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Who's hungry?
Oh, I got eggs, I got bacon, I got tots.
And I just remembered
you can't eat today
because of your bypass.
Joyce, the agreement was
I was gonna be alone until my surgery.
Yeah, I know, I know.
I didn't tell anyone you were here,
per our agreement.
But I just need to make sure you've got everything you need.
You really don't.
Fuzzy slippers, bedpan.
You know, sometimes it feels good
to just roll over and let loose.
Joyce.
We've had a lot of laughs here.
And a lot of tears.
Keep talking.
Remember that time we got stuck in the elevator
for, like, two hours?
Wait, that was just me.
Did I ever tell you about that?
OK, in addition to your shift assignments,
please remember that Ron's surgery is coming up soon,
and I need everyone's contributions
for his get-well package.
- When's he having it again? - I don't know yet.
But he'll let me know as soon as it's scheduled.
Are we gonna do an Edible Arrangement?
- Parker, no. I think we can do something
a little more thoughtful than that.
That's what you sent me when I had my appendix out.
Right. Well, that was, um...
Also, please remember to sign up
for Ron's meal train, OK?
Yeah, Ron and I have a really special relationship.
I'll never forget the first thing he said to me
when I started here.
"There's a lot of stupid people working in this hospital."
And he's said it almost every day since.
But he's never lumped me in with them,
and that is an honor I take really seriously.
Some of you have not signed the get-well card yet.
Val? - Yeah, I'm not gonna do that.
He needs to be alive to read it, and...
- Oh, come on. He's gonna be fine.
Unless he's not.
- Maybe I shouldn't sign. I don't want to jinx it.
I already wrote "M."
- You're signing. Everyone is signing.
Why would you put that out there?
I always like to assume the worst.
If it ends up going well, it's a nice surprise.
If it doesn't, I've already made peace with it.
So, yeah...
Ron's not gonna make it.
Ron will be fine!
I turned the M into a butterfly just to be safe.
It looks like a weird butt.
Oh, no.
So I heard you're going with a no-touch vein harvest
for Ron's surgery... nice, classic.
Yep, pretty standard at this point.
Yeah, for sure, for sure.
And I assume you've read Dr. Hiyashi's study
on increased risk of graft failure?
No. Why? What did it say?
Uh, it was paywalled.
So I didn't... but the headline was pretty...
- Bruce. - Yep?
I need to catch up on notes
and prep for Ron's procedure later.
So if you could please...
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
The surgery's today? - Yes.
And I'm behind on paperwork 'cause I was out of town
at my sister's bachelorette all weekend.
- Oh, OK. Bachelorette, nice.
Where'd you go? - Vegas.
I'm sorry... Vegas, as in Las?
That's the one.
Anyways, I'm sure you have
some more social cues to not pick up on.
So I'll leave you to it.
- Sin City... not really a destination
known for a good night's sleep and getting your head right.
God knows what drugs Emerson was snorting
off a stripper's gyrating pelvis at 5:00 a.m.
And now she's gonna operate on Ron?
My Ron?
Ha... over my dead body.
Or Ron's, if I don't get to the bottom of this.
I know.
Ron wants his privacy.
Well, I've known the guy for 30 years,
and he wants a comfy pillow more, so...
Who wants a pillow?
No! - Joyce!
God, ! No!
Stop! No! - Come on!
Ugh.
Hey, I really didn't see that much.
- You saw my whole butt! - OK.
Can we just move past this, please?
- It was more than your butt. Just...
- Please go! - Yeah.
Look, Ron, I know there's a little
intimacy disparity right now.
So I'm just gonna put it out there...
if you need to take a quick look at my area,
I just need a couple minutes to clean up.
- Go! - Go... yeah, got it.
Oh, hey, can I talk to you for a second?
Oh, totally, we should.
Yeah, just about, you know.
Yes, definitely.
Uh, I need to get these to Dr. Andrews.
Chat in 10? - Yeah.
I'll come find you in 10 minutes.
- OK. - 600 seconds.
Countdown initiate.
What am I saying?
So this will probably come as a surprise to you guys, but...
I've actually had a crush on Serena
ever since I started working here.
And last Friday...
something happened with us.
It was great.
It was one of those perfect moments.
But when it ended, I kind of said
the first thing that popped into my head.
All right, um...
I'll see you Monday.
So stupid.
I barely slept all weekend.
I mean, I waited two years to kiss this girl,
and the most romantic thing I could think of was,
"See you Monday."
That's what I'd say to my garbage man.
And nothing against Chuck.
Super nice guy.
Always beeps the horn for me.
But I just don't see us kissing.
Matt and I made out.
And it was actually great.
Like, really great.
But then I didn't hear from him all weekend,
which is not what I expected from Matt.
I mean, I know his phone plan still charges him $0.35 a text.
But I don't know.
