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1
00:00:06,600 --> 00:00:08,145
The right hand.
2
00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:10,773
The 'French Horn.'
3
00:00:11,404 --> 00:00:14,233
It is often used ...
4
00:00:14,653 --> 00:00:16,406
... by scoundrels.
5
00:00:19,517 --> 00:00:22,507
When calling for a beer.
6
00:00:22,578 --> 00:00:24,709
When calling for a beer in English ...
7
00:00:24,859 --> 00:00:26,647
... it is used in combination ...
8
00:00:26,748 --> 00:00:31,807
... with vulgar words referring
to the special parts of an ox or bull.
9
00:00:31,808 --> 00:00:35,220
Form a funnel with both hands,
blow on the base, and ...
10
00:00:35,221 --> 00:00:38,194
... the sound comes out.
11
00:00:40,160 --> 00:00:41,605
The 'Vernacchio' ...
12
00:00:42,524 --> 00:00:44,217
... or direct sound, ...
13
00:00:44,705 --> 00:00:48,518
... is produced by the vibration
of the tongue on the lips.
14
00:00:50,461 --> 00:00:52,122
It is used when ...
15
00:00:52,577 --> 00:00:54,918
... someone doesn't want to give the finger.
16
00:00:55,018 --> 00:00:58,248
And this is often the mark of a coward.
17
00:00:59,102 --> 00:01:00,963
The 'Vernacchia', ...
18
00:01:01,831 --> 00:01:03,272
... or delicate one, ...
19
00:01:04,355 --> 00:01:05,948
... it is used when ...
20
00:01:06,532 --> 00:01:10,507
... you've developed a tension headache
from staying out very late pressing wine ...
21
00:01:10,816 --> 00:01:12,092
... seriously.
22
00:01:12,192 --> 00:01:13,516
And finally, ...
23
00:01:13,616 --> 00:01:15,024
... 'Just Look at the Hour.'
24
00:01:16,962 --> 00:01:20,327
We need an exceptional
circumstance for it.
25
00:01:20,328 --> 00:01:23,385
Such as the presence of an Archbishop ...
26
00:01:23,386 --> 00:01:25,512
... who has sent you a love letter.
27
00:01:27,038 --> 00:01:29,226
It is made with the hands only ...
28
00:01:30,306 --> 00:01:32,501
... so no one knows who did it.
29
00:02:48,611 --> 00:02:52,468
SEX IN THE HEAD
[aka ITALIAN SEX]
30
00:04:50,703 --> 00:04:53,091
The candidate for degree, Diana Tornessi.
31
00:04:53,962 --> 00:04:55,557
Let her in, Conigliero.
32
00:05:02,915 --> 00:05:04,826
Please, Miss Tornessi.
33
00:05:18,090 --> 00:05:20,472
Ladies and gentlemen, we all
know the subject of this thesis.
34
00:05:22,926 --> 00:05:25,587
- Go ahead...
- In order to earn my degree in sociology, ...
35
00:05:25,607 --> 00:05:26,886
... I chose as my subject ...
36
00:05:26,886 --> 00:05:29,959
... the way Italian men treat prostitutes ...
37
00:05:29,959 --> 00:05:32,008
... and prostitution in our major cities.
38
00:05:32,158 --> 00:05:33,831
In order to study this subject, ...
39
00:05:33,831 --> 00:05:36,831
... I lived as a prostitute for several weeks.
40
00:05:39,528 --> 00:05:42,601
As you can see, my thesis is
divided into the following chapters:
41
00:05:42,601 --> 00:05:45,056
Getting started in prostitution.
42
00:05:45,641 --> 00:05:48,042
Solicitation on the street
and coitus in the car.
43
00:05:48,043 --> 00:05:51,145
Solicitation and coitus in small hotels.
44
00:05:51,146 --> 00:05:54,375
Solicitation in newspapers,
working in a whore house, ...
45
00:05:54,442 --> 00:05:56,003
... and from my own home.
46
00:05:57,446 --> 00:05:59,434
So I worked as a hooker, ...
47
00:05:59,434 --> 00:06:00,396
... as a prostitute, ...
48
00:06:00,396 --> 00:06:01,540
... and a call girl.
49
00:06:02,795 --> 00:06:04,683
I discovered many interesting things.
50
00:06:05,260 --> 00:06:08,652
Different clients had different tastes ...
51
00:06:08,652 --> 00:06:12,100
... and different requests
depending on where they had coitus.
52
00:06:14,828 --> 00:06:18,124
"My first client was a forty year old man.
53
00:06:19,789 --> 00:06:23,914
"He was wearing a suit, had a nice
car and asked me to get in with him.
54
00:06:24,526 --> 00:06:26,314
"I told him:
'Five thousand'.
55
00:06:28,366 --> 00:06:29,414
"Five thousand with..."
56
00:06:31,215 --> 00:06:34,351
"He gave me salacious look
and I got into the car.
57
00:06:34,351 --> 00:06:36,208
"He took me to a deserted place,
58
00:06:36,208 --> 00:06:38,799
"... parked the car and
lit a cigarette.
59
00:06:38,799 --> 00:06:40,752
"I wasn't worried.
60
00:06:40,752 --> 00:06:42,574
"But he was nervous.
61
00:06:43,440 --> 00:06:45,197
"So nervous that...
62
00:06:46,225 --> 00:06:47,850
"... he ate a cheese sandwich."
63
00:06:49,393 --> 00:06:50,624
That's what she wrote.
64
00:06:52,817 --> 00:06:56,241
"He looked at me, took his penis out, ...
65
00:06:56,241 --> 00:06:58,030
... and it was flacid."
66
00:06:59,345 --> 00:07:00,940
That's on page three, Father.
67
00:07:02,895 --> 00:07:03,922
A point.
68
00:07:08,201 --> 00:07:09,548
Excuse me Miss, ...
69
00:07:10,228 --> 00:07:13,395
... you meant penis as in a cock, right?
70
00:07:13,395 --> 00:07:15,948
Because... as I'm from Puglia...
71
00:07:16,660 --> 00:07:18,897
I may have misunderstood the word...
72
00:07:19,956 --> 00:07:21,364
"I took off my panties, ...
73
00:07:22,197 --> 00:07:23,310
"... and got in the back of the car.
74
00:07:24,437 --> 00:07:26,347
"Meanwhile he was arousing himself.
75
00:07:27,285 --> 00:07:28,977
"When he was ready, he penetrated me.
76
00:07:31,222 --> 00:07:32,115
"He penetrated me.
77
00:07:34,518 --> 00:07:36,306
"In two or three minutes he was finished.
78
00:07:38,902 --> 00:07:39,731
"He paid me, ....
79
00:07:45,144 --> 00:07:48,152
"He paid me and took me back home.
80
00:07:48,153 --> 00:07:49,529
"I was pleased.
81
00:07:49,529 --> 00:07:53,593
"My idea was quite simple...
82
00:07:53,593 --> 00:07:57,391
"I would conduct the research,
and produce a fully documented thesis."
83
00:07:58,166 --> 00:08:00,654
Silence! Silence! No comments!
84
00:08:08,699 --> 00:08:10,170
I beg your pardon Miss, but...
85
00:08:10,170 --> 00:08:11,763
... did you really ...
86
00:08:13,083 --> 00:08:15,222
... let's say... you touched
him with your own hands ...
87
00:08:16,576 --> 00:08:21,277
I mean, you personally
carried out these experiments.
88
00:08:21,278 --> 00:08:23,419
Tell us about the thesis, please.
89
00:08:23,419 --> 00:08:26,365
I worked three months and
had 200 sexual encounters.
90
00:08:26,865 --> 00:08:28,349
Two hundred men?
91
00:08:28,349 --> 00:08:31,005
No, sometimes they were the same men.
92
00:08:31,005 --> 00:08:32,061
What do you mean?
93
00:08:32,061 --> 00:08:36,286
I mean that I actually had 150 different men.
94
00:08:36,287 --> 00:08:37,531
Some of them were previous clients.
95
00:08:37,599 --> 00:08:39,822
Nevertheless, you had 200 sexual encounters!
96
00:08:40,222 --> 00:08:42,270
There may have been more.
97
00:08:42,270 --> 00:08:43,934
Let's not quibble about details.
98
00:08:43,934 --> 00:08:48,058
During my free time I had
to study and work on my thesis.
99
00:08:50,399 --> 00:08:52,406
She was studying... please go on.
100
00:08:52,895 --> 00:08:55,489
This was my first outing as a prostitute.
101
00:08:55,489 --> 00:08:58,239
Swinging my handbag, I fit right in.
102
00:09:07,970 --> 00:09:08,865
Excuse me ladies,
103
00:09:08,865 --> 00:09:10,243
I'm doing interviews for the radio.
104
00:09:10,243 --> 00:09:12,354
Would you agree
to join a labor union?
105
00:09:12,354 --> 00:09:15,939
We're not in Copenhagen!
We work for ourselves!
106
00:09:15,939 --> 00:09:16,707
Thank you.
107
00:09:16,707 --> 00:09:17,635
What do you think about it?
108
00:09:17,635 --> 00:09:20,668
I think that we should.
109
00:09:21,347 --> 00:09:27,807
The prostitute needs protection today.
110
00:09:28,356 --> 00:09:31,940
That doesn't mean I want a pimp.
111
00:09:31,941 --> 00:09:33,382
Do you need a pimp?
112
00:09:34,077 --> 00:09:35,893
- What did you say?
- A pimp.
113
00:09:36,217 --> 00:09:37,214
Thank you.
114
00:09:37,604 --> 00:09:39,621
What problems do you think prostitutes face?
115
00:09:39,621 --> 00:09:41,214
No comment.
116
00:09:41,636 --> 00:09:42,434
And you?
117
00:09:42,758 --> 00:09:46,206
Do you think you're
on Teulada Road? Get lost!
118
00:09:47,015 --> 00:09:50,882
Excuse me. If you joined
a labor union, could you retire?
119
00:09:50,976 --> 00:09:54,375
I already earn enough
money renting out hotel rooms.
120
00:09:54,375 --> 00:09:56,775
He's asking if you'll
retire when you're old.
121
00:09:56,775 --> 00:10:01,256
I've been working 30
years now! Don't bother me!
122
00:10:01,257 --> 00:10:04,105
Especially tonight, since
there are no clients!
123
00:10:04,106 --> 00:10:05,382
You're right! Why is he bothering us?
124
00:10:05,818 --> 00:10:08,177
- Redeem yourself brother!
- I have no time. Thanks.
125
00:10:08,237 --> 00:10:10,890
Redeem yourself sister!
Redeem yourself sister!
126
00:10:10,891 --> 00:10:12,009
Sister?! You're a eunuch!
127
00:10:12,009 --> 00:10:13,831
Redeem yourself sister!
128
00:10:14,698 --> 00:10:16,458
Redeem yourself sister!
129
00:10:16,458 --> 00:10:17,984
Redeem yourself sister!
130
00:10:26,975 --> 00:10:28,486
Five thousand.
131
00:10:28,663 --> 00:10:30,988
They ask you how much,
but they can't pay you.
132
00:10:30,988 --> 00:10:33,291
That's typical of our men.
133
00:10:33,291 --> 00:10:35,308
They look at each other and leave, ...
134
00:10:35,308 --> 00:10:37,605
... going into the bushes to look at you.
135
00:10:38,213 --> 00:10:40,901
Redeem yourself sister!
Redeem yourself sister!
136
00:10:55,695 --> 00:10:56,643
Come on girls!
137
00:10:58,062 --> 00:10:59,111
Quick! Quick!
138
00:11:01,424 --> 00:11:02,701
Take them all!
139
00:11:05,904 --> 00:11:08,839
Get these whores into the van!
140
00:11:10,544 --> 00:11:13,009
I wasn't looking for a client!
I know my rights!
141
00:11:13,009 --> 00:11:15,080
I'll tell you the rights! Now move!
142
00:11:18,065 --> 00:11:20,270
In the van, quick!
143
00:11:38,676 --> 00:11:39,732
You know, Mister President...
144
00:11:39,733 --> 00:11:40,333
Yes, dear.
145
00:11:40,533 --> 00:11:45,012
Sometimes it's not easy to find a man.
Not all of you like prostitutes.
146
00:11:45,012 --> 00:11:46,998
That's right, not all of us like...
147
00:11:46,998 --> 00:11:51,830
If that happens, the prostitute
is the one who chases the man.
148
00:11:51,831 --> 00:11:56,791
How? What do you do it?
149
00:11:56,792 --> 00:12:00,140
She makes him think it's an adventure.
150
00:12:01,494 --> 00:12:03,930
Women know more than the Devil himself!
151
00:12:06,667 --> 00:12:10,302
Women will always win against the Devil.
152
00:12:11,705 --> 00:12:14,295
During my study, I met many prostitutes.
153
00:12:14,295 --> 00:12:18,008
One day, just to satisfy my curiosity, one of them ...
154
00:12:18,008 --> 00:12:20,692
... invited me to see how she chased men.
155
00:12:33,379 --> 00:12:34,420
Here she comes!
156
00:12:35,708 --> 00:12:39,417
- It's always the same!
- She climbs these steps a lot!
157
00:12:50,197 --> 00:12:51,409
Your package, Miss!
158
00:12:52,021 --> 00:12:53,557
You dropped your package!
159
00:12:53,957 --> 00:12:57,626
- Merci beaucoup!
- You are welcome!
160
00:13:00,611 --> 00:13:05,118
If you don't mind, I'll help you.
161
00:13:05,119 --> 00:13:07,999
You are very kind!
162
00:13:08,000 --> 00:13:09,663
Vous ete fran�ais!
163
00:13:09,664 --> 00:13:11,479
Oui! Parigenne!
164
00:13:11,979 --> 00:13:13,659
May I accompany you?
165
00:13:13,759 --> 00:13:15,353
Merci!
166
00:13:17,532 --> 00:13:21,432
She's good!
167
00:13:28,245 --> 00:13:29,688
Vive la France!
168
00:14:15,746 --> 00:14:18,083
What's the name of that monument?
169
00:14:18,983 --> 00:14:21,913
It's called The Italian Culo [ass]!
170
00:14:22,824 --> 00:14:23,975
What's a Culo?
171
00:14:23,975 --> 00:14:27,805
You don't know?
Why did you come to Italy?
172
00:14:30,697 --> 00:14:33,513
Miss, allow me to sum up. You wrote that ...
