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1
00:00:37,300 --> 00:00:38,700
- Ah, good evening.
- Good evening.
2
00:00:41,300 --> 00:00:42,633
I see that the meaning
of the word punctuality
3
00:00:42,733 --> 00:00:46,967
hasn't yet sunk in with
certain members of our class.
4
00:00:48,633 --> 00:00:50,000
You see, Max?
5
00:00:50,100 --> 00:00:51,633
I thought we would be
here before professori.
6
00:00:51,733 --> 00:00:53,333
Better sit down
before he comes.
7
00:00:53,433 --> 00:00:55,133
Okey dokey.
8
00:00:55,233 --> 00:00:57,200
Good evening.
9
00:00:57,300 --> 00:01:00,533
How did you get in,
through the window?
10
00:01:00,633 --> 00:01:01,667
You're late.
11
00:01:01,767 --> 00:01:03,567
Too busy drinking in the
pub to notice the time?
12
00:01:03,667 --> 00:01:07,567
Well, we've not been in
the pub, haven't we, Max?
13
00:01:07,667 --> 00:01:09,200
Sure, we haven't.
14
00:01:09,300 --> 00:01:10,467
Look.
15
00:01:10,567 --> 00:01:12,300
We were coming to the school,
and we see this old lady
16
00:01:12,400 --> 00:01:14,133
trying to cross the road.
- That's right.
17
00:01:14,233 --> 00:01:16,000
She was very old.
- And very blind.
18
00:01:16,100 --> 00:01:17,333
Yeah, pushing a pram.
19
00:01:19,967 --> 00:01:23,100
An old, blind
lady, pushing a pram?
20
00:01:23,200 --> 00:01:25,533
Well, maybe she
wasn't exactly blind.
21
00:01:25,633 --> 00:01:28,433
Maybe she wasn't
exactly there, either.
22
00:01:28,533 --> 00:01:31,133
Sure, it's true.
23
00:01:31,233 --> 00:01:34,933
On Max's life, we have
not been in the pub, honest.
24
00:01:35,033 --> 00:01:37,267
All right.
25
00:01:37,367 --> 00:01:40,267
Hey, you left your
books in the pub.
26
00:01:42,900 --> 00:01:45,167
What's the matter?
27
00:01:45,267 --> 00:01:47,367
Look behind you.
28
00:01:50,200 --> 00:01:53,567
Not been in the pub, eh?
29
00:01:53,667 --> 00:01:54,700
Now I remember.
30
00:01:54,800 --> 00:01:56,600
We were there,
just for a minute.
31
00:01:56,700 --> 00:01:57,533
Come on.
32
00:01:57,633 --> 00:01:58,733
Sit down, all of you.
33
00:01:58,833 --> 00:02:01,967
Hey, why you not tell me
the teacher's behind me,
34
00:02:02,067 --> 00:02:03,300
you Italian macaroni?
35
00:02:03,400 --> 00:02:08,100
Why, you-- you lump
of Spanish omelette.
36
00:02:08,200 --> 00:02:09,000
All right, come on.
37
00:02:09,100 --> 00:02:09,967
Sit down and be quiet.
38
00:02:10,067 --> 00:02:10,933
Yeah, teacher is right.
39
00:02:11,033 --> 00:02:12,100
You, sit down.
Sit down.
40
00:02:12,200 --> 00:02:13,533
Be quiet.
Go on.
41
00:02:13,633 --> 00:02:14,667
Sit down.
Go.
42
00:02:14,767 --> 00:02:15,633
Sit down.
Sit down.
43
00:02:15,733 --> 00:02:17,667
Yeah, Juan, that includes you.
44
00:02:17,767 --> 00:02:18,600
Por favor?
45
00:02:18,700 --> 00:02:20,000
You heard.
46
00:02:20,100 --> 00:02:21,300
Sit down.
47
00:02:21,400 --> 00:02:22,900
I'm getting rather tired
of this continual habit
48
00:02:23,000 --> 00:02:24,333
of certain people being late.
49
00:02:24,433 --> 00:02:26,400
Now 7:30 is the time
class commences,
50
00:02:26,500 --> 00:02:28,067
and you should all be
sitting at your desks,
51
00:02:28,167 --> 00:02:29,100
ready to begin work.
52
00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:30,633
Now I shan't tell you again.
53
00:02:30,733 --> 00:02:33,333
In the future, anybody who comes
late will go straight home.
54
00:02:33,433 --> 00:02:36,567
Good evening, everybody.
55
00:02:36,667 --> 00:02:37,800
You're late.
56
00:02:37,900 --> 00:02:38,933
Late?
57
00:02:39,033 --> 00:02:40,400
Oh, no, look, please.
58
00:02:40,500 --> 00:02:41,500
I am being early.
59
00:02:41,600 --> 00:02:43,967
It is only 20 minutes
past the 7 o'clock.
60
00:02:44,067 --> 00:02:46,800
Correction, it is 25
minutes to the 8:00.
61
00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:48,333
That clock is not
being right at all.
62
00:02:48,433 --> 00:02:52,933
Ah, and I suppose my watch
is not being right also?
63
00:02:53,033 --> 00:02:54,400
Yes, please.
64
00:02:54,500 --> 00:02:55,867
Has it occurred
to you that it might
65
00:02:55,967 --> 00:02:57,333
be your watch that is wrong?
66
00:02:57,433 --> 00:03:00,700
Oh, blimey, this watch is
guaranteed never to be wrong.
67
00:03:00,800 --> 00:03:02,200
It is 21 Julies.
68
00:03:04,900 --> 00:03:06,400
Jewels.
69
00:03:06,500 --> 00:03:09,367
Yes, please, I am buying it
today from the marketplace.
70
00:03:09,467 --> 00:03:11,867
You bought that watch
from a stall in the market?
71
00:03:11,967 --> 00:03:14,100
Most definitely,
the man is telling me
72
00:03:14,200 --> 00:03:17,200
it is jolly good
bargain, 21 Julies
73
00:03:17,300 --> 00:03:20,267
and real gold case, 18 turnips.
