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1
00:00:00,430 --> 00:00:02,590
All right, we'll see that you do. Get
back to me.
2
00:00:04,930 --> 00:00:05,930
Yeah, Bill.
3
00:00:06,710 --> 00:00:11,110
Oh, Bill, come on now, goddammit. I want
that stuff on my desk tomorrow. Now, a
4
00:00:11,110 --> 00:00:12,190
deadline is a fucking deadline.
5
00:00:12,930 --> 00:00:14,130
Tomorrow, Bill. Tomorrow!
6
00:00:18,670 --> 00:00:19,670
Yeah,
7
00:00:25,370 --> 00:00:26,370
what is it?
8
00:00:27,510 --> 00:00:28,830
Didn't I say 11 o 'clock?
9
00:00:31,020 --> 00:00:32,020
All right, send her in.
10
00:00:38,140 --> 00:00:39,640
You did say 10 o 'clock.
11
00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:43,320
Well, I must have. You're here, aren't
you?
12
00:00:43,840 --> 00:00:44,840
Won't you have a seat?
13
00:00:45,120 --> 00:00:46,120
Thank you.
14
00:00:48,200 --> 00:00:49,940
So, any trouble finding the place?
15
00:00:50,280 --> 00:00:54,360
Oh, no, not at all. I've lived in this
fair city far too long to get lost.
16
00:00:54,720 --> 00:00:58,220
I see by your resume here that you have
some writing experience.
17
00:00:58,960 --> 00:01:00,380
Are you aware of what this job entails?
18
00:01:00,940 --> 00:01:05,420
It's the new Dear Candy column, isn't
it? I gather that it entails answering
19
00:01:05,420 --> 00:01:07,700
letters to that column, much like Dear
Abby.
20
00:01:08,560 --> 00:01:11,880
Yeah, Dear Abby. Well, I'm afraid she'd
probably line her birdcage with the
21
00:01:11,880 --> 00:01:12,920
letters that we get here.
22
00:01:13,700 --> 00:01:14,720
They're pretty graphic.
23
00:01:14,940 --> 00:01:16,240
Sex problems, mostly.
24
00:01:16,720 --> 00:01:17,980
Conventional and unconventional.
25
00:01:18,720 --> 00:01:22,880
Now, all you have to do is read them
over and make a sympathetic response.
26
00:01:23,820 --> 00:01:25,620
Now, the girls we've had here before...
27
00:01:26,650 --> 00:01:31,690
Their responses were either too cynical,
too sarcastic, or just plain too
28
00:01:31,690 --> 00:01:35,850
cutesy. Now, do you think that you can
strike a happy medium, Miss Monet?
29
00:01:36,250 --> 00:01:38,690
Where's my office and where's my pen,
Mr. Taylor?
30
00:01:41,110 --> 00:01:42,110
Here we are.
31
00:01:42,330 --> 00:01:43,690
Welcome to your new job.
32
00:01:44,050 --> 00:01:46,250
A year of cleaning and you'll be ready
to start.
33
00:01:46,690 --> 00:01:48,950
Oh, it's not that bad. I've seen worse.
34
00:01:49,350 --> 00:01:50,450
What, were you in the Army?
35
00:01:50,790 --> 00:01:52,110
Mr. Taylor, New York is on too.
36
00:01:52,450 --> 00:01:53,369
Oh, great.
37
00:01:53,370 --> 00:01:55,030
Oh, go ahead. I'll be fine. You sure?
38
00:01:55,390 --> 00:01:56,390
Mm -hmm.
39
00:01:56,520 --> 00:02:00,360
I bet you'll have a couple letters read
and answered by 5 o 'clock. I bet you
40
00:02:00,360 --> 00:02:01,580
don't find the typewriter by then.
41
00:02:10,660 --> 00:02:11,060
Dear
42
00:02:11,060 --> 00:02:18,660
Candy,
43
00:02:18,880 --> 00:02:23,000
I'm a 20 -year -old male who has a real
tough time meeting girls.
44
00:02:23,820 --> 00:02:29,080
In a cocktail lounge or at a party or
anything like that, I'm very intimidated
45
00:02:29,080 --> 00:02:30,080
by them.