173
00:14:33,513 --> 00:14:39,178
... most of these clients were
between 40 and 45 years of age.
174
00:14:39,178 --> 00:14:41,283
Yes, young men are quite rare.
175
00:14:41,284 --> 00:14:43,595
Luckily, young people are saved!
176
00:14:43,595 --> 00:14:45,995
Father, we don't care about young people!
177
00:14:45,995 --> 00:14:50,315
I mean... the crisis is
between 40 and 45 years of age.
178
00:14:50,315 --> 00:14:52,875
Miss, what about 40 year old men?
179
00:14:52,875 --> 00:14:56,395
I acquired the clients of the girl
who had lived in the flat into which I moved.
180
00:14:56,395 --> 00:14:58,572
I gave her enough money to leave.
181
00:14:58,572 --> 00:15:00,743
- This is how it is done.
- Is it?
182
00:15:01,069 --> 00:15:04,205
Let's go back to talk
about 40 years old men.
183
00:15:04,205 --> 00:15:05,613
Yes, let's return to that...
184
00:15:05,613 --> 00:15:09,005
Usually they've come to Rome on business.
185
00:15:09,005 --> 00:15:13,578
Yes, I know. They usually
come from Turin, Milan...
186
00:15:15,022 --> 00:15:20,260
Some are dealers, some business men.
187
00:15:21,935 --> 00:15:24,204
One of my more interesting cases was ...
188
00:15:27,207 --> 00:15:29,308
Look what happened to me!
189
00:15:29,808 --> 00:15:32,140
Look what happened to me!
190
00:15:32,240 --> 00:15:35,088
Nice! Elegant!
191
00:15:36,240 --> 00:15:37,550
Functional!
192
00:15:38,898 --> 00:15:40,653
There's even a toilet!
193
00:15:40,945 --> 00:15:42,352
Luxury!
194
00:15:42,993 --> 00:15:45,234
This cost you a lot, uh?
195
00:15:45,234 --> 00:15:50,352
Well, if you want to be successful,
you have to invest in the best.
196
00:15:51,731 --> 00:15:53,419
Look what happened to me!
197
00:15:54,579 --> 00:15:57,809
Trust your friends! He was my friend!
198
00:15:59,252 --> 00:16:01,652
That son of a bitch!
199
00:16:01,653 --> 00:16:05,941
I have to meet with that bastard!
He's going to pay!
200
00:16:05,941 --> 00:16:12,181
He'll pay! Did he forget we grew up together?
201
00:16:12,181 --> 00:16:15,926
When we were kids, we were poor.
202
00:16:15,926 --> 00:16:19,309
He was even poorer than me!
203
00:16:20,054 --> 00:16:23,350
Who helped him become
a member of parliament?
204
00:16:24,555 --> 00:16:32,023
He asked for my vote!
My mother's, my father's, my sister's!
205
00:16:32,024 --> 00:16:36,536
My stupid wife's and her friends',
who are even more stupid than her!
206
00:16:36,536 --> 00:16:40,185
Did I do it for myself?
I didn't do it for myself!
207
00:16:40,185 --> 00:16:44,825
That's because I'm an industrialist,
even if I live in a small village!
208
00:16:44,825 --> 00:16:51,570
I own a factory!
I don't need them! They need me!
209
00:16:52,121 --> 00:16:55,547
Member of Parliament!
I made him a big shot!
210
00:16:55,547 --> 00:16:57,434
He made promises.
211
00:16:57,434 --> 00:17:01,403
He told me... he told me: Epifanio...
Open your legs.
212
00:17:01,403 --> 00:17:05,371
He told me: When there's an
election, give me your vote ...
213
00:17:05,371 --> 00:17:08,411
.. and ask other people to
vote for me. I'll make you rich!
214
00:17:08,411 --> 00:17:15,389
Your village trusts you. I'll make
sure you win the contract for the toilets.
215
00:17:15,389 --> 00:17:19,838
An open-ended contract, for all the barracks.
216
00:17:19,839 --> 00:17:24,572
They are a lot of them!
Epifanio, you'll make the army go to the toilet!
217
00:17:25,950 --> 00:17:30,879
He made me wait 4 hours this morning!
Do you understand?
218
00:17:30,930 --> 00:17:39,477
Then, when I had become angry
enough, he sent his secretary to see me ...
219
00:17:39,552 --> 00:17:41,599
... who told me he couldn't meet with me.
220
00:17:41,599 --> 00:17:44,609
That's because he had to go to Montecitorio ....
221
00:17:44,609 --> 00:17:51,074
... where he had a meeting
about a commercial matter.
222
00:17:51,074 --> 00:17:55,547
A matter... fuck his matters!
223
00:17:57,761 --> 00:18:00,631
I don't matter?
Am I not important too?
224
00:18:00,962 --> 00:18:05,719
When I get back to my village,
what will I tell my friends?
225
00:18:05,795 --> 00:18:09,411
What will I tell the Mayor?
That our Member of Parliament wouldn't see me?
226
00:18:09,411 --> 00:18:12,675
What if they spit on me?
227
00:18:12,675 --> 00:18:15,012
And what if they blame me for what I've done?
228
00:18:15,012 --> 00:18:17,509
I have to meet him!
229
00:18:17,509 --> 00:18:21,253
I brought everything.
Everything I needed.
230
00:18:21,253 --> 00:18:23,462
Look here! I have a sample.
231
00:18:23,462 --> 00:18:25,733
A sample of the
product from the factory.
232
00:18:25,733 --> 00:18:29,126
Look at this! A urinal!
233
00:18:29,126 --> 00:18:32,742
Everything was ready! All we need
is a model, and we'll build a monument.
234
00:18:32,742 --> 00:18:36,327
A marble monument
with the title: Hero's Urine!
235
00:18:36,327 --> 00:18:39,144
We do have to be discrete
about how we portray the hero!
236
00:18:39,144 --> 00:18:42,535
But the hero is a man!
And a man has to piss!
237
00:18:42,535 --> 00:18:44,804
Do you understand, this is important!
238
00:18:52,713 --> 00:18:54,761
Look what happened to me!
239
00:18:54,762 --> 00:18:57,031
Someone like me, who
has no problem spending money.
240
00:18:57,217 --> 00:18:59,090
Here's your tip!
241
00:19:01,091 --> 00:19:02,691
I enjoyed it...
242
00:19:02,890 --> 00:19:05,898
If I find him! If I find him...
243
00:19:07,698 --> 00:19:10,823
Excuse me, I don't remember.
Did I fuck you or not?
244
00:19:10,923 --> 00:19:14,420
Because I'm so confused!
245
00:19:22,400 --> 00:19:24,172
What a strange guy, uh?
246
00:19:24,173 --> 00:19:26,041
- Insane! Insane!
- Yes...
247
00:19:26,341 --> 00:19:27,886
... like macaroni!
248
00:19:27,886 --> 00:19:31,596
Let's say he's a man
with problems in politics.
249
00:19:34,413 --> 00:19:35,727
Conigliero!
250
00:19:35,727 --> 00:19:36,878
I'm still here!
251
00:19:36,878 --> 00:19:40,271
Conigliero, make them
shut up before I get angry!
252
00:19:40,271 --> 00:19:45,093
Damn you! You really want
me to lose my job, don't you?
253
00:19:46,670 --> 00:19:47,984
Who is that man?
254
00:19:47,985 --> 00:19:49,772
What a wonderful man!
255
00:19:50,612 --> 00:19:55,020
These are my empirical observations:
256
00:19:55,520 --> 00:19:58,788
The average penis length in Italy is 6 inches, ...
257
00:19:59,024 --> 00:20:00,981
... and 4 inches in circumference.
258
00:20:02,355 --> 00:20:06,613
- The shortest penis I've seen was 2.5 inches long.
- Poor man...
259
00:20:06,929 --> 00:20:08,885
The biggest was 10 inches long.
260
00:20:10,330 --> 00:20:12,864
The penis is bigger in Italy nowadays, uh?
261
00:20:14,098 --> 00:20:16,484
I was talking about something else...
262
00:20:16,883 --> 00:20:19,999
We always learn something
new at the university, uh?
263
00:20:22,328 --> 00:20:28,008
Miss, tell me, how could you be
sure of the length of a client's penis?
264
00:20:28,108 --> 00:20:29,236
I measured them.
265
00:20:35,437 --> 00:20:37,705
Excuse me! I don't
see the point in any of this!
266
00:20:38,005 --> 00:20:39,829
What don't you understand?!
I haven't understood anything either!
267
00:20:39,829 --> 00:20:41,910
Conigliero! I don't need to hear
from these idiots! Make them shut up!
268
00:20:41,910 --> 00:20:43,414
Shut up!
269
00:20:43,914 --> 00:20:45,107
- Bravo!
- Thank you!
270
00:20:45,207 --> 00:20:48,152
Please, Miss, continue with
your report. Don't worry about them.
271
00:20:48,153 --> 00:20:53,079
What else about your Italian
clients caught your attention?
272
00:20:53,079 --> 00:20:56,441
Well, there's one thing in particular.
273
00:20:56,441 --> 00:21:02,553
It's about the taboos
that most Italian men share.
274
00:21:02,553 --> 00:21:03,860
Sexual taboos.
275
00:21:03,861 --> 00:21:06,500
The pleasure of profaning all things sacred.
276
00:21:06,501 --> 00:21:08,861
The pleasure of the
outrage caused by the sacrilege.
277
00:21:09,145 --> 00:21:11,769
You have something to
tell us about it, isn't it?
278
00:21:11,770 --> 00:21:14,218
Yes. It's about a nun.
279
00:21:14,565 --> 00:21:18,093
- I object!
- Don't start complaining, Father.
280
00:21:18,094 --> 00:21:20,826
- Isn't a nun is one of God's creatures too?
- That's not true!
281
00:21:20,923 --> 00:21:24,279
Oh come on Father! Sometimes
a nun is just a beautiful woman!
282
00:21:24,379 --> 00:21:28,315
If this girl insists on going on like this, ...
283
00:21:28,315 --> 00:21:29,463
... I'll leave the classroom!
284
00:21:29,546 --> 00:21:31,324
Now that this is becoming interesting?
285
00:21:31,324 --> 00:21:33,976
It's 1974, try to be more open minded!
286
00:21:34,076 --> 00:21:35,644
It's impossible to be any more
open minded than this, Mister President!
287
00:21:35,645 --> 00:21:39,772
If you want to condemn the girl,
do it later. I need to continue.
288
00:21:39,773 --> 00:21:44,125
You're making this classroom like a... like a...
289
00:21:44,125 --> 00:21:46,941
With your blessing Father, with your blessing.
290
00:21:46,941 --> 00:21:49,179
Can we go on? Do you agree?
291
00:21:49,838 --> 00:21:50,850
Please...
292
00:21:58,035 --> 00:22:00,404
Damn, we're too late!
293
00:22:00,670 --> 00:22:02,559
When will we get in there?
294
00:22:02,559 --> 00:22:03,936
Look how many cars are ahead of us!
295
00:22:03,936 --> 00:22:05,440
It's an endless line!
296
00:22:05,440 --> 00:22:08,032
I counted them: There are 10 ahead of us!
297
00:22:08,032 --> 00:22:09,793
I don't care if I have to wait.
298
00:22:09,793 --> 00:22:12,214
It's the first time I'll get to fuck
a nun, and I don't want to miss it!
299
00:22:13,533 --> 00:22:15,072
Relax, I'm ahead of you!
300
00:22:15,072 --> 00:22:18,041
There's another car load of men! Wow!
301
00:22:22,274 --> 00:22:23,842
It's my turn, it's my turn!
302
00:22:23,842 --> 00:22:25,827
- Go, go!
- I want to try it too!
303
00:22:25,827 --> 00:22:27,321
It was great!
304
00:22:39,972 --> 00:22:41,250
Good evening, sister.
305
00:22:43,429 --> 00:22:45,119
Who are you?
306
00:22:46,277 --> 00:22:48,324
Haven't I met you somewhere?
307
00:22:48,324 --> 00:22:50,332
I don't know... maybe in Church?
308
00:22:51,109 --> 00:22:52,996
In Church.
309
00:22:54,310 --> 00:22:56,798
Oh come on! Maybe in some brothel?
310
00:22:59,223 --> 00:23:02,772
Come on, boy! There are
a lot of people waiting outside!
311
00:23:06,983 --> 00:23:08,190
Enough!
312
00:23:09,172 --> 00:23:15,432
Listen to me! I want this wicked girl ...
313
00:23:15,432 --> 00:23:18,569
... to tell me where this thing happened!
314
00:23:18,569 --> 00:23:21,706
The name and the surname of that nun!
315
00:23:21,706 --> 00:23:24,330
And the religious ordination
she belonged to!
316
00:23:24,330 --> 00:23:28,605
I will denounce her as well,
in case she is reluctant to tell!
317
00:23:29,246 --> 00:23:31,752
Father, you haven't understood.
318
00:23:32,587 --> 00:23:34,219
I understood quite well.
319
00:23:34,219 --> 00:23:35,018
The name!
320
00:23:35,018 --> 00:23:37,131
- Mister President,
- Yes, dear.
321
00:23:37,131 --> 00:23:39,083
That woman wasn't a real nun.
322
00:23:39,083 --> 00:23:40,872
She was a prostitute.
323
00:23:41,195 --> 00:23:42,668
That's good to know.
324
00:23:42,668 --> 00:23:44,591
A very good one.
325
00:23:45,612 --> 00:23:47,884
She studied the issue,...
326
00:23:47,884 --> 00:23:50,919
... and learned that Italian
men love to profane sacred things.
327
00:23:51,469 --> 00:23:53,612
Do you know how much
she earned in three months?
328
00:23:53,612 --> 00:23:54,381
How much?
329
00:23:54,381 --> 00:23:55,243
12 million!
330
00:23:56,077 --> 00:23:58,190
She wanted to take advantage
of Italian men's weakness,
331
00:23:58,190 --> 00:24:00,045
and she was successful for three months.
332
00:24:00,045 --> 00:24:02,287
Then she was arrested.
333
00:24:02,287 --> 00:24:04,075
And she become a cloistered nun.
334
00:24:04,206 --> 00:24:06,279
All the newspapers talked about it.
335
00:24:07,504 --> 00:24:09,608
You can go on, Miss.
336
00:24:10,767 --> 00:24:13,775
The act of desecration takes on many forms.
337
00:24:13,775 --> 00:24:15,024
Did you experience desecration?
