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1
00:00:01,800 --> 00:00:04,000
Guess how many sleeps
it is till the wedding?
2
00:00:04,040 --> 00:00:06,520
-One day.
-120. Close.
3
00:00:06,560 --> 00:00:09,600
[Grindah] Orzeski Sola. What?
4
00:00:09,640 --> 00:00:13,040
Where's all the...? Why's
everything written in foreign?
5
00:00:13,080 --> 00:00:15,800
-Have you been shopping at
the fake supermarket again?
-Yeah.
6
00:00:15,840 --> 00:00:19,200
Just cos we need to save
a little bit of money
for the wedding fund.
7
00:00:19,240 --> 00:00:22,280
-They taste the same,
don't they?
-Sort of.
8
00:00:22,320 --> 00:00:27,400
Coco Krisps? These are fake
Coco Pops! It hasn't even
got the monkey on the front.
9
00:00:27,440 --> 00:00:31,640
It's like the cereal version
of two-stripe tracksuit bottoms.
10
00:00:31,680 --> 00:00:34,600
You know I wouldn't
be seen dead in them.
11
00:00:36,320 --> 00:00:38,680
Great! It didn't even turn
the milk chocolatey.
12
00:00:41,000 --> 00:00:44,040
[director] So has Grindah
contributed much to
the wedding fund?
13
00:00:44,080 --> 00:00:48,200
Uh, he hasn't put loads
towards it yet, but...
14
00:00:48,240 --> 00:00:50,360
he did contribute
the jar itself
15
00:00:50,400 --> 00:00:52,760
and that's, obviously,
a massive help.
16
00:00:52,800 --> 00:00:54,880
It's actually his old weed jar,
17
00:00:54,920 --> 00:00:57,960
but I've just written
"wedding fund" on it.
18
00:00:58,000 --> 00:01:00,640
So now it looks like
a completely different jar.
19
00:01:00,680 --> 00:01:04,160
You can see bits at
the bottom still, but...
20
00:01:07,840 --> 00:01:09,320
Oh!
21
00:01:09,360 --> 00:01:11,720
I forgot about that.
22
00:01:15,520 --> 00:01:18,400
Another letter from
Her Royal Majesty.
23
00:01:18,440 --> 00:01:21,560
Funny how a moment of madness
can change your life forever,
isn't it?
24
00:01:21,600 --> 00:01:24,880
-What's the letter?
-Uh, just...
25
00:01:24,920 --> 00:01:27,760
-Can't really talk about it
at the moment, mate.
-Okay.
26
00:01:27,800 --> 00:01:31,800
But what I will say is
it's just another...
27
00:01:31,840 --> 00:01:34,320
bit of trouble with the law
again, d'you know what I mean?
28
00:01:34,360 --> 00:01:36,480
But they can't hold me down.
29
00:01:36,520 --> 00:01:39,920
"Court case pending".
30
00:01:39,960 --> 00:01:45,360
Basically, he got caught
dropping a cigarette and he
refused to pay the fine, so...
31
00:01:45,400 --> 00:01:48,040
I mean, what do they expect
people to do?
32
00:01:48,080 --> 00:01:50,280
Walk around with their
own ashtrays or something?
33
00:01:50,320 --> 00:01:53,320
I mean, it's political
correctness gone mad.
34
00:01:55,560 --> 00:01:57,480
Oi, oi!
35
00:01:57,520 --> 00:01:59,320
Bo-Nan-za!
36
00:01:59,360 --> 00:02:01,440
There's my nan!
37
00:02:01,480 --> 00:02:03,560
Oh, there he is, there he is.
38
00:02:03,600 --> 00:02:05,640
-Are you all right, love?
-Yes!
39
00:02:05,680 --> 00:02:08,880
-Yes!
-I didn't expect you.
40
00:02:08,920 --> 00:02:11,000
-Sorry, man. Squeeze on there.
-Make yourself comfortable.
41
00:02:11,040 --> 00:02:14,320
-Did you get your prescription
through today?
-Yes, thank you.
42
00:02:14,360 --> 00:02:16,840
-Oh, that's good, innit?
-Yes, thank you.
43
00:02:16,880 --> 00:02:20,560
That reminds me.
Won't keep you a moment.
44
00:02:20,600 --> 00:02:23,960
-Aaaaaagh! Yes!
-Talk amongst yourselves.
45
00:02:25,640 --> 00:02:28,920
Prescription day.
It's really exciting.
46
00:02:30,440 --> 00:02:32,240
D-I-Y.
47
00:02:34,480 --> 00:02:37,040
Every champion needs his belt.
48
00:02:37,080 --> 00:02:39,960
And I am DIY champion
of the world. [laughs]
49
00:02:42,600 --> 00:02:45,600
I'm definitely a handyman.
I'm the guy you call.
I'm the handy guy.
50
00:02:45,640 --> 00:02:47,240
Handy Peters.
51
00:02:47,280 --> 00:02:48,960
Uh! Breath in.
52
00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:50,680
I did everything myself.
53
00:02:50,720 --> 00:02:54,000
I came here, built
an empire by myself, yeah?
54
00:02:54,040 --> 00:02:56,400
Built the perfect home
for myself.
55
00:02:56,440 --> 00:02:59,600
Built the perfect wife
for myself, until she...
You know what happened.
56
00:02:59,640 --> 00:03:02,400
But I'm a very DIY guy.
57
00:03:16,560 --> 00:03:19,320
Nah, it's impossible.
58
00:03:19,360 --> 00:03:21,040
There's too many pieces.
59
00:03:21,080 --> 00:03:23,000
It should just come
already done, innit?
60
00:03:23,040 --> 00:03:24,800
-Hiya, Steve.
-All right, Nan.
61
00:03:26,280 --> 00:03:28,560
Is that enough?
62
00:03:28,600 --> 00:03:31,600
Yeah, that's perfect!
Oh, amazing.
63
00:03:31,640 --> 00:03:33,840
You planning a big do, are you?
64
00:03:33,880 --> 00:03:37,440
No, no, no, it's just a DJ set,
but it's like an eight-hour one.