46
00:02:31,380 --> 00:02:36,080
I'm okay if they break the ice, but then
at the end of the conversation I never
47
00:02:36,080 --> 00:02:38,740
ask for their number or if I can see
them again.
48
00:02:39,520 --> 00:02:42,220
I guess it comes right down to fear of
rejection.
49
00:02:43,460 --> 00:02:47,820
Anyway, I'm writing to say that an ad in
your magazine changed all that.
50
00:02:48,320 --> 00:02:49,880
It was the ad about...
51
00:02:56,330 --> 00:02:57,330
Oh, hi, Mom.
52
00:02:59,750 --> 00:03:01,050
Oh, fine, fine.
53
00:03:01,390 --> 00:03:03,530
Everything's going... Huh?
54
00:03:04,870 --> 00:03:06,050
Oh, that's fine, too.
55
00:03:08,550 --> 00:03:09,550
Huh?
56
00:03:10,050 --> 00:03:11,690
Oh, you're coming home Wednesday.
57
00:03:12,570 --> 00:03:14,010
Okay, let me write that down.
58
00:03:18,130 --> 00:03:19,130
Okay.
59
00:03:20,110 --> 00:03:21,250
Okay, yeah, I got it.
60
00:03:24,610 --> 00:03:26,280
Okay. I'll see you then.
61
00:03:27,420 --> 00:03:28,420
Bye -bye.
62
00:03:55,980 --> 00:03:58,720
Tie me, spank me, take me over your
knee.
63
00:04:05,120 --> 00:04:07,740
Alicia, always ready to please.
64
00:04:35,010 --> 00:04:40,110
Alicia? Yes, um... I'm calling about the
ad.
65
00:04:41,050 --> 00:04:42,050
What's your name?
66
00:04:43,630 --> 00:04:44,770
Uh, Tim.
67
00:04:47,050 --> 00:04:48,550
Where do you live, Tim?
68
00:04:50,510 --> 00:04:51,510
My address?
69
00:04:53,390 --> 00:04:55,730
154 Circle Avenue.
70
00:04:57,010 --> 00:04:58,830
I'll see you in 20 minutes.
71
00:04:59,830 --> 00:05:01,170
Wait a minute, wait, uh...
72
00:05:32,320 --> 00:05:33,440
Hi. Hi.
73
00:05:34,820 --> 00:05:36,940
You're? Alicia. Alicia.
74
00:05:37,260 --> 00:05:38,260
Yeah, hi.
75
00:05:38,600 --> 00:05:39,900
Aren't you going to ask me in?
76
00:05:41,340 --> 00:05:42,800
Oh, yeah, sure.
77
00:05:43,140 --> 00:05:44,140
I want in.
78
00:06:01,320 --> 00:06:02,320
This is my room.
79
00:06:03,300 --> 00:06:04,300
It's nice.
80
00:06:06,980 --> 00:06:07,980
So are you.
81
00:06:12,560 --> 00:06:15,840
Tim, have you ever been with anyone like
me before?
82
00:06:17,620 --> 00:06:18,620
Not quite.
83
00:06:22,500 --> 00:06:23,760
What made you call me?
84
00:06:30,220 --> 00:06:31,220
Don't be nervous.
85
00:06:32,220 --> 00:06:33,600
I won't bite you.
86
00:06:35,620 --> 00:06:36,880
Unless you want me to.
87
00:06:41,220 --> 00:06:41,680
What
88
00:06:41,680 --> 00:06:48,660
were you
89
00:06:48,660 --> 00:06:50,000
doing tonight before I came over?
90
00:06:54,140 --> 00:06:55,540
Sam. Hello.
91
00:06:56,580 --> 00:06:58,640
Will you tell me if you dislike any of
it?
92
00:08:19,840 --> 00:08:20,980
Do you like what this is?
93
00:08:22,360 --> 00:08:23,360
Yeah.
94
00:08:23,460 --> 00:08:24,460
Yeah.
95
00:08:33,260 --> 00:08:34,260
Do you like it?
96
00:08:35,020 --> 00:08:36,020
Oh, yeah.
97
00:08:50,190 --> 00:08:51,590
What about when I do this?
98
00:08:53,110 --> 00:08:54,110
Uh -huh.
