All language subtitles for Best Medicine s01e13 Norway No How.eng

[Martin] Previously
on Best Medicine...

[Geneva] We're getting
a sister city.

You have a friend
across the ocean in Port Wenn.

Why are they trying so hard?

[Louisa] Maybe you could try
harder at being less negative.

I didn't even know
you guys were married.

We didn't wanna
make a fuss, so we went

to a Justice of the Peace
five years ago.

- I wanna have a baby.
- I know a specialist.

- Mm.
- Fertility. One of the best.

- How do you know Martin?
- We used to date.

I demand to know
the real reason for your visit.

A Nordic ocean-based
salmon farm.

- In our beautiful bay?
- Well...

We'll have to see everything in
detail.

Geneva already signed.

[Sarah] Huh?

- [gavel banging]
- [people clamoring]

Hey, come on now.
Come on now, gentle people.

This isn't like us!
Let's use our inside voices.

We welcome you to our town.

- And you have lied to our faces!
- Yes!

You know, I learned three
Norwegian phrases for you.

And now I learned a fourth.

[speaking in Norwegian]

- Yeah!
- Yeah!

- Al-all right.
- This is so boring.

There is supposed
to be food here.

- Why would you do that?
- [Geneva] This is all my fault.

I should have read that sister
city agreement more carefully.

Geneva you can't blame
yourself. They tricked us.

It's not exactly a trick when
the whole thing was spelled out

on paper in black and white and
no one bothered to look at it.

Okay, one at a time,
one at a time!

- This is a mess!
- George.

Thank you, Franklin. Listen,
I've done my research, okay?

"Waste
from industrial salmon farms

kill fish from surrounding
waters, and all vegetation,

decimating entire ecosystems."

Not to mention
what it does to our lobstering.

It's gone! Adios, kaputs!

And can we be honest about

the real crime here?
Our gorgeous views.

We'll be absolutely ruined by
these ugly rusty fish prisons.

- [indistinct chatter]
- It's post-apocalyptic.

- Yeah!
- All right. Yeah.

- You know, he's kind of right.
- You know...

Like, fish prisons
are so not cool.

This is the world
we're inheriting.

You have all the authority
of a box of ribbons.

- [gavel banging]
- [Glendon] Please, please.

- Please.
- [booing]

- Let's show some...
- [booing]

Please, let's show
some Port Wenn civility

and let our new friends
from Norway speak.

You're the one who
masterminded this whole thing.

- Yes!
- Yes.

'Cause maybe I know
what's best for us.

- What? What?
- Really?

Small towns all over
this country are crumbling.

Our own school was shut down!

Folks, we need help.

Sigrid, you have a presentation?

- God morgen.
- Morning.

We, your sister city
of Fjordhavn,

only want what's best
for both of us.

Once the happy
salmon house is constructed,

each month will bring
a wonderful dividend check,

to be paid to every family
of Port Wenn,

every month,
sharing in the profits.

- Damn AI. End of the world.
- Every month?

[stammering]
Maybe we should hear them out.

Also, nothing is more important
than keeping our oceans

safe and clean. Uh...

Um, we work with our
happy host towns holistically

to keep, uh, to keep the...

- [groaning]
- Sigrid?

[mumbles]

[singing in Norwegian]

Ah, yes. This can only mean
the one thing.

- [singing in Norwegian]
- It is time.

[singing in Norwegian]

- [gasps] Oh! Oh.
- [water breaking]

[all gasping]

- The baby is coming.
- Whoa!

You ever deliver a baby before?

[theme music]

- Where's the towel?
- Let's put this coat...

- Under your head.
- What do I do?

Boil water? Isn't that a thing?

[Ludvig] It's so
funny, we always know when

Sigrid's water
is about to break.

When she sings
Lille Petter Edderkopp.

It's the same as your
itty-bitty spider song. Yes.

Yes, but American women don't
normally announce their labor

in song. Louisa,
I need more clean towels.

Can you give me a warm
washcloth? Mark.

Need you to pour hot water
on a pair of scissors.

- And then bring it back to me.
- Are you sure...

We can't get to the hospital
in time?

No, it will be any moment.

- Okay.
- This is my fourth birth.

Sigrid gave birth
in the middle of a dinner party

and was back in time
for the Kvaefjordkake.

- Sounds delicious.
- Hey, um, listen, I don't care.

But you know how bloody these
things can typically get.

Like, I don't care,
but d'you know?

Elaine, I know. He told me.

- What? He told you what?
- About his blood phobia.

What? And you didn't tell me
when you know that I know?

