Original subtitles

Never! Don't tell me these things.

Viscount, I love you.

I love you to death. Look at how much I love you.

Look, I'll give you proof of it.

The proof is this cake.

Damn! It's good!

Angela, granted that your boyfriend is the director,

but he replaces the actors only in the scenes where they eat!

See? It's not poisoned.

This is proof of our love.

And now, Viscount, I will be yours, my whole life.

Take me, possess me.

Hold me, hey!

- Yes, kiss me! - What the hell? This is a tryout!

You get carried away. Angela, did you understand what you should do?

Come on! Try it! Come.

Lillino! You can't expect me to do such erotic scenes.

I'm not as big an actress as you think.

But you are very big! And I'll be a big director.

Come up now and be a slut. Come on! Try it.

Angela! Come on! Go!

Countess Amalia, you are ruining everything! We're doing tryouts.

Forget tryouts! The first race is about to begin. Come on, Angela!

Why must we ruin something as serious as the theater?

After our debut in Bologna,

we can do a debut at the Metropolitan of New York.

Theater means racing, not going to a race.

Anyway, I won't move from here!

Meanwhile, we're going to eat.

Ok, I'll move from here!

- Hi, Giorgia! - Hi. Finally school is over.

- Are you glad? - Yes. Hi, Auntie.

- Hi. - She always has me be a chauffeur.

What are you saying?

Let's hurry! The races are starting.

Finally I can get rid of this uniform. I can't stand it anymore.

- Countess, what'll you have today? - It doesn't matter.

The second race is about to start. Hurry! Bring some "fettuccine".

- Make it quick. - Right away!

Dear, how are you?

- Fine. - You look magnificent!

We were doing tryouts for "The Virgin and the Viscount". Lillino directs.

What a good-looker!

- The day after tomorrow? - Alright!

See you.

He looks like Lillino.

- Alright. Bye. - Bye.

Good-day, Countess.

- How are you? - Anselmo Bresci!

- You're racing now, right? - Yes. Today is my race.

- The gentlemen's race! - Bravo!

- Best wishes. - Thank you, Countess. Excuse me.

I wonder if Lillino will eat today since he's alone.

Cuckoo! Here I am! Hi, my love.

- Come! Come! - Good-day, Countess.

Lillino! I was sure you'd come. Hi, Giorgia.

Come, come.

- Are you eating with us? - No, thanks. I'm not hungry.

The cake I ate is still stuck here.

I get easily nervous.

We can't interrupt tryouts like that.

You never leave her in peace, Countess.

No, thanks. I'm on a diet. This morning I thought a lot...

and had a fantastic idea. A theater adaptation

of "Count Ugolino".

The man who eats his daughter's head, right?

I will be Ugolino, and you will be Beatrice.

- You'd like that? Happy? - Thank you!

I'll serve, thank you. You want some?

I enjoy it. I've always liked serving other people's plates.

- Even when I'm not hungry. - Just a few for me, thanks.

- Giorgia! - Yes, Auntie?

Hurry! Go place 50,000 on Cicciobello.

- Alright. - Right now! Right now!

- Cicciobello is a lovely horse. - Magnificent!

- Magnificent! - The "tagliatelle" are lovely, too.

Excuse me. What's the name of the horse

Mr. Anselmo Bresci is racing with?

Bresci... Pelosetto, number 3.

Alright. 50,000 on 3 as a winner.

- Here. - Thank you.

Second race. Cesena prize. Two million.

After 50 meters, the horses are all grouped together.

Bengasi continues leading the group.

Radames is at his side.

Pelosetto moves away from the others,

and is impatiently pawing in the middle of the track.

Prolonged canter. Pelosetto is disqualified.

Cicciobello recuperates.

They're reaching the finish line. Radames and Cicciobello neck to neck.

Cicciobello wins!

I knew it! I knew it!

- That Cicciobello is some horse! - She's so happy!

No one believed it! They'll pay me 20 times as much!

See what your auntie did, Giorgia?

- See, Giorgia? - Auntie, actually...

- I didn't bet on Cicciobello. - What?

What? You didn't bet on...

No, I bet on Pelosetto.

The girl bet on Anselmo Bresci's horse?

Not on Cicciobello?

She made a mistake, Auntie. She's no expert.

I'm sorry.

What do you care? Auntie is laughing. She's in a good mood.

Who cares about Cicciobello.

What matters is good health!

Hey! What happened? She's dead.

So, ladies,

just to be clear, no money.

Your poor aunt left debts, most of all.

But then, her gambling vice was well known.

- Poor Auntie! - Right.

You have a property left, however.

A villa at Colleverde.

- Just outside the city. - A villa?

Yes, ladies.

But you'd better not get your hopes up.

The countess had tried many times to sell it,

but the property is in a terrible state.

- Yes, in fact... - It doesn't look too great.

What can I say, dear ladies?

The villa is what you see.

Watch out, Giorgia!

Alright. It was my duty to accompany you.

There are other salons here.

Come, I'll lead the way.

It's huge!

What'll we do here?

It's like...

It's like a monastery, like abandoned military quarters.

It's like...

A guest house.

A guest house!

A guest house!

Right, Angela! A guest house!

Right!

Good morning. You're eating a sandwich, huh?

Are you painting?

We're cleaning it up.

- You have a bottle opener? - No. Use the hammer there.

Hey! Where's my bread?

I ate it all, and didn't notice.

Radames, I'm coming!

Oh, no!

Angela, please, go back to bed.

Who is Angela?

I am Aida.

I must go to Radames.

Alright, you're Aida.

But go back to bed, and don't be obnoxious as usual.

Come on! Come on!

That's it! Come.

Get undressed!

This goes off!

- Tell me I'm a whore! - Yes! Yes!

- You're a big whore! - But not here!

Where're you going? Come here!

- Excuse me. Mr. Bresci? - What?

- Mr. Bresci! - Oh!

- He's in the office. I'll call him. - Yes, thank you.

- Is he writing? - No, he's doing accounting.

Darn it! Who is it?

- That lady is here for you. - Oh! It's you, Giorgia!

Good-day, Mr. Anselmo. I brought this drawing.

We'd like advertising brochures for our guest house.

Alright. Give it to me. I'll take care of it. Bye.

As for the price, if you could help us out...

Also because it's your fault too, if Auntie died.

- Cicciobello! - Yes, Cicciobello!

Don't worry. We'll reach an agreement on the price.

Bye.

They'll be ready this evening.

Beautiful!

