All language subtitles for Rake.US.S01E09.Hey.Good.Looking.1080p.WEB-DL.DD5.1.H.264-NTb_track3_[eng]

Come work at the firm.
(LAUGHS)

I've seriously
been thinking about it.

Hello, Mr. Deane.
I'm Cindy Beck.

Cindy?
Your new assistant.

You're such
a mystery to me.

You're just
this delicate,
innocent creature.

Every other minute,
I think that he's going
to find out

everything about my past.

You cost us millions
in billings.

What are you
talking about?

I just won
your case, Bobby.

I'm thinking
about running for DA.

This could be
just the thing
to get you re-energized.

Didn't I suggest
you find a fresh start
somewhere else?

Somewhere
with fewer temptations?

My wife being one of them.

It was autoerotic
asphyxiation.

Tell me,
what did him in?

We haven't heard a thing.

We have to have
a conversation about...

A person of interest
in the mayor's murder.

GLORIA: Is it weird
I don't feel guilty
about this?

KEEGAN: No, not at all.
I don't feel guilty either.

(PANTING)

Then again, it's not
my dead husband's desk.

Oh. Well, I don't think
Marcus would care.

Why do you say that?

Was he showing
signs of depression?

Not at all, no.

I'm late for my dinner.

No, is that...
Does that...

Is that why
they wouldn't release
a cause of death?

Was... Was this a suicide?

No.

Well, you must have
some idea.

I told you,
I'm waiting for
the coroner's report.

I know,
but you're the one
who found him, Gloria.

I mean,
was it a stroke

or a traumatic
head injury?

(SCOFFS)

I'm trying to help you
get a little closure
on this.

It was two weeks ago,

Keegan. I was in shock.
Yeah, but he's a big guy.

It had to take a lot
to bring him down.

He seemed like the type
that worked out.

He was under
a lot of stress.

Oh. Makes him
high risk for
a massive coronary then.

I'm sure
that's what it was.
Can we drop this now?

Yeah, yeah, yeah,
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
Yes, of course.

I won't mention it again.

(DOOR OPENING)

(SPANISH MUSIC PLAYING)
♪ Que Es Esto

♪ Que Es Esto

(SQUAWKING)

(ALL CHEERING)

♪ What is this?

♪ Que Es Esto

♪ Que Es Esto

♪ Que Es Esto?

(LAUGHS)

Hey, Debbie,
I want you to put me down

for 10 grand
on a massive coronary.

No, Victor said
I can't take any more
bets from you, Kee.

Is that why you're not
answering my calls?

Hey, no pagas,
no juegas.

Come on, Debbie,
Victor does sports betting.

You and I have
always had our own
special relationship.

This is an exotic wager.
I know.

But putting 10,000
on the mayor's death
seems kind of dark.

Really?

You gave a woman
from Torrance Action

on how much her tumor
would weigh.

Fine, ten-to-one
on massive coronary.

You want to bet
on the cockfight too?

No. I'm not a degenerate.

Just put me down
on how the mayor died

and keep the chickens
out of it.

It doesn't hurt them.

(CHICKENS SQUAWKING)

Is that
their happy noise?

Yeah.

(PEOPLE CHEERING)

REPORTER: In a huge loss
for the Los Angeles
art community,

Keith Phillips,
the director of
the LA Museum,

plunged to his death
onto a downtown street

in what police
are initially calling
a suicide.

We represent the museum.
Keith was a real mensch.

Yeah, looks like
a real hero.

Jumps into a park
where kids play.

At least he waited
till after bedtime.

That was six months ago,

and the police don't think
he jumped anymore.

They charged
his wife, Holly,
with murder.

You know
who she is, right?

She's the artist
who uses blood
as her medium.

You want me
to defend a woman
who paints in blood?

You've done worse.
No, no, no.

This is why I left
private practice.

You left because
you were desperate.

So show Ebell that
you can make the firm money
as well as lose it.

I won that case.
So win this one too.

We can't afford to lose
any more clients
right now.

She already fired
one attorney

and opening arguments
start today.

Holly Phillips is here.

I thought
they charged the wife,
not the mother.

She is the wife.

Was she his beard?

Keith Phillips wasn't gay.

Well, maybe
you just think that
because he had a beard.

Yeah, it's very hard
to tell with arty types.

They're like Europeans
that way.

A really hot friend of mine
hooked up with him
a couple of times, so...

This hot friend,
how well do you know her?

She was my roommate.

One bedroom or two?

Loft.

Mrs. Phillips,
let me start by saying

I am so sorry things
didn't work out with
your previous attorney.

He wanted me
to take a plea deal

when there was no proof
I committed the crime.

Yeah.

So if you go down
the same route,
I will fire you too.

I'll try to avoid that,

although the prosecution
does have a lot of evidence

to suggest you were
a jealous wife

afraid of losing
her younger husband.

