All language subtitles for Bonanza - S08E16 - Ponderosa Explosion.eng

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What do you think, Hoss?

I don't know, Joe, it's...

Hoss, I'm telling you the truth.

If me and Clyde had a
place to do this here right,

why, we'd be plumb
fools to sell you this here.

Now, don't go galloping too
fast, too soon, Mr. Barlow.

Me and Joe just ain't made
up our minds yet, that's all.

L-Like I just said,
you Cartwrights'd have

the market cornered,
getting top dollar

for hardly any work at all.

Well, you fellas

sure make it sound easy enough.

I just don't know if
Hoss and I are ready

for an operation
like this, though.

Well, Little Joe, I told
you I was gonna give you

the instructions and all
the paraphernalia needed.

Well? What do y'all say?

What do you think, Joe?

Excuse us a minute.

Sure. Y'all go right
ahead and think it over.

I... I just don't see how
we can go wrong with it.

Well, I don't find
nothing wrong with it,

except maybe a few
growls from Pa, but...

Oh, no, I don't think so.
Not when he finds out

the kind of profit
we're gonna be making.

Yeah, but, Joe,
that's a lot of money.

It's a lot of money, but you
got to think big nowadays.

Yeah. But $50 for two?

We're in it for two. But
we're not talking about

any run-of-the-mill
thing, we're talking about

two genuine Gerby Royals.

They're not a dime a dozen.

You're right.

Looks like you and
me made a sale, Clyde.

I think we could have got
more money out of 'em.

You know, I
believe you're right.

Well, I'm willing to
take a fling if you are.

All right, let's go.

All right, gentlemen.

Ten, 20, 30, 40, 50.

- Thank you.
- $50.

You boys really made
an excellent deal.

I mean, y'all really
made an excellent deal.

Yup.

Uh, uh, don't forget
about the instructions

you're supposed to give us.

Oh, yeah, I durn
near forgot 'em.

Uh, of course, Barlow
was talking for himself

when he implied that
the instructions came free.

Implied nothing.

- He said for sure they went with the deal.
- All right,

- forget the deal. Give me the $50 back.
- Doggone right,

- give us our money back.
- Come on. -Hold it.

Hold it, boys.

Clyde, I did mention
the instructions

in the deal, now. Go
on and give it to 'em.

- But-But...
- Give it to 'em.

Like I said, a deal's a deal.

Thank you.

Joe, we'd better head for
the Ponderosa. Come on.

Uh, boys, just a minute.

You know, I plumb near forgot
about them carrying cages.

Uh, you know, I didn't
mention 'em in the deal, but, uh,

you boys can, uh,
can buy 'em from us

or rent 'em from us
at a reasonable price.

You know, it... Uh, well,
like I said, you know,

being as we know you boys, uh,

and want to kindly help
y'all get started in business,

I-I expect we can
lend 'em to you.

I expect.

Come on, Joe, let's go.

Giddyap.

Barlow, tell me something.

Where did you dig up a
name like Gerby Royals?

Well, them boys give me
$50 for a pair of rabbits,

I figure I ought to
give 'em a fancy name.

That's right.

Well, all we have to do
now is just sit back and wait.

That's right,
Clyde. Like I said,

you stick with old Barlow,

and we'll be wearing
nothing but pure diamonds.

- Yeah.
- Whoa, whoa.

Gee, I can't wait...
I can't wait till Pa

- gets a look at these.
- Joe, dad-burnit,

can't you do nothing
slow and easy-like?

- What's the matter?
- I mean,

I don't think we ought
to tell Pa right off.

I think we ought to kind
of sneak up on him, like.

Wait till after he's had dinner

and got a full
stomach, you know.

Yeah, I think
maybe you're right.

Hey, you know, you
read Pa pretty good, Hoss.

Yeah, well, it ain't easy.

- Took a long, long time to study Pa.
- Hey.

- Hi, Pa.
- Hoss.

- Hi.
- Hiya. You ha-have a good dinner?

Not yet, but looks like
I'm gonna have one.

Uh, no, Pa, the-these
rabbits ain't eating rabbits.

Uh, me and Joe are
on the ground floor

of a really big
money-making enterprise, Pa.

- Are you? -Yes.
- Yeah, we're, uh,

we're in the... we're in
the rabbit-raising business.

Oh, well, then I
know I'm gonna have

plenty of rabbit stew around.

No, Pa, like I say,
these ain't eating rabbits.

We-We ran into your friend,
you know, Clyde and Barlow.

Two real nice fellows, and...

and, well, they-they sold us
on the idea of raising rabbits

for fur coats... at
two dollars a skin.