A doctor, please! He fell and hit himself right there.

Arriving on track 2 is the local train

coming from Ferrara and Ravenna, continuing to Bellaria and Rimini.

- For you. - You're giving the dog a brochure?

If there's a dog, there must be his master, huh?

Master! Master!

- Master! - Here I am. Did he do something?

I had him sit here so the suitcase won't be stolen.

Is he an anti-mugging dog?

No, he's an anti-drugs dog. But he's a bit dazed out now.

He's been sniffing drugs so much that he's stoned.

- Did you just arrive? - Yes, I come from Naples.

I came to Bologna because there's a very good Swiss vet.

Are you looking for a hotel?

Yes, at least for a week. I have to detox Gennarino.

Why don't you come to our place, Paradise Guest House.

Our guests have good references.

May I? Marshal Pasquale Esposito, Anti-Narcotics Center.

Having a Carabiniere at home makes us feel safe!

Of course! What is the complete accommodation price?

- 50,000 all-included. - A month?

- A day! - Oh! A day.

It's too much! I can't spend that. I'm on a transfer.

What will Gennarino and I do? Let's make it 5,000.

- A month? - A day.

No, no! At least 10,000.

- A day? - A week!

10,000 a week.

Gennarino, come here! Where are you going? You don't know Bologna!

There he is!

- Gennarino! - Gennarino, don't bark!

He's a "drugstore man", not a "drugged man".

I told you, he's dazed out. He received a silver medal,

but doesn't understand jack shit! Oh, excuse me.

Let's go, idiot!

- Attorney, how will this case go? - Just deny.

- I'm worried. My wife... - Deny what's obvious.

- Attorney, your briefcase! - Bye.

- I'll call you tomorrow. - Good-day, sir. How's it going?

- That case has been settled. - Thank you.

You can't insult people who don't give you a tip.

I'll give you 10,000 liras, so you won't tell me to fuck off!

- Otherwise... - I'm glad. Thank you, sir.

Bye, handsome! I'll open this little door and get into this little car.

These parking men have gone mad. It costs a fortune to park.

- Excuse me. I'm in the wrong car! - No, you excuse me.

- I couldn't go out like this. - Of course... I see that.

- I lost my dress. - Oh, right!

Poor girl!

Please take me home. I don't know what to do.

You want to go home? I was about to propose it.

I'd be glad to. It's a lovely day, isn't it?

- You should put the key inside. - Yes.

There. The engine started!

You're not from here? You don't live here?

I'm from Florence, but I work and live here in Bologna. Why?

You could've come to live with us.

- "Us", who? - My sister and I.

- We live alone. - Two sisters all by themselves?

We have a guest house.

Paradise Guest House in Colleverde, an area on the outskirts.

Oh! Outskirts... Do lots of guests go there?

Oh, no. Only people with a good reputation.

I have a good reputation and could come right away.

Excuse me if I ask, but what is the price?

- 50,000. - It's not very expensive!

- How long could I stay? - As long as you like.

We've a guest who's been there ten days!

Does the boy resist?

If I stayed a couple of days, would you always be at my disposal?

Of course! But remember, 50,000 a day.

I think it's a good price!

In fact, if you take care of me, are sweet with me,

I'll give you a nice present, too. Alright!

You bang, and I bang, even my uncle bangs here.

These are Tuscan songs. This big doll is really cute!

See, Angela? 100,000 liras for two days. Paid in advance.

I hope he doesn't complain about my cuisine.

I'm not a good cook.

Oh, no! He's a cheerful, pleasant man.

I'm Dad, you moron!

I'm at the airport, and must be in Zurich tonight.

Huh? Don't make me waste time. I'll miss my flight.

Yes, I must be in Zurich tonight.

The plane is leaving.

You're the little sister's big sister?

- Lots of ass, huh? - What did you say?

- May I make another phone call? - Please. What manners!

I'd like to talk to Professor Settebeni.

Yes. I'm Settebeni.

Who is it? Oh, it's you, Mandelli. How are you?

I don't understand what you said.

It's because I'm speaking from Zurich.

Right, "Bologna". These foreigners don't understand a thing.

Are you following up on my case?

Yes, don't worry...

You hear some interference? It happens.

You hear birds? I'm not in paradise!

I'm in Switzerland, dunce! Don't worry, I studied everything.

Alright. Do a good job. Bye.

Mandelli from Zurich. Don't know what he's doing there.

You chose great lawyers, idiot.

You'll see how the case on the wrong operation ends up.

They'll put you in jail!

Adele, please! You know nothing about surgery.

Don't worry. Everything will be fine.

Oh, yes? Want to substitute them with yours? For what they're worth!

I'd appreciate it, if you don't go

into the anatomic details that are distasteful.

- Here's your coffee. - Right!

- I put 3 teaspoons of sugar. - Thanks, dear.

- If it wasn't for you... - It's nothing, Auntie.

When the maid isn't here, I don't even have coffee.

Orazio, why didn't you bring coffee for me?

- You didn't ask. - I didn't ask?

- No. - Then I'll make it myself!

- Good idea. - Thanks, Auntie.

Cuckoo! Hi, my darling.

What a coincidence! Every time I come, you're setting the table.

You're always eating!

Come here! Come here, my sweetheart.

I'm sleeping here tonight, and we'll finally make love.

We've been making love for five years.

That's another sort of love, my little pigeon.

That's platonic love. I mean carnal love!

Now that your ball-buster aunt isn't here... may her soul rest in peace...

we can really go for it!

What? We must wait until after we're married,

after the wedding trip, and after the honeymoon.

- Yeah, after the silver anniversary! - Yes!

When you talk like that, you get on my nerves and I lose my appetite.

What the hell are you doing?

Come in.

- Finally! - Dinner is ready.

- Dinner? - Naturally.

50,000, everything included. Dinner, lunch, breakfast and...

This is bliss!

Alright, all inclusive! Come here, cutie!

- What? Are you crazy? - Not really!

Did you forget the 10,000 I gave you 2 hours ago?

It was 2 days as a guest paid in advance.

Oh! Guest house, lunch, dinner...

Oh, God, what an idiot! I can't wait to tell this one!

I'm really sorry.

I'm leaving. Really.

Leaving? Where are you going?

You told your wife you're in Zurich!

You can't go around! But it's useless to stay here!

I'm leaving. What a misunderstanding!

- Unbelievable! - No! No!

It's not a good idea to leave.

- What a jerk! - It's a misunderstanding.