74
00:03:23,400 --> 00:03:24,733
18 karats.
75
00:03:24,833 --> 00:03:27,700
Sorry, please.
76
00:03:27,800 --> 00:03:30,167
Well, how much did you
pay for this 21-jewel,
77
00:03:30,267 --> 00:03:31,833
18-karat gold timepiece?
78
00:03:31,933 --> 00:03:35,267
Uh, 2 pound 50 pence.
79
00:03:35,367 --> 00:03:38,133
I think he saw
you coming, Ali.
80
00:03:38,233 --> 00:03:40,400
Ah, most definitely,
he was seeing me
81
00:03:40,500 --> 00:03:43,067
coming before I was seeing him.
82
00:03:43,167 --> 00:03:44,767
What I mean is
you were swindled.
83
00:03:44,867 --> 00:03:46,067
Oh, no.
84
00:03:46,167 --> 00:03:47,900
Well, you can't buy a
watch for 2 pounds 50.
85
00:03:48,000 --> 00:03:51,467
Ah, but the man is telling me
it is being so cheap because it
86
00:03:51,567 --> 00:03:53,833
is bankruptured stock.
87
00:03:53,933 --> 00:03:57,767
Rupted, it's not going, Ali.
88
00:03:57,867 --> 00:04:00,333
Uh, perhaps it
needs a wind up?
89
00:04:00,433 --> 00:04:01,833
Well, there's
nothing to wind up.
90
00:04:01,933 --> 00:04:02,767
Look.
91
00:04:02,867 --> 00:04:04,700
It's empty.
92
00:04:04,800 --> 00:04:06,967
Oh, blimey, I
am being cheated.
93
00:04:07,067 --> 00:04:07,967
Excuse me, please.
94
00:04:08,067 --> 00:04:09,133
I go to find the crooked man.
95
00:04:09,233 --> 00:04:10,600
He won't be there now, Ali.
96
00:04:10,700 --> 00:04:12,033
And what about my money?
97
00:04:12,133 --> 00:04:13,333
Well, you'll just have to
put it down to experience.
98
00:04:13,433 --> 00:04:15,200
Now sit down.
We've got a lot of work to do.
99
00:04:18,133 --> 00:04:19,000
How are you coming along?
100
00:04:21,233 --> 00:04:22,467
Have you learned
any more English?
101
00:04:23,933 --> 00:04:25,700
More English?
102
00:04:29,433 --> 00:04:32,600
Yes, uh, bloody foreigners.
103
00:04:35,833 --> 00:04:38,267
Yes, well, that's a start.
104
00:04:38,367 --> 00:04:42,100
You'll just have to follow the
lesson as best you can, yeah?
105
00:04:42,200 --> 00:04:43,900
And I'll explain later.
106
00:04:44,000 --> 00:04:46,467
Do you understand?
107
00:04:46,567 --> 00:04:47,233
Well, never mind.
108
00:04:47,333 --> 00:04:48,933
Sit down and do your best.
109
00:04:49,033 --> 00:04:50,600
Right, now tonight,
we're going to look
110
00:04:50,700 --> 00:04:52,167
at sentence construction.
111
00:04:52,267 --> 00:04:55,000
Now can anybody give me a
definition of a sentence,
112
00:04:55,100 --> 00:04:56,767
please?
- Me, please.
113
00:04:56,867 --> 00:04:58,333
Yes, Su Lee.
114
00:04:58,433 --> 00:05:01,567
A sentence is a group of words
that makes complete sentence.
115
00:05:01,667 --> 00:05:02,767
Very good.
116
00:05:02,867 --> 00:05:05,033
For example, communism
if only true way of life.
117
00:05:05,133 --> 00:05:06,433
Thank you.
118
00:05:06,533 --> 00:05:08,267
Or capitalists are enemies
of peace-loving people.
119
00:05:08,367 --> 00:05:09,567
Or China will one
day rule the world.
120
00:05:09,667 --> 00:05:11,333
Yeah, I think you've
made your point, Su Lee.
121
00:05:11,433 --> 00:05:12,600
Good, thank you.
122
00:05:12,700 --> 00:05:14,967
Right, now a sentence contains
eight parts of speech.
123
00:05:15,067 --> 00:05:16,133
Can anybody tell
me what they are?
124
00:05:16,233 --> 00:05:17,800
Come along.
- Nouns.
125
00:05:17,900 --> 00:05:18,867
Good, excellent.
126
00:05:18,967 --> 00:05:20,467
- Pronouns.
- Very good.
127
00:05:20,567 --> 00:05:21,567
Hey.
128
00:05:21,667 --> 00:05:23,833
Why am I very good,
and she is excellente?
129
00:05:23,933 --> 00:05:26,100
Well, all right,
you're both excellent.
130
00:05:26,200 --> 00:05:27,033
Fine, anybody else?
131
00:05:27,133 --> 00:05:28,733
- A verb.
- Good.
132
00:05:28,833 --> 00:05:30,000
- Adverb.
- Well done.
133
00:05:30,100 --> 00:05:30,967
Adjective.
134
00:05:31,067 --> 00:05:31,900
Yes?
135
00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:33,200
Prepositiono.
136
00:05:33,300 --> 00:05:35,133
Goodo, uh, good, yeah.
137
00:05:35,233 --> 00:05:36,133
Conjunction.
138
00:05:36,233 --> 00:05:37,467
Well done, and one more.
139
00:05:37,567 --> 00:05:38,567
Come on.
140
00:05:38,667 --> 00:05:40,133
Doesn't anyone know
what the other one is?
141
00:05:40,233 --> 00:05:42,667
An interjection,
can anybody tell me
142
00:05:42,767 --> 00:05:43,633
what an interjection is?
143
00:05:43,733 --> 00:05:44,933
Si, senor.