Clyde and Barlow got
you, uh, started on this.

I know we just got two
little old measly rabbits now,

but, you see,
when Nellie here...

No, no. No.

That's Buck. I-I
got Nellie over here.

Oh, yeah? Well, anyhow,

we put Nellie and...
Well, we get Nellie...

We put Nellie
and-and Buck together,

and then in four months
Nellie's gonna have...

How many rabbits?

Well-Well, uh,

Nellie's good
for probably, uh...

oh, ten rabbits.

Then you divide. Of course,
they're not all the same.

Then you have five
times the divisional,

- uh, adjustment you've made...
- Uh, Joe-Joe-Joseph...

- with an overhead...
- Joe, Joe... Joseph.

But... yeah?

You don't have to tell
me how rabbits multiply.

- At two dollars a head, too, Pa.
- Two dollars a head.

Hmm.

Are they, uh... they
top-grade rabbits?

Are they top-grade?

Pa, do you know
anything about rabbits?

Anything at all?

Hmm, uh, well, I know
jacks and cottontails.

Yeah.

Well, let me instruct you

in the quality of rabbits.

These rabbits... Well,
feel him. Just feel it.

Feel his fur. Go ahead.

- Ain't that something?
- Mm.

These rabbits, Pa...

are genuine Gerby Royals.

There ain't a half a dozen of
'em in the country, right, Joe?

Right. Pa, we are
gonna put a fur skin...

a fur coat... a whole coat...

On the back of every
woman in America.

Every woman in America.

You're gonna be the
rabbit kings of America.

Mm.

Well...

I wish you a lot of luck
in your rabbit enterprise.

- Thanks, Pa.
- Right.

- Yeah.
- See you at dinner.

Yeah.

I don't know, Hoss.
We've been sitting here

every night for a week now.

Well, according
to the instructions,

she's sure enough due.

Hey, you know, m-maybe we're...

we're making her nervous
by just watching her.

You think?

Well, I don't know. You
know what they say...

You-you can't make
water boil by watching it.

They say that.

I think I'm gonna go to bed.

- You coming?
- No.

I think I'll stay here and keep
Nellie company a little longer.

Hmm. Good night.

Good night, Joe.

Good night, Nellie.

Come on, Nellie, be motherly.

Hey, Joe, wake up. Wake
up. They're here, Joe.

Joe, wake up. Wake up.
They've arrived. They're here.

Oh. Well, say hello to
them, I want to sleep.

J... Joe, our...
Joe. Joe. Come on.

Our investment
has now multiplied.

Wake up. Multiplied.

How ma... How-How many?

Well, I didn't get a
good count, but come on.

Oh.

I hope she gave us a good count.

Look at them
little critters, Joe.

Look at those
little Gerby Royals.

- Nellie, you're all right.
- Mm-hmm.

Now, let me see. We
got one, two, three,

four, five, six, seven, eight.

Eight little Gerby
Royals. Beautiful.

Now, let me see.
Supposing... Supposing...

Supposing what?

Well, now-now, suppose we got...

we got eight... we got
eight Gerby Royals.

- Yeah.
- Now supposing we got

four males and four females.

Four males and four females.

The way I figure it,

before very long, we
should have ourselves

50... 50... Gerby Royals...

- 50 Gerby Royals.
- At two dollars apiece.

Oh, boy. Hey, Joe,
you know, that's...

that's like an
explosion, ain't it?

- Mm-hmm.
- I mean, like a...

It's like a rabbit explosion.

- Hey, wait a minute.
- Yeah. Yeah.

- Hey, wait a minute, Joe.
- Yeah?

What happens if
them four he-rabbits

turns out to be she-rabbits?

Or the four she-rabbits
turns out to be he-rabbits?

And are she- or he-rabbits.

All of 'em are he-rabbits or
all of 'em are she-rabbits...

What happens then?

You figure it out.
I'm going to bed.

For a young, roping horse, he
works real good, don't he, Ben?

Not bad, Nate, not bad.

Moves like a big cat.

Yeah, seems sound. Moves good.

Well?

Well, fact is, Nate,

I've never been much at
buying young or untried

cutting and roping horses.

$150's mighty low
for an animal like this.

$150?

Well, I'll have to
think about it, Nate.

I can't promise he won't be sold

while you're making
up your mind.

I'll take that chance.

I hear that Hoss and Little
Joe are doing real proud

with their rabbit raising
over at the Ponderosa.

Yeah. Real, real proud.

They got more
Gerby Royal rabbits

hippity-hoppiting
all over that place.

Gerby-what rabbits?

Gerby Royals.

