Original subtitles

[ Up-tempo instrumental music plays ]

Chris: Studio "A, " this is master control.

You're up on router 7. Have a good show.

Dana: Will, show me Denver. Natalie: And I need 15 points of sound on Kansas City.

Will: Denver's up. -- Yes, it is. Give me Gr een Bay.

Stand by, Audio. Stand by, VTR.

-- Georgia Dome's hot. -- You'r e hot, Atlanta.

Somebody, Arrowhead, then back to Mile High -- is that how it goes?

We'r e live her e in 60 seconds.

Somebody? Anybody?

What do you need?

-- Does Arrowhead -- -- Arrowhead bounces to Mile High.

Thank you.

Why'd you change that?

Just to mess with your head. Get me Judy at Oakland-Alameda.

When you get right down to it, what I'm saying is this, Case --

I think you should start getting out of your house.

-- Dan, we'r e going to Arrowhead first, then Denver. -- Got it.

Just out of your house.

I am out of my house.

I've been out of my house f or six months.

I don't live at my house.

Man: 30 seconds to tape.

We'r e coming to the studio in 90 seconds.

Good evening.

-- Isaac Jaff ee's in the house, Natalie. -- Yo.

We can make a f eed on 43.

Just make sur e the guys have the change. [ Snaps fingers ]

[ Shouting ] Casey, did you get the change on Arrowhead and Denver?!

Natalie, if you shout into a microphone

when I'm wearing an earpiece, it poses the question

"Is ther e a decibel level at which the human head will just,

you know, explode?"

Is he in a better mood than he was this morning,

or is this gonna be another crappy show?

Hey, Casey, Isaac wants to know if you'r e in a better mood --

Shut up.

Pr etty crappy, yeah.

-- Roll tape. -- Good show, everybody.

Tonight on "Sports Night, " we'll show you what comes up...

Dan, Casey, we'r e on you in 60 seconds.

Uh, ex cuse me.

Dan's got his hand raised.

Why ar e we quoting high-level sources

inside the Swiss Olympic Committee

on Helsinki's bid f or the 2010 Olympics?

-- What's the problem? -- Helsinki's in Finland.

Really?

Yeah. Don't worry. I got it.

Ar e you sur e?

Am I sur e that Helsinki's in Finland?

Yeah. I'm quite sur e.

I thought it was in Sweden.

It says "unnamed Swiss Olympic officials."

Graphics! Which is it, Sweden or Switzerland?

It's in Finland.

-- Elliott, get something up on the Net! -- What do you need?

We think Helsinki might be in Finland.

Yeah, we think ther e's a pr etty good chance.

Man: Coming in live in 15.

We'll change it on the teleprompter.

Cool. We can go out after the show.

You can stay at my place. Whatever you need. Whatever you need.

I'm getting a divorce. I don't need a cruise dir ector.

Right.

My f oul.

Forget I said anything.

In 5...4...

3...2... 1.

Good evening, everybody.

From New York City, I'm Dan Rydell alongside Casey McCall.

Those stories and mor e, plus we'll take you live to the locker room at Arrowhead.

All that coming up after this.

You'r e watching "Sports Night" on CSC, so stick around.

We're out. Up in 60.

Yeah. Finland.

The national bird is the whooping swan.

-- Thank you. -- Thank you.

Dan: Columbia, 34, Colgate, 3. Who owes me money?

Thank you.

Oh!

Hey, Jason Grisham got arr ested

in a strip bar in Houston last night.

[ Chuckles ] That was only a matter of time.

Kim and Elliott ar e on it.

Kim, Elliott. Jason Grisham -- what's up?

He shot 12-f or-15 f rom the field,

and then he went to the Silver Key.

-- It's a nude nightclub. -- Topless only.

A guy called him something he didn't like, and Grisham hit him with a bottle of cognac.

-- It was brandy. -- It was cognac.

It was Courvoisier.

Courvoisier is cognac.

You get me the lawyer, you get me the agent, then get us Jason Grisham on the phone.

-- We can't get Grisham on the phone. -- Yes, you can.

-- We ar e trying. -- Try harder.