144
00:05:45,033 --> 00:05:45,867
Yes, Juan?
145
00:05:45,967 --> 00:05:46,767
Needle.
146
00:05:50,867 --> 00:05:52,733
Si, like, uh, doctor.
147
00:05:52,833 --> 00:05:53,667
Bang.
148
00:05:56,200 --> 00:05:57,833
Interjection.
149
00:05:57,933 --> 00:06:00,067
No, Juan, that's an injection.
150
00:06:00,167 --> 00:06:01,367
Ah, it's all right.
151
00:06:01,467 --> 00:06:04,333
An interjection is a
word put into a sentence
152
00:06:04,433 --> 00:06:06,767
to express some emotion,
such as oh, ah, or hush.
153
00:06:06,867 --> 00:06:10,400
Right, we will now construct a
sentence starting with a noun.
154
00:06:10,500 --> 00:06:12,900
Ranjeet, can you give
us a noun, please?
155
00:06:13,000 --> 00:06:15,967
- Idiot.
- Idiot?
156
00:06:16,067 --> 00:06:17,667
Surely, you could have
thought of something else.
157
00:06:17,767 --> 00:06:20,133
I could have said Muslim.
158
00:06:20,233 --> 00:06:22,633
Don't you be insulting
me, you..
159
00:06:22,733 --> 00:06:23,867
All right, that'll do.
160
00:06:23,967 --> 00:06:25,500
Ranjeet, you are here
to learn English.
161
00:06:25,600 --> 00:06:28,100
Now kindly keep your personal
prejudices to yourself.
162
00:06:28,200 --> 00:06:29,333
A thousand apologies.
163
00:06:29,433 --> 00:06:31,533
All right, now give
me a noun, please.
164
00:06:31,633 --> 00:06:32,467
A waiter.
165
00:06:32,567 --> 00:06:34,967
A waiter, good.
166
00:06:35,067 --> 00:06:37,900
Now, Max, an adjective.
167
00:06:38,000 --> 00:06:39,367
Come along.
168
00:06:39,467 --> 00:06:40,200
Look.
169
00:06:40,300 --> 00:06:42,400
Ranjeet gave us a noun, waiter.
170
00:06:42,500 --> 00:06:43,233
You describe him.
171
00:06:43,333 --> 00:06:45,567
Is he old, tall, short, thin?
172
00:06:45,667 --> 00:06:46,567
Well, how do I know?
173
00:06:46,667 --> 00:06:47,467
I never met him.
174
00:06:50,133 --> 00:06:53,600
We're not talking about
an actual waiter, Max.
175
00:06:53,700 --> 00:06:57,100
Ah, he's a part-time waiter.
176
00:06:57,200 --> 00:06:59,433
We are trying to
construct a sentence.
177
00:06:59,533 --> 00:07:01,300
Ranjeet has given
us a noun, waiter.
178
00:07:01,400 --> 00:07:04,800
I want you to give me an
adjective that describes him.
179
00:07:04,900 --> 00:07:06,867
OK, a hold waiter.
180
00:07:06,967 --> 00:07:09,400
An old waiter.
181
00:07:09,500 --> 00:07:11,733
With a mustache.
182
00:07:11,833 --> 00:07:13,933
Just old will do.
183
00:07:14,033 --> 00:07:15,433
OK.
184
00:07:15,533 --> 00:07:19,267
Right, we'll put a definite
article in, the old waiter.
185
00:07:19,367 --> 00:07:21,367
Now we need a verb,
something he was doing.
186
00:07:21,467 --> 00:07:22,100
Danielle?
187
00:07:22,200 --> 00:07:24,567
Ooh, making love.
188
00:07:24,667 --> 00:07:26,767
Can't you think of--
think of something better
189
00:07:26,867 --> 00:07:28,200
that he could have been doing?
190
00:07:28,300 --> 00:07:31,533
But I can't see nothing
than better than making love.
191
00:07:31,633 --> 00:07:33,133
Yes, but something
more appropriate
192
00:07:33,233 --> 00:07:34,900
to a waiter in a restaurant.
193
00:07:35,000 --> 00:07:37,367
He served.
194
00:07:37,467 --> 00:07:42,933
Served, good, the
old waiter served.
195
00:07:43,033 --> 00:07:44,833
Now we need an adverb.
196
00:07:44,933 --> 00:07:45,733
Taro.
197
00:07:45,833 --> 00:07:48,533
Ah, so.
198
00:07:48,633 --> 00:07:52,767
Yeah, an adverb, please,
modifying the verb, served.
199
00:07:52,867 --> 00:07:54,133
Carefully-o.
200
00:07:54,233 --> 00:08:01,333
Carefully-o, uh, carefully,
he served carefully.
201
00:08:01,433 --> 00:08:04,233
Right, now can anybody
add anything to that?
202
00:08:06,600 --> 00:08:12,933
The old waiter carefully
served fish and chips.
203
00:08:13,033 --> 00:08:15,800
Two more nouns
and a conjunction.
204
00:08:15,900 --> 00:08:18,167
Okey cokey.
205
00:08:18,267 --> 00:08:21,867
The old waiter
carefully served two
206
00:08:21,967 --> 00:08:26,267
more nouns and a conjunction.
207
00:08:26,367 --> 00:08:29,067
You were right
first time, Giovanni.
208
00:08:29,167 --> 00:08:30,000
Mr. Brown.
209
00:08:30,100 --> 00:08:31,500
Yes, Sid, what is it?
210
00:08:31,600 --> 00:08:32,633
Uh, there-- there's a geezer
out here wants to see Ms.
211
00:08:32,733 --> 00:08:33,800
Courtney.
212
00:08:33,900 --> 00:08:34,900
Well, what's that
got to do with me?
213
00:08:35,000 --> 00:08:36,200
Well, I can't
find her anywhere.
214
00:08:36,300 --> 00:08:37,500
Will you come out and
have a word with him?