Never heard of that breed.

Yeah. They're real productive.

Mr. Ben.

Mr. Ben. Mr. Ben.

Jumping friends not welcome.

Should belong in barn.

Mr. Ben.

Mr. Ben! Oh. Little Joe.

- Shh... I'm here, Hop Sing.
- Little Joe.

I'm trying to get some of
the rabbits that got away.

Will you stop making so...
Wh-Where'd you get those?

In kitchen, where not belong.

Oh, I'm-I'm sorry. We-We'll
take better care of them next time.

Poor management.
Soon you lose business.

All right, the
management'll get better.

We're gonna get more
cages. It's gonna be all right.

You speak English!

Eh!

Come on, let's get
back in the barn.

- Yeah, I got four more of 'em.
- Good.

- Is this all that got out?
- No. There's more of 'em.

- Let's get these in a cage...
- Yeah.

And get the other ones before
Pa starts complaining again.

Yeah.

How many would
you say are still out?

Well, let me see.

Well, we got four, six...

That makes eight left.

Yeah... oh.

- Oh, good, good.
- Forgot about that little fella.

That's seven. Seven.
And counting the ones

under the house...
15 all together.

Joe, they're popping
out all over the place.

Yeah, I know it, and
we're fresh out of cages.

And them cages
are costing money.

Hey.

Hey, you remember those,
those old wire chicken cages

th-they had in the back
of Nate Swenson's stable?

Oh, yeah. Hey, if he's
still got those, buddy,

we could save us a
bunch of money there.

- Come on, let's go.
- Okay.

♪♪

I'm sorry, boys,
but like I said,

Old Man Brice bought them
cages about... about a month ago.

Well, I reckon there
ain't nothing to do

but me and Joe to build
some more, that's all.

By the way, I, uh... I ran into
Barlow and Clyde this morning.

They showed me
that contract they got

- with that outfit in Chicago.
- Yeah.

True they'll take all the
rabbit hides they can get?

That's right. Me
and Little Joe figure

to put a genuine Gerby Royal
on every female in the United...

- Hey, Nate?
- Yes, Little Joe?

Is this the horse
Pa's been looking at?

Sure is. Ben liked him,

but thought I was a mite
high on the price. Why?

Well, I was just thinking,
Pa's birthday is coming up.

That'd make a fine present.

You're right, Joe, it
sure would at that.

$150, he's yours.

Whew!

$150. We got most
of our money tied up

- in that rabbit business.
- Yeah.

We'll have to settle
for something less.

Pa would sure look fine
on him, though, wouldn't he?

Yeah.

- Come on.
- Now, wait a minute, boys, wait a minute.

This, uh...

this rabbit-raising
kind of interests me.

Now, if this rabbit thing
gets a little too big for you,

maybe you'd like
a silent partner?

You want to buy in?

In a way.

What with having my
stable here in Virginia City,

you could use part of it as
a storehouse for your hides,

and I could... make them
cages in my spare time... for a...

third interest, of course.

It'd take a lot more than that
to get a third interest, Nate.

- Come on, Joe.
- Well, I, uh...

I might add a fine
birthday present

for you boys to give your pa.

- Hmm?
- Sure.

You just got yourself in
the rabbit business, Nate.

Congratulations, partner.

Hey, he's gonna be surprised.

Now, come on,
don't be so skittish.

I'll tell you,
for a little fella

that was practically hand-fed
by Hoss and Little Joe,

you sure don't cooperate much.

Well...

Mighty fine looking animal.

Yeah. Happy birthday, Pa.

Me and Little Joe know
you've had your eye

on old Nate's cutting horse
for a long time, so we...

we bought him for
your birthday present.

♪♪

Son of a gun.

It's just like...

having all my birthdays
and Christmases in...

one beautiful package.

Uh, N-Nate says he's
still a little skittish yet.

Oh... but he's, he's solid
and he's got the good moves.

Little work, he'll, he'll
be a real good one.

I don't know what
to say. I... Thank you.

Thank you very much.

Pa, I'll go put
him in the corral.

Yeah.

You know, he's
a fine looking one.

Glad you like him, Pa.

Hope old Hop Sing's got
something good to eat in there.

My stomach tells me
it's time to... bean down.

It is. Hey, well, you take this
little fella and put him away,

and I'll talk to Hop Sing,
get everything ready.

Right.

Thank you, Hoss.

Yes, sir.

Mmm! Look at that.

- Mmm, that smells good.
- Mmm-mmm!

If it's anything like
as good as it smells,

boy, oh, boy, oh, boy.

Hey, you know, we haven't had
stewed chicken in a long time.