32 points. It was a car eer high.

Then he sends a guy to the hospital with 14 stitches.

-- Can you imagine if he'd had a lousy game? -- [ Chuckles ]

You come in early?

I came in early.

You slept in the office?

-- I came in early. -- You came in yesterday.

Mom...

Have I told you about my New York r enaissance?

Yeah. A lot. You've told me about your New York r enaissance a lot.

Last night's show. What's up?

Grisham's f r ee on bail, Casey slept in his office,

and I'm having a New York r enaissance.

[ Chuckles ] Cool. Rundown meeting's in five minutes.

I think the show's going to hell in a handbasket,

and I'm r eady to fir e the whole bunch of you.

Yes, but you won't 'cause we'r e all f amily her e,

and I'm just like a daughter to you.

No, this is a television show her e,

and you'r e very much like an employee to me.

I got to give Casey some slack, Isaac.

-- Why? -- Why do I have to give him some slack?

That's the question. If you can't tell me, I can't tell the network.

-- Isaac... -- What, is ther e something going on between the two of you?

-- Absolutely not. -- Then why?

Because I owe it to him, that's why. We all do.

Now he's having some personal problems --

Oh, I know all about his problems.

You know, the network knows about his problems, too,

as a r esult of which, they become my problems.

And I'm saying that at the very most, I want them to be your problems.

-- Got it. -- Do you?

-- Yes. -- Good.

It's a genuine r enaissance, Casey.

I have lived in New York my whole lif e.

This is the time I should be sick of it, but I'm not.

-- 'Cause you'r e having a r enaissance. -- That's right.

-- Really? -- Yeah.

Nobody car es.

So how do we avoid these Helsinki mishaps in the f utur e?

-- We've been short-handed since Phil and Michael left. -- Well, hir e somebody.

Natalie's been interviewing people f or an associate producer position,

and I'm meeting her finalists this afternoon.

You guys, he is so totally cute and intense

with a dark mystery about him that says,

"This is not a technician, this is an artist."

Well, bef or e you hir e him, can you make sur e he can find Finland on a map?

You know what, Isaac? Maybe let that go.

You have Metropolitan Opera under the baton of Mr. James Levine.

-- What is he talking about? -- His New York renaissance.

-- Want to hear about it? -- No.

Good. Quickly, now -- talk to me.

7 through 17. We got the whiparound with what?

Lambeau, 3Com, and Foxboro.

Casey's got Tampa Bay and the mighty Bengals of Cincinnati.

-- What's in Cincinnati? -- Well, the mighty Bengals, for one thing.

-- They'r e gonna cut Santori. -- The placekicker?

He's made eight field-goal attempts in thr ee games

and has connected on a grand total of none of them.

-- Oh, I've met him. He's a good guy. -- Can't kick.

-- He is a good guy. -- Can't kick.

-- He'll get picked up by another team. -- No, he won't. You know why?

-- Why? -- 'Cause he can't kick.

All right, commercial one, then on to The Dugout Report --

I saw him kick in practice.

At this level, they pr etty much want you to be able to kick in a game.

Moving on, f rom center ice --

I once kicked a 12-yard field goal in a gym class.

Well, then you should get yourself a tryout f or the mighty Bengals of Cincinnati.

Ex cuse me. If anyone needs me, I'll be hurling myself out the window.

Plaza hotel, Oak Bar, dry martini.

New York at night, my f riend. This city never sleeps.

Commercial 2, then on to segment 24.

Actually, I'd like to go back to 23 if nobody minds.

Any chance we could do it a little later?

-- I want to move this along. -- The network would like me to address this now.

J.J., Dana's the producer. We like to give her the impr ession she's in charge.

[ Chuckling ]

It's just that we'r e a little short on time.

-- Segment 2 4 -- -- I have some concerns about segment 23.

Is this you or the network?

In these meetings, Casey, mine is the voice of the network.

Wow, J.J.!

What ar e your concerns?

Who is Ntozake Nelson,

and why ar e you doing a 3-minute-and-20-second f eatur e on him?

Natalie!

Ntozake Nelson's a South Af rican distance runner -- 15,000 meters.