- Well, I- This is not the time.
- We're roommates.

No, it's not! Sorry.

- Here, here, here.
- Okay, just...

[Martin] You need
to keep this area

extremely clean
because this baby is...

- [yawning]
- [Elaine] Incoming.

Whoa! Ha-ha.

- Oh!
- Well, what is that?

- Is it very bloody? No?
- No. No.

Now that is unusual!

Not that I would know,
but do all babies look like...

Bear cubs?

This baby appears to be healthy,

but it does have
an unusual case of lanugo.

Now it is normal
in pre-term babies, but-

I think what he's trying to say
is that

you've got
one hairy baby there.

No, it is fine.
We will love him just the same.

Now is time
to capture the placenta.

- Oh!
- Ugh!

- Ooh.
- Capture?

- What's placenta?
- Dude, you don't wanna know.

We need to take it home
to fertilize a new rose bush.

We did that
for all our children.

We have one named
for each child.

- Sweet.
- That's gross.

This little Chewbacca
is adorable.

- [chuckles]
- [baby cooing]

Here is your placenta.

I assume you're going to
the hospital in Bar Harbor now.

What for?
I give birth, I move on.

You need an obstetric follow-up.

Uh, the baby's body hair,
the extremity of it

could signify
other more serious issues.

We can address that
back in Norway.

[speaking in Norwegian]

Please, you are making
Sigrid's headache worse.

A headache?
Did it come on suddenly?

It could be a warning sign
of preeclampsia.

I get headaches
after I give birth.

They go away.
And now we do, too.

No, listen,
this could be very ser-

Oh, perhaps you're trying
to distract us

from the salmon farm. Sorry.

The salmon farm is happening
whether you like it or not.

[suspenseful music]

- Martin.
- Mm-hmm.

- Mm...
- Martin.

[seagulls squawking]

"Adrenal hyperplasia,

Cushing Syndrome..."

I know you know there is
a full waiting room out here.

The hair was just too coarse
for normal lanugo.

Could be hormonal imbalance, and
not to mention her headaches,

which could be an indicator
of potential stroke-

Doc, those sketch Norwegians and
their little Sasquatch

don't deserve
an inch of your brain space.

What is it? Where are you going?

- I'll be right back.
- What?

[Elaine] Doc, what am I
gonna tell everyone?

Elaine, is it true
that you're going to New York

next week for your big audition?

Juilliard!
Yeah, yup, I got a call back.

- [Simon] Well...
- Oh, wonderful!

- Knock 'em dead, kiddo.
- Thank you. Yeah, I'm excited.

Gonna take a bite
out of the Big Apple.

- [laughter]
- [applause]

[somber music]

[Simon] Hey, when you get
to be rich and famous,

are you gonna remember
us regular people?

[scoffs] Are you kidding?

I wanna be like, "Who are you?
Call my agent."

[laughing]

- Go back to Norwegia!
- [indistinct]

- Blondie!
- What exactly are you doing?

We know you still
let the Norwegians stay here.

Spineless capitalists.

We're bringing the protests
to their doorstep.

They pose an existential threat
to, what, something.

I've seen yard sales
more convincing!

- What?
- Listen.

If you're gonna pick at us,
you need more people,

better chance, and some
theatrics. This is pathetic!

What do you know
about protesting?

[chuckles]

If you only knew what we did

to change the world.

- Morning, Paul.
- Hey, Paul.

- Hi, Paul.
- [Paul] Mornin'.

You just gonna let him walk in?

- No human chain? Nothing?
- I don't know what that is.

- What's a human chain?
- Go.

And don't come back
until you've got more teams,

more heart,
and tons more razzmatazz.

- Go! Go!
- Okay.

- Read some books!
- So angry.

I believe the children
are the future. That's a lie.

These danishes,
they really look quite good.

- Hm.
- Yeah.

Are Sigrid and the baby here?

No, they are down by the docks,

winning the hearts
of the fishermen.

She really is a wonderful person

once you get past
how scary she is.

Well, that sounds like
a perfectly horrific marriage.

You need to get her
to come see me right away.

Me, Ludvig,
tell the greatest Viking queen

that she must see
a small-town doctor

who dresses like an accountant?

Uh, please, excuse me,
I have a moment to nap,

and I will take it.

Fine, I'll talk to your
five-foot Viking queen myself.

Martin, we were talking.

Don't you know any big-city
lawyers that we can call who can

help us fight these nasty, but
extremely attractive Norwegians?

But there's nothing to be done.
You signed the contract.

