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1
00:03:09,257 --> 00:03:11,341
- Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!
2
00:03:11,496 --> 00:03:14,104
- Ian, please!
Could you just calm down?
3
00:03:14,256 --> 00:03:15,380
- He did not know
I took the car.
4
00:03:15,536 --> 00:03:16,977
He will be
absolutely fucking furious.
5
00:03:17,136 --> 00:03:18,380
- Your dad
doesn't have to find out.
6
00:03:18,536 --> 00:03:19,780
We can come back
and get it tomorrow
7
00:03:19,936 --> 00:03:21,137
when we have the keys!
8
00:03:21,296 --> 00:03:23,500
- Fuck!
9
00:03:41,094 --> 00:03:42,382
Don't even think
for half a second
10
00:03:42,534 --> 00:03:45,055
you're going to break open
that car, mate.
11
00:03:45,214 --> 00:03:48,182
So get out of my face.
12
00:03:56,653 --> 00:03:59,141
What are you fucking looking at?
13
00:03:59,293 --> 00:04:01,978
Stop looking at
my girlfriend, midget!
14
00:04:02,133 --> 00:04:03,541
- Ian, please!
15
00:04:03,693 --> 00:04:04,697
- You want to fucky-fucky her?
16
00:04:04,853 --> 00:04:06,293
No way in hell,
'cause let me tell you,
17
00:04:06,453 --> 00:04:07,697
there's only one guy
who fucks her,
18
00:04:07,852 --> 00:04:08,976
and I fuck her real good,
19
00:04:09,132 --> 00:04:11,052
so go home and fuck mom now
you demented dwarf!
20
00:04:35,611 --> 00:04:38,415
No, please!
21
00:04:39,850 --> 00:04:42,251
Please, no!
22
00:04:45,050 --> 00:04:46,250
No, please!
23
00:04:46,410 --> 00:04:47,370
Please, plea...
24
00:04:47,530 --> 00:04:48,938
Don't!
25
00:04:49,090 --> 00:04:51,654
Ian!
26
00:09:11,191 --> 00:09:13,635
- Hey, I hope you're not
time wasting, you.
27
00:09:13,791 --> 00:09:16,235
I've got a dozen people
waiting to look at this place,
28
00:09:16,391 --> 00:09:18,115
most of them paying cash
as well.
29
00:09:18,271 --> 00:09:20,235
You got cash?
30
00:09:20,390 --> 00:09:24,395
Right, the light switch is
somewhere here I think.
31
00:09:49,509 --> 00:09:51,832
- Hey, come on, let's get
this fucking lease signed, hey?
32
00:12:13,659 --> 00:12:15,263
- Hi, this is Marc
from USA Actors Management
33
00:12:15,418 --> 00:12:17,099
regarding your audition request
for our clients
34
00:12:17,258 --> 00:12:18,338
Miss Williams
and Mr. Kitamura
35
00:12:18,498 --> 00:12:19,818
from Human Centipede.
36
00:12:19,978 --> 00:12:22,019
Neither is available for the
auditions in London right now
37
00:12:22,178 --> 00:12:23,345
because they're shooting
a movie,
38
00:12:23,498 --> 00:12:24,502
but thank you for the interest.
39
00:12:24,658 --> 00:12:26,022
Maybe we can do something
in the future.
40
00:12:26,177 --> 00:12:27,618
Good-bye.
41
00:13:03,175 --> 00:13:05,576
- Stop them tears.
42
00:13:05,735 --> 00:13:09,379
You're just making
Daddy's willy harder.
43
00:13:23,894 --> 00:13:25,214
Oh, my God.
44
00:13:25,374 --> 00:13:27,174
Have you shit yourself again?
45
00:13:27,333 --> 00:13:29,417
You swine.
46
00:13:29,573 --> 00:13:31,493
I've called Dr. Sebring,
and he's waiting.
47
00:13:31,653 --> 00:13:33,933
Get up!
48
00:15:37,764 --> 00:15:39,651
Hello, Martin.
49
00:16:32,841 --> 00:16:33,964
Mmm.
50
00:16:44,240 --> 00:16:46,563
Martin...
51
00:16:46,720 --> 00:16:48,083
come and join us.
52
00:17:16,797 --> 00:17:20,321
Well..
53
00:17:20,477 --> 00:17:23,924
Martin, I have your Ventolin.