As a schoolteacher in Jamestown, he led protests against the white majority.

That's swell, but, f olks, I have --

-- No, I -- -- Hey!

He was beaten up and thrown in jail.

His legs wer e broken, and the doctor said he'd never walk without a cane.

He's 4 1 years old, and guess what he's doing tonight.

It doesn't matter, 'cause I've alr eady changed the channel.

He's running in the World Pacific Games,

an event this network is carrying live tonight at 9:00.

The Ntozake Nelson f eatur e is promoting --

Look, I am all f or you guys spotlighting our other programming.

But can't we find a good-looking 22-year-old American who might actually win?

Well, if you find him, send him over to my place, but in the meantime --

Look, I have a ratings book on my desk that's very instructive.

Now, it says that our key demographics, including 11 - to 17-year-olds

who watch your morning r erun over br eakf ast, do not want to see f eatur es

about 41-year-old, politically oppressed Third World distance runners.

Now, they ar e instructing us, and I think it's a good idea to listen.

I've got Jason Grisham on the phone.

J.J., Danny and I have hosted shows

in the fifth- and third-largest markets in the country,

and we've r eceived awards f or journalistic ex cellence.

I'd pr ef er not to take my instructions f rom 11 -year-olds.

And the next time you sit in our rundown meeting

and I hear the voice of the network come out of your mouth,

I'm gonna put my f oot on your throat.

[ Door opens, closes ]

You ever ride the subway all day long,

I mean, just f or the f un of it?

Natalie, Kim, Elliott, everybody else,

um, you want to step outside as well, please?

Go ahead.

[ Dana clears throat ]

I'd like to apologize f or Casey's perf ormance in these meetings lately.

Dana, I'm not concerned with Casey's performance in these meetings lately.

Well, I appr eciate your understanding.

I'm concerned with Casey's perf ormance on the air lately.

-- What's your point? -- My point is...

at the moment, Casey has less on-air charm and charisma

than my high school driving instructor, and you know it, Dan.

Now, I think the time has come

f or you to think about the possibility of another partner.

I'm not gonna do the show with your high school driving instructor, J.J.,

if that's what you'r e asking me, okay, so...

Who will you do the show with?

I'll do the show with Casey.

You've got a very big f utur e at this network, Dan --

My f utur e is writing and anchoring a sports program with my partner, Casey McCall.

Now, if it's her e, it's her e. If it's not, it is someplace else.

For right now I'm gonna f orget this conversation ever took place.

Dana, Isaac, you guys need me?

No. Thanks, Dan. You'r e done.

I r eally got to admir e

the way you manhandled my staff this morning, J.J.

Look, Isaac, I have a specific --

Look...

don't take me on.

The network's not gonna wait f or ever.

[ Door opens, closes ]

It's your call, Dana.

But pr etty soon, it's gonna be my call.

'Cause her e's the thing --

I can't let it be their call.

Yeah.

They can put a Tonka truck on Mars and send me pictur es,

but I can't get a decent satellite signal f rom Buenos Air es.

Ex cuse me. Ma'am?

That's probably because of a high-pr essur e system

building up around 32 degr ees south latitude.

It'll blow by in two hours.

-- Ther e's weather in outer space? -- Uh, no, ma'am.

But I think you'r e leasing time on the East Tech keyhole satellite,

and their signal gets clear ed through a tracking station in Mexico City.

Yeah, but the point I'm making is that I can't --

Who -- Who -- Who is this?

I'm Jer emy Goodwin.

Oh, you'r e her e f or the associate producer job.

Yes, and let me just say that it is an extraordinary honor to even be asked --

-- I'm not r eady f or you yet. -- I'll sit right her e.

32 degr ees latitude.

-- South latitude. -- Ah. I get them mix ed up.

Common mistake.

-- Hey. -- Casey.

Listen, I need you to take 30 seconds off the NFL injury r eport

and give it to me f or the, uh, intro on ACC r ecruiting violations.

-- Fine. -- Thanks.

You'r e scr ewing up my show, Casey.

Keep the 30 seconds.

-- That's not what I mean. -- I know. I was joking.

