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YTS.BZ
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Official YIFY movies site:
YTS.BZ
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We emerge
into a panorama from darkness.
4
00:01:02,562 --> 00:01:05,932
Placed inside the parched
badlands of Central Utah,
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00:01:06,833 --> 00:01:08,768
drained and unforgiving.
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00:01:10,703 --> 00:01:13,039
Our attention is drawn
to the hanging tree...
7
00:01:14,307 --> 00:01:16,909
We hear footsteps.
8
00:01:16,910 --> 00:01:18,777
The desperate man enters...
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00:01:21,281 --> 00:01:24,017
In a moment, he will fall.
10
00:01:25,418 --> 00:01:29,489
Just like that.
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00:01:30,123 --> 00:01:34,561
Why? Please, no. Wh...
12
00:01:35,895 --> 00:01:36,963
Why me?
13
00:01:47,273 --> 00:01:48,308
Hello?
14
00:01:50,310 --> 00:01:51,311
Hello?
15
00:01:54,447 --> 00:01:55,448
Please.
16
00:01:56,316 --> 00:01:58,117
There's nobody to hear him.
17
00:01:59,919 --> 00:02:01,087
My name is Wayne...
18
00:02:03,289 --> 00:02:04,524
Wayne Carpenter.
19
00:02:06,359 --> 00:02:09,729
I live on Wild Horse Road,
Pocatello, Idaho.
20
00:02:10,830 --> 00:02:12,465
I'm a high school
English teacher.
21
00:02:13,633 --> 00:02:16,202
We'll say
he was a bank manager.
22
00:02:19,906 --> 00:02:21,141
I'm a bank manager.
23
00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:23,943
No!
24
00:02:24,377 --> 00:02:25,445
English teacher.
25
00:02:26,279 --> 00:02:28,948
Actually,
he was an auto mechanic.
26
00:02:34,087 --> 00:02:35,321
An auto mechanic.
27
00:02:36,523 --> 00:02:38,791
John knew what he had to do.
28
00:03:05,852 --> 00:03:08,321
This is what he had to do.
29
00:03:33,179 --> 00:03:36,516
The desperate man burns.
30
00:05:56,222 --> 00:05:57,990
- Finally,
- Oh, shit, Cody!
31
00:05:58,324 --> 00:05:59,958
- You scared me.
- What took you so long?
32
00:05:59,959 --> 00:06:01,060
Did you go up yet?
33
00:06:01,494 --> 00:06:04,163
I was waiting for his majesty,
the great Grant Beverly.
34
00:06:04,430 --> 00:06:07,767
You don't say.
Well, um, shall we?
35
00:06:11,537 --> 00:06:13,539
Inversion best practices, please?
36
00:06:13,773 --> 00:06:15,541
- Oh, shit.
- There you go.
37
00:06:15,908 --> 00:06:17,009
Fucking climate change
38
00:06:17,310 --> 00:06:19,212
Can you believe
it's supposed to snow later?
39
00:06:19,879 --> 00:06:22,315
Which unit is she in? A? C?
40
00:06:22,749 --> 00:06:24,316
No, she's in Unit B.
41
00:06:24,317 --> 00:06:27,186
Weird that you would say "A"
and then go straight to "C".
42
00:06:27,854 --> 00:06:29,722
Yeah,
what are trying to say?
43
00:06:30,723 --> 00:06:34,226
Nothing,
I just think it's interesting.
44
00:06:34,227 --> 00:06:35,427
I've gotta hand it to you,
45
00:06:35,428 --> 00:06:36,995
I think it's pretty cool,
how you and Wilda have managed
46
00:06:36,996 --> 00:06:38,630
to stay friends
like this, Beverly.
47
00:06:38,631 --> 00:06:40,866
Well, I've heard maintaining
long-term friendships
48
00:06:40,867 --> 00:06:41,734
is important.
49
00:06:42,368 --> 00:06:44,569
I don't know why,
but that's what they say.
50
00:06:44,570 --> 00:06:46,905
Tell me about it. You know
that I've never been dumped,
51
00:06:46,906 --> 00:06:49,374
but if I had, I definitely
wouldn't be as chill about it
52
00:06:49,375 --> 00:06:50,942
- as you and Wilda are.
- Wilda didn't dump me,
53
00:06:50,943 --> 00:06:52,577
it was a mutual parting of ways.
54
00:06:52,578 --> 00:06:53,446
Hmm.
55
00:06:53,946 --> 00:06:55,448
Yeah, I keep forgetting that.
56
00:06:55,648 --> 00:06:58,484
It's probably because people
who say that are full of shit.
57
00:07:02,221 --> 00:07:05,558
Yay! [laughs] Cody! You made it!
58
00:07:06,392 --> 00:07:07,392
Hey, Grant. Hey.
59
00:07:07,393 --> 00:07:08,627
- Hey. Hey.
- Hey.
60
00:07:08,628 --> 00:07:10,630
Oh.
61
00:07:13,499 --> 00:07:15,301
I'm so glad we're still going
on this trip together.
62
00:07:15,635 --> 00:07:17,569
Yeah, I haven't been
to Arches in like, forever.
63
00:07:17,570 --> 00:07:18,837
They took us down there
for an overnight
64
00:07:18,838 --> 00:07:20,972
in middle school, that may
have been the last time.
65
00:07:20,973 --> 00:07:22,307
They drove you rich brats
66
00:07:22,308 --> 00:07:24,042
all the way down there
from Park City?
67
00:07:24,043 --> 00:07:25,744
- Uh, best practice, Wilda?
- Oh, yeah,
68
00:07:25,745 --> 00:07:26,679
sorry, it was just inside.
69
00:07:29,515 --> 00:07:31,049
- Put yours on.
- No.
70
00:07:31,050 --> 00:07:32,284
- Yeah
- No!
71
00:07:32,285 --> 00:07:33,485
God, do you guys
remember the last time
72
00:07:33,486 --> 00:07:35,287
there was inversion so bad,
we actually had to leave
73
00:07:35,288 --> 00:07:37,222
town like this? Like, geez.
74
00:07:37,223 --> 00:07:38,957
- No, we'll be okay.
- The open desert
75
00:07:38,958 --> 00:07:41,593
is our best bet
to avoid the poison air
76
00:07:41,594 --> 00:07:43,662
until the cold weather
can get back on top
77
00:07:43,663 --> 00:07:44,664
of the hot weather.
78
00:07:44,964 --> 00:07:48,233
This is, of course, assuming
that there is enough biocrust
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00:07:48,234 --> 00:07:50,335
left down there to keep
the sand from swirling around
80
00:07:50,336 --> 00:07:52,103
like it's the fucking dust bowl.
81
00:07:52,104 --> 00:07:53,271
I don't understand
82
00:07:53,272 --> 00:07:54,439
what the big deal is.
83
00:07:54,440 --> 00:07:57,242
I mean, inversions happen like,
five times a year.
84
00:07:57,243 --> 00:07:58,810
Yeah, but this isn't one
of the ones that happens
85
00:07:58,811 --> 00:08:01,480
five times a year,
only once every 30 years.
86
00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:03,615
No, 27 years is what I read.
87
00:08:03,616 --> 00:08:04,884
Where'd you read that?
88
00:08:05,485 --> 00:08:06,686
On a website.
89
00:08:07,019 --> 00:08:08,720
And remind me,
why we're not just going up
90
00:08:08,721 --> 00:08:10,156
to the lake with everyone else?
91
00:08:10,356 --> 00:08:11,957
You know, Mel, Franky
and Vanessa said,
92
00:08:11,958 --> 00:08:13,291
it's like spring break
up there right now.
93
00:08:13,292 --> 00:08:14,293
- Aw!
- It's because
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00:08:14,494 --> 00:08:16,828
you don't know shit about
how the world works, Beverly.
95
00:08:16,829 --> 00:08:19,130
Once the inversion breaks
and the air shifts north,
96
00:08:19,131 --> 00:08:21,533
that Bear Lake Air
is gonna be, like, 30 percent
97
00:08:21,534 --> 00:08:23,134
copper-fracking jizz
from Kennecott--
98
00:08:23,135 --> 00:08:24,870
No!
No more climate change talk
99
00:08:24,871 --> 00:08:27,173
on this trip, Cody.
It freaks me out, okay?
100
00:08:27,473 --> 00:08:29,274
- The inversion's bad enough.
- Yeah.
101
00:08:29,275 --> 00:08:32,277
It's like a mini-Chernobyl
fantasy camp weekend
102
00:08:32,278 --> 00:08:34,279
- or something.
- Hey, it is not my fault
103
00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:36,515
that there are polygamist UFO
cult forefathers
104
00:08:36,516 --> 00:08:38,283
built this city
in the low valley under what is
105
00:08:38,284 --> 00:08:41,354
the meteorological equivalent
of the Bermuda fucking triangle.
106
00:08:46,826 --> 00:08:49,729
- Did you get gas?
- Yeah, I got gas.
107
00:08:49,996 --> 00:08:51,731
Hey, why'd you park so far away?
108
00:08:52,331 --> 00:08:53,632
Hey, don't worry, Grant.
109
00:08:53,633 --> 00:08:55,333
The desert will be...
will be fun.
110
00:08:55,334 --> 00:08:57,770
You can pretend,
you're on the Star Wars planet.
111
00:08:58,237 --> 00:08:59,505
Which Star Wars planet?
112
00:09:00,139 --> 00:09:03,375
Guessing you probably mean
either Tatooine or Jakku--
113
00:09:03,376 --> 00:09:05,143
No, it's...
it's the sand worm one.
114
00:09:05,144 --> 00:09:06,412
What is that called? Dune?
115
00:09:07,046 --> 00:09:09,948
Huh. That's Arrakis,
and that's not even Star Wars.
116
00:09:09,949 --> 00:09:11,850
Jesus, Wilda.
117
00:09:11,851 --> 00:09:14,419
I promise, you do not wanna
get Beverly started
118
00:09:14,420 --> 00:09:16,521
on his George Lucas bullshit.
119
00:09:16,522 --> 00:09:18,690
I think Grant's kinda cute
when he goes on his little rants
120
00:09:18,691 --> 00:09:20,358
about ass-prick ratios,
121
00:09:20,359 --> 00:09:22,193
- or whatever--
- Aspect ratios!
122
00:09:22,194 --> 00:09:24,363
That's what I said,
ass-prick ratios.
123
00:09:24,697 --> 00:09:27,165
God, you learn so much dating
a film major for three years.
124
00:09:27,166 --> 00:09:30,502
Yeah, it sounds cool
if you like low-T beta cucks
125
00:09:30,503 --> 00:09:34,606
and not super-masculine,
conscientiously progressive
126
00:09:34,607 --> 00:09:36,942
- environmental studies majors.
- Wow.
127
00:09:36,943 --> 00:09:39,645
I can already tell this trip
is gonna be intense.
128
00:09:40,346 --> 00:09:42,515
Get it? "In tents."
129
00:09:42,949 --> 00:09:48,353
Oh, no. No, I'm declaring this
evacuation-slash-weekend-getaway
130
00:09:48,354 --> 00:09:50,455
- a pun-free zone
- What? No!
131
00:09:50,456 --> 00:09:52,757
- Yeah.
- Boo! Boo... Boo him, Cody!
132
00:09:52,758 --> 00:09:55,761
- Boo!
- Boo, Beverly fucking sucks.
