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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162 Translated By The Community Of WWW.MY-SUBS.COM 1 00:00:01,400 --> 00:00:03,130 ADULT SHELDON: In any ecosystem, 2 00:00:03,140 --> 00:00:07,759 you'll find a delicate balance between predator and prey. 3 00:00:07,760 --> 00:00:09,519 Some well-known predators 4 00:00:09,520 --> 00:00:12,559 include Panthera leo, 5 00:00:12,560 --> 00:00:14,229 Ursus arctos, 6 00:00:14,230 --> 00:00:17,449 and star of the 1987 film Predator, 7 00:00:17,450 --> 00:00:19,250 Predator. 8 00:00:19,260 --> 00:00:21,109 Now, examples of prey 9 00:00:21,110 --> 00:00:24,389 include Oryctolagus cuniculus, 10 00:00:24,390 --> 00:00:26,490 Gallus gallus domesticus, 11 00:00:26,500 --> 00:00:29,409 and weighing in at 58 pounds soaking wet, 12 00:00:29,410 --> 00:00:31,429 Diminutive homo novus... 13 00:00:31,430 --> 00:00:33,459 Curiously, a close relative 14 00:00:33,460 --> 00:00:36,000 of Gallus gallus domesticus. 15 00:00:36,010 --> 00:00:37,300 ♪ Two, three, four ♪ 16 00:00:37,310 --> 00:00:39,409 ["FIX ME" BY BLACK FLAG PLAYS] 17 00:00:39,410 --> 00:00:42,079 [KIDS SHOUTING] 18 00:00:42,080 --> 00:00:44,520 ♪ Fix me, fix my head ♪ 19 00:00:44,530 --> 00:00:46,970 ♪ Fix me please, I don't want to be dead... ♪ 20 00:00:47,970 --> 00:00:49,139 LUIS: Cooper. 21 00:00:49,140 --> 00:00:50,549 Your stop. 22 00:00:50,550 --> 00:00:54,189 Would you mind dropping me off closer to my house? 23 00:00:54,190 --> 00:00:56,159 You know I'm not allowed to do that. 24 00:00:56,160 --> 00:00:58,159 What if I did your taxes? 25 00:00:58,160 --> 00:00:59,770 Sorry, kiddo. 26 00:01:03,570 --> 00:01:06,330 I could've gotten you a nice refund. 27 00:01:06,340 --> 00:01:07,679 ADULT SHELDON: The perilous journey 28 00:01:07,680 --> 00:01:09,769 from the bus stop to my front door 29 00:01:09,770 --> 00:01:12,439 was 97.5 meters. 30 00:01:12,440 --> 00:01:15,420 FYI, insisting on using the metric system 31 00:01:15,430 --> 00:01:18,980 in East Texas is another reason I was hunted by predators. 32 00:01:31,560 --> 00:01:33,760 ♪ ♪ 33 00:01:50,180 --> 00:01:53,180 [PANTING] Homo novus needs a Yoo-hoo. 34 00:01:54,830 --> 00:01:57,799 ♪ Nobody else is stronger than I am ♪ 35 00:01:57,800 --> 00:02:00,600 ♪ Yesterday I moved a mountain ♪ 36 00:02:00,610 --> 00:02:03,209 ♪ I bet I could be your hero ♪ 37 00:02:03,210 --> 00:02:06,110 ♪ I am a mighty little man ♪ 38 00:02:06,120 --> 00:02:12,820 - Synced and corrected by VitoSilans - -- www.MY-SUBS.com -- 39 00:02:18,370 --> 00:02:19,670 Jiu-jitsu? 40 00:02:19,680 --> 00:02:22,579 I've decided to learn self-defense. 41 00:02:22,580 --> 00:02:24,379 - Why? - I'm quite small, 42 00:02:24,380 --> 00:02:26,649 and will be for several years, 43 00:02:26,650 --> 00:02:28,649 maybe even more if I'm a late bloomer. 44 00:02:28,650 --> 00:02:31,219 Your dad's big, maybe you'll take after him. 45 00:02:31,220 --> 00:02:32,589 We both like my mom. 46 00:02:32,590 --> 00:02:34,919 I think that's where the similarities end. 47 00:02:34,920 --> 00:02:36,620 You know, one of the books mentioned 48 00:02:36,630 --> 00:02:38,629 a Vietnamese martial art. 49 00:02:38,630 --> 00:02:40,829 Vovinam. I'm a blue belt. 50 00:02:40,830 --> 00:02:42,960 - Wow. - Don't be impressed. 51 00:02:42,970 --> 00:02:45,129 It's what you get when your mom buys the uniform. 52 00:02:45,130 --> 00:02:46,899 Do you remember any of it? 53 00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:49,580 I don't even know where the belt is. 54 00:02:52,680 --> 00:02:53,839 The book says jiu-jitsu 55 00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:55,679 is based on using your attacker's 56 00:02:55,680 --> 00:02:57,019 momentum against them. 57 00:02:57,020 --> 00:02:59,779 It's just physics. Come at me. 58 00:02:59,780 --> 00:03:01,649 Like, run at you? 59 00:03:01,650 --> 00:03:04,539 Well, I'm new to this, so maybe just walk quickly. 