99
00:09:07,150 --> 00:09:09,930
Tim, why don't you take your clothes
off?
100
00:09:15,430 --> 00:09:18,250
Tim, we can't do anything if you keep
your clothes on.
101
00:09:18,780 --> 00:09:22,920
Look, I don't know about this. My
parents are out of town, and I don't
102
00:09:22,920 --> 00:09:24,280
they won't be back for another week.
103
00:09:27,180 --> 00:09:29,280
I'll make you forget all about your
parents.
104
00:09:29,960 --> 00:09:30,960
Oh, no.
105
00:09:32,220 --> 00:09:33,220
Be back.
106
00:09:39,480 --> 00:09:41,920
Wait, I thought I heard somebody drive
up. No.
107
00:09:43,260 --> 00:09:44,680
I think the door's locked.
108
00:09:50,819 --> 00:09:52,680
Nice. I have a nice body.
109
00:12:54,800 --> 00:12:55,800
Mmm.
110
00:13:28,810 --> 00:13:29,810
Yeah.
111
00:15:12,110 --> 00:15:13,110
Oh.
112
00:16:39,020 --> 00:16:40,020
Thank you.
113
00:17:51,560 --> 00:17:53,020
Thank you.
114
00:18:27,120 --> 00:18:28,520
. .
115
00:18:28,520 --> 00:18:41,120
.
116
00:18:53,200 --> 00:18:54,200
Oh.
117
00:19:30,250 --> 00:19:32,070
Thank you.
118
00:20:05,930 --> 00:20:08,870
We never discussed... Money?
119
00:20:09,130 --> 00:20:10,130
Yeah.
120
00:20:12,350 --> 00:20:15,910
Well, I had such a good time.
121
00:20:16,750 --> 00:20:18,230
This one's on the house.
122
00:20:19,110 --> 00:20:20,110
All right.
123
00:20:22,850 --> 00:20:25,190
I'm so glad that we could help you.
124
00:20:26,290 --> 00:20:31,290
It must be nice to be able to fulfill
your every wish and fantasy and the
125
00:20:31,290 --> 00:20:33,490
privacy and comfort.
126
00:20:34,700 --> 00:20:35,720
Of your own home.
127
00:20:37,360 --> 00:20:40,200
Loving kisses, Candy.
128
00:20:52,420 --> 00:20:57,640
Dear Candy, I don't want to tell you my
name for reasons I'm sure you'll
129
00:20:57,640 --> 00:20:58,640
understand.
130
00:20:58,940 --> 00:21:02,300
I frequently have sex with my mother.
131
00:21:03,340 --> 00:21:05,360
She was quite young when she had me.
132
00:21:20,360 --> 00:21:23,720
Tommy, listen, I'm tired. I'm going to
go to sleep now.
133
00:21:24,120 --> 00:21:25,099
Okay, Mom.
134
00:21:25,100 --> 00:21:26,100
Good night.
135
00:21:26,120 --> 00:21:27,120
Good night.
136
00:22:39,210 --> 00:22:40,210
keep a lady waiting.
137
00:23:15,120 --> 00:23:19,680
Pop Shot wins the event. All right? Take
it away, Mickey.
138
00:25:22,250 --> 00:25:23,510
Honey, what are you doing here?
139
00:25:27,090 --> 00:25:32,350
I didn't... I don't... I know you're
better looking than your father.
140
00:35:17,000 --> 00:35:18,000
There you go.
141
00:35:22,560 --> 00:35:23,560
Hello?
142
00:35:24,260 --> 00:35:25,900
Yeah, he's here. Hold on.
143
00:35:27,340 --> 00:35:28,340
Hello,
144
00:35:30,840 --> 00:35:33,140
Ralphie. How you doing? How's the
weather back there?
145
00:35:34,080 --> 00:35:40,680
Listen, I know why you called, and
honestly, I... Yeah, sure, I hired her,
146
00:35:40,680 --> 00:35:41,680
-huh.
147
00:35:42,640 --> 00:35:43,880
You don't say. You're kidding.
148
00:35:44,610 --> 00:35:48,310
That's great, Ralphie. That's great
news, buddy. All right, listen, my
149
00:35:48,310 --> 00:35:50,210
to whoever you're sleeping with, too.