133
00:09:56,128 --> 00:09:58,897
- What is this piece of shit?
- Careful, that's vintage!
134
00:09:58,898 --> 00:10:00,632
- Yeah, but what is it?
- Nothing.
135
00:10:00,633 --> 00:10:02,467
My, my folks had to get rid
of a bunch of stuff.
136
00:10:02,468 --> 00:10:03,902
When they
downsized to the condo.
137
00:10:03,903 --> 00:10:05,804
There was a bunch of cool
old TV equipment
138
00:10:05,805 --> 00:10:07,238
from my grandad's
Channel 2 days.
139
00:10:07,239 --> 00:10:09,674
- Yeah? Does it even work?
- There's no tape in it.
140
00:10:09,675 --> 00:10:10,676
Yo, lemme see.
141
00:10:13,846 --> 00:10:14,747
Whoa!
142
00:10:15,748 --> 00:10:17,382
Do you think
your grandparents ever used this
143
00:10:17,383 --> 00:10:19,784
- to make a sexual tape?
- Ugh.
144
00:10:19,785 --> 00:10:23,121
No, do not make me think
about old people fucking.
145
00:10:23,122 --> 00:10:26,458
Why not? Grant's grandma is hot.
And pee-paw?
146
00:10:26,459 --> 00:10:27,993
He's, like,
a legit Salt Lake "8".
147
00:10:27,994 --> 00:10:30,329
They did not let uggos on TV
in the Reagan era.
148
00:10:30,563 --> 00:10:33,465
Wait, no, you're wrong,
there, there's a tape in here.
149
00:10:33,466 --> 00:10:34,933
- Don't mess with it!
- It looks like
150
00:10:34,934 --> 00:10:36,968
we can play it back.
Do you wanna see what's on it--
151
00:10:36,969 --> 00:10:37,936
Don't!
152
00:10:37,937 --> 00:10:39,237
Why not, Beverly?
153
00:10:39,238 --> 00:10:40,840
What are we gonna find on here?
154
00:10:41,674 --> 00:10:44,476
Well, he's just worried
because it's fragile.
155
00:10:44,477 --> 00:10:45,610
Well, if it's so fragile
156
00:10:45,611 --> 00:10:47,480
then why are we taking it
to the desert?
157
00:10:48,514 --> 00:10:50,682
Well, um,
I was gonna bring this up later,
158
00:10:50,683 --> 00:10:53,885
but, do you guys remember the
24-hour film thing I sent you?
159
00:10:53,886 --> 00:10:54,787
- No.
- Yeah.
160
00:10:55,021 --> 00:10:57,989
No! We are not doing homework
on this weekend, okay?
161
00:10:57,990 --> 00:11:00,959
This trip is about two things,
and two things only.
162
00:11:00,960 --> 00:11:03,662
One, to practice
being climate refugees
163
00:11:03,663 --> 00:11:05,463
which we will all be
in a few years.
164
00:11:05,464 --> 00:11:06,898
- Ugh.
- And two,
165
00:11:06,899 --> 00:11:09,067
getting rat shit,
fucking hammered
166
00:11:09,068 --> 00:11:10,602
- in the desert.
- Yeah.
167
00:11:10,603 --> 00:11:11,970
Well, it's not for class.
168
00:11:11,971 --> 00:11:14,739
It... it's for an analog media
short film festival.
169
00:11:14,740 --> 00:11:17,742
A really cool one,
actually, out of Seattle.
170
00:11:17,743 --> 00:11:20,545
- Mm, cool.
- True, super cool.
171
00:11:20,546 --> 00:11:22,380
Hey, um,
if you think for one second
172
00:11:22,381 --> 00:11:23,915
that we're going to
lug that thing all the way
173
00:11:23,916 --> 00:11:26,318
to Delicate Arch,
you're dead wrong.
174
00:11:26,652 --> 00:11:28,920
Oh, and, uh,
did you remind your cousin
175
00:11:28,921 --> 00:11:31,190
that I was not kidding
about bringing sunscreen?
176
00:11:31,524 --> 00:11:32,391
Yeah.
177
00:11:32,758 --> 00:11:34,726
Although, hopefully they
didn't think it was code
178
00:11:34,727 --> 00:11:36,394
for like, angel dust
or something.
179
00:11:47,707 --> 00:11:51,076
Ferg! My Fergie-wergie!
180
00:11:51,077 --> 00:11:54,779
Wilda! What up, cuz?
181
00:11:54,780 --> 00:11:57,749
Don't tell me that whole cooler
is full of booze and drugs.
182
00:11:57,750 --> 00:12:00,352
Oh, it is.
183
00:12:00,753 --> 00:12:02,921
This whole cooler
is full of booze and drugs.
184
00:12:02,922 --> 00:12:04,689
Hey, the inversion's
coming down pretty hard,
185
00:12:04,690 --> 00:12:06,725
- don't get any in your eyes!
- Just how fucked up
186
00:12:06,726 --> 00:12:07,859
are you planning on
getting down there?
187
00:12:07,860 --> 00:12:10,496
What, I can't hear you, dude.
188
00:12:13,933 --> 00:12:16,235
Whoa, automatic!
189
00:12:23,809 --> 00:12:25,945
- How you doin'?
- I'm okay.
190
00:12:27,947 --> 00:12:28,948
What's that?
191
00:12:29,615 --> 00:12:32,417
Fucked up, right?
So, Grant's me-maw and pee-paw
192
00:12:32,418 --> 00:12:35,520
used this to make porn parodies
of CBS Sunday Morning.
193
00:12:35,521 --> 00:12:36,988
Oh, really?
That's cool as hell, dude.
194
00:12:36,989 --> 00:12:39,057
Oh, my god,
have you ever seen that show?
195
00:12:39,058 --> 00:12:40,792
All the anchors look
like they're fucking melting--
196
00:12:40,793 --> 00:12:44,129
Okay!
197
00:12:44,130 --> 00:12:45,798
"Careful, it's vintage!"
198
00:12:50,102 --> 00:12:51,703
Bruh,
these influencer bitches
199
00:12:51,704 --> 00:12:53,172
get like, free everything.
200
00:12:53,405 --> 00:12:56,542
I really need some sort of
marketable social media gimmick.
201
00:12:56,742 --> 00:12:57,977
Mm, like what?
202
00:12:58,744 --> 00:13:01,747
I don't know.
Like, what about wellness?
203
00:13:02,782 --> 00:13:05,183
But like, like spooky?
204
00:13:05,184 --> 00:13:06,951
- Spooky wellness?
- Yeah like,
205
00:13:06,952 --> 00:13:09,554
"Put this yogurt
in your pussy hole."
206
00:13:11,991 --> 00:13:14,326
People love Halloween
and people love wellness.
207
00:13:15,127 --> 00:13:16,862
Oh!
208
00:13:17,329 --> 00:13:18,830
What do you think
of the name "Creep Heap"?
209
00:13:33,045 --> 00:13:34,846
Fucking social media.
210
00:13:34,847 --> 00:13:36,681
I hate our fucking generation.
211
00:13:36,682 --> 00:13:40,785
We are so detached from like,
reality and ecology and shit.
212
00:13:40,786 --> 00:13:43,022
I mean, fuck us, we suck.
213
00:13:43,422 --> 00:13:44,957
Yeah, but like, dude.
214
00:13:45,624 --> 00:13:49,028
I mean, what if there was
no reality to be attached to?
215
00:13:49,695 --> 00:13:51,830
You know, it's pretty arrogant
to assume that any of this
216
00:13:51,831 --> 00:13:53,165
is actually happening.
217
00:13:53,365 --> 00:13:58,137
Or has,
or will ever happen, you know?
218
00:13:58,470 --> 00:14:01,306
I obviously, consider myself
something of an expert
219
00:14:01,307 --> 00:14:03,876
on transitory states
and being and yo.
220
00:14:04,310 --> 00:14:08,146
I mean, a keen spiritual depth
might actually have the ability
221
00:14:08,147 --> 00:14:09,248
to bend time and space...
222
00:14:22,161 --> 00:14:24,996
Oh, shit, dude!
223
00:14:24,997 --> 00:14:26,498
- What the fuck, ha--
- Beverly?
224
00:14:26,832 --> 00:14:29,067
Was there a deer or something?
225
00:14:29,068 --> 00:14:30,468
What, Beverly hit a deer?
226
00:14:30,469 --> 00:14:31,670
Did you guys feel that?
227
00:14:32,037 --> 00:14:33,105
Feel what?
228
00:14:33,572 --> 00:14:34,673
It just changed.
229
00:14:36,175 --> 00:14:37,409
What changed?
230
00:14:38,711 --> 00:14:42,081
I don't know. The... the road?
The... the... the light?
231
00:14:42,481 --> 00:14:44,516
Everything. I...
232
00:14:44,750 --> 00:14:46,585
How long have we
been driving for?
233
00:14:46,952 --> 00:14:48,554
Ah, like, a couple of hours.
234
00:14:49,388 --> 00:14:51,823
Are you okay to drive, dude?
Like, maybe I should drive?
235
00:14:51,824 --> 00:14:52,758
- No.
- No!
236
00:14:53,225 --> 00:14:55,394
Uh, yeah, sure, maybe, yeah.
237
00:14:56,528 --> 00:14:58,597
- Oh, well...
- Incoming!
238
00:15:00,366 --> 00:15:02,768
- Just go.
- Okay, let me get out first!
239
00:15:22,154 --> 00:15:23,389
Water, dude?
240
00:15:23,989 --> 00:15:25,090
I'm fine.
241
00:15:25,591 --> 00:15:27,593
- I guess if you need a second--
- I'm fine!
242
00:15:30,896 --> 00:15:32,864
Grant, why don't you
grab your camera?
243
00:15:32,865 --> 00:15:35,000
We should be taping this,
for posterity.
244
00:15:35,434 --> 00:15:38,270
Oh, uh, yeah, okay.
245
00:15:39,004 --> 00:15:42,107
Uh, well I guess... like...
246
00:15:42,808 --> 00:15:46,278
Ferg, what are your plans
for this trip?
247
00:15:46,712 --> 00:15:49,248
I mean, on paper,
to escape the inversion.
248
00:15:49,882 --> 00:15:52,317
But if I'm being honest,
my true objective
249
00:15:52,318 --> 00:15:54,452
is to seize the time
to further develop
250
00:15:54,453 --> 00:15:58,290
my own proprietary set
of Theosophical studies.
251
00:15:58,624 --> 00:16:01,459
Oh, which, for now I'm calling
"Phase Perception".
252
00:16:01,460 --> 00:16:03,795
And let me guess,
does this research involve
253
00:16:03,796 --> 00:16:05,430
the use
of controlled substances?
254
00:16:05,431 --> 00:16:07,131
I mean, now that you mention it,
255
00:16:07,132 --> 00:16:08,199
yeah, I did pack a few...
256
00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:09,901
...holy Theosophical tools.
257
00:16:09,902 --> 00:16:12,170
I just don't understand
why we're not going to the lake?
258
00:16:12,171 --> 00:16:14,038
I mean Vanessa,
Franky and Mel said it's like
259
00:16:14,039 --> 00:16:16,274
- spring break up there.
- That's what they told me!
260
00:16:16,275 --> 00:16:19,911
I have said a million times
why we are going to the desert.
261
00:16:19,912 --> 00:16:22,480
Yeah, but, dude.