So we all chipped in
and bought this fancy new driver for Ron.
And then I found this golf bag on eBay.
So we've all been signing it and writing, like,
heartfelt little messages to let him know we care.
Guys, who wrote, "Whack dem balls?"
Ew, why are you knitting?
Is your husband at sea?
It's a heart.
I'm making a head cover for his driver.
Just wanted him to have something
kind of special from me.
When white women get spooked,
they often turn to arts and crafts.
Alex?
Hm?
I'm a Peeping Tom.
I peeped.
I walked in on a patient when they were naked.
So what? That happens, like, all the time.
Yeah, but this is someone I know.
Well, you're a doctor, Joyce.
I'm sure they're probably over it.
No, Ron is not gonna forget something like this.
Wait, Ron?
As in, like, Ron, Ron? - Oh, my God.
I wrote a funny message on his golf bag
about his balls, and it's gonna be
totally misconstrued now.
So Ron is getting his surgery today?
- He's here? - Yes.
Shh!
All right, he swore me to secrecy.
So now I'm swearing you all to secrecy.
Ron isn't here.
Huh? Huh?
OK?
- I mean, I guess. - Great.
Can, uh, someone take the bullet for me
about the "whack dem balls?"
No.
Tell her I died, Chris.
Go out there and tell her that...
You said "come in," right?
- Uh, Brandon, what... what are you...
Joyce told us you were up here.
Of course she did.
I know what you're going through.
My uncle had a bypass surgery.
So I know how scary and brutal it is.
He didn't make it.
But he was super old,
like 49.
Well, thank you, Brandon,
for those extremely comforting words.
Now, if you don't mind...
Ron!
I can't.
You don't have to.
I can't!
Um, I'm gonna film a TikTok
with you in the background.
Do you mind pretending you're unconscious
for, like, 30 seconds?
Divas, divas, wake up!
Diva alert. We got a diva down, OK?
Hey.
Uh, hey.
Everything OK?
Yeah.
No, I, um... I've been in my head
kind of pretty bad since the other day.
- Oh? - Yeah.
I just feel embarrassed about it and...
OK.
Well, Linda's pregnant again.
- Oh. - Wow. Um, that's...
Congratulations.
It's a surprise.
We had a few glasses of wine
watching the live-action "Aladdin" and...
We got reckless.
Sure.
Sampson just started applying to colleges.
Now we're going back in the weeds.
Keith, could you give us just, like, two minutes...
And our rescue dog, Kaiju, ooh,
he's gotten really territorial
ever since we gave him the master bedroom.
Well, it seems like you two have a lot to talk about.
So I'll leave you to it.
- Oh, thanks, Serena. - Um, sorry...
I guess a little boy time is in order.
Uh, can we... can we talk for two seconds?
- You know, on the plus side... - Yeah.
I am looking forward to busting out
my old breastfeeding vest.
Oh, cool.
So, kind of thought we were both excited about the kiss.
But I guess Matt's in his head.
So now I'm in my head.
Happy for Keith, though.
Or concerned.
I don't know.
I wasn't paying attention.
I understand why Ron didn't want people
to know he was here.
Most people's worst nightmare is, like,
dying in a tsunami or a plane crash.
But for Ron, it's being trapped in an emotional conversation
with a minor acquaintance.
But, you know, it's me.
So I'm just gonna hop in there
and see him real quick before he goes under.
Uh, are you guys all here to see Ron?
Of course.
It wouldn't be right if I didn't see him
before the surgery.
Right, yeah.
OK.
Sorry, I just didn't know y'all were close, so.
People like me, Alex.
I don't know why that's so hard for you.
- No, I didn't... I just meant...
How are you guys holding up?
I heard about Dr. Leonard, and I came as soon as I could.
And... and you know him from the gift shop?
And the parking lot
and from holding the door sometimes.
Yeah.
Oh, man.
I was checking out the highlights
of that Vegas trip on Insta.
I thought I blocked you.
I have my niece's login info.
But, yeah, it looked like quite the rager.
Law-abiding did not seem to be on the menu.
We went to see the Jabbawockeez.
Uh-huh, a little musical aperitif.
Main course being what?
A little E? A little K?
Big H? - Sorry.
I'm just not used to you
asking me questions about myself.
We only went on four dates, so we never got to that.
What? I asked you questions.
Yeah, like whether your shirt was too tight for your biceps.
- It's still a question. - I gotta get to the PACU.
Oh, think fast.
Now, I know you didn't just throw my M&M's.
Um...
Did you see those dulled reflexes on Emerson?
I mean, she barely reacted at all.
And now there's candy all over the floor.
What if that had been Ron's aorta?
"The woods are lovely, dark and deep.
"But I have promises to keep
"and miles to go before I sleep.
And miles to go before I sleep."
Keith, I've decided to die.
- No, no, no, no. Keith, what are you doing here?