Besides, uh, the amount of money

and years it would take
to prove fraud...

My concern right now
is Sigrid and her baby.

- What?
- How can you say that?

You know, the teens were right,
we should never let them

or their nasty placenta box
stay here.

That's right.

I forgot you're storing
the placenta here.

- Oh. I can't even...
- Um... Don't make me gag.

No, the placenta
is the black box of pregnancy.

Where is it?

[suspenseful music]

- Oh, dear, that's awful!
- Nope!

That's what happened
to my pad thai.

Try this one.

Looks normal in shape and size.

No lesions.

[sniffing]

- But the smell.
- Is it bad?

- Like her.
- What do you mean?

Well, we can't gossip

about our customers, doc.

Well, that would be a first.

But that sister is ripe.

How do you mean?
Uh, can you describe it?

I could, but I'd rather not.

Well, that could signify
an infection.

None of this is right.

Or if something catastrophic
were to happen to her,

I'd never forgive myself.

- What are you doing?
- Help, help! Hold it!

- That's the knife.
- Oh!

That was close.

[instrumental music]

[bells tolling]

[Sigrid] As we say in Norway,

many small streams
make one big river.

We will flow together
beautifully.

One big river, my ass.

Sarah. God morgen!

I was hoping to see you this
morning.

Cut the bull crap, Ms. Norway.

You know, I heard
your house is up for sale.

- So sad.
- Who told you that?

I will buy it for you. I'll put
the house under your name.

In return, you could help
smooth things

over for me in the town.

Sigrid, I'd rather live
in this bait shop

than take you up on your offer.

See, I can't be bought.

Oh, you have such strong spirit.

In Norway
we call this sta pa vilje.

The will to keep standing.

In America we call it

sleep with one eye open.

[tense music]

[engine revving]

[car honking]

[Sarah] What are you doing here?

Looking for Sigrid and her baby,
so I can examine them.

Martin, why is it
that not once have you tried

to help us figure out
how to fight these guys?

Why are you
on the side of the enemy?

Sorry. There's no sides
in medicine.

Well, there's sides
in Port Wenn.

[woman] Here you go.
[man] Thank you.

[woman] Have a good one.

- You're feeling okay?
- Oh, calm down.

I just needed a little rest.

If you're here
to change my mind

about the salmon farm,
don't waste your breath.

I'm not, I'm just here
to take your blood pressure

to make sure there were
no complications with the birth.

You are unpleasant and stubborn.

And you're a liar and a cheat.

Roll up your sleeve.

[baby cooing]

Blood pressure
is slightly elevated, but okay.

[baby cooing]

[sniffing]

- What are you doing?
- [sniffing] Smelling you.

Your placenta smelled bad.

And frankly, so do you.
You smell like rotten eggs.

Why were you smelling
my placenta? And me?

Is this your idea of funsy time?

Trust me,
sitting next to a smelly,

possible sociopath
is not my idea of a good-

- Oh, go away, you crazy man!
- I can't.

Your baby could have
a hormonal imbalance,

and your smell could be
an indicator of an infection.

Now I need to examine you both.

[sighs] Fine.
I will come see you tomorrow.

- Happy?
- Yes.

And you. We are having another
Town Hall meeting tonight.

- Will you be coming?
- No.

I may be treating you,
but I find

your business tactics appalling.

[baby grunting]

Oh, are you hungry,
my little bear?

[baby grunting]

- Hey, kiddo, what's this?
- [door shuts]

Where-where did you get those?

So, I was gonna be
the last to know?

- Last to know what?
- Dad, dad, later.

I know, I read them all.
Every one.

You can't do that. That's-that's
an invasion of my privacy.

Oh, what do you mean? Come on.
They were all opened.

On my desk. In my room. Okay.

You're-you're ruining it. Okay?
I-I-I had a whole plan.

You had a plan for your mail?

NYU, Columbia University.

- Hunter College.
- S-stop it, stop it, okay?

I was gonna tell you. I was...

I was gonna tell both of you.

Tell me what? What's going on?

He applied to schools in New
York City and got into them all.

It's just not
how-how I wanted to tell her.

Hang on. You applied
to schools in New York?

To be close to me?

No. I mean, maybe.

Not exactly.
It was more of a coincidence.

A huge coincidence.

Also, yes. I did.

Al, I, I haven't
even gotten in yet.

I know, I know but we both know
that you will.

- So...
- [Bert] So, what?

When were you gonna tell
your old man

about this big plan of yours?

- You're-you're not happy for me?
- You know...

Maybe I would be

if you didn't keep it a secret.