I mean, we could be chilling
262
00:16:22,481 --> 00:16:23,948
with like,
the hottest people under 30
263
00:16:23,949 --> 00:16:25,116
in the Salt Lake Valley.
264
00:16:25,117 --> 00:16:28,152
Not shit, fuck alone
in the middle of nowhere
265
00:16:28,153 --> 00:16:30,922
with you two fuckos
and the one token female.
266
00:16:30,923 --> 00:16:32,824
What?
I don't even get a name now?
267
00:16:32,825 --> 00:16:34,459
Okay, you get two names.
268
00:16:34,460 --> 00:16:36,961
The Ferg's cousin
and Grant's ex-girlfriend.
269
00:16:36,962 --> 00:16:38,129
All right, why don't you
270
00:16:38,130 --> 00:16:41,833
"phase perceive" my fist
as I shove it up your ass
271
00:16:41,834 --> 00:16:43,468
and pull out your piss plumbing?
272
00:16:44,670 --> 00:16:46,304
Dude, Grant, your woman
just threatened
273
00:16:46,305 --> 00:16:48,539
- to fist me to death.
- Sorry pal,
274
00:16:48,540 --> 00:16:51,810
she's not my problem anymore.
275
00:16:52,311 --> 00:16:53,812
- True.
- Yeah.
276
00:16:54,013 --> 00:16:55,346
Plus, there's some soil samples
277
00:16:55,347 --> 00:16:57,348
I need to get
up at the arches, anyways.
278
00:16:57,349 --> 00:16:58,217
Oh.
279
00:16:59,218 --> 00:17:02,187
- I thought you said no homework.
- It's not homework...
280
00:17:02,988 --> 00:17:05,189
It's for a...
for a personal project
281
00:17:05,190 --> 00:17:06,424
that I'm working on.
282
00:17:06,425 --> 00:17:09,694
Like how my analog shorts thing
isn't homework, either?
283
00:17:09,695 --> 00:17:12,964
- Wait, what's he talking about?
- Grant wants to make a movie.
284
00:17:12,965 --> 00:17:15,266
How fun! Wait,
is this gonna be like the one
285
00:17:15,267 --> 00:17:17,568
where Cody was in the bathtub
with all the fake blood?
286
00:17:17,569 --> 00:17:20,338
Hopefully not,
Otherwise, you'll have this
287
00:17:20,339 --> 00:17:21,839
stressed out motherfucker
yelling at you
288
00:17:21,840 --> 00:17:23,541
for even daring to breathe!
289
00:17:23,542 --> 00:17:24,976
You were
supposed to be a corpse!
290
00:17:24,977 --> 00:17:27,678
And you just kept making Wilda
just, repeat her line
291
00:17:27,679 --> 00:17:32,183
- over and over and over again.
- Oh my God, Kevin!
292
00:17:32,184 --> 00:17:35,420
Why did you do this?
Why did you do this?
293
00:17:35,421 --> 00:17:36,922
- To me?
- To me.
294
00:17:38,824 --> 00:17:40,124
Do you guys remember when Ferg
295
00:17:40,125 --> 00:17:41,526
almost knocked over
the friggin' light?
296
00:17:41,527 --> 00:17:43,528
Grant forgot to put
the other sandbag on it!
297
00:17:43,529 --> 00:17:44,929
- Mm.
- It was an LED light,
298
00:17:44,930 --> 00:17:47,732
you wouldn't have been
electrocuted, probably.
299
00:17:47,733 --> 00:17:50,869
Oh my god, Kevin!
Why did you do this?
300
00:17:51,236 --> 00:17:56,275
- Why did you do this... to me?
- Kevin, aw.
301
00:17:57,209 --> 00:18:00,145
Mm, mon dieu, Kevin.
302
00:18:00,446 --> 00:18:01,713
Et pourquoi?
303
00:18:04,049 --> 00:18:06,284
Oh, come on, Grant, don't sulk.
304
00:18:06,285 --> 00:18:08,487
I liked that video,
it was actually really good.
305
00:18:08,754 --> 00:18:09,954
Well, it would've been
even better
306
00:18:09,955 --> 00:18:11,089
if you all just listened to me,
307
00:18:11,090 --> 00:18:13,058
instead of constantly
bitching and goofing off.
308
00:18:14,059 --> 00:18:14,927
Oh, boy...
309
00:18:15,861 --> 00:18:17,796
Hey, Grant,
look at me, look at me.
310
00:18:19,264 --> 00:18:22,066
Hey, trust me, Grant,
this trip is gonna be fun.
311
00:18:46,592 --> 00:18:48,360
- Oh, my God, what's wrong?
- Wha... I...
312
00:18:50,062 --> 00:18:52,297
- Where are we?
- What do you mean? We just ate.
313
00:18:52,798 --> 00:18:54,298
Seriously, are you feeling okay?
314
00:18:54,299 --> 00:18:56,735
I'm fine. Sorry, I just...
315
00:18:58,170 --> 00:18:59,837
I'm a...
I'm a little dizzy, I guess.
316
00:18:59,838 --> 00:19:01,740
Oh, hey.
317
00:19:02,307 --> 00:19:03,508
I mean here, take these.
318
00:19:03,509 --> 00:19:05,209
Um, I don't know
if that's a good idea.
319
00:19:05,210 --> 00:19:07,378
- What are they?
- Oh, don't worry about it, dude.
320
00:19:07,379 --> 00:19:09,780
We just gotta get
your orgone back to stasis.
321
00:19:09,781 --> 00:19:12,217
- Maybe I should just take one?
- Yeah.
322
00:19:12,484 --> 00:19:14,552
'Cause Beverly
is such a drug milksop,
323
00:19:14,553 --> 00:19:15,987
that you'd probably kill him.
324
00:19:15,988 --> 00:19:17,989
Stop calling me Beverly!
Ferg, tell this asshole
325
00:19:17,990 --> 00:19:20,191
how fucked up all his
gendered name calling shit is.
326
00:19:20,192 --> 00:19:21,560
Wait, why is that my job?
327
00:19:25,364 --> 00:19:26,697
- Grant, don't!
- Hell yeah, dude.
328
00:19:26,698 --> 00:19:28,800
That is what
I'm fuckin' talking about!
329
00:19:29,034 --> 00:19:30,301
This could be a real problem
330
00:19:30,302 --> 00:19:32,236
No, no, no, no, no.
Don't worry about it.
331
00:19:32,237 --> 00:19:34,305
I mean, if he starts
to freak out, I'll just gag him
332
00:19:34,306 --> 00:19:35,873
with one of these choppy boys
and make him barf
333
00:19:35,874 --> 00:19:37,241
- them shits right up--
- Careful!
334
00:19:37,242 --> 00:19:39,178
You're gonna stab
my eyes out with that thing.
335
00:19:40,045 --> 00:19:42,781
- Sorry.
- Come on, it's getting late.
336
00:19:43,582 --> 00:19:44,683
We should go.
337
00:19:50,989 --> 00:19:52,057
Wait.
338
00:19:53,892 --> 00:19:56,494
Hey, let me read the fortune...
339
00:19:58,564 --> 00:20:01,832
We linger
for a breath to remember exactly
340
00:20:01,833 --> 00:20:03,702
what this moment looked like...
341
00:20:10,342 --> 00:20:12,143
The four happy campers
342
00:20:12,144 --> 00:20:14,846
pull out of their spot
and disappear...
343
00:20:18,450 --> 00:20:20,518
...out of frame.
344
00:20:36,602 --> 00:20:38,436
I don't see anyone,
shouldn't there be like
345
00:20:38,437 --> 00:20:41,006
a sticker or a slip of paper
or something?
346
00:20:41,573 --> 00:20:44,176
Forget about it, just go in.
347
00:20:45,043 --> 00:20:46,745
All right.
348
00:20:57,222 --> 00:20:59,258
Guys,
it literally says "No camping".
349
00:20:59,591 --> 00:21:02,094
Nerd!
350
00:21:02,761 --> 00:21:03,761
Okay, fine.
351
00:21:03,762 --> 00:21:08,667
We'll go past the sign
that says "No camping".
352
00:21:19,278 --> 00:21:22,213
A 43-year-old school teacher
from Pocatello, Idaho,
353
00:21:22,214 --> 00:21:24,116
who has now been missing
since Thursday evening.
354
00:21:24,683 --> 00:21:26,351
Authorities are baffled by--
355
00:21:26,652 --> 00:21:28,152
God, this is so creepy.
356
00:21:28,153 --> 00:21:30,288
Well, like you said,
everybody went to the lake.
357
00:21:30,289 --> 00:21:32,456
Yeah, but still there should be
someone else here, right?
358
00:21:32,457 --> 00:21:35,060
Well, it doesn't really matter
'cause we're going off the grid.
359
00:21:35,327 --> 00:21:37,295
- Back to nature.
- This is sick,
360
00:21:37,296 --> 00:21:39,364
I mean we can literally do
whatever we want out here.
361
00:21:40,365 --> 00:21:43,167
The desert is ours!
362
00:21:43,168 --> 00:21:46,104
"Don't do it Kevin,
you have so much to live for!"
363
00:21:48,373 --> 00:21:49,775
Hey, wake up, Grant.
364
00:22:17,002 --> 00:22:18,303
Um,
365
00:22:19,037 --> 00:22:20,405
why are there only two tents?
366
00:22:21,006 --> 00:22:23,107
Oh, I didn't bring one.
I was just gonna sleep out
367
00:22:23,108 --> 00:22:24,542
under the stars
and vibe with the fauna
368
00:22:24,543 --> 00:22:26,044
like a fucking G, dude.
369
00:22:27,879 --> 00:22:30,349
Uh... oh...
370
00:22:31,650 --> 00:22:34,318
Whoops, I think I accidentally
brought two sleeping bags
371
00:22:34,319 --> 00:22:35,520
and no tent.
372
00:22:36,488 --> 00:22:38,523
- So--
- Great, so what's the plan then?
373
00:22:38,990 --> 00:22:39,958
Well...
374
00:22:41,526 --> 00:22:42,894
Whatever you two geeks decide,
375
00:22:43,228 --> 00:22:45,297
we best get situated
before nightfall.
376
00:22:50,335 --> 00:22:52,403
I mean, my tent's pretty big
377
00:22:52,404 --> 00:22:53,738
and it's not like
we haven't, you know--
378
00:22:53,739 --> 00:22:55,173
I don't think
that's a good idea.
379
00:22:56,241 --> 00:22:57,375
No, yeah, totally.
380
00:22:57,376 --> 00:22:59,845
We, we agreed we wanted
to keep things cool between us.
381
00:23:00,412 --> 00:23:03,081
With simple,
clear boundaries, right?
382
00:23:04,916 --> 00:23:06,618
Totally, totally.
383
00:23:08,253 --> 00:23:10,054
Um, well
you take the tent then.
384
00:23:10,055 --> 00:23:11,456
I'll just... I'll sleep
in the back of the truck.
385
00:23:11,690 --> 00:23:13,325
Oh, no,
I'll take the car, it's cool.
386
00:23:14,459 --> 00:23:17,095
- Suit yourself.
- Yay.
387
00:23:17,629 --> 00:23:19,264
Um, and I'm, I'm totally gonna,
388
00:23:19,898 --> 00:23:22,401
fill it with queefs and farts, okay?
389
00:23:22,601 --> 00:23:24,736
Okay, great, perfect.
390
00:23:26,538 --> 00:23:28,340
Uh, what's Ferg doing now?