Hop Sing, you sure
outdid yourself tonight.

Don't taste exactly
like chicken, does it?

Uh... More like...
sort of like...

Sort of like rabbit, yes?

Yeah, like rabbit.

Hop Sing, how m...

how many rabbits did
you put in that stew?

Three.

Fat one, Little Joe.

Three fat one, Little Joe.

Do you know what that is?
That's six dollars, Hop Sing!

Six dollars’ worth of Gerbies!

Mr. Ben figure you say that.

He tell me, tell you,
give him the bill.

Mm-hmm.

Give him the bill. It's
not the, it's not the...

it's not the three
rabbits that are in there,

it's what it represents. By
the time we finish dinner,

those three rabbits could
be maybe 24 rabbits.

24... Look at all those Gerbies.

I got enough money in
there... I'm gonna eat them.

Excuse me.

I'm gonna...

go out and get
me a little fresh air.

♪♪

- Little Joe.
- Yeah?

Look... look at
this cute little feller.

Hey.

Pretty interesting
markings, you know?

Yeah, he's a friendly
little cuss, too, ain't he?

Mm-hmm.

Mm. Mm, good pelt.

- Excellent, excellent.
- Joe...

do you have to do that?

How many more
like that one we got?

Well, if you're thinking
in terms of a fur coat,

you can forget it...
He's the only one we got

with markings like this.

Oh, dad-burnit.

Hey, you know, we could get
two or three times as much money

if we had some
more like that one.

Well, you just forget it!

Well, don't get
all out of sorts!

I'm just trying to
be enterprising.

You know, I...
sometimes think you'd skin

everything on the Ponderosa
if the price was right.

Well, if that's your attitude,
then just leave me alone.

I have a lot of paperwork.

This business
doesn't run itself.

I got to figure out
profits against...

overhead and things like that.

Little brother...

there's changes
taking place in you.

And they ain't for
the better, neither.

Aw, business is business.

Oh, you rabbits.

428 rabbits and 428 rabbits...

you got about 956 rabbits.

♪♪

Dad-burn.

I ain't never seen
nothing double and triple

and quadruple and...

whatever comes after that
like you little jumpers have.

I ain't never seen
nothing multiply like this.

The bad part is that...

I ain't got the heart
to skin none of you.

But my little brother
catches ahold of you...

Hoss!

Hoss!

Hoss, you in...

Look at all them plump rabbits.

Just prime for skinnin'.

Whew! Lookie here.

What do you say, Hoss?

Howdy, boys.
I-I'll tell you fellas,

they're, uh... they're not
really as prime as they look.

No, they ain't.

Ooh, lookie here.

Well, I... Well, I...
I think they need

at least two or three
more weeks anyhow.

Well, that's what you been
telling us all the time, Hoss.

What's the matter?

You got a better
offer or something?

Don't you try to
outsmart us, Mr. Hoss.

Well, it ain't that,
Clyde. It's just that I...

well, I just think they...
they need a little more time.

Them Little Joe's
feelings, too, huh?

Well, uh... well, I...

I reckon I know my
little brother's feelings.

Where's Little Joe now?

Well, he ain't around, but...

like I said, I, I reckon
I know his feelings.

We come out here figuring
you'd have a batch of skins, Hoss.

I guess we took
a ride for nothing!

Them rabbits look pretty
good right now to me, Hoss.

Yeah, look, Mr. Barlow,
I'll tell you what,

you and Clyde just...
just don't fret none.

Let me take care of everything,

and, and I'll guarantee
everything'll be all right.

Well, are you gonna have a batch
of skins for us next week, huh?

- I should be able to...
- We're way behind schedule.

I know, Clyde, I know we are.

And you and Mr. Barlow
can count on me.

I guarantee you that, that,

that we'll, we'll
have it all done then.

- Well, that's what we're figuring on.
- Yes, sir.

There's more ways than one
of skinning a cat... a rabbit.

Get up in here!

Hey. Hey, Hoss.

Hey, Clyde! Hey, CI...

Cut that out! What
are you doing?

- Quiet. I was...
- Oh, I get it, I get it.

You were stalling Clyde and
Barlow, weren't you? Hmm?

But, Joe, I wouldn't
exactly call it stalling.

- What would you... what would you call it?
- Stalling.

Stalling. Now, listen, you
can't put it off any longer.

We have some
rabbit-skinning to do.

Joe, wait.

Now wait a minute,
Joe, wait a minute.

I-I've been thinking this
over, and... and, well...

And, buh-buh-buh, wha-what?

Well, dad-burnit!

Joe, you think
they're big enough?