Actually, I am a girl and you are a man...

If we get to know each other, become friends,

we can reach an agreement.

- Are you serious? - Sure. Of course.

- Listen... - My big hotsie!

Sir, this is a guest house,

and I'm sure you'll enjoy your stay.

- Long live Italy! - With pleasant people.

You'll enjoy your stay. I am sure.

There's also my sister who...

- Call me Armando. - Yes, Armando.

Oh, my gosh!

- Come in. - What's going on?

- What is it, Marshal? - Gennarino is ill because of drugs.

Ever since he stopped sniffing it, he isn't well.

He'll get over it, don't worry. You have an aspirin?

- You'll give the dog an aspirin? - Yes, with some coca cola.

- Ok. Let's go in the kitchen. - Let's go with Auntie.

Aspirin and coca cola. Homemade drug! Let's go, Gennaro.

Love, come, come!

Like in American movies!

Bye. See you tomorrow. Give me a kiss.

Yes, but not a French kiss.

- Otherwise, it's a sin. - It's not a sin!

If it isn't a French kiss, it's like rice without peas,

like a pear without cheese. Chopin, third act.

It's late. Bye. See you tomorrow after tryouts.

Lillino! What about a kiss?

Without the tongue.

Bye.

- Bye. - Bye.

Giorgia! Giorgia!

- Did you miss your flight? - Yes.

- You're a guest, too? - Yes. Marshal Pasquale Esposito.

- At ease. - Marshal, huh?

Yes, Carabinieri marshal.

- But no one knows. - That you're a marshal?

- No, that I'm here. - Oh! I understand.

- Attorney Mandelli. No one knows. - That you're an attorney?

No, that I'm here. Better not to say anything.

- Agreed? - Yes, yes.

I was in the War in Africa, dear Mr. Mandelli. As a telegraphist.

It's a miracle if I'm here.

I was already dead on the Dire Dawa mountain.

- Just think! - Yes.

I got sunstroke here.

In the middle of my head.

As a telegraphist, I was receiving an important message

from Rome. Are you listening? - Yes.

- Otherwise, my head spins. - Yes, yes.

I was transcribing a message that said:

"Retreat. You'll never make it. It's useless to waste time."

I left the tent with the telegram, but got sunstroke and collapsed.

Attorney, I'm over here!

- Yes, alright. - Look at my face.

An officer came on a white horse. A handsome man with a moustache.

He got off his horse and kissed my mouth.

As in an enchantment, I woke up.

These things happen in wars.

One is away from the family, and the flesh is weak!

Weak flesh? It's not about gays!

A kiss on the mouth, artificial respiration.

So I woke up.

Gennarino!

- He had a diarrhea attack... - Yes, go ahead!

Gennarino, come to Dad!

- Antonio! - No!

- Antonio! - Did you see your sister?

- Antonio! - Antonio? No! No!

Don't touch me with those hands! Cleopatra, don't do it!

Think it over, because I...

- It's our night of love! - Actually I'm busy... No!

- Up to the last breath. - Come on! Wake up!

Calm down. What is it?

No! No! Stop! Stop!

- Please! - Take me!

- Take me! I am yours! - Watch out for my shirt! It'll rip.

Stop!

Antonio, you're trembling with passion.

My name is Armando, not Antonio.

No! You are Antonio!

Antonio! Antonio!

You're slapping me? Don't do that!

Mr. Anselmo!

Mr. Anselmo!

Who is it? Where?

Mr. Anselmo, just yesterday

I said to my sister, "Let's invite Mr. Bresci to our home."

How kind of you! Here are the other brochures. Go now. Bye.

- So what'll you do? - I'll come see you some evening,

and we'll have a lovely time. Bye, bye. Bye.

What is it, Rosaria? You're dressed!

- Bye. My husband checks up on me. - We didn’t manage

this time either! - We're unfortunate!

Rosaria! Come here...

- Destiny is against us. - Know where I'd stick destiny?

Bye. See you soon.

Damn it!

Could you distribute some of these brochures, please?

- Of course! - Thank you. Goodbye.

What are you looking for? There's nothing here, Judge.

Ever since you're in town, not even "Mickey Mouse" arrives.

They fear you'll have it confiscated because Minnie is wearing undies!

I'll decide if there is nothing here!

And don't you dare make wise remarks!

You should thank me! Or you want your children to become degenerate?

Degenerate? If we go on like this, we'll all become fags!

- Would you do me a favor? - Sure! Such a doll like you...

Could you distribute these? A guest house belonging to my sister and me.

- Two sisters? Where is it? - On the hill.

- Towards San Luca. - Alright!

- I'll do publicity for you. - Do a lot of it.

- Gladly. - Thanks. Goodbye.

Judge! You don't want to confiscate these, too, do you?

"Paradise Guest House."

"Home of the two sisters."

"All comforts. Modest prices."

"Run by the Mainardi sisters."

- Typical... - Of what?

Typical cover-up for a sordid prostitution activity.

Well... goodbye.

Go on, Judge. Better degenerate than faggots.

De Petris!

You know I can't stand that crime findings be touched!

I was checking. How disgusting, Judge!

They didn't know they'd be dealing with Judge Damiani. So...

I've the list of what's to be confiscated today.

- Good! - Take note.

- Three magazines. - Three magazines.

- A film. - A film.

- A brand of jeans ad. - A brand of jeans ad.

- And that of the Venice casino. - The Venice casino?

It appears more like a "petting house" rather than a betting house.

De Pretis, wake up! You look like you're out of it!

No, I'm not!

Masturbate! Do something!

Giorgia, why should I leave you here on the road?

I must find other guests, and now I know how.

How stupid of me not to have thought of it before!

- Thought of what? - Men think they'll find something,

and we must lead them to believe they'll find it.

It's too difficult for me. I don't understand.

Go on not understanding. What matters is that I understand.

How are you getting back to the guest house?

Don't worry. I'll get by on my own.

I can't. I'm in a hurry!

Do you need a ride, miss?

- No, thanks. - I'm going to Bologna.

I've changed my mind. I'm going to Campobasso.

Vincenzo, stop.

I see a lady asking for a ride.

So they stole your scooter, huh?

They had another intent, too, but I was able to defend myself.

It's so true that crime life is increasing.

I'd propose a law for...

- Are you from Bologna? - No.

Are you staying long in Bologna?

Three or four days.

I imagine you reserved a hotel.

I think the Party administration took care of it.

- Too bad! - Why?