391
00:23:33,378 --> 00:23:35,414
Yeah, get some!
392
00:23:36,114 --> 00:23:37,449
Must run in the family.
393
00:23:38,216 --> 00:23:39,884
It... it does, actually
394
00:23:39,885 --> 00:23:41,886
It's... It's kind of a serious
medical condition
395
00:23:41,887 --> 00:23:43,221
that needs more awareness.
396
00:23:43,755 --> 00:23:45,424
So, spread the word.
397
00:24:10,482 --> 00:24:11,749
What'd you see up there?
398
00:24:11,750 --> 00:24:14,286
Uh, miles and miles
of fuck-nothing.
399
00:24:14,820 --> 00:24:17,856
So, dude, like what's going on
with you and Cody lately?
400
00:24:18,457 --> 00:24:20,090
You know it's,
it's a real bummer
401
00:24:20,091 --> 00:24:21,525
seeing you guys
be such dicks to each other--
402
00:24:21,526 --> 00:24:22,827
I, I don't know
what you're talking about.
403
00:24:22,828 --> 00:24:24,763
I mean, I don't like
this version of you guys, I...
404
00:24:25,464 --> 00:24:27,331
You know, I like the version
that calls in
405
00:24:27,332 --> 00:24:29,534
fucking bomb threats on the
Ogden Valley Church Ball League,
406
00:24:29,768 --> 00:24:31,436
- dude.
- Oh, yeah, that was...
407
00:24:32,003 --> 00:24:33,537
that was just to get some
swat team B-roll
408
00:24:33,538 --> 00:24:35,306
- for a class project.
- Oh, yeah?
409
00:24:35,307 --> 00:24:36,707
Got an "A" on that project, too.
410
00:24:36,708 --> 00:24:41,146
See? You guys are legendary.
411
00:25:01,800 --> 00:25:05,436
So, it turns out, the woman
that we thought was being chased
412
00:25:05,437 --> 00:25:07,905
by all these
mindless cell phone zombies,
413
00:25:07,906 --> 00:25:08,973
is actually--
414
00:25:08,974 --> 00:25:10,908
A child killer whose mind
is being erased each day
415
00:25:10,909 --> 00:25:12,810
just to torture her?
416
00:25:12,811 --> 00:25:15,479
Well, fuck...
if you guys knew the whole story
417
00:25:15,480 --> 00:25:17,181
then why'd you let me sit here
and go on and on
418
00:25:17,182 --> 00:25:18,282
like an asshole?
419
00:25:18,283 --> 00:25:20,050
Well, to be fair I don't know
if telling the plot
420
00:25:20,051 --> 00:25:22,486
of an old Black Mirror episode
really counts as a ghost story.
421
00:25:22,487 --> 00:25:24,989
Well, apparently,
I am not allowed to talk about
422
00:25:24,990 --> 00:25:27,525
what's actually scary like,
oh, I don't know,
423
00:25:27,526 --> 00:25:30,060
the fact that we won't have
any potable water on the planet
424
00:25:30,061 --> 00:25:32,463
- by the year 2040--
- Boo!
425
00:25:32,464 --> 00:25:33,998
And what about Ferg?
426
00:25:33,999 --> 00:25:36,233
All they did was
read the Wikipedia article
427
00:25:36,234 --> 00:25:38,769
for the Slender Man killings,
word for word.
428
00:25:38,770 --> 00:25:40,604
Uh, you don't think
that shit's scary?
429
00:25:40,605 --> 00:25:41,540
Mm-mm.
430
00:25:41,940 --> 00:25:43,140
Must be nice
431
00:25:43,141 --> 00:25:45,943
No, I'm serious I mean, that's,
that's a textbook example
432
00:25:45,944 --> 00:25:47,778
of magical thinking IRL.
433
00:25:47,779 --> 00:25:50,714
Of pulling a constructed image
and making it manifest
434
00:25:50,715 --> 00:25:54,185
- into our reality, like--
- Please, no, I can't.
435
00:25:55,520 --> 00:25:56,688
You're up, Wilda.
436
00:25:57,355 --> 00:25:59,323
What? Oh, I don't,
I don't know any ghost stories.
437
00:25:59,324 --> 00:26:02,092
Come on, you got to tell us
one, even if it sucks.
438
00:26:02,093 --> 00:26:03,394
Seriously, I don't know any.
439
00:26:03,395 --> 00:26:04,762
You should tell them
about how you grew up
440
00:26:04,763 --> 00:26:06,498
next door to a serial killer.
441
00:26:06,932 --> 00:26:09,199
You are such a dick, Grant.
442
00:26:09,200 --> 00:26:11,535
What? When? I didn't know that.
443
00:26:11,536 --> 00:26:13,604
Honestly, it's like the single,
most interesting thing
444
00:26:13,605 --> 00:26:15,206
about you.
445
00:26:16,107 --> 00:26:19,277
It's not even like a story,
okay? It's just a fact.
446
00:26:23,882 --> 00:26:25,816
Okay, so my family lived
in Brigham City,
447
00:26:25,817 --> 00:26:27,619
for a couple years
when I was growing up.
448
00:26:28,587 --> 00:26:31,122
And the guy who lives
in the house next to us...
449
00:26:32,891 --> 00:26:35,193
I guess he, like,
killed a couple people.
450
00:26:35,594 --> 00:26:37,829
But like, not even
in the house we lived by.
451
00:26:38,396 --> 00:26:40,431
Richard Cruz Debussy.
452
00:26:40,432 --> 00:26:43,801
He was legit, Last Podcast
even did an episode on him.
453
00:26:43,802 --> 00:26:44,936
Look it up, Ferg.
454
00:26:46,071 --> 00:26:47,138
Okay.
455
00:26:49,240 --> 00:26:50,375
I got it.
456
00:26:50,909 --> 00:26:54,011
Richard Cruz Debussy
AKA the "Loop Slayer"...
457
00:26:55,213 --> 00:26:56,814
...was an American serial killer
458
00:26:56,815 --> 00:26:59,451
active in Nevada
and western Utah from...
459
00:26:59,951 --> 00:27:01,919
Holy shit, dude!
I remember this.
460
00:27:01,920 --> 00:27:03,787
- He escaped from prison, right?
- Yeah, a week before
461
00:27:03,788 --> 00:27:06,090
he was supposed to go in front
of the firing squad, too.
462
00:27:06,091 --> 00:27:08,693
- They never caught him either.
- They never caught him?
463
00:27:08,927 --> 00:27:11,095
Fuck.
464
00:27:11,096 --> 00:27:12,630
He was already really old, though.
465
00:27:12,631 --> 00:27:14,032
There's no way he's alive now.
466
00:27:14,432 --> 00:27:16,300
What makes you
such a fucking expert?
467
00:27:16,301 --> 00:27:18,168
It was big news!
And, and my grandpa,
468
00:27:18,169 --> 00:27:19,570
he, he won
the Rocky Mountain Pulitzer
469
00:27:19,571 --> 00:27:20,804
for reporting on the trial.
470
00:27:20,805 --> 00:27:22,306
right before he retired
from Channel 2.
471
00:27:22,307 --> 00:27:24,308
Guys, this isn't, like,
fun for me, okay?
472
00:27:24,309 --> 00:27:26,011
I can see this guy
in my memory...
473
00:27:27,345 --> 00:27:30,848
He had these big glasses...
weird mustache...
474
00:27:31,950 --> 00:27:34,318
He always wore this big,
green hunting jacket
475
00:27:34,319 --> 00:27:35,420
in the middle of winter.
476
00:27:35,854 --> 00:27:39,057
He'd wave at us from his mailbox
while we were playing outside...
477
00:27:45,063 --> 00:27:46,463
It's weird, I don't know,
478
00:27:46,464 --> 00:27:50,300
it's like creepy flashbacks
from some shitty horror movie.
479
00:27:50,301 --> 00:27:52,737
Interesting. What if they are?
480
00:27:53,338 --> 00:27:54,438
What?
481
00:27:54,439 --> 00:27:56,641
What if they are just
bad horror movie flashbacks?
482
00:27:57,142 --> 00:27:59,310
I don't know.
I don't understand.
483
00:27:59,678 --> 00:28:01,646
Okay, like this, right now.
484
00:28:02,313 --> 00:28:05,450
What if we're actually
in a horror movie?
485
00:28:06,217 --> 00:28:09,620
Four annoying college kids,
alone in the desert,
486
00:28:09,621 --> 00:28:11,722
just waiting
to get picked off, one by one.
487
00:28:11,723 --> 00:28:13,357
Don't you think
it's a little convenient,
488
00:28:13,358 --> 00:28:15,092
that we're the only ones
out here?
489
00:28:15,093 --> 00:28:16,294
Grant, don't.
490
00:28:16,728 --> 00:28:18,730
You know how tweaked out
Ferg gets with all that
491
00:28:19,064 --> 00:28:22,032
Philip K. Dick "questioning
the nature of reality" shit.
492
00:28:22,033 --> 00:28:24,169
I mean, this is exactly
what I'm talking about.
493
00:28:24,903 --> 00:28:26,070
"Phase Perception."
494
00:28:26,071 --> 00:28:28,338
A million different things
could show up
495
00:28:28,339 --> 00:28:30,074
and kill us at any moment.
496
00:28:30,075 --> 00:28:33,211
Like, a hoard
of irradiated zombies.
497
00:28:33,545 --> 00:28:36,046
You know, Central Utah
is where like, 90 percent
498
00:28:36,047 --> 00:28:38,015
of America's toxic waste
is stored, right?
499
00:28:38,016 --> 00:28:40,485
- Jesus, fuck no!
- Or aliens.
500
00:28:40,685 --> 00:28:43,221
I mean, Area 51
is not too far from here.
501
00:28:43,521 --> 00:28:45,923
Oh, man, fucking aliens?
502
00:28:45,924 --> 00:28:47,725
You know those guys
fucking love the desert.
503
00:28:47,726 --> 00:28:50,694
- Guys, can we not?
- No, Wilda's right.
504
00:28:50,695 --> 00:28:53,732
The Four Corners
are a legendary UFO hotspot.
505
00:28:53,932 --> 00:28:55,866
Why do you think
all these satanic biker cults
506
00:28:55,867 --> 00:28:57,234
like it around here so much?
507
00:28:57,235 --> 00:29:01,105
Uh, satanic biker cults, huh?
But why?
508
00:29:01,106 --> 00:29:02,306
Jesus Christ, you guys
509
00:29:02,307 --> 00:29:05,442
are the biggest group of fucking
idiot nerds on the planet.
510
00:29:05,443 --> 00:29:06,543
Actually.
511
00:29:06,544 --> 00:29:08,980
I'm the stock geek protagonist.
512
00:29:13,151 --> 00:29:16,053
You're the alpha-jerk bully.
Ferg is the stoner comic relief.
513
00:29:16,054 --> 00:29:17,622
And Wilda...
514
00:29:18,890 --> 00:29:22,827
Wilda is "the girl."
515
00:29:24,696 --> 00:29:25,829
I am not just "the girl."
516
00:29:25,830 --> 00:29:27,698
That's exactly what
that kind of underwritten
517
00:29:27,699 --> 00:29:28,966
female character might say.
518
00:29:28,967 --> 00:29:32,703
"I'm not just the girl."
That's classic.
519
00:29:32,704 --> 00:29:34,372
Let me guess the twist ending.