Okay.
150
00:35:53,270 --> 00:35:54,450
What was that for?
151
00:35:54,810 --> 00:35:56,570
They love you. You're making magic.
152
00:35:57,010 --> 00:35:58,450
Who loves me, New York?
153
00:35:59,170 --> 00:36:02,850
Stugatz, New York. The people, the
readers, the little people, the general
154
00:36:02,850 --> 00:36:05,550
public, that's who loves you. Whatever
you're doing, keep it up.
155
00:36:24,750 --> 00:36:29,970
Dear Candy, my name's Nancy, and I'm
probably a little young to be writing to
156
00:36:29,970 --> 00:36:30,970
your magazine.
157
00:36:31,750 --> 00:36:35,810
My boyfriend and I went up to his
parents' cabin one weekend when they
158
00:36:35,810 --> 00:36:36,810
of town.
159
00:36:40,390 --> 00:36:41,390
Thank you.
160
00:36:43,190 --> 00:36:45,030
God, Rick, this is really beautiful.
161
00:36:45,950 --> 00:36:46,950
You're beautiful yourself.
162
00:36:47,490 --> 00:36:48,490
Thank you.
163
00:36:48,610 --> 00:36:49,610
So why don't you come over here?
164
00:37:00,840 --> 00:37:01,900
That's to you and this weekend.
165
00:37:02,340 --> 00:37:03,340
Thank you.
166
00:37:03,560 --> 00:37:05,000
I hope we have a good time.
167
00:37:05,600 --> 00:37:06,600
Sure we will.
168
00:37:07,300 --> 00:37:08,300
Do you want to play a little game?
169
00:37:09,320 --> 00:37:10,320
Sure.
170
00:37:10,560 --> 00:37:13,800
Okay, first I'll take a sip of my wine
and undo a button.
171
00:37:14,260 --> 00:37:16,660
And then you take a sip of your wine and
undo a button.
172
00:37:17,240 --> 00:37:19,000
Okay? Okay, you first.
173
00:37:19,500 --> 00:37:20,500
Okay, here I go.
174
00:37:22,640 --> 00:37:24,240
But I'm going to undo one of your
buttons, okay?
175
00:37:31,850 --> 00:37:33,830
Okay, now you take a sip and you have to
unbutton one of mine.
176
00:37:41,470 --> 00:37:43,790
I'll have to take a sip and unbutton
another one of yours.
177
00:37:49,390 --> 00:37:55,970
What is this leading to?
178
00:37:56,790 --> 00:37:58,050
Well, I'll show you.
179
00:40:08,200 --> 00:40:09,200
Thank you.
180
00:40:59,280 --> 00:41:00,280
Oh.
181
00:44:16,650 --> 00:44:17,650
Wow.
182
00:45:19,069 --> 00:45:21,870
oh oh
183
00:45:43,690 --> 00:45:44,950
Oh, God.
184
00:46:18,920 --> 00:46:25,500
Your boyfriend gets so into it that it
seems infectious even to me.
185
00:46:26,720 --> 00:46:27,720
P .S.
186
00:46:28,620 --> 00:46:32,040
Sounds like you also get to drink some
superior wine in the process.
187
00:46:34,540 --> 00:46:35,540
Love and kisses.
188
00:47:00,680 --> 00:47:01,720
Candy, how are you?
189
00:47:02,920 --> 00:47:06,460
I wrote to you once before, but the
letter wasn't run in your magazine.
190
00:47:07,320 --> 00:47:08,540
I'm from out of state.
191
00:47:09,180 --> 00:47:10,500
Montana, to be exact.
192
00:47:11,480 --> 00:47:13,840
I frequently am in your city on
business.
193
00:47:14,420 --> 00:47:17,180
I have a best friend who lives there
with his wife.
194
00:47:17,880 --> 00:47:21,420
I've known this guy for years. Well, the
army, you know.
195
00:47:22,260 --> 00:47:25,100
Anyway, the last time I was in town, I
dropped by.
196
00:47:25,960 --> 00:47:30,380
He was out of town himself, but his wife
was very happy.
197
00:47:30,590 --> 00:47:31,590
suitable.
198
00:49:05,480 --> 00:49:06,480
What are you doing here?
