Original subtitles

You think ever after over the end of the world?

I do.

I imagine that I am one of the last people on earth.

A large tsunami East Coast affected.

Everyone is dead, but I survived.

The minute I. The worthless I am.

I can swim a little ...

some people save ...

but I'm not very good.

There are those who are better.

And do not forget I that woman I drenching.

What a bitch.

What a worthless kutklotewijf.

Take that other bottle. He's in the back.

Fetch me a shovel. - What are you doing with a shovel?

You do not want it here tomorrow children walk through it?

You have a point, Lenny.

A redhead on the right. - Red pubic hair.

I have to suddenly think of clowns. - There's a blonde British.

How do you know she is British? - Her teeth. A little crooked does not matter.

But here is a clear gap.

Who is that nice ass? - That's new.

In my team? He's a little ... - How's your father?

Here we go. An emergency.

Emergency.

Dammit, Len.

You are a good start, kid.

A loss for Tauranga. - I was there first.

Little slow today? - Nobody is dead.

I am still in the lead.

You think you're so great.

Feel the glory radiating at you? - What is this?

The champions of the club.

Smithy.

Len Smithy.

Five times.

Multiple generations. My dad, me and a few others.

We go further back than the Greeks ...

or the primordial soup.

All the way back to the Big Bang.

If you have trouble, just call.

Remember when we were in school sometimes had to surrender?

Because the flu? - Of food poisoning.

Or because someone did something whose stomach turned.

If you got something pushed down your throat.

Yes something like that.

Anyway, remember what the teachers were doing then?

They took sand and threw it on the vomit.

What do you mean, Lenny?

Just keep digging. - Why? I'm ready.

It must be deeper.

Much deeper.

Drink, drink, drink ...

We have something for you, dude.

Lots of fun.

That I'm going to fuck.

Really, I'm going to fuck.

Like some privacy.

I have a big dick.

That's not something to be happy about.

Believe me, there's nothing.

When I was fifteen, we were always picked up and brought to the club.

One day was Mr. Smithy Lens father, cigarettes.

I sat in the back with the other boys. - Let me see.

One boy said, Take off your pants. - Let me see your cock.

Rot still on.

Come on, show him.

They tried to take off my pants. - Let me see your cock. Lets see your cock.

When Mr. Smithy came back.

"What's going on, guys?" he said.

Nothing, Dad. - Stuart?

Nothing.

But Len was not pleased.

Is it true? - Rot still on.

"Because if it is, you can be your advantage do it, "he said.

Yes ...

that is big.

What can you do with it? - Not much. It's just a dick.

No, it's a weapon.

It is an attribute. It's hilarious.

"I can take it there." And I bent down and put it in my mouth.

"Unbelievable," he said.

Here, people do not hate. They will accept you.

You'll be popular with your huge dick.

And you have a nickname that shows you are proud of your device: Paal.

Pole? - P-A-A-L. Paal.

Perfect. This cord can they mouth.

So if you ever have the feeling, for some reason ...

remember that he has a positive side.

Really, it's not that bad.

Thank you.

Can I have a salad?

He eats pie and chips, Mary.

That is what we eat here.

Tell me on, man.

What do you mean? - Where are you from? What are you doing here?

Do you have a girlfriend? - No.

Had it? - Okay.

Can I help you with something? - I see no price.

I think seven dollars.

Seven dollars?

Three.

See you later.

You must be hard.

I win this year's championship. - You blast me from the throne?

You kill the king? - I impale his head on a stake.

I'm going to win this year.

To celebrate, I have a table reserved in a three star restaurant.

Will you join us tonight on stage? - I reserved a table at half past seven.

Good.

Are you serious?

We are the guys from Parer Vale The top team from New South Wales

You can find us on the beach or at the bar red, gold, blue this club is for you

Philly tonight is a real man.

Does anyone have one? Can I have a moment of silence?

Phil.

Fancy a game?

There is no beach here, no sand, There are no chains and no sea.

A match between cocks. - What am I supposed to?

A first one of those ladies adorned.

Because a king without a queen can not.

Calm down, it's just a seesaw.

For you, Phil.

The evening is made for it, huh?

To me you are still the champion.

Come on, what's the problem?

This is a new shirt, damn it.

Thanks for your help, guys.

Drop dead. Do not you have eyes in your head?