Just giving him a little dose of old Bobby Frost.
OK, no, you got to get out.
Get out.
You promised me privacy.
Yeah, and they promised me they wouldn't let you know
how I betrayed your promise.
So think about how I feel.
In the last 30 minutes, I've been hugged,
sung to, and prayed over.
Well, there's no excuse for that.
I'm so sorry.
You promised me privacy.
Now you gotta keep your word and get them out of here.
They just care about you, Ron.
No, get them out, or I'm rescheduling my surgery
and I'm gonna go over to Portland General.
All right, all right, I'll get them out of here,
and I'll find you a new place to hide, OK?
Oh, um, Jeannie from the cafeteria is outside.
She's got a guitar with her.
Are you at all curious?
No one. Go!
OK.
Hey. No, no, no.
Ron does not want any more visitors.
So please just go, OK?
Go back to work. Shoo.
I'm sorry, Jeannie.
Sorry. Uh, Joyce?
I'm just gonna pop in there real quick
and see him before he goes back.
Alex, honey, we all like to believe we're special,
but he does not want to see anybody else, OK?
In fact, he threatened to go to Portland General
if anyone else goes in there.
So just forget it, OK?
OK, I...
Well, I... I thought I had
a special relationship with Ron.
But, um, maybe everybody thinks that, so...
um, yeah, I don't know.
I just feel a little silly, that's all.
Here we go.
No one will bother you in here.
So you can just lay back and tune everything out, OK?
- All right. - All right.
See?
Big J is taking care of you just like she promised.
Well, all I wanted to do was be left alone.
And you are alone, except for Big J.
But I'm gonna go over here and shh, you know.
Whoa, nope, nope!
Don't come in!
I'm saying that as a woman.
It's about Ron.
He's not here.
OK, good.
He shouldn't hear this.
I don't trust Dr. Emerson to perform his bypass.
What?
She spent all weekend in Vegas.
And, yes, Las Vegas. I asked.
OK, hold on, hold on.
What if she screws up the aortic incision
and he bleeds out? - Right.
Well, why don't we go talk about this on the roof?
'Cause it's so pretty outside. - OK.
What if they save his body but his brain dies?
Well, now his orifices are at the mercy
of some sicko patient tech.
OK, so this is, um, roof talk.
Let's go there now.
Ron will have more hands inside of him than the Muppets.
OK, false alarm.
That was just Bruce being Bruce.
Um, Ron?
Uh...
Well, I tried to do things the right way.
I questioned Emerson directly.
I went up the chain of command.
I threw candy at her.
Well, now, I got to take matters into my own hands,
as have so many heroes from history.
A hair sample will show everything in Emerson's system.
Now, don't ask me how I got it.
But let's just say that I have friends
who are always down to do Old Brucie a favor.
Hey. Sorry about that.
Keith was trying to sell me his RV.
Guy's having a tough day. - Yeah.
So you were saying you messed up
and were embarrassed all weekend.
Yes. Or wait, no. What?
I, um...
Um, OK, you know when something's, like, really good,
but then you say something that messes it up?
- You OK, sir? - Yeah, I'm good.
Just passing a stone.
- Keep going. - OK.
- I just... - Help!
I should really go check on him.
- Yeah, no, for sure. I... just... just really quick.
I... I want to make...
I should...
- Yeah, yeah, yeah. Totally. - Yeah.
Can you... yeah.
Feel better, sir.
So for Ron's meal train,
I'm making Green Goddess Vegan Tempeh,
assuming I can find fair-trade tamari by Friday.
OK, I don't think Ron will...
You know what? Go for it. What do I know?
Hey, Alex.
Oh, what a great day.
Everything's going according to plan.
I'm lying.
Ron's surgery is in 30 minutes, and he's missing.
What do you mean, he's missing?
I'm unable to locate him.
You know, the traditional definition of missing.
You lost a man about to have a triple bypass?
I had to get rid of Bruce.
He kept talking about Ron dying.
And by the time I got back, he was gone.
Yeah, he's probably freaked out.
Well, it wasn't all about dying.
Some of it was about him becoming a vegetable
and his body being messed with by the staff.
- Oh, OK. Well, that's all right, then.
Jesus, Joyce!
Well, that's why I took Bruce up to the roof.
We're saying the same thing.
Huh, so weird.
The lab just emailed me my full drug panel results.
Huh.
That is so weird.
Jeez, what did it say?
All negs? Nothing pos?
So you don't know anything about this?
No, I don't. I'm sorry.
See, that's funny, 'cause it says,
"Ordered by Dr. Bruce Schweitz."
Well, you just tricked me there.
So I think that makes us even.
All right. I am so over this.
Are you seriously questioning my integrity?
Look, I had to make sure that, you know,
you were on top of your game today.
Vegas, the Jabbawockeez...
