise to the

others and they all kind of

just blaze a trail right on down to

arizona and all points south uh uh mr

legend not now ramos

actually baron

there's evidence that the buffalo

followed the same southern migration as

the canadian geese

what

of course there are still the very dumb

buffalo that don't know how to tell

whether

you did it

you did it you found them

gentlemen two arms

wait

wow

[Music]

we make camp

we found the herd now we set up camp and

planner attack

what plan there they are we shoot yep

put that down

look wait come here

come here

you said

you wanted a traditional buffalo western

hunt god well there's an old western

tradition that says

you find the herd

and you set up camp and you plan

carefully

you don't want to go against tradition

do you

no if i went to germany i'd observed

german tradition heck

i'd even wear those

short little pants

what'd you put in the beer oh just a

mild sedative

pharmacology was one of my special

interests in school

did you bring anything to start a

stampede

we have other options you know

i was thinking that perhaps we could uh

ah yes exactly

the electro fulminator it's fully

charged i would expect no less you're

not gonna blast a buffalo with that

thing well no but i'm going to scare a

buffalo and thereby possibly start a

stampede perhaps if we added the sound

of gunfire

works for me

[Music]

why is it that when men find themselves

around cattle they have the overwhelming

need to say

yeehaw

yeehaw that's what you say to cows cows

understand yeehaw

yes but why not yahi

you risk confusing the cow with the

inversion yeehaw says

i'm your friend listen to me

yeehaw

get out of here before you get killed go

on

engage

hmm

perhaps such primitive beasts require

more primitive motivation

uh i assume you know how to use that

thing oh yes

i had to learn for a public appearance

before the alameda rifle club

the president was a pert little divorcee

i miss her deeply

she had a 44 as i recall

engage

we can't move the herd what about moving

the germans

well i don't know i mean i used a mild

sedative so that

[Music]

i am tawashi

and these are my warriors

we have watched you come into our lands

with your guns

why do you chase our buffalo tawasi we

want nothing to do with hunting your

buffalo we were trying to chase them

away to safety and long lives

the buffalo are smart

they know we would kill anyone who would

hunt on our land

is that a hard and fast rule a sometime

thing

excuse me

you know who i am

just because i am indian does not mean i

do not enjoy a good book now and then

why did i come please

but

you know

it's always nice to meet a fan i didn't

say i was a fan

why do you always write about the

cheyenne

i take it you're not cheyenne arapaho

arapaho have

many stories you can use in your books

nobody wants to read about the cheyenne

tawashi

even as we speak i'm at work on a new

book legend and the quest for wapiti the

elk

elk

elk is slow stupid and ugly

yes i know

but this is a wonderful tale with many

brave arapaho warriors it's not quite

finished yet but the thrust of the story

maintains a very strong arapaho theme

all right you three can't go we'll just

kill the others yeah tawashi

you can't just kill those people it is

the will of thunder hooves

the great buffalo spirit

she has seen too many white men come and

slaughter the herd take the hides in the

horns and leave the rest to rot in the

sun i agree the white man has not

behaved with great compassion

but if you know nicodemus legend you

know that he can always find a better

solution than violence you know

[Music]