60 00:03:04,540 --> 00:03:06,100 And what happens when I get to you? 61 00:03:06,110 --> 00:03:08,419 I'll use your inertia to take you down. 62 00:03:08,420 --> 00:03:09,820 Okay. 63 00:03:09,830 --> 00:03:11,229 ♪ Hit it ♪ 64 00:03:11,230 --> 00:03:13,200 ♪ It takes two to make a thing go right ♪ 65 00:03:13,210 --> 00:03:15,359 [GRUNTING] 66 00:03:15,360 --> 00:03:17,969 And when does inertia take me down? 67 00:03:17,970 --> 00:03:19,929 [STRAINING]: Any second. 68 00:03:19,930 --> 00:03:22,129 ♪ I got an idea that I wanna share ♪ 69 00:03:22,130 --> 00:03:24,630 ♪ You don't like it, so what? I don't care... ♪ 70 00:03:24,640 --> 00:03:26,600 I don't understand. 71 00:03:26,610 --> 00:03:28,579 I'm using physics. 72 00:03:28,580 --> 00:03:29,930 [GRUNTING] 73 00:03:29,940 --> 00:03:32,110 ♪ All of my followers 'cause all I want is respect... ♪ 74 00:03:32,120 --> 00:03:35,780 This leg lock is called an Outside Ashi Garami. 75 00:03:35,790 --> 00:03:37,149 What happens next? 76 00:03:37,150 --> 00:03:39,680 That depends, is this your foot or mine? 77 00:03:39,690 --> 00:03:41,569 ♪ It takes two to make it outta sight. ♪ 78 00:03:41,570 --> 00:03:43,459 ♪ ♪ 79 00:03:43,460 --> 00:03:46,290 LUIS: Cooper. Your stop. 80 00:04:01,880 --> 00:04:03,540 [PANTING] 81 00:04:08,720 --> 00:04:10,150 Ahh. 82 00:04:11,790 --> 00:04:13,969 I bowled a new high score last night. 83 00:04:13,970 --> 00:04:15,150 Nice. 84 00:04:15,160 --> 00:04:18,360 - I got two turkeys. - What's a turkey? 85 00:04:18,370 --> 00:04:19,990 It's three strikes in a row. 86 00:04:20,000 --> 00:04:21,880 Why do they call it a turkey? 87 00:04:21,890 --> 00:04:25,669 Well, when they first invented bowling, 88 00:04:25,670 --> 00:04:29,060 they used to just throw frozen turkeys at the pins. 89 00:04:29,070 --> 00:04:31,479 Eventually, they switched to balls 90 00:04:31,480 --> 00:04:34,009 to cut down on the smell. 91 00:04:34,010 --> 00:04:35,640 Why you lying to her? 92 00:04:35,650 --> 00:04:38,079 I find it keeps my mind sharp. [CHUCKLES] 93 00:04:38,080 --> 00:04:40,210 Sheldon, breakfast! 94 00:04:40,220 --> 00:04:41,880 SHELDON: Be right there! 95 00:04:45,720 --> 00:04:47,859 MARY: Sheldon! 96 00:04:47,860 --> 00:04:50,220 Coming! 97 00:04:57,900 --> 00:04:59,170 [RUSTLING] 98 00:05:02,670 --> 00:05:04,209 Hello. 99 00:05:04,210 --> 00:05:05,780 MARY: Shelly, you all right? 100 00:05:05,790 --> 00:05:07,669 Yes. I must be a little sore 101 00:05:07,670 --> 00:05:10,379 from doing jiu-jitsu with Tam yesterday. 102 00:05:10,380 --> 00:05:12,199 Why were you doing jiu-jitsu? 103 00:05:12,200 --> 00:05:15,180 We're boys. Roughhousing is what we do. 104 00:05:16,920 --> 00:05:18,550 [POPPING] 105 00:05:20,420 --> 00:05:23,320 - What was that? - What was what? 106 00:05:23,330 --> 00:05:24,629 That sound. 107 00:05:24,630 --> 00:05:26,260 What sound? 108 00:05:26,270 --> 00:05:27,800 [POPPING] 109 00:05:32,020 --> 00:05:33,430 What's all this? 110 00:05:33,440 --> 00:05:36,069 An extra layer of protection. 111 00:05:36,070 --> 00:05:37,649 Protection from what? 112 00:05:37,650 --> 00:05:40,409 Sweetie, is someone bothering you? 113 00:05:40,410 --> 00:05:43,279 - Yes. - Who is it? 114 00:05:43,280 --> 00:05:45,049 I'd rather not talk about it. 115 00:05:45,050 --> 00:05:46,810 No, I want a name right now. 116 00:05:46,820 --> 00:05:48,029 Mary. 117 00:05:48,030 --> 00:05:49,319 Have you been hurting him? 118 00:05:49,320 --> 00:05:51,289 Only with my words. 