- You could've come to our place! - Whose place?

Our villa.

"Paradise Guest House. Home of the two sisters. Modest prices."

I could think about it, and maybe see if...

I don't know...

I could... perhaps come for tea.

I'll gladly offer you one!

Now that you know the way, keep your promise.

Vincenzo, go pick one of those lovely roses

that I saw on the wall, passing by.

- What did you say? - Reserve a room for tonight.

Thank you, Vincenzo.

We must always keep potential voters happy.

- You're as lovely as a rose! - Thank you.

Settebeni, you must not worry. Don't be influenced by your wife.

Did you hear that? There's an interference.

Tomorrow morning I'll be there. Yes, Judge Damiani.

What? It's nothing!

Miss, please. I'm talking with Italy!

Besides, it must be proven!

Sure! He just needs to pull down his pants,

and you can see there's nothing inside!

I know I cut them. A very rare case.

We have to go all the way back to Abelard.

He had a low appendix, and I cut off his balls.

Let's call them that.

Not very scientific, but precise.

Alright, but it's very questionable.

"Homo est homus sine testiculorum".

I'm arriving on a flight tomorrow. I suggest you don't call Damiani.

You want to call him? I'll give you the number. Do as you wish.

Alright. My address book is in my jacket. I'll get it.

Don't be nervous! Wait...

Hello? Hello?

- Who's talking? - Who is this? Is this Zurich?

Zurich? This is Bologna, Paradise Guest House!

If you want to play a joke, call another number!

Paradise Guest House... That rascal, attorney Mandelli!

Each time he cuts someone's balls, he busts mine, too!

Yeah, sure! He hung up!

- So! What are we cutting today? - Nothing! Nothing!

This is the modification in the town plan,

already discussed at the assembly.

- Alright. - You can sign.

This is the modification for ex-retired people

already discussed at the assembly.

You can sign.

This is the modification for the new highway,

already discussed at the assembly.

You can sign.

Honorable Vincenzi, for the "Nation and Industry" dinner invitation...

I am very tired and want to go to bed.

- Good night. - Good evening. Excuse me.

My key, please. I don't want to be disturbed.

- You can sign. - Right.

Thank you.

- Where is Honorable Vincenzi going? - To screw!

We'll eat an excellent meal tonight!

It was very kind of you to cook!

Modestly speaking, this is my specialty.

- "Puttanesca" spaghetti. - Oh! What an ugly word!

What did I say? It's what the spaghetti is called.

We'll lick our chops, miss!

Tonight of all nights, when Lillino isn't here!

- Cuckoo! Here I am! - Lillino!

- I have to leave tomorrow. - We have just met.

I'll be back. But we could take a step forward tonight.

- Certainly, my attorney! - You're beautiful everywhere!

- Come to the table! - It smells wonderful!

This will be a magnificent evening!

- Give me the plates. - Me! Me!

- We're eating like popes here! - These were made with my heart.

Here.

- Cheers! - Give me your plate. You, later.

- Look here! - Nice and steaming!

I have mine.

Look here! There's Naples in here!

First the attorney.

Is it my turn now?

Wait, you come later. Let me serve.

How is it? Good?

How do you use your finger to say it's good?

- Here you are. - Marshal...

You come later. Just a moment. Be patient.

- This is my plate. - My plate is empty.

Yes, it's empty. Sorry, but not much is left for you.

It's what always happens. The last one pays penance.

Really delicious.

- That was my plate. - I made a mistake.

You always do! When it comes to eating, you go berserk.

- Holy Mary! He scared me! - What's in your pocket?

- 700 liras. - The other pocket? Cocaine? Drugs?

There's the script.

Let me see. Give it to me.

Oh! "The Opium Road". The dog is dazed out and...

- The dog? - Not me!

- Best wishes! - You weren't expecting it, huh?

- Me! Me! - Champagne!

- Give it to me. - To the marshal! Later.

- Give it to me! - To the marshal! All of it!

What're you doing? Cheers!

Let's do as the ancient Romanians and dive into a bacchanal!

- They did that in Romania? - I mean the Romanians from Rome!

- How does he speak? - Cheers!

- To our health! - How does they speak?

- The doorbell! - Who can it be?

Just a moment! Sit down! It could be some delinquent.

- You go, Marshal. - No, I'm not on duty.

Uh? You go, love. Sorry...

Go open and tell me if some delinquent is outside.

I'm a good person, but capable of busting their knees!

You won't do anything! It's crazy!

- Good evening! - Good evening. May I help you?

Yes. I want to see a blonde young lady who lives here.

Yes, my sister.

Why?

The kiss of life, mouth to mouth respiration.

If it wasn't for that valorous lieutenant, I wouldn't be here.

- What a loss! - Just a moment.

- For 2 years I stayed in Dire Dawa. - You strained for 2 years?

- What? - What did you strain over?

- I "stayed", not "strained"! - Oh, I see.

- It's a place in Africa! - Oh, I misunderstood!

- Don't be a bore! - Be quiet!

That man received the right payback in life.

He became an important politician.

Here she is!

Oh, what a pleasure! I didn't expect you so early.

Go, Angela. Mr. Vincenzi is our new guest..

I hardly recognized you dressed like this.

Remember, we politicians are public figures,

and must disguise ourselves a bit.

- I reserved a room for you. - Good, good.

- Wait a minute. I'll be right back. - Take your time.

Waiting stimulates the appetite.

Wow! Wow! Wow!

You joke, but if you'd seen the face of death as I did...

Dear attorney! The face of death...

Do you have a more cheerful story? Stop with that hand!

Should I tell the tale of Little Red Riding Hood?

- Oh! - What is it? Do you feel sick?

- What is it? - It's him! It's him!

It's him! The kiss on the mouth guy.

- Honorable Vincenzi! - Hey! Who are you?

- You don't recognize me? Dire Dawa. - Dire Dawa?

Dire Dawa, in Africa. Pasquale Esposito.

I remember! The young telegraphist whose life I saved.

Please, I'm here incognito. I don't want any scandals.

Remember? "Pasquale Esposito, jump into the fire!"

- And Pasquale jumped into the fire. - Be silent!

I'm here incognito, and don't want scandals.

Right. Look! This is the man who kissed me on the mouth!

Congratulations! I'll leave you two, so you can continue the relationship.

Fagg...

- Excellency... - Don't call me that.

- Honorable. - Don't call me that, either.

I am incognito. How else must I tell you?

Alright, Excellency, Honorable... whatever.