65
00:03:37,480 --> 00:03:40,520
So it's quite a big deal for me.
66
00:03:40,560 --> 00:03:44,640
I would say drugs can
definitely help you to be,
like, more creative.
67
00:03:44,680 --> 00:03:47,520
Cos look at some of
the best music ever made.
68
00:03:47,560 --> 00:03:50,040
It's made by people that are
just off their nut on drugs.
69
00:03:50,080 --> 00:03:52,760
[director] Are you saying drugs
have helped your music career?
70
00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:56,120
I wouldn't be where I am today
if it wasn't for the drugs,
71
00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:58,280
I'll say that much.
72
00:03:58,320 --> 00:04:01,160
'Ere, make sure you give your
old nan a good shout out.
73
00:04:01,200 --> 00:04:04,400
Obviously. Shout out my nan
each and every!
74
00:04:04,440 --> 00:04:07,240
-Shout out the jigsaw crew!
-Yes, yes.
75
00:04:07,280 --> 00:04:10,960
Shout the old
colostomy bag crew!
76
00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:12,320
Yes!
77
00:04:15,200 --> 00:04:17,600
-Hi.
-Rochie. How you doing?
78
00:04:17,640 --> 00:04:19,880
-I'm all right. How are you?
-Here to get busy.
79
00:04:19,920 --> 00:04:22,760
-Okay, nothing structural.
-Whey, Kevin!
80
00:04:22,800 --> 00:04:25,960
-[laughs] DIY! DIY!
-Yes!
81
00:04:26,000 --> 00:04:28,760
-Just be sensible, yeah?
-Don't worry, don't worry.
82
00:04:28,800 --> 00:04:31,760
-Nothing massive.
-Oh, that's what she said!
83
00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:35,080
-Yeah, that is what she said.
-Okay.
84
00:04:35,120 --> 00:04:40,920
[Kevin] Yeah, I promised Roche
that I'd get the baby's room
ready in time for the birth.
85
00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:43,480
It's actually called nesting.
86
00:04:43,520 --> 00:04:45,560
Yeah, it's what birds do.
87
00:04:45,600 --> 00:04:47,880
But, obviously, without
using twigs or spit.
88
00:04:47,920 --> 00:04:50,800
Hey, just throw it,
just throw it. It's fine.
89
00:04:50,840 --> 00:04:53,360
[director] You got Chabuds
in to help you with
the baby's room?
90
00:04:53,400 --> 00:04:56,680
Yeah. I mean, Chabuds is one
of those guys that can
do anything.
91
00:04:56,720 --> 00:05:00,520
And I thought, you know,
like, he's cheaper
92
00:05:00,560 --> 00:05:02,480
than getting
a proper painter in.
93
00:05:02,520 --> 00:05:04,440
On this wall, right,
94
00:05:04,480 --> 00:05:07,280
I was thinking maybe
we could have a memorial
95
00:05:07,320 --> 00:05:10,960
with, like, loads of
cartoon characters in,
cos kids love that, innit?
96
00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:14,240
They do love... Yeah, I can do
that for you, no problem.
I have all the classics.
97
00:05:14,280 --> 00:05:16,120
The Mickey Mouse,
the Goofy Ducks.
98
00:05:16,160 --> 00:05:18,400
-I can do that, no problem.
-Brilliant, brilliant.
99
00:05:18,440 --> 00:05:21,880
-Really...
-Craig! Do you want
to help your old man?
100
00:05:21,920 --> 00:05:24,640
Craig? Craig?
101
00:05:24,680 --> 00:05:27,960
So you're gonna have a sister.
Are you good with girlie things?
102
00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:31,120
-Obviously not.
-He used fake tan once.
103
00:05:31,160 --> 00:05:33,760
-Yeah.
-That was just an error.
104
00:05:33,800 --> 00:05:36,920
I once showered with Roche's
thing called Jolene.
105
00:05:36,960 --> 00:05:39,240
I lost all my body hair.
106
00:05:40,920 --> 00:05:44,120
-Bit worried about Craig,
actually.
-Yeah.
107
00:05:44,160 --> 00:05:46,720
Apparently, when you
have a new kid, right,
108
00:05:46,760 --> 00:05:50,040
sometimes the older kid
feels a bit left out.
109
00:05:50,080 --> 00:05:52,400
Yeah, I've heard about that.
You know what you need to do?
110
00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:56,840
You need to get a piece of
clothing, piece of cloth,
from the baby,
111
00:05:56,880 --> 00:06:00,720
and put the cloth directly
under Craig's nose when
he's sleeping.
112
00:06:00,760 --> 00:06:05,400
That way, subconsciously,
he will not feel threatened
by the baby child, you know?
113
00:06:05,440 --> 00:06:08,120
Yeah, I think that's dogs.
114
00:06:08,160 --> 00:06:11,560
Actually, that is dogs.
Yeah, that's dogs.
115
00:06:20,520 --> 00:06:23,280
Yeah, that's probably enough,
cos you've got gel
on there as well.
116
00:06:23,320 --> 00:06:26,600
Just going to give him some
of this extra-firm hold, so...
117
00:06:26,640 --> 00:06:30,320
Yeah, not too much! You've got
quite a lot of product on that.
118
00:06:30,360 --> 00:06:34,720
Ooh, Miche, I've got the details
of that make-up artist
we used for my wedding.
119
00:06:34,760 --> 00:06:37,120
Oh, amazing! Thank you.
120
00:06:37,160 --> 00:06:39,960
I don't know what our budget
is yet, cos Grindah's got
his court case tomorrow.
121
00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:42,880
He still hasn't paid that fine?
That is mental!
122
00:06:42,920 --> 00:06:45,000
I know. I'm worried
it's going to go up loads.
123
00:06:45,040 --> 00:06:47,800
I read about this woman
who disputed a parking fine.
124
00:06:47,840 --> 00:06:51,040
She ended up having to pay
loads more. She had to
sell her car.
125
00:06:51,080 --> 00:06:54,360
Oh, we'll be fine then,
cos we haven't got a car, so...
126
00:06:57,080 --> 00:06:59,720
I think it looks amazing.