I thought we told each other
everything.

- That's a laugh.
- What are you talking about?

I don't know. Why don't,
why don't you tell me?

Is there, is there, is there
anything that you can think of

that you've been wanting to tell
me for the past, mm, 20 years?

- What is happening right now?
- [Bert] I don't know.

- Your boyfriend's going loco.
- Anything about...

About who my real dad is?

[Elaine] What?

What are you talking about?

So don't try talking about
secrets

with me.

I don't know
what's gotten into you, kiddo.

Dude, what is going on?

I found out when I-I did
the DNA for the bogman.

He's been lying to me
my whole life.

Can you believe it?

- I... Well...
- Well, what?

I don't know, I mean,

he was probably just worried
about your reaction.

You know, like, maybe you
wouldn't feel the same way

about him
if you knew the whole truth.

[clears throat] Or like
it would disappoint you.

Elaine,
lying to me is way worse

than-than anything
he could have told me.

Yes.

Yeah, totally. I get that.

He creeped out that I applied

to a bunch of schools
in New York.

[instrumental music]

Did we find a loophole
in the contract?

No, the best idea pitched so far
is Geneva faking her own death,

so we can use the life insurance
to buy out the Norwegians.

Insurance fraud.
That's easy to do.

Greg, please don't say anymore.

Can I ask you two
for, um, some advice?

Tell us. What is it?

I know everyone is very upset
about the salmon farm,

but it's also Sarah's birthday
on Sunday.

And I wanted to throw her
a surprise party

at the Legion Hall.
Is that in poor taste?

- No, don't postpone joy.
- They can take our bay.

But they can't take our spirit.

I'll make
her favorite mac and cheese!

Really?
I-I-I will let everyone know.

- Okay.
- Oh.

[door shuts]

- [Sarah] Hey.
- Hey.

What are you
guys whispering about?

- Insurance fraud.
- Oh.

I told Geneva that's a bad idea.

George, you got my lunch
back there?

Yup.

You doing anything special
for your birthday?

- Sarah?
- [Sarah] Well...

Louisa thought maybe
bingo with the Legion Hall.

- But it's your birthday.
- Honey.

I've had enough birthdays.

All right.
A bingo birthday it is.

- Later.
- Yeah.

- Bye.
- Bye.

[indistinct chanting]

- Go, go, go!
- Okay, okay, okay.

Uh-uh! You fishy. Uh-uh.

F-I-S-H-Y.
All our salmon gonna die.

F-I-S-H-Y.
Sigrid, Ludwig, you both die.

You fishy. Uh-uh.
You fishy. Uh-uh.

You fishy.
Ooh, you so fishy. Ooh!

You're blocking our entrance.
You're disrupting our business!

- Now you're getting it.
- Yeah!

Now we're gonna have to call
Sheriff Mark.

- Get you all arrested.
- Wait, what? Run, run!

You can't call yourself
an activist

until you've been arrested!

Y'all want some hot chocolate?

Hey, Sheriff Mark, I need these

teens arrested immediately, they

are causing a public nuisance.

But I'm so proud of them. They
are doing really, really good.

Wait, where did everyone go?

[suspenseful music]

What are you doing here?

I noticed you went white
as a sheet during that delivery.

So I made some calls,
asked around.

Seems Elaine has been the one
taking blood for quite a while.

What? That's crazy!

I don't, I don't even know
what-what blood is.

[Glendon] That's why
you came here, isn't it?

You have a thing about blood.

You just can't handle it.

And now you have an employee

taking blood without a license.

Well, the Medical Board
won't like that.

Now people listen to you,
town doctor.

So let's make a deal.

You get them
to embrace the salmon farm,

and I won't end
your medical career.

[Elaine scoffs]

Think it over.

[whistling]

- [door opens]
- Dammit!

Thanks. Thank you.

Oh, God! Dr. Montgomery.

- Oh, hello.
- What are you doing here?

Well, I came to see Martin.
Then I thought I'd stay here.

- It got five stars on Yelp.
- Uh...

You came to see Martin. Uh, why?

To rekindle what we once had.

I think it's clear he wants to
pick up where we left off, so...

Yeah, clear.
Clear to both of you.

Did he, did he, did he,
like, tell you that or...

Not outright.

- But I'm very intuitive.
- Mm.

Why else would he refer you
to me? He's interested.

- How perceptive.
- Mm-hmm. Well...

While I have you here,
I would love

to continue our
earlier conversation.

Uh, did you get my test results?

Yes, you were
on my call list today.

- And?
- The blood test results...