Remember that you can always count on me.

- I will never forget that kiss. - Alright!

Why are you dressed like this?

I came to meet an emissary of the CIA.

CIA! Drugs, narcotics!

I've Gennarino who is very good. He's a bit dazed out now,

and the vet doesn't know... - Your room is ready, Mr. Vincenzi.

I'll be right there. Excuse me.

- Remember to keep silent! - Yes. Honorable Vincenzi!

Dire Dawa.

He doesn't remember. How did he become a congressman?

- Please come in. - Yes. Close the door.

We haven't written the prices on the door yet.

It doesn't matter.

Here.

But you must do as I say.

What should I do?

Nothing. Absolutely nothing.

Just allow me to put some signatures on you.

- On me? - Yes, on you. On your skin.

You see... I sign many documents every day

that only serve to satisfy the greed of my many voters.

For me, signing has become a habit.

A professional deformation. I sign everything, miss.

My hand is always extended

in this gesture. Like this...

It is only with this gesture

that I reach pleasure. Understand?

Pleasure, lust.

It's a seizure that has overtaken me, which I can't control.

It seems so strange. I really don't understand,

but if it's what pleases you...

Do you like my felt pen?

- Yes, yes. - It's robust, you know?

- May I? - You can sign.

Do you like the way I sign?

- Yes, of course. - Now on your back!

May I?

You can sign.

I'll do another one now! May I?

Yes, you can sign.

Now on your breasts.

- May I? - You can sign.

Wow! How nice! May I?

- You can sign. - Now on your navel!

- Say, "Sign, rascal". - But, sir!

- Say, "Sign, rascal". - Sign, rascal!

You're tickling me!

Now your thighs!

Your legs are so lovely! They look like big felt pens.

Bigger than my phallic felt pen.

- May I? - You can sign.

- The other leg. May I? - You can sign.

Now your buttocks! Your buttocks! Your buttocks!

Your buttocks! Say, "Sign, pig"!

- What? - Say, "Sign, pig"!

Sign, pig!

Are you tired?

Yes, I'm tired...

but never satisfied!

If she enters, I, the Scandicci hammer...

- What a f... - Darling, where are you?

- Oh! You were hiding! - Yes, hiding.

I thought you wouldn't come.

- Sorry if I had you wait. - What did you do there, cutie?

- Nothing. A gentlemen signed here. - I see.

- Here, too. - Oh, here, too!

- And here. - Here, too!

- And here, too! - There, too?

- Yes? Rapid immersion! - And here...

And here.

Child, you had better wash up.

- You think? Alright. - Come, I'll wash you.

Yes. Come, and I'll wash you.

The rain falls on top of us.

It doesn't come off well with a sponge.

- The water is scalding! - How is it done?

With Marseille soap we'll wash the seashell.

- How is it done with soap? - Like this. A little here...

- Oh! Here, here and here! - Yes, there, too! It works.

- Above, too. - And this!

Yes! It's better there.

- Will you be staying long? - A week.

Two weeks. One week here, one there...

One here, one there. One here, one there.

You must sleep in the kitchen, and not in my room.

It's crazy with this cocaine addicted dog!

I knew this would happen!

I should've found another dog, you ugly ringworm beast!

I should've gotten another animal.

Holy Mary!

A cow in the house!

- A cow in the house! Holy Mary! - Oh, God!

Go on. I'll rinse off one last time.

- Marshal, was it you hollering? - I saw a cow in the guest house.

It was enormous, blonde, with two horns like this. A Swiss cow.

Are you drugged, like your dog?

I work at the Anti-Narcotics Center and take drugs? That was a cow!

- Alright, but let's go now. - Be careful.

What is going on?

Where did she go?

Siegfried!

Siegfried!

- Oh, God! Who is it? - Be quiet! Be quiet!

- Easy. - This is my room. Who is it?

- I'm attorney Mandelli. - You can't come to bed with me!

- Go away. - I'm afraid of the Valkyrie.

I choose who I want to sign! I don't like you. Go away.

You don't know who she is.

I'm not interested. Go away!

Go away! Go away!

What are you doing?

It's useless! People don't understand that I can't do

more than 12 signatures a day. I just can't!

- Child, what are you doing here? - Siegfried!

No! Not the butterball!

- I'm not Siegfried! - Don't lie!

- Go away! - You are Siegfried.

- My Siegfried! - No! No!

- No! No! No! - Take me! Love me, Siegfried!

- I'll bust you... - Take me!

Mandelli! I'm here!

Come, come. Look...

Look at how low a professional can stoop!

- Hi, Settebeni. - Come on! Get in!

You don't seem to be in the right state to drive a car.

- What're you doing here? - I got the urge

to visit Switzerland.

Settebeni, you know what? Don't bust my balls!

Please do not touch that topic.

You know it's very delicate for me.

- What if they convict me? - No, no.

Everything is alright.

Everything alright? Considering how well you studied my case

at the Paradise Guest House...

I'm not denying it, but...

I'd like to have seen you in my place!

Why? What goes on in there?

Dear Settebeni, you've no idea!

- Sodom and Gomorrah! - Really?

Try to imagine. Sodom and Gomorrah!

Hey! Watch out!

- So? Well? - Well... Well...

There's even more. They are two sisters.

- Two sisters who are alone. - Hey! Watch out!

- Excuse me. Excuse me. - Well? And so?

- Do you get the picture? - I sure do!

One of the two is more or less...

seventeen years old.

Excuse me. I had a moment of...

You risk going to jail with a 17 year old. Wake up!

Settebeni, better to go to jail for that,

than for having cut a patient's balls off.

- Stop it! - The judge is coming,

and he'll solve the matter in the best way possible.

- The judge! - Hey!

Yes, I remember well. It concerned that...

Good-day, Your Honor.

I'd like to say something, attorney. First of all...

Was he forced to undergo surgery? Was there constraint?

Not "constraint", but "castration"!

You'll talk when it's your turn. Sit down!

Please understand my client, Excellency.

He underwent a terrible impairment that left him

terribly deprived of the benefits of a healthy and normal virility.

That is to be proven, dear colleague. I wouldn't want that...

I imagine there is a medical record,

exams, expertise...

The best expertise I can present is the desperation

of this sweet bride, that was deprived of the joys of marriage.

A "sweet bride"? She looks like a jail warden dressed as a woman.

She lost her husband, and has become

a "white widow" who will never have the joy of a carnal encounter

with her husband.

