Original subtitles

Okay.

-Whoa, whoa! -Stop! Stop!

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Whoa!

Ursa, get me out of here.

Recalculating.

Proceed south on Pinewood Street, 200 feet.

hen turn left on Elstree Road.T

Proceed 100 feet to alleyway.

Arriving at destination on your right.

Perfect.

Thanks, Ursa.

Oh, geez.

- Ah geez, lady. - Oh!

Oh my God! Oh my God.

-Oh, it's okay. -Oh, I'm so sorry.

-That's okay. -Let me help.

-I'll just take that. -Okay, but--

Yes. That's okay.

-Can I help you? -That's alright. No.

-Okay. -Yeah.

Morning.

-Uh. -So, you've given up

eating your breakfast and now you're just wearing it?

Is Diane here yet?

-Yup. -Perfect.

Guess my beat-the-boss- to-the-office streak

has come to an end.

Well, you know what she says.

"If you're early, you're on time.

If you're on time, you're late.

And if you're late--

You're fired.

Cutting it a little close,

-Meg. -Sorry, Diane.

There was this delivery guy. And the elevator

-stopped at every floor. -No, I don't want to hear it.

Conference call starts in eight minutes.

Barely enough time to change.

I'll change in three.

Excuse me.

Oh, yes!

Morning, Diane.

Right on time.

Barely had a chance to grab a cup of coffee.

Mr. Howard, so good to see you again.

You remember my assistant, Jaime.

Good morning, Mr. Howard.

And our newest event planner, Meg.

Ah, good morning, Meg. Pleased to meet you.

Good morning, Mr. Howard.

Ah, call me, "Brian".

Please.

I want to personally thank you, Brian,

for once again choosing Opus Executive Events

for your team building retreat this year.

h, that's three years running.A

I took note of your requests

and I think our team here has really come up

with something very different this year.

Yeah. Hey uh, Diane, listen.

I really want to shake up this batch of students.

You know, challenge these people.

Make real lawyers out of 'em.

Welcome to Fourth Star Branch Retreat.

Recognize it?

-Kinda. -It's the former set

they shot Kevin Costner's Virginia Bound at.

That western from like 15 years ago?

Yes. A former Hollywood set for westerns of the Golden Age.

And I have been assured that every authentic

tinsel town touch has been preserved.

You and your team will spend three days and nights

at this picturesque mountain getaway.

Your retreat's theme?

Mountains, magic, and memories.

-Hmm. - From crisp mornings

to cozy evenings

around the fireplace, every details is taken care of.

Hold the phone, Diane.

I'm not taking them on a honeymoon.

This is team building.

They want to be lawyers.

I want 'em to be warriors.

Now tell me we're gonna get our hands a little dirty here.

Indeed. We have several outdoor activities planned,

including nature walks by day, and cozy gatherings

around the outdoor natural gas fireplace by night.

You might even get your toes a little wet

at the nearby river.

Is that a unicorn?

Ah, we have several little surprises planned for you

and your team. Including complimentary hiking socks.

The raw elements.

Diane! Real survivalist stuff.

Diane, listen, I want fresh.

I want new.

Right.

Of course.

It's all been taken care of, I assure you.

Wait!

Was that a picture of axe throwing?

Oh, it might have been.

We've had several team members propose a number of activities.

Whose idea was that?

Oh, we can get rid of it. I for one think

-it's too dangerous-- -It was my idea, sir.

Really?

o why'd you put that in there?S

Well, I...

I figured you're out in the mountains.

And-- and that's something people do there.

I mean chopping logs.

Ah.

And what else do people do, Meg?

Well, I did research a few things.

Um, the giant ladder for instance.

They're relatively easy to build.

Require teams of two.

The higher you get the harder it gets.

A slack-line obstacle course.

That could work for any terrain. Um...

Geocaching looks like fun.

Kind of like a high-tech scavenger hunt

with everyone scrambling in all directions.

None of these have been approved

or put in the itinerary.

Well, I just approved 'em.

Oh, well...

Diane, I want these people dangling from trees.

Of course, Brian.

We can make some modifications.

I can go over everything with you

when we arrive at the ranch.

Certainly.

I mean, she would--

Yeah, Meg, I'm really excited about this.

So, I know you're just gonna knock it out of the park.

Uh, yes, Mr. Howard.

It's sure to be an unforgettable Executive Events experience.