338
00:24:15,024 --> 00:24:17,071
I have some personal knowledge of it.
339
00:24:17,071 --> 00:24:19,658
Please, desecrate, desecrate!
That's why we're here!
340
00:24:21,753 --> 00:24:23,146
I'm coming!
341
00:24:25,041 --> 00:24:26,798
I'm coming!
342
00:24:31,922 --> 00:24:33,297
Are you Lanfranco Ceccarelli?
343
00:24:33,297 --> 00:24:35,054
I'm Lanfranco Ceccarelli! Come on in!
344
00:24:36,307 --> 00:24:37,815
You're so beautiful!
345
00:24:37,816 --> 00:24:40,595
Sister Olga told me,
but I couldn't imagine you'd be like this!
346
00:24:40,595 --> 00:24:42,130
- Let's go upstairs!
- Yes.
347
00:24:42,130 --> 00:24:44,979
You're so fine!
Did you find the house easily?
348
00:24:44,979 --> 00:24:48,180
- Yes.
- I want to show you what I'll do to you!
349
00:24:48,180 --> 00:24:51,029
Let's go upstairs!
I prepared everything. I'm ready!
350
00:24:51,796 --> 00:24:54,453
Come in. I've never had someone
as beautiful as you are!
351
00:24:54,453 --> 00:24:57,716
Let me look at you!
You're perfect! Beautiful!
352
00:24:57,716 --> 00:25:00,084
Tell me, why are you a prostitute?
353
00:25:03,861 --> 00:25:05,367
You are not offended, are you?
354
00:25:05,367 --> 00:25:07,511
I said prostitute without thinking.
355
00:25:07,511 --> 00:25:10,160
Don't be upset with me, come on!
356
00:25:10,551 --> 00:25:12,598
Don't worry, I'm used to it.
357
00:25:12,598 --> 00:25:13,495
That's what I am.
358
00:25:13,495 --> 00:25:15,154
You are kind, too!
359
00:25:15,863 --> 00:25:17,751
Let's do a striptease to music!
360
00:25:17,751 --> 00:25:18,481
Okay.
361
00:25:25,592 --> 00:25:27,502
Why don't you get undressed?
362
00:25:28,120 --> 00:25:30,169
You're in a hurry, eh?
363
00:25:30,169 --> 00:25:32,537
I understand that.
364
00:25:32,538 --> 00:25:34,478
But I'm a very clean guy.
365
00:25:34,479 --> 00:25:38,360
I'm going to take a
shower now, and wash my toy!
366
00:25:39,162 --> 00:25:40,986
I'll go and wash everything.
Then I'll be right back!
367
00:25:40,986 --> 00:25:42,448
Let me find you all naked!
368
00:25:43,483 --> 00:25:45,522
Be quick! I don't want to waste time!
369
00:26:07,677 --> 00:26:10,750
Listen! Lanfranco?
370
00:26:10,750 --> 00:26:12,958
What is it, dear?
371
00:26:12,958 --> 00:26:15,070
Do you have anything to drink?
372
00:26:15,070 --> 00:26:18,527
I have everything!
373
00:26:18,527 --> 00:26:21,183
Look in the kitchen, in the fridge.
374
00:26:21,183 --> 00:26:22,655
Can I go in there?
375
00:26:22,655 --> 00:26:24,892
Of course! Help yourself!
376
00:26:38,072 --> 00:26:39,329
What's wrong with you?
377
00:26:39,329 --> 00:26:42,177
There... there's a corpse there!
378
00:26:43,554 --> 00:26:45,250
Haven't you ever seen a corpse?
379
00:26:45,250 --> 00:26:47,170
Yes, but she's in there!
380
00:26:47,170 --> 00:26:49,987
She's dead among
the flowers and candles!
381
00:26:49,987 --> 00:26:53,475
How silly! All corpses are
laid out with flowers and candles!
382
00:26:53,475 --> 00:26:56,420
It's custom. If I knew
you'd be so shocked, ...
383
00:26:56,420 --> 00:26:58,019
... I'd have closed the door!
384
00:26:58,019 --> 00:26:59,844
- I'm so sorry.
- Who is she?
385
00:26:59,844 --> 00:27:00,995
- That woman?
- Yes.
386
00:27:00,995 --> 00:27:02,180
It's my wife.
387
00:27:02,180 --> 00:27:04,485
She died yesterday, poor woman.
388
00:27:04,485 --> 00:27:06,021
- Your wife?
- Yes.
389
00:27:06,021 --> 00:27:09,541
You wanted to make love with
your wife's corpse in the house?
390
00:27:09,541 --> 00:27:11,172
So? What's wrong with it?
391
00:27:11,172 --> 00:27:13,726
Who dies sleeps, and who remains behind lives!
392
00:27:14,022 --> 00:27:16,194
Or so the poets say!
393
00:27:16,678 --> 00:27:18,982
You are crazy! Help me!
394
00:27:18,982 --> 00:27:21,478
Come here! Don't spoil everything!
395
00:27:21,478 --> 00:27:23,750
You're crazy! With your wife's corpse...
396
00:27:23,750 --> 00:27:26,214
I understand! You think I killed her!
397
00:27:26,214 --> 00:27:31,559
You know what happened?
She ate too much pasta ...
398
00:27:31,559 --> 00:27:34,952
... and died of indigestion.
I told her, don't eat so much!
399
00:27:34,952 --> 00:27:38,408
She told me, I don't care,
I don't care! See what happened?
400
00:27:38,408 --> 00:27:40,351
I couldn't even kill a fly!
401
00:27:41,129 --> 00:27:43,689
You know what people call me?
Lanfranco the clean.
402
00:27:43,689 --> 00:27:45,290
Because I'm the only clean one here.
403
00:27:45,290 --> 00:27:49,034
Come here! Don't worry about the corpse!
404
00:27:49,034 --> 00:27:50,921
If I don't care about
her, why should you?
405
00:27:51,946 --> 00:27:54,858
Oh God! A corpse! Help me!
406
00:27:54,858 --> 00:27:56,201
Help me!
407
00:27:59,114 --> 00:28:01,319
Bitch!
408
00:28:06,528 --> 00:28:09,388
Even in death you ruin my life, eh?
409
00:28:09,388 --> 00:28:11,527
Go to hell twice!
410
00:28:17,345 --> 00:28:19,020
- Conigliero!
- Yes! I'm here!
411
00:28:19,021 --> 00:28:21,326
Conigliero, would we get
our guests some armchairs ...
412
00:28:21,326 --> 00:28:23,629
... so that they can sit at our table?
413
00:28:23,629 --> 00:28:25,478
Thank you! That's very nice of you!
414
00:28:25,479 --> 00:28:28,302
This is a classroom! We're
conducting an oral exam here!
415
00:28:28,302 --> 00:28:29,486
Fuck!
416
00:28:29,486 --> 00:28:30,734
I apologize, my lady.
417
00:28:30,734 --> 00:28:32,976
Stand back! Stand back!
418
00:28:32,976 --> 00:28:35,567
No smoking in here!
419
00:28:35,567 --> 00:28:36,877
Here! No smoking!
420
00:28:41,537 --> 00:28:46,636
Sometimes a prostitute
can help a family man, too.
421
00:28:47,792 --> 00:28:49,037
That's a good thing.
422
00:28:49,426 --> 00:28:51,901
One day I was called
to go to a secretarial school.
423
00:29:00,687 --> 00:29:05,130
What a nice ass! What a pretty woman!
424
00:29:10,100 --> 00:29:12,595
Open up, and show me your breasts!
425
00:29:12,595 --> 00:29:14,580
Turn around.
426
00:29:14,580 --> 00:29:18,159
How beautiful. Please walk.
427
00:29:23,061 --> 00:29:27,698
You're too ugly! Go away!
428
00:29:30,134 --> 00:29:35,185
This is nice. You're a cute one!
429
00:29:37,783 --> 00:29:38,766
Nice legs!
430
00:29:46,808 --> 00:29:52,353
You again! Go away!
I need beautiful women! Go away!
431
00:29:53,305 --> 00:29:55,522
Oh yes, the case of the... of the...
432
00:29:55,523 --> 00:29:57,517
The homosexual man.
433
00:29:57,817 --> 00:29:59,058
Ah... the homosexual man.
434
00:29:59,258 --> 00:30:01,593
That's what Mister Rossi thought.
435
00:30:02,297 --> 00:30:03,610
Was he...?
436
00:30:03,610 --> 00:30:05,371
Not him, his son, Father.
437
00:30:05,371 --> 00:30:06,843
Father and son?
438
00:30:06,843 --> 00:30:10,203
No, the son was gay.
Father, can we go on?
439
00:30:10,203 --> 00:30:11,547
Please go on.
440
00:30:11,547 --> 00:30:15,932
The father was desperate because
his son wasn't attracted to women.
441
00:30:15,932 --> 00:30:17,689
That's how it seemed.
442
00:30:18,652 --> 00:30:20,790
Come, come Miss! Come!
443
00:30:21,147 --> 00:30:25,661
See? I employ only special secretaries.
444
00:30:25,661 --> 00:30:29,918
But that's not enough. I need
a serious professional like you.
445
00:30:29,918 --> 00:30:32,221
My son Carletto is 23 years old, ...
446
00:30:32,221 --> 00:30:36,019
... and all the boys his age have
already had hundreds of experiences.
447
00:30:36,094 --> 00:30:37,085
He hasn't had any!
448
00:30:37,085 --> 00:30:39,198
How can you be so sure?
449
00:30:39,198 --> 00:30:40,894
It's something a father feels.
450
00:30:40,894 --> 00:30:43,263
I actually hit him to
make him take a woman, look!
451
00:30:43,263 --> 00:30:45,310
All I got was an injured my hand!
452
00:30:45,310 --> 00:30:48,660
Come to the studio to see where Carletto works.
453
00:30:51,792 --> 00:30:54,048
I suspect the furnishings were your idea.
454
00:30:54,048 --> 00:30:58,456
Yes! Everything must remind him of
sex. I selected these furnishings myself!
455
00:31:00,416 --> 00:31:03,352
See? Nothing. Come on girls!
456
00:31:03,617 --> 00:31:08,257
Jump on him!
Attack him like an armed combat!
457
00:31:08,257 --> 00:31:10,978
Use your knives, use your bombs!
458
00:31:10,978 --> 00:31:12,931
Grab him! Hold him down!
459
00:31:12,931 --> 00:31:15,967
His trousers! Get his trousers!
460
00:31:15,968 --> 00:31:18,107
- Bad girls!
- He ran away!
461
00:31:19,171 --> 00:31:20,547
You write:
462
00:31:20,547 --> 00:31:24,291
"I was able to cure the boy with trickery.
463
00:31:24,291 --> 00:31:26,724
"I wore mens' clothing."
464
00:31:26,724 --> 00:31:29,220
What inspired you to do that?
465
00:31:29,220 --> 00:31:31,909
It was intuition
more than an inspiration.
466
00:31:31,909 --> 00:31:34,469
I had read something about it ...
467
00:31:34,469 --> 00:31:38,821
... and remembered a colleague
who had a similar case in the past.
468
00:31:39,521 --> 00:31:42,694
So, you were wearing mens' clothes, ...
469
00:31:42,694 --> 00:31:46,022
... with the girl... er, the boy...,
470
00:31:46,022 --> 00:31:50,879
... and what... what happened?
I don't see where this is going, Miss!
471
00:33:03,204 --> 00:33:06,152
He could only do something with
a woman wearing mens' clothes.
472
00:33:07,368 --> 00:33:11,205
Well, usually these are
the behavior of psycho...
473
00:33:11,206 --> 00:33:12,560
Psychopaths.
474
00:33:13,529 --> 00:33:14,587
Thank you.
475
00:33:16,305 --> 00:33:18,094
But... thank you.
476
00:33:18,929 --> 00:33:23,984
But you said that the... that this was factual...
477
00:33:24,842 --> 00:33:26,549
- I said it was.
- I see.
478
00:33:27,335 --> 00:33:29,075
Come in! Come in!
479
00:33:29,075 --> 00:33:33,003
I want a masculine woman!
Put the hat on!
480
00:33:33,460 --> 00:33:35,220
Good! Bravo!
481
00:33:35,220 --> 00:33:36,884
The second one! Come in!
Come in!
482
00:33:36,884 --> 00:33:38,313
That's it...
483
00:33:39,349 --> 00:33:42,772
She's quite manly! Take it, take it!
484
00:33:42,772 --> 00:33:46,864
Smoke! Come on, smoke it!
485
00:33:46,865 --> 00:33:48,737
Bravo! Go!
486
00:33:49,237 --> 00:33:53,302
The boxing girl! Come on, punch me!
487
00:33:53,302 --> 00:33:55,790
Go, go! Very good!
488
00:33:58,199 --> 00:34:00,686
- Let's go!
- She packs a punch! Let's go!
489
00:34:01,287 --> 00:34:02,601
It wasn't my fault.
490
00:34:02,602 --> 00:34:04,247
It was the father's.
491
00:34:04,248 --> 00:34:06,135
He was too eager for his son's recovery.
492
00:34:06,136 --> 00:34:11,089
He made all his secretaries wear mens' clothes.
493
00:34:15,801 --> 00:34:17,011
Don't move!
494
00:34:17,465 --> 00:34:18,578
I said don't move!
495
00:34:19,064 --> 00:34:20,691
Yes, yes, yes!
496
00:34:21,337 --> 00:34:23,545
I like this game!
497
00:34:23,545 --> 00:34:25,881
Since then, Carletto
has taken advantage of it.
498
00:34:25,881 --> 00:34:29,114
He liked his father's idea so much, ...
499
00:34:29,114 --> 00:34:32,347
... that after a few days he hired
other secretaries for himself.
500
00:34:32,347 --> 00:34:35,387
He ran wild! Yes, he ran wild!
501
00:34:35,387 --> 00:34:38,459
His father should be happy now!
502
00:34:38,459 --> 00:34:40,283
His son was cured!
503
00:34:40,283 --> 00:34:42,940
- And from then on, he could enjoy...
- The stone!
504
00:34:42,940 --> 00:34:44,636
... sex in a normal way!
505
00:34:44,636 --> 00:34:45,501
The stone!
506
00:34:45,501 --> 00:34:46,588
- The stone, madam!
- What about the stone?
507
00:34:46,588 --> 00:34:48,572
The stone in your hand, madam!