520
00:29:34,906 --> 00:29:37,475
You go around and cut
each of our heads off, huh?
521
00:29:38,009 --> 00:29:39,911
No, that would be "hack."
522
00:29:41,479 --> 00:29:44,616
What's that dick donut for?
523
00:29:44,849 --> 00:29:46,985
This is reflective tape.
524
00:29:47,252 --> 00:29:49,920
I'm gonna use it to mark off
our campsite before lights out.
525
00:29:49,921 --> 00:29:51,822
Make sure no wild animals
enter here.
526
00:29:51,823 --> 00:29:52,857
What, are you scared?
527
00:29:53,424 --> 00:29:56,094
It's not for our protection,
it's for theirs.
528
00:30:00,632 --> 00:30:01,566
Let's call it.
529
00:30:03,568 --> 00:30:04,736
We got a big hike tomorrow.
530
00:30:06,638 --> 00:30:07,939
Oh, okay.
531
00:30:10,008 --> 00:30:13,745
- Good night.
- Good night.
532
00:30:17,482 --> 00:30:20,885
So, we're still just...
keeping things cool?
533
00:30:21,419 --> 00:30:24,823
Yeah.
With simple, clear boundaries.
534
00:32:22,607 --> 00:32:23,907
Boo!
535
00:32:23,908 --> 00:32:26,711
Don't do that!
536
00:32:27,245 --> 00:32:29,180
I just thought a little
jump scare might wake you up.
537
00:32:29,614 --> 00:32:31,149
I know how much you love 'em.
538
00:32:31,816 --> 00:32:35,119
Who else is hung over?
The trick is to stay hydrated.
539
00:32:35,420 --> 00:32:37,754
- I like your pants, Ferg.
- Oh, thank you.
540
00:32:37,755 --> 00:32:39,756
these are my shark shorts,
an unholy sigil
541
00:32:39,757 --> 00:32:41,292
to give me shark powers
for our hike today.
542
00:32:41,993 --> 00:32:43,361
- Sick.
- All right.
543
00:32:43,594 --> 00:32:45,762
Who's ready to see
this fucking arch?
544
00:32:45,763 --> 00:32:47,765
Perfect! Everybody brought
hiking boots, I hope.
545
00:32:49,100 --> 00:32:51,269
You're not wearing
those fucking shorts, are you?
546
00:32:58,176 --> 00:33:00,610
Wilda
and the very happy campers
547
00:33:00,611 --> 00:33:03,314
crested the switchback
into view.
548
00:33:04,315 --> 00:33:06,751
Breathing heavily,
reeking terribly.
549
00:33:07,585 --> 00:33:10,153
Secreting from their pores,
the foul smelling remnants
550
00:33:10,154 --> 00:33:11,856
of last night's booze and drugs.
551
00:33:12,690 --> 00:33:15,760
An olfactory salute
to fearless living.
552
00:33:16,961 --> 00:33:18,963
The bottle of wine
in Wilda's backpack
553
00:33:19,464 --> 00:33:21,231
certainly wasn't growing
any less heavy
554
00:33:21,232 --> 00:33:25,135
as Cody's ceaseless death march
to Delicate Arch continued.
555
00:33:25,136 --> 00:33:27,070
Are you seriously
planning on doing the whole hike
556
00:33:27,071 --> 00:33:28,806
in that weird voice?
Because it's super annoying.
557
00:33:29,007 --> 00:33:31,308
Said Cody, all the while
silently contemplating
558
00:33:31,309 --> 00:33:32,710
his tiny little cock and balls.
559
00:33:32,977 --> 00:33:36,080
I have... to rest.
560
00:33:36,414 --> 00:33:38,648
We've already stopped,
like ten times.
561
00:33:38,649 --> 00:33:41,685
No, come on, let's take a break.
562
00:33:41,686 --> 00:33:44,788
Wilda had never sweat so much
in all her goddang life.
563
00:33:44,789 --> 00:33:46,823
And for the first time
since arriving in the desert
564
00:33:46,824 --> 00:33:48,493
her buzz was completely gone.
565
00:33:48,793 --> 00:33:51,528
- This made Wilda very sad.
- Aw, don't worry, cuz.
566
00:33:51,529 --> 00:33:53,030
I'll carry you
the rest of the way.
567
00:33:53,031 --> 00:33:54,998
Hey. Be careful! Be careful!
568
00:33:54,999 --> 00:33:56,401
Okay, put me down! Put me down.
569
00:33:57,235 --> 00:33:58,635
Hey, you know what?
I wanted to wait
570
00:33:58,636 --> 00:34:00,037
until we got to the arch
but I kinda think
571
00:34:00,038 --> 00:34:01,272
if we take these now,
572
00:34:01,672 --> 00:34:03,240
we might be able to time
our peak to hit
573
00:34:03,241 --> 00:34:04,541
right when we get
to the bowl up top.
574
00:34:04,542 --> 00:34:06,209
What, you brought mushrooms?
Yes!
575
00:34:06,210 --> 00:34:09,079
Of course, I brought mushrooms.
I'm the lovable stoner, right?
576
00:34:09,080 --> 00:34:10,180
Well, "lovable" wasn't
577
00:34:10,181 --> 00:34:12,282
necessarily part
of your character description.
578
00:34:12,283 --> 00:34:15,919
Do we seriously have to do this?
This is just gonna slow us down.
579
00:34:15,920 --> 00:34:17,687
You need to chill out,
dude, or else,
580
00:34:17,688 --> 00:34:18,890
we're all gonna fuckin' mutiny.
581
00:34:21,859 --> 00:34:24,094
Fine.
582
00:34:24,095 --> 00:34:25,196
If it shuts you up.
583
00:34:27,598 --> 00:34:29,032
Hey, have you ever
tried mushrooms?
584
00:34:29,033 --> 00:34:30,434
No, I... I don't like mushrooms.
585
00:34:30,435 --> 00:34:32,569
Yeah, well, they're not like,
on a fucking pizza, dude.
586
00:34:32,570 --> 00:34:34,237
You gotta start partying,
like, now.
587
00:34:34,238 --> 00:34:35,839
Or else you're gonna turn
into a fucking pumpkin
588
00:34:35,840 --> 00:34:36,874
like you did yesterday.
589
00:34:37,909 --> 00:34:38,843
Come on.
590
00:34:43,748 --> 00:34:44,715
Fine, fuck!
591
00:34:45,683 --> 00:34:47,251
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
That's way too many.
592
00:34:48,419 --> 00:34:50,054
- Dude!
- Oh, my god!
593
00:34:50,455 --> 00:34:52,889
They're like those Harry Potter
jelly beans that taste like
594
00:34:52,890 --> 00:34:54,257
- farts and boogers!
- Come on, Cody's right.
595
00:34:54,258 --> 00:34:55,459
We should try
to make to the arch
596
00:34:55,460 --> 00:34:57,694
before shit starts to get weird.
597
00:34:57,695 --> 00:35:00,865
Said Wilda, graciously
offering to lead the way.
598
00:35:03,468 --> 00:35:04,335
Okay.
599
00:35:22,753 --> 00:35:24,354
If you're doing
a story of my ass,
600
00:35:24,355 --> 00:35:26,456
- I'll fucking kill you.
- Gross, I would never.
601
00:35:26,457 --> 00:35:27,924
You know,
it's particularly fucked up,
602
00:35:27,925 --> 00:35:29,326
since you two are blood related.
603
00:35:29,327 --> 00:35:31,261
Nah, the incest taboo
is just a fucking
604
00:35:31,262 --> 00:35:32,829
bougie societal construct, dude.
605
00:35:32,830 --> 00:35:35,899
No. It exists to help strengthen
the genetic diversity
606
00:35:35,900 --> 00:35:37,468
- of the herd, man.
- Whatever.
607
00:35:37,668 --> 00:35:39,202
Hey, how you doin'
back there, Grant?
608
00:35:39,203 --> 00:35:40,737
Hey Ferg, be careful
walking backwards--
609
00:35:40,738 --> 00:35:42,205
- Nah, I'm good.
- No, be careful--
610
00:35:42,206 --> 00:35:44,475
- Nah, I said I'm good.
- There you go.
611
00:35:45,076 --> 00:35:46,077
Ow!
612
00:36:23,648 --> 00:36:25,850
Now you're pretending
to be confused on purpose.
613
00:36:26,517 --> 00:36:30,387
My point is, if aliens do exist,
why do we always assume that
614
00:36:30,388 --> 00:36:32,356
they would wanna try
and contact us humans?
615
00:36:32,990 --> 00:36:34,191
So, what are you saying, then?
616
00:36:34,192 --> 00:36:36,794
That they rather talk
to computers? Whales?
617
00:36:37,061 --> 00:36:38,428
Try fucking coral reefs, dude.
618
00:36:38,429 --> 00:36:40,063
If you look at the earth
from outer space,
619
00:36:40,064 --> 00:36:42,265
it's like, mostly fucking
water, dude.
620
00:36:42,266 --> 00:36:45,403
- You sound like Cody.
- Hey.
621
00:36:45,803 --> 00:36:47,837
And I mean, who's to say
that the extraterrestrials
622
00:36:47,838 --> 00:36:49,440
wouldn't be aquatic themselves,
like...
623
00:36:50,007 --> 00:36:52,577
like Edric the Guild Navigator.
Right, Grant?
624
00:36:53,411 --> 00:36:55,078
- Huh.
- So, wait.
625
00:36:55,079 --> 00:36:57,248
You think that that means coral?
626
00:36:57,882 --> 00:37:01,184
It depends if their brains
are just one big jelly muscle
627
00:37:01,185 --> 00:37:03,588
like ours or...
or if it's spread out
628
00:37:04,255 --> 00:37:06,357
across their whole nervous
system, dude.
629
00:37:06,691 --> 00:37:08,191
I think Grant's gonna puke.
630
00:37:32,283 --> 00:37:35,752
You know.
Ferg is right about one thing.
631
00:37:35,753 --> 00:37:38,255
That people's relationship
to their environment
632
00:37:38,256 --> 00:37:40,024
shapes what they value,
633
00:37:40,391 --> 00:37:42,627
how they interpret
the world around them.
634
00:37:43,060 --> 00:37:44,861
Guys, should we be
worried about Grant?
635
00:37:44,862 --> 00:37:47,030
He looks not, uh, great.
636
00:37:47,031 --> 00:37:49,266
I read this article about
a commencement speech
637
00:37:49,267 --> 00:37:51,101
a few years ago, right?
And it was about
638
00:37:51,102 --> 00:37:53,336
these two adolescent fish
and they're swimming
639
00:37:53,337 --> 00:37:55,905
through a river
minding their own business.
640
00:37:55,906 --> 00:37:58,142
And... and this, uh,
641
00:37:58,776 --> 00:38:00,343
This older fish,
he comes up to them,
642
00:38:00,344 --> 00:38:03,214
and he says,
"How's the water, boys?"
643
00:38:04,215 --> 00:38:05,416
And he swims away.
644
00:38:05,950 --> 00:38:09,819
And these two
adolescent fish, they turn,
645
00:38:09,820 --> 00:38:12,222
they turn to each other,
they look each other in the eyes
646
00:38:12,223 --> 00:38:13,124
and they say...
647
00:38:14,892 --> 00:38:16,127
"What the hell is water?"
648
00:38:19,597 --> 00:38:22,265
Grant stops to search
for our face,
649
00:38:22,266 --> 00:38:24,234
staring out into nothing,
650
00:38:24,235 --> 00:38:28,539
with two drooling,
drugged mouths.