54
00:17:32,876 --> 00:17:35,200
Martin, I'm here today
55
00:17:35,356 --> 00:17:38,117
because your mother is
very worried about you.
56
00:17:38,276 --> 00:17:40,480
- He keeps on talking
about a centipede
57
00:17:40,635 --> 00:17:42,435
with 12 people.
58
00:17:42,595 --> 00:17:45,923
What does that mean?
59
00:17:50,195 --> 00:17:52,596
- Now, let's see.
60
00:17:55,635 --> 00:17:58,755
A centipede can be considered
a phallic symbol.
61
00:17:58,914 --> 00:18:01,238
Centipedes are
very aggressive creatures.
62
00:18:01,394 --> 00:18:04,002
Their bite can be very painful.
63
00:18:04,154 --> 00:18:09,075
Maybe he is connecting the pain
that a centipede inflicts
64
00:18:09,234 --> 00:18:10,761
with the pain inflicted on him
65
00:18:10,914 --> 00:18:15,442
through years of psychological
and sexual abuse by his father.
66
00:18:17,913 --> 00:18:20,074
- I miss my husband.
67
00:18:25,112 --> 00:18:30,437
And it's your fault
that he's in prison!
68
00:18:30,592 --> 00:18:34,597
- Sometimes people
that are mentally challenged
69
00:18:34,752 --> 00:18:41,833
and have a history
of sexual abuse...
70
00:18:41,991 --> 00:18:45,516
mutilate
their own sexual organs.
71
00:18:56,830 --> 00:18:58,598
I'm sorry.
I going to have to go.
72
00:18:58,750 --> 00:19:00,911
There's nothing to worry about.
73
00:19:01,070 --> 00:19:03,318
I'm sure it's just
a passing phase.
74
00:19:03,469 --> 00:19:05,194
Hmm?
75
00:19:09,149 --> 00:19:11,550
Martin.
76
00:19:11,709 --> 00:19:15,637
Ah.
You're a good boy.
77
00:19:15,788 --> 00:19:17,676
Mrs. Lomax.
78
00:19:37,428 --> 00:19:41,595
- I've decided to kill us both.
79
00:19:48,466 --> 00:19:51,751
This music is driving me crazy!
80
00:19:55,386 --> 00:19:57,350
I can't stand this any more!
81
00:20:28,424 --> 00:20:31,031
He can't stand it any more!
82
00:20:33,423 --> 00:20:35,267
Come on, tell him.
83
00:20:35,423 --> 00:20:39,952
Be a man like your father.
84
00:20:40,103 --> 00:20:42,831
- Stop fucking bothering me,
you retard.
85
00:20:42,983 --> 00:20:46,507
I play my fucking music
as loud as I fucking want, okay?
86
00:20:46,663 --> 00:20:48,943
- Kill us both.
I'm begging you.
87
00:20:49,102 --> 00:20:51,983
- Shut your fucking mouth,
you old cunt.
88
00:20:52,142 --> 00:20:55,470
What the fuck?
89
00:20:58,702 --> 00:21:00,426
- I will play my music
so fucking loud,
90
00:21:00,581 --> 00:21:02,065
it's going to make
your fucking ears bleed,
91
00:21:02,221 --> 00:21:03,225
you cock-sucking dwarf.
92
00:21:03,381 --> 00:21:05,062
Next time,
you batter that fucking ceiling,
93
00:21:05,221 --> 00:21:09,149
I'm gonna come down
and break your fucking neck,
94
00:21:09,301 --> 00:21:10,348
Fuck!
95
00:21:10,501 --> 00:21:12,268
Fucking little cocksucker.
96
00:21:12,421 --> 00:21:14,669
Don't fucking bang
that fucking ceiling
97
00:21:14,820 --> 00:21:16,981
any-fucking-more, okay?
98
00:21:17,141 --> 00:21:19,989
You cock-sucking retard!
99
00:21:46,298 --> 00:21:49,059
- The lips from B and C
100
00:21:49,218 --> 00:21:55,263
and the anus of A and B
are cut circular
101
00:21:55,417 --> 00:22:00,185
along the border
between skin and mucosa,
102
00:22:00,338 --> 00:22:04,386
the mucus cutaneous zone...