They confirm that your LH levels
are very high.

So if you wanna
get pregnant, you need to do so

as soon as possible.

Oh, okay. Um, soon.

Like, uh, how soon? Like, like,
like now, like, now-now or...

Well, oh, yeah,
if there's anyone here

who is acceptable for you,

then that would be ideal, yes.

I'll do it.

- Oh.
- Oh.

[chuckles] I'm good.
But thanks, Clark.

Anytime. Just let me know.

I will.

You got some choices here.
Look at that.

Um, well,
thank you for the update.

- Mm.
- Oh, George. Greg.

[chuckles] Look, it's
an old girlfriend of Martin's,

who's my new fertility doctor,
that just told me

I'm almost barren,
and she's come to Port Wenn

to date Martin again, and she
would like to stay here.

- I'll get you a key.
- Room 4 is free.

Great. Do you have any rooms
without a view?

I find nature to be distracting.

And if you could book me
a massage at 5:30.

- Thank you. That's my bag.
- That's her bag.

- Yeah.
- She's incredible. Call me.

Yeah.

[instrumental music]

How can I have been
so unprofessional?

Doc, you did the best you could.

No. I got sloppy. First
you were just helping me.

Then I let you do
all the blood draws yourself.

I've become like
everyone else here.

Not following the rules.
Not thinking it through.

Just assuming
everything's gonna be okay.

And now I can lose
my medical license.

[door shuts]

Wait, am I gonna go to jail?

Doc!

Doc!

Are we going to jail?

- Say Jane Fonda.
- Who's Jane Fonda?

Oh, my God. You don't know
who Jane Fonda is?

- No, I don't know who Jane Fo-
- Uh, shut up! Shut up!

- Smile!
- Who is that?

- Oh, my God.
- Yeah, so Jane Fonda.

[Louisa] Ah. Hey, you guys.
Glad you called.

We didn't have a choice.
We couldn't call our parents.

Okay, thanks.
Uh, w-what happened?

Greg and George called it in.
Trespassing.

- And a public nuisance.
- Yeah!

- Double illegal!
- Double illegal!

Double illegal! Let's go!
So hard!

Okay, how much to bail them out?

- Uh, 30 bucks.
- Each?

- Nah. Total. First offense.
- Oh, fine.

[chuckles]

Do you guys wanna take a photo

with us before we go?

- [gasps]
- Uh, do we?

- [indistinct chatter]
- Amazing.

- Everybody look gashed here.
- Right.

Okay, everybody
say Lily Tomlin.

[all] Lily Tomlin!

- [laughing]
- [indistinct chatter]

[laughing]

It's a shame you guys didn't
work out, you would've been

such cool parents.

Okay, someone
grab the head for me.

- Yeah, I got it.
- The one with the eyes.

[boy] Let's go protest
something else.

[instrumental music]

[instrumental music]

[Martin] Eden. Hello.

This is a surprise.

- Is it though, really?
- Um, actually, yes.

When you called saying
you were in town, I wasn't sure.

I took the liberty of
ordering you a sparkling cider.

Non-alcoholic, of course.
Is that what you still like?

Um, yes, thank you.

See, some things never change.

- Eden, why are you here?
- To date you.

Court, couple, liaise with.

We were so young when we dated.

And now we're older,
and I've seen what's out there,

and you've seen
what's out there.

And I'm sure we can both say
with the utmost confidence

that we are the optimal choice
for each other.

Right.

You always were

confident and practical.

Okay, let me phrase this
in a more romantic way.

Let's seize this opportunity
for a second chance at love.

I took a few personal days
so we can begin.

- To us.
- Uh...

Mm? One thing.
One-one quick thing.

Um, you're not interested
in that school teacher

that you sent to see me,
are you?

- What? No. Mn-mn. Mn-mn.
- Yeah. No, I thought so.

She's very nice, but I don't
see you as compatible.

- Oh, you're right. We're not.
- Hm.

I imagine that it's amusing.
you know, the quaint customs,

the charming
quirky little characters.

- Mm.
- Mm, to-to live.

Well, they needed a doctor,
and I needed a change.

Speaking of which,

I have a patient
I was hoping you could...

Oh, you've always been
so dedicated to your work.

I find that very attractive.

Really? Thank you.
I... Thank you.

Most people find it off-putting.

No, I love it. I love it.

- Oh.
- Tell me more.

Well, the patient's name
is Sigrid.

Well, she recently gave birth.

She has headaches,
elevated blood pressure,

but not high enough
for preeclampsia.

And I noticed

that she smells kind of off.