I have Jaime send the directions and details to you shortly.

Thanks again, Mr. Howard

for choosing Opus Executive Events.

Dangling from trees, Meg. Talk soon.

Well, it looks like you just talked your way

into leading our biggest client through the wilderness.

Diane, I don't--

Meg, you ran your own wedding

planning company for three years.

Cakes and wedding pavilions I know.

Mountains and nature hikes?

Listen, Meg, I hired you, because you know how

to give the customer what they want.

That is what we do here at Opus.

You want to take the next big step?

This is it.

Can I just think it over?

I don't need you to think it over.

I need you to follow instructions.

My instructions.

Which Jaime will send you to your device.

So long as you follow them exactly

you'll be fine.

Think of it as a recipe.

For a wedding cake.

Think of it as a recipe for a wedding cake.

Oh. I'd love to push her face into it afterward.

I'd love to see that.

And did you see the place?

Yeah. What's wrong with it?

Well, nothing.

It's a movie set.

A museum.

Tinsel Town Retreat?

Are you kidding?

Tinsel could be fun?

And a gas-powered fire pit.

Maybe I can find a

golf cart for their nature walks.

Well, they're lawyers. We don't want to get sued

if their cart crashes.

Now I may not know much about the grand outdoors,

but I know that this is not it.

Says the gal jamming a pair of power pants

into a designer backpack.

What? What, it's a backpack, isn't it?

You know, maybe Diane's right.

Maybe I'm out of my league.

No.

You're just out of your comfort zone.

Which is exactly where you need to be.

Open your email.

This is the map that Diane prepared.

It'll get you where you need to go.

And then, this is the place here.

Fourth Star Ranch at Hearts Creek.

Not far from where I used to go hiking with my folks.

And the rest of the instructions are all here.

We have all the gear in your car.

Just show up, follow the recipe,

and Diane and I will be there in five days.

Do you want chocolate or vanilla?

For what?

For the cake that I'm going to bake.

Continue 243 miles to Old Hunter Road.

urn right onto Old Hunter Road.T

Ursa, find alternate routes to Fourth Star Ranch.

Recalculating.

Continue 425 miles on highway 101.

Turn right on Route 15.

-Continue for 108 miles. -Oh.

Turn right on service road number 18.

17 miles to Fourth Star Ranch.

Estimated travel time five hours and twelve minutes.

Well, Ursa, looks like

we're both over ruled on this one.

Recalculating.

Continue 125 miles to Fourth Star Ranch.

Estimated travel time two hours and eight minutes.

Come on, Ursa. Give me something.

Okay.

Come on!

Come on.

Come on, Ursa.

Come on, give me something.

Give me something.

Come on. Oh, jeez!

Come on, come on.

Ursa, come on, come on, come on.

Anything. Anything, please!

Oh!

Oh no, no!

Oh no, no, no.

Oh...

Oh...

Oh my God...

Oh my God!

Please, do you have a cell phone?

Well, a-- a GPS then?

All the contact I have with the outside world

just drowned in that river.

Do you have any means of reaching civilization?

Got a horse.

I see that.

And a name.

Ry Taylor.

At your service.

Meg.

Sterling.

Oh.

Not a river.

It's a creek.

Looks like a river to me.

Didn't want to climb in and fish around for your phone?

What? And get swept away right along with it?

That's 6 inches of water.

Probably carry away a moose.

Maybe I just didn't want to get wet.

Oh my God.

Oh no!

Oh no, no...

Oh, okay.

Oh, come on. Please, please.

Okay.

Look, Mr. Taylor.

Ry.

Do you think you can help me get my car moving?

I can try.

Okay.

Hey, well, here.

No, it's okay. I got it.

It's fine. I'm fine.

Well, at least let me take your bag.

Uh, no. That's fine.

Yeah, thanks.

Well...

Yeah, she's stuck in here good.

Looks like it might be the front axle.

Car's gonna be here a while.

Oh my God. This can't be happening.

Do you have a car or a-- a jeep?

Nearest town is a five-day horse ride.

Five days? Oh no.

I have four days to get this car

to a place called, "Fourth Star Ranch"

at Hearts Creek.

Tinsel Town Retreat?

I know it.

-You know it? -Sure.

Well, Can you get me there?

Not before sundown.

My camp's just over this ridge.

Your camp?

Unless you want to sleep in your car for a few days.