Look at my shirt.

My mother could not believe I have something with a lifeguard.

"He earns money with that?"

That would suit you.

This allows you shocking good. Look what a nice thing.

You must be happy with it, but I can choose better.

The buttons ...

See what I mean? It suits you very chic.

I can not ... - I'll get a bigger size.

Today I'm going swimming.

Outside my duty to.

It was a weekday and I had a new swimsuit.

You need a little brightening up the neighborhood, not true?

I suddenly saw a woman in the sea.

She swam towards the open sea.

I saw her hair stand just above water.

I do not know what color it had.

It was wet.

Wet hair has only one color.

She swam and swam on.

Deeper into the sea.

"Hey, where are you going?" I cried.

"Let me go," she answered.

'What are you doing? The beach is that way. "

"I do not go to the beach," she said.

"If you continue swimming in the sea, you will drown, "I said.

, "I know," she said.

And then she kissed me.

Very soft and gentle on my mouth.

I kissed back.

I do not know why I did that, but I kissed her back.

I saw her swim away, farther away.

Her legs kicked water, her body slumped a little deeper.

And then she was gone.

Sunk.

Away.

And I thought of my swimsuit.

My stupid new swimsuit.

I thought it was stupid that I had bought him.

I had him.

I just feel ...

stupid.

Maybe they have to Clovelly.

Look at this.

It sounds musical. Like a symphony. Do not you, Pole?

I do not listen to symphonies. So I can not compare it.

Jesus, use your imagination.

You have imagination, right? - Fuck you, Lenny.

Fantasy. You also fantasize anyway if you jerk?

I think that's nice.

With your eyes closed.

In your head.

Someone tempts you to a kiss.

Someone clothe you.

Someone embraces you.

You will love it. You can here riding, walking in the garden ...

a little love on the porch ... And they have wonderful massage oil.

Hold on.

I'll call you right back.

I do not know what you mean. - Those cute bottles of oil in the chamber.

Maybe the previous owners.

Someone touches you.

I especially liked the nice sandalwood. - I find nothing.

What do you like it? Camomile and sandalwood?

I do not really have an opinion.

I once again tried patchouli, but that does not command me.

I felt sick.

Someone who you blow.

Oh dear, I fear I will not twin spent more freely.

You may feel better at home in another hotel.

And then you come.

In your head.

And in real life.

Should I call them?

No, we're having it.

Still, champ?

I want to go berserk. I do not want to go through the ribbon.

I have an aunt named Alex. - The tennis star?

It had been ten years should be dead. - She's nice.

Do you want to fuck my aunt Alex? She is sixty or so.

I'm just saying that I like her. - I can arrange it for you.

Alex is still a man's name? - Do you know what she asked again?

Leonard, what did you have this morning for breakfast?

I said, breakfast biscuit. - And toast.

Rusk breakfast and toast. She asked what I had done with it.

I said I had eaten it.

She said: You've done so normal. You've eaten.

I said: That's right.

And then she looked at me ...

without blinking her eyes. Even without breathing, I think.

"You did not put your ass.

You've normally done and do not put your ass. "

What am I? - Champion.

What do champions? - Win.

So you're going to win.

You're not in there. - He's a bit retarded. Not discriminate.

Where should we go? - I do not care.

Fuck you. - You're not coming in.

Hit me again. Go ahead.

Go ahead, hit me again. You cunt. You filthy cunt.

Fuck off.

I'll take your shoes off, Phil?

We can not give him ... - Are you afraid?

What a fucking stupid remark.

I think you're afraid.

A naked man?

I hate naked men. - Oh yeah?

I'm sick.

You do not want to humiliate him?

If we do not if we take off his clothes?

I do not know.

Remember, school ...

Tits or fat cocks? - Get lost.

Get lost. - I'm kidding.

You and Patterson are well thick, huh?

Michael. - Myers?

Patterson.

I hated him. - What have we done?

I caught you when you deducted without each other.

I do not mean that.

Michael.

Michael Patterson.

Remember what we have done with him?

Very funny.

And why do we do that? - For fun?

And?

Because we did not like him? - And thus?

We did it because we did not like him.

We did not sit down.

We did not sit down.

A big applause the lifeguard of the year.

The award this year a hard worker.

Someone who plays hard, and which is the foundation of this club.

And he has won five times previously. So Lenny come here.