103
00:22:04,537 --> 00:22:08,018
the circular mucosa
and skin parts
104
00:22:08,176 --> 00:22:14,178
of anus and mouth
from A to B and B to C.
105
00:22:14,336 --> 00:22:17,576
Connecting
the pedicellated grafts
106
00:22:17,736 --> 00:22:24,862
to the chin-cheek incisions
from A to B, connected...
107
00:22:28,416 --> 00:22:31,820
Ingestion by A
108
00:22:31,975 --> 00:22:35,619
passing through B
109
00:22:35,775 --> 00:22:40,455
to the excretion of C.
110
00:22:43,774 --> 00:22:47,615
A human centipede...
111
00:22:47,774 --> 00:22:49,738
first sequence.
112
00:23:28,851 --> 00:23:31,895
- Will you give me a high five
when we get there?
113
00:23:35,571 --> 00:23:37,458
- Hey.
114
00:24:32,046 --> 00:24:33,934
- Shh, shh.
115
00:26:52,397 --> 00:26:54,525
My lead.
116
00:26:54,677 --> 00:26:56,476
My lead.
117
00:26:56,637 --> 00:26:57,684
Hey, man.
118
00:26:58,877 --> 00:26:59,881
- Hey, man.
119
00:27:08,996 --> 00:27:10,960
- Ja, komm.
120
00:27:15,715 --> 00:27:17,363
Yeah!
Yeah, coma up ham.
121
00:27:17,515 --> 00:27:19,435
Come up, oh, yeah!
122
00:27:19,594 --> 00:27:21,603
Yeah.
Yeah!
123
00:27:21,755 --> 00:27:23,916
Very good!
124
00:27:24,075 --> 00:27:25,199
Yeah!
125
00:27:25,354 --> 00:27:27,121
I did if!
126
00:28:12,871 --> 00:28:14,955
- Whoo-hoo!
127
00:28:15,111 --> 00:28:17,031
- Why do these stupid things
never work?
128
00:28:23,751 --> 00:28:24,711
- Oh, Valerie!
129
00:28:24,870 --> 00:28:27,238
It's that guy from the club!
130
00:28:38,069 --> 00:28:39,029
- Shh!
There's...
131
00:28:40,429 --> 00:28:42,317
Babe, there's a midget
wanking in there.
132
00:28:42,469 --> 00:28:43,757
- You are drunk, love.
133
00:28:43,909 --> 00:28:44,869
- No, seriously!
134
00:31:38,617 --> 00:31:39,905
- Hi, this is Arianne
135
00:31:40,057 --> 00:31:41,824
from Creative Acting
Talent Management.
136
00:31:41,976 --> 00:31:43,417
You called us
with an audition request
137
00:31:43,576 --> 00:31:44,896
for our client
actress Miss Yennie
138
00:31:45,057 --> 00:31:46,061
from The Human Centipede.
139
00:31:46,216 --> 00:31:47,417
I just spoke to Miss Yennie,
140
00:31:47,576 --> 00:31:50,063
and she is very, very excited
and available
141
00:31:50,216 --> 00:31:53,097
to fly to London to audition
for the new Tarantino film.
142
00:31:53,256 --> 00:31:56,977
Could you please contact me
ASAP on my cell phone,
143
00:31:57,136 --> 00:32:01,020
713-499-0913.
144
00:32:01,175 --> 00:32:04,263
Thanks.
Bye-bye.
145
00:32:10,935 --> 00:32:14,655
- You can't do this.
146
00:32:14,815 --> 00:32:17,335
It's a film.
147
00:32:17,494 --> 00:32:23,735
The Human Centipede
is a fucking film.
148
00:32:23,893 --> 00:32:27,297
He is going to stitch us up.
149
00:32:27,454 --> 00:32:31,382
He is going to stitch us up
ass to mouth.
150
00:32:33,653 --> 00:32:35,060
Help!
151
00:32:37,013 --> 00:32:38,257
Help!
152
00:33:41,728 --> 00:33:43,889
- Stop them tears.
153
00:33:44,048 --> 00:33:47,452
You're just making
Daddy's willy harder.
154
00:34:22,925 --> 00:34:24,845
- What is this?
155
00:34:28,565 --> 00:34:32,492
100% medically accurate?
156
00:34:37,165 --> 00:34:39,248
Mouth to anus?