-- I know you wer e joking. -- Yeah, I could tell by the way you didn't laugh at all when I said it.

That's 'cause I'm mad at you and also, it wasn't that f unny. [ Chuckles ]

Dana, did you come in her e to give me a pep talk?

'Cause if you came in her e to give me a pep talk,

can we assume that it alr eady happened, that it worked, and that I'm peppy?

Casey, sit down.

Now, I know you think that ther e ar e 250 other people in this business

-- No, I don't think ther e ar e 250 other people who can produce this show. -- who could produce this show.

Yes, you do, and whether you'r e right or whether you'r e wrong,

I'm the one that has the job, and I love it.

I love producing "Sports Night."

I don't come down till 3:00 in the morning.

I love doing "Sports Night," and you used to, too.

Now, I came in to tell you that it looks like

Cleveland's gonna go to a f our-man rotation f or the str etch drive,

I came in to tell you that it looks like

segments 16 through 21 might have to get condensed

but mostly I came in to tell you...

you ar e scr ewing up my show.

-- Natalie! -- Yo!

Let's meet with your guy.

[ Indistinct voices ]

Jer emy, this is Dana Whitaker.

-- We've met. -- Yes.

You have an impr essive r ésumé. Let me ask you some questions.

-- You look nervous. -- I'm okay.

-- Would you like a glass of water? -- Uh, no, thank you.

A soft drink? We have Fresca.

If you'r e taking orders, I'll have the angel-hair pasta and a nice merlot.

-- I'm just -- I'm just trying to make him comf ortable. -- Can we interview the man?

I know. A little prof essionalism is all I'm saying.

-- I could come back later. -- What ar e your f avorite sports?

Uh, beg your pardon.

-- Wher e ar e you strongest? -- Oh, f ootball.

-- Great. Let's talk about basketball. -- I said f ootball.

I heard you. Let's talk about basketball.

Uh, we could talk about baseball or hockey.

Oh, you'r e pr etty strong in baseball and hockey, ar e you?

-- Not as strong as f ootball, but -- -- Good. Let's talk about the Knicks.

[ Clears throat ] I walked right into that one, didn't I?

Well, I left the door wide open f or you.

-- Shot of bourbon? -- Please.

Sit.

I'm sorry. That was harsh. I hurt your f eelings.

[ Clears throat ] Name thr ee things the Knicks need to do this season

to make it to the finals.

Um, I couldn't get another question?

You will, but not till I hear an answer to the first one.

What do the Knicks...

Three things the Knicks need to do to contend.

Ms. Whitaker...

I would be great at this job.

You've got to believe me when I tell you I've been training my whole lif e f or it.

I've crunched stats, I've broken down film,

and ther e wasn't a team at my high school that didn't have me f or an equipment manager.

I have r ead every box scor e in every newspaper

that's printed in English and has a sports section,

and I have seen "Sports Night" every night since your first broadcast,

two years, two months, and a week ago today.

Now, yes, sur e, indeed.

I can tell you what Ewing and Oakley ar e shooting f rom the field

and that you'r e not gonna stop John Starks if he squar es up to the basket,

and put any def ensive pr essur e on Charlie Ward, he's gonna f old like a cheap card table,

but if you'r e asking me f or genuinely sophisticated analyses --

and I sense that you ar e --

you gotta give me some time...

at least 20 minutes.

-- Did that make any sense? -- I wasn't really listening.

-- Oh, God! It's just -- -- Jeremy, Jeremy... this is television. Things happen.

If you want to work her e, you've got to not spontaneously wig out.

Right. Right.

The Knicks.

Name thr ee things.

-- lmprove their f r ee-throw percentage. -- Yes.

-- Run the floor. -- Okay. One more.

Tell Spike Lee to sit down and shut up?

-- Ex cellent! -- Well, welcome to "Sports Night."

"Dale Earnhardt, Jeff Gordon, and Rusty Wallace

"wer e just a f ew of the big-name drivers NASCAR had on hand yesterday

-- at the Darlington Motor Speedway --" -- "yesterday, " "Speedway"?

What's the problem?

You don't want the rhyme.

