All language subtitles for The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air S04E05 WEB [1080p].en

[instrumental music]

♪ I know when to hold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to fold 'em ♪

♪ Know when to walk away ♪

♪ But don't know
when to shut up ♪

Read 'em and weep.

- Ugh!
- Oh.

Ah, this is
the best day of my life.

Wait, even better than the
day
you met the Van Patten
family?

Hey-hey-hey, guys, I remember
the best day of my life.

It was when I did the wild thing
for the first time!

Ooh, I cut outta high school
to go to "Soul Train"

and the next thing I knew,
me and this honey

was knockin' boots behind
the "Soul Train" scrabble board!

Wait-wait a minute.

You mean you cut
high school in Akron, Ohio

to go to "Soul Train",
which tapes in LA?

Hey-hey, high school
was borin', okay?

- Yeah, we believe that one.
- Mm-hm.

Yo, man, I remember
my first time.

Right before I came
out here from Philly.

Ms. X gave me an unforgettable
going-away present.

Ms. X.

What was it?

A key chain, Carl,
what do you think, man?

Look, all I'm sayin' is,
she was very special

and this True Mack here
was solid gold.

Man, I remember my first time.

It was everything
a young man could dream of.

And it only cost me 35 bucks.

But of course,
things were cheaper then.

That's very touching, Jazz.

Carlton, uh, you've been
mighty quiet over there

about this here subject.

Maybe he ain't got
nothin' to talk about.

Mm-hm, lockjaw.

I thought we were here
to play poker.

I think he's more used
to playin' solitaire.

Solitaire!
Whoo!

Oh, ho, oh, I guess
y'all don't know.

Look, the only problem
this stallion has

is keepin' the names
with the faces

if you know what I'm sayin'.

You know, Carl-Carlton,
tell 'em

tell 'em about the time.
Tell 'em about the time!

Not that it's anybody's business

but my first time will be
a loving expression

of my commitment
to the girl of my dreams.

That's beautiful, Carlton.

I call, check it out.

Three kings and a virgin!

[theme song]

♪ Now this is a story all
about ♪

♪ How my life got flipped
turned upside down ♪

♪ And I'd like to take minute
just sit right there ♪

♪ I'll tell you
how I became the prince ♪

♪ Of a town called Bel-Air ♪

♪In West Philadelphia
born and raised ♪

♪ On the playground was where
I spent the most of my days ♪

♪ Chillin' out maxin'
relaxin' all cool ♪

♪ All shootin' some b-ball
outside of the school ♪

♪ When a couple of guys
who were up to no good ♪

♪ Started makin' trouble
in my neighborhood ♪

♪ I got in one little fight
and my mom got scared and said ♪

♪ You're movin' with your auntie
and uncle in Bel-Air ♪

♪ I whistled for a cab
and when it came near ♪

♪ The license plate said fresh
and it had dice in the mirror ♪

♪ If anything I can say
that this cab was rare ♪

♪ But I thought nah forget it
yo homes to Bel-Air ♪

♪ I pulled up to the house
at about seven or eight ♪

♪ And I yelled to the cabbie
yo homes smell ya later ♪

♪ I looked at my kingdom
I was finally there ♪

♪ To sit on my throne
as the prince of Bel-Air ♪

[instrumental music]

♪ If I had a hammer ♪♪

Hey, I do.

Hey, Will.

Hey, what's up, Carl?
What you doin' here?

Well, I'm here to sign up
for the reception.

The dean of the business
school's a Princeton alumni.

You know what that means.

Yeah, you'll be kissing
more butt than Arsenio.

Look, Dean Morgan could be
my ticket into Princeton.

Kissing up is
a small price to pay.

Well, you know what? Just try
not to embarrass yourself again.

What's that supposed to mean?

Last night, Carlton,
I mean, this innocence thing.

In high school,
that was cute, but come on

you're a man now, start lyin'.

Why? I have nothing
to be embarrassed about.

I'm waiting for Ms. Right.

Oh, Carlton,
please forget about Ms.
Right.

Go for Ms. Right Now.

Well, I don't wanna
settle for just anyone.

I mean, when I was a kid, I used
to sit up in my tree house

thinking for hours
about my dream girl.

Oh, I can see her now.

[elevator door opens]

She's got beautiful brown eyes

and a smile that
lights up the room.

- Ah, Carl-Carlton.
- She'll be a great dresser.

Sophisticated, beautiful
and long dark hair.

- Uh, Carl--
- Let me finish, Will!

She'll love
everything I love.

Money, Ivy League schools
and America.

Ah, excuse me, can I pay
for this Business Week now?

The Princeton game
is about start

and I don't wanna
miss the national anthem.

Hey, lady, we were talking.

Uh, look just-just a second
I'll be right with you, alright?

Okay.

Carlton, man, it's her.

(Carl)
'You think?'

Come on, man,
baby is all that.

Go on, step to her
and ask her out.

So you're
a Princeton fan?

- Not really.
- Oh.

But my favorite singer is
performing the national anthem.

- Who's that?
- Tom Jones.