157
00:34:41,604 --> 00:34:43,612
One digestive system?
158
00:34:43,764 --> 00:34:47,528
Is this a perverted film
you've been talking about?
159
00:36:49,475 --> 00:36:53,359
- I want all this filth
out of my house!
160
00:39:04,986 --> 00:39:07,354
- Fuck!
161
00:39:10,825 --> 00:39:12,385
Doh!
Fuckin' hell!
162
00:39:12,545 --> 00:39:13,549
Ahhhhh!
163
00:39:13,705 --> 00:39:14,752
Gahhh!
164
00:39:17,465 --> 00:39:18,905
Fuck!
165
00:39:19,065 --> 00:39:20,952
Oh, fuck!
166
00:40:30,179 --> 00:40:32,503
- Swallow it, bitch.
167
00:40:32,659 --> 00:40:36,107
Swallow up.
168
00:40:38,979 --> 00:40:40,583
- Feed her.
169
00:40:40,738 --> 00:40:43,062
Feed her!
170
00:40:43,218 --> 00:40:44,265
Ahhh!
171
00:41:09,737 --> 00:41:14,418
- That was fucking sensational.
172
00:41:14,577 --> 00:41:16,377
And you know what?
173
00:41:16,536 --> 00:41:20,584
Your pussy smells gorgeous.
174
00:41:20,736 --> 00:41:21,980
Yeah.
175
00:41:22,136 --> 00:41:23,140
How you doing, doc?
176
00:41:27,415 --> 00:41:29,499
Oh, I rather fuck
that retarded boy,
177
00:41:29,656 --> 00:41:31,936
but... this'll do.
178
00:41:32,095 --> 00:41:33,142
- I know a place in Thailand
179
00:41:33,295 --> 00:41:36,099
where they specialize
in that sort of thing.
180
00:41:36,255 --> 00:41:37,935
Oh, yeah.
181
00:41:38,095 --> 00:41:40,342
Oh, yeah, she's a good one.
182
00:41:40,495 --> 00:41:42,655
- How much to fuck you
up the arse, darling?
183
00:41:42,815 --> 00:41:47,343
- For you, darling, 50.
184
00:41:57,253 --> 00:41:58,420
- Jesus.
185
00:41:58,573 --> 00:42:00,221
Who the fuck are you?
186
00:42:00,373 --> 00:42:03,898
What the fuck have you done
to yourself?
187
00:42:07,373 --> 00:42:09,457
That's right.
Have a good stare.
188
00:42:09,612 --> 00:42:12,940
Have a good fucking stare,
you little fucking pervert!
189
00:42:13,092 --> 00:42:14,653
Fuck off now
190
00:42:14,812 --> 00:42:17,573
before I get out of this car
and smash your fucking face in!
191
00:42:17,732 --> 00:42:18,572
Don't!
192
00:42:29,891 --> 00:42:32,411
- No, please.
Please!
193
00:42:50,690 --> 00:42:51,978
- Martin?
194
00:42:56,369 --> 00:43:01,573
Martin, it's me,
Dr. Sebring.
195
00:43:04,809 --> 00:43:06,609
So...
196
00:43:06,769 --> 00:43:07,936
this is where you work.
197
00:43:11,848 --> 00:43:13,692
This isn't right, Martin.
198
00:43:13,848 --> 00:43:15,889
What you're doing,
199
00:43:16,048 --> 00:43:20,128
it's wrong.
200
00:43:20,288 --> 00:43:23,528
Martin, I can help you,
201
00:43:23,687 --> 00:43:28,652
but you have to put
the gun down.
202
00:43:28,807 --> 00:43:31,207
Imagine what your father
would say if..
203
00:43:37,686 --> 00:43:41,047
Martin, Martin, no, Martin!
204
00:44:47,562 --> 00:44:50,126
Please.
205
00:44:50,282 --> 00:44:52,049
I'll do anything you want.
206
00:44:52,201 --> 00:44:54,285
Please!
207
00:44:54,441 --> 00:44:57,648
I won't tell...
I won't tell no one nothing.
208
00:44:57,801 --> 00:44:58,805
You fucking...
209
00:45:02,761 --> 00:45:05,925
Someone help me!
210
00:45:54,717 --> 00:45:57,205
- Hi, Martin, this is Arianne,
Miss Yennie's manager.