119 00:05:51,290 --> 00:05:52,819 Tell me who it is, Shelly. 120 00:05:52,820 --> 00:05:54,050 Mary, slow down. 121 00:05:54,060 --> 00:05:55,720 Don't tell me to slow down. 122 00:05:55,730 --> 00:05:57,729 - Someone is bullying him. - Okay. 123 00:05:57,730 --> 00:05:59,269 Okay. 124 00:05:59,270 --> 00:06:01,739 Sheldon, you can't go to school wearing all that. 125 00:06:01,740 --> 00:06:03,180 Go to your room and take it off. 126 00:06:03,190 --> 00:06:04,519 Yes, sir. 127 00:06:04,520 --> 00:06:07,120 [RUSTLING, POPPING] 128 00:06:07,130 --> 00:06:08,669 You go with him. 129 00:06:08,670 --> 00:06:10,219 But my cereal's gonna get soggy. 130 00:06:10,220 --> 00:06:11,939 - Go. - [SIGHS] 131 00:06:11,940 --> 00:06:13,880 I'd like one nice morning. 132 00:06:16,080 --> 00:06:17,849 Why aren't you more upset about this? 133 00:06:17,850 --> 00:06:20,509 I am. I just think we should proceed with caution. 134 00:06:20,510 --> 00:06:23,329 - Someone is hurting our son. - I understand. 135 00:06:23,330 --> 00:06:25,319 But handling bullies is tricky. It... 136 00:06:25,320 --> 00:06:27,450 It's easy to make things worse. 137 00:06:27,460 --> 00:06:29,289 And what makes you the expert? 138 00:06:29,290 --> 00:06:32,229 Honey, I was a bully. 139 00:06:32,230 --> 00:06:33,529 MEEMAW: He's right. 140 00:06:33,530 --> 00:06:35,860 You get involved in this in the wrong way, 141 00:06:35,870 --> 00:06:38,799 and they'll take it out on Sheldon. 142 00:06:38,800 --> 00:06:41,550 Well, I'm sorry, but I can't just stand by. 143 00:06:48,280 --> 00:06:50,409 Georgie, I need to talk to you, and wake up, 144 00:06:50,410 --> 00:06:51,979 you're gonna be late. 145 00:06:51,980 --> 00:06:55,279 Got it covered. I slept in my clothes. 146 00:06:55,280 --> 00:06:58,420 Oh, Lord. Look, somebody has been picking on your brother. 147 00:06:58,430 --> 00:06:59,659 You know anything about it? 148 00:06:59,660 --> 00:07:00,769 No. 149 00:07:00,770 --> 00:07:03,320 You better not be covering for anybody. 150 00:07:03,330 --> 00:07:05,229 I'm not. Most kids at school ignore him, 151 00:07:05,230 --> 00:07:06,790 and the girls all think he's cute. 152 00:07:06,800 --> 00:07:08,259 It's kind of annoying. 153 00:07:08,260 --> 00:07:10,660 Well, I need you to look after him. 154 00:07:10,670 --> 00:07:11,679 Why? 155 00:07:11,680 --> 00:07:14,539 Because I'm your mother, and I'm asking you nicely. 156 00:07:14,540 --> 00:07:16,039 What if I don't want to? 157 00:07:16,040 --> 00:07:18,830 I don't care, you're doing it. 158 00:07:20,840 --> 00:07:22,609 How was that nice? 159 00:07:22,610 --> 00:07:25,379 So there I was flying above the city, 160 00:07:25,380 --> 00:07:27,749 but when I woke up, I couldn't fly. 161 00:07:27,750 --> 00:07:30,180 That's like the dream you had where you were dating Madonna, 162 00:07:30,190 --> 00:07:32,149 but when you woke up, you weren't. 163 00:07:32,150 --> 00:07:33,350 Exactly. 164 00:07:33,360 --> 00:07:35,659 You ever have the ones where your teeth are falling out? 165 00:07:35,660 --> 00:07:38,729 Better my teeth than my hair, but... 166 00:07:38,730 --> 00:07:41,599 - Sheldon? - Over here. 167 00:07:41,600 --> 00:07:44,060 - What are you doing? - Hiding. 168 00:07:44,070 --> 00:07:45,300 From who? 169 00:07:47,980 --> 00:07:50,009 Is Billy the one giving you trouble? 170 00:07:50,010 --> 00:07:51,109 No. 171 00:07:51,110 --> 00:07:53,209 His dad? 172 00:07:53,210 --> 00:07:54,919 No... 173 00:07:54,920 --> 00:07:57,449 ♪ ♪ 174 00:07:57,450 --> 00:07:58,720 No. 175 00:08:00,750 --> 00:08:02,620 She's a demon. 176 00:08:07,610 --> 00:08:09,329 The little Sparks girl? 177 00:08:09,330 --> 00:08:11,759 You're kidding. She seems so sweet. 