127
00:07:02,920 --> 00:07:05,720
Just do that. It creates
a nice swoosh effect.
128
00:07:05,760 --> 00:07:08,320
-Just be one with the paint.
-Nice.
129
00:07:08,360 --> 00:07:12,520
-I really get into it, you know.
-[knocking on front door]
130
00:07:12,560 --> 00:07:16,400
No, it's all right,
the pregnant lady will get it.
131
00:07:16,440 --> 00:07:19,120
Oh, hello. Are you here
to help as well, are you?
132
00:07:19,160 --> 00:07:21,640
-Uh? No.
-No? What you here for then?
133
00:07:21,680 --> 00:07:24,440
What am I here for? Beats
wants me in my last hour.
134
00:07:24,480 --> 00:07:26,760
Oh, that's right.
Sent down for a cigarette.
135
00:07:26,800 --> 00:07:28,800
-Yeah, I could be, so...
-I know.
136
00:07:28,840 --> 00:07:30,840
-Yeah, you know, so...
-It'll be awful.
137
00:07:30,880 --> 00:07:33,120
Yeah, you'll be awful.
138
00:07:33,160 --> 00:07:35,400
How you boys doing?
You all right?
139
00:07:35,440 --> 00:07:37,560
-Yeah, so...
-Easy, boys.
140
00:07:37,600 --> 00:07:39,240
-Grindah!
-Grindah!
141
00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:41,440
-Yes! Thanks for coming, man.
-No worries.
142
00:07:41,480 --> 00:07:43,960
-Thanks for helping out.
-No, no, no, none of that.
143
00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:46,360
I got court tomorrow,
so I can't get any paint on me.
144
00:07:46,400 --> 00:07:48,720
-Big day, innit? Of course.
-Yeah.
145
00:07:53,200 --> 00:07:56,920
Ah! Never noticed
that tree before.
146
00:07:56,960 --> 00:08:00,360
Only things you notice when
your freedom's at stake, innit?
147
00:08:00,400 --> 00:08:02,160
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
148
00:08:02,200 --> 00:08:04,240
-Is jail tough?
-Depends who you are, mate.
149
00:08:04,280 --> 00:08:06,280
Not for me,
d'you know what I mean, like?
150
00:08:06,320 --> 00:08:09,920
Fucking jail's jail, innit?
You do your T.
151
00:08:09,960 --> 00:08:12,240
You ride it
and you duck out, like.
152
00:08:12,280 --> 00:08:16,120
-You, uh, packed
your jail bag yet?
-Good point.
153
00:08:16,160 --> 00:08:18,920
Make sure I've got
all the old jail essentials.
154
00:08:18,960 --> 00:08:22,600
Apart from the contraband shit,
of course. There's other
ways of getting that in there.
155
00:08:22,640 --> 00:08:25,320
Grindah said he went to
the hardest prison in England.
156
00:08:25,360 --> 00:08:27,680
-Yeah.
-That's why he got bullied.
157
00:08:27,720 --> 00:08:30,840
I didn't get bullied. They had
to move me to protect
the others.
158
00:08:30,880 --> 00:08:33,720
Yeah, they said he was on
a wing with all the sort
of snitches and paedos.
159
00:08:33,760 --> 00:08:35,840
Why is he constantly
saying that?
160
00:08:35,880 --> 00:08:39,680
-[drum and bass]
-Hold tight, the Hanworth
crew locked in, yeah?
161
00:08:39,720 --> 00:08:43,320
-Heston massive. Isleworth
crew. Were you there?
-Saint, saint.
162
00:08:43,360 --> 00:08:46,560
Just a reminder of the change
of schedule tomorrow.
163
00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:52,000
We're gonna be down at court,
so DJ Steves will be doing
an 8-hour marathon set.
164
00:08:52,040 --> 00:08:54,240
-Trust me!
-Make sure you
lock in for that one.
165
00:08:54,280 --> 00:08:57,920
We'll be leaving you in
the capable hands of Stevie!
166
00:08:57,960 --> 00:09:00,320
Innit, Steves?
Tomorrow, the set?
167
00:09:00,360 --> 00:09:02,720
-Yeah?
-Definitely. Good to go.
168
00:09:02,760 --> 00:09:05,040
-He's knows what
he's fucking doing.
-Grindah.
169
00:09:05,080 --> 00:09:07,160
-Got that.
-What's that?
170
00:09:07,200 --> 00:09:10,440
-It's my little plan.
-Oh, planned and
everything? Good man.
171
00:09:10,480 --> 00:09:12,800
Yeah, I can plan things,
like, when I need to.
172
00:09:12,840 --> 00:09:16,400
Like, if I put my mind
to something, I can
normally...do it.
173
00:09:16,440 --> 00:09:19,400
Once I went to Glastonbury.
Didn't have a ticket.
174
00:09:19,440 --> 00:09:22,240
Spent two days digging
under the fence.
175
00:09:22,280 --> 00:09:26,040
Managed to catch the last
two hours. All for free.
176
00:09:26,080 --> 00:09:28,440
Hold tight, the crew inside,
yeah?
177
00:09:28,480 --> 00:09:32,840
Big up anyone who ain't heard.
I will going down court
tomorrow.
178
00:09:32,880 --> 00:09:36,480
Because dirty Babylon, yeah,
are trying to take me
down yet again.
179
00:09:36,520 --> 00:09:38,840
-D'you know what I mean?
-Bung down Babylon.
180
00:09:38,880 --> 00:09:41,360
Feel free to come down
and smash up the place.
181
00:09:41,400 --> 00:09:44,280
Don't say "smash up the place",
cos they'll trace it back
to me, you freak!
182
00:09:44,320 --> 00:09:48,360
Don't smash up the place,
but just come down with, like,
placards and banners,
183
00:09:48,400 --> 00:09:52,440
and fucking megaphones and all
that, d'you know what I mean,
like? Yeah, should be good.
184
00:09:59,080 --> 00:10:01,360
Good day's work.
185
00:10:08,560 --> 00:10:12,160
-You all right, Craigie?
-Yeah, I'm good.
186
00:10:12,200 --> 00:10:17,840
Hey...nice room you've got here,
mate. Cool posters.