Hm. Musty smell or rotten eggs?

Rotten eggs,
which leads me to believe-

Possible infection.
She needs to be examined.

She's finally agreed
to see me tomorrow.

Here's the other odd thing.

The baby's hairy.

And not just hairy.

- Extremely hairy.
- Okay. Well, that could be...

- Hormonal imbalance. Yes.
- Hormonal imbalance. Right.

- And I heard it grunt.
- Grunt?

- Yes.
- What kind of grunt?

I need to know specifically what
kind of

grunt it was.
Just if you can... Just...

- You know, mm-bb...
- Okay.

Newborn's grunting
while breathing

can be a pre-sepsis indicator.

And that can be very dangerous
for the baby.

So you're saying the mother
and the newborn could both

have sepsis. I mean, they
should be brought to ER-

- Yeah. Where are they right now?
- Well...

They're at a, um, presentation

at the Legion Hall starting now.

- Okay, let's go.
- [soft music]

Well...

Oh, could you see my luggage
while I'm gone?

- [Sigrid] We, your sister cit...
- She's the one.

Only want the best
for both of us.

Once the happy salmon house
is constructed,

each month will bring
a wonderful dividend check

to be paid to every family
in Port Wenn.

[groans] I...

She looks
like she's having stomach pains.

Yes. Infection
would lead to that.

Of course,
nothing is more important

than keeping our oceans safe.

What's going on?

You delivered
a full placenta, yes?

- Yes, but...
- [gasps]

[singing in Norwegian]

- What? Again?
- [singing in Norwegian]

Wait, I'm having, like,
the craziest deja vu right now.

[singing in Norwegian]

Diamniotic dichorionic twins.

[singing in Norwegian]

- [groans]
- [water breaking]

[all gasping]

Is there another hairball
in there?

[screaming]

[speaking in Norwegian]

- [Sigrid groaning]
- Okay, someone call 911.

- I'll do it.
- I'll-I'll get coats again.

- I'll get towels again.
- This is crazy.

I feel like I'm trapped
in some weird space-time

back-to-the-future continuum.

Am I really here?
Is this really happening?

Mark, I need you to pour hot
water over a pair of scissors.

- And bring it back to me.
- Great Scott!

- Martin, can I help?
- I'm gonna need you...

To deliver this baby right now.

No, we are. I've got you.

I have been begging to employ

contraceptives since baby
number two. Now look at this.

- Practically a football team.
- Ludvig, focus.

[Louisa] I can't believe this,
I might not even be able to have

one kid and she's popping 'em
out like a PEZ dispenser.

You want one? Please, take.

I need to take care
of my Viking queen.

- Oh, okay.
- Okay, we are crowning.

Ah! How can a second fetus
go unnoticed?

But if one is right behind
the other, it can make it

difficult to see the second
or even detect his heartbeat.

Okay, Sigrid, big push.

[screaming]

- [baby bawling]
- Congratulations.

You have a beautiful baby girl.

- Aw...
- Will you look at that?

- Aw... Oh, oh.
- Wow.

- Huh, that's surprising.
- Yeah.

- She's a cute one.
- Well, she's not hairy.

I was really looking forward
to call her a Two-Bacca.

Two placentas, unequal function.

Hey, one was producing
excess androgens,

which explains
little Halvdan's body hair.

You always were
the smartest one in the room.

- My God, she's burning up!
- [Martin] Okay.

[man] Hey, the paramedics
are here. Move out of the way.

- Everybody.
- We got a 35-year-old female.

- Intrauterine infection.
- [Eden] Could be septic.

Okay, she needs fluids
and IV antibiotics.

And the babies
need a full workout.

- Got it, doc.
- One, two, three.

Don't worry, little one,
everyone's gonna be okay.

- Thank you, doctor.
- Uh, it's fine. You're welcome.

Please, understand.

This changes nothing.

The salmon farm
will still come to Port Wenn.

- [woman gasping]
- Unbelievable.

Man, I've run into some hard
cases, but she is stone-cold.

If you weren't on that gurney,
I would punch you in the face!

Poor woman, the first thing I'm
going to do is buy your house,

kick you out, and tear it down.

- [all gasping]
- She's obviously delirious.

- She doesn't mean it.
- Listen to me.

I just delivered
two of your twelve children,

or however many you have, not
to mention saving Sigrid's life.

But these are your duties, yes?

But not theirs.

Mn-mn.

And yet they helped you
every step of the way.

Even after they knew that you

and your
definitely-sociopathic wife

came here under false pretenses
to destroy their town,

they helped. Why?