178 00:08:11,760 --> 00:08:14,490 He says she slaps him around, takes his lunch money. 179 00:08:14,500 --> 00:08:16,989 She even put a tadpole down his shirt. 180 00:08:16,990 --> 00:08:20,310 Poor kid, he tucks in those shirts. 181 00:08:30,070 --> 00:08:32,669 - She looks harmless. - She's cute. 182 00:08:32,670 --> 00:08:34,969 So she probably gets away with stuff. 183 00:08:34,970 --> 00:08:36,650 I'm like that. 184 00:08:38,190 --> 00:08:40,450 I wonder if stray cats poop in that sandbox. 185 00:08:40,460 --> 00:08:41,660 MARY: George. 186 00:08:44,050 --> 00:08:46,030 You need to talk to her parents. 187 00:08:46,040 --> 00:08:47,439 Me? Why me? 188 00:08:47,440 --> 00:08:50,549 Because you're more intimidating than me. 189 00:08:50,550 --> 00:08:52,440 That's rich. 190 00:09:02,670 --> 00:09:03,969 Hey, Billy. 191 00:09:03,970 --> 00:09:05,930 Hello, Missy's dad. 192 00:09:05,940 --> 00:09:09,069 - Is your father home? - Yes. 193 00:09:09,070 --> 00:09:11,639 Could you get him for me? 194 00:09:11,640 --> 00:09:13,250 Happy to. 195 00:09:13,260 --> 00:09:15,509 Dad, it's Missy's dad! 196 00:09:15,510 --> 00:09:17,960 He's also Sheldon's dad! 197 00:09:17,970 --> 00:09:19,479 HERSCHEL: Well, howdy, neighbor. 198 00:09:19,480 --> 00:09:20,529 Hey, Herschel. 199 00:09:20,530 --> 00:09:22,219 What brings you by? Chickens too loud? 200 00:09:22,220 --> 00:09:24,569 - Nah, they been fine. - Good, good. 201 00:09:24,570 --> 00:09:26,450 Fried up the noisy one last week. 202 00:09:26,460 --> 00:09:28,609 That shut him up. Anyway, how can I help? 203 00:09:28,610 --> 00:09:30,229 Uh, well... 204 00:09:30,230 --> 00:09:33,190 It's come to my attention that, uh... 205 00:09:33,200 --> 00:09:36,099 Sheldon's run into a bit of trouble with your daughter. 206 00:09:36,100 --> 00:09:37,629 What kind of trouble? 207 00:09:37,630 --> 00:09:40,599 He says she been beating on him. 208 00:09:40,600 --> 00:09:43,769 - My Bobbi? - Yeah. 209 00:09:43,770 --> 00:09:45,540 This one? The six-year-old? 210 00:09:46,980 --> 00:09:48,279 Bobbi, get over here! 211 00:09:48,280 --> 00:09:51,649 You realize I've taken dumps bigger than this kid. 212 00:09:51,650 --> 00:09:54,079 - Hi, Daddy. - Hey, babydoll, uh, 213 00:09:54,080 --> 00:09:57,710 Mr. Cooper says that you've been picking on Sheldon. 214 00:09:57,720 --> 00:10:00,789 - Now, is that true? - No, Daddy. 215 00:10:00,790 --> 00:10:02,320 Are you sure? 216 00:10:02,330 --> 00:10:05,229 Okay, go wash up for dinner. 217 00:10:05,230 --> 00:10:07,990 I don't know what to tell you, George. 218 00:10:08,000 --> 00:10:09,429 I mean, is it, is it possible 219 00:10:09,430 --> 00:10:11,250 your son has a little crush on her? 220 00:10:11,260 --> 00:10:13,259 Oh, I don't think he's wired that way. 221 00:10:13,260 --> 00:10:15,649 Oh, are you saying that he's a... 222 00:10:15,650 --> 00:10:18,670 No, no, I'm saying he's a bookworm. [CHUCKLES] 223 00:10:18,680 --> 00:10:21,909 Unless she's math or a dictionary, he ain't interested. 224 00:10:21,910 --> 00:10:23,509 - Mm. - Yeah. 225 00:10:23,510 --> 00:10:26,079 Thanks for hearin' me out. 226 00:10:26,080 --> 00:10:28,490 Your wife sent you over here, didn't she? 227 00:10:28,500 --> 00:10:30,319 - I don't want to talk about it. - [CHUCKLES] 228 00:10:30,320 --> 00:10:31,519 I bet she did! 229 00:10:31,520 --> 00:10:32,819 Not talkin' about it! 230 00:10:32,820 --> 00:10:34,319 Tell her I said hi! 231 00:10:34,320 --> 00:10:36,160 [CHUCKLES] 232 00:10:38,470 --> 00:10:39,829 How'd it go? 233 00:10:39,830 --> 00:10:42,199 Uh, good. Yeah. 234 00:10:42,200 --> 00:10:43,669 I handled it. 235 00:10:43,670 --> 00:10:45,139 Oh, thank the Lord. 236 00:10:45,140 --> 00:10:46,969 Yeah. Me and the Lord. 237 00:10:46,970 --> 00:10:48,450 Team effort. 