You got to put "yesterday" in the second sentence.

"Just a f ew of the big-name drivers NASCAR had on hand

"at the Darlington Motor Speedway.

The pr ess event, held yesterday to announce that --"

Hey, we have to talk.

What's up?

Well, I've been thinking about this f or a while.

I mean, I want you to know that I've given this some thought.

I think "yesterday" has got to go in the first sentence. I'll tell you why.

I'm thinking about leaving the show.

For how long?

I've been thinking about it f or a while now.

No, I didn't ask you how long you wer e thinking about leaving the show.

I asked you how long you wer e thinking about leaving the show for.

For good.

Did you get an off er?

No, I didn't get an off er, Danny. I'm not -- I'm not going to another show.

I'm talking about getting out of sports.

-- Why? -- Look, I'm just tired of it.

-- All right? -- You'r e tir ed of what?

"But first this --

"Sacramento power f orward Jason Grisham was r eleased

by a judge in Houston this morning after posting a $5,000 bond."

Which, by the way, he paid in cash he happened to have in his pocket.

So Jason Grisham's a jackass. You know Jason Grisham.

Look, I got into this 'cause I like getting people to like sports.

And I've turned into a P.R. man f or punks and thugs.

Now any atrocity, no matter how ridiculous or hideous or childish --

it doesn't matter -- I make it sports.

10-cent bagman whacks a skater's leg with a crowbar -- that's sports.

second-round draft pick gets cranky in a Houston bar, and that's sports.

And let's not f orget the mother of all gr eat sports stories --

a double homicide in Br entwood.

If you want to talk, I'm all f or it.

Really, I am. But let's talk about what you need to talk about, okay?

The moral decay in American sports isn't the problem her e, all right?

Look, it is the problem.

I -- Look, I have a 7-year-old son

that I get to see on Wednesdays

and alternate weekends, and these ar e his heroes.

And now, six days a week, they'r e also his male role models.

Well, quitting your job ought to do the trick.

-- Look, Danny, I know I'm leaving you in the lurch -- -- No, I mean it.

You should definitely quit your job, because that way, sports will be good again. Yeah.

A-Also, your wife, she'll take you back,

and you can be a role model f or your son, knowing as we do how --

how women and childr en, you know, admir e the bitter and the unemployed.

-- Ar e you mental? -- I'll see you at airtime.

Yeah, one thing you definitely don't want to do is talk to your f riends.

You know, I wouldn't do that.

Hey, I know you'r e pissed, and that's fine,

but canning the sarcasm wouldn't be out of line.

"Fine" and "line" rhymed. I'd move "fine" to the second sentence.

Danny, you'r e gonna find another partner.

Anybody would kill to do this show with you.

I've been her e every day, Casey --

every day -- and I have kept my mouth shut

because that's what you asked me to do.

But if you'd have asked me,

I'd have told you that Lisa is an angry, unhappy, punishing woman,

and in 10 years ther e's never been a single moment

that has suggested to me she has any aff ection f or you at all.

And I have no patience f or people like that.

Now, the people her e, they like you --

Isaac, Natalie, Kim, Elliott.

I don't know who this new guy, Jer emy, is, but he seems to like you just fine.

Have you even noticed that Dana's been keeping

J.J. and the network away f rom you with a whip and a chair, huh?

Have you noticed that she's been risking her job for you every day?

And do you r eally think, my f riend, it has that much to do with your talent?

These ar e people who like you, okay,

-- Guys... -- and know what you've been going through,

-- and f or thr ee months now, you have shown us nothing but the back of your hand, -- Guys...

and now you'r e gonna show us the door?

Well, ex cuse me, all right,

but the wisdom of your decision isn't entir ely clear to me her e.

-- Okay? Yeah, I'm pissed. -- Ex cuse me. Fellas...

And you know what? I'm tir ed of it.

-- Dan! Casey! -- What?!

Ther e's something going on you'r e gonna want to see. Come on!

[ Footsteps depart rapidly ]

[ Telephones ringing ]

[ Indistinct voices ]

Hey.

Hey. Hey, what's going on?

Check it out.

Oh, we need audio! Yo!