Guess I don't have a choice.

Oh, you always have a choice.

I think it's only fair to warn you.

I know jui-jitsu.

And I'm a very light sleeper.

I'm just a tour guide.

Fine. Let's go.

You're not going anywhere on that ankle.

Well, what am I supposed to...

Uh, no.

Look, I am not an animal person.

-And I... -Don't worry.

Miss Lucy will show you how.

I'm fine. I'm fine.

Oh...

No, I'm fine. I can do it.

I can do it.

I'm fine.

A natural.

Let's go, Lu.

What were you doing on that road anyhow?

No one uses it.

It's so full of craters.

My phone told me.

Your phone told you?

A way that would have added five hours

and four minutes to my travel.

Ursa?

My GPS. My navigational system.

-Named it after-- -Ursa Major.

The Big Dipper.

I get it.

Clever.

So, what's at Hollywood ranch?

Well, in four days

12 angry lawyers and my furious boss.

And what's with all the equipment?

I don't know.

I just packed it.

Instructions were in an email on my phone.

Maybe if I just could everything there.

-What's that? -Just checking something.

Uh.

Uh, I...

I got it.

I'll get the fire going.

Good.

Might want to sit closer to the fire.

I'm just fine here, thank you.

Still checking things?

I'm calculating how long it will take

to get to the ranch.

I assume the horse can walk at a faster pace

than you. Say about 30%?

Don't know. Why don't you ask her?

Stuff's flammable you know?

I happen to have allergies.

-To what? -To the outside.

Look, how far is this ranch?

Well,

we're here.

There's a river that runs along here.

And there's a friend's place in between.

We'll stop there.

Over the river a ways is Tinsel Town Retreat.

And next to that runs Hearts Creek.

No bridge?

Kind of a bridge.

I wouldn't walk on it. River's low enough

we'll be able to cross just fine.

So, you live here then?

Yeah, I guess I kind of live all over here.

I can't imagine life as one big camping trip.

Can't imagine it any other way.

Oh. What... What's this?

Willow tea.

For the pain.

-Here. -No, it's okay.

-It's fine. I've got it. -Here.

Whoa. What is that?

A poultice of herbs and berries.

Herbs?

It's for the swelling.

Something my mother taught me.

Thank you.

No bother.

I've plenty of practice on Lucy here.

You know you're a real Prince Charming.

Well, you're never gonna get your foot back

in that glass slipper if you keep standing on it.

-Listen, you-- -Maybe you'd prefer to check

into the Royal Palace over there.

Have a little beauty rest.

If we leave by breakfast,

we should be at the ranch by lunch.

I need more than just a few lines in the dirt, cowboy.

I need specifics.

Why don't you ask Ursa?

Wow.

Oh, I don't think I've ever seen so many stars.

So, you're not out here making bombs

and writing manifestos, are you?

Sounds too complicated.

I stick to mountains, horses, and camp fires.

And showin' them to city folk when I have to.

So, you're a mountain guide?

Some of the time.

And the notebook?

I'm just an observer.

I guess it fills the rest of the time.

It is when I'm not mending city gals' twisted ankles.

Well, on that charming note.

I guess I'll check into the Royal Palace.

Goodnight, sweet prince.

And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest.

-What? -Hamlet.

Ha. And all this time I thought that was from Cinderella.

Oh!

Oh...

Met our rooster, huh?

There's coffee in the mug. And some biscuits.

Oh...

How'd you sleep?

Well, if you call laying on rocks and dirt

while listening to every hoot and rustle in the forest sleep.

Like a princess.

How's the ankle?

It's good.

Actually, it's real good.

How's she doing?

- Who? - Lucy.

She breaking any records?

Look, it's very important I get to this ranch on time.

Just saying we get there when we get there.

Just ease up on the reins.

I think I got the hang of this, cowboy.

Well, you're confusing her.

Look, I don't know what you think you know about me.

But I'm not some high-maintenance Southern Belle

come here to tour God's country.

Easy, girl, easy.

I ran my own wedding planning company for three years,

okay? I don't need some macho mountain man

telling me...

Whoa, easy.

Easy.

Huh. She did break the record.

What's with the stopwatch anyway?

Thought you folks had those things on your cellphones.

It was a gift.

From my favorite professor in business school.

For perfect attendance and punctuality.

What are you doing?

Nature calls.

I'm going to guide it.