651
00:38:30,107 --> 00:38:31,909
Did you hear that?
652
00:38:32,910 --> 00:38:35,012
It was a... it was a woman.
She said,
653
00:38:35,379 --> 00:38:38,249
"Once again,
Grant has his back turned,
654
00:38:38,516 --> 00:38:42,252
staring off into nothing with...
with two eyes
655
00:38:42,253 --> 00:38:44,288
made out of drooling,
drug mouths."
656
00:38:44,922 --> 00:38:47,124
That was it, word for word.
657
00:38:48,959 --> 00:38:49,993
It was Wilda.
658
00:38:49,994 --> 00:38:52,330
No, it wasn't.
It wasn't me.
659
00:38:58,569 --> 00:39:00,037
Yeah,
like immersive theater.
660
00:39:00,271 --> 00:39:02,306
There was this installation
in Spain.
661
00:39:02,807 --> 00:39:05,743
It was like, a pop-up
house party thing basically.
662
00:39:06,477 --> 00:39:09,346
- And at first, it seems like...
- Where... where are we?
663
00:39:09,347 --> 00:39:11,682
...a normal party, food, drinks.
664
00:39:12,350 --> 00:39:15,753
A DJ playing super fast EDM,
lots and lots of people.
665
00:39:16,187 --> 00:39:18,723
And you just kind of hang out
in that room for a while,
666
00:39:19,390 --> 00:39:22,559
and then, you get like,
kind of pushed into
667
00:39:22,560 --> 00:39:24,962
an even...
like a slightly smaller room,
668
00:39:25,196 --> 00:39:27,365
where there's less food,
not as much to drink,
669
00:39:27,665 --> 00:39:29,400
and the music is like, slower.
670
00:39:29,867 --> 00:39:31,569
- More sparse and minimalistic...
- This...
671
00:39:31,936 --> 00:39:33,136
...and you're in the
second room...
672
00:39:33,137 --> 00:39:33,938
...this isn't Arches!
673
00:39:34,205 --> 00:39:36,574
and then like, without
even fricking noticing,
674
00:39:37,308 --> 00:39:39,543
you're like,
in an even smaller room.
675
00:39:39,777 --> 00:39:41,379
- And then--
- Dude, shit!
676
00:39:41,779 --> 00:39:43,047
Are those buzzards?
677
00:39:53,724 --> 00:39:57,094
Until suddenly, you were
in a closet, all by yourself,
678
00:39:57,461 --> 00:40:00,063
holding a hand mirror
with a note written in Sharpie
679
00:40:00,064 --> 00:40:05,034
across the glass,
"Koko Kara Deru."
680
00:40:06,470 --> 00:40:08,372
- What's that mean?
- I think it means,
681
00:40:08,572 --> 00:40:10,573
"Leave through here"
in Japanese.
682
00:40:10,574 --> 00:40:12,042
Or "Get out of here."
683
00:40:16,580 --> 00:40:18,081
Before we get back
to civilization,
684
00:40:18,082 --> 00:40:20,350
I'm gonna need you to delete
anything that could end up
685
00:40:20,351 --> 00:40:21,951
on some creepy jack-off Reddit.
686
00:40:21,952 --> 00:40:23,921
Chill out, I'm just playing
around with some new filters.
687
00:40:24,388 --> 00:40:25,723
- Yo, can I see them?
- Yeah.
688
00:40:28,259 --> 00:40:30,294
Did you guys ever see
the movie Midnight Special?
689
00:40:30,561 --> 00:40:32,729
There's this idea in it,
of another world
690
00:40:32,730 --> 00:40:35,298
- built on top of our world.
- Jesus Christ.
691
00:40:35,299 --> 00:40:39,202
My man takes drugs one time
and immediately becomes Ferg.
692
00:40:39,203 --> 00:40:41,372
Like, it's just sitting there
693
00:40:41,839 --> 00:40:43,240
on top of our reality.
694
00:40:44,108 --> 00:40:47,143
Another world that our reality
wears over itself.
695
00:40:47,144 --> 00:40:51,649
Like a... like an invisible
ski parka or something.
696
00:40:52,616 --> 00:40:55,051
- Do... does that make sense?
- Come on, guys.
697
00:40:55,052 --> 00:40:56,786
Can we just get to this
goddamn rock already?
698
00:40:56,787 --> 00:40:58,788
These mushrooms have added
like an hour to this thing.
699
00:40:58,789 --> 00:41:00,791
We are, chill out.
700
00:41:01,826 --> 00:41:04,494
- Dude.
- Spelunking.
701
00:41:04,495 --> 00:41:06,797
Don't call me "dude."
702
00:41:06,997 --> 00:41:08,965
And watch your step
right here, this...
703
00:41:08,966 --> 00:41:12,635
- "Watch your step right here!"
- "Watch your step right here!"
704
00:41:12,636 --> 00:41:13,870
Don't mimic me, please.
705
00:41:13,871 --> 00:41:15,271
- "Don't mimic me!"
- I'm not mimicking you,
706
00:41:15,272 --> 00:41:16,307
I'm just repeating it.
707
00:41:29,286 --> 00:41:30,187
I got it.
708
00:41:38,362 --> 00:41:39,797
It's so beautiful out here.
709
00:41:44,335 --> 00:41:50,274
We are at the halfway point
of Delicate Arch.
710
00:41:50,808 --> 00:41:52,877
Yeah, no shit, dude and we still
gotta climb back down.
711
00:41:53,544 --> 00:41:56,347
No. Delicate Arch, the movie.
712
00:42:02,186 --> 00:42:04,854
You know, this area
is considered sacred
713
00:42:04,855 --> 00:42:07,858
by this region's, uh,
indigenous people.
714
00:42:08,559 --> 00:42:13,564
The Pueblos, the Hopis,
the, eh, Utes. The Utes.
715
00:42:14,231 --> 00:42:16,667
They thought that
these arches were portals
716
00:42:17,067 --> 00:42:18,602
to another time and space.
717
00:42:19,136 --> 00:42:20,504
If you walk behind the portals,
718
00:42:21,038 --> 00:42:24,041
you essentially enter
a dream world.
719
00:43:10,921 --> 00:43:12,121
It is the convergence
720
00:43:12,122 --> 00:43:14,524
in time and location
of two great migrations.
721
00:44:08,812 --> 00:44:10,247
Jump scare!
722
00:44:10,848 --> 00:44:11,982
I hate that!
723
00:44:12,583 --> 00:44:14,617
Jump scares are so cheap
and stupid.
724
00:44:14,618 --> 00:44:16,320
Only 'cause I made you
shit your pants.
725
00:44:16,854 --> 00:44:18,521
A sudden burst
of noise or motion
726
00:44:18,522 --> 00:44:20,891
promoting an involuntary
physiological response
727
00:44:21,125 --> 00:44:22,258
isn't fear.
728
00:44:22,259 --> 00:44:24,428
It's just superficial
animal instinct.
729
00:44:25,129 --> 00:44:27,130
You keep talking like a nerd,
I'm gonna beat you up
730
00:44:27,131 --> 00:44:29,066
and take your fucking lunch
money like a nerd, too.
731
00:44:29,667 --> 00:44:30,834
Ouch!
732
00:44:35,439 --> 00:44:37,540
Hey, go grab the others.
733
00:44:37,541 --> 00:44:39,543
I think I have an idea
for a movie.
734
00:46:33,924 --> 00:46:37,460
Okay, and the hand
reaches uselessly.
735
00:46:37,461 --> 00:46:41,131
It can't get the cigarettes.
Continues to reach uselessly.
736
00:46:41,331 --> 00:46:43,600
Continues to reach, and...
737
00:46:44,301 --> 00:46:45,335
Cut!
738
00:46:46,937 --> 00:46:49,506
Oh, my god.
739
00:46:50,440 --> 00:46:52,409
- Hey, that was fun.
- Yeah, that was good.
740
00:46:53,110 --> 00:46:56,112
I don't think
I get it though, still.
741
00:46:56,113 --> 00:46:58,515
What is it like, uh,
an addiction metaphor?
742
00:46:58,749 --> 00:47:01,350
Maybe, I don't know,
it's mostly just the best idea
743
00:47:01,351 --> 00:47:03,286
I could think to do
with what we have to work with.
744
00:47:03,287 --> 00:47:04,587
Well, it's not like you care,
745
00:47:04,588 --> 00:47:06,356
but I thought the whole thing
was pretty "meh."
746
00:47:06,590 --> 00:47:08,424
We could have chosen
a more dynamic location,
747
00:47:08,425 --> 00:47:09,959
like the hot springs.
748
00:47:09,960 --> 00:47:12,129
No, I didn't write anything
like that into this idea.
749
00:47:12,329 --> 00:47:13,230
What do you mean?
750
00:47:13,430 --> 00:47:14,865
You just came up
with this "idea" like
751
00:47:15,065 --> 00:47:16,633
- five seconds ago.
- No!
752
00:47:16,900 --> 00:47:19,702
If it's not motivated,
and it's not in the frame,
753
00:47:19,703 --> 00:47:20,871
then it doesn't exist.
754
00:47:25,309 --> 00:47:28,211
But I guess we could still do
Ferg's zombie thing instead.
755
00:47:28,212 --> 00:47:29,712
- Yes!
- Uh, no.
756
00:47:29,713 --> 00:47:30,880
we're not cutting up
our foreheads
757
00:47:30,881 --> 00:47:32,048
just for your video.
758
00:47:32,049 --> 00:47:33,683
Why not?
Wrestlers do it all the time.
759
00:47:33,684 --> 00:47:36,252
Yeah, I'm down! I'm down!
760
00:47:36,253 --> 00:47:37,254
- No!
- No!
761
00:48:04,348 --> 00:48:05,849
Hey, we need to talk.
762
00:48:06,817 --> 00:48:09,920
Oh. Yeah, sure.
763
00:48:13,523 --> 00:48:14,491
Where's Grant?
764
00:48:14,758 --> 00:48:15,726
I don't know.
765
00:48:39,082 --> 00:48:40,083
Fuck.
766
00:48:57,301 --> 00:48:58,302
Grant?
767
00:49:00,070 --> 00:49:01,104
Yeah?
768
00:49:01,738 --> 00:49:03,106
Uh, we need a favor.
769
00:49:04,007 --> 00:49:05,075
Wh... what is it?
770
00:49:05,475 --> 00:49:08,010
We were just wondering
if we could use your car
771
00:49:08,011 --> 00:49:10,147
to go into town for just,
like, an hour?
772
00:49:11,114 --> 00:49:12,449
What, why?
773
00:49:12,783 --> 00:49:15,451
Turns out this guy from my fluid
mech intensive is down here too.
774
00:49:15,452 --> 00:49:16,819
And he just texted me
and told me that
775
00:49:16,820 --> 00:49:19,088
he's got a bunch of extra Molly,
which he can hook us up with
776
00:49:19,089 --> 00:49:20,724
- if we want any.
- Which we do.
777
00:49:21,325 --> 00:49:22,826
I don't know,
I was kind of hoping
778
00:49:23,160 --> 00:49:24,794
maybe we would
just chill out tonight.
779
00:49:24,795 --> 00:49:27,431
Me too, that's exactly
what Molly is, Beverly.
780
00:49:27,898 --> 00:49:28,899
Chilling out.