My husband and I
were the same age.

Oh, boy.

(LAUGHS SHEEPISHLY)

Uh...

I... I'm sorry.
We all want to be younger.

I live in LA,
you do too.

We need to have
an honest relationship.

Don't pussyfoot around,
Mr. Deane.

It makes you seem weak.

I know I look a lot older
than my husband,

but we were both 52.

I just wasn't seduced
by LA's superficial values,

unlike you
and my husband,

who jumped off
the deep end
into them, literally.

Whoa, whoa, whoa,
why are you bringing me
into this?

I live in Echo Park.

I apologize. Look...

I've been mourning
for six months,

and now I'm angry,

because I've been accused
of killing my husband
when he killed himself.

This guy?

He looks like
the "after" photo

from an anti-depressant
pamphlet.

It's chemically induced.

Keith went to some
secret, referral-only,

anti-aging specialists,

and they preserved
his outsides

but made his soul suicidal.

Well, that's going to be
very hard to prove

without a statement
from a doctor
or a toxicology report.

Unless you have...

Some of his blood
lying around?

From your art.

Blood holds energy...
Right.

And without its life force,
it's useless to me.

And I don't want
to plea insanity.

Keith jumped.
End of story.

Hey, hey, I'm trying
to help you.

If you want to win,
it's all about
public perception.

You just gotta act sad,
maybe cry a little bit,

leave some flowers
where Keith jumped,

and don't wear anything
blood-stained to court.

Well, I'm working on
a new series
of decapitated men.

Let's keep that
from the jury.
Anything else?

I know that my husband
had other women,
Mr. Deane,

but he loved me.

Ask anyone
who knew us.

He talked about it
all the time.

We'll see what we can do.

My assistant Cindy's
going to show you out.

I'll...hey.

LEANNE:
Your assistant, Cindy?

When were you
going to tell me

you replaced me
with a woman you want
to have sex with?

Hey, that's not
what happened.

Cindy is a temp,
and quite possibly
a lesbian.

You didn't even have
the nerve to fire me.
Unbelievable.

You're not fired.

I'd quit if I wasn't
an illegal alien.

What am I supposed
to do, nanny?

You still work for me.

You don't count.

Look, here,
I can pay you.

I'll pay you
a little bit of cash,

and I got
some car vouchers for you.

Take that for now,
all right,

until HR works out
your immigration paperwork.

And I want a proper desk.

I'm not going back
to your apartment.

Fine. In the meantime,
see if you can find out

any information about
this anti-aging doctor,
all right?

Bruce?

What are you doing?

I was just
staying in shape
while I waited.

I know how much
you love the capoeira.

It's less appealing now
that we're broken up.

You know,
I was hoping to talk
to you about that.

Here, man,
let me help.
Uh...

It's fine.
Okay, okay.

We've already talked,
and frankly, Bruce,

that juice you sent over,

it made me feel
uncomfortable.

I'm sorry. I... I just...
I'd never named
a special blend

after someone before.

I mean, yeah, there was
"Obama-rama," but...

You should leave.

(THUDDING)
Oh, here,
you dropped this.

Look, I talked
to my therapist,

and we both agreed
that you're scared

that I'm not ready
to commit...

I don't want you
to commit!

I know how terrifying
intimacy can be,

especially after
your ex-husband
abandoned you,

but I want you to know,
I would never
do that, okay?

Kee didn't abandon me.
I kicked him out.

Look, it's okay
if you need to test me.

I'm willing
to prove to you

that I am
not going anywhere

by not going anywhere.

I can sleep here,
I can wake up here,

I can stay here
as long as it takes.

Hey, got any aggression
you want to work out?

KEEGAN: Sure,
just meet me at my place.

That way, you can
make those nasty
growling noises

without Finn ever having
to hear anything.

Not that kind
of aggression.

I mean the kind that
you wanted to use
to get rid of Bruce.

He's on my lawn

doing his Brazilian
fight dancing

and it's starting
to creep me out.

Hey, I told you
he was creepy.

MADDY: You were right.

Oh! Hear that?

You're on speaker,
say it again.

Kee, are you
going to help me
or should I call the police?

Hey, hey,
Bruce isn't doing anything
threatening to you, is he?

Not unless you count
my rebirth experience.

What?
Nothing.

I'll talk to him, okay?

In the meantime,
just find something else
for him to obsess about.

Like what?
Rescue dogs.

Keith Phillips
had everything to live for,

except for a jealous wife

who knew he was in love
with another woman.

He told them all
he loved them.

The state
will present witnesses

who saw her fight
with her husband

before he plunged
to his death,

witnesses who saw Keith
covered with bruises

and tales of
her domestic violence.

They were from
the hormone injections
and my blood draws.

And a witness
who saw Holly
threaten her husband...

With a gun.

KEEGAN: You don't
mention this to me?

Are you out
of your mind?

It was a joke.
Have you seen
my work?