Careful.

Those might protect from the bears.

But it's not the animals I'm worried about.

There's someone else in these woods.

Someone?

Guess you could call him a man.

He had a name once.

Now, he's just known as a prospector.

Like a lot of folks, he came up here looking for gold.

But heard he found it, too.

So did some other fellows. And they come up here

and they try to take it from him.

Except the thing is, he took something from them.

A hand. Usually the left one.

He'd let you live, so you could tell the story.

But survivors,

well, they didn't too much living.

That's a good one, mountain man.

You should write that one down in your notebook.

Hey, mister bear.

How about a Jingle Bell sing along, huh?

Oh! Oh my God! Oh, please.

Mister, I'm not after your gold. I'm lost.

I'm not a prospector. I don't have a pick or a shovel.

I don't even have a nail file.

Please don't take my hand.

What in Sam hell are you blathering about, lady?

Ry! Ry, I found him.

I found the prospector.

You better put that thing away before you hurt yourself.

Meg Sterling.

Meet my guiding partner, Curly.

Mad prospector, huh?

Usually uses the ax murderer gag

on the real jumpy ones.

My favorite is the ghost of Hollow Mountain.

Do that one around campfires late at night.

Well, that was quite the welcome party.

Well, I sure appreciate your jingly bells.

But when I take a nature hike,

I prefer to bring along my trusty Paul Bunyon special.

Oh!

I don't suppose you have somewhere to clean up around

here that doesn't involve ice-cold rapids

or mountain waterfalls.

Yes, ma'am. Got a shower.

-You have a shower? -Sure do.

Over yonder.

Handles are might finicky.

You gotta wiggle it some.

I myself only take three showers a year.

New Year's Day.

Independence Day.

And my own birthday.

Don't get too close.

Curly's born on a leap year.

Oh...

Got a bucket set up over there.

Just pour it in the pail, pull the handle,

and have at her.

I'll get the bucket.

It's a little heavy.

Ah, it's okay, boys.

I think I can figure it out.

Oh.

Oh!

Guess she figured out the handle.

Oh...

Oh, you've gotta be kidding me.

Lucy.

Good horsie.

Come on. Help a sister out, will you?

Come on.

Oh, bless you girl.

Us ladies gotta stick together, am I right?

Oh.

Maybe you should have taken the mountain waterfall route.

Oh no. It was invigorating, really.

Besides I had some help from our rooster friend.

Now if only Lucy could help me contact the civilized world.

You need internet?

Yeah. Ry said there was a place around here.

Well, that place is my place.

I'll go start the generator.

You don't have hot running water.

But you have internet access?

Well, sure.

It's kinda on and off.

Almost as cranky as my first wife, Lily.

So, you have a computer then?

I got a whole little set-up inside.

Why how else am I gonna watch

the season finale of The Bachelorette?

You send your message?

Yeah.

Hoping it will buy me some time.

Managed to print out my itinerary.

I got a printer?

What's this?

Doing some renovations for the palace?

It's a sled for the horses.

We can use it to haul your gear.

Here.

Tie these on.

My mother taught me.

I made one for the dog when I was 8.

Was hoping he was gonna carry my books to school, but...

The first time I hooked it up to him,

he bolted off across the river.

He was pulling my homework off the banks for weeks.

Like-- like this?

- I'll take George. - He's a little feistier.

Besides I think Lucy likes you better anyway.

Okay.

Okay.

No Kentucky Derby today, okay, girl?

Now remember, you're in charge.

She's fairly easygoing if you treat her right.

Heck, she knows these trails better than I do.

Use your reins to guide her left and right.

A quick pull back will stop her.

And a gentle squeeze of your heels

will get her moving.

You ready?

Ready.

Oh.

So, your mom.

She was a mountain woman, then?

You could say that.

She grew up in and around these parts.

And your father?

Rancher. Wyoming.

So, you are a cowboy?

Not me.

That was my mother's world.

Rodeo.

Heck of a barrel racer.

My father wasn't much for bull riding

and hog tying.

But a horse and a rider working together.

Poetry in motion, huh?

That's right.

Alright. So, what do you really need?

Uh, all of it.

Including this blender?

Yes.

All of it.

I guess this means this inflatable unicorn

is coming, too.

Land sakes.

You got enough gear there to supply a small colony.

There's a unicorn in there if

you want to float down the river.