i will listen what i

but i make no promises

it's great

now just let me consult with my advisors

okay

we got problems big problems what do you

mean we white man well i'm sure it could

be worked out satisfactorily no you

don't understand the indians want to

kill the germans what makes you think i

don't understand

look

we've got to convince them that if they

let the germans go

no one will ever come back to their

lands to kill the herd

you have a hard enough time convincing

me let alone the indians wapiti

the elk what about him you wrote at the

end of chapter two that no one would go

anywhere near cheyenne land because they

feared the terrible bull elk

you mean creature

no

not wapidi

thunderhooves

the great and vengeful she buffalo

spirit of the arapaho

yes

it solves my creative problems and keeps

the germans alive at the same time great

idea with a few alterations to one of

the philosophies we could create a

pretty frightening thunderhoofs

i'll take care of it that's a very good

idea

it's all right nothing to worry about

just another part of the package

what package

well i'd hate for you to come this far

and not see a real live american indian

see

why have you taken our guns

oh look a genuine indian artifact

a gift for you in trade for your

prussian artifact

trade

find german guns for a

cheap indian hatchet actually it's an

object to art

worth hundreds and hundreds of dollars

to collectors back east i can only

imagine what it's worth in europe

may i have another word with you yes

absolutely

excuse me

um

we've got a plan tawashi if it works

you won't be bothered by white hunters

ever again

how do you expect to do that well you

said it yourself

thunderhooves

those germans are about to come face to

face with a very angry buffalo spirit

then i'll put her in my next book what

the heck screw the elk

you want to write about an arapaho

spirit

and put it in your book that's right

i don't think that i can permit that oh

come on chief we do it all the time with

the cheyenne what's more we pay for the

rights

right yes

i want to buy the rights to

thunderhooves

we're not talking beads here

100

150

official us dollars i don't suppose you

can give us guns

chief fine yeah

we'll take the money good

back

say

how about some of those peppy german

folk songs i'm sure the boys here would

be fascinated by the lyrics

it's all sad good good

almost feels it's better to deliver the

creature after dark i'll try to keep him

alive that long go

oh right then where's the hungarian

going

uh

we forgot the indians personal

appearance contract back in sheridan we

neglected to stipulate that you were

european there might be an additional

charge a little fee

these indians do not look so friendly to

me our legend

what

oh no nonsense it's all just

part of the act they're great

here's an idea

how about a traditional arapaho rain

dance what do you think tawashi

how about a rain dance a little

tradition little rain dance what do you

think come on

we don't need a rain dance we get 15

inches a year around here work with me

tawashi work with me tradition the rain

little

rain tradition little rhythm little rain

rain and tradition

and cows

professor

oh

well done ramos

we shall have sylvester back in mayor

braun's shop

before he is even missed

phew

come come get to work

perhaps why'd i

your friends would like to hear the

story of thunder hooves

thunder hoofs

she who protects the herd from the white

hunters

is that right

i think that's a good idea chief

they say she comes from the sky

but we are not certain

one thing we know

she is unforgiving and ruthless

i heard it said she devoured a wagon

train some years back

a buffalo devouring a wagon train

it's nonsense

others have left

but not for long

you have summoned her this night

i must warn you

do not taunt her

yes well i see no thunder hooves well

for that matter

neither do i

but she will come she will

come

i hope she's here in the morning so i

can shoot her with my gun

who will not touch this

good

good make it go a little faster

five degrees

alright

good good flame

good good

is

there's a sight for every hungarian's

heart

german backsides in retreat

[Music]

[Applause]

no shooting

no guns and no shooting now you boys put

those guns away or else chip you right

out of town on the same stage

uh welcome back baron damn

there you go

we're here to kill that monster buffalo

her tail about where can we find them

you mean fun thunderhooves that's the

name well i uh can't rightly say but uh

let me welcome you gentlemen to sheridan

home of nicodemus legend and

thunderhouse and here he is now our very

own nicodemus legend

i try and read one of your books

and you feel you wasted a year of your

life

a legend

are you surprised to see mr soon again

ecstatic i told the story of our

adventure all the way back to saint

louis i can't tell you how many people

have told me they must come and see this

thunder hooves with their own eyes

well now baron

i sure wish you hadn't gone and done

that

see i i really don't want to rile up old

thunder hooves again you know what i

mean

i say we

keep our distance well

i ain't never met a buffer i couldn't

kill

nice i didn't catch the name williams

they call me gizzard eating williams

it's not my giving name though

and i'm sure there's a charming story to

go with that

but mr williams

may i call you giz

i have to tell you i have no intention

of taking another party onto arapahoe

lands

then we'll go without you

i must agree with mr gizzard

i'm going to take the height of that

whatever it is back to dusseldorf

i'm not going back to germany in

disgrace there was no disgrace that

night baron

we were dealing with a force far greater

than any science

and a force protecting a way of life

i've come to respect and love

i would suggest to mr legend that it is

your royalties that protect the way of

life that you most respect and love

and i strongly recommend you reconsider

man

well you've done it again mr legend

this thunderhooves could be a boon to

this town

[Music]