I have a macabre
sense of humor.

Yeah, I got a great
sense of humor, Holly,
and I'm not laughing.

Listen, you're going
to need to find
this anti-aging doctor.

Well, I'll look through
Keith's things again.

I don't know why...
The case is still
circumstantial.

Some circumstances are
worse than others, Holly,

Guns for example.

Keegan Deane, would you
come down to the station
with us, please?

Why would I do that?

Bernie Michaels
wants to talk to you.

Oh, does he want
to kiss my ass?

Hold on
for a second, Holly.

What, did he send you
over here

on some trumped-up
harassment charge?

I went by his house
at a very reasonable hour,

rang the doorbell.

All very friendly, guys.

He named you
as a person of interest
in the mayor's death.

Okay, nice try.

He doesn't even work
at the force anymore.

So unless
you got a warrant...

Anybody got
a warrant here?

How you doin',
by the way?

My only interest
in his death

is as a celebrant
after the fact.

Sorry about that.
Everything okay?

Yeah, the mayor's dead.
I'm great.

Murderer! Murderer!

Keegan!
(YELLING IN CHINESE)

What?
(YELLING IN CHINESE)

Now, just hold on!

SUSIE: Did you
kill the mayor?

Mr. Deane,
did you kill the mayor?

You've got to be joking.

How do you respond
to word from the LAPD.

That you're
the lead suspect
in his murder?

I deny it! I deny it!

That's the work
of one rogue ex-cop
who's out to get me.

That's it.
Off my property!

Do you also deny
that you despised
Mayor Barzmann?

Hey, I despise
a lot of people,
many of them still alive.

That is my trash, sir!

Excuse me. Hey!
Come here, come here.

Okay, hey, hey, hey!

That's my trash!
Ow!

(BINS CLATTERING)

MAN: Is that what you did
to the mayor?

(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)

(CROWS CAWING)

NEWS REPORTER:
Keegan Deane, newly named
as the lead suspect...

BEN: Mom, no!

REPORTER:
In the murder of beloved
Los Angeles mayor...

No, Mom,
I'm not firing Kee.

If I were DA,
I would prosecute
my friend...

Because he didn't
kill the mayor.

Zoe said Uncle Kee's
a murderer.

If he is,
can he come to my class

for career day
instead of you?

He's not a murderer,
and no,

I have my presentation
all planned, dude.

SCARLET: Why are you
not dressed? Go.

Zoe!

That was
the policeman's union,

threatening to pull
my endorsement

if I don't publicly
disavow Kee.

I hope you said no.
Of course.

Told them
I'd think about it.

What?

No one's going
to elect a DA who's
friends with a murderer.

They will
when Fairfax Freddy Barnes

is the only
other guy running.

You know, the ballot's
not closed yet.

Other candidates
can still declare.

Zoe said uncle Kee
could come to kill us too.

I told you, your uncle Kee
didn't kill anyone.

He hasn't even
been accused,

which your mom,
the attorney, knows

means the police
have no evidence.

If you're not dressed
in two minutes,

I'm going to come
pick your outfit...

Out of your sister's closet.

Zoe!

Maybe you ask Kee
not to come over,

and maybe
you should steer clear
of the law firm,

just until
this whole thing
blows over.

What are you saying?

Honey, you know
Kee didn't do this.

No, I know, but he does
make bad decisions.

Not to murder Marcus.
I don't...

Say it, Scarlet.
I already told you...

I don't think
Kee murdered Marcus.

Not think, know.

I know that Kee wouldn't
murder anyone...

On purpose.

(PHONE RINGING)

When he's sober.
Are you serious?

This Is... I have to...
Councilman Hawkins.

You know what,
this is going to be
a conversation.

I do know him.
(PHONE RINGING)

BEN: Hello, Robert.

Well, that depends
on how you define
friendship.

No, I haven't given
any more thought
to firing Keegan Deane.

NEWS REPORTER:
Now, seen here
in our exclusive footage...

Hey, this is fantastic.
What?

No, it's better
than fantastic,
it is phenomenal.

NEWS REPORTER:
Question is,
what's he hiding in there?

Get outta here!

(DAVID LAUGHING)

(INDISTINCT SHOUTING)

(CLICKS OFF)
That's awful.

Oh, no, the mayor's
being murdered
is tragic,

I agree,
but what is phenomenal

is Keegan Deane
finally being exposed
for what he is, a sociopath.

Really?

Yeah, do you have
any idea what that guy's
gotten away with?

You know,
he beat up a lawyer
in the elevator

of One California
for no reason at all.

I'm sure that
if he did that,
he had a reason.

Baby, you don't know him
like I do.

The guy's a psychopath.

You just said
that he was a sociopath.

So which one is it,
psychopath or sociopath?

They're not the same.

I'm not actually qualified
to speak

to the exact nature
of his pathology.