♪ Love ♪

♪ Is a many-splendored thing ♪♪

Stupid, ask her out!

Um, my name's, um, uh..

Carlton.

Carlton.

Joann.

There's a TV in
the student union

maybe we could watch
Tom Jones together?

That sounds really nice,
Carlton.

Hey, good catch, Carl!

That girl's a..

That girl's a damn thief,
she stole that magazine. Hey!

Bob, Bob, Bob,
calm down.

Bob, judges don't cry.

Bob, this is just
an investigation.

'Everything's gonna
work out fine, trust me.'

Okay, bye.
Yeah, bye-bye.

- He's dead.
- What's goin' on, Uncle Phil?

That ethics committee is diggin'
up dirt on every judge in town.

It's a witch-hunt, man.
A witch-hunt.

Goodness. Clumsy me!

Philip, I thought
you were getting the car.

What's going on?

Oh, just that committee
nailed another judge.

I sure am glad we don't
have anything to hide.

Will?

Hey, look,
I found that Chevette.

Body was already
in the trunk too.

Honey, come on, we're gonna
be late for the party.

Look, I am serious, Will.
You stay out of trouble.

The slightest indiscretion
could cost me my job.

[glass shattering]

G, what is up
with you today, man?

I mean, you seemin'
all jumpy and everything.

Jumpy?
No, not me.

- Come on, G, you can--
- Stop prosecuting me!

I've done nothing
I tell you, nothing.

You just can't get
good help these days.

[instrumental music]

That was the most romantic
afternoon I've ever had.

Oh, I knew you'd love
the Tom Jones museum.

Oh, I'm sorry we didn't make
it to the Hall Of Sideburns.

Here we are.

What?
Do you live in this hotel?

Oh, just until I find
a new apartment.

Wait, you could come
live at our house.

My little sister is almost 15

it's time she moved out
on her own.

I needed to laugh today.
Thank you.

Well, I don't want this to end.

It doesn't have to.

Will you marry me?

[Joann laughs]

You are too
adorable for words.

Can I give you
a kiss goodbye?

Yes.

Tomorrow morning.

Well, what time
should I come back?

[instrumental music]

Just toast and coffee
this morning, Geoffrey.

Geoffrey's not here, Hilary.

Can he do that?

He was so upset,
I gave him the morning off.

I better go check
see how he's doing.

Great, so what am I supposed
to do about breakfast?

Oh, here's a crazy idea, Hil,
how about you get it yourself?

Fine.

Bel-Air Hotel,
get me room service.

♪ What's new pussycat
whoa whoa whoa ♪

♪ What's new pussycat
whoa whoa ooh whoa oh ♪

I was up all night
worried sick about you.

Where have you been?
And how come you didn't call me?

Oh, my God, that's my mom's
finger, get it off my hand.

Pinch me, Will,
I'm in love.

I finally found
the woman of my dreams.

And I did it.

The big it!

You-you mean,
you and Joann..

...uh, closed the deal?

What are you guys
talking about?

Business, Ashley.
Here, have some breakfast.

S-so who put
the offer on the table?

Oh, uh, she did

and the terms were so attractive
I jumped on her, uh, it.

I jumped on it.

And, uh, don't worry

I protected my investment.

Come on, come on, tell me
everything, tell me everything!

- What was that all about?
- Carlton lost his virginity.

[instrumental music]

Hey, I'll see
y'all later, alright?

Hold on, Will. Geoffrey has
something he wants to tell us.

Hurry up, G,
I'm late for work, man.

I have a confession.

Something so shameful

I had hoped it could
remain buried forever.

Oh, I think I got
a minute or two for this one.

I hope this doesn't have
anything to do

with the ethics committee
investigation, Geoffrey.

I'm afraid it does, sir.

I beg your forgiveness
for bringing

this pox upon your house.

That's alright, just don't take
another morning off.

Okay, Geoffrey,
let's have it.

I'm too ashamed to talk about
it. It's better if I show you.

You did a porno movie?

Ew!

(male narrator on TV)
Montreal,
site of the 1976 Olympics

where some athletes become
heroes to their countries.

And where one man became

the shame of a nation.

Geoffrey Butler,
a long-distance runner

representing
Great Britain was descended

from a long line
of running Butlers.

The hopes of a nation
were on this

promising runner's shoulders.

Alas, his best was
simply not good enough.

Halfway through the race, young
Geoffrey Butler hit the wall.

But unfortunately,
he would not accept his defeat.

In this amazing footage shot by
Japanese tourist,Hashi Takashi

Geoffrey Butler'sunthinkable
actions were captured.

[speaking inforeign language]

(male narrator on TV)
Geoffrey Butler's false
victory was short-lived.

The Takashi footage was
released almost immediately

and the public was outraged.

Geoffrey Butler dropped from
sight, never to be seen again.

To his countrymen,
he isthe shame of a nation.

That's the shameful secret
I have kept inside for 17 years.

[laughing]

Hey, hey.
Hey, G, man.

Hey, we ain't
laughing at you, man.

I guess we kinda are.

Hey, G, why don't you
run into the kitchen

and get me something?