508
00:34:48,572 --> 00:34:50,140
You've been hitting my
hand with it for some time!
509
00:34:50,140 --> 00:34:51,165
I apologize.
510
00:34:51,165 --> 00:34:52,856
Damn, she raised quite a bruise!
511
00:34:53,854 --> 00:34:55,421
The son had completely recovered.
512
00:34:55,421 --> 00:34:57,374
But his father was sick.
513
00:34:57,374 --> 00:34:59,902
A few weeks later, his lawyer called me.
514
00:34:59,902 --> 00:35:01,918
He was desperate.
515
00:35:01,918 --> 00:35:03,478
He cried like a baby.
516
00:35:09,087 --> 00:35:10,712
What happened?
517
00:35:11,359 --> 00:35:13,279
What do you mean what happened?
518
00:35:13,279 --> 00:35:14,943
I'm ruined! A desperate man!
519
00:35:14,943 --> 00:35:17,376
My son has become a monster! Look!
520
00:35:17,376 --> 00:35:19,776
Look what your idea has done to me!
521
00:35:19,776 --> 00:35:22,497
Look what has happened
to these two poor girls!
522
00:35:22,497 --> 00:35:24,385
And they're not the only ones!
523
00:35:43,011 --> 00:35:46,676
It looks like they got it in the end, Father!
524
00:35:47,076 --> 00:35:48,986
Professor!
525
00:35:50,372 --> 00:35:52,387
I feel sick!
526
00:35:52,387 --> 00:35:54,657
I feel sick too!
527
00:35:54,757 --> 00:35:56,741
I feel sick for those poor girls!
528
00:35:56,741 --> 00:35:59,229
I apologize! If we have
to listen, let's get on with it!
529
00:36:01,086 --> 00:36:04,902
Can I get in? Is it true that
a hooker is getting a degree?
530
00:36:04,902 --> 00:36:08,987
Let me in, come on!
531
00:36:09,287 --> 00:36:12,134
One of my colleagues is
getting a degree! Let me in!
532
00:36:14,387 --> 00:36:15,600
Are you feeling me up?
533
00:36:18,791 --> 00:36:20,963
Quiet! Quiet!
534
00:36:25,092 --> 00:36:26,715
Conigliero, make them shut up!
535
00:36:34,921 --> 00:36:37,439
You're such an asshole!
536
00:36:42,623 --> 00:36:44,227
Please continue, Miss.
537
00:36:44,327 --> 00:36:46,635
As I said, anything can happen.
538
00:36:46,635 --> 00:36:48,064
It's a job with a lot of variety.
539
00:37:03,105 --> 00:37:04,037
Good evening.
540
00:37:04,137 --> 00:37:05,667
Come in, quickly!
541
00:37:11,118 --> 00:37:12,641
Did you just phone me a few minutes ago?
542
00:37:12,741 --> 00:37:14,339
Yes, that was me.
543
00:37:14,639 --> 00:37:17,222
I called you on the phone...
544
00:37:26,124 --> 00:37:27,401
Come in.
545
00:37:27,984 --> 00:37:30,158
- Me?
- Yes...
546
00:37:37,970 --> 00:37:39,113
Sorry!
547
00:37:41,585 --> 00:37:43,687
You're so ugly!
548
00:37:45,262 --> 00:37:46,978
That makes you laugh, to be called ugly?
549
00:37:47,078 --> 00:37:51,037
No, I laugh because everybody thinks
so. I'm not ugly, I just have character.
550
00:37:53,683 --> 00:37:55,310
You mean me?
551
00:37:56,187 --> 00:37:58,796
What are you looking at?
Have I done something?
552
00:37:59,612 --> 00:38:01,530
I'm looking at your large bulge!
553
00:38:04,373 --> 00:38:05,234
Well, yes...
554
00:38:05,773 --> 00:38:09,220
Tell me, would you
like to do something?
555
00:38:09,620 --> 00:38:11,656
You're quite an animal, Miss!
556
00:38:11,956 --> 00:38:14,126
I'm to take that
as a compliment, no?
557
00:38:14,127 --> 00:38:15,341
Yes!
558
00:38:17,449 --> 00:38:20,086
So, would you like to get down to business?
559
00:38:20,086 --> 00:38:21,461
Bad boy!
560
00:38:22,903 --> 00:38:26,006
But you'll have to be quick,
I have another appointment.
561
00:38:26,006 --> 00:38:28,527
Yes, sure! I'll be quick!
562
00:38:29,815 --> 00:38:31,539
Then come on, quickly!
563
00:38:33,720 --> 00:38:36,287
I apologize for touching you, Miss.
I'll be quick.
564
00:38:44,437 --> 00:38:45,579
All done!
565
00:38:47,610 --> 00:38:50,106
I told you to be quick, but that was too quick!
566
00:38:50,107 --> 00:38:52,805
I couldn't control myself, but
if you don't mind, I'll try again.
567
00:38:53,710 --> 00:38:55,339
Don't tell me you've already recovered...
568
00:38:55,340 --> 00:38:56,951
Touch it if you don't believe me.
569
00:38:59,571 --> 00:39:01,082
Are you a man or a wild baboon?
570
00:39:01,082 --> 00:39:03,320
Do you think I'm a baboon?
571
00:39:03,932 --> 00:39:05,786
I just thought I'd ask.
572
00:39:07,216 --> 00:39:08,460
Do it...
573
00:39:10,357 --> 00:39:13,404
Miss, I apologize for lying on top of you ....
574
00:39:13,405 --> 00:39:15,215
... but I don't know any other way.
575
00:39:16,637 --> 00:39:20,254
Just a moment. I don't mind
making love with an ugly man like you, ...
576
00:39:20,254 --> 00:39:21,425
... but do you have my money?
577
00:39:21,725 --> 00:39:23,469
Otherwise I'll get quite angry!
578
00:39:23,569 --> 00:39:24,715
Of course!
579
00:39:24,815 --> 00:39:25,885
Are you sure?
580
00:39:25,886 --> 00:39:27,510
Sure, it's in my jacket.
581
00:39:27,970 --> 00:39:29,950
Okay, I trust you.
582
00:39:29,951 --> 00:39:32,895
You shouldn't distrust me and say I'm ugly ...
583
00:39:32,895 --> 00:39:35,284
... because I'm a really
a nice guy and a gentleman.
584
00:39:35,384 --> 00:39:37,180
- May I kiss you?
- No.
585
00:39:37,280 --> 00:39:38,709
Then I'll be quick.
586
00:39:43,229 --> 00:39:44,972
Ah! I've conquered you again!
587
00:39:48,576 --> 00:39:51,169
I've certainly never met anyone like you before.
588
00:39:51,170 --> 00:39:52,666
I just can't control it. Should I try again?
589
00:39:52,866 --> 00:39:54,393
No, have mercy!
590
00:39:54,810 --> 00:39:58,687
It's late.
I told you I have another appointment.
591
00:40:03,523 --> 00:40:05,325
Now give me the money, young man!
592
00:40:05,326 --> 00:40:06,655
Yes, sure!
593
00:40:07,291 --> 00:40:08,506
Excuse me.
594
00:40:10,051 --> 00:40:12,144
- You didn't forgot it, did you?
- Of course not.
595
00:40:13,708 --> 00:40:15,190
Here... this is for you.
596
00:40:17,240 --> 00:40:18,522
Count it.
597
00:40:25,349 --> 00:40:26,818
500.000 lire ?!
598
00:40:26,819 --> 00:40:28,145
Yes... 500.000 lire!
599
00:40:30,021 --> 00:40:31,678
Is this a joke?
600
00:40:33,979 --> 00:40:34,882
Hey... is this money real?
601
00:40:34,883 --> 00:40:38,325
I'm a gentleman, Miss.
I would never play such a trick.
602
00:40:40,679 --> 00:40:42,407
So this is all for me?
603
00:40:42,408 --> 00:40:43,962
Of course... it's yours!
604
00:40:46,327 --> 00:40:48,805
You're extraordinary!
605
00:40:49,005 --> 00:40:50,944
And you're handsome!
606
00:40:51,144 --> 00:40:53,288
Even the way you speak becomes you!
607
00:40:53,589 --> 00:40:54,789
And so generous...
608
00:40:55,388 --> 00:40:56,521
Where are you from?
609
00:40:56,521 --> 00:40:58,147
From Avellino, Miss.
610
00:40:58,857 --> 00:41:03,177
That's a coincidence!
I'm from Avellino too!
611
00:41:03,178 --> 00:41:04,842
My mother still lives there!
612
00:41:04,843 --> 00:41:06,846
Yes, I know your mother. She's a good woman.
613
00:41:07,146 --> 00:41:08,711
You know my mother?
614
00:41:08,712 --> 00:41:11,114
Yes! When she heard I was going to Rome, ...
615
00:41:11,114 --> 00:41:13,355
... she asked if I could give you this 500.000 lire ...
616
00:41:13,355 --> 00:41:15,499
... because the mail service is on strike.
617
00:41:15,499 --> 00:41:17,771
I said I would do it and
she gave me your address.
618
00:41:17,771 --> 00:41:22,893
I have to go now. You've been very
nice to me, even though you didn't have to.
619
00:41:22,894 --> 00:41:25,508
I'd have given you the money
anyway, because I'm a gentleman.
620
00:41:25,509 --> 00:41:27,240
A simple thank you would have been enough.
621
00:41:27,540 --> 00:41:30,505
Have I got everything?
I won't tell your mother about this.
622
00:41:32,274 --> 00:41:33,831
Good evening.
623
00:41:41,934 --> 00:41:43,723
Conigliero! Are we in a market-place?
624
00:41:46,197 --> 00:41:48,087
Get out!
625
00:41:50,088 --> 00:41:54,511
We'll wind up like Sweden.
Don't you agree, Father?
626
00:41:55,280 --> 00:41:56,969
Tell me something, Miss.
627
00:41:57,169 --> 00:41:59,237
Did you have orgasms with your clients?
628
00:41:59,537 --> 00:42:03,494
During the 200 sexual encounters,
I had an orgasm three or four times.
629
00:42:03,694 --> 00:42:05,118
I had them with my boyfriend.
630
00:43:17,858 --> 00:43:19,651
In order to make 100.000 lire, ...
631
00:43:19,652 --> 00:43:21,775
... you need to have a certain kind of client.
632
00:43:21,875 --> 00:43:24,346
- You said 100.000?
- Yes.
633
00:43:24,952 --> 00:43:26,129
Did you hear that?
634
00:43:26,515 --> 00:43:29,608
And we spend our lives working at a desk!
635
00:43:30,108 --> 00:43:35,152
Why are you so angry? Do you think
that we should all go to work as prostitutes?
636
00:43:35,480 --> 00:43:38,425
We all have our jobs to do, no?
Please continue...
637
00:43:38,741 --> 00:43:41,189
We have to use our advantage, my dear Professor.
638
00:43:41,289 --> 00:43:43,505
Men only want one thing.
639
00:43:43,605 --> 00:43:45,931
Luckily, we women have it!
640
00:43:46,258 --> 00:43:47,938
And you love it, eh?
641
00:43:48,439 --> 00:43:49,639
Mine, too...
642
00:43:51,827 --> 00:43:53,847
Please, ladies, that's evil...
643
00:43:53,848 --> 00:43:55,346
I'll say what I want to!
644
00:43:55,446 --> 00:43:57,147
Let's move on... what were you saying?
645
00:43:57,148 --> 00:44:01,579
In order to earn this money,
you need to call special agencies.
646
00:44:03,704 --> 00:44:05,416
Phone calls...
647
00:44:06,016 --> 00:44:08,256
Companies that pose as modeling agencies.
648
00:44:08,256 --> 00:44:11,712
Or you can make appointments
through the concierge at major hotels .
649
00:44:11,713 --> 00:44:14,647
This is called "home service."
650
00:44:21,346 --> 00:44:22,508
It's my wife!
651
00:44:28,419 --> 00:44:32,347
I apologize if I'm back earlier,
but the evening was very boring.
652
00:44:34,168 --> 00:44:35,556
Is this your lover or a whore?
653
00:44:35,556 --> 00:44:36,733
A whore.
654
00:44:37,301 --> 00:44:39,675
They're always the best.
655
00:44:39,696 --> 00:44:41,239
Good night.
656
00:44:44,612 --> 00:44:46,747
Please, silence in the court!
657
00:44:47,141 --> 00:44:48,734
Are you a ....
658
00:44:49,654 --> 00:44:51,973
Sometimes I sent the clients away.
659
00:44:51,973 --> 00:44:55,078
This happened when they
were like others I'd already studied.
660
00:44:55,079 --> 00:44:59,388
If the man seemed to be an interesting
case, I admitted him to my home.
661
00:45:06,504 --> 00:45:07,532
Oh my God!
662
00:45:07,939 --> 00:45:09,632
You'll be the first of your kind
that I've made love to for my study.
663
00:45:09,633 --> 00:45:11,241
Aren't you happy to see me?
664
00:45:11,242 --> 00:45:13,360
I just got out of the asylum,
and I want to fuck you!
665
00:45:14,665 --> 00:45:16,901
Come in and close the door.
666
00:45:20,866 --> 00:45:22,554
What a nice house!
667
00:45:22,854 --> 00:45:24,000
Come in!
668
00:45:24,458 --> 00:45:25,766
I'm ready!
669
00:45:27,275 --> 00:45:29,738
Beautiful! Beautiful!
You're so very beautiful!
670
00:45:29,738 --> 00:45:32,908
Beautiful! Beautiful! Beautiful!
671
00:45:35,039 --> 00:45:36,807
So, what are we going to do?
672
00:45:36,907 --> 00:45:38,085
You're so beautiful!
673
00:45:39,420 --> 00:45:42,080
You know, I have to tell you something.
674
00:45:42,580 --> 00:45:45,014
I've never had a woman!
675
00:45:46,756 --> 00:45:48,824
Don't tell me it's your
first time with a woman!
676
00:45:48,924 --> 00:45:50,405
And a beautiful one!
677
00:45:50,889 --> 00:45:52,481
Why have you waited so long?
678
00:45:52,581 --> 00:45:55,501
I was looking for someone like you!
But I've never met one!
679
00:45:55,502 --> 00:45:59,651
There were the nurses in the asylum,
but I never saw them naked.
680
00:46:00,235 --> 00:46:02,551
- Are you all better now?
- Yes!
681
00:46:03,979 --> 00:46:05,435
Then, come here.