What I do know is that

every word that
comes out of his mouth
is a self-serving lie.

Lying doesn't make someone
a bad person, David.

Or mean that Kee
killed anyone.

When did you start
calling him Kee?

What?

I thought,
you only met him

through your cousin
who molested you?

Yeah, I did,

but he was there for Angus
when everybody else
abandoned him.

Keegan played backgammon
with him every day

while we waited
for the liver transplant.

Really?
They play for money?

'Cause had to be
something in it for him.

No one can hide
their true nature.

Doesn't everybody deserve
the benefit of the doubt?

No.

Baby, I love
how compassionate
you are,

but people
like Keegan Deane
aren't redeemable.

Well, I disagree.

(DOOR OPENING)
Hey.

It's our first fight.

It's a good thing.

Is that my paper?

You know,
it's a good thing

I'm a man of my word

and was here
to protect you,

now that your ex-husband
is on the loose.

Sorry, did Kee show up
last night?

You didn't hurt him,
did you?

No, I didn't get
the chance.

I'm assuming he's hiding
from the police.

For killing the mayor.

What?

I mean, they haven't
formally charged him,

but jury's in.

Well, actually, Bruce,
the jury doesn't come in

unless there's a trial,
which there won't be,

because Kee
did not do this.

I saw violence
in his eyes

when he tried to grab
the shovel from me.

Clearly not enough,
because you're still here.

I would risk bodily harm
to earn your trust.

Let's hope
it comes to that.

Soon.

And Kee didn't do it!

Mr. Deane.

So glad
you changed your mind
and decided to come in.

You realize you no longer
work here, Bernie, right?

Well, my name
isn't on the door,

but it doesn't mean
I'm not in charge.

I'm going to say,
"Well played."

You win.

Congratulations.

You know I didn't kill
Mayor Barzmann.

Would you please
call off the dogs?

Where were you
march 20th

between 2:00 a.m.
and 5:00 a.m.?

I don't know,
I'm going to go out on
a limb and say...bed.

Can anyone
corroborate that?

They can't.

So you have no alibi.

I'm not going
to ruin the reputation
of some young lady

for your amusement, Bernie.

Now, tell me
what the hell
it's going to take

to get the press
off my ass.

Yeah, those reporters
are annoying,
aren't they?

They were up mine
for months

after you stirred up
that false confession
scandal,

so get used to them,

and don't make
any travel plans.

Only place I'm going
is your house

to get it appraised
for my very lucrative
harassment suit.

(DOOR OPENING)

Your wife can stay
and help me redecorate.

Freak.

GLORIA: Hello?

Hey, Gloria.

Thought you should know,

Bernie Michaels
and his detective friend
are asking

about my alibi
the night Marcus died.

You didn't tell him
we were together, did you?

No. I consider myself
a gentleman.

But if you'd tell Bernie
I didn't kill your husband,
I'd appreciate it.

I'll take care of it
right away.

Thanks.

Hey! Murderer!

Oh!

Candy bar?

This isn't an insult,
it's a gift!

You just made my day!

(REPORTERS CLAMORING)

Son of a...

(TALKING INDISTINCTLY)

Mr. Deane.
Kee, I have your messages.

Great, great.

What's going on
over here?

It's an office pool.

Oh, for me!

CINDY: I'm sorry,
I tried to get them
to stop.

No, no, it's fine,
put me down for 1,000,
no arrest.

There's a $20 limit.

Then put me down for 20,
50 times.

Did you put your 20 in?

I don't gamble.

It's not gambling
if you can't lose.

Mr. Deane,
I was coming to see you.

(CLEARS THROAT) Holly.
Good to see you.

I just want to say,

the accusations against me
are completely false.

I understand,
seeing as I'm in
the same situation.

No, you're not.

I mean, it's just
a little different,

because I haven't been
charged with a crime,
and you have,

which is why I'm able
to represent you.

(CHUCKLES)
I'm not firing you.

Even though
you did look guilty
and unrepentant

on the news last night.

You could have called
to tell me that.

Well, I thought
that I'd bring you

a brighter tie
for court tomorrow.

Our talk the other day
made me realize

that appearances
do matter,

so I thought
I'd try and follow
your suggestions.

Thank you very much, Holly.

Not necessary, though,
because I'm innocent.

(LAUGHS)

(PHONE BEEPS)
Ugh!

That was
the Teachers Union

threatening to pull
their endorsement too.

You can't give in.

It would crush Kee
if you come out
against him.

So what do you
want me to do?

Get up and make a speech

that my friend
Keegan Deane,

notorious womanizer,
gambler, debtor,
and cocaine abuser

is an innocent man?

You don't have to
publicly support him.

Just don't publicly
denounce him.

Who's publicly
denouncing who?
BEN: (LAUGHING) Hey.

Hmm? What'd I miss?

I have to get this.

It's not ringing.

Yeah, well, it will be.