Oh, or better yet, take a cab.

[all laughing]

- Sensitive lot, aren't you?
- Oh-ho, Geoffrey.

The committee won't
care about any of this.

- They won't?
- Of course not.

You're a servant.
Get me some cake.

[laughing]

Geoffrey, what you did
was not a crime.

It was...stupid.

So, you mean
I'm not gonna cause you

any embarrassment or
scandal?

No, no.

Oh, man. Hey, G.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.

You mean, that's why
you came to America?

That's right, Master William.

When did you get
your green card?

Green card?
What-what green card?

[laughing]

(Will)
Welcome to the
ULA Business Reception.

Weenie?

You are what you eat, buddy.

Hey, there he is, ladies.

The love machine.
Okay, one at a time.

- Will.
- Okay.

Two at a time if you
think you're ready, baby.

Come on, Will,
it's hard enough for me

to think about anything else.

Oh, man, I understand.
I remember my first time.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.
She gave you a key chain.

(Carlton)
'There's Dean Morgan.'

Oh, I can't just
walk right up to him.

Carlton, haven't you
learned anything

from your experience
last night?

You want me to sleep with him?

Carlton, I'm saying when
you want something, go for it.

Now, he's over there. Just walk
over and introduce yourself.

[sighs]

Excuse me, Dean Morgan?

Carlton Banks, class of '97.

I read your paper
on the rise and fall of IBM.

I call it the feel-good
financial analysis of the year.

Let the butt kissing begin.

Yeah, Banks, Banks.

Yes, you're the chap who wants
to transfer to, uh, Princeton.

That's my alma mater,
you know.

Really?
Well,quellesurprise.

You know what it takes
to be accepted

into Princeton, Mr. Banks?

Inspiration.

And one phone call from me.

[laughing]

Oh, this must be fate.

I mean, I-I had my
inspiration yesterday.

I found a woman
who makes me believe

that anything is possible.

Well, I feel the same way
about Mrs. Morgan.

Ah, here she is now.

Sweetheart.

Carlton Banks, I'd like
you to meet my wife, Joann.

Hey-hey, it is great to see
you two together again.

Ah, you've met my wife?

I mean, it is great to see
you two together again.

Do I know you?

Oh, well-well..

You see, I'm the manager
of this place

and there-there's
a phone call for you.

- Well, who is it?
- It-it-it's your uncle.

My only uncle died
three years ago.

Then you should take the
call
'cause it's probably

really long-distance.

Ah, excuse me for a minute.

I-I'll leave you two
to get better acquainted.

I don't think that's possible.

Why didn't you tell me
you were married?

- It's not that simple.
- You're telling me.

I mean, this will make it
very hard for us.

Carlton, there is no us.

My husband and I are separated

but he called this morning and
we're trying to work things out.

- But yesterday--
- No, I was upset.

And you were so cute.

Well, you made me feel better.

Look, I'm not proud of myself.

I love you.

Oh, Carlton.

It was just one night.

I've been waiting my whole life
for that one night.

I'm so sorry.

So what happens now?

We say goodbye.

Hey, look, Carlton, man.
I'm so..

I didn't..

[instrumental music]

[Will panting]

[Will screaming]

[panting]

You have to go through this
every time you come up here?

No, I take the ladder.

She used me, Will.

Of all the students in all
the universities in the
world

she had to sleep with me.

I feel lower than dirt.

That would be what? Rocks?

Yeah, I feel like rocks.
Really dirty rocks.

You were right, Will.

There's no girl of my dreams.

Hey, Carlton, check it out.

How about we go down

and we discuss this
on solid ground, huh?

I'll buy you some
rocky road, baby.

No.

I'm never coming down.

Carlton, y-you gonna have
to eventually come down.

What happens when you
gotta go to the bathroom?

Down the hall,
third door on your right.

I'm so stupid.

I'm a stupid, dirty rock.

Carlton, man.

Yeah, I've been thinking.

Maybe if I didn't
play you so much

about being a virgin.

Maybe you would've took
things a little slower.

And you would've realized
that Joann wasn't Ms. Right.

Maybe if me and Ms. X had
taken things a little slower.

Maybe we'd be a little better
off than we are right now.

Is the almighty Will
admitting he was wrong?

Well, there's a first time
for everything.

Of course, you know that.

Look, if you don't mind, I
really wanna be alone right now.

Alright, alright.

Hey, y-you mind if I use
the ladder this time?

- Do whatever you want.
- Alright, man.

You don't hate me, do you?

Nah.

It's a nice tree house
you got here, man.

At least you didn't outgrow
your furniture, huh?

[Will screaming]

[cat screeching]

[theme music]

Oh, you know what?

I'll never forget
my first time, man.

It was right before
I went back to..

- Uh, eh, hoo, ha.
- I remember that time.

- You remember that time?
- I remember that time.

- I was there. Uh-huh.
- You was there?

[mumbling]
I remember that time.

- 'I bet she remembers too.'
- 'You are rolling.'

I mess my line up.

(male #1)
That's next year's Emmy

right there.