187
00:10:19,520 --> 00:10:22,840
Listen, um...
Uncle Chabsie just wanted
188
00:10:22,880 --> 00:10:25,760
to have a word with you,
if that's all right?
189
00:10:25,800 --> 00:10:28,960
You don't have to be worried
about the baby, okay?
190
00:10:29,000 --> 00:10:32,240
-Kevin loves you
very, very much.
-What?!
191
00:10:32,280 --> 00:10:36,280
Don't be embarrassed, mate.
Hold that baby tight
to your bosom.
192
00:10:36,320 --> 00:10:41,920
Okay? That little baby will
cherish the nourishments
from your bosoms
193
00:10:41,960 --> 00:10:44,480
for a thousand lifetimes.
194
00:10:46,720 --> 00:10:48,320
-Okay?
-Yeah.
195
00:10:48,360 --> 00:10:50,440
Just think about it, mate.
196
00:10:50,480 --> 00:10:52,240
[sighs]
197
00:10:54,760 --> 00:10:56,760
Hey, Craigie.
198
00:10:56,800 --> 00:10:58,640
Cherish it.
199
00:11:02,440 --> 00:11:04,520
Goodnight, mate.
200
00:11:04,560 --> 00:11:06,960
What you doing, man?
Leave the light on!
201
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:09,520
-A bit of that, yeah, yeah.
-Oi, I can't believe, like,
202
00:11:09,560 --> 00:11:13,080
it's actually happening.
Do you think you will
get sent down?
203
00:11:13,120 --> 00:11:16,440
Ah, you never know with
these things, you know?
Only time will tell.
204
00:11:16,480 --> 00:11:18,760
It does happen, man.
Remember Fat Pete?
205
00:11:18,800 --> 00:11:21,840
The other week, he went down
for a little driving thing.
206
00:11:21,880 --> 00:11:26,200
What do you mean "he went
down for a driving thing"?
You can't just go down for...
207
00:11:26,240 --> 00:11:29,040
-Yeah, he was trying to
dispute it or something.
-That's bollocks.
208
00:11:29,080 --> 00:11:31,560
Decoy, you can't get sent
down just for a little thing?
209
00:11:31,600 --> 00:11:35,040
-Yeah, definitely. Fully.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
-Fully sent down?
210
00:11:35,080 --> 00:11:37,880
My mate Darren was saying
that if you've got previous,
211
00:11:37,920 --> 00:11:41,200
-apparently you get
a harsher sentence.
-I've had previous!
212
00:11:41,240 --> 00:11:42,360
Yeah.
213
00:11:44,880 --> 00:11:47,600
I don't know what to do, man.
I'm sorry.
214
00:11:47,640 --> 00:11:49,880
-It's all right...
-Look, if you do go down,
215
00:11:49,920 --> 00:11:53,120
we'll look after radio.
You've got nothing
to worry about.
216
00:11:53,160 --> 00:11:55,720
Me and Steves will... Anything
you leave, like, anything.
217
00:11:55,760 --> 00:11:58,800
Fuck off me. I'm not getting
fucking sent down for dropping
a cigarette on the floor.
218
00:11:58,840 --> 00:12:02,000
That would be fucking mental.
Wouldn't it?
219
00:12:06,160 --> 00:12:09,400
-That bit's still out though.
-Yeah, I know.
220
00:12:09,440 --> 00:12:11,760
There's a little bit that's out.
221
00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:14,880
-I just wanna make sure
everything's...
-Yeah, I know. It is. Look.
222
00:12:14,920 --> 00:12:16,560
-Smart? Yeah?
-Yeah.
223
00:12:16,600 --> 00:12:18,000
Thanks.
224
00:12:25,160 --> 00:12:27,240
Not too tight. I'm going to
have the Avirex on over this.
225
00:12:29,760 --> 00:12:33,840
Just don't make it any worse.
Just plead guilty and pay
the £80 original fine.
226
00:12:33,880 --> 00:12:37,680
-That's all you need to do.
-I'm not pleading guilty.
Guilty means automatic prison.
227
00:12:37,720 --> 00:12:40,120
Stop putting things in my head.
I can't concentrate.
228
00:12:40,160 --> 00:12:43,920
You're not gonna go prison.
The less you argue, the less
the fine will be.
229
00:12:43,960 --> 00:12:47,760
-Just think about the wedding.
-Fuck the wedding! This is my
happiness we're talking about.
230
00:12:47,800 --> 00:12:50,440
It's my life!
231
00:12:50,480 --> 00:12:53,200
What do you reckon, boys?
Is that all right?
232
00:12:59,440 --> 00:13:01,600
-See you later.
-Bye.
233
00:13:03,560 --> 00:13:05,720
[drum and bass plays]
234
00:13:05,760 --> 00:13:10,520
[Nan] You're locked into
the sounds of DJ Steves.
235
00:13:10,560 --> 00:13:12,400
Shout out my nan.
236
00:13:14,400 --> 00:13:18,080
Thanks for the care package.
It's given me everything I need
237
00:13:18,120 --> 00:13:20,240
to get through the day.
238
00:13:22,520 --> 00:13:25,520
Coming up over the next
eight hours, we will be
bringing you...
239
00:13:25,560 --> 00:13:28,280
vocal garage, speed garage,
240
00:13:28,320 --> 00:13:30,720
garage, dance-hype garage.
241
00:13:30,760 --> 00:13:32,680
Grime.
242
00:13:32,720 --> 00:13:35,800
Jungle. Dub Boy for Decoy.
Shout Decoy!
243
00:13:35,840 --> 00:13:38,040
Drum and bass.
244
00:13:38,080 --> 00:13:41,880
And some various hardcore
tunes, the only ones
Grindah likes.
245
00:13:49,480 --> 00:13:51,960
[coughs]
246
00:13:53,840 --> 00:13:55,720
Right.
247
00:13:55,760 --> 00:13:59,240
You've got to use what's around.
You've got to be creative.
248
00:14:01,280 --> 00:14:03,760
I could transform this.
249
00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:06,680
I see things right now
you'll never see in
your life. Look at this.