She's just worried about
losing her endorsements.

Just lost my endorsement.
That'll make her happy.

Then I completely
support her.

I'm putting
her campaign poster
on my window!

I got your back
on this, Kee.
Oh.

How the hell
did this happen?

I don't know.
Bernie Michaels.

Might have overstepped,
said a few things.

Maybe urinated
on his lawn.

I didn't think
he was going to be
this sensitive.

Can't you go apologize?

This press is bad.

My mother and Ebell are
so far up my ass about it,
I can taste 'em.

Any more
descriptive detail
than that?

No, I want it to end.

It will end.
I talked to Gloria.

Marcus's wife, Gloria?

Yeah, she's my alibi.

You were with Gloria
when Marcus died?

Yeah.

You're having an affair
with the mayor's wife?

No, no.

"An affair" sounds like
an emotional co-mingling.

How the hell
could you not tell me

you were banging
the mayor's wife

before you came
to work at my firm?

That's the kind of thing
you share with a friend

whose business
it could ruin.

What is wrong with you?

Holly Phillips
has no problem
with this at all.

You wanted me
to handle this case,
it's handled.

Make it go away.
Fine.

You know, none of this
would've happened

if that son of a bitch
hadn't of died.

Mr. Deane,
someone named Leanne
is on the phone for you.

She said
she was your assistant,

but I told her
I was your assistant.

She's in the phone.
You're on the flesh.

She's a phone assistant,
you're a flesh...

You're my in-the-flesh
assistant. See?

Okay, well,
she's on the phone now.

(CELL PHONE BEEPING)

(LEANNE LAUGHING)

Something funny?

I have an internet alert,

so every time
your name gets mentioned,
it sends me the article.

(CELL PHONE BEEPS)
Oh.

Which of
my amusing anecdotes
are they quoting this time?

Actually, it's acclaimed
LA attorney Clay Randolph
who's quoted.

(SCOFFS)
"Mr. Deane
not only assaulted me,

"he manipulated his way
into my home

"and threatened
my wife's virtue."

His wife's virtue.
(CELL PHONE BEEPS)

This from a guy
who tried to rape
a prostitute.

A woman named Jessica
said you had sex with her
in your racecar bed

and never called.

Jessica?
Wait, wait, no, no, no.

That wasn't my bed,
that was Max's.

Ben's son, Max?

You had sex
in your best friend's
child's bed?

I don't think
I'd cast stones here, Leanne,

after what you did
in my bed with Roy,

a married man
with a pregnant wife.

You swore you'd never
mention that again.

That was a mistake,
and I'd like to forget
about it.

Mmm.
(CELL PHONE BEEPS)

Unless he calls
and asks about me,
then you should tell me.

Well, not after
you invited me down here
to listen to this pinging

and pretend
you don't know me
in this ridiculous hat.

This hat has nothing
to do with you.

The anti-aging doctor
suggests it

to protect delicate skin
against the California sun.

Keith Phillips's
anti-aging doctor?
Did you find him?

And I'll give you
all of his information

as soon as I get
a proper office.

(SPITS) Murderer!

Hey!

Listen, that's illegal,
to ride on the sidewalk!

You're the criminal, pal!

He's the criminal.
(CELL PHONE BEEPS)

Would you please turn
that thing off, Leanne?
(GIGGLING)

All right? I need
some information here.

(CELL PHONE BEEPS)
Murderer!

Whoa, hey!

You probably
didn't even like Barzmann.

Just because he's dead
doesn't make him
a saint, lady.

You understand that?

There's a whole process
at the Vatican for that.

He doesn't qualify.

Help! Police!

(CELL PHONE BEEPS)

Probably better
if I go see
the doctor myself.

LEANNE: Thank you
for seeing me on such
short notice, Dr. Kelly.

Of course. The earlier
you start anti-aging
the better.

The goal is to catch
hormonal systems

before they're
out of balance.

Ah, I'm not here
as a patient.

Although,
how would I know

if my hormonal system
was out of balance?

Well, it starts
with subtle changes
in hair and skin.

There's also an increase
in sensitivity.

Sensitivity in my skin?

Like wanting
someone to touch it
all the time?

Well, testosterone surges

can cause an increase
in sexual desire.

Do you have a cure
for that?

Not for desire in general,

but desire
for someone undesirable.

Well, my body-in-balance
program could even out
that sex drive.

It could also
stop the sagging
around your eyes.

Any chance
of some free samples?

I don't give it away.

Are you implying
that I do?

Because I don't usually.

And I don't have
sagging around my eyes.

I look like a normal,
attractive woman
in my early 30s.

Maybe in England.

Is this what you did
to Keith Phillips?

Made him feel insecure
so he'd sign up

for your body-in-balance
program,

even with the crazy
side effects?

If this is why
you came in,

I'm not willing
to discuss it.

The doctor/patient privilege
doesn't apply

once the patient's
passed away.