215
00:08:37,600 --> 00:08:38,767
Oh, yes, all right, now
I want you to complete
216
00:08:38,867 --> 00:08:40,000
the sentence using
an interjection,
217
00:08:40,100 --> 00:08:41,467
a preposition, and a pronoun.
218
00:08:41,567 --> 00:08:43,033
And I shall be back in
a minute, all right?
219
00:08:43,133 --> 00:08:44,133
All right.
220
00:08:47,833 --> 00:08:48,733
This is him.
221
00:08:52,200 --> 00:08:55,833
Are you Ms. Courtney?
222
00:08:55,933 --> 00:08:58,033
Do I look like Ms. Courtney?
223
00:08:58,133 --> 00:08:59,633
Well, I asked to
see Ms. Courtney.
224
00:08:59,733 --> 00:09:01,100
Ah, well, who are you?
225
00:09:01,200 --> 00:09:02,633
My name's Fo--
226
00:09:02,733 --> 00:09:03,600
Forbes Fortescue.
227
00:09:04,633 --> 00:09:05,567
Pardon?
228
00:09:05,667 --> 00:09:08,067
Fo-- Forbes Fortescue.
229
00:09:08,167 --> 00:09:09,600
Oh, Jeremy Bro--
230
00:09:09,700 --> 00:09:12,367
Bro-- Brown.
231
00:09:12,467 --> 00:09:14,200
I am an ATC.
232
00:09:14,300 --> 00:09:15,267
I am a BA, Oxford.
233
00:09:17,867 --> 00:09:18,933
My card.
234
00:09:19,033 --> 00:09:20,233
Ah.
235
00:09:20,333 --> 00:09:21,667
Oh, you are an ATC, an
Assistant Town Clerk.
236
00:09:21,767 --> 00:09:23,400
- Quite so.
- Ah, I see.
237
00:09:23,500 --> 00:09:24,700
Ah, Ms. Courtney.
238
00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:27,067
Mr. Brown, is this another
of your foreign students?
239
00:09:27,167 --> 00:09:28,467
No, he's an ATC.
240
00:09:28,567 --> 00:09:31,367
I don't care what
nationality he is.
241
00:09:31,467 --> 00:09:33,567
It's time you were
in the classroom.
242
00:09:33,667 --> 00:09:34,967
Madam, my name is Fo--
243
00:09:35,067 --> 00:09:37,933
Forbes Fortescue.
244
00:09:38,033 --> 00:09:39,400
He's hyphenated.
245
00:09:39,500 --> 00:09:41,900
How unfortunate.
246
00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:43,400
I am here from the town hall.
247
00:09:43,500 --> 00:09:45,800
We have some news
from the palace.
248
00:09:45,900 --> 00:09:48,600
Victoria or Crystal?
249
00:09:48,700 --> 00:09:51,967
Buckingham, I'm here in
connection with the, uh,
250
00:09:52,067 --> 00:09:54,400
ro-- ro-- royal visit to
the borough next week.
251
00:09:54,500 --> 00:09:57,300
And as the duke himself
laid the foundation stone
252
00:09:57,400 --> 00:09:59,033
of this building, it
has been suggested
253
00:09:59,133 --> 00:10:01,233
that Her Majesty and
His Royal Highness
254
00:10:01,333 --> 00:10:03,233
pay a brief, informal
visit to the school.
255
00:10:03,333 --> 00:10:05,467
The queen and Prince
Phillip coming here?
256
00:10:05,567 --> 00:10:06,300
Next Tuesday.
257
00:10:06,400 --> 00:10:07,433
Did you here that, Mr. Brown?
258
00:10:07,533 --> 00:10:09,267
They're coming here,
the two of them,
259
00:10:09,367 --> 00:10:11,767
together, in person, here, him
and her, together, in person.
260
00:10:11,867 --> 00:10:14,167
Well, calm down, Ms. Courtney.
Don't overexcite yourself.
261
00:10:14,267 --> 00:10:15,667
Oh, who's getting overexcited?
262
00:10:15,767 --> 00:10:17,967
I'm-- I mean, I'm perfectly
calm about the whole thing.
263
00:10:19,733 --> 00:10:20,533
Oh.
264
00:10:33,800 --> 00:10:36,433
I have seen some strange
things on toilet doors--
265
00:10:36,533 --> 00:10:40,067
bucks and does, um, uh, lads and
lasses, setters and pointers.
266
00:10:40,167 --> 00:10:42,100
But I have never seen
dukes and queens.
267
00:10:42,200 --> 00:10:43,833
Oh, it's not for them to use.
268
00:10:43,933 --> 00:10:44,967
Well, what's it for?
269
00:10:45,067 --> 00:10:46,967
Well, it's Ms.
Courtney's idea.
270
00:10:47,067 --> 00:10:48,533
You see, she didn't
want to offend
271
00:10:48,633 --> 00:10:52,133
the royal family by letting
them see toilet doors.
272
00:10:52,233 --> 00:10:53,167
So I've done the best thing.
273
00:10:53,267 --> 00:10:54,133
I've discovered them.
274
00:10:54,233 --> 00:10:55,633
Oh, well, very diplomatic.
275
00:10:55,733 --> 00:10:58,467
Mind you, what a waste of
time it is, though, Mr. Brown.
276
00:10:58,567 --> 00:11:00,733
They must have loos
in Buckingham Palace.
277
00:11:00,833 --> 00:11:03,667
Well, absolutely, is
the old battleaxe in yet?
278
00:11:03,767 --> 00:11:06,833
The old battleaxe is here.
279
00:11:06,933 --> 00:11:08,567
Well, I wasn't meaning
you, Ms. Courtney.
280
00:11:08,667 --> 00:11:11,067
Well, I trust you were not
referring to Her Majesty.
281
00:11:11,167 --> 00:11:12,600
Oh, no, no, no,
I was referring
282
00:11:12,700 --> 00:11:13,667
to Gladys, the tea lady.
283
00:11:13,767 --> 00:11:16,400
Oh, here.