250
00:14:06,720 --> 00:14:09,600
-What do you think that is?
-It's a watering can.
251
00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:11,760
-Is it?
-Yeah.
252
00:14:11,800 --> 00:14:15,160
Yeah? You know what I see?
It's a loud speaker.
253
00:14:15,200 --> 00:14:17,160
Hello.
254
00:14:17,200 --> 00:14:19,720
Very simple
way of thinking you have.
255
00:14:22,160 --> 00:14:24,280
How come you're not
down the courthouse
256
00:14:24,320 --> 00:14:27,080
with the rest of the Grindah
appreciation society?
257
00:14:27,120 --> 00:14:29,880
I like to stay away from
courtrooms, just in general.
258
00:14:29,920 --> 00:14:33,440
They ask too many questions.
"What's your name?" You know.
259
00:14:33,480 --> 00:14:36,640
So I like to keep my head down,
stay off the radar.
260
00:14:38,120 --> 00:14:42,600
Oh! Very nice. Very daring.
[laughs]
261
00:14:42,640 --> 00:14:46,000
-Are you finished upstairs?
-Yeah. I'll crack on.
262
00:14:46,040 --> 00:14:48,000
Got a bit more to do.
263
00:14:59,000 --> 00:15:02,320
I dunno. What do you reckon?
Done up or undone?
264
00:15:02,360 --> 00:15:05,720
-Maybe just not wear it
at all, man.
-But it's a £200 jacket, man!
265
00:15:05,760 --> 00:15:08,120
I'm trying to look
as smart as possible.
266
00:15:08,160 --> 00:15:12,760
Easy. Got you a Maccys
with 20 nuggets
for, like, your last meal.
267
00:15:12,800 --> 00:15:17,400
It's not my last meal!
Stop going on like
I'm going to jail constantly.
268
00:15:17,440 --> 00:15:20,360
Actually, let me have
the chips. I'm feeling
a bit light-headed.
269
00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:23,320
Quick! Quick!
270
00:15:23,360 --> 00:15:26,200
I can't eat, I can't eat.
Take it.
271
00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:29,160
-Good morning.
-Name?
272
00:15:29,200 --> 00:15:31,400
Erm, Tony.
273
00:15:31,440 --> 00:15:36,000
-Er...Zagrofoff.
-What?!
274
00:15:36,040 --> 00:15:39,040
Zagrofoff. There's nothing
wrong with it. It's Greek.
275
00:15:41,480 --> 00:15:43,840
All good?
276
00:15:46,160 --> 00:15:49,360
Could I...have a quick word,
please, mate?
277
00:15:49,400 --> 00:15:51,320
Erm...
278
00:15:51,360 --> 00:15:53,880
Is there any way we could
just call this all off?
279
00:15:53,920 --> 00:15:56,600
I've got 80 quid on me now
and we could just save
everybody's time.
280
00:15:56,640 --> 00:15:59,040
-I can't do that, I'm afraid.
-Yeah...
281
00:15:59,080 --> 00:16:02,040
I get where you're coming from,
but no one has to know, yeah?
282
00:16:02,080 --> 00:16:04,480
Just, literally,
ignore the envelope.
283
00:16:04,520 --> 00:16:07,320
Ah! Can you make your way
to Court 4, please?
284
00:16:07,360 --> 00:16:10,040
-Please, there's 80 quid in
there. You can have that...
-Court 4.
285
00:16:10,080 --> 00:16:13,480
All right, all right,
get off me!
286
00:16:13,520 --> 00:16:16,040
Bang them doors, brother!
Free Grindah!
287
00:16:16,080 --> 00:16:17,960
-Stop saying...
-Bang them doors!
288
00:16:18,000 --> 00:16:20,280
I haven't even got doors yet!
Stop saying that.
289
00:16:20,320 --> 00:16:22,920
[director] How would
you do in jail?
290
00:16:22,960 --> 00:16:25,760
I'd be all right, cos last
time Grindah went jail, right,
291
00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:27,800
I actually learnt
how to plug things.
292
00:16:27,840 --> 00:16:30,120
What do you mean
by "plug things"?
293
00:16:30,160 --> 00:16:32,440
Plugging.
294
00:16:32,480 --> 00:16:35,120
You put things in a condom
295
00:16:35,160 --> 00:16:37,200
and you plug it.
296
00:16:37,240 --> 00:16:40,200
-Oh, what? Up...?
-Yeah, I've got
an N-gauge up there.
297
00:16:40,240 --> 00:16:44,480
-A whole N-gauge?
-Yeah. And a charger.
298
00:16:53,840 --> 00:16:56,440
Are you worried about
Grindah's fine?
299
00:16:56,480 --> 00:16:59,680
Yeah, I really don't want it
to affect the wedding budget.
300
00:16:59,720 --> 00:17:03,480
So I reckon if I could just
sell a few things and
I could make the £80,
301
00:17:03,520 --> 00:17:06,400
we won't have to cut back
on any essentials.
302
00:17:06,440 --> 00:17:09,680
Like I'm really worrying about
the cost of pony rental now.
303
00:17:16,080 --> 00:17:19,120
Nothing like a good bit
of carpentry.
304
00:17:19,160 --> 00:17:21,880
Very holy. Like Jesus, isn't it?
305
00:17:21,920 --> 00:17:24,680
Very good with wood.
[laughs]
306
00:17:27,080 --> 00:17:29,280
This will go on here.
307
00:17:29,320 --> 00:17:31,920
Keep the baby nice and safe.
308
00:17:31,960 --> 00:17:34,960
The other thing
about this cot, yeah?
309
00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:38,160
They can stick this bad boy
out in the garden, yeah?
Nice bit of weather.
310
00:17:38,200 --> 00:17:41,440
Have a lovely barbecue, mate.
Do you want a burger, mate?
311
00:17:41,480 --> 00:17:46,240
[laughs] Get the Pimm-ps, mate!
Let's have a nice glass
of Pimm-ps.
312
00:17:46,280 --> 00:17:49,240
Two in one. Barbecue grill.
313
00:17:51,160 --> 00:17:53,200
Baby's cot.
314
00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:55,680
Just hold that bit.