Or we could just
subpoena Keith's records.

Mr. Phillips
was not my patient.

Did you treat someone else
in the Phillips family?

KEEGAN:
So what, we're back
to the scene of the crime?

You're the one
who was seeing Dr. Kelly.

It was you.

What I don't get is why
you killed your husband

instead of the quack
who took all your money

and left you
looking like an old lady.

Because he
wasn't the one
who made me feel insane.

You sure about that?

Jacked you up
with all those
hormone treatments.

It's hard enough
to live in LA
and age gracefully.

Try waking up
next to Dorian Grey
every day.

I mean, he didn't even
want me to dye my hair
or get a facial.

I couldn't take it anymore.

I wanted us to be
a couple again.

He was furious
that I was seeing
Dr. Kelly.

Not a very sympathetic
motivation for murder.

It was a lie,
Mr. Deane.

He wanted me to look old
so that he could look
like a saint.

He would take me
to parties

so everyone
could admire him

as "That hot young guy
who stayed with
the old lady

"because he loves her
as an artist."

So he used you
like a puppy

in order
to get other women?

Well, I don't
like puppies.
No.

But yes.

Took me a long time
to figure out

why he would always be
so loving to me in public

but never look at me
when we were alone.

I thought
I was losing my mind.

That's when
I pulled the gun.

I wanted him
to tell me the truth.

Why didn't you just
divorce him?

Humiliating as it was,
I still loved him.

When he stopped
the payments
to Dr. Kelly,

I came up here
because I was the one
who was going to jump.

Keith tried to stop me,
that's what we were
fighting about.

I wanted him to admit
that he didn't love me,

that he only
stayed with me

because it made him
look like a good guy,
but he wouldn't.

I understand, but these
anti-aging treatments,

you have a real
insanity defense here.

I can help you.
Let me enter a plea.

Crazy is good for art,
Mr. Deane, insanity isn't.

I... I don't want to go
to a mental institution.

That's why I came to you.

You get guilty people off.

Uh, no, no, no,
changed my mind.
Keep driving.

MRS. WU:
Do you want some food?

Come into my cafe.
If not, go.

Damn it.

One more step,
I'm calling the police.

Great, they can arrest you
for stalking my wife.

Ex-wife, okay?
Ex-wife.

Although the psychological
pain you've inflicted

continues to
wreak havoc on her
healthy relationships.

Do you call camping out
on her front lawn
a healthy relationship?

I'm showing her
that I'm a man of my word,

unlike some other men
that she knows.

Bruce, you get punched
in the face a lot?

Is that a challenge?

Dude, if that's a challenge,
it is on,

right now at my dojo.

Maddy can come watch
if she wants.

No, no, no.
Maddy!

No, she's not going
to your dojo, Bruce.

Nobody's going
to your dojo.

I'm not, nobody is.
All right?

You're going to get
the hell outta here...
Hey. Hey.

Come on!
What are you doing?

And you're going to get
your juice buckets,

and you're going to get
the hell off this lawn,

otherwise, all the people
who think I killed the mayor

are going to think
I killed you too!

I'm not going
'cause I'm scared.

I'm going 'cause
I have enough respect
for Maddy

not to cause a big scene
in her yard.

All right.

(GRUNTS)

That was not cool,
with the chair!

(CAR ENGINE STARTS)

Thank you.

I should probably
stay around
for a few days

in case he tries
to come back.

Let me guess,
there are reporters
at your place.

And I'm concerned
for your safety.

Just a couple of days.

I didn't like your chances
at the dojo.

The dojo!
(LAUGHS)

I could've taken him.

I agree with
the prosecution.

My client looks guilty.

But that's not enough
to convict somebody
of murder.

Lot of you have kids.

What do you teach
your kids?

Don't judge
a book by its cover,
it's wrong.

We do it anyway.
Look around this room.

How about this guy?
Look at the snazzy
prosecutor over here

in the little bowtie.

Makes him look smart.

What you don't know
is that his wife
buys him those bowties

because deep down,
she's worried that
he's not smart enough.

This guy over here,
this bailiff.

I've seen you eyeballing him.

Lazy civil servant.

What you don't know is,
his name is Todd,

and he's exhausted
from working three jobs

to put his twin daughters
through medical school.

And how 'bout me?

People all over
the internet saying
I don't pay my debts,

that I act irresponsibly
around children.

They're trying
to make me out
to be the guy

who murdered the mayor,
which I didn't.

Seriously.

The point is,
looks can be deceiving.

That is why
you need proof

to convict somebody
of a crime.

Now, I understand
Holly Phillips
paints in blood,

I understand it's odd,

and she looks
considerably older
than her husband,

and she looks
a little angry.

It doesn't matter.

The only thing
that matters is
you have no proof...

That she murdered
her husband.

Come on,
let's put it to a vote.