Please avoid terms that are erotic and lascivious, attorney.

Put that on record. Does the defendant admit the offense?

No, Your Honor. I had to operate this man...

For appendicitis! It was to be an appendix operation.

You be silent! Sit down.

Yes, a normal appendectomy

that required a particular sort of intervention.

He cut his balls, Excellency!

Silence! Silence!

Who was it? Who was it?

One more word like that, ma'am, and I'll incriminate you!

Whoever says the word "balls" will be arrested.

Go on, Professor.

I found that it was necessary

to lighten the patient,

because there was a strange, anomalous connection

between his...

Between the genital apparatus and the part to be removed.

The truth is, you performed a wrong operation,

Professor Settebeni,

and must accept your responsibility.

You begin by proving the impotence of your client.

Isn't the testimony of this sweet bride,

who now only has the comfort of the Church and prayer, enough?

Sure, in company of the priest!

Silence! Silence!

What can I say, Excellency? It doesn’t get hard anymore!

- Ma'am! - It's like a weeping willow.

- Ma'am! - I didn't use any bad words!

What were you referring to with "weeping willow"?

His bird.

- She didn't beat around the bush! - Silence! Silence!

I'll kick you out!

I'll put you in an isolation cell. Silence!

The fact that he can't carry out his marital duties

can't be considered evident proof. Look at the lady with attention.

- Examine her, please. - What does that guy want?

Honestly ask yourselves... even if this may be difficult...

if in the place of this man, you could carry out marital duties.

- Oh, no! - The lady is ugly!

I didn't just try with her! You can't trick me!

I even tried with the milkman's daughter, who has

two tits and an ass... - Silence! I'll have you all leave!

Silence! Enough! Enough! Silence!

Silence! Silence!

Be quiet! Silence!

This sitting has been postponed.

- Thank you. Good-day, Excellency. - My compliments, Your Honor.

- With the milkman's daughter! - Hold still! Stop!

Shame on you!

See? She risked 20 years in jail. So she got lucky.

Aunt Adele, they told me everything is ok for Uncle Edoardo.

The judge updated the case, but what a high price to pay.

Just think. They all call him "ball-snatcher"!

I can't stand it anymore! How disgusting!

People only think about sex today.

It's true, Your Honor. Outlandish!

Look. Here!

"Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs".

You aren't confiscating this too? Snow White is just a girl

Her breasts are showing!

The dwarfs are so cute! So little, so little.

They're little but have big male genitals that...

If you make a relationship... Look.

- Over 24 centimeters! - It's true!

Shameful!

Come, come. Look.

"Sleeping Beauty".

Look. Prince Charming is waking her up.

- Hey! He's screwing her! - De Petris! How dare you!

Excuse me, Excellency, but at times sex overwhelms me.

You're right.

- Everything! Confiscate everything! - Certainly.

We can't afford to rest. We must keep working!

As far as I'm concerned, I work, and clean at night, too.

- Even at night, Excellency? - Even at night.

Morality is defended at all hours.

- Paradise Guest House. - Oh!

I'll check personally. I certainly won't fall for it!

The two girls are two "phallo-phories".

What's that mean?

De Petris, the word speaks for itself!

They are sinful women

who deal with phalli. - Oh!

- "Phallo-phorie" means "dick-phorie". - De Petris!

How dare you? I'll send you back to the Pontina swamp province.

I'll send you back to disinfest mice in the swamp you came from!

- At ease. - Thank you.

I'll be right back, dear. A great idea! I really needed a sweater.

- It's for Orazio. - I'm going to see the new clinic

which seems to be a good deal. - You're no good at making deals!

You're too distracted. You think one thing and do another.

It isn't true that I'm distracted!

It's not true? You cut that poor man's testicles!

That was a very rare case in surgery.

It'll be remembered in the archives of medical history.

- He had a problem... - You are too distracted!

Alright, dear. As you wish.

- Edoardo! - Yes, dear?

You forgot to put your pants on!

Oh, God! What's happening to me? It's all the worries.

My gosh! Who knows what you'll buy instead of a clinic!

Come on, don't make that face.

I'm more sorry than you are.

But what can I do?

Unfortunately...

I will be gone

until tomorrow.

Must you go, dear? You know I'm afraid of staying home alone.

My sweetheart, I must.

I'm doing it for everyone's sake.

- It’s a sort of crusade! - Nicola, you're such a good man!

You'll be made a saint.

Remember to lock up the house well.

- I'll call you tonight. - No!

What if one of those men who say dirty things on the phone calls?

It's true! Don't answer the phone.

Don't answer to anyone! See you tomorrow.

- Dear... - Bye.

Don't worry about me. Get some distraction. Bye.

My lily... Bye.

Hello? Is it you, Anselmo?

Yes, Rosaria. What is it?

Love! Tonight

we can finally satisfy our insane passion,

and drink the cup of sin till the end.

I'm already getting excited!

Fantastic! Are you serious? He'll be away all night?

Yes, a very peaceful place.

You're right. It could be very dangerous.

I know! Of course!

Don't worry. There won't be a soul around.

It's a guest house that just opened. They don't have any guests.

Don't worry. I'll call right away.

See you at the usual place. Ok? Bye, love. Bye. Bye. Bye.

- Alright. Imbecile! - What is it?

Nothing. Bresci called. He said he's sleeping here tonight.

Mr. Mandelli and the gentleman who came yesterday will be here, too.

- Aren't you glad? - Yes, but that imbecile

isn't coming by himself. - Great! Is he coming with a friend?

No. He reserved a double room!

Why are you angry? Why did you call him "imbecile"?

Forget it, Angela. You don't understand certain things.

You are too naive!

The marshal is at the vet's. We'll eat alone tonight.

- Cuckoo! Here I am. - Lillino!

Hi, beautiful. I'm not saying hi to you. I'm pissed off.

- What's with you? - What happened?

There's a rumor going around all of Emilia Romagna.

At the opening of "Hamlet" today, as I was saying,

"To be or not to be. That is the question."

Some guy yelled, "No question. You're a cuckold!"

Why did he say something like that?

Because people are gossiping

that this guest house is a brothel!

What do they men?

- A place where people screw! - What?

Did you believe it, Lillino?

I didn't believe it, but...

as of today, I'm coming to sleep here, too.

I want to personally touch, like Saint Thomas.

If it's not true, alright.

But if it's true...

I want to screw, too!

- You're not eating? - Yeah...

I'm going.

This pasta is good! What's it called?

"Puttanesca"!