315
00:17:55,720 --> 00:17:58,080
Baby's cot.
316
00:17:58,120 --> 00:18:00,840
[drum and bass plays]
317
00:18:09,360 --> 00:18:12,000
It's lovely when
it doesn't overflow.
318
00:18:13,920 --> 00:18:15,440
Right.
319
00:18:15,480 --> 00:18:18,160
Locked into the sounds
of DJ Steves.
320
00:18:18,200 --> 00:18:23,360
Taking you through, we've got...
a little bit of grime
coming up for you.
321
00:18:23,400 --> 00:18:26,040
Sorry. No, we've got jungle
coming up for you.
322
00:18:26,080 --> 00:18:28,680
Oh, my God, no fucking way!
323
00:18:28,720 --> 00:18:30,840
No! No!
324
00:18:30,880 --> 00:18:34,400
Fucking hell!
It's gone in my eyes.
325
00:18:34,440 --> 00:18:36,800
It's in my eyes.
I've got piss in my eyes.
326
00:18:38,640 --> 00:18:43,120
Fuck's sake! The list is fucked
and I'm covered in piss.
327
00:18:43,160 --> 00:18:46,360
Should've just gone fucking
toilet. It's only there.
328
00:18:49,040 --> 00:18:51,600
I can't sit around any more.
I've got to be in there, man.
329
00:18:51,640 --> 00:18:53,680
-I'm gonna wait outside, yeah?
-Yeah?
330
00:18:53,720 --> 00:18:55,880
-Sure?
-Yeah, yeah, yeah.
331
00:18:55,920 --> 00:18:59,960
If Grindah goes jail, yeah,
and Kurupt FM dies,
332
00:19:00,000 --> 00:19:04,120
it's not just me or the Kurupt
FM boys that are let down.
333
00:19:04,160 --> 00:19:07,800
But it's the listener
and I think that's what
hurts the most.
334
00:19:07,840 --> 00:19:11,360
Just knowing that there's,
like, tens of hun...
335
00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:15,080
Ten to a hundred listeners
all locked on,
336
00:19:15,120 --> 00:19:18,280
like, just waiting
for their favourite MC.
337
00:19:18,320 --> 00:19:20,560
And he's not there any more.
338
00:19:20,600 --> 00:19:22,520
[Grindah] My head
was all clouded.
339
00:19:22,560 --> 00:19:25,840
Please, can I just, please,
pay the original fine? Look.
340
00:19:25,880 --> 00:19:29,240
-I've got it here.
-Mr Zografoss, please, sit down.
341
00:19:29,280 --> 00:19:31,920
-Can you just take it?
-Mr Zografoss!
342
00:19:31,960 --> 00:19:35,120
-Stop saying
my surname constantly.
-Mr Zagrofoff!
343
00:19:35,160 --> 00:19:36,320
"Mr Zagrofoff".
344
00:19:36,360 --> 00:19:39,000
[Steves] Oh, fuck!
345
00:19:39,040 --> 00:19:41,480
All right, fucking hell.
346
00:19:41,520 --> 00:19:44,560
I don't know what... Ah...
Where's the coke?
347
00:19:44,600 --> 00:19:48,080
I don't know what I'm
supposed to play next.
348
00:19:48,120 --> 00:19:51,200
It's got to be... Fuck off!
349
00:19:51,240 --> 00:19:52,480
No!
350
00:19:52,520 --> 00:19:55,280
This'll do, this'll do!
351
00:19:55,320 --> 00:19:58,160
[sighs]
This will do.
352
00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:02,400
Right, you know what?
353
00:20:03,640 --> 00:20:06,880
Emergency situation calls...
354
00:20:06,920 --> 00:20:10,520
for my little emergency helper.
355
00:20:10,560 --> 00:20:14,640
Acid.
We're gonna be all right.
We're gonna be all right.
356
00:20:14,680 --> 00:20:18,160
Yeah, your brain can get tired,
but you only use
357
00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:20,840
a small percentage
of your brain.
358
00:20:20,880 --> 00:20:23,840
And if you take acid,
for example,
359
00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:28,280
you can actually access
different other bits
of your brain,
360
00:20:28,320 --> 00:20:30,480
bits that aren't as tired.
361
00:20:30,520 --> 00:20:32,080
Steves!
362
00:20:33,960 --> 00:20:36,520
It's like with a plane.
363
00:20:36,560 --> 00:20:39,480
You have, like, another engine.
364
00:20:39,520 --> 00:20:44,760
If one engine fails, then
the other engines will come on,
the spare engines.
365
00:20:44,800 --> 00:20:48,400
If you turn them all on,
fucking hell,
you're flying, mate.
366
00:20:50,480 --> 00:20:52,480
Aah, sorry.
367
00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:58,280
Door open. Follow my voice,
follow my voice.
368
00:20:58,320 --> 00:21:01,160
-Through this, through this.
-No comment, no comment.
369
00:21:01,200 --> 00:21:03,680
All right, you're out.
Everybody, stand back!
370
00:21:03,720 --> 00:21:06,160
-I don't think you're gonna
need that jacket, bruv.
-What?
371
00:21:06,200 --> 00:21:09,080
Where's all the press and shit?
You...
372
00:21:09,120 --> 00:21:11,960
-I dunno. I think the clocks
went back a few weeks ago.
-Oh, is it?
373
00:21:12,000 --> 00:21:15,560
You boys are gonna have to film
this, cos the news crews must
have got it mixed up.
374
00:21:15,600 --> 00:21:18,840
You lot can pick it up,
send it over to 'em.
Pop yourself down there.
375
00:21:18,880 --> 00:21:22,400
Got the court in the background,
yeah? Okay.
376
00:21:22,440 --> 00:21:25,280
-Ready?
-Go.
377
00:21:25,320 --> 00:21:30,320
I would just like to say,
on behalf of myself,
my family and the BBC,
378
00:21:30,360 --> 00:21:33,840
-that justice has been served
in Brentford today.
-Yes.
379
00:21:33,880 --> 00:21:38,120
Hold tight the judge and big
up everyone that's been there
for me in these dark times.