238 00:10:52,180 --> 00:10:54,380 [WHIRRING] 239 00:11:04,290 --> 00:11:06,419 Hello, Bobbi. 240 00:11:06,420 --> 00:11:08,989 You told on me. 241 00:11:08,990 --> 00:11:11,029 Well, actually, my brother 242 00:11:11,030 --> 00:11:14,459 figured it out, so, technically, I would argue that I didn't. 243 00:11:14,460 --> 00:11:16,560 Doesn't matter. 244 00:11:16,570 --> 00:11:19,130 Uh, I should let you know, 245 00:11:19,140 --> 00:11:20,839 I've read a book on jiu-jitsu. 246 00:11:20,840 --> 00:11:24,070 And I'm prepared to throw it at you. 247 00:11:26,780 --> 00:11:29,209 [SCREAMING] 248 00:11:29,210 --> 00:11:31,010 Shelly, it's just Bactine. 249 00:11:31,850 --> 00:11:33,010 Aah! 250 00:11:33,020 --> 00:11:35,570 I didn't even put it on you yet. 251 00:11:35,580 --> 00:11:37,349 [SHUSHING SOFTLY] 252 00:11:37,350 --> 00:11:39,689 You want to tell me what happened? 253 00:11:39,690 --> 00:11:42,489 Bobbi Sparks came into the garage... 254 00:11:42,490 --> 00:11:44,060 And she attacked you? 255 00:11:44,070 --> 00:11:46,959 Not exactly. I tried to use jiu-jitsu on her, 256 00:11:46,960 --> 00:11:48,499 but I tripped and fell. 257 00:11:48,500 --> 00:11:52,420 Aw, baby. I'm so sorry you're havin' to deal with this. 258 00:11:52,430 --> 00:11:53,619 It's okay. 259 00:11:53,620 --> 00:11:56,159 German philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche said, 260 00:11:56,160 --> 00:11:59,139 "That which does not kill us makes us stronger." 261 00:11:59,140 --> 00:12:01,260 And do you feel stronger? 262 00:12:02,280 --> 00:12:04,010 No. 263 00:12:05,220 --> 00:12:06,649 How are the knees? 264 00:12:06,650 --> 00:12:08,219 Better, thank you. 265 00:12:08,220 --> 00:12:09,949 Good. 266 00:12:09,950 --> 00:12:12,709 And regarding this jiu-jitsu stuff, you should know 267 00:12:12,710 --> 00:12:15,240 that a man's not supposed to raise his hand to a woman. 268 00:12:15,250 --> 00:12:17,880 Oh, I won't. I don't want to hurt myself again. 269 00:12:21,330 --> 00:12:24,790 Did you ever have a bully when you were growing up? 270 00:12:24,800 --> 00:12:26,690 Have you met your grandma? 271 00:12:28,770 --> 00:12:31,269 I thought you said you handled it next door. 272 00:12:31,270 --> 00:12:33,040 I did say that. 273 00:12:35,360 --> 00:12:36,479 Where you goin'? 274 00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:38,240 To handle it. 275 00:12:38,250 --> 00:12:40,549 [QUIETLY]: Should've been you in the first place. 276 00:12:40,550 --> 00:12:41,780 What? 277 00:12:41,790 --> 00:12:42,949 Good luck! 278 00:12:42,950 --> 00:12:45,489 [DOOR SHUTS] 279 00:12:45,490 --> 00:12:48,760 Way to go, Scooby! That's my newshound! 280 00:12:49,740 --> 00:12:52,470 Missy, I could really use your help. 281 00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:53,559 With what? 282 00:12:53,560 --> 00:12:56,029 I'm being bullied by Bobbi Sparks. 283 00:12:56,030 --> 00:12:57,699 Hilarious. Go on. 284 00:12:57,700 --> 00:12:58,930 Madame Doo! 285 00:12:58,940 --> 00:13:00,469 That's me! 286 00:13:00,470 --> 00:13:04,239 Mom says a man should never raise his hand to a woman. 287 00:13:04,240 --> 00:13:06,760 But I believe I've found a loophole. 288 00:13:06,770 --> 00:13:08,809 You're a woman, so you're allowed to hit her 289 00:13:08,810 --> 00:13:10,079 as much as you want. 290 00:13:10,080 --> 00:13:11,549 Why would I do that? 291 00:13:11,550 --> 00:13:13,010 Because I'm willing to pay you. 292 00:13:13,020 --> 00:13:14,079 How much? 293 00:13:14,080 --> 00:13:16,239 My life savings, four dollars. 294 00:13:16,240 --> 00:13:17,959 That's a good start. 295 00:13:17,960 --> 00:13:20,450 Now, let's talk TV privileges. 