284
00:11:16,500 --> 00:11:17,600
What's this for?
285
00:11:17,700 --> 00:11:20,600
Well, it is not for
sticking in your buttonhole.
286
00:11:20,700 --> 00:11:25,133
It is to wave at the
royal personages.
287
00:11:25,233 --> 00:11:26,900
Are you going to change?
288
00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:28,133
Into what?
289
00:11:28,233 --> 00:11:30,000
Well, you surely
don't intend to greet
290
00:11:30,100 --> 00:11:32,633
our distinguished
guests in that jacket.
291
00:11:32,733 --> 00:11:34,133
Haven't you anything
a little more formal?
292
00:11:34,233 --> 00:11:36,767
I've got a black tie
I wear for funerals.
293
00:11:36,867 --> 00:11:39,700
Here.
294
00:11:39,800 --> 00:11:41,100
Well, that's better.
295
00:11:41,200 --> 00:11:43,767
I feel as if I'm
going to a cup final.
296
00:11:43,867 --> 00:11:44,700
Sidney?
297
00:11:44,800 --> 00:11:45,700
Hmm?
298
00:11:45,800 --> 00:11:46,933
Go and sweep the schoolyard.
299
00:11:47,033 --> 00:11:48,800
I swept it up once.
300
00:11:48,900 --> 00:11:50,567
Well, sweep it again.
301
00:11:50,667 --> 00:11:52,600
You wouldn't like me to go
down on me hands and knees
302
00:11:52,700 --> 00:11:54,100
and scrub it, would you?
303
00:11:54,200 --> 00:11:56,133
Don't be ridiculous.
304
00:11:56,233 --> 00:11:57,567
It wouldn't dry
before they arrive.
305
00:12:02,367 --> 00:12:05,033
I think I'll go and
polish the silver.
306
00:12:05,133 --> 00:12:06,333
What silver?
307
00:12:06,433 --> 00:12:08,133
Well, I brought my
silver tea set, in case
308
00:12:08,233 --> 00:12:09,500
they wanted a drink.
309
00:12:09,600 --> 00:12:11,233
Oh, perhaps the duke
would prefer a tot of rum,
310
00:12:11,333 --> 00:12:12,533
being an ex-naval man.
311
00:12:13,600 --> 00:12:15,133
Oh, dear, I hadn't
thought of that.
312
00:12:15,233 --> 00:12:17,300
Oh, well, he'll just have
to make do with sherry.
313
00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:19,233
Shall I ask Gladys to make
up a couple of ham rolls,
314
00:12:19,333 --> 00:12:20,467
in case they feel a bit peckish?
315
00:12:20,567 --> 00:12:23,333
Ham rolls?
316
00:12:23,433 --> 00:12:27,667
You can't give
royalty ham rolls.
317
00:12:27,767 --> 00:12:29,167
This is a very special occasion.
318
00:12:29,267 --> 00:12:32,767
Tell her to open
a tin of salmon.
319
00:12:32,867 --> 00:12:34,267
They won't want
anything to eat.
320
00:12:34,367 --> 00:12:36,733
It is better to be prepared.
321
00:12:36,833 --> 00:12:40,933
Oh, I wonder if we should
have got a red carpet.
322
00:12:41,033 --> 00:12:42,133
Look.
323
00:12:42,233 --> 00:12:43,667
Why don't you go the
whole hog and ask
324
00:12:43,767 --> 00:12:45,200
the music class to play the
national anthem as they enter?
325
00:12:45,300 --> 00:12:47,333
This is supposed to
be an informal visit.
326
00:12:47,433 --> 00:12:48,633
I don't think
you are approaching
327
00:12:48,733 --> 00:12:50,200
this special occasion
in the right attitude.
328
00:12:50,300 --> 00:12:51,767
Well, I think you're
being carried away.
329
00:12:51,867 --> 00:12:55,733
Nonsense, this is an
opportunity for all the staff
330
00:12:55,833 --> 00:12:57,100
and students to
show their loyalty
331
00:12:57,200 --> 00:12:59,167
and devotion to our sovereigns.
332
00:12:59,267 --> 00:13:02,067
It's up to the entire school
to make a good impression.
333
00:13:02,167 --> 00:13:04,133
One never knows
where it may lead.
334
00:13:04,233 --> 00:13:06,500
The new year's honors
list isn't far away.
335
00:13:06,600 --> 00:13:07,633
Honors list?
336
00:13:07,733 --> 00:13:10,700
Yes, a knighthood could
be within your grasp.
337
00:13:10,800 --> 00:13:11,700
A knighthood?
338
00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:25,467
Mr. Jeremy Brown.
339
00:13:34,300 --> 00:13:36,133
Arise, Sir Jeremy.
340
00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:43,800
Mr. Brown?
341
00:13:43,900 --> 00:13:44,933
Yes, your majesty?
342
00:13:45,033 --> 00:13:46,067
I beg your pardon.
343
00:13:46,167 --> 00:13:47,233
Oh, I thought
you were the queen.
344
00:13:47,333 --> 00:13:48,167
Have you been drinking?
345
00:13:48,267 --> 00:13:49,600
No, just daydreaming.
346
00:13:49,700 --> 00:13:51,033
Well, you had better wake up.
347
00:13:51,133 --> 00:13:52,767
They are due to arrive
in half an hour.
348
00:13:52,867 --> 00:13:54,000
Now where are your students?
349
00:13:54,100 --> 00:13:55,267
Uh, they're in the
cloakroom, changing.
350
00:13:55,367 --> 00:13:56,533
Changing?
351
00:13:56,633 --> 00:13:59,767
Yes, they insisted on wearing
their national costumes.
352
00:13:59,867 --> 00:14:01,033
Gladys?
353
00:14:01,133 --> 00:14:02,600
Gladys, are you there?
354
00:14:02,700 --> 00:14:03,533
What?
355
00:14:06,267 --> 00:14:09,200
Oh, blimey, rule Britannia.