Perfect name for pasta in a brothel!

Did you get the address from attorney Mandelli?

Yes! He said he enjoyed his stay here.

He enjoyed it very, very much!

- Everyone enjoys it here. - Yes, but I meant

in the specific sense of satisfaction, of fulfilment.

Even if he hadn't spoken... I would've understood.

- Understood what? - I am a doctor,

and give an immediate diagnosis. He had circles under his eyes,

looked stupid, stuttered, overall fatigue.

The typical post-coital symptom. You understand?

Sure! You said you're a doctor. Doctor...

Professor Settebeni. Call me "Edoardo".

Naturally I am counting on your discretion.

Of course! Did you have dinner or would you like to eat?

I prefer going to my room to get ready.

I'm against intake of food before the encounter.

I find that fasting a bit enhances the performance. Don't you think?

- Very true. Please, go ahead. - Have you already eaten?

- Yes. - What?

- Just one egg today. - Proteins are ideal for charging up.

Guess where Mr. Vincenzi is going now?

- To screw! - Yes, ma'am.

Miss Angela, see that I've become your guest, too?

- Are you glad? - Yes.

Are you sure one room is enough, Mr. Bresci?

If you want two, I'll give you the same price.

No. What are you saying?

- Are you sure? - Very sure! Thank you.

Thank you, Miss Angela. Thank you. Good night.

- Good evening. - Good evening.

Good evening! I'm sorry for what happened last time. Excuse me.

Alright, but it must not be repeated!

- Good evening. - You two are inseparable.

Don't stop in front of appearance. We met out here.

- We've no sort of relationship! - Oh, no! I can do without it!

- How are you? - Hello.

- Is the room the same? - Everything is fine. Come in.

Marshal!

- My gosh! - How is Gennaro?

To detox, the vet gave him a small pump with a drug.

His rear end hurts now, and he doesn't want to walk.

Look who's here! Honorable Vincenzi! How's it going?

- Good evening. - How's it going?

- Excuse me. - Please.

- Is the room the same? - Sure. Please go there.

- Thank you. I'll go right away. - Good evening.

He kissed me on the mouth to make me come around.

- That man? - Yes. Handsome, huh?

He looked better with a moustache. Handsome, elegant.

- Good night, Marshal. - Good night, miss.

Gennarino, shall we go to bed?

I'm tired! I'm putting on my pajamas and going to bed.

Miss, could you kindly come one minute?

Delightful, very seducing.

I am a man of the world, as you know.

And I know it's a good rule to pay in advance.

Mr. Mandelli told me the price. It's 50,000.

- Just for one night? - I'll be back!!

If I enjoy the stay, I'll be back!

But you should wear this now.

- What is it? - A Red Cross uniform.

An exclusive model. I designed it.

- Very pretty. - Why should I wear it?

For your performance. Wear it, and everything will be fine.

I swear, Auntie. I saw it personally 15 minutes ago.

- Your uncle's car. Are you sure? - Yes. I saw the license plate.

It was near Paradise Guest House, the place everyone says is a brothel.

He told me he was going to buy a clinic.

Here. This is your room.

It's no big deal, but we are just beginning.

Just beginning?

How are we doing, huh? How are we doing?

Lots of guests?

Pretty much. Bear in mind there are only two of us.

Just two?

Yes, my sister and I. We do everything ourselves.

Everything, huh?

- Let's get undressed. - Like that! Do it like that!

Like a real slut! Come on! Come on!

Just a moment, Rosaria! Let's get undressed together!

- Yes! - That's it! Go! Go!

- Do you like me? - Yes!

Yes!

Easy!

We'll have a night to ourselves, my love!

Finally my flesh will be yours, after having stolen my emotions.

Your flesh! Yes, Rosaria!

Call me "whore". Tell me I'm your whore.

- Come on! - Yes!

- Big whore! Call me "stallion"! - Stallion!

- Holy cow! - Yes, call me a "cow".

No, idiot! The zipper is stuck.

Are you sure Red Cross ladies dress like this?

Not yet, but it's only a matter of time.

Now come here.

Come, dear. Sit here.

You must examine me.

Me examine you? You're a doctor.

In fact. It's the contrast that gives me that...

Listen to my breathing.

My breathing.

You must not feel well because you're panting.

- Yes. - Feel my liver, please.

- Where is the liver? - Here. This is my spleen.

It doesn't matter. This is the gall bladder.

Here's my liver. This is my heart.

With both hands. Two hearts.

- I will say "thirty-three". - What?

Let me say "thirty-three".

Yes. Say "thirty-three".

Thirty-three. Now I'll show my tongue.

- Your tongue? - My tongue, yes.

I'll show you my tongue.

- Yes, my tongue. - Show me your tongue.

- Now, the thermometer. - I don't have a thermometer.

It doesn't matter, dear. Put your little finger here.

God! I feel so good!

I feel good and bad at the same time. Like something good that hurts.

Something bad that becomes good. A "bad-good", sort of.

Anyway, I'm in paradise!

Damn it! She's the one who beats!

You again! What do you want?

- I'll explain later. - There's nothing to explain.

Please, go away! Respect my privacy.

That's it... That's it...

Harder. More firmly!

It won't open. Rip them. I can't stand it anymore!

Rip them? They're new pants!

You care more about your pants than your Rosaria!

Come on. Don't be so depraved. Get out!

Gennaro, I can't sleep with you in the bed!

Go on! Get out! Put this in your mouth.

Put this in your mouth.

It's crazy! Wait. I'll give you something nice.

There. Alright? Did you see the powder?

Go on! Get out!

The two of us can't sleep here! You want some drug?

I know you do, but I won't give it to you!

I'll have you sniff it later.

Stop! In the name of the law!

Where is he? Where is he?

Where is he? Where is he? Where is your lover?

What lover? Only Gennarino, my dog, is here.

I'm Judge Damiani. You talked about vice, drugs, bed here!

Bed? I was talking to him. May I, Judge?

Marshal Pasquale Esposito, of the Third Anti-Narcotics Nucleus.

So... Who takes drugs?

Him! He's an anti-drug dog, but he is being detoxed now.

He's a valorous dog, and was decorated with a gold medal.

He once found drugs... Easy, or he'll get conceited.

He found drugs in a cake of cheese.

He ate it, but left the drugs.

There is no dog like him. A hero.

Excuse me...

What do you want? Don't call me, I'm talking.

Holy Mary! I thought it was a rattlesnake!