296 00:13:20,460 --> 00:13:21,719 What do you want? 297 00:13:21,720 --> 00:13:24,359 Complete control every afternoon for two months. 298 00:13:24,360 --> 00:13:26,559 That's when Professor Proton is on. 299 00:13:26,560 --> 00:13:28,770 I know. Sucks for you. 300 00:13:30,100 --> 00:13:31,530 [SIGHS] 301 00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:37,939 I'm on fire! 302 00:13:37,940 --> 00:13:39,770 [LAUGHS] 303 00:13:39,780 --> 00:13:41,139 Hello, Brenda. 304 00:13:41,140 --> 00:13:42,809 Oh, hey, Mary. 305 00:13:42,810 --> 00:13:43,840 How many lanes you need? 306 00:13:43,850 --> 00:13:46,210 Actually, I'm here to talk to you. 307 00:13:46,220 --> 00:13:48,889 Seems that our kids are havin' a little problem. 308 00:13:48,890 --> 00:13:50,789 Yeah. Herschel told me. 309 00:13:50,790 --> 00:13:52,750 Oh, good, good. 310 00:13:52,760 --> 00:13:55,260 So, I was wondering what you're plannin' to do about it, 311 00:13:55,270 --> 00:13:57,830 'cause the situation doesn't seem to be gettin' any better. 312 00:13:57,840 --> 00:13:59,509 Well, if you haven't noticed, 313 00:13:59,510 --> 00:14:01,229 I'm at work right now. 314 00:14:01,230 --> 00:14:03,160 I see that. 315 00:14:03,170 --> 00:14:04,499 But you understand 316 00:14:04,500 --> 00:14:06,799 that your daughter's being abusive to my son. 317 00:14:06,800 --> 00:14:10,169 Well, maybe your son needs to grow a pair. 318 00:14:10,170 --> 00:14:12,109 And in due time, he will. 319 00:14:12,110 --> 00:14:13,770 But right now, I expect you 320 00:14:13,780 --> 00:14:15,940 to teach your children how to behave. 321 00:14:17,680 --> 00:14:20,079 Connie Tucker to the front desk, please. 322 00:14:20,080 --> 00:14:21,819 Connie Tucker. 323 00:14:21,820 --> 00:14:23,349 Why are you calling her? 324 00:14:23,350 --> 00:14:25,580 You say my daughter's harassing your son. 325 00:14:25,590 --> 00:14:28,159 Well, her daughter's harassing me. 326 00:14:28,160 --> 00:14:30,089 Hey, Mary. 327 00:14:30,090 --> 00:14:32,259 - What are you doin' here? - Well, 328 00:14:32,260 --> 00:14:34,940 I was hopin' to have a rational conversation about Shelly, 329 00:14:34,980 --> 00:14:37,260 but there's only one person being rational. 330 00:14:37,270 --> 00:14:38,969 [GRUNTS] Uh, and it ain't you. 331 00:14:38,970 --> 00:14:41,070 Could you excuse us for just a minute? 332 00:14:44,540 --> 00:14:46,339 Do you understand that you are in the place 333 00:14:46,340 --> 00:14:48,539 where I socialize three to four days a week? 334 00:14:48,540 --> 00:14:50,949 So you care more about bowling than your grandson? 335 00:14:50,950 --> 00:14:52,279 Of course not. I'm just saying 336 00:14:52,280 --> 00:14:54,049 maybe there's a better way to go about it. 337 00:14:54,050 --> 00:14:56,449 Now, I'm warnin' you, Brenda is one mean... 338 00:14:56,450 --> 00:14:58,189 I know you don't like bad language, 339 00:14:58,190 --> 00:15:00,859 but we are in a bowling alley... One mean bitch. 340 00:15:00,860 --> 00:15:03,369 Well, I can be mean, too. 341 00:15:03,370 --> 00:15:06,059 Okay, you listen to me. You get your kid 342 00:15:06,060 --> 00:15:07,190 in line or I... 343 00:15:07,200 --> 00:15:09,399 What are you doing? 344 00:15:09,400 --> 00:15:10,280 Get out of here. 345 00:15:10,330 --> 00:15:11,970 This is my place of business. 