356
00:14:09,300 --> 00:14:10,467
What, don't you like it?
357
00:14:10,567 --> 00:14:11,467
Do what?
358
00:14:11,567 --> 00:14:12,900
Don't you like it?
359
00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:15,267
Very patriotic, I don't
know whether to salute
360
00:14:15,367 --> 00:14:18,700
you or run you up the flagpole.
361
00:14:18,800 --> 00:14:20,567
I've got a surprise for you.
362
00:14:20,667 --> 00:14:21,733
Yeah?
363
00:14:21,833 --> 00:14:22,667
Look.
364
00:14:22,767 --> 00:14:25,600
Oh, God, no.
365
00:14:25,700 --> 00:14:27,133
That will surprise the duke.
366
00:14:27,233 --> 00:14:28,033
Surprise him?
367
00:14:28,133 --> 00:14:29,833
It'll paralyze him.
368
00:14:29,933 --> 00:14:33,533
You're supposed to curtsy,
not flash him your underwear.
369
00:14:33,633 --> 00:14:34,733
Any of my stu--
370
00:14:34,833 --> 00:14:35,633
good heavens.
371
00:14:35,733 --> 00:14:37,300
Oh, don't speak to her.
372
00:14:37,400 --> 00:14:40,333
She'll flash you her knickers.
373
00:14:40,433 --> 00:14:42,700
Here, they will come
up here, won't they?
374
00:14:42,800 --> 00:14:44,400
Oh, yes, I expect so, Gladys.
375
00:14:44,500 --> 00:14:45,533
Oh, I do hope so.
376
00:14:45,633 --> 00:14:48,367
I think Prince Philip's
lovely, and I've
377
00:14:48,467 --> 00:14:50,133
always been fond of sailors.
378
00:14:50,233 --> 00:14:51,700
Hey, don't forget.
379
00:14:51,800 --> 00:14:53,133
He belongs to the queen.
380
00:14:53,233 --> 00:14:55,100
Yeah, have you seen
any of my students?
381
00:14:55,200 --> 00:14:56,600
They're still changing.
382
00:14:56,700 --> 00:14:58,067
Ah, well, go and tell them
to hurry up, Sid, will you?
383
00:14:58,167 --> 00:14:59,333
All right, yeah, I'll go.
384
00:14:59,433 --> 00:15:01,400
Yeah, and I'd better
get tidied up, too.
385
00:15:01,500 --> 00:15:05,133
The duke might want to
inspect the utensils.
386
00:15:05,233 --> 00:15:06,433
I think this
looks better on you.
387
00:15:10,533 --> 00:15:13,533
All ready for your
inspection, sir.
388
00:15:13,633 --> 00:15:14,967
Carry on, Sid.
389
00:15:15,067 --> 00:15:16,067
Ms. China.
390
00:15:21,133 --> 00:15:23,233
Is that your national costume?
391
00:15:23,333 --> 00:15:25,800
This is uniform of
People's Army of Liberation,
392
00:15:25,900 --> 00:15:27,600
as prescribed by Chairman Mao.
393
00:15:27,700 --> 00:15:28,800
Do you not like it?
394
00:15:28,900 --> 00:15:30,300
Well, I think it
lacks a certain, uh,
395
00:15:30,400 --> 00:15:34,067
finish, a belt of ammunition,
a couple of hand grenades.
396
00:15:34,167 --> 00:15:37,067
Ms. India.
397
00:15:37,167 --> 00:15:40,100
Oh, very nice, Jamila.
398
00:15:40,200 --> 00:15:41,267
It is Jamila, isn't it?
399
00:15:42,300 --> 00:15:43,500
Yes.
400
00:15:43,600 --> 00:15:44,433
Ms. Germany.
401
00:15:46,967 --> 00:15:48,900
- What you think?
- Very Teutonic.
402
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:50,300
Danke.
403
00:15:50,400 --> 00:15:51,200
Ms. Sweden.
404
00:15:57,733 --> 00:15:58,967
Beautiful, yes?
405
00:15:59,067 --> 00:16:00,467
Beautiful, very.
406
00:16:00,567 --> 00:16:01,467
And the clothes, too?
407
00:16:01,567 --> 00:16:02,833
Well, I was referring
to the clothes.
408
00:16:02,933 --> 00:16:03,733
Ms. France.
409
00:16:08,867 --> 00:16:09,700
What do you think?
410
00:16:18,600 --> 00:16:19,400
Ms. Greece.
411
00:16:32,933 --> 00:16:34,267
Well, don't take the Mick.
412
00:16:34,367 --> 00:16:37,100
Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Greece.
413
00:16:40,900 --> 00:16:43,167
Are you comfortable
in that, Max?
414
00:16:43,267 --> 00:16:46,267
It's a bit cold, boss.
415
00:16:46,367 --> 00:16:47,400
Mr. Pakistani.
416
00:16:50,867 --> 00:16:53,200
God bless Queen
Elizabeth, and not
417
00:16:53,300 --> 00:16:56,700
forgetting the Duke of Edinbug.
418
00:16:56,800 --> 00:16:58,567
Duke of Edinburgh.
419
00:16:58,667 --> 00:16:59,533
Him also.
420
00:16:59,633 --> 00:17:00,433
Mr. Italy.
421
00:17:12,133 --> 00:17:14,567
Are you representing
Italy or the Mafia?
422
00:17:23,933 --> 00:17:25,400
I represent Sicily.
423
00:17:28,767 --> 00:17:29,633
Mr. Punjab.
424
00:17:32,500 --> 00:17:35,067
Oh, most endearing, Ranjeet.
425
00:17:35,167 --> 00:17:37,000
Thank you very much.
426
00:17:37,100 --> 00:17:37,967
Mr. Hungary.
427
00:17:42,333 --> 00:17:44,767
Very good, Zoltan.
428
00:17:44,867 --> 00:17:45,767
Thank you.
429
00:17:45,867 --> 00:17:46,667
Mr. Japan.