I would never compromise a patient's safety.
- I know, I know. - How could you even say...
I can't lose Ron, OK?
I... I mean, I like the guy.
We're close.
And I've lost people close to me,
and it sucks.
And I don't want to go through that again.
So I'm sorry, but I had to check.
I knew it.
I mean, I checked the vending machines first
and the second floor vending machines.
But if you weren't there, I... I knew it.
I'm just taking a moment to myself.
Right. Totally get it.
Um, well, they'll be ready for you soon,
um, but you can just hang out here until then.
Hey, hold on a sec.
Yeah.
Can you wait with me until they're ready?
Um, sure, yeah.
- Thank you. - Mm-hmm.
Just so you know, if you had told me
that you were having surgery
and said you wanted to be left alone,
I would have respected that.
I think I would have.
80%.
Well, do me a favor.
When it's done, can you call Michael and Keisha
and tell them that I had bypass surgery today
and it went fine?
What?
Ron, did you not tell your kids about this?
Alex,
I didn't tell my family
I was having bypass surgery today
because I didn't want to worry the people in my family.
Oh.
Well, that's a really stupid plan, Ron.
Sorry.
Give me a shot of Papaverine, above the subclavial.
So this sucks.
Ugh, the waiting is the hardest part.
It's like that song
about the waiting being the hardest part.
What is the name of that song?
"Mambo Number Five."
Right.
God!
What a waste.
These masks are way too tight.
The, uh, surgery's going great.
- What the hell, Bruce? You scared the crap out of us.
- Not me. - Please.
Emerson is kicking ass and taking names in there.
Wow, the woman knows her way around a Glauber clamp.
Nimble fingers.
Smooth, creamy skin.
Mm.
Uh, so Ron, huh?
Yeah.
It's so weird.
Usually when things are tense,
what calms me down is like, oh, Ron's here.
But now I feel like I need a Ron for Ron.
Yeah, he is very grounding.
He sure was.
Sorry, is.
Either way.
Nothing's gonna happen to him, Val.
Right? - Of course not.
He'll be fine.
I have to say, all of us sitting around here,
you know, being there for Ron in his hour of need...
he would hate it.
To be fair, he hates a lot of things.
Sweden. - Oh, my God.
He's never been there.
He doesn't know any Swedes.
Hates Sweden.
He's been really vocal about that
the last couple months. - Yeah.
That's because IKEA wouldn't let him return an ottoman.
He said it was "symptomatic of a larger political failing."
You know, Ron is not
as negative as he wants us to believe.
When I first started working here,
he was the fun one...
the one who would organize happy hours
or take you out if you had a rough day,
make you feel special.
No, come on. Ronny?
Actually, when I started here,
Ron took me out for burgers and shakes.
Told me not to tell anyone.
Didn't want to get a reputation for being generous.
But that was really nice.
- Huh. He did that with me, too.
Oh, my God, same.
Yeah, we didn't do that.
What a man.
What a good man.
Probably too many burgers and shakes, though,
heart-wise. - Absolutely.
Yeah, I'm seeing a pattern.
Definitely.
OK, let's remove that Bulldog,
get some blood flowing in the IMA graft.
Hey, how you holding up?
Um, I don't know.
Tense. - Yeah.
Um, look, I know it's odd timing,
but I'm sorry if I've, like, made anything weird.
I mean, it didn't start weird,
until you didn't text me all weekend.
And now you're all cagey and embarrassed about the kiss.
No. No, no, no, no.
I... I'm embarrassed because I said,
"All right, see you Monday."
Oh.
Yeah, that was weird. - Yeah.
I don't know where that came from.
Actually, I do.
You make me nervous.
The way I feel towards you makes me really nervous.
But to be perfectly clear,
I really liked kissing you,
and I'd really like to do it again.
I mean, not here, but...
Shut up, you weirdo.
Oh. Look at that.
Go, Matty.
Finally.
Hey, guys.
Ron did great. He's in recovery.
You can check on him in a bit.
Thank God.
- Oh, Val. - Val.
- You're OK. - Yeah.
- Thank you, Brooke. - Thank you, Brooke.
A lot of times, I get caught up
in thinking of this hospital as a business.
For the past year, I've been obsessed
with trying to expand, to grow, to succeed.
But we are more than that.
You know what we do here,
what we really do here,
is we give people time.
Time with their loved ones.
Time to connect, to laugh,
to tell each other how they really feel
before it's too late.
All right, see you Tuesday.
And I need to remember the real value of this place.
At St. Denis, we... we make time.
And that is an amazing slogan.
It just came out of me.
I'm writing that down.
I just wrote a friggin' billboard.
Bruce.
Hey, Ron. How you feeling?
Everything went perfect.
You just take it easy, pal.
Where's my...
where's my Joyce?
Hmm.
Joyce.
- Well, that's interesting. - Yeah.
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