781
00:49:30,133 --> 00:49:34,604
Okay fine,
let's all go. I'll drive.
782
00:49:35,973 --> 00:49:36,840
Afraid not.
783
00:49:37,107 --> 00:49:38,909
Fluid Mech is only gonna deal
with somebody he knows.
784
00:49:39,977 --> 00:49:40,911
Alone.
785
00:49:41,278 --> 00:49:44,581
Why--
Then why is Wilda going?
786
00:49:45,182 --> 00:49:46,183
Because...
787
00:49:47,951 --> 00:49:48,819
P.G.D.
788
00:49:49,386 --> 00:49:51,989
P.G.D? Wha... what's that?
789
00:49:52,189 --> 00:49:53,389
"Pretty Girl Discount."
790
00:49:53,390 --> 00:49:56,225
Cody thinks Fluid Mech will
give us like 20 percent off
791
00:49:56,226 --> 00:49:57,293
- if we use...
- Yeah.
792
00:49:57,294 --> 00:49:59,028
...my toothsome cutie pie smile
793
00:49:59,029 --> 00:50:01,163
to vex and beguile
his base male instincts.
794
00:50:01,164 --> 00:50:02,232
Ew! No.
795
00:50:02,432 --> 00:50:06,470
- Tha... that's so gross. No way.
- Please? Pretty, pretty, please?
796
00:50:11,308 --> 00:50:12,808
Okay, fine. Whatever.
797
00:50:12,809 --> 00:50:14,810
Just text me so I know
everything goes okay.
798
00:50:14,811 --> 00:50:15,779
You got it, man.
799
00:50:17,014 --> 00:50:17,881
Thanks
800
00:50:19,549 --> 00:50:21,251
- I'm gonna go get my wallet.
- Thanks.
801
00:50:22,419 --> 00:50:23,820
Wilda, can I ask you something.
802
00:50:24,721 --> 00:50:25,789
Promise you won't get mad?
803
00:50:27,057 --> 00:50:29,092
Okay.
Yeah, what is it?
804
00:50:29,893 --> 00:50:30,827
Well, like.
805
00:50:31,261 --> 00:50:33,096
What's going on
between you two?
806
00:50:35,065 --> 00:50:36,066
You two who?
807
00:50:36,433 --> 00:50:38,235
You and Cody. Like...
808
00:50:38,702 --> 00:50:40,903
It's okay if you're hooking up.
All right, I'm not jealous,
809
00:50:40,904 --> 00:50:42,438
it just, it sucks that
you'd hide something
810
00:50:42,439 --> 00:50:44,074
- like that from me.
- Oh, my god.
811
00:50:44,408 --> 00:50:46,543
Grant, can you give me
more credit than that?
812
00:50:46,843 --> 00:50:49,279
I don't care, I'm not like
obsessed or anything.
813
00:50:49,513 --> 00:50:50,813
It's just kind of immature,
814
00:50:50,814 --> 00:50:51,715
- is all.
- Grant.
815
00:50:52,249 --> 00:50:53,749
Please don't start
some weird drama.
816
00:50:53,750 --> 00:50:55,885
I'm not!
You're the one sneaking around,
817
00:50:55,886 --> 00:50:56,753
going off on your secret little
818
00:50:57,087 --> 00:50:58,687
- Molly missions together.
- Grant, we talked about this.
819
00:50:58,688 --> 00:51:00,924
For hours and hours, we talked.
820
00:51:01,224 --> 00:51:02,926
We laid all the ground rules.
821
00:51:03,693 --> 00:51:05,228
And I feel like
you're doing it again.
822
00:51:05,429 --> 00:51:07,831
This fake shit,
trying to act all cool.
823
00:51:08,031 --> 00:51:10,533
I mean, come on, just friends
is what we talked about,
824
00:51:10,534 --> 00:51:11,600
- and you promised me.
- We are friends!
825
00:51:11,601 --> 00:51:13,369
- You promised me.
- I know what I promised.
826
00:51:13,370 --> 00:51:15,104
- I know that I did.
- You were the one who wanted to
827
00:51:15,105 --> 00:51:17,607
- break up with me, remember?
- Whoa, what the fuck?
828
00:51:18,408 --> 00:51:20,309
- Wilda, we both decided.
- No!
829
00:51:20,310 --> 00:51:22,011
No, I'm not gonna argue
with a crazy person.
830
00:51:22,012 --> 00:51:23,613
Okay, stop! Okay, look.
831
00:51:24,047 --> 00:51:26,015
Look, I'm the one that finally
brought it up,
832
00:51:26,016 --> 00:51:29,218
but you were totally checked out
of the relationship for months.
833
00:51:29,219 --> 00:51:30,152
That's not what
I'm talking about.
834
00:51:30,153 --> 00:51:31,721
I'm talking about
the creeping around.
835
00:51:32,622 --> 00:51:33,790
The following me.
836
00:51:34,091 --> 00:51:35,459
- The watching?
- I'm sorry,
837
00:51:35,759 --> 00:51:37,327
I just wanna know
what's up with you.
838
00:51:38,562 --> 00:51:39,562
That you're okay.
839
00:51:39,563 --> 00:51:41,631
You're my fucking friend,
you know?
840
00:51:42,966 --> 00:51:43,967
Cody too.
841
00:51:54,711 --> 00:51:56,913
Whatever.
842
00:51:58,048 --> 00:51:59,049
Enjoy the truck.
843
00:52:01,351 --> 00:52:02,285
Fuck you.
844
00:52:15,832 --> 00:52:16,967
You okay, dude?
845
00:52:23,640 --> 00:52:24,541
I'm fine.
846
00:52:28,078 --> 00:52:29,446
Ah, shit, man.
847
00:52:29,679 --> 00:52:30,747
I mean, this is roughing it.
848
00:52:31,014 --> 00:52:33,116
You know, this dusty boy's
our last brew dog.
849
00:52:33,783 --> 00:52:35,785
Hey, when are Cody and Wilda
coming back with the re-up?
850
00:52:37,020 --> 00:52:37,921
I don't know.
851
00:52:39,990 --> 00:52:41,791
About ho...- how long ago
did they leave?
852
00:52:42,192 --> 00:52:43,093
Uh...
853
00:52:47,564 --> 00:52:48,665
Fuck.
854
00:52:49,332 --> 00:52:51,635
My battery's dead. You got
a remote charger or something?
855
00:52:51,935 --> 00:52:56,039
Yeah, in... the truck.
My phone, too.
856
00:52:56,640 --> 00:52:57,574
Oh, so what?
857
00:52:58,041 --> 00:53:00,309
We're phoneless?
Fucking phoneless bitches, dude?
858
00:53:00,310 --> 00:53:03,647
Why aren't they back yet?
Like, should we be worried?
859
00:53:06,383 --> 00:53:08,018
Oh, you think
it was the zombies?
860
00:53:08,552 --> 00:53:09,486
Shut up.
861
00:53:10,253 --> 00:53:14,523
Or, hey, maybe it was
the aliens, or fuck,
862
00:53:14,524 --> 00:53:16,225
- the apocalypse bikers, dude?
- Knock it off!
863
00:53:16,226 --> 00:53:17,960
Hey, like you said,
we're near skinwalker, right?
864
00:53:17,961 --> 00:53:19,396
Stop! Just be quiet.
865
00:53:20,497 --> 00:53:21,531
Or maybe...
866
00:53:22,265 --> 00:53:24,234
What if we unlocked
something at the arch?
867
00:53:25,902 --> 00:53:27,269
You know,
Cody said it was a portal.
868
00:53:27,270 --> 00:53:29,005
Shut up! Just shut the fuck up.
869
00:53:32,709 --> 00:53:33,877
I'm sorry, I just...
870
00:53:36,880 --> 00:53:37,913
I wanna know
what's up with them.
871
00:53:37,914 --> 00:53:39,683
Like, what's taking them
so goddamn long?
872
00:53:40,617 --> 00:53:42,352
We should try
and calm down, okay?
873
00:53:44,688 --> 00:53:45,922
Got any ghost stories?
874
00:53:51,628 --> 00:53:52,562
No.
875
00:53:54,030 --> 00:53:55,365
I'm not really in the mood.
876
00:54:21,791 --> 00:54:22,659
Hello?
877
00:54:34,437 --> 00:54:35,405
Ferg?
878
00:54:54,758 --> 00:54:55,659
Ferg!
879
00:55:02,499 --> 00:55:03,366
Ferg!
880
00:55:08,705 --> 00:55:10,273
Ferg, wait!
881
00:55:13,476 --> 00:55:15,545
Ferg!
882
00:55:40,203 --> 00:55:41,137
Wait!
883
00:56:03,760 --> 00:56:06,429
Ferg. Ferg!
884
00:57:34,284 --> 00:57:36,152
Cody?
885
00:57:36,786 --> 00:57:37,787
Wilda?
886
00:57:39,856 --> 00:57:41,290
Where were you?
887
00:57:41,291 --> 00:57:44,293
What the hell are you doing?
I'm-- I'm here. Stop shaking me!
888
00:57:44,294 --> 00:57:45,295
I'm here.
889
00:57:46,996 --> 00:57:48,298
What were you doing in my tent?
890
00:57:50,533 --> 00:57:51,700
Were you trying
to take my camera?
891
00:57:51,701 --> 00:57:53,670
No, you weren't here.
You were not here.
892
00:57:54,003 --> 00:57:56,472
I think, uh...
893
00:57:56,473 --> 00:57:57,707
...I passed out.
There was, like...
894
00:57:59,275 --> 00:58:00,477
a fucking city out there.
895
00:58:01,077 --> 00:58:02,144
What did you slip me last night?
896
00:58:02,145 --> 00:58:03,412
I told you. Nothing--
897
00:58:03,413 --> 00:58:04,681
Now, I need to know.
898
00:58:05,148 --> 00:58:06,649
Why weren't you
in your tent last night?
899
00:58:08,618 --> 00:58:12,322
Because I was looking for you!
You fucking moron drug addict!
900
00:58:13,022 --> 00:58:14,690
Your brains are so fucked,
901
00:58:14,691 --> 00:58:17,160
you were sleepwalking around
like a fucking asshole!
902
00:58:22,532 --> 00:58:24,667
- There's no more water?
- Yeah, we're out of everything.
903
00:58:25,034 --> 00:58:26,201
Cody and Wilda are still gone?
904
00:58:26,202 --> 00:58:27,437
Yeah, and they have
all our keys,
905
00:58:27,704 --> 00:58:29,138
and our phones,
and all our shit too!
906
00:58:29,739 --> 00:58:31,841
Okay.
907
00:58:33,209 --> 00:58:35,445
And we need to calm down, okay?
908
00:58:35,678 --> 00:58:37,813
I'm sure they'll be back soon,
they have to be.
909
00:58:44,754 --> 00:58:46,356
You said I was sleepwalking?
910
00:58:49,726 --> 00:58:50,727
Yeah
911
00:58:58,401 --> 00:58:59,701
- What the hell are you doing?
- I'm gonna look
912
00:58:59,702 --> 00:59:01,036
- for Cody and Wilda.
- Ferg!
913
00:59:01,037 --> 00:59:03,305
No! There's no more water.
914
00:59:03,306 --> 00:59:05,842
It's too far, and it's supposed
to get really, really hot today.
915
00:59:06,342 --> 00:59:07,743
You were right about
this being a fucking
916
00:59:07,744 --> 00:59:10,579
- horror movie, dude.