Do I think they're big enough?
Hoss, look at this rabbit.

- Yeah, you stay away...
- Look at this rabbit.

What are you raising, a
mountain lion or a rabbit?

Now, look, are you letting your
heart rule your pocketbook? Hmm?

Well, Joe, money ain't
everything, dad-burnit.

Look, for the last two
weeks, Barlow and Clyde

have been hounding us,
hounding us for rabbit hides.

Now when we finally got a batch

that are big
enough for skinning,

you go soft as butter.

Well, reckon I have grown
sort of fond of them at that.

Have grown fond of them.

All right, look, I didn't know
when I went in partners with you

that you were gonna
go squeamish on me.

But let's not forget that
I still have a little say.

Half of these rabbits
happen to be mine.

And I am gonna skin
my half of the rabbits.

Now, if you'll
just step aside...

No, you ain't.

You ain't skinning
these rabbits, Joe.

Oh, yes, I am. Would you step...

You're standing in fr...
That fat Gerby right there

behind your head
happens to be my Gerby.

You're standing in
front of my Gerby.

No, you ain't
skinning these rabbits.

Not today you ain't, Joseph.

You're mak... you're making...
you're making me mad.

I don't care. You ain't
skinning these rabbits.

I'm skinning that Gerby.

Now, well, I don't want to
have to come through you.

I'd-I'd reconsider
that, little brother.

Well, I'm telling you right now.

I'm telling you, my
brother, I'm fast.

Now, that Ger... There's a...
That Gerby right behind there

is my rabbit. I'll cut
you to bit... ribbons.

I'm gonna have... I'm telling
you, I'm gonna... I'm gonna...

Ooh, I'm gonna...

That's my Gerby, and
I'm gonna get to him.

One way or the
other, Brother Hoss,

I'm gonna get into
one of these cages.

Well, come on! Now
let me out of here!

I'm... Oh, am I... I'm
gonna... Let me out of here!

Ooh, am I... I'm gonna
hurt... Ooh, I'm gonna hurt you.

Come on! Now let me out of here!

Not until you
pull in your horns.

Oh... I'm gonna
tear you to pieces

when I get out of
here. Ooh, oh, my foot.

- Settle down.
- You... Look, let me out of here.

Wait a minute, wait
a minute, what's, uh...

what's the trouble?

Pa, he won't let me skin
my share of the Gerbies.

Is that true, Hoss?

Well, yeah, dad-burnit, Pa,

I-I've grown sort of fond
of these little fellers, and...

well...

But the fact remains
that they are half his.

That's right.

Dad-burnit. Legally
they are half his, yeah.

Well, then let
him have his half.

And, Hoss, let him out.

Thank you, Father.

All right.

All right.

Straighten up.

Hardened little criminal.

Business is business,
and-and that's all there is to it.

Hoss... what must
be done must be done.

Right in our own family.

My very own little
brother, a fiend.

I'll tell you this,

if he skins more than
his half, I'm gonna...

Well... how many have you slain?

Speak up, you fiend.

I didn't slay any of them.

I couldn't do it. I guess I
got too fond of 'em, too.

Really?

Yeah, they were all
looking at me with big eyes,

wiggling their
ears and all that.

Doggone it, Joe,
I'm proud of you.

There for a while I didn't
think you had a heart.

Um, gentlemen,
uh, the fact remains

that, uh, the Ponderosa
now has umpteen rabbits

we can't eat

and umpteen
rabbits we can't skin.

Now, what do you...

enterprising fur dealers
intend to do with them?

I hadn't thought about that, Pa.

Well, I suggest you
start thinking about it

before those cute little
ear-wiggling friends of yours

take over the Ponderosa.

Joe, think.

I'm thinking. Are you thinking?

I'm trying.

Well, what do you figure, Joe?

Well... well, we
could turn 'em loose.

No, we can't do that.

They'd overrun the
ranch inside of six months.

Yeah.

Well, s-suppose we
sold 'em back to CI...

Clyde and Barlow
alive and let them...

Clyde and Barlow?

No. No, we couldn't.

Couldn't think about this
little fella as a fur coat.

We got to do something.

Yeah. That's for sure.

Pa ain't gonna
sit still for long.

Hey.

I got an idea.

Yeah?

Yeah. Uh,

see, your affection
f-for the rabbits

is-is bigger than-than
my affection.

Well, uh, I'm bigger
than you are, Joe.

Right, right. You're
bigger than I am

- and your affection is bigger.
- Yeah.

So I'll give you my
share of the rabbits.

- Oh...
- It's all right.

Joe, you son of a gun,
that's-that's nice of you.