682
00:46:06,959 --> 00:46:09,535
No! No! I won't come!
683
00:46:09,835 --> 00:46:10,901
Why?
684
00:46:10,902 --> 00:46:12,772
Because you don't have a penis!
685
00:46:21,069 --> 00:46:24,037
Where's my friend? The hooker.
686
00:46:24,038 --> 00:46:25,801
She must be in Caracalla!
687
00:46:26,001 --> 00:46:30,481
I'm sorry! I've been looking for her everywhere!
688
00:46:30,482 --> 00:46:32,424
She's obviously a dimwit!
What a mess!
689
00:46:33,401 --> 00:46:35,464
Quiet! Now!
690
00:46:40,627 --> 00:46:41,506
It's the stone!
691
00:46:41,906 --> 00:46:43,115
That fucking stone again!
692
00:46:44,331 --> 00:46:46,520
That was a good joke!
[i.e. sesso=sex sasso=stone]
693
00:46:48,608 --> 00:46:51,140
Men only know how to make crude jokes.
694
00:46:53,405 --> 00:46:55,313
What do you want?
695
00:46:55,926 --> 00:46:57,314
What does he want?
696
00:47:01,078 --> 00:47:03,526
Hey, Rodolfo Valentino,
are you from Castellaneta?
697
00:47:03,926 --> 00:47:05,654
From Cerignola?
698
00:47:05,655 --> 00:47:07,766
I'm a Venetian, from Chioggia.
699
00:47:07,767 --> 00:47:09,250
Ah... just a jerk.
700
00:47:09,450 --> 00:47:11,379
- Conigliero!
- Yes, professor.
701
00:47:11,380 --> 00:47:15,607
Are we on some kind of TV program?
Are we going to dance the tango now?
702
00:47:16,047 --> 00:47:18,465
Go on with the tango... with the exam!
703
00:47:23,517 --> 00:47:26,405
Ladies and gentlemen, your attention please.
This is the last time I'll say this!
704
00:47:28,209 --> 00:47:30,609
This classroom is not a city square!
705
00:47:30,809 --> 00:47:32,246
It's not a market-place!
706
00:47:32,346 --> 00:47:33,539
It's not a sports stadium!
707
00:47:34,265 --> 00:47:37,702
During this girl's examination, ...
708
00:47:38,602 --> 00:47:40,850
... if this thesis is interrupted again, ...
709
00:47:41,150 --> 00:47:47,095
... I personally will make an example of him,
take him by the neck, ...
710
00:47:47,995 --> 00:47:49,908
... and kick his ass!
711
00:47:51,091 --> 00:47:54,090
My apologies ladies, I didn't
mean to say ass, but bottom.
712
00:47:55,385 --> 00:47:57,479
- Conigliero!
- Coming! I'm here now...
713
00:47:57,621 --> 00:47:59,893
- Close the door!
- I just closed it, Professor.
714
00:48:00,061 --> 00:48:01,484
I don't care, close it again!
715
00:48:03,229 --> 00:48:05,297
I'm usually nice, but when I get angry...
716
00:48:07,527 --> 00:48:08,524
Please...
717
00:48:08,594 --> 00:48:12,450
Home service sometimes begins
with couples, but ends with groups.
718
00:48:12,550 --> 00:48:15,054
You mean... an orgy!
719
00:48:15,055 --> 00:48:17,115
We don't use the word orgy anymore.
720
00:48:17,116 --> 00:48:18,163
Really?
721
00:48:18,164 --> 00:48:19,692
It has a bad connotation.
722
00:48:19,967 --> 00:48:24,406
It's only used by common people to
malign the sexual activities of the wealthy.
723
00:48:25,219 --> 00:48:27,423
The upper classes have moved on.
724
00:48:27,424 --> 00:48:30,384
They use modern terms,
sometimes ones they've made up.
725
00:48:30,784 --> 00:48:33,037
For example, getting it on, ...
726
00:48:33,437 --> 00:48:34,453
... group love, ...
727
00:48:34,653 --> 00:48:35,833
... having a party, ...
728
00:48:36,033 --> 00:48:39,180
... making a big, tangled pile, ...
729
00:48:39,480 --> 00:48:40,510
... in which I was once injured ...
730
00:48:40,511 --> 00:48:41,686
You should have been on top!
731
00:48:42,690 --> 00:48:44,546
These are peculiar words.
732
00:48:45,306 --> 00:48:50,257
Proceed, Miss.
Tell us the tale of Lucio, the homosexual at the hotel.
733
00:48:52,115 --> 00:48:54,131
Excuse me, where's the toilet?
734
00:48:54,231 --> 00:48:57,044
Toilet? We call it the restroom!
735
00:48:57,045 --> 00:49:00,260
You can't get lost in Italy.
It's always straight ahead on the right.
736
00:49:00,261 --> 00:49:02,396
- Go and take care of everything!
- Thank you!
737
00:49:02,397 --> 00:49:03,668
Same to you.
738
00:49:04,869 --> 00:49:05,869
Well!
739
00:49:11,357 --> 00:49:14,337
So Lucio, you're still single, aren't you?
740
00:49:14,437 --> 00:49:15,486
Yes, Madam.
741
00:49:15,487 --> 00:49:17,198
You're looking for another young boy.
742
00:49:17,298 --> 00:49:18,412
Unfortunately.
743
00:49:18,374 --> 00:49:20,691
You're such a bad boy!
744
00:49:20,692 --> 00:49:24,350
Yes! But Cesarino was nice and good!
745
00:49:24,351 --> 00:49:27,527
- So nice!
- Why did you break up with him?
746
00:49:27,911 --> 00:49:30,268
Well, in strictest confidence, Madam, ...
747
00:49:30,269 --> 00:49:34,046
... Cesarino was sterile.
He couldn't have children.
748
00:49:35,036 --> 00:49:36,632
- Lucio!
- I'm right here!
749
00:49:37,388 --> 00:49:40,829
Bravo, Lucio!
Everything must be ready in ten minutes.
750
00:49:40,929 --> 00:49:42,793
And bring champagne to my room!
751
00:49:42,794 --> 00:49:44,454
As usual, your honor!
752
00:49:44,554 --> 00:49:47,826
All I need is here, in my suitcase!
753
00:49:47,926 --> 00:49:49,990
It's just a large hand bag, your honor.
754
00:49:50,090 --> 00:49:51,754
They make everything smaller nowadays, eh?
755
00:49:51,754 --> 00:49:54,853
I carry my suitcase for my...
756
00:49:55,850 --> 00:49:58,315
- ... extra-parliamentary adventures!
- Good!
757
00:49:58,315 --> 00:49:59,556
I'm so excited today!
758
00:50:04,448 --> 00:50:07,164
My room, my key? What's the number?
759
00:50:07,165 --> 00:50:09,516
Always the same room: 223.
760
00:50:09,517 --> 00:50:11,596
Bravo! You have a good memory!
761
00:50:11,697 --> 00:50:14,016
And if someone calls, I'm not available?
762
00:50:14,116 --> 00:50:15,009
Of course.
763
00:50:15,109 --> 00:50:17,356
- I'm in Tokyo.
- Where?
764
00:50:17,902 --> 00:50:20,177
- In Tokyo!
- Tokyo...
765
00:50:22,046 --> 00:50:23,908
You can call it Tokyo.
766
00:50:41,937 --> 00:50:43,608
- How much?
- 1.000 lire.
767
00:50:45,349 --> 00:50:47,041
- Thank you, Miss.
- You're welcome.
768
00:51:02,322 --> 00:51:03,602
What kind of man is he?
769
00:51:03,603 --> 00:51:05,512
He's a Member of the Parliament.
770
00:51:06,131 --> 00:51:08,801
And he has the best room in the hotel.
771
00:51:10,612 --> 00:51:15,000
He gives great tips.
So behave yourself accordingly!
772
00:51:15,636 --> 00:51:17,093
And don't forget about me.
773
00:51:17,393 --> 00:51:20,029
- What's his room number?
- 223.
774
00:51:25,629 --> 00:51:27,165
Eau de parfum!
775
00:51:28,605 --> 00:51:30,467
It's always good to use some perfume!
776
00:51:37,720 --> 00:51:38,926
I'm coming!
777
00:51:39,352 --> 00:51:40,911
You look gorgeous!
778
00:51:41,011 --> 00:51:42,118
I'm coming!
779
00:51:50,009 --> 00:51:53,012
Who are you? Botticelli's Venus?
780
00:51:53,112 --> 00:51:54,637
Please, come in.
781
00:51:54,937 --> 00:51:58,883
Wonderful! Just wonderful!
782
00:52:00,026 --> 00:52:01,355
Beautiful!
783
00:52:02,422 --> 00:52:03,596
Divine!
784
00:52:04,749 --> 00:52:06,287
- Thank you, your honor.
- No!
785
00:52:06,387 --> 00:52:07,491
Don't call me "your honor".
786
00:52:07,591 --> 00:52:08,778
Call me Totuccio.
787
00:52:08,878 --> 00:52:12,108
In my bedroom you may call me Totuccio!
788
00:52:13,063 --> 00:52:14,964
It's one of my pet names!
789
00:52:15,164 --> 00:52:16,684
What would you like to do, Totuccio?
790
00:52:16,685 --> 00:52:18,585
What would I like to do?
What kind of question is that?
791
00:52:18,586 --> 00:52:20,136
What would I like to do?
792
00:52:21,605 --> 00:52:22,899
Everything!
793
00:52:23,517 --> 00:52:25,162
Let me look at you!
794
00:52:26,265 --> 00:52:27,565
Perfect!
795
00:52:27,666 --> 00:52:32,774
By my grandmother, the Senator
was right in telling me to call you!
796
00:52:33,022 --> 00:52:34,728
When I see a woman like you...
797
00:52:35,990 --> 00:52:38,327
... I regret my 50 years of marriage!
798
00:52:38,328 --> 00:52:39,775
- 50 years?!
- Yes!
799
00:52:39,775 --> 00:52:41,315
Two wives.
800
00:52:42,259 --> 00:52:46,816
I tell you in confidence,
I destroyed the first one with love!
801
00:52:46,817 --> 00:52:48,736
She died in bed.
802
00:52:48,937 --> 00:52:50,230
And the second one?
803
00:52:50,904 --> 00:52:53,920
I keep the second on a strict diet!
804
00:52:53,921 --> 00:52:56,969
Four times per year: Autumn,
Winter, Spring and Summer!
805
00:52:57,844 --> 00:52:59,352
And only on odd days.
806
00:52:59,402 --> 00:53:00,689
Does she understand?
807
00:53:00,789 --> 00:53:02,631
I don't care if she understands!
I just don't give it to her!
808
00:53:02,705 --> 00:53:03,818
Austerity!
809
00:53:05,489 --> 00:53:06,783
It's my kidneys!
810
00:53:06,986 --> 00:53:08,085
Thank you!
811
00:53:09,354 --> 00:53:13,431
- Is she jealous, Totuccio?
- She threatens me with murder!
812
00:53:13,566 --> 00:53:16,151
And yes, she thinks I cheat on her.
813
00:53:16,551 --> 00:53:19,400
But I've always cheated on her!
814
00:53:19,900 --> 00:53:21,307
Ever since we got married.
815
00:53:21,507 --> 00:53:23,246
Everybody calls me 'The Cheater'!
816
00:53:29,840 --> 00:53:31,561
That crazy...
817
00:53:31,961 --> 00:53:33,835
Ah, the bitch from room 220!
818
00:53:42,283 --> 00:53:43,492
How cute!
819
00:53:51,243 --> 00:53:52,952
For you!
820
00:53:57,853 --> 00:54:00,853
- And for you!
- Thank you!
821
00:54:05,269 --> 00:54:06,748
May I?
822
00:54:07,562 --> 00:54:09,383
One and two!
823
00:54:10,750 --> 00:54:12,063
Come in!
824
00:54:14,429 --> 00:54:16,142
- Greetings, your honor!
- Ciao!
825
00:54:16,143 --> 00:54:17,349
It's Lucio.
826
00:54:22,290 --> 00:54:23,501
Just like Lucio!
827
00:54:24,655 --> 00:54:28,908
Bravo! Good! Great!
Lucio is fantastic!
828
00:54:28,908 --> 00:54:30,762
Let's see what you brought.
829
00:54:30,828 --> 00:54:33,099
Don Gesualdo of 1919?!
830
00:54:33,099 --> 00:54:34,636
Italian champagne!
831
00:54:34,636 --> 00:54:36,301
That's what we need!
832
00:54:36,301 --> 00:54:38,602
- Uncork it, my young friend!
- Yes!
833
00:54:38,765 --> 00:54:41,949
Take off your clothes and get into bed!
834
00:54:42,449 --> 00:54:46,237
I'll bring you the nectar of the gods!
835
00:54:46,238 --> 00:54:47,311
But what about him?
836
00:54:47,312 --> 00:54:49,806
Don't pay attention to
him! He's like your sister!
837
00:54:49,807 --> 00:54:50,902
Thank you, your honor!
838
00:54:53,163 --> 00:54:54,836
He doesn't care about women's bodies!
839
00:54:55,019 --> 00:54:58,864
I get sick looking at them!
They're like an alien species to me!
840
00:54:59,051 --> 00:55:00,259
So I don't attract you?
841
00:55:01,068 --> 00:55:03,180
It's true. I'm gay, Miss.
842
00:55:03,181 --> 00:55:04,587
How do you know?
843
00:55:04,652 --> 00:55:07,035
Well... I sleep with men!
844
00:55:12,689 --> 00:55:15,281
- Good morning Madame.
- I'm Director Angeletti's wife.
845
00:55:15,281 --> 00:55:16,721
- What's his room?
- 223.
846
00:55:16,721 --> 00:55:17,834
- Thank you!
- You're welcome!
847
00:55:19,923 --> 00:55:21,810
Madame! Madame, where are you going?
848
00:55:21,810 --> 00:55:24,396
Excuse me, my lady!
849
00:55:24,427 --> 00:55:25,688
- Call the Director!
- Yes!
850
00:55:25,689 --> 00:55:26,518
Madame!
851
00:55:26,818 --> 00:55:29,436
It must be the Senator asking about you!
852
00:55:31,303 --> 00:55:32,965
Hello? Who's speaking?
853
00:55:34,004 --> 00:55:35,075
What?
854
00:55:35,375 --> 00:55:36,457
Who?!
855
00:55:36,557 --> 00:55:37,600
My wife!