199
00:49:06,860 --> 00:49:08,840
I saw you watching me in the hot tub.
200
00:49:09,520 --> 00:49:11,140
But you're my best friend's wife.
201
00:49:12,240 --> 00:49:13,240
So?
202
00:50:06,120 --> 00:50:07,120
Thank you.
203
00:52:12,220 --> 00:52:13,220
Thank you.
204
00:57:55,600 --> 00:57:57,440
I'll answer that one in the morning.
205
00:58:17,000 --> 00:58:18,000
Okay.
206
00:58:19,500 --> 00:58:24,800
Dear Candy, I'm writing to tell you...
207
00:58:25,589 --> 00:58:29,410
of a love at first sight.
208
00:58:32,350 --> 00:58:33,570
Here's your coffee, Miss Money.
209
00:58:33,790 --> 00:58:34,790
My thanks, Jimmy.
210
00:58:34,970 --> 00:58:36,270
Mr. Taylor sent it in for you.
211
00:58:37,830 --> 00:58:38,230
Dear
212
00:58:38,230 --> 00:58:50,250
Candy,
213
00:58:50,940 --> 00:58:55,120
I'm writing anonymously to you about a
problem my girlfriend and I shared.
214
00:58:56,000 --> 00:58:57,820
Neither of us could get off together.
215
00:58:58,740 --> 00:59:02,480
I used to get off watching her
masturbate, but she didn't.
216
00:59:02,860 --> 00:59:07,680
Until one day we realized that a sound
banking brought her to orgasm.
217
01:01:16,330 --> 01:01:17,330
Thank you.
218
01:02:38,860 --> 01:02:41,700
Oh, Michael, you know how much I love to
be thanked.
219
01:02:42,820 --> 01:02:44,420
Pam, bring me so much pleasure.
220
01:02:45,520 --> 01:02:46,520
Make me harder.
221
01:02:49,740 --> 01:02:50,740
Harder.
222
01:06:51,470 --> 01:06:52,470
Ugh.
223
01:06:52,790 --> 01:06:53,790
Ugh.
224
01:07:21,480 --> 01:07:22,760
on company stationery.
225
01:07:23,440 --> 01:07:27,300
Dear Candy, I'm writing to tell you of a
love at first sight.
226
01:07:27,800 --> 01:07:30,760
There's a young girl who works for me at
the magazine which I edit.
227
01:07:31,180 --> 01:07:34,500
I was smitten by her from the day I
interviewed her for the job.
228
01:07:34,900 --> 01:07:38,980
I can't get up the nerve to express my
feelings verbally, but there will be a
229
01:07:38,980 --> 01:07:43,880
limo outside of Petum Magazine waiting
to whisk her to my private domain where
230
01:07:43,880 --> 01:07:47,440
I'd love to express myself verbally and
then some.
231
01:07:50,000 --> 01:07:51,820
So that's why it's easier in print.
232
01:07:52,300 --> 01:07:57,060
I think I've always been better at
expressing myself on paper than I have
233
01:07:57,060 --> 01:07:58,060
conversation.
234
01:07:58,960 --> 01:08:00,160
Would you like some more wine?
235
01:08:00,580 --> 01:08:01,580
Please.
236
01:08:06,000 --> 01:08:08,020
You know, I think that's why I'm a
writer.
237
01:08:08,980 --> 01:08:11,700
Some things are just more easily written
than said.
238
01:08:13,680 --> 01:08:14,680
Right.
239
01:08:15,120 --> 01:08:19,010
Well, we've been here, uh... Long
enough, I think, to express ourselves
240
01:08:19,010 --> 01:08:20,370
about as best that we could.
241
01:08:21,090 --> 01:08:23,569
What do you say we try to do it
physically?
242
01:08:24,090 --> 01:08:25,090
You bet.
243
01:08:25,590 --> 01:08:28,010
I'll save me time at the office
answering your letter.
244
01:11:06,640 --> 01:11:08,040
Why don't you take your clothes off?
245
01:11:08,600 --> 01:11:10,980
I think I have something underneath that
you'll like.
246
01:11:11,340 --> 01:11:18,080
Oh, yeah, it's very
247
01:11:18,080 --> 01:11:19,080
beautiful.
16282
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