- Hey.
- What?

We're in this together.

Don't you pull that stuff on me.

Hoss, it was j...
it was a thought.

Oh, I had that all figured
out just like that, yeah.

Miserable rabbit eat
up Hop Sing garden.

Me chop. Me chop.

Oh. Little Joe.

Mr. Hoss. Me... not
want rabbit get away.

Save you two dollar.

Abner, I think you ought
to get a pretty good price

for that old saddle,
don't you think?

I have to, Ben.

What do you mean you have to?

You sound as if you've
been had or something.

Well, you wound me up awful
tight when we was dickering.

Hey, speaking of tight,

I think the least you could
do is break in this new saddle.

Break it in? Why, I
hope that saddle pinches

and bites you for months.

Happy birthday, Ben.

Thank you.

Ben?

Me and Clyde just got
in from the Ponderosa.

And I'm tellin' you,
them two boys of yours

have done gone plumb loco.

They won't sell us
none of them rabbits.

We got commitments
on them animals.

What are you gonna
do about it, Ben?

Well, boys, I'd
surely like to help you,

but my hands are tied.

Now, ain't this here something?

Me and Clyde put them
two boys in business,

and now they done
backed out on us.

Well, you know how it is.

When you own Gerby Royals,
you just hate to part with them.

Well-well, it don't
make no difference.

They're-they're
still only rabbits.

You sure charge
a mighty good price

for them being only rabbits.

Now, wait a minute, Ben, me
and Clyde ain't gonna take this here

laying down. You know yourself

that a business deal
is a business deal.

A business deal
is a business deal.

And it's your business
deal and it's your problem.

So good day and good luck.

Clyde, like I said,

me and you ain't gonna
take this here laying down.

Is that all you got built?

You'll have to go faster than
that or we'll never catch up.

Hey, here comes
our silent partner.

Whoa!

Morning, Nate!

Morning, boys. -Nate.

Boy, you-you really get up
early for a city fella, you know?

Sort of. But when you
got investments, why,

you got to keep a sharp
eye open, don't you, partners?

Yeah, that-that-that's
right, Nate.

- Are you...
- Well, I, uh...

I reckon you boys won't
mind if I load up here

with a few of
these prime rabbits.

Well, I-I think you're
r... you're rushing things

- a little bit, Nate.
- What do you mean? -Yeah.

Well, I'll tell you, Nate,
th-these rabbits, they, uh...

they ain't really as
prime as they look, no.

No.

- Well, they look fine to me.
- Well, no, that-that's...

that's only because we're-we're
keeping 'em warm in the barn.

- Right in here.
- Yeah, that, uh... th-that's right, Nate.

Uh, Little Joe is right.

And I'll tell you
something else, too.

We, uh... You know, me and
Little Joe, we've been studying

these rabbits, and we, uh...

we heard something the
other day kind of interesting.

We heard that, uh...

- What'd we hear, Joe?
- What?

Oh, what we heard. We
heard... Oh, what we heard was

that, uh... that old, old
rabbits, very o-old rabbits,

th-they're the
best kind of rabbits.

Yeah, Nate, uh,
Little Joe is right.

If you... if you

sell young coats,
all-all the hair falls out.

Really give you a black
eye in the business.

I mean, really,
it'd be terrible.

That's right. Uh, uh, horrible.

Not half as
terrible and horrible

as if a certain party comes
up minus a birthday present.

What do you mean by that, Nate?

I heard a distant rumor that
you boys have been making pets

out of all these hippity-hops.

- Oh, now-now...
- Oh, that's silly.

- Now wait a minute...
- Wait a minute nothing!

Your silent partner's just about
ready to become un-silenced

and start yelping good and loud.

Now, Nate, you're
jumping to conclusions.

Well, could be, but...

I don't know, my investments
look all right to me.

Well, they, uh... they look
good, Nate, and-and all,

but-but they
need a little aging.

All right. I'll give
you one week.

Nate, you're being
sort of shortsighted.

And one week only because,
well, Ben and I have been friends

- since we were... No buts at all!
- But, Nate...

And If I find out I've
been flimflammed,

friendship ceases

and that birthday present of
Ben's comes back to the stable.

You understand?

Giddap!

We got to do something.

We-we got to float
a loan or something

and, and get out of our
partnership with that fiend.

Yeah. There's just
one thing wrong

with this whole
situation, little brother.

Yeah? What's that?

Well, our friend the
fiend there, Nate, is right.

Business is business.

Yeah, but the rabbits. We
can't... we can't sell 'em.

Hey, here comes Pa.