That time can't be right. Danny. Danny...

Danny, can that time be right?

Man on TV: ...absolutely crazy!

With 900 meters left, at 41 years old,

Ntozake Nelson is on a pace to absolutely shatter the world record!

Go ahead on, old man.

Is he gonna do this?

-- Does it look like he's planning on slowing down? -- Come on.

-- Bring it. -- Bring it on.

Come on! Move it!

Go! Come on!

Go!

[ Cheers and applause ]

All chanting: Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!

Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!

Lisa! Lisa, Lisa, it's me!

Listen, I need you to do something f or me. I'm sorry.

I need you to wake up Charlie and give him the phone f or a second.

B-Because I need you to!

[ Cheering continues ]

Charlie!

l-lt's dad. Hey, uh, did you finish all your homework?

Good. Turn on your TV. Turn to my channel.

I want you to watch this.

This guy's name is Ntozake Nelson.

Now, look, I'll call you tomorrow. I'll tell you all about it.

But f or now, you just watch him run.

'Cause he's not doing much.

He's just running f aster than any man's ever run bef or e.

I'm gonna be on the air in about 12 minutes,

and if Mom says it's okay, you can watch the beginning of the show.

Then I'm gonna give you the special signal.

That means you got to turn off your TV and go to sleep.

I love you, too, Charlie.

[ Receiver hangs up ]

[ Cheers and applause ]

Listen up. They'r e gonna bounce to us f or a 15-second promo at the end of the race.

Natalie, get the first team in the studio.

Elliott, Kim, let's go.

I need graphics!

-- We need Casey. -- Okay. Got it.

I'll take car e of him.

[ Indistinct voices ]

You okay?

Absolutely.

Get to work.

Absolutely.

[ Telephone ringing ]

It's a 15-second teaser, Dan. You need copy?

-- Is the opening Lakers/Sonics? -- Lakers/Sonics, Pistons/Heat.

-- I'll take it. -- You want it?

It's not that my teasers ar e better than yours, Danny,

it's just that yours ar e vastly inf erior to mine.

I'm new her e, so, uh, if I'm in your way, you just let me know.

[ Chair rattles, thud ]

No problem.

-- Daniel. -- What?

You wer e right. I was wrong. It won't happen again.

Man: 15 seconds.

You want to do something tonight after the show?

Yeah. You know, I was gonna ride the Staten Island Ferry f or a while, eat a hot dog. You want to come?

Yeah, absolutely, and I'll tell you why.

'Cause it's 17 degr ees outside with the windchill,

so what I want to do is stand in a boat

in the middle of New York Harbor at half-past midnight.

-- You have a better idea? -- Well, we could go to a bar,

find some people we don't like, and beat the crap out of them.

Heads up.

In 3...2...1 .

I'm Casey McCall alongside Dan Rydell.

Lakers/Sonics, Pistons/Heat, and guess what.

Ntozake Nelson's got something to say about a world r ecord.

Seeing is believing, so stick around f or "Sports Night,"

-- coming at the top of the hour. -- He's back.

You'll be glad you did.

Man: We're out.

We'r e up in nine minutes.

Dana, could you come her e f or a second?

Do you have any idea how to spell Ntozake?

-- What do you want? -- I want you to come here.

What?

No one...can produce this show but you.

[ Jazz music plays ]

[ Clears throat ] You...have nine minutes.

Somebody get him a new shirt.

What's wrong with my shirt?

You got my mascara on your collar.

-- Natalie? -- Yeah.

Get somebody on the phone. I want to make sur e ther e ar en't going to be any mistakes.

-- I'm nervous about the satellite f eed f rom Buenos Air es. -- Sur e.

-- Natalie? -- Yeah.

-- Argentina. -- Right.

Natalie!

Um...double-check that.

You know what? Her e's something I don't understand about rugby.

Oh, you do understand something about rugby?

I've played rugby, all right? Now, I want to ask you --

Wait. Wait. W-When have you played rugby bef or e?

When I was in college I played...coed rugby.

[ Laughing ] You did not play rugby.

I played rugby. I want to ask you a question...

[ Rock music plays ]