856
00:55:38,100 --> 00:55:39,028
Oh no!
857
00:55:39,029 --> 00:55:40,957
My wife's supposed to think I'm in Tokyo!
858
00:55:41,057 --> 00:55:42,656
Idiot! She's coming here?
859
00:55:42,956 --> 00:55:43,817
Oh God!
860
00:55:44,117 --> 00:55:45,962
Stop her, you fool!
861
00:55:46,062 --> 00:55:47,330
This is insane!
862
00:55:47,331 --> 00:55:49,206
I'm ruined! Finished!
863
00:55:49,207 --> 00:55:50,346
How did it happen?
864
00:55:50,347 --> 00:55:55,282
The stupid bellboy told
my wife I'm in room 223!
865
00:55:55,283 --> 00:55:56,676
What an asshole!
866
00:55:57,094 --> 00:55:58,099
What are we going to do?
867
00:55:58,119 --> 00:55:59,215
What are you going to do?
868
00:55:59,216 --> 00:56:00,247
What would you like to do?
869
00:56:00,248 --> 00:56:02,003
What are we going to do?
What are we going to do?
870
00:56:02,123 --> 00:56:03,102
I don't know!
871
00:56:03,502 --> 00:56:06,187
- Madame! Please, madame!
872
00:56:06,188 --> 00:56:07,700
- Where is he?
- There must be some mistake!
873
00:56:07,750 --> 00:56:09,672
Lucio, quick! I'm sorry, dear.
874
00:56:09,693 --> 00:56:12,950
Madame, you have to believe me.
Your husband is in Tokyo!
875
00:56:12,951 --> 00:56:13,692
Liar!
876
00:56:13,792 --> 00:56:15,379
Your honor, it's impossible!
877
00:56:15,380 --> 00:56:16,809
- Why?
- She's coming!
878
00:56:16,909 --> 00:56:20,836
Oh God! I'm ruined! She'll
tell everything in the Parliament!
879
00:56:21,022 --> 00:56:22,577
Let go of me, pimp!
880
00:56:22,578 --> 00:56:27,818
- Madame please!
- Let go or I'll break my umbrella over your head!
881
00:56:30,367 --> 00:56:31,731
- Let's pretend nothing happened.
- Okay.
882
00:56:32,032 --> 00:56:34,371
Aha! There's room 223!
883
00:56:34,471 --> 00:56:36,462
He won't escape this time!
884
00:56:39,051 --> 00:56:40,939
It would have been
better if he'd gone to Tokyo!
885
00:56:42,297 --> 00:56:44,084
Open, cheater!
886
00:56:45,148 --> 00:56:46,413
It's the peasant woman!
887
00:56:46,513 --> 00:56:48,198
We're trapped, Lucio!
888
00:56:48,199 --> 00:56:51,261
- It's the end of everything.
- Why don't you escape out the window, your honor?
889
00:56:51,262 --> 00:56:53,425
If I was brave enough, I'd do it!
890
00:56:53,625 --> 00:56:56,830
Open up, coward! I know you're in there!
891
00:56:56,831 --> 00:56:58,272
Fucking Member of Parliament!
892
00:56:59,422 --> 00:57:01,470
Wait! What if
I hide in the wardrobe?
893
00:57:01,471 --> 00:57:03,758
If your wife doesn't see you,
she'll search for you!
894
00:57:03,759 --> 00:57:06,687
Hey! What if Lucio pretends he's your wife...
895
00:57:06,688 --> 00:57:07,668
- Right!
- ... I mean, your husband!
896
00:57:07,742 --> 00:57:09,603
No, your honor... it's no time for jokes!
897
00:57:10,003 --> 00:57:11,810
Open or I'll break it down!
898
00:57:13,620 --> 00:57:15,649
Quick Lucio! Get undressed!
899
00:57:15,650 --> 00:57:18,239
You're not my kind of man,
and your wife is behind that door!
900
00:57:18,040 --> 00:57:19,047
If she sees us, she'll kill us!
901
00:57:19,048 --> 00:57:20,376
You're the only one who can save me!
902
00:57:23,177 --> 00:57:25,349
I know you're in there! I know it!
903
00:57:26,145 --> 00:57:28,053
Don't insist! Not for a million!
904
00:57:28,054 --> 00:57:29,546
Ask for anything you want!
905
00:57:30,046 --> 00:57:31,042
Anything at all?
906
00:57:31,043 --> 00:57:32,002
Yes! Anything at all!
907
00:57:32,003 --> 00:57:34,042
I want to marry Ignazio,
the night concierge.
908
00:57:34,210 --> 00:57:37,275
All right! I'll write a new law,
and put it up for a vote!
909
00:57:37,375 --> 00:57:38,906
We can get married in Sweden!
910
00:57:39,006 --> 00:57:42,231
I'll get in the wardrobe!
Don't open the door!
911
00:57:42,232 --> 00:57:44,860
I'll marry Ignazio! I'll marry Ignazio!
912
00:57:44,960 --> 00:57:46,732
Luckily, my trousseau is all prepared!
913
00:57:48,111 --> 00:57:48,980
Let's go!
914
00:57:49,380 --> 00:57:51,795
I'm very angry, Member of Parliament!
915
00:57:52,325 --> 00:57:55,057
- God forgives, I don't!
- What do you want, madame? No one is here!
916
00:57:55,217 --> 00:57:58,429
- Where's Totuccio?
- Totuccio? Is that your dog?
917
00:57:58,430 --> 00:58:01,366
No! He's an asshole and
if I find him, I'll kill him!
918
00:58:01,466 --> 00:58:03,650
That will be difficult, Madame.
919
00:58:03,750 --> 00:58:05,174
You think so?
920
00:58:05,175 --> 00:58:07,150
Yes! I've never seen anyone kill an asshole!
921
00:58:07,151 --> 00:58:08,751
- Have you, my dear?
- Never!
922
00:58:09,511 --> 00:58:10,479
Who are you?
923
00:58:10,480 --> 00:58:13,268
- Me?
- Why are you here at 223?
924
00:58:13,269 --> 00:58:15,888
I'm 223's husband!
925
00:58:16,367 --> 00:58:20,047
Lucio, I'm fed up with her.
Send her away and come to bed!
926
00:58:20,048 --> 00:58:25,267
You heard her? You'll have to leave!
I have to finish what you interrupted!
927
00:58:25,929 --> 00:58:27,528
So you're Lucio, eh?
928
00:58:27,628 --> 00:58:29,533
Yes... you don't like my name?
929
00:58:29,833 --> 00:58:30,929
A nice name!
930
00:58:31,029 --> 00:58:34,590
I was told that the waiter who brought
the champagne had the same name!
931
00:58:34,690 --> 00:58:36,502
Really? What a coincidence!
932
00:58:36,602 --> 00:58:39,953
Coincidence! I can see
there's champagne here too!
933
00:58:40,053 --> 00:58:41,450
Oh... another coincidence!
934
00:58:42,150 --> 00:58:44,931
- Would you care for a glass?
- I'd love to!
935
00:58:45,556 --> 00:58:50,171
Are we the only ones who are celebrating?
936
00:58:50,172 --> 00:58:53,324
I think someone is missing here!
937
00:58:53,324 --> 00:58:55,478
Madame stop with this drama!
938
00:58:56,332 --> 00:58:57,677
- Lucio?
- Yes?
939
00:58:57,677 --> 00:58:59,285
For the very last time, send her away!
940
00:58:59,286 --> 00:59:01,724
- Yes.
- Quick, send her away!
941
00:59:02,018 --> 00:59:06,189
You heard my wife?
I'm afraid I must get rude now!
942
00:59:07,982 --> 00:59:11,418
Open that wardrobe and let
my fucking husband out!
943
00:59:11,918 --> 00:59:14,407
Madame, I told you no one else is here!
944
00:59:14,607 --> 00:59:16,911
I count till 3, then I shoot!
945
00:59:16,911 --> 00:59:18,819
- One! Two!
- Not my balls!
946
00:59:19,119 --> 00:59:24,021
Open up, Lucio! My wife will
do anything. I know she means it!
947
00:59:25,872 --> 00:59:27,341
A ghost!
948
00:59:39,121 --> 00:59:40,305
Come out!
949
00:59:41,105 --> 00:59:44,225
Now repeat: "I'm a bastard!"
950
00:59:44,725 --> 00:59:46,122
I'm a bastard!
951
00:59:46,123 --> 00:59:47,454
Get over there!
952
00:59:47,954 --> 00:59:49,090
Get into the bed!
953
00:59:49,190 --> 00:59:50,307
No, Madame! It's impossible!
954
00:59:50,308 --> 00:59:53,587
Why? Aren't you husband
and wife? Consummate, quick!
955
00:59:53,588 --> 00:59:55,476
I can't! I have a physical problem.
956
00:59:55,477 --> 00:59:56,648
Consummate... now!
957
00:59:56,649 --> 00:59:57,728
I'm virgin!
958
01:00:00,077 --> 01:00:01,437
Consummate!
959
01:00:02,213 --> 01:00:06,305
Look, cheater!
Your lover is cheating on you!
960
01:00:06,405 --> 01:00:07,733
Get your hands down!
961
01:00:08,817 --> 01:00:10,441
You're doing it!
962
01:00:10,442 --> 01:00:12,877
Of course, otherwise she'll shoot us!
963
01:00:13,177 --> 01:00:15,057
Then you are not gay!
964
01:00:15,157 --> 01:00:16,646
Don't be silly! Of course not!
965
01:00:17,046 --> 01:00:18,275
Why do you pretend then?
966
01:00:18,276 --> 01:00:23,202
Because if I pretend to be gay, everyone
asks me if I've ever slept with a woman.
967
01:00:23,671 --> 01:00:24,870
And I say I haven't.
968
01:00:25,170 --> 01:00:28,063
Then they ask me to try... and I agree.
969
01:00:31,504 --> 01:00:34,020
- Are you finished?
- Be patient. As you know, Madame ...
970
01:00:34,121 --> 01:00:36,328
... I've never done it
with a gun or a woman.
971
01:00:36,728 --> 01:00:38,058
Just a moment...
972
01:00:38,773 --> 01:00:42,081
One second... one second...
973
01:00:42,781 --> 01:00:45,985
Another second... and I'll come!
974
01:00:46,185 --> 01:00:49,226
Yes... I came!
975
01:00:49,227 --> 01:00:52,081
- I came.
- Me too!
976
01:00:54,182 --> 01:00:56,507
All right then.
I'll get dressed and we can leave.
977
01:00:56,508 --> 01:00:57,934
Take my clothes off!
978
01:00:58,234 --> 01:01:00,639
Here? In front of strangers?
979
01:01:00,640 --> 01:01:03,768
I told you to get me undressed!
Don't make me repeat things!
980
01:01:03,868 --> 01:01:05,083
You're crazy!
981
01:01:05,084 --> 01:01:07,660
Yes, I'm totally insane!
982
01:01:07,661 --> 01:01:08,880
Now get me undressed!
983
01:01:09,280 --> 01:01:11,021
All right, all right!
984
01:01:12,021 --> 01:01:14,814
See what I have to do!
Calm down, calm down!
985
01:01:15,114 --> 01:01:16,321
Wife, please...
986
01:01:17,021 --> 01:01:19,531
This thing... how do I get it off?
Help me with the fasteners!
987
01:01:19,532 --> 01:01:21,421
Calm down, calm down!
988
01:01:22,621 --> 01:01:24,063
You, woman! Get up!
989
01:01:24,064 --> 01:01:25,443
Get up!
990
01:01:25,843 --> 01:01:27,147
What do you want me to do?
991
01:01:27,547 --> 01:01:28,931
Lucio, you get up too!
992
01:01:28,932 --> 01:01:30,631
- Go!
- Yes.. of course!
993
01:01:30,632 --> 01:01:33,619
You stay there, Miss.
But Lucio remains in the bed!
994
01:01:33,620 --> 01:01:35,455
Yes, stay in the bed! And we'll leave!
995
01:01:35,456 --> 01:01:38,016
No! You don't understand!
996
01:01:38,616 --> 01:01:41,304
You all have to stay here!
997
01:01:41,305 --> 01:01:42,894
What are we going to do? Group sex?
998
01:01:43,580 --> 01:01:46,095
And you, young man...
999
01:01:47,509 --> 01:01:48,857
- What are you doing?
- Young man!
1000
01:01:48,889 --> 01:01:51,013
- Fuck me!
- That not possible, Madame!
1001
01:01:51,514 --> 01:01:52,428
Oh God!
1002
01:01:53,601 --> 01:01:56,404
He's fucking her for sure! I can see!
1003
01:01:56,770 --> 01:01:58,198
Come on, come on!
1004
01:01:58,398 --> 01:01:59,639
But he's gay!
1005
01:01:59,739 --> 01:02:00,887
You're humiliating him!
1006
01:02:00,897 --> 01:02:02,331
Tell her, Lucio!
1007
01:02:03,231 --> 01:02:07,256
Yes, you heard your husband, Madame?
1008
01:02:07,356 --> 01:02:08,592
I'm gay!
1009
01:02:08,892 --> 01:02:13,021
If all gays are like you...
1010
01:02:16,132 --> 01:02:17,853
He's really good, eh?
1011
01:02:18,949 --> 01:02:20,905
He's not faking it, your honor!
1012
01:02:21,605 --> 01:02:23,028
What do you mean?
1013
01:02:23,197 --> 01:02:25,551
I mean that he's making you a cuckold!
1014
01:02:26,530 --> 01:02:30,229
Lucio!
Are you pretending or are you fucking?
1015
01:02:30,230 --> 01:02:33,887
I don't know... is this how it's done?
1016
01:02:34,599 --> 01:02:35,999
Of course it is!
1017
01:02:36,099 --> 01:02:38,191
Lucio, try to remember what you are!
1018
01:02:38,291 --> 01:02:39,322
Yes, yes...
1019
01:02:39,323 --> 01:02:40,544
Are you still doing it?
1020
01:02:40,644 --> 01:02:43,011
- I don't know... I don't know.
- That's impossible!
1021
01:02:43,512 --> 01:02:44,912
I feel a strange force...
1022
01:02:45,412 --> 01:02:47,285
A force that's working a miracle!
1023
01:02:47,585 --> 01:02:49,013
A miracle, uh?
1024
01:02:49,113 --> 01:02:50,453
Get off that horse!
1025
01:02:50,553 --> 01:02:52,857
I must apologize, Madame. I have to go now.