Well, he sure looks
smooth-gaited, Pa.

Yeah. A pleasure to sit.

You can always count on
getting a good spirited animal

from old Nate, can't you?

Hey, that saddle
looks fine on him, too.

Yeah, almost broke in.

Oh!

Hey, Pa, you-you all right?

Get your... take your
hands off me! Take 'em off!

Don't touch me!
All right, that does it.

That was the last straw,
the very last straw, you hear?

Get rid of those
long-haired... those long-long...

- long-haired, long-eared r-rodents!
- Rabbits. Rabbits.

- Oh.
- Get rid of 'em!

- Pa.
- And go get my horse

before he runs from here back
to Virginia City, do you hear me?

- Yes, sir.
- Hurry up now! On the double! Get!

Rodents.

Boys miss dinner.

Must be chasing
new horse long way.

Yeah, they'll hang
tough after that horse.

Empty belly sometimes
good lesson for soft heart.

Yeah.

They miss a meal or
two, it might even sharpen

their business senses, Hop Sing.

Good night, Mr. Cartwright.

Good night.

These rich-living rabbits
been having it too easy, Clyde.

We got to put a
lot more in a crate,

or else we're gonna
run out of crates.

Not so loud.

I still got some rock
salt in my bottom

from when I was stealing
chickens when I was a kid.

You're getting more like
an old lady all the time.

They already done gone to bed.

Now, come on, get in, let's
get these rabbits out of here.

You don't have to talk so loud.

Well, I got to get these
rabbits out of here.

You talk too much.

Howdy.

H-H-How-Howdy, Ben.

I-I know what you're
thinking, but you know us, Ben.

We ain't just common thieves.

That's right, Ben.

You caught me and Clyde,

but me and Clyde's
got a contract to fill, and,

well, we got to...
How'd you like it...

if I helped you
fill that contract?

What do you mean?

What I mean is that
these rabbits have to go.

Oh, you mean they're
getting to be pests, ain't they?

Yeah, in a manner of speaking.

My sons are doing too good
a job raising these rabbits,

so I'm taking over before...
these rabbits take over.

Meaning you'll sell.

If the price is right.

Well, me and Clyde is receptive.

Now, let me get this, uh,
straight, see if I'm right.

You're to pay two dollars
for each rabbit. That right?

That's right, cured and skinned.

Skinned and cured.

Well, since, uh, I aim to
deliver these rabbits to you

at, uh... well, sort of
half done, so to speak,

I think a dollar and
a half would be fair.

Oh, no, Ben. A
dollar and a quarter

is more with the line
in the going market.

Dollar and a half.

Barlow, I'll-I'll
shave my take a mite

just to meet his
dollar and a half.

Ben, you sure are
snug with a dollar.

But seeing as how you got
me and Clyde cornered here,

I'll give you a hundred
dollar for the whole shebang.

Hundred dollars?

Why, there's more
than 200 rabbits here.

A hundred and 30 dollars.

Hundred and 50.

A hundred and 50?!

Cash.

That sure is hard money.

But, Ben, if you'd kindly
give us a little hand here

and help us loading, it
sure would ease the pain.

Howdy, Nate.

Don't you howdy
me, Ben Cartwright.

Nate, you sound
a little out of sorts.

- What's the trouble?
- Trouble?

Those sons of yours
are trying to skin me

out of my third interest
in the rabbit raising.

That's the trouble.

Make sense, Nate.

Luckily, I ran into
Barlow and Clyde,

and they told me about the
tender-hearted Cartwright boys.

Tender-hearted Car...

What are you talking about?

I made a deal with
Hoss and Little Joe

for one third interest
in their rabbit raising,

for the use of my
stable and-and, uh,

that birthday
present they give you.

Oh.

Well, that, uh...

that, uh, sure puts a new
light on things, doesn't it?

It sure does.

Now, if that little
horse is in good health,

I'll just take him back and
charge a... a day's rental.

- Fair enough, Ben?
- Yeah.

He's in the stable, isn't he?

Uh, uh, Nate, uh...

Nate, you, uh... you told me

you'd sell me that
black for $150.

That was my price.

Yeah. Well... I
guess it's a deal, then.

You, uh...

you got time for
a cup of coffee?

Obliged, Ben, but...

I got the missus watching
the stable while I'm away.

Yeah.

And her... her hay
fever always kicks up

something awful if she
has to stay there too long.

Well, I'm sorry to have
caused you all the trouble, Nate.

Oh, reckon there
was no harm done.

- Bye, Ben.
- Bye, Nate.

Come on.

The wild geese have come home.

There's... there's not-not...
not a scratch on him.