they can't shoot what they can't find

they'll simply get bored and they will

leave janos it's impossible to bore a

german

gentleman we have a guest

[Music]

i don't like this

well chief it's actually all quite

harmless just don't touch anything

you play with the great orenda

the powerful spirit of nature can you

call that harmless

[Music]

six of our buffalo were killed today

what he said

is that if they can't find thunderhooves

they will shoot whatever they can shoot

we need thunderhooves to return

well now tawashi i don't think that's a

very good idea you see we had no idea

that a mythical creature would be

attracting crazies from st louis and

points east we cannot allow the

slaughter to continue your people do not

respect what the great spirit gave the

indian

in order for him to survive

i am sorry but we are prepared to shed

blood on the next hunters we see wait a

minute wait a minute

what if thunder hooves were able to lead

the hunters away from the arapahoe land

away from the hunting ground we could do

this by controlling it from the balloon

and then take them up into the hills

[Music]

are you feeling well to washington

to see the landers horrendous season

it reminds a man of

how small a part of the world he is

it is an honor to be with you

now

how fast can we get this thing

down well it'll be all over in about 20

minutes to wash it here take a look

i want you to make a course correction

of about five degrees and keep us at 300

feet of altitude we should be

intercepting the hunting party in about

one minute

boys and i've been talking burn

knowing his right mind hunts in the dark

the beast is charging you can't stand

till it's too late

thunder huns only comes out at night

you're kind of foolish to go hunter in

the day

of course if you're scared giz we can

always have someone escort you back to

the comfort of your hotel

i don't like you

my life is complete

what a colorful fellow

i'm thinking of taking him home with me

as a gift for the children of dusseldorf

i think i see them oh yes indeed

and the hunters shall be arriving at

their prearranged location any minute

now

why are we slowing down

don't you feel it

what

[Music]

that ominous quiet

we felt the other night

like the calm before the storm

thunderhooves is coming

oh

the battle has begun

push the flame power

[Music]

all right

listen

come on

uh

trouble what's wrong she's not

responding to control she's moving south

by southwest right into the town

one of the weapons must have damaged the

energy receptors

i'd like to think that the real spirit

of thunder hooves has taken possession

of her body

[Music]

come on

come on

faster now that's right that's right

hurry

good

good

[Music]

what's wrong

something damaged the remote control

we're merely spectators now wait a

minute

are you telling me a fire-breathing

mechanical buffalo is raging out of

control yes and there's just a little

bit more what it's about to attack the

towels get in now

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

hold john

[Applause]

[Music]

um

oh my god

is there any way to steer that thing but

there's a manual override where is it

it's inside the head

[Applause]

mommy help me

mommy

[Music]

it's all right

now i'll never get a buffalo hide to

take home

yes but just think of the european sales

when he writes his book

ah i have our talk spoken like a true

european

[Laughter]

[Music]

everyone at the saloon thinks that

thunderhouse has gone off into the

mountains and all the hunters have

followed him

well it looks like your lands and

buffalo are safe for a while tawashi

you have served as well this night

thunderhooves

and you

why we'll also be a friend to the rapper

not just a friend

a brother i wouldn't go that far

now regarding the matter of payment

we're negotiating ah yes

i'm sure the bank voucher is in the mail

have i ever told you about the other

arapaho animal spirits i could make

available to you no we have a wonderful

black bear we have water snakes or

perhaps you heard about the

feel of mine

a little tradition little rain dance

what do you think come on

we don't need a rain dance we got 15

inches a year in here work with me

tawashi work with me tradition the rain

little

the rain tradition little

little rhythm little rain

little

i've got

that over that's no fun

keep rolling

[Music]

you