380
00:21:38,160 --> 00:21:40,600
I've escaped jail and
I'm once again a free man.
381
00:21:40,640 --> 00:21:42,920
-Feels good to be out.
-Feels great.
382
00:21:42,960 --> 00:21:45,960
-[both] Amen.
-I'll be making no further
comments on this occasion.
383
00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:48,640
Give my client a bit of space,
please.
384
00:21:48,680 --> 00:21:51,760
-Have you still
got those nuggets?
-No, me and Decoy twosed them.
385
00:21:51,800 --> 00:21:55,520
Ah. I'm free! I beat the case!
386
00:21:55,560 --> 00:21:57,280
I beat it!
387
00:21:59,520 --> 00:22:01,960
Daddy's back.
388
00:22:02,000 --> 00:22:05,120
-So how much was it?
-How much was it?!
389
00:22:05,160 --> 00:22:07,720
Look at her. So selfish.
I nearly went prison.
390
00:22:07,760 --> 00:22:09,880
Obviously, I'm glad you didn't,
but how much?
391
00:22:09,920 --> 00:22:12,600
Well, surprise, surprise.
You get your £80 back.
392
00:22:12,640 --> 00:22:14,800
What? How? That's amazing.
393
00:22:14,840 --> 00:22:18,680
Cos, basically, you've got
to read this instead,
apparently.
394
00:22:18,720 --> 00:22:22,280
Where is it? There you go.
Yeah, some sort of...
395
00:22:22,320 --> 00:22:26,280
I did try asking for a tag
instead, but, um...
396
00:22:26,320 --> 00:22:30,840
Yeah, apparently, they don't
do trades, so... Yeah,
it's just on the next page.
397
00:22:30,880 --> 00:22:35,280
-[sighs]
-What? £700?!
398
00:22:35,320 --> 00:22:38,840
-Why is it so much?
-I don't know.
399
00:22:38,880 --> 00:22:42,240
But you can't really put
a price on freedom, can ya?
400
00:22:42,280 --> 00:22:46,440
If you could, it'd be
more than 700, mate.
It'd be about ten grand, so...
401
00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:49,360
-You're lucky.
-[Miche sighs]
402
00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:55,440
Well, anyway,
it's done now, innit?
403
00:22:57,600 --> 00:23:01,560
-[drum and bass plays]
-It's in here. Where'd it go?
404
00:23:01,600 --> 00:23:05,600
It's in the walls!
I can hear it in the walls!
405
00:23:05,640 --> 00:23:07,560
Uuuh!
406
00:23:11,720 --> 00:23:14,160
Can you hear the scratching?
407
00:23:14,200 --> 00:23:16,160
Maybe it's trying
to communicate.
408
00:23:18,520 --> 00:23:20,200
Tia!
409
00:23:21,960 --> 00:23:23,760
Yeah, that's £2, please.
410
00:23:23,800 --> 00:23:26,160
Hold on a minute.
You're selling peanuts?
411
00:23:26,200 --> 00:23:28,440
You know that's my thing.
Copycat.
412
00:23:28,480 --> 00:23:30,840
You just add a bit of spice
to some normal nuts
413
00:23:30,880 --> 00:23:32,880
-and charge double the price!
-What?
414
00:23:32,920 --> 00:23:35,320
[director]
So how did you find Tia?
415
00:23:35,360 --> 00:23:37,880
Tia was, uh, you know,
she just wandered in.
416
00:23:37,920 --> 00:23:40,480
And I just gave her
a quick interview.
417
00:23:40,520 --> 00:23:42,480
And that was it, you know.
I saw that she had
418
00:23:42,520 --> 00:23:45,920
the same street savvy
entrepreneurship that I have.
419
00:23:45,960 --> 00:23:48,480
Gourmet peanuts, £3. Eh? Eh?
420
00:23:48,520 --> 00:23:51,680
-She wanted to get
into the food game.
-But you don't make food.
421
00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:53,960
We don't make food yet,
but we will,
422
00:23:54,000 --> 00:23:56,200
because she has
a lot of dreams. She's
very ambitious, like I am.
423
00:23:56,240 --> 00:23:58,480
Okay, we need to
sort out the kitchen,
424
00:23:58,520 --> 00:24:01,200
which means I need the metal
bit for the grill.
425
00:24:01,240 --> 00:24:03,120
The metal bit?
What is that not in here?
426
00:24:03,160 --> 00:24:05,360
-Yeah, it's missing.
-What?!
427
00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:08,360
No! No, I haven't seen it.
It was here, wasn't it?
Where's it gone?
428
00:24:08,400 --> 00:24:11,440
Someone must have taken it.
429
00:24:11,480 --> 00:24:14,520
Abdi, Abdi. Abdi must have.
430
00:24:23,800 --> 00:24:27,800
I mean, this is weird
even for him, right?
431
00:24:27,840 --> 00:24:31,520
Who are they meant to be?
432
00:24:31,560 --> 00:24:33,760
She's got tits.
433
00:24:33,800 --> 00:24:37,560
He's got his tongue fallen off
and two teeth in
a gaping mouth.
434
00:24:37,600 --> 00:24:39,640
What is it?
435
00:24:39,680 --> 00:24:42,600
Has he cut my
fucking curtains up?
436
00:24:42,640 --> 00:24:44,400
Look at it! It's fucked!
437
00:24:46,800 --> 00:24:50,720
Is that...?
Is that a fucking grill?
438
00:24:50,760 --> 00:24:54,400
[director] Do you think
you'll get Chabuddy
to do more work for you?
439
00:24:54,440 --> 00:24:56,760
Yes, I'm gonna get Chabuddy
to do more work.
440
00:24:56,800 --> 00:25:00,680
The first thing he's gonna
do is paint over this
fucking monstrosity.
441
00:25:03,760 --> 00:25:06,200
[fades music down]
442
00:25:06,240 --> 00:25:08,720
This is an SOS.
443
00:25:08,760 --> 00:25:11,680
We've reached the day
of reckoning, people.
444
00:25:11,720 --> 00:25:16,240
The Illuminati...
are everywhere.
445
00:25:16,280 --> 00:25:19,480
The symbol of the Illuminati
is the all-seeing eye.