[instrumental music]

Because they're good

and they're decent to the core.

So they might not
have the stomach

for a prolonged
ugly court battle.

Nor the resources, I'm guessing.

Yeah, but the thing is,
Ludvig...

I am not as nice as they are.

And you know who loves me?

A certain powerful US senator

on whom I performed
a very successful triple bypass

says he owes me his life.
So you have a choice.

You could tear
up that dishonest contract

you tricked these people into,
or I will make sure

you never do business
in America again.

It's up to you.

I thought you said
medicine never takes sides.

This isn't medicine.

This is Port Wenn.

- Fine! You win!
- Ah!

Consider the contract
null and void.

[cheering, applauding]

Now if you'll excuse me,
I must go. My queen needs me.

Ludvig, wait, wait.
We can fix this.

You're gonna be sorry, Eeyore.
Trust me.

- Okay?
- Yes. Yes.

- Hey. That was cool, doc.
- Yay!

[chuckles]

What was, uh, that all about?

Um, like most things
in this town...

- It's kind of hard to explain.
- Hm.

Anyway, uh, we made
a great team today, I feel.

We did. We did.

So maybe I could see you later

and we could pick up
where we left off?

- Uh-huh. Yeah, mm. Mm-hmm.
- [chuckles] Okay.

[door opens]

Martin.

Martin, wait.
You saved the town.

I... I wouldn't say that.

All this time,
a-a-a certain senator, I mean,

why didn't you
say something sooner?

Because I just made him up
right now.

[instrumental music]

Dr. Martin Best,
you never cease to surprise me.

[Louisa] Thank you.
[Martin] You're welcome.

[Louisa laughs]

So how many
can I set aside for ya?

- [Barry] A couple. Yeah.
- Two? Two's good?

All right, you got it.

Come on out of there.

All right, easy.

Good ones, huh?

[suspenseful music]

Hey, Barry,
I gotta go back on the boat.

If you could just keep an eye
on that and, uh,

well, keep that lid on,
and don't let 'em get away.

- [Barry] Okay.
- Yeah.

[engine revving]

[clacking]

So you're going with
the quotation marks

around the bingo?

Because when you put
the quotation marks

around the bingo, it looks like

it's not really bingo.

What do you want, dad?

You tell me, when's
the best time to tell your kid

that he's not your kid?

When he's five and you're
together playing Legos?

"Hey there, little buddy,
not your real dad."

Or when he's 12, you know,

"Hey, can you pass the pancakes
to not-your-actual father?"

I don't know, dad, but-but-but
you were the grown-up.

You were supposed
to figure that out.

Yeah. Well, point taken.

- Who's my real dad?
- I'm your real dad, damn it.

You know what I mean.

I don't know...

because she never told me.

[sighs]
Can you forgive me, kiddo?

This isn't me realizing, like,
there's no tooth fairy, dad.

This is a-a lie about who I am.

I don't know, you're sure
you wanna play bingo

on your birthday?

If they let me win!

She's kind of dressed up.
Do you think she knows?

Oh, she never wears silk. Damn
it! I wanted this to be a...

Surprise!

[instrumental music]

[cheering, applauding]

The only thing
better than a surprise party

is a surprise wedding.

[cheering]

Here, here, give me your coats.
Go, have a seat.

Did you really think
that you were gonna get away

with getting married without us?

[cheering]

- Now...
- Yeah.

[Sarah] Everybody's here
and all dressed up.

We don't have Brisket.

Wait.

See, we have taken care
of everything.

[Sarah laughs]
Thank you, Martin.

[indistinct chatter]

[laughing]

We don't have rings.

I told you
we've taken care of everything.

Okay, Peter. Oh, there you are.

And now
we shall begin the ceremony

of the warming of the rings.

And as the rings
get passed to you,

please take a moment
to hold them in your hand,

and think of a silent blessing
for our dear friends

and their future together.

[instrumental music]

George and Greg,

you came here to Port Wenn
18 years ago.

Bought that broken-down
old bed and breakfast

and turned it
into the Salty Breeze,

which is the very heart

and soul of our little town.

And for 18 years you have fed us

and, and celebrated with us.

And most importantly,

you have gossiped with us.

[laughter]

And there are no two people
in this town

who are cherished more
than the two of you.

The rings now contain something

much more precious
than the metal

because they hold
the collective love

and blessings
of everyone here...

because we love you so much.

Yeah. Love you guys.

And, uh, it fits.

[chuckles]

This is...

so perfect.