Come on, people.
Only five for guilty?

You heard the witnesses.
They didn't see a murder.

I'm sorry, I thought
you'd reached a decision.

We have.

We were talking about
whether Keegan Deane
killed the mayor.

But we found her
not guilty.

Should we make a statement
about how happy we are
with the verdict?

No, no.
That's the last thing
we're going to do,

and they're not here
for you anyway.

Well, I'm definitely
going to send you
one of my new paintings

to say thank you.

Or you could just move
to the Midwest

or one of the Portlands.

One of the places
they don't believe
in Botox.

(LAUGHS) You're funny.

But I've been
seeing someone

who lives
in Santa Monica.

Hi, George.

No, no, no.
Are you out of your mind?

After everything
that happened with Keith?

Well, I got used to
a certain aesthetic,

and unlike
my former husband,
George is into cougars.

Holly, any harm
comes to that young man,
I'm coming after you.

(LAUGHS)

Justice system
wasn't built for that!

It's built to protect
the innocent.

(GRUNTS) God!

Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!

Keegan Deane,
you're under arrest

for the murder
of Mayor Marcus Barzmann.

You have the right
to remain silent.

Anything you say
can and will be...

Gloria, it's Keegan Deane.
I want to talk to you.

Better yet,
I want you to talk
to Bernie Michaels.

We're down here at
the 29th street precinct.

Please call me...soon.

(BEEPS)
Book him.

You shouldn't take orders
from this guy.

He lost his job
for forging confessions.

Yeah, feel free
to beat one out of him.

Is that a threat?

'Cause I'm recording
all this right up here,
Bernie.

All in the noggin.

(PHONE RINGING)

What, this?
Yeah, against the wall.

Mrs. Barzmann.

Yeah, I'm down here
with Keegan Deane.

Yeah, he said
that you know
where he was

at the time
of Marcus's murder.

No? Really?

You have no idea
what he's talking about?

Give me that thing.

Gloria, it's Kee.

GLORIA ON PHONE:
I'm sorry.

I can't help you
with this.

Please don't call me again.

You're not going
to get away
with this, Bernie.

You need evidence
to convict somebody
of a crime.

My officers should
have no problem

finding the belt that
Marcus was strangled with
in your apartment.

I have the right
to an attorney,
other than myself.

I want to talk to Ben Leon.

Hey, what goes around
comes around, ass wipe.

Nice to see you
in your element, Deane,
suits you.

Sanders. Hey!

I said I wanted to see
my attorney.

This jackass
does not represent me.

Why Mikhaela thinks
you deserve compassion
is beyond me.

Oh, is that why
you're here, Harry?

Did your girlfriend
send you over here
on a little mission?

Mikhaela has nothing
to do with this.

Look, I believe that you
belong behind bars,

I just didn't feel right

knowing it was for a crime
that you didn't commit.

So you know
I didn't do it?

How can you be
so sure, Harry?

Unless you know who did.

No, I just...

Have some
pertinent information.

If I tell you this,

you have to agree

that you never heard it
from me.

If you tell anyone
what I'm about
to tell you,

I will deny it
on the lives

of all my family members,
including pets.

I'm dying here.
Can you just spit it out?

Mayor Barzmann...

Had a hobby.

That...involved
cutting off his airways

while he induced
sexual excitement.

(LAUGHS)

Autoerotic asphyxiation?

Yeah. Of course you'd know
the technical term for it.

It's right on the tip
of your tongue there,
wasn't it?

He's a gasper, huh?

What, did you two
hang out in online
chat rooms together?

How do you know this?
No, no.

Look... (LAUGHS)
Okay, you know what?

I know, I know, you think
working for the IRS.

Is just a bunch of boring
number crunching,

but I gotta tell you
something, pal.

We're in deeper
than the NSA, okay?

Our investigations
are very thorough.

So what did he spend it on?
Was it ropes? Belts?

That's it, huh?

Right, the belt
Bernie planted in
my apartment.

There may have
been an audit

on a custom
leather worker
in the valley

who specializes
in making 72-inch belts

for men with 38-inch waists.

You did not hear that
from me.

So good luck, I guess.

David.

Thank you.

Don't get Mikhaela
mixed up in

any of your perversions,
you freak.

I hope you rot in here.

I like this kinky side
of you, Potter.

Whoo!

(DOOR OPENING)

(DOOR CLOSING)

Hey.
Hey.

I finally
threatened the LAPD

with a wrongful
imprisonment suit
and got Kee out.

You're Kee's attorney?
Yup.

That's now a matter
of public record.

Yup.

(STUTTERING)
Ben, how did you
not think

you should discuss
this with me first?

There's nothing
to discuss.
I did what's right.

You're just too wrapped up
in your campaign to see it.

That is because being DA
is important to me.

Kee getting
beaten up in jail
isn't in the way of that.

Oh, my God,
I cannot believe this.