346 00:15:13,240 --> 00:15:15,569 And now I see where your daughter gets it. 347 00:15:15,570 --> 00:15:16,590 BRENDA: You know what? 348 00:15:16,690 --> 00:15:18,489 I have been nothin' but nice 349 00:15:18,490 --> 00:15:20,709 to you and your family since the day y'all moved in, 350 00:15:20,710 --> 00:15:22,029 and I'm over it. 351 00:15:22,030 --> 00:15:23,540 Watching you walk around all holier 352 00:15:23,550 --> 00:15:24,919 than thou, like you're better 353 00:15:24,920 --> 00:15:26,059 than everyone else. 354 00:15:26,060 --> 00:15:27,149 Well, guess what, 355 00:15:27,150 --> 00:15:28,510 you're not. 356 00:15:30,350 --> 00:15:32,890 I'm gonna pray for you. 357 00:15:36,120 --> 00:15:39,390 She says that to me all the time. 358 00:15:39,400 --> 00:15:41,650 I'm not even sure she does it. 359 00:15:50,640 --> 00:15:51,909 How'd it go? 360 00:15:51,910 --> 00:15:53,999 I don't want to talk about it. 361 00:15:54,000 --> 00:15:56,069 [SNIFFS] Is that pine? 362 00:15:56,070 --> 00:15:57,709 We're not talkin' about it. 363 00:15:57,710 --> 00:15:59,870 - [DOORBELL RINGS] - And you get that! 364 00:16:05,410 --> 00:16:06,579 Herschel. 365 00:16:06,580 --> 00:16:07,610 Hey, George. 366 00:16:07,620 --> 00:16:09,209 It has come to my attention 367 00:16:09,210 --> 00:16:11,889 that your wife went to speak with my wife 368 00:16:11,890 --> 00:16:13,519 at her place of work, 369 00:16:13,520 --> 00:16:15,420 - and, uh... - She send you over here? 370 00:16:15,430 --> 00:16:18,629 Uh, the-the important thing is that I'm here to tell you 371 00:16:18,630 --> 00:16:21,429 that, uh, Mary's behavior was inappropriate. 372 00:16:21,430 --> 00:16:23,160 You know, it's interesting. 373 00:16:23,170 --> 00:16:25,099 When I came to your house, you were laughin', 374 00:16:25,100 --> 00:16:26,169 and... 375 00:16:26,170 --> 00:16:27,739 now you're all serious. 376 00:16:27,740 --> 00:16:29,200 Why is that? 377 00:16:29,210 --> 00:16:31,169 What do you say we go talk about this 378 00:16:31,170 --> 00:16:32,970 somewhere a little more comfortable? 379 00:16:32,980 --> 00:16:34,740 MARY [SHARPLY]: Who's at the door? 380 00:16:40,080 --> 00:16:42,280 [CHICKENS CLUCKING] 381 00:16:43,950 --> 00:16:46,450 Make yourself at home. 382 00:16:46,460 --> 00:16:47,559 Oh, boy. 383 00:16:47,560 --> 00:16:48,889 You hang out in here? 384 00:16:48,890 --> 00:16:49,989 Sure. 385 00:16:49,990 --> 00:16:51,259 Once you get used to the smell, 386 00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:53,099 it's not so bad. [CHUCKLES] 387 00:16:53,100 --> 00:16:54,679 I coach a high school football team. 388 00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:55,919 This smells like petunias. 389 00:16:55,920 --> 00:16:57,469 [LAUGHS] I like to... 390 00:16:57,470 --> 00:16:59,910 take a break from the family and... 391 00:16:59,920 --> 00:17:02,739 come out here and watch the games. 392 00:17:02,740 --> 00:17:04,439 - Ooh! - [CHUCKLES] 393 00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:05,759 [MUSIC PLAYING] 394 00:17:05,760 --> 00:17:07,639 Your wife don't mind? 395 00:17:07,640 --> 00:17:08,779 She don't know. 396 00:17:08,780 --> 00:17:10,279 She's scared to death of chickens. 397 00:17:10,280 --> 00:17:12,110 - Is that right? - Once I found out, 398 00:17:12,120 --> 00:17:14,619 buildin' this coop was a no-brainer. 399 00:17:14,620 --> 00:17:16,549 [LAUGHING] 400 00:17:16,550 --> 00:17:18,880 ♪ I sure did love... ♪ 401 00:17:23,160 --> 00:17:24,829 You were gone so long. 402 00:17:24,830 --> 00:17:26,190 How did it go? 403 00:17:26,200 --> 00:17:27,909 Well... 404 00:17:27,910 --> 00:17:29,799 [ENGLISH ACCENT]: One lump or two? 405 00:17:29,800 --> 00:17:32,199 Two, please. 406 00:17:32,200 --> 00:17:33,869 Billy? 407 00:17:33,870 --> 00:17:36,539 Why would I want lumpy tea? 408 00:17:36,540 --> 00:17:37,969 Isn't he pretty? 409 00:17:37,970 --> 00:17:39,139 Very pretty. 410 00:17:39,140 --> 00:17:41,409 I feel pretty. 