1026
01:02:52,859 --> 01:02:56,885
No! Keep going, my young stud!
1027
01:02:56,886 --> 01:02:59,457
I'm afraid I can't stop now, your honor.
1028
01:02:59,522 --> 01:03:02,738
Go on, don't stop!
You're doing so well! More!
1029
01:03:02,739 --> 01:03:05,262
You see? I can't stop! I mustn't stop!
1030
01:03:05,362 --> 01:03:08,976
What a day! It's like being
in a stable with the horses!
1031
01:03:11,878 --> 01:03:13,024
Hello?
1032
01:03:13,324 --> 01:03:14,295
Yes!
1033
01:03:14,595 --> 01:03:17,172
Yes, I ordered room service.
1034
01:03:17,772 --> 01:03:19,542
What do you mean, who serviced the room?
1035
01:03:20,957 --> 01:03:23,393
The one who's doing
a great job servicing my wife!
1036
01:03:26,089 --> 01:03:27,137
Quiet!
1037
01:03:27,237 --> 01:03:28,550
Quiet!
1038
01:03:29,190 --> 01:03:31,646
That's Diana, one of my friends!
1039
01:03:32,046 --> 01:03:33,506
I taught her ...
1040
01:03:33,606 --> 01:03:35,822
... in a fine college!
1041
01:03:35,823 --> 01:03:37,182
Quiet!
1042
01:03:37,183 --> 01:03:38,246
She said, "quiet"!
1043
01:03:38,247 --> 01:03:40,095
Yes, do it! So we can continue!
1044
01:03:40,195 --> 01:03:41,261
Go on then!
1045
01:03:41,435 --> 01:03:43,396
So, Miss, continue!
1046
01:05:56,879 --> 01:05:59,083
This chapter is dated only few days ago.
1047
01:05:59,683 --> 01:06:02,604
The one about the... the Mafioso in love.
1048
01:06:03,104 --> 01:06:06,224
"In love" is actually his name.
He is called Frank Innamorato.
1049
01:06:06,997 --> 01:06:08,909
- The killer?!
- Yes, that's him.
1050
01:06:09,077 --> 01:06:11,528
- You know that terrible criminal?
- Yes.
1051
01:06:11,697 --> 01:06:14,287
Don't tell me that
you... with him too?
1052
01:06:14,387 --> 01:06:16,242
What do you mean
when you say you know him?
1053
01:06:16,243 --> 01:06:17,678
In the biblical sense?
1054
01:06:17,878 --> 01:06:21,013
One day I was called for a home service.
1055
01:06:21,313 --> 01:06:23,706
I said that I couldn't go out that night.
1056
01:06:24,106 --> 01:06:28,108
Actually I was going to meet my fianc�,
whom I hadn't seen for a long time.
1057
01:06:28,739 --> 01:06:32,372
The man who called didn't care about my
problems, and told me to be on time.
1058
01:06:32,472 --> 01:06:35,004
He told me to wear a black dress, and to be a blond.
1059
01:06:35,619 --> 01:06:37,724
He wanted someone
who looked like Jean Harlow.
1060
01:06:37,924 --> 01:06:40,405
I tried to tell him again
that I couldn't go that night, ...
1061
01:06:40,505 --> 01:06:43,404
... but he wouldn't listen, and hung up.
1062
01:06:51,582 --> 01:06:54,026
I was curious, and decided to go.
1063
01:06:59,830 --> 01:07:01,835
We've arrived, blondie! Get out!
1064
01:07:02,984 --> 01:07:04,691
Get out... quickly!
1065
01:07:05,627 --> 01:07:07,351
Are you still in the car?
1066
01:07:08,023 --> 01:07:09,884
You don't know who's waiting for you!
1067
01:07:09,984 --> 01:07:11,823
- Hey, wait a minute!
- This is your night!
1068
01:07:12,093 --> 01:07:13,557
You'll have a wild night!
1069
01:07:13,657 --> 01:07:15,359
- Have the guys arrived?
- They're all inside.
1070
01:07:15,360 --> 01:07:16,914
Come on, move! Let's not waste time!
1071
01:07:16,985 --> 01:07:18,893
Hey, guys! Hey, guys!
1072
01:07:19,845 --> 01:07:21,333
We've arrived!
1073
01:07:22,506 --> 01:07:24,593
Armando? Come here!
1074
01:07:26,622 --> 01:07:27,703
Carmelo?
1075
01:07:28,003 --> 01:07:29,238
Don't make me drag you!
1076
01:07:29,239 --> 01:07:30,610
Ciccio, come here!
1077
01:07:30,710 --> 01:07:32,505
Let go of my arm, I'll
have bruises tomorrow!
1078
01:08:14,850 --> 01:08:18,856
- Am I scaring you?
- Yes.
1079
01:08:21,197 --> 01:08:23,872
- Do you know who I am?
- Yes.
1080
01:08:25,485 --> 01:08:29,537
- Do you know my name?
- Frank Innamorato.
1081
01:08:30,962 --> 01:08:35,246
- Do you know what people call me?
- The woman beater.
1082
01:08:36,994 --> 01:08:40,672
- Why is that?
- I can only imagine!
1083
01:08:57,360 --> 01:08:59,155
Now you know why.
1084
01:08:59,445 --> 01:09:00,686
Let's go.
1085
01:09:00,886 --> 01:09:02,244
- Frank!
- What?
1086
01:09:04,558 --> 01:09:06,981
Don't hurt me too badly.
I beg you!
1087
01:09:09,303 --> 01:09:11,043
Listen to me, girl!
1088
01:09:11,895 --> 01:09:14,530
When I run wild, even
God can't stop me!
1089
01:09:15,351 --> 01:09:18,020
I can't help it. I can't do
anything to change it.
1090
01:09:18,968 --> 01:09:20,549
It's the same when I shoot.
1091
01:09:21,049 --> 01:09:23,333
A gun in my hands becomes
an atomic bomb!
1092
01:09:25,541 --> 01:09:27,270
Once you climb that staircase, ...
1093
01:09:27,770 --> 01:09:29,991
... I can't promise you'll return home.
1094
01:09:32,422 --> 01:09:35,475
So... what would you like to do?
1095
01:09:40,730 --> 01:09:42,092
Let's go.
1096
01:09:45,075 --> 01:09:46,964
Have fun!
1097
01:10:11,201 --> 01:10:12,613
No! Give me your foot!
1098
01:10:14,038 --> 01:10:15,794
- This one?
- It doesn't matter which one.
1099
01:10:25,596 --> 01:10:27,251
Nothing! Damn!
1100
01:10:27,657 --> 01:10:30,374
- It seemed like it was good...
- It was false alarm.
1101
01:10:38,649 --> 01:10:39,594
Harder.
1102
01:10:41,030 --> 01:10:42,190
Harder!
1103
01:10:50,340 --> 01:10:51,780
Judas!
1104
01:10:56,988 --> 01:10:59,787
Poor Frank! It's terrible!
1105
01:11:00,692 --> 01:11:02,932
It's the biggest injustice in the world!
1106
01:11:04,100 --> 01:11:05,693
There's nothing you can do.
1107
01:11:05,893 --> 01:11:10,157
I've spent millions on doctors,
scientists, miracle cures... but nothing!
1108
01:11:10,654 --> 01:11:13,005
I even spoke with a snake charmer.
1109
01:11:13,305 --> 01:11:16,470
Why do people call you a woman-beater?
1110
01:11:16,870 --> 01:11:19,697
Money. Money!
1111
01:11:21,278 --> 01:11:23,362
I bought my reputation, okay? I paid for it!
1112
01:11:23,563 --> 01:11:25,076
Do you understand? I paid for it!
1113
01:11:25,895 --> 01:11:28,113
I'm losing everything... damn!
1114
01:11:33,092 --> 01:11:34,599
What are you laughing at?
1115
01:11:34,840 --> 01:11:36,928
Fuck? No, nothing...
1116
01:11:38,445 --> 01:11:39,892
That poor girl.
1117
01:11:40,292 --> 01:11:42,521
She doesn't know what it will happen to her!
1118
01:11:42,522 --> 01:11:45,506
Frank Innamorato is a psycho case!
1119
01:11:45,771 --> 01:11:48,181
He needs a woman every day.
1120
01:11:48,381 --> 01:11:52,175
Can you imagine us
alone with him in the desert?
1121
01:11:53,995 --> 01:11:56,032
We'd have to sacrifice ourselves.
1122
01:12:03,979 --> 01:12:07,803
I can't have fun without letting
all the organization know about it!
1123
01:12:08,361 --> 01:12:09,845
They believe it!
1124
01:12:10,045 --> 01:12:11,549
They call me the fucking machine.
1125
01:12:11,949 --> 01:12:13,173
Instead...
1126
01:12:16,150 --> 01:12:18,717
Diana, you have to help me.
1127
01:12:19,117 --> 01:12:22,109
- What can I do?
- If they find out, I'll be ruined!
1128
01:12:22,142 --> 01:12:23,966
They'll put a bomb up my ass!
1129
01:12:24,066 --> 01:12:26,002
- Help me!
- How?
1130
01:12:27,263 --> 01:12:28,451
Let's pretend.
1131
01:12:28,751 --> 01:12:31,948
I'll pretend I'm hitting
you, and you scream loudly.
1132
01:12:32,055 --> 01:12:33,083
Okay.
1133
01:12:33,183 --> 01:12:34,790
I've done this with all the other women.
1134
01:12:40,560 --> 01:12:41,915
- Are you ready?
- Yes, sure!
1135
01:12:46,477 --> 01:12:47,655
Louder!
1136
01:12:48,437 --> 01:12:50,394
- Help me...
- Help me!
1137
01:12:50,594 --> 01:12:53,246
- Don't kill me...
- Don't kill me! Don't kill me!
1138
01:12:53,646 --> 01:12:55,533
What sweet music!
1139
01:12:56,042 --> 01:12:58,961
He's just like his father, eh?
1140
01:13:01,135 --> 01:13:02,543
What do you want me to say...
1141
01:13:03,243 --> 01:13:04,531
I love you!
1142
01:13:05,231 --> 01:13:06,464
You're killing me!
1143
01:13:07,064 --> 01:13:08,435
I love it!
1144
01:13:09,235 --> 01:13:10,712
- What did you say?
- You make me hot!
1145
01:13:10,713 --> 01:13:12,407
You make me hot!
1146
01:13:12,507 --> 01:13:13,725
You're so handsome!
1147
01:13:14,125 --> 01:13:15,324
You're such a man!
1148
01:13:15,824 --> 01:13:17,060
So masculine!
1149
01:13:17,360 --> 01:13:18,529
You're a man!
1150
01:13:18,530 --> 01:13:19,739
A man!
1151
01:13:25,890 --> 01:13:27,132
Here he comes.
1152
01:13:31,598 --> 01:13:32,907
Here you go.
1153
01:13:37,254 --> 01:13:38,945
Four times in one night.
1154
01:13:39,379 --> 01:13:40,703
She was insatiable.
1155
01:13:41,440 --> 01:13:44,342
Worse than that tall woman
you brought me yesterday.
1156
01:13:46,164 --> 01:13:47,655
Take her home.
1157
01:13:48,096 --> 01:13:49,891
Give her a thousand.
1158
01:13:51,685 --> 01:13:52,795
Come on, guys.
1159
01:14:29,341 --> 01:14:30,664
Please... continue.
1160
01:14:31,798 --> 01:14:35,403
Another way for beautiful
prostitutes to earn money is ...
1161
01:14:35,503 --> 01:14:37,906
... posing for sex comics, ...
1162
01:14:37,907 --> 01:14:40,279
... making hardcore photos, ...
1163
01:14:40,280 --> 01:14:42,835
... and in pornographic films.
1164
01:14:43,135 --> 01:14:46,763
In order to know about them, I tried them all.
1165
01:14:51,600 --> 01:14:54,014
Bring the girls onto the set!
1166
01:14:54,314 --> 01:14:55,469
Quickly, quickly!
1167
01:14:55,470 --> 01:14:58,224
You're too fat!
You eat too much pasta!
1168
01:14:58,624 --> 01:15:03,206
I've worked out some great
positions for the two of you, ....
1169
01:15:03,207 --> 01:15:05,544
... very erotic ones. Let's see...
1170
01:15:06,093 --> 01:15:07,387
You!
1171
01:15:08,290 --> 01:15:10,409
You Italians are so excitable!
1172
01:15:11,335 --> 01:15:12,396
Let's go.
1173
01:15:13,283 --> 01:15:14,407
We have work to do!
1174
01:15:14,507 --> 01:15:15,851
Get the young man ready.
1175
01:15:16,251 --> 01:15:17,793
Undress him.
1176
01:15:22,356 --> 01:15:24,001
This one's nice! Yes...
1177
01:15:24,896 --> 01:15:26,284
That's it, don't move.
1178
01:15:46,462 --> 01:15:48,659
This was the "Alien" position.
1179
01:15:49,159 --> 01:15:51,008
It allowed the partners to read, ...
1180
01:15:51,108 --> 01:15:52,268
... to eat, ...
1181
01:15:52,269 --> 01:15:53,851
... or watch TV.
1182
01:15:54,151 --> 01:15:57,981
I can recommend it
for TV shows and comedies.
1183
01:15:59,220 --> 01:16:01,880
The "Burn Baby, Burn" position.
1184
01:16:01,881 --> 01:16:03,849
It's sometimes used with a
sister or brother in law, ...
1185
01:16:03,849 --> 01:16:05,637
... or with an aunt and her nephew.
1186
01:16:06,293 --> 01:16:08,882
This is the "Thank You for a
Hot December" position.
1187
01:16:08,982 --> 01:16:13,203
Breathe slowly, and hold the breath in.
It's better if it's hot.
1188
01:16:13,204 --> 01:16:16,155
Stretch your tendons
and wait until they move.
1189
01:16:16,156 --> 01:16:17,802
If you can do it, it's very good.
1190
01:16:17,803 --> 01:16:19,275
It is used mainly in southern Italy.
1191
01:16:20,075 --> 01:16:22,135
This is the "Chair" position.
1192
01:16:22,635 --> 01:16:26,492
It has an ancient origin,
before the invention of the chair itself.
1193
01:16:27,200 --> 01:16:28,876
Before its invention, women ...
1194
01:16:28,877 --> 01:16:30,861
... solved the problem of sitting ...
1195
01:16:30,862 --> 01:16:32,993
... in this ingenious way.