430
00:17:50,767 --> 00:17:51,833
Nanki-Poo, I presume?
431
00:17:51,933 --> 00:17:53,667
Ah, so.
432
00:17:53,767 --> 00:17:57,900
And last but
not least, Mr. Spain.
433
00:17:58,000 --> 00:17:58,800
Ole.
434
00:18:06,300 --> 00:18:09,633
Ah, Professori, there's
still nobody coming.
435
00:18:09,733 --> 00:18:10,567
Well, any minute now.
436
00:18:10,667 --> 00:18:11,300
Come on.
437
00:18:11,400 --> 00:18:12,733
In your places, everyone.
438
00:18:12,833 --> 00:18:14,000
Um, where's Zoltan?
439
00:18:14,100 --> 00:18:16,600
Ah, he's gone to try
and find the toilet.
440
00:18:16,700 --> 00:18:18,700
Ah, well, that may
take him a while.
441
00:18:21,733 --> 00:18:25,033
And I'd like to stress that
this visit is informal,
442
00:18:25,133 --> 00:18:26,700
so that Her Majesty
may not necessarily
443
00:18:26,800 --> 00:18:27,867
come into this classroom.
444
00:18:29,500 --> 00:18:31,300
Yeah, well, you mustn't be
too disappointed if she doesn't.
445
00:18:31,400 --> 00:18:33,233
But if she does, I
want you all to behave
446
00:18:33,333 --> 00:18:34,633
just as if she weren't here.
447
00:18:34,733 --> 00:18:38,000
Understand?
448
00:18:38,100 --> 00:18:39,367
In view of the
occasion, it would
449
00:18:39,467 --> 00:18:40,700
seem appropriate to
tell you a little
450
00:18:40,800 --> 00:18:43,433
of the history of our
British kings and queens.
451
00:18:43,533 --> 00:18:46,267
Now it all started with
the Norman conquest.
452
00:18:46,367 --> 00:18:48,000
I have seen that
on the telewision,
453
00:18:48,100 --> 00:18:49,633
wery funny English play.
454
00:18:49,733 --> 00:18:52,967
Yes, I am referring to the
actual invasion of England
455
00:18:53,067 --> 00:18:54,500
by William of Normandy.
456
00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:55,633
It was 1066.
457
00:18:55,733 --> 00:18:56,900
Wrong.
458
00:18:57,000 --> 00:19:00,100
I beg your pardon?
459
00:19:00,200 --> 00:19:09,133
Ten sickity-six,
maybe, uh, 1056.
460
00:19:09,233 --> 00:19:11,500
It was 1066.
461
00:19:11,600 --> 00:19:17,100
No, cannot be, ten
sickity-six, 60 minute, 1 hour.
462
00:19:19,900 --> 00:19:24,133
Ten sickity-six,
6 minute past 11.
463
00:19:27,933 --> 00:19:30,167
1066 was the year.
464
00:19:30,267 --> 00:19:31,400
It's all right.
465
00:19:32,067 --> 00:19:32,400
Right.
466
00:19:36,067 --> 00:19:38,033
Now William of
Normandy, by the way,
467
00:19:38,133 --> 00:19:40,433
does anybody know what
other name he was known by,
468
00:19:40,533 --> 00:19:41,633
William the?
469
00:19:41,733 --> 00:19:42,533
Corn curer.
470
00:19:45,467 --> 00:19:46,833
Conqueror.
471
00:19:46,933 --> 00:19:48,533
OK.
472
00:19:48,633 --> 00:19:50,733
Now he was succeeded
by his third son,
473
00:19:50,833 --> 00:19:53,233
William Rufus, the Red King.
474
00:19:53,333 --> 00:19:57,467
Oh, blimey, you are
having a communist king?
475
00:19:57,567 --> 00:20:01,700
No, no, he was called the Red
King because of his red hair.
476
00:20:01,800 --> 00:20:03,367
Jolly good.
477
00:20:03,467 --> 00:20:06,333
Now William Rufus died
in 1100 after being struck
478
00:20:06,433 --> 00:20:08,133
by an arrow in the woods.
479
00:20:08,233 --> 00:20:11,333
Hey, maybe it
was Robin the Hood.
480
00:20:14,867 --> 00:20:17,700
No, Robin the Hood wasn't--
481
00:20:17,800 --> 00:20:19,700
Robin Hood wasn't born then.
482
00:20:19,800 --> 00:20:21,267
He was in the Middle Ages.
483
00:20:21,367 --> 00:20:26,533
How can he be middle aged
if he's not yet been born?
484
00:20:26,633 --> 00:20:28,833
Never mind about
Robin Hood, all right?
485
00:20:28,933 --> 00:20:31,867
Oh, yes, very colorful.
486
00:20:31,967 --> 00:20:33,567
Sorry to interrupt,
Mr. Brown, but they
487
00:20:33,667 --> 00:20:34,933
will be here any moment now.
488
00:20:35,033 --> 00:20:36,733
And I thought it would be rather
nice if one of your students
489
00:20:36,833 --> 00:20:38,333
were to present
this to Her Majesty.
490
00:20:38,433 --> 00:20:39,967
Hmm.
491
00:20:40,067 --> 00:20:41,800
I'll do that.
492
00:20:41,900 --> 00:20:45,033
It is usual for a bouquet
to be presented by a lady.
493
00:20:45,133 --> 00:20:49,267
With that skirt, who's
a-gonna know the difference?
494
00:20:49,367 --> 00:20:50,667
Come outside,
and I'll show you.
495
00:20:50,767 --> 00:20:51,700
Yeah, all right, that will do.
496
00:20:51,800 --> 00:20:52,967
Sit down.
497
00:20:53,067 --> 00:20:55,600
Now, uh, who do you
suggest, Ms. Courtney?
498
00:20:55,700 --> 00:20:56,900
Well, how about Jamila?
499
00:20:57,000 --> 00:20:58,033
Yes.