411 00:17:41,410 --> 00:17:45,749 ♪ Girl, you know it's true ♪ 412 00:17:45,750 --> 00:17:47,819 ♪ My love... ♪ 413 00:17:47,820 --> 00:17:49,680 I handled it. 414 00:17:49,690 --> 00:17:51,750 Thank you so much. 415 00:17:51,760 --> 00:17:53,470 We're family. It's what we do. 416 00:17:55,190 --> 00:17:58,290 [HERSCHEL AND GEORGE SR. CHUCKLING] 417 00:17:58,300 --> 00:18:00,959 Listen, I'm sorry my wife went down to the bowling alley. 418 00:18:00,960 --> 00:18:03,979 Please, I'm sorry Brenda made me come to your door. 419 00:18:03,980 --> 00:18:05,109 I'm not. 420 00:18:05,110 --> 00:18:07,499 This is the most fun I've had all week. 421 00:18:07,500 --> 00:18:10,700 I-I feel bad about the whole thing with the kids. 422 00:18:10,710 --> 00:18:12,609 Hey, it happens. 423 00:18:12,610 --> 00:18:15,340 I know, but Bobbi shouldn't be beatin' on Sheldon like that. 424 00:18:15,350 --> 00:18:17,080 - It's not okay. - What's not okay 425 00:18:17,090 --> 00:18:19,379 is Sheldon gettin' beat up by a little girl. 426 00:18:19,380 --> 00:18:20,849 Well... 427 00:18:20,850 --> 00:18:22,149 Yeah. 428 00:18:22,150 --> 00:18:23,989 [BOTH CHUCKLING] 429 00:18:23,990 --> 00:18:25,979 Look, I'll talk to Bobbi. 430 00:18:25,980 --> 00:18:28,080 I don't know if it'll help, but I'll try. 431 00:18:28,090 --> 00:18:30,389 - Hey, you're a good man. - Mm. 432 00:18:30,390 --> 00:18:33,020 Yeah, I-I should be headin' back. 433 00:18:33,080 --> 00:18:34,190 Mm. 434 00:18:34,200 --> 00:18:36,860 All right, well, look, come on by anytime. 435 00:18:36,870 --> 00:18:38,430 Yeah. 436 00:18:38,440 --> 00:18:41,139 You know, we should obably get our stories straight 437 00:18:41,140 --> 00:18:43,169 before we talk to our respective... 438 00:18:43,170 --> 00:18:44,870 - mates. - Sure. 439 00:18:44,880 --> 00:18:46,709 What do you want to say? 440 00:18:46,710 --> 00:18:48,379 How 'bout this? 441 00:18:48,380 --> 00:18:50,379 We had words, 442 00:18:50,380 --> 00:18:52,110 it almost got ugly, 443 00:18:52,120 --> 00:18:53,579 but we came to an understanding. 444 00:18:53,580 --> 00:18:54,690 - I like that. - Yeah. 445 00:18:54,700 --> 00:18:55,999 You want to take a swing at me? 446 00:18:56,000 --> 00:18:57,069 Make it look real? 447 00:18:57,070 --> 00:19:00,550 I have a freakishly high tolerance for pain. 448 00:19:00,560 --> 00:19:02,849 No, no. But you're sweet for offering. 449 00:19:02,850 --> 00:19:05,519 - You have a good night. - You, too, pal. [CHUCKLES] 450 00:19:05,520 --> 00:19:06,829 BRENDA: Herschel! 451 00:19:06,830 --> 00:19:08,680 Where the hell are you?! 452 00:19:08,690 --> 00:19:09,999 Shh. 453 00:19:10,000 --> 00:19:12,569 [QUIETLY]: I built a hidey-hole under here, 454 00:19:12,570 --> 00:19:15,839 but there's only room for one of us. 455 00:19:15,840 --> 00:19:18,209 Where is that fat dumbass? 456 00:19:18,210 --> 00:19:22,009 Believe it or not, that means I'm gettin' lucky tonight. 457 00:19:22,010 --> 00:19:24,549 Y'all have an odd relationship. 458 00:19:24,550 --> 00:19:27,279 Love is a mysterious thing. 459 00:19:27,280 --> 00:19:29,050 BRENDA: Herschel! 460 00:19:33,990 --> 00:19:36,889 ADULT SHELDON: Existing in a world of predators isn't easy, 461 00:19:36,890 --> 00:19:40,260 but we prey have developed several natural defenses 462 00:19:40,270 --> 00:19:41,530 to help us survive. 463 00:19:41,540 --> 00:19:43,060 There's playing dead, 464 00:19:43,070 --> 00:19:45,519 - warning calls, camouflage... - [BICYCLE BELL RINGS] 465 00:19:45,520 --> 00:19:47,300 ♪ ♪ 466 00:19:47,310 --> 00:19:50,209 and, last but certainly not least, 467 00:19:50,210 --> 00:19:52,009 good old-fashioned running away. 468 00:19:52,010 --> 00:19:53,340 [SCREAMING] 469 00:19:58,920 --> 00:20:01,170 A little screaming never hurts either. 470 00:20:02,300 --> 00:20:05,370 - Synced and corrected by VitoSilans - -- www.MY-SUBS.com -- 32194

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