Okay, calm down, guys.

Thank you.

Great men are not great without assistance.

You are not born great, but magnified.

No, but seriously.

I would not be standing here without the help of one man.

So with a heavy heart ...

I dedicate this award to you, Dad.

Smithy-man ...

Father champion ...

You're just such a sissy as others.

Want to be a girl, like the others? Because you're a girl.

In memory of you. - Mietje, be a guy.

Come on, you're not a girl? Come on, press.

Mick Smithy.

Very well.

Well done, Lenny.

Well done, you can still win if you do your best.

We win every time.

Come to the game if there is fair

we will win, and then you say:

at sea and in the sand the biggest club in the country

in red gold and blue this club is for you

we are the guys from Parer Vale the best club in New South Wales

we are at the beach or at the bar in red gold and blue

this club is for you.

Yes, Parer Vale.

What are you doing? - I'm going home.

Do not drink beer with the guys?

Congratulations, Lenny But I'm going home.

This is a special night. - I do not want to drink.

Everyone drinks. - I did not tonight.

Every night. - Do what you want.

I know you're a friend.

I know your secret.

So what?

God damn, I knew.

In our own club. In our own club, damn it.

So what, Lenny?

How does it feel ...

to suck a cock?

You fucking each other in the ass? Will you nice backstage?

Get lost.

Show me.

Show me how you do it.

Let me show you how one guy sucks. - Rot still on.

Hey Lenny what's going on?

He wants to go home.

What now? - That is an insult to the club.

I will teach you to screw our tradition. - Leave me alone.

Grab hold of him.

Is this what you want?

Is this what you want?

Shit ... I'll get the first aid kit.

I'll get the first aid kit.

Was Len? - Never mind.

Tell me what happened. - Leave it but.

Lenny ..

See you on the tower.

Grab a chair.

Something happened after the ceremony? - Not that I know.

You fly out, Lenny.

Len, did you hear me? You fly out.

It's not true.

I slipped on the tiles, and broke the mirror.

I think it was Lenny then with his father.

Come on, let's go to my house smoking blunts, and eat bacon.

You're too drunk to decorate someone. - This is your night. We're not going home.

Are you serious? - This is the place to pick up girls.

Yes, chicks with dicks.

That was in GQ. - I did not know you GQ read .

Are you afraid?

Take your clothes off, Phil.

I think he does not want.

Where are you going?

Look ... I kick him down.

I grab his legs.

His pants ...

Let me go. - Out with that thing.

And what now?

Pull his shirt off. - I?

I pulled his pants. You grab his shirt.

And who dig there? - Pull out.

With that thing you anyone split in two.

Thanks for the tip.

I'm Dan.

Um, I'm here with a friend.

I'm not ... - No of course not.

I think that guy is trying decorate me.

This is a gay bar.

Drink up, then we go. - He does not look at you.

You can not men, huh? - Right.

And your friend? - I did not fall on him.

Lenny would never do to a man?

He looks happy to be here around. - That's Lenny.

He remains on duty. He always looks if someone has problems.

You wanted to say something.

The point with Lenny ..

I do not know. He is absolutely not ...

I'm dead to the world.

Do you ever think at the end of the world, Phil?

I do.

I imagine that I'm the last man I on earth.

A huge tsunami East Coast hit and everyone is dead.

And I survived.

I Picayune. I Worthless.

What a jerk.

What a lousy jerk.

He can not fish because he never learned.

He can not have children ...

because he does not want.

What has finally all?

The only thing I society can offer is ace.

I can do that.

I may be bait.

You really have beautiful eyebrows.

I think you'll find Phil attractive.

Get lost. - I really do.

And you do not?

I hate him.

I do not come to his briefs. - It's your turn.

We do "rock, scissors, paper.

Two, three ...

You always chooses scissors stupid. - Get lost.

Pull out his slip.

Do you want something to drink?

What would you say if you would just piss off.

Lenny, this is Tom. - Do you have something too much, Lenny?

You are not going to lecture me.

We go. We need early on.

Phil champion. - Tom needs early on.

We're friends. Phil can for themselves decide. Not True?

I am champion. It's tradition.

Yeah, but you're with him in a gay bar.

I'll see you at home? - No, probably not.

You're such a fagot.

Flicker.

Yes, from head to toe.

I'm going downstairs. Have you been there before?