446
00:25:19,520 --> 00:25:23,880
And if you look carefully,
you can see eyes everywhere.
447
00:25:27,600 --> 00:25:30,320
Ugh, fucking hell!
448
00:25:30,360 --> 00:25:33,600
-What the fuck's that playing?
-It stinks of piss, Steves.
449
00:25:33,640 --> 00:25:36,360
-I should've known. Steve mate!
-What's going on, man?
450
00:25:36,400 --> 00:25:39,480
You've had one of your episodes
again. Just... What're
you doing?
451
00:25:39,520 --> 00:25:42,480
Just calm down, mate.
Get away from the decks.
452
00:25:42,520 --> 00:25:45,480
Steves, just get away from...
Ugh! Why are you wet?
453
00:25:45,520 --> 00:25:48,680
You fucking stink as well!
Get off me! Come on, mate.
454
00:25:48,720 --> 00:25:52,240
-You been eight hours?
-Very pungent smell in here.
455
00:25:52,280 --> 00:25:55,360
-You're done, mate. It's over.
-What day is it today?
456
00:25:55,400 --> 00:25:59,360
-Are we finished?
-We're done. You're done.
You're over. All right, mate.
457
00:25:59,400 --> 00:26:02,080
Yeah, well done, Steves, mate.
You done really well.
458
00:26:02,120 --> 00:26:05,520
-I did it!
-You did it, mate, yeah.
459
00:26:05,560 --> 00:26:09,480
Let's get you through...
We need to just get you out
of the room for a sec.
460
00:26:09,520 --> 00:26:11,400
Shall I lock him
in the bathroom?
461
00:26:11,440 --> 00:26:13,440
Yeah, wash his face as well.
Usually calms him down.
462
00:26:13,480 --> 00:26:16,280
-Are you washing my face?
-Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
463
00:26:16,320 --> 00:26:20,640
-Come on.
-[Beats] Yeah, Steves does
struggle with the longer sets.
464
00:26:20,680 --> 00:26:23,400
-I think he gets overwhelmed.
-Yeah, he does.
465
00:26:23,440 --> 00:26:26,880
It's mainly the daytime ones,
cos he ain't really used to it.
466
00:26:26,920 --> 00:26:29,680
I think it just throws up
his body clock a little bit.
467
00:26:29,720 --> 00:26:34,560
-Oh, so it's happened before?
-Yeah. Like, one time he fucking
just burnt his bed down.
468
00:26:34,600 --> 00:26:37,000
Cos he decided he never
wanted to sleep again.
469
00:26:37,040 --> 00:26:39,920
-That's why he sleeps
on the floor now.
-Yeah.
470
00:26:39,960 --> 00:26:43,400
I just want to take this moment
for your listening pleasure.
471
00:26:43,440 --> 00:26:46,120
-That's my intro.
-Fresh out the pen.
472
00:26:46,160 --> 00:26:48,080
Mc Grindah.
473
00:26:51,840 --> 00:26:55,440
Sounds of the...sounds of the...
sounds of the MC Grindah!
474
00:26:55,480 --> 00:26:59,600
Mic check one, two.
Aka the white Mandela.
475
00:26:59,640 --> 00:27:02,480
Aka you can never hold me down.
476
00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:06,200
Aka I'm finally free
from persecution.
477
00:27:06,240 --> 00:27:09,440
Ah, feels great to hear
the sound of my own voice again.
478
00:27:09,480 --> 00:27:12,880
-Shall I run the...?
-Run the rhythm!
479
00:27:12,920 --> 00:27:16,640
Basically, yeah, us and the law
has been an on-going battle
from day dot.
480
00:27:16,680 --> 00:27:19,880
It's almost like a game
that you can't win or lose.
481
00:27:19,920 --> 00:27:23,720
-It just sort of continues.
-Oh, you can lose.
You can go to jail.
482
00:27:23,760 --> 00:27:26,320
Yeah, and if you pay
a massive fine as well.
483
00:27:26,360 --> 00:27:30,800
-I didn't pay the fine,
so I still win.
-Well done, mate.
484
00:27:36,880 --> 00:27:42,080
This is Grindah's favourite
jacket. This is his, like,
signature style.
485
00:27:42,120 --> 00:27:45,960
You could wear this,
you know, from the '30s
to the modern day.
486
00:27:46,000 --> 00:27:47,920
Like, this is a timeless
piece of fashion.
487
00:27:47,960 --> 00:27:50,960
But we need to sell it.
488
00:27:54,120 --> 00:27:56,680
I don't think Grindah's
gonna be happy about it,
489
00:27:56,720 --> 00:27:59,240
but I just think,
deep down, this is actually
490
00:27:59,280 --> 00:28:02,520
what he wants me to do, so that
he can have the most beautiful,
491
00:28:02,560 --> 00:28:05,240
like, perfect wedding day,
the best day of his life.
492
00:28:07,200 --> 00:28:10,000
And we don't have
to tell him straight away.
493
00:28:14,240 --> 00:28:16,240
It's good to have
you back, mate.
494
00:28:16,280 --> 00:28:18,800
-It's good to have me
back too, mate.
-Cheers, mate.
495
00:28:18,840 --> 00:28:22,000
I can't believe I was like
this close to being in
a fucking cell, like.
496
00:28:22,040 --> 00:28:26,160
Some tiny little room just
surrounded by bare little
weird brares and that.
497
00:28:27,960 --> 00:28:30,480
[Grindah] We're free men, yeah?
498
00:28:30,520 --> 00:28:34,680
We will not be ridiculously
subjected to your stupid
little man made-up laws, mate.
499
00:28:34,720 --> 00:28:37,000
Exactly. Subject your law
and stick it up your arse!
500
00:28:37,040 --> 00:28:38,600
-Trust me!
-Fuck the system!
501
00:28:38,640 --> 00:28:40,920
Fuck the system!
Fuck the police, yeah?
502
00:28:40,960 --> 00:28:43,280
-Exactly.
-Trust me.
503
00:28:43,320 --> 00:28:45,320
-Actually, I might...
-Yeah, you should
probably get that.
39714
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