500
00:20:58,133 --> 00:21:00,867
Jamila, dear,
will you come here?
501
00:21:00,967 --> 00:21:05,867
And for goodness' sake, girl,
get rid of that knitting.
502
00:21:05,967 --> 00:21:09,033
Now then, Jamilla, I want you
to wait with me in the hall
503
00:21:09,133 --> 00:21:10,700
until their majesties
arrive, and then you
504
00:21:10,800 --> 00:21:12,100
can present this to the queen.
505
00:21:12,200 --> 00:21:14,167
You curtsy first, and
then you give it to her.
506
00:21:14,267 --> 00:21:16,033
Now let's try that.
507
00:21:16,133 --> 00:21:17,533
I am the queen.
508
00:21:19,733 --> 00:21:21,300
You are queen, Courtney?
509
00:21:21,400 --> 00:21:22,500
No, no, no, Jamila, come on.
510
00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:23,967
She's just pretending.
511
00:21:24,067 --> 00:21:26,533
Oh, ah, I am understand.
512
00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:34,833
Here you are, Quenie.
513
00:21:34,933 --> 00:21:37,133
You do not speak
until you are spoken to,
514
00:21:37,233 --> 00:21:38,700
and then you address
her as ma'am.
515
00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:39,633
Now let's try again.
516
00:21:43,133 --> 00:21:44,167
Ah, there you are.
517
00:21:44,267 --> 00:21:46,200
Ah, ah, uh,
Superintendent, how soon
518
00:21:46,300 --> 00:21:47,867
will the royal couple be here?
519
00:21:47,967 --> 00:21:48,800
They are not coming.
520
00:21:48,900 --> 00:21:50,133
What?
521
00:21:50,233 --> 00:21:51,733
We've had to
rearrange her schedule.
522
00:21:51,833 --> 00:21:53,300
Oh.
523
00:21:53,400 --> 00:21:54,633
They are going straight from
the hospital to the town hall.
524
00:21:54,733 --> 00:21:56,200
We're cutting out the
visit to the school.
525
00:21:56,300 --> 00:21:57,800
Well, I'd better go
and tell Ms. Courtney.
526
00:21:57,900 --> 00:21:58,700
There isn't time.
527
00:21:58,800 --> 00:21:59,800
You must come with me now.
528
00:21:59,900 --> 00:22:00,700
You men, follow me.
529
00:22:05,900 --> 00:22:07,867
Excuse me.
530
00:22:07,967 --> 00:22:09,500
Please?
531
00:22:09,600 --> 00:22:11,433
My name is Mrs. Baxter.
532
00:22:12,567 --> 00:22:16,200
My name is Mrs. Baxter.
533
00:22:16,300 --> 00:22:21,633
And my husband has just
joined your woodwork class.
534
00:22:21,733 --> 00:22:24,700
Do you think I could
have a word with him?
535
00:22:24,800 --> 00:22:28,067
Uh, uh, hey, Sid.
536
00:22:28,167 --> 00:22:29,000
No, you can't!
537
00:22:29,100 --> 00:22:29,900
Sid, Sid--
538
00:22:30,000 --> 00:22:30,900
No-- God, blimey.
539
00:22:31,000 --> 00:22:32,000
It's her.
540
00:22:38,200 --> 00:22:39,233
Hang on.
Hang on.
541
00:22:39,333 --> 00:22:39,967
Hang on.
542
00:22:40,067 --> 00:22:41,967
Don't go away.
543
00:22:42,067 --> 00:22:43,133
Try it again, and this time--
544
00:22:43,233 --> 00:22:45,000
Ms. Courtney, Mr.
Brown, she's here.
545
00:22:45,100 --> 00:22:46,033
She's arrived.
546
00:22:46,133 --> 00:22:47,700
She's outside.
- She can't be.
547
00:22:47,800 --> 00:22:49,433
She must have come in
by the back entrance.
548
00:22:49,533 --> 00:22:52,333
Well, don't leave her standing
outside, Sidney, Show her in.
549
00:22:52,433 --> 00:22:53,267
Yes.
550
00:23:04,333 --> 00:23:07,033
So pleased to meet you, ma'am.
551
00:23:07,133 --> 00:23:09,833
Uh, where is your husband?
552
00:23:09,933 --> 00:23:13,433
He's in the woodwork class.
553
00:23:13,533 --> 00:23:16,500
Well, I do hope we
shall have the pleasure
554
00:23:16,600 --> 00:23:18,533
of meeting him later on.
555
00:23:18,633 --> 00:23:22,533
This is Mr. Brown,
our English teacher.
556
00:23:22,633 --> 00:23:23,533
How do you do?
557
00:23:23,633 --> 00:23:24,433
Ma'am.
558
00:23:25,867 --> 00:23:26,700
Jamila.
559
00:23:34,700 --> 00:23:37,000
Mm, ma'am.
560
00:23:37,100 --> 00:23:38,133
Oh, how kind.
561
00:23:57,267 --> 00:24:00,067
And in this class, we
are endeavoring to teach
562
00:24:00,167 --> 00:24:03,000
English to foreign students.
563
00:24:03,100 --> 00:24:04,033
Excuse me, Ms. Courtney.
564
00:24:04,133 --> 00:24:05,300
Don't interrupt, Mr. Brown.
565
00:24:05,400 --> 00:24:06,000
Yeah, well, I think
you should know that--
566
00:24:06,100 --> 00:24:06,967
Mr. Brown.
567
00:24:07,067 --> 00:24:08,033
All right, please yourself.
568
00:24:08,133 --> 00:24:09,967
Would you care
for a cup of tea?
569
00:24:10,067 --> 00:24:11,300
If it's not too much trouble.
570
00:24:11,400 --> 00:24:13,833
Oh, it's no trouble at all.
571
00:24:13,933 --> 00:24:17,767
You must come round and have
a cup of tea with my husband
572
00:24:17,867 --> 00:24:19,000
and I sometime.
38971
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