Grab him. - He's slippery.

Shut up, Phil.

Keep your damn head.

How do you feel now, champ?

Humiliated?

He's trying to cover himself. - Do something.

Have you got a small dick?

He has a foreskin. - I have the plague.

Would you prefer not prepuce? - Pardon?

A foreskin. - Why do you say that?

You never think about that? - I do not mess under my foreskin.

For me they have just done. - Your cock is still impressive.

Without foreskin I'm not protected from the elements.

As rain and wind. - Balls Pegs.

AI gewrijf it does something to you. He is sharp as a pencil.

So you have a penis like a pencil. - They did it may ask.

He looks different, He is not as sensitive as ...

He looks like a pencil. - Stand still broken.

That's not fair.

Sorry.

Are we friends again?

And where are you going, champ?

Hey, come look. We have Funniest Home Videos here.

Acorn, you want two legs in one hole stabbing, stupid?

There are two holes for two legs, Philip.

Very good, young dog.

Away from the jungle, away from the cave.

And among fathers wings from, you idiot.

I said you could run?

Come here.

You do anything until I say so. Agreed?

Save yourself.

Do you want that?

Save yourself.

Harder.

Harder.

Even harder.

Like this?

No, Phil.

So ...

Look, the two lovers. - Get lost.

Get up, Phil.

Stand up.

Fuck yourself.

Do what I say.

Put your fingers in your ass and fuck yourself. - Leave him alone, Len.

Shut up.

Let him well, Len.

It's enough. - Not yet.

Enough is enough, Phil. - Go ahead.

Free yourself.

In and out.

In and out.

Fuck you.

Go ahead.

In out.

Free yourself.

All right, baby.

You've trained harder than he.

What am I? - Champion.

And what champions do? - Win.

So what do I do? - Win.

You go on your knees, kampioentje.

Phil must not go home?

Little Lenny's cousin. - Get him. Give him more rum.

Give him to drink more. Hold him down. - I'm trying.

More.

Kampioentje ...

I'll still learn pipes.

In It.

In It.

Kots then. - He has nothing in his stomach.

Completely fit it in. Totally, to your gags. I want to hear it.

Stop him in, and in, and in.

I wanna hear you retching. In It ...

Kokhals. In It ...

Act like a man.

Plug it in. Deep in your throat.

Plug it in.

Discard the hole closed, Paal.

I do not do that. - What do you say?

I do not, mate. - I'm not your size.

Do not use that word ...

like a fog bank to hide behind.

I do not want oranges with you sit sucking at halftime.

"Hey mate, you remember yesterday? What have we laughed size.

It was to bescheuren you.

It was amazing. '

It's not great, mate.

What a bunch of crap, mate.

They are not men.

Not like those football players which crashed in the Andes ...

and who had to eat each other to survive.

Those are great guys. These are sizes from each other. Real sizes.

So if we ever crash with a plane ...

and we have to eat each other then you can call me your size.

But just then, amigo.

Only then and not otherwise.

And now throw that hole closed, Paal.

What are you doing with that shovel?

I throw up the hole. - You do not quite do.

I shovel sand and throw it in the hole.

You look like a girl.

You do not have grain for grain brag ...

and to submit it into the hole.

You take full job ...

and throws it into the hole. This is faster, and it is masculine.

You throw like a girl. - You defy me.

You run like a girl. - Stop.

You swim like a girl. - Shut up.

And you hit like a girl.

You have been to me. - What?

You've been sitting on my cock.

Not true. - You want to sit on him? Is that it?

What do you think? - You grabbed.

That was an accident.

Do you want to touch him? Go ahead.

Go ahead. Make me hard. Feel then. - Fuck off.

You liked it, huh? And you fall on Phil.

Feed him drunk, dressing him and buries him ...

Just because you like him.

I'm not crazy, Len.

You look at him in the shower.

You look at him constantly.

You go to his bed and kisses him goodnight.

You squirts him in the toilet.

And you cut him with a piece of mirror you have smashed his head.

Not true stupid loser.

I'm not a loser.

You're a big loser.

I'm not that.

What are you then? - No idea. A man, I think.

You are a man? Oh no.

I'm a man.

I'm more man than you.

I can swim further than you. - Proves that you're more of a man?

Good then.

You're gonna lose.

Help. Help ...

Len. Len ...