1196
01:16:33,293 --> 01:16:35,609
It's the favorite position
among feminists.
1197
01:16:36,561 --> 01:16:37,872
This is the "Classic" position.
1198
01:16:37,873 --> 01:16:39,997
It is also known as the "Wedding" position.
1199
01:16:40,097 --> 01:16:41,826
It is rarely used nowadays.
1200
01:16:41,827 --> 01:16:43,374
Young people in particular don't like it.
1201
01:16:43,375 --> 01:16:44,858
We don't know why.
1202
01:16:45,058 --> 01:16:47,262
There's an investigation to learn why.
1203
01:16:47,362 --> 01:16:48,934
Great! Fabulous!
1204
01:16:49,934 --> 01:16:51,688
This position requires strong muscles.
1205
01:16:51,689 --> 01:16:53,798
It is suitable for wrestlers and porters, ...
1206
01:16:53,799 --> 01:16:55,636
... but not suitable for intellectuals.
1207
01:16:55,637 --> 01:16:59,537
Return the woman to her usual
position when her color becomes abnormal, ...
1208
01:16:59,538 --> 01:17:02,102
... or when there's a little
blood coming from her nose.
1209
01:17:03,443 --> 01:17:05,181
Quiet! No applause!
1210
01:17:05,872 --> 01:17:07,361
Quiet!
1211
01:17:10,861 --> 01:17:12,322
Am I speaking Chinese?!
1212
01:17:13,713 --> 01:17:15,602
Don't make fun of me! Quiet!
1213
01:17:16,482 --> 01:17:17,859
Quiet!
1214
01:17:26,847 --> 01:17:30,679
When you write an ad,
sometimes women will answer too.
1215
01:17:31,379 --> 01:17:33,204
They are not always lesbians.
1216
01:17:33,204 --> 01:17:36,466
Sometimes they are frigid and
would like to find out if they're lesbians.
1217
01:17:38,652 --> 01:17:41,305
She looked at everything, ...
1218
01:17:41,405 --> 01:17:43,745
... she touched my bed.
1219
01:17:43,845 --> 01:17:46,562
Immodestly, I showed her my breasts.
1220
01:17:47,237 --> 01:17:51,334
Have courage, I tell her. Taste this poison.
1221
01:17:55,223 --> 01:17:57,633
Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea culpa!
1222
01:17:58,358 --> 01:18:01,211
My kiss didn't help that much.
1223
01:18:01,611 --> 01:18:06,787
She was disgusted, but she tried again.
1224
01:18:06,788 --> 01:18:09,123
Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea culpa!
1225
01:18:09,313 --> 01:18:10,700
She hesitated.
1226
01:18:13,305 --> 01:18:16,174
She turned back, she looked
at me... and she stopped.
1227
01:18:17,654 --> 01:18:19,193
She was searching for something.
1228
01:18:20,350 --> 01:18:21,845
She paid me.
1229
01:18:21,846 --> 01:18:23,544
And she left.
1230
01:18:23,934 --> 01:18:30,202
I immediately wrote in my notebook
that heterosexuals are usually better.
1231
01:19:05,500 --> 01:19:07,566
Whip my ass!
1232
01:19:09,688 --> 01:19:13,664
This is Tarzan. But that's another story.
1233
01:19:14,364 --> 01:19:16,088
When did you make the appointment for?
1234
01:19:16,113 --> 01:19:18,548
Is he late? It's for 6 pm.
1235
01:19:18,848 --> 01:19:20,360
I still have a few minutes, then.
1236
01:19:20,460 --> 01:19:22,573
Do you know him? Is he usually on time?
1237
01:19:23,073 --> 01:19:24,981
Yes. Here he comes now!
1238
01:19:24,982 --> 01:19:27,534
He's right on time, like an American bomber!
1239
01:19:28,461 --> 01:19:29,676
Excellency!
1240
01:19:34,318 --> 01:19:35,600
You!
1241
01:19:35,767 --> 01:19:37,043
Papa?!
1242
01:19:37,507 --> 01:19:38,770
You?!
1243
01:19:39,439 --> 01:19:42,700
I'm so disgusted!
1244
01:19:42,701 --> 01:19:44,035
Papa...
1245
01:19:44,835 --> 01:19:48,324
I can't believe it!
1246
01:19:48,325 --> 01:19:50,608
Then it's true that you're a hooker!
1247
01:19:50,648 --> 01:19:53,397
Then it's true that you're a prostitute!
1248
01:19:53,398 --> 01:19:56,603
- Papa, I...
- Don't ever call me that again!
1249
01:19:58,354 --> 01:19:59,701
You're disgusting!
1250
01:20:00,101 --> 01:20:01,930
You're a filthy hooker!
1251
01:20:02,030 --> 01:20:05,607
I can't understand why you've done this.
1252
01:20:05,707 --> 01:20:07,259
- Why?
- Poor man...
1253
01:20:07,260 --> 01:20:10,291
- What did I ever deny you?
- Poor man...
1254
01:20:10,343 --> 01:20:14,184
I sent you to study at the best schools.
1255
01:20:14,184 --> 01:20:16,200
I made sure you traveled around the world.
1256
01:20:16,200 --> 01:20:19,592
I was always there for you...
1257
01:20:19,592 --> 01:20:21,319
Where are you now?
1258
01:20:21,319 --> 01:20:23,432
In a whore-house...
1259
01:20:23,432 --> 01:20:27,080
A brothel! A brothel!
1260
01:20:27,081 --> 01:20:30,844
- With that whoring pimp!
- He's right...
1261
01:20:30,969 --> 01:20:34,922
Don't deny it! She's a whore, too!
1262
01:20:34,922 --> 01:20:37,040
You bitch!
1263
01:20:39,439 --> 01:20:42,171
Diana... Diana...
1264
01:20:43,271 --> 01:20:45,174
Did I hurt you, Diana?
1265
01:20:45,274 --> 01:20:47,803
My dearest! Oh, Diana...
1266
01:20:48,003 --> 01:20:50,413
You've caused me so much suffering.
1267
01:20:51,213 --> 01:20:54,489
My God... her family is ruined!
1268
01:20:54,490 --> 01:20:57,343
I only wanted the best for you.
1269
01:20:57,643 --> 01:21:01,439
You were my little girl.
I adored you... I do adore you!
1270
01:21:02,045 --> 01:21:03,505
But now...
1271
01:21:03,705 --> 01:21:07,589
Papa, forgive me!
I'm still your little girl!
1272
01:21:07,673 --> 01:21:08,883
- Really?
- Yes!
1273
01:21:09,726 --> 01:21:13,343
Tell your papa, was it a
man who brought you here?
1274
01:21:13,743 --> 01:21:15,035
- Yes?
- Yes!
1275
01:21:15,036 --> 01:21:18,033
So... you need a man!
1276
01:21:19,516 --> 01:21:21,509
You need sex!
1277
01:21:22,236 --> 01:21:24,364
Undress! Lie down!
1278
01:21:24,665 --> 01:21:27,504
- No papa!
- I'll show you who's a man!
1279
01:21:27,505 --> 01:21:29,584
I'll show you!
1280
01:21:29,584 --> 01:21:32,177
Me! I'm a man! Now lie down!
1281
01:21:32,178 --> 01:21:35,024
Close that door, you bitch!
1282
01:21:35,552 --> 01:21:37,522
You're a whore, too!
1283
01:21:37,622 --> 01:21:40,699
Now you'll see who's a man!
1284
01:21:42,750 --> 01:21:44,536
Did you enjoy it?
1285
01:21:44,601 --> 01:21:46,518
It was great! Fantastic!
1286
01:21:46,618 --> 01:21:49,687
Then I hope you'll
show how pleased you are.
1287
01:21:49,688 --> 01:21:51,331
Of course.
1288
01:21:51,431 --> 01:21:53,156
Is 100.000 good for you?
1289
01:21:53,303 --> 01:21:59,125
But next time I'd like to be rougher.
1290
01:21:59,126 --> 01:22:01,491
For example, when I hit you!
1291
01:22:02,837 --> 01:22:06,741
Like that. Maybe I'll
change everything next time.
1292
01:22:06,742 --> 01:22:07,765
How?
1293
01:22:07,766 --> 01:22:10,702
I'd like... perhaps if I was younger...
1294
01:22:10,903 --> 01:22:12,589
I'd like to pretend to be your brother...
1295
01:22:12,590 --> 01:22:13,963
Brother and sister...
1296
01:22:14,243 --> 01:22:16,094
You're a naughty boy!
1297
01:22:16,095 --> 01:22:17,443
Just a little... yes.
1298
01:22:17,597 --> 01:22:19,095
Bye.
1299
01:22:19,096 --> 01:22:20,517
Have a good day!
1300
01:22:24,371 --> 01:22:26,359
See you next Tuesday!
1301
01:22:26,360 --> 01:22:29,023
- At 6pm, just like an American bomber!
- Yes!
1302
01:22:29,508 --> 01:22:31,256
- Bye!
- Bye...
1303
01:22:33,568 --> 01:22:35,092
Still...
1304
01:22:41,097 --> 01:22:46,595
What do your parents, friends
and so forth, think about your thesis?
1305
01:22:47,851 --> 01:22:49,610
My father is in Africa.
1306
01:22:49,910 --> 01:22:51,359
My mother was enthusiastic, ...
1307
01:22:51,360 --> 01:22:54,344
... but I don't think she really
understood what I was doing.
1308
01:22:55,803 --> 01:23:00,367
Some of my friends were scandalized,
and others were simply curious.
1309
01:23:00,871 --> 01:23:02,448
Most people approved.
1310
01:23:03,448 --> 01:23:08,164
Your... as you referred to him...
fianc�... what does he think?
1311
01:23:08,241 --> 01:23:10,824
He agreed from the very beginning.
1312
01:23:12,345 --> 01:23:14,217
- Very modern?
- No... a cuckold!
1313
01:23:14,218 --> 01:23:15,118
Ah... that's fair.
1314
01:23:15,409 --> 01:23:17,605
We'll get married as soon as I receive my diploma.
1315
01:23:17,805 --> 01:23:19,245
In the town hall!
1316
01:23:19,456 --> 01:23:23,834
I have gained a deep
understanding of sexual problems.
1317
01:23:24,338 --> 01:23:26,022
Which I believe will make me a better wife.
1318
01:23:26,122 --> 01:23:26,944
Yeah, sure...
1319
01:23:27,144 --> 01:23:31,664
When you have sex for money,
you don't care about sex at all.
1320
01:23:31,665 --> 01:23:33,984
In our society, sex is still a mystery.
1321
01:23:33,985 --> 01:23:35,141
An unsolved mystery.
1322
01:23:35,142 --> 01:23:37,196
And that is not a good thing.
1323
01:23:37,197 --> 01:23:42,504
Don't think that being a prostitute is easy.
1324
01:23:43,104 --> 01:23:44,656
You have to be good at it!
1325
01:23:44,657 --> 01:23:47,676
There are thousand things to learn to do it well.
1326
01:23:48,022 --> 01:23:49,869
And you have to take care of your health, ...
1327
01:23:49,870 --> 01:23:52,918
... because it's an extremely tiring job.
1328
01:23:52,919 --> 01:23:54,259
Even if you're lying on your back.
1329
01:23:54,854 --> 01:23:57,391
Of course you have be careful about diseases.
1330
01:23:58,427 --> 01:24:01,047
It takes several months
to become a good prostitute.
1331
01:24:01,147 --> 01:24:02,279
You need to develop sensitivity, ...
1332
01:24:02,280 --> 01:24:03,954
... to be aware of people's needs.
1333
01:24:04,516 --> 01:24:07,564
It's important to develop
good sexual techniques, ...
1334
01:24:07,664 --> 01:24:09,636
... a reverance for sex, ...
1335
01:24:09,637 --> 01:24:10,781
... as well as medical qualifications.
1336
01:24:11,068 --> 01:24:15,620
So, no matter where I go from here, I can
always use the secret skills that I've learned.
1337
01:24:15,620 --> 01:24:16,636
Isn't that so?
1338
01:24:29,126 --> 01:24:31,814
"Let's clap our hands on her bottom.
1339
01:24:31,814 --> 01:24:35,015
Let's throw her many flowers.
1340
01:24:35,015 --> 01:24:36,680
Let's sing all together
1341
01:24:36,680 --> 01:24:38,407
she's cute, she's cute!
1342
01:24:38,407 --> 01:24:41,128
Let's touch her pussy!
Hooray for the Professor!
1343
01:24:41,128 --> 01:24:44,168
Three roosters on the table
1344
01:24:44,168 --> 01:24:47,240
were having sex with doctor's daughter,
1345
01:24:47,240 --> 01:24:50,377
but the doctor's daughter was
having sex with the Professor,
1346
01:24:50,377 --> 01:24:53,509
while the other teacher
was with the doctor.
1347
01:24:55,017 --> 01:24:56,521
Four legs on the table,
1348
01:24:56,521 --> 01:24:59,562
the teacher has a nice ass,
1349
01:24:59,562 --> 01:25:02,569
I touch her breast, nice hard tits!
1350
01:25:02,569 --> 01:25:05,568
She has a pretty face and a cute little ass!
1351
01:25:07,146 --> 01:25:08,939
The girl is on the table.
1352
01:25:08,939 --> 01:25:11,659
I tell the teacher, go to Hell.
1353
01:25:11,659 --> 01:25:13,291
And there is progress,
1354
01:25:13,291 --> 01:25:17,798
we're having orgies in the classroom!
1355
01:25:19,244 --> 01:25:20,781
Eight legs on the table,
1356
01:25:20,781 --> 01:25:23,724
the teacher has a nice ass,
1357
01:25:23,724 --> 01:25:26,766
I touch her breast, nice hard tits!
1358
01:25:26,766 --> 01:25:29,832
She has a pretty face and a cute little ass!
1359
01:25:31,309 --> 01:25:34,510
20 books on the table, listen to this:
1360
01:25:34,510 --> 01:25:37,646
Talking about the students' life,
1361
01:25:37,646 --> 01:25:42,054
they make funny jokes!
1362
01:25:43,375 --> 01:25:44,848
Ten legs on the table,
1363
01:25:44,848 --> 01:25:47,983
the teacher has a nice ass,
1364
01:25:47,983 --> 01:25:50,800
I touch her breast, nice hard tits!
1365
01:25:50,800 --> 01:25:54,801
She has a pretty face and a cute little ass!"99516
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