Fairfax Freddy's
been campaigning

on the same street corner
the last ten elections.

Oh, please,
yes, that's right,

and voters can still
vote for him

if the other candidate
is friends with the guy
that murdered the mayor, Ben.

Stop. Kee didn't do it.

You need to stop
acting like a selfish brat
and be there for him.

I'm selfish?

Why?

Because I don't want
the next 20 years

to feel like
the last 20 years?
Is that why?

What's wrong
with the last 20 years?

We got married
and had our kids.

Being DA is...

It feels like that thing
that we were talking about.

The thing that
I've been looking for.

I want it, and if
you don't want it,
that is a problem.

So this is about us now?

Did you just hear
anything I just said?

This is about...

Having something
that makes me happy.

I want that too.
Good.

I just don't want you
to sell Kee out to get it.

You know that
I would help him
if I could.

You can.

Earl Grey okay?
Sure.

I only have
a few minutes

before the city council
meeting,

but you sounded so upset.

You and Ben okay?

Actually, it wasn't me
who needed to talk.

Nice to see you again,
Gloria.

You called me here
to talk to him?

I'm sorry
that I couldn't be
more forthcoming,

but Kee said
you knew he was innocent.

Yeah, where do you
come out on that, Scarlet?

I'm going to leave
you two alone.

I can't be here.

Hey, hey, listen,
when you found Marcus,

I just want to know,

did he have, like,
on a wig and some
ladies frilly lingerie,

or did he go old school,

with the pants down
around the ankles

and a belt strapped
around his neck,

with rigor mortis
setting in?

I have a 72-inch belt
that's got stories
to tell, Gloria.

How did you find out?

What does it
possibly matter
how I found out,

now that I know
it's the truth?

I didn't want Marcus
to be remembered
like that,

and Bernie was
supposed to make sure
nobody found out.

By charging me
with murder?

No, he had someone
at the coroner's office

who was going
to take care of it

until you showed up
to his house
to antagonize him.

That's when
he decided to make you
a murder suspect.

You brought this
on yourself.

No, no, no,
I didn't bring anything
on myself, Gloria,

because you're my alibi,
you understand?

Bernie already knew
about us.

When I went to ask him
to drop the investigation,

he said he was
following me for Marcus.

He said that
if I didn't cooperate,

that he would name me
as a co-conspirator,

and I deserved it
for sleeping with you.

Now, what was I
supposed to do, Keegan?

Why didn't you just
tell him the truth?

And go to prison
for the rest of my life?

Or be known as the wife
of the mayor

who died doing that
to himself?

Those are two very
distinct possibilities
if I go to trial.

You need
to call Bernie off
before that happens.

How?

I have an idea.

NEWS REPORTER:
After weeks
of speculation...

I hope you'll use this
as a learning experience.

If you mean
stay away from
autoerotic asphyxiation,

lesson learned.

And don't piss off
ex-police chiefs

or have sex
with married women.
I can't hear.

I'd like to thank
the city council

for asking me to take
my husband's seat

until his term ends
next year.

I can't think
of a better way
to honor Marcus's memory

than to continue
his mission

as mayor of Los Angeles.

I'd also like
to officially apologize

to Keegan Deane.

His arrest was driven

by one former officer
of the LAPD,

who was already
under investigation.

Bernie Michaels lost
his fragile grip on reality

and used his position
to spread lies
and persecution.

For everyone's safety,
we have placed him

on a 72-hour
psychological hold,

and we hope that he gets
the help that he needs.

Nice touch
with the mental hospital.

Yeah, it just felt right.

The coroner's report
determined there was
no foul play

involved in
my husband's death.

Unless you count
self-play.
(SHUSHING)

He died of...

Here it is.

A massive...coronary.

Boom! Goes the dynamite!
(LAUGHING)

You bet on how he died.

That's ten-to-one.

I deducted
what you owe me

plus interest, rent,

and the cost
of new trash cans
with padlocks

for my aunt's place.

Want to stay and watch
the next cockfight?

You can sit with me
in the VIP section.

I told you,
cocks aren't my thing.

You sure?
I have an inside tip

Mother Mercy's
going to peck the crap
out of The Sky Is Falling.

(SCOFFS)
"The Sky Is Falling."

(CHICKENS CLUCKING)

That's Chicken Little,
right?

Yeah, I like that story.

(CHICKEN CLUCKING)

That's Mother Mercy?

He... He doesn't
have a chance.

You want to bet?

All right, I'll support
the little guy.

Here you go.

Take that.
Is it even money?
Yup.

Take this too.
Great.

(BIRDS SQUAWKING)
Come on. Come on, sky.

Come on, sky.

(SQUAWKING)
Hey.

Mother mercy, my ass.

What's he doing
with his claw?

(CHICKENS SQUAWKING)

Come on, come on,
come on.

Peck him back!

Come on, baby!

Come on! Do it!