211
00:45:57,357 --> 00:45:59,277
I wanted to confirm
that Miss Yennie is not delayed
212
00:45:59,436 --> 00:46:00,844
and will be landing
this morning
213
00:46:00,996 --> 00:46:03,561
on London's Heathrow Airport
at 6:00 a.m. your time.
214
00:46:03,716 --> 00:46:05,636
I understand your driver
will be picking her up.
215
00:46:05,796 --> 00:46:07,040
I hope she does
a great audition.
216
00:46:07,196 --> 00:46:09,596
Thanks. Thanks a lot.
Bye-bye!
217
00:46:35,234 --> 00:46:37,557
- God, I cannot believe
I am here
218
00:46:37,713 --> 00:46:40,921
auditioning for
a Quentin Tarantino film.
219
00:46:41,074 --> 00:46:43,801
My agents are so excited
about this.
220
00:46:47,033 --> 00:46:48,516
I should probably call them,
221
00:46:48,673 --> 00:46:52,033
tell them I landed
and, you know, I'm on my way.
222
00:46:56,352 --> 00:46:57,596
- Have you seen
The Human Centipede?
223
00:47:00,993 --> 00:47:02,280
- I was really drawn
to the film
224
00:47:02,432 --> 00:47:03,872
because of
the medical aspect of it.
225
00:47:04,032 --> 00:47:05,275
If you were a surgeon,
226
00:47:05,432 --> 00:47:07,712
you could actually perform
that surgery.
227
00:47:07,871 --> 00:47:10,195
It's just so scary.
228
00:47:13,071 --> 00:47:15,079
It was so grueling
being on all fours,
229
00:47:15,231 --> 00:47:17,676
so I demanded in my contract
that I had to have
230
00:47:17,831 --> 00:47:19,391
an hour... long massage
every night.
231
00:47:19,551 --> 00:47:22,158
I mean, why would I not
demand that in my contract?
232
00:47:22,311 --> 00:47:24,035
Oh, and the rest of the cast,
233
00:47:24,190 --> 00:47:26,471
we all took showers before we
shot the centipede stuff,
234
00:47:26,631 --> 00:47:29,118
because I mean, you're close
to someone's butt,
235
00:47:29,270 --> 00:47:31,311
and you don't want to smell
anything and...
236
00:47:31,470 --> 00:47:33,030
or, you know, whatever.
237
00:47:33,190 --> 00:47:34,511
I'm kind of a germaphobe.
238
00:47:34,670 --> 00:47:36,514
Um...
239
00:47:50,268 --> 00:47:53,433
Oh, that must be Quentin's car.
240
00:48:02,587 --> 00:48:04,071
Do you have an umbrella?
241
00:48:04,227 --> 00:48:07,675
Because this rain
will ruin my hair.
242
00:48:08,708 --> 00:48:11,392
Okay.
243
00:48:13,467 --> 00:48:15,354
Oh!
244
01:05:11,196 --> 01:05:15,037
- Please, please.
245
01:05:15,195 --> 01:05:18,523
Please don't hurt me.
246
01:05:18,675 --> 01:05:20,443
Please.
247
01:05:20,595 --> 01:05:22,723
I'll do everything.
248
01:06:45,389 --> 01:06:47,757
- Hello, this Marc from
USA Actors Management again.
249
01:06:47,909 --> 01:06:49,229
Please disregard
my earlier message.
250
01:06:49,389 --> 01:06:50,994
Fortunately, Miss Williams
and Mr. Kitamura
251
01:06:51,149 --> 01:06:52,469
were able to reschedule,
252
01:06:52,629 --> 01:06:54,516
and they're really, really
excited to come to London
253
01:06:54,668 --> 01:06:55,748
for Mr. Tarantino's auditions.
254
01:06:55,908 --> 01:06:56,793
I hope it's still possible.
255
01:06:56,948 --> 01:06:58,072
I'm totally confident
256
01:06:58,228 --> 01:06:59,636
that they're gonna do
very well on this,
257
01:06:59,788 --> 01:07:01,196
so please call me back
as soon as possible
258
01:07:01,348 --> 01:07:02,472
at this number to confirm.
259
01:07:02,628 --> 01:07:03,675
Thanks very, very much.
260
01:07:03,828 --> 01:07:05,388
Talk to you soon.
Good-bye.
18001
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