[instrumental music]

- Thank you.
- [laughter]

Now you may kiss the groom,
both of ya.

[laughter]

[cheering, applauding]

? Funky sounds wall to wall ?

? We're bumpin' booties
having us a ball y'all ?

? Shake your groove thing
shake your groove thing ?

? Yeah yeah ?

? Show 'em how we do it now ?

? Shake your groove thing
shake your groove thing ?

Look at you. You're glowing.

Mm. And why wouldn't I be?

We beat those damn Norwegians.
Love is in the air.

- Future looks bright.
- It does?

Even though
you still might lose your house?

[chuckles] Things can turn
on a dime, Marty.

They can turn on a dime.

? Rhythm tonight ?

? All the rest know
we're the best ?

? Our shadows
crash in the light ?

If you love her so much,
why don't you tell her?

Could it be worse
than wondering what if?

[whining]

[chuckles]
I'm gonna go get some cake.

? Oh hold me tight
spin me like a top ?

? Shake your groove thing
shake your groove thing ?

? Yeah yeah show 'em how we ?

Hey, um, I was thinking,

what if I came with you
to your call-back to you.

Come on, we could,
we could ride the subway,

we could eat pizza till we barf.

We could take pictures
with the Naked Cowboy.

What do you think?

What?

[sighs] Oh.

? Let's keep dancing ?

Sorry to cut...
Please, just one sec.

- [microphone feedback]
- Hi. Sorry to, uh, interrupt.

I just, um, I just wanted to...

Uh, I just want you to know
that, um, I'm actually

not going to New York
to audition for Juilliard.

- Oh!
- Why?

Um, because I didn't even get
a call-back.

I've been lying this whole time.

- What?
- Yeah.

They rejected me last week.

But I-I just, I saw
how excited for me you all were.

So, yeah, I'm, I'm sorry
to, to lie,

and I'm, I'm sorry
to disappoint you

and I'm-I'm sorry

that I wasn't good enough.
Sorry.

- Oh, no, no.
- No, you did not disappoint us.

With all the lying,
why, why wouldn't you tell me?

Because you like me,
because you, like, think

that I can do anything.
And clearly I can't.

Elaine, I love you.

I love you because you're you.

Hey, that's my boy.

And I, I don't think
that you can do everything.

You almost burnt down the office
trying to make toast.

- Twice.
- She did?

- You love me?
- Yeah.

[instrumental music]

[all] Aw...

He's not the only one
that loves you.

- Oh!
- Yes!

[cheering, applauding]

- [cheering]
- [upbeat music]

It's a great day, isn't it?

- I guess.
- Well, what's the matter?

I mean, it's all
too up in the air.

Well, Al is upset with me.

Is he gonna go to New York
without Elaine?

You know,
can we even really afford it?

I hate to admit it,
but I, I really

could have used
that monthly Norwegian money.

Well, you don't have to worry
about that.

Why not?

- You know what I saw fishin'?
- What?

Sea urchins for miles.

- No. You mean...
- We're gonna be rich!

- [laughing] Oh! Oh.
- All of us! All of us!

- [laughing]
- Okay, okay.

- Uh, uh, wait, just... Okay.
- Have some cake.

[instrumental music]

? Magic of a woman ?

? With you by my side ?

[laughter]

[indistinct chatter]

? And just wait
all over my life ?

? If you're gonna love
anyone above me ?

? Babe it better be me ?

? Magic in the moonlight ?

[indistinct singing]

? Whenever you are inside ?

? If you're gonna love anyone
above me ?

? It better be me ?

? Oh let's go dancing ?

[Louisa] Pretty amazing, huh?

We managed to get George to cook

for his own wedding. Boom.

Um...

Do you wanna have a baby
with me?

- What?
- As friends.

That's what we were always
the best as anyways,

being a great team.

I don't understand.

Yeah. Yeah.

Like, we would, um...

We would parent together,
but not be together?

Yeah. Yeah.

It's a new world, you know?

Families are made
all different ways now.

Why not?
Let's have a baby together.

Really?

Yeah.

[Geneva] Oh. Oh, Martin.

Oh, Martin. Oh, I hate
to have to tell you this.

Oh, after such a nice day and...

- All that you've done for us.
- What is it?

Well, as secretary
of the Town Council,

I just got an email

from the Maine
State Medical Registry.

They're gonna investigate you.

Something about Elaine
taking blood without a license.

[somber music]

[sighs]

[keys jingling]

[knocking on door]

[quirky music]

I knew you'd call.

[door shuts]

[suspenseful music]

[growling]

[theme music]

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