Darn it, Angela! You're dressed like Sandokan.

I didn't know you wanted to do it so soon.

You've finally decided! We'll make a nice love pile!

Group love. We're just two, but weigh as much as 15 people.

I don't mean to be rude, but I'd like to clarify

that I have never signed people who are homosexual.

You've no right to insinuate anything. Maybe I can do that!

- What are you insinuating? - It seems that you and

Marshal Esposito... well... - This matter must be cleared!

First of all, I'll ask for immediate transfer

of the marshal to Africa, and the dog to a pound.

Oh! What is this? A first-aid room for sluts?

How dare you, ma'am!

- Get out of the way! Edoardo! - Where are you going?

Miss...

Miss Giorgia!

Miss, we must do that operation.

- Leave me alone in my room! - You don't know that Valkyrie!

Edoardo! Don't make me waste time.

Edoardo! I know you are here!

- Edoardo! I'll find you! - Ma'am, calm down.

Edoardo!

I know you're there. I'll find you. It's useless to hide.

I'll find you, Edoardo!

Another one?

Settebeni, what are you doing here?

- What? - My wife's here! It'll be a scandal!

What? A scandal? Heaven forbid! I can't.

You know where Edoardo is! Tell me!

Come here! Edoardo! No. She wants to get me off track.

Edoardo!

- She's coming! The window. - What'll you do at the window?

- Where does that door lead to? - It's locked.

Easy! My finger!

- Huh? - You're smashing my finger!

Come! Come! Rape me!

Finally!

I'm coming!

Professor Settebeni!

- I'm not here! Who is it? - It's Giorgia.

Your wife is coming. Hide. She can't find you here.

- This is the end of us! - Here!

I told you. There is no type of screwing here.

- Please, follow me. - Where's my husband? He's here!

Who are you? The ruffian?

I am Judge Damiani, ma'am!

So you are the ruffian! I'm sure of that!

Get this out of the way! I am Marshal Pasquale Esposito.

- Alright! You come with me! - Where?

- We must arrest... - Who is this lunatic?

Follow me!

Naughty girl! You could've told me you like it!

I'm sure he is here. It's dark! I can't see anything.

Here he is!

Caught red-handed in a carnal encounter.

Oh, God!

What is going on? Where am I?

- On a horse. - Lillino! How shameful!

Why did you do this to me?

You threw yourself at me, and raped me, Angela!

Sorry. She doesn't remember.

You're not ashamed? Cheating on your wife with that floozy!

It' can't be! He's not my husband. Let's go!

- He's not your husband? - No, he's the lady's fiancé.

- Officially engaged? - Yes.

You bet! We've been engaged 5 years, and no sex.

Certain things are done after marriage. Know that?

Yes, but since the two of us are theater actors,

we did a dress rehearsal, and then will have the opening night.

- What? - Come, or my husband will get away!

Let's go, Judge. The lady is in a hurry!

I will surely have this home... this brothel closed!

You are making all this fuss,

but all we did was have a little bang.

- In a brothel! - You're a brothel!

Be quite, you harlot!

- What did you say? - I said "harlot"!

If that's not enough... whore!

Marshal, let my instinct guide you.

If there's a room where vice permeates, I sense it at a distance.

- I don't sense anything. - Come.

Ah-ha!! There's an orgy here!

My husband!

Well, I'll be... all respectable people.

Science, politics...

No, I was just passing by.

It's a very rare case.

We were talking about you...

- Judge, something dropped. - Yes, my wife.

Rosaria!

Bye. I was just leaving.

Ma'am, what are you doing?

What've I got to do with it? Ma'am!

My balls! My balls!

What a scandal! A ruined career.

Settebeni, don't be overtaken by panic.

I'm done for. If she finds me, she'll kill me!

- We'll appeal to the 1621 law... - I have always fought vice,

immorality, sin...

- And my wife is a... - Big pussy.

- What? - A big pussy!

- A hooker. - Yeah, it's what I wanted to say.

What if nothing had happened?

- Huh? - In what sense?

- What do you mean? - It's up to us to decide

if something happened or not. Don't you think?

Sure! You don't know my wife!

If there was a way to avoid the scandal...

I would feel much better.

We can still do something.

- Marshal Esposito. - Present!

You'll make the first move. We must gain time.

Edoardo! I know you're here! Come out!

- Stop! - Hold that dog.

- Where are the drugs? - What drugs?

Marshal Pasquale Esposito, Anti-Narcotics Center.

If my dog barks, it means you have drugs.

Let me go!

Resistance to a public officer.

I've never used drugs of any kind!

Nonsense! Gennarino is never wrong,

even if he's a bit dazed out.

- Is it in your undies? - Leave me alone!

I am Adele Bazziconi, a respectable citizen.

For having saved a girl from the Po River waters,

I was proclaimed heroine of the year.

Heroin! Drugs! My dog is never wrong!

- Get out of the way! - Where are the drugs?

Look who is here!

- What a lovely surprise! - Hold the shoe.

Come, I'll introduce you to our friends.

You already know Judge Damiani and his gracious wife.

- Here we have attorney Mandelli. - How are you?

Dear Miss Giorgia, owner of the guest house.

Here is our anesthetist and future cardiologist.

- I don't understand. - It's easy.

The professor made an excellent deal

in buying this villa to create a future luxury clinic.

- He's an extraordinary man! - What do you think, dear?

Who will give you the permit?

I could guarantee that.

- Are you capable of... - It wouldn't be the first time.

- Oh! - Want some champagne?

- You came just in time. - Yes, just in time!

- Alright. Let's toast. - Yes!

It's bad luck to toast before the deal is closed,

at least symbolically. - Symbolically, how?

The deposit, Professor.

Absolutely right. Of course. Excuse me...

- It's right to give the lady... - I did all this for that kiss.

Now we're even, ok? Or not?

50 million.

Here's the deposit. And now we can finally toast!

- Cheers! - Cheers!

So, all's well that ends well,

as in the theater works that Angela performed.

Angela finally married Lillino.

We sold the guest house.

It wasn't a great deal, but at least it served to pay the debts.

Now we've come to Puglia

to see the villa that Lillino finally inherited.

The one he always talked about.

This is Beethoven's symphony n. 5. Like it?

- See how marvelous? 24 rooms. - It's beautiful!

- We'll have a child for each room. - So many?

Lovely, huh?

- It's not in great shape. - Well...

But it's big.

Like military quarters.

- Like... like... - Like...

Like a guest house! Like a guest house!