- Don't be stupid!
917
00:59:10,580 --> 00:59:11,880
I was just
fucking around with you!
918
00:59:11,881 --> 00:59:13,516
No, you weren't
just fucking around!
919
00:59:15,385 --> 00:59:16,419
You weren't.
920
00:59:17,220 --> 00:59:19,855
I knew you felt it,
but now I feel it too, dude.
921
00:59:19,856 --> 00:59:21,323
And Cody and Wilda?
I mean, what?
922
00:59:21,324 --> 00:59:22,859
They're just, like,
sitting ducks out there?
923
00:59:23,259 --> 00:59:25,495
- Are you fucking for real?
- Exactly!
924
00:59:25,762 --> 00:59:28,565
Am I fucking for real?
925
00:59:30,366 --> 00:59:31,601
I don't know.
926
00:59:34,070 --> 00:59:37,039
Or, you know...
... maybe...
927
00:59:37,040 --> 00:59:39,041
Hey, maybe
my existence started
928
00:59:39,042 --> 00:59:41,644
when you guys pulled up in a car
right out front of my house.
929
00:59:43,279 --> 00:59:45,747
Or...
930
00:59:45,748 --> 00:59:47,449
Or whoever's house that was,
931
00:59:47,450 --> 00:59:49,885
you know, that-- that-- that--
that the film crew rented
932
00:59:49,886 --> 00:59:51,887
to use as a location
for the movie that we're in--
933
00:59:51,888 --> 00:59:53,288
Okay, you are on
too many fucking drugs.
934
00:59:53,289 --> 00:59:54,356
- No, I'm not.
- Cut it out
935
00:59:54,357 --> 00:59:56,192
with the metaphysical bullshit, okay?
936
00:59:57,126 --> 00:59:57,994
Look.
937
00:59:59,529 --> 01:00:01,464
Don't go. Okay?
938
01:00:03,066 --> 01:00:04,299
What am I gonna do here
by myself?
939
01:00:04,300 --> 01:00:05,667
I don't know! I don't know.
940
01:00:05,668 --> 01:00:07,903
I just know that I need
to leave, like, right now.
941
01:00:07,904 --> 01:00:09,638
Ferg, please.
942
01:00:09,639 --> 01:00:11,206
I have a really bad feeling
about this.
943
01:00:11,207 --> 01:00:12,375
No, get outta my way!
944
01:00:12,842 --> 01:00:14,843
So, we're in a horror movie?
945
01:00:14,844 --> 01:00:16,945
So what?
What do you think happens
946
01:00:16,946 --> 01:00:18,380
to the main characters
947
01:00:18,381 --> 01:00:20,849
when they all start going off
one by one?
948
01:00:20,850 --> 01:00:23,652
- We need to stick together.
- Fuck you, dude!
949
01:00:23,653 --> 01:00:26,656
And let me out.
Look, I just need to leave.
950
01:00:28,391 --> 01:00:30,426
Okay.
951
01:00:32,161 --> 01:00:33,396
Well, I have to stay.
952
01:00:33,930 --> 01:00:36,698
Why?
Why?
953
01:00:36,699 --> 01:00:38,234
Come with me, please!
954
01:00:39,168 --> 01:00:40,236
I can't.
955
01:00:41,871 --> 01:00:44,439
Fuck!
Okay!
956
01:00:44,440 --> 01:00:46,108
Then I'll just
see you later, huh?
957
01:00:46,109 --> 01:00:47,443
I'll just see you later.
958
01:00:50,446 --> 01:00:52,281
You're making a huge mistake!
959
01:05:32,862 --> 01:05:34,897
Who?
960
01:05:53,616 --> 01:05:58,020
Fuck you!
Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you!
961
01:06:09,332 --> 01:06:12,134
Cody! Wilda!
962
01:06:17,807 --> 01:06:18,908
What the fuck!
963
01:06:59,982 --> 01:07:01,483
What's zee problem?
964
01:07:01,484 --> 01:07:04,520
Did zee fart mobile
run out of zee farts, blegh!
965
01:07:05,788 --> 01:07:07,189
It just needs a second.
966
01:07:07,656 --> 01:07:10,992
Fucking Grant's car sucks
as bad as his shitty movies
967
01:07:10,993 --> 01:07:13,329
Uh-oh! Vadda you think,
Creap Heap?
968
01:07:13,662 --> 01:07:17,533
Zee car is dead.
Shall we bail und flail?
969
01:07:18,000 --> 01:07:20,035
Or shall we stay and filet?
970
01:07:20,036 --> 01:07:23,406
Leave your creepy comment
below, ah ah ah!
971
01:07:24,006 --> 01:07:25,107
You know,
I don't really get it
972
01:07:25,541 --> 01:07:26,708
Are you supposed to be,
like, the Count
973
01:07:26,709 --> 01:07:27,977
from Sesame Street or something?
974
01:07:28,644 --> 01:07:30,980
Mm, more like Elvira or Vampira.
975
01:07:31,447 --> 01:07:35,050
Or like a sexy, um,
cryptkeeper, I guess?
976
01:07:38,387 --> 01:07:40,221
Well, are you
German and Hungarian?
977
01:07:40,222 --> 01:07:42,358
Because your accent
just keeps going back and forth.
978
01:07:42,558 --> 01:07:45,560
Look, the Creap Heap
is a work in progress, okay?
979
01:07:45,561 --> 01:07:47,462
Okay.
980
01:07:47,463 --> 01:07:48,997
Fucking Grant!
981
01:07:48,998 --> 01:07:52,267
Of course, you've got six tons
of stage makeup in your car
982
01:07:52,268 --> 01:07:55,738
and zero roadside repair kits.
Get outta my face.
983
01:07:56,872 --> 01:07:59,208
Just think how bored we would be
if he did not.
984
01:08:01,944 --> 01:08:03,545
Ugh!
How long have we been
985
01:08:03,546 --> 01:08:05,880
- stuck out here?
- Fifteen minutes?
986
01:08:05,881 --> 01:08:07,015
An hour? Two hours?
987
01:08:07,016 --> 01:08:08,716
Like, I literally
don't know anymore.
988
01:08:10,686 --> 01:08:12,321
Holy shit,
are these guys for real?
989
01:08:13,556 --> 01:08:14,490
What?
990
01:08:15,024 --> 01:08:16,858
Are these guys, right here,
are they fucking for real?
991
01:08:16,859 --> 01:08:18,393
What is happen--
992
01:08:18,394 --> 01:08:19,894
- Oh, my God!
- Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuck!
993
01:08:19,895 --> 01:08:21,930
They're for real.
994
01:08:21,931 --> 01:08:23,966
Shit. Shit! Fuck!
995
01:08:44,086 --> 01:08:47,490
Did zee fart mobile
run out of zee farts? Blegh!
996
01:08:48,657 --> 01:08:49,992
It just needs a second.
997
01:08:50,626 --> 01:08:53,094
Fucking Grant's car sucks
as bad as his shitty movies.
998
01:08:54,530 --> 01:08:55,831
How long have we been
stuck in here?
999
01:08:56,465 --> 01:08:58,734
I don't know,
15 minutes?
1000
01:08:58,968 --> 01:09:01,303
An hour? Two hours?
I literally don't know.
1001
01:09:05,641 --> 01:09:07,176
What the f--
Who the hell are they?
1002
01:09:09,211 --> 01:09:10,378
- Ah, ah ah!
- No, no, I'm serious.
1003
01:09:10,379 --> 01:09:12,780
Who, who the hell are they?
Shit! Shit!
1004
01:09:12,781 --> 01:09:15,116
Oh, my God!
1005
01:09:16,152 --> 01:09:17,685
Fuck!
1006
01:09:17,686 --> 01:09:19,454
Shit!
1007
01:09:47,950 --> 01:09:50,152
Ferg steps into their fate...
1008
01:09:51,353 --> 01:09:55,558
and in seeing their face,
now sees ours...
1009
01:10:08,370 --> 01:10:10,839
Together they burn.
1010
01:11:29,351 --> 01:11:31,420
I can't get the camera!
1011
01:11:57,079 --> 01:12:00,181
No! Oh, ah!
1012
01:12:00,182 --> 01:12:01,984
Fuck!
1013
01:12:03,252 --> 01:12:09,491
Fuck!
1014
01:12:50,499 --> 01:12:51,500
Ferg!
1015
01:12:53,068 --> 01:12:54,203
Jesus
Christ!
1016
01:13:00,709 --> 01:13:02,344
I got you.
1017
01:13:07,416 --> 01:13:08,984
Ferg...
1018
01:13:10,586 --> 01:13:13,622
I'm sorry, Ferg.
1019
01:13:18,327 --> 01:13:20,362
No, don't look at them!
1020
01:13:31,373 --> 01:13:32,441
What
are you doing?
1021
01:13:36,612 --> 01:13:39,181
No! Fuck, dude!
1022
01:13:39,882 --> 01:13:40,883
Don't!
1023
01:14:08,143 --> 01:14:09,945
Cody?! Wilda?!
1024
01:15:28,457 --> 01:15:30,826
Oh, my God, Kevin!
1025
01:15:32,394 --> 01:15:33,929
Why
would you do this?
1026
01:15:36,398 --> 01:15:38,667
And why would you do this
1027
01:15:39,301 --> 01:15:41,703
to me?
1028
01:16:40,128 --> 01:16:41,196
Wilda!
1029
01:16:43,632 --> 01:16:45,000
Wilda!
1030
01:17:42,958 --> 01:17:45,292
What the fuck!
1031
01:17:45,293 --> 01:17:46,427
What is happening?
1032
01:17:46,428 --> 01:17:48,162
- No!
- Someone call 9-1-1!
1033
01:18:10,519 --> 01:18:11,520
So, how is he?
1034
01:18:12,888 --> 01:18:14,189
I couldn't bring myself
to go in,
1035
01:18:14,723 --> 01:18:16,458
but Wilda's in there right now.
1036
01:18:17,926 --> 01:18:20,228
So, Ojai, Krotona?
1037
01:18:20,562 --> 01:18:21,463
Are you nervous?
1038
01:18:23,532 --> 01:18:25,233
Uh, just trying to stay present.
1039
01:18:25,934 --> 01:18:27,569
Wait, ther--
One more thing. Ther--
1040
01:18:27,936 --> 01:18:30,838
Delta Flight 6504 to Los Angeles
1041
01:18:30,839 --> 01:18:32,541
now boarding Group C.
1042
01:18:33,308 --> 01:18:34,309
Uh, that's me.
1043
01:18:34,876 --> 01:18:37,244
Okay dude, um,
give Wilda my love,
1044
01:18:37,245 --> 01:18:39,181
and, and yeah, I gotta go.
1045
01:18:48,023 --> 01:18:50,358
Hey! Uh, how is he?
1046
01:18:56,064 --> 01:18:58,400
This is where
he needs to be, yeah?
1047
01:18:59,401 --> 01:19:01,503
- They can help him here.
- It's over.
1048
01:19:04,573 --> 01:19:06,508
Yeah, no, I, I understand.
1049
01:19:07,442 --> 01:19:09,444
Um... it's been a lot.
1050
01:19:10,779 --> 01:19:12,881
No, that's not what I mean.
1051
01:19:57,559 --> 01:19:59,928
Is... is anyone still there?
1052
01:20:05,133 --> 01:20:06,168
Hello?
72773
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