We saved him for you, Pa.

This one... this one ain't even
got a scratch on it, Pa. It's...

Where's the rest of the saddle?

Well, you... you-you were
right about one thing yet.

- That horse is quick as a cat.
- Yeah.

Boy, you know, you
know horses, don't you?

- You sure do, Pa.
- Where is the rest of the saddle?

Hey, but, uh...

Here it is.

You know, Pa, there's, uh...

there's just a whole
bunch of low-hanging limbs

all over the Ponderosa.

No, and the bru...
and the brush.

- You remember the brush?
- Oh...

You couldn't...
you couldn't cut...

cut through it with an ax, Pa.

Rocks and boulders and...

I had that saddle
for three days.

You know, Pa, that...

that horse tried to
go through places

that-that a worm
couldn't get through.

Had that saddle
almost broken in.

Well, the... the-the
bri... the bridle.

The bridle's in
good, good shape.

Yeah, take a
look at that bridle.

That saddle cost me $100.

- Hundred dollars.
- Yeah.

Hey, well, you-you...
you know... you know,

as-as... as handy
as Hoss is, Pa,

he-he... he could
take all these pieces

and then, and just whip
you up a new saddle, just...

He...

You boys rub down
that horse real good.

Yes, sir.

And I'll see you
two in the house.

Yes, sir.

Here's your, uh... It's part...

What do you think?

Well, I think we just got stuck
for the price of a new saddle.

That's what I think.

Ah.

You sure you couldn't take
these and kind of hook 'em tog...?

Hook... make...?

Honestly.

Well, see boys find way home.

Yes, they found their way home.

Hop Sing think ahead.

Already got half of
pantry cooking on stove.

Well, by the time I get
through with those boys,

they may not have an
appetite left to eat with.

Oh, no matter what happen,

Mr. Hoss got
fine big belly to fill.

He sure has.

- Pa, we've been robbed!
- Robbed. Some dirty rustler.

- Pa, we've been robbed.
- Pa.

- They're gone.
- They're all gone.

All our Gerby Royals.
Gone, been rustled.

The Ger... There's
not a Gerby in the barn.

The cages are gone.
Everything's gone.

I know.

You know?

I sold 'em.

Sold? You sold 'em?

For cash to Barlow and Clyde.

Oh, Pa, Barlow and...
Barlow and Clyde.

Yeah, had to sell
'em at a sacrifice,

but I figure $150 is
better than nothing.

The babies. You sold
the babies and everything?

- Babies and everything.
- Pa, how could you?

How could you sell 'em
to... to them butchers?!

Well, I'll tell you why, Hoss.

I figured I had
to get rid of 'em,

but I also sold them an idea.

I convinced them

that they could make an even
bigger profit off those rabbits

if they sold them at
Easter time as pets.

As pets? As pets?

Yeah.

You mean alive?

Well, of course alive.

Hey, that's a good idea. Alive.

- Hey, then they're all right.
- Of course.

- They're all right.
- Yeah.

Well, the rabbits
are all right, we made

- $150.
- 150 bucks.

Yeah. Hey.

Uh, not quite.

You see, I figure that your
rabbits were really responsible

for ruining my
brand-new $100 saddle.

Now, you're not going to
mind paying for it, will you?

50 bucks. Well,
profit's a profit.

It's a profit, right?
$50. We'll take it.

Uh, not quite.

You see, uh, Nate Swenson
was here a little while ago.

Hey?

Does that ring a
bell? Nate Swenson?

I gave him the
$50 for the horse.

Well... So we broke even.

The rabbits are all
right and we broke even.

- We couldn't ask...
- Uh, not quite.

See, the horse is really $150.

I gave him your $50

and I had to add another
$100 out of my own money

for my birthday present.

Yeah.

Well, you... you-you
know what they always say.

Yeah.

What do they always say?

Yeah. What?

They... uh, they...
oh, they always...

they always say it's-it's
better to-to give than to receive.

Yeah.

You've heard them say that.

Well, I'm glad you
think of it that way, boys.

Because now I know
you're going to be very happy

about giving me your
next three months' wages.

Oh.

My birthday present.

Well... hap... happy birthday.

Happy birthday.

Uh, Joe, what do
you think you're doing?

Oh, I was just gonna try
Pa's horse out a minute.

Joseph, that's a
brand-new saddle. $100.

Well, I know it's a
brand-new saddle, $100.

I'm gonna break it
in a little bit for Pa.

Don't you worry, brother.

Don't you worry.

Where'd he... where'd he go?

I'll give you one big,
jumpin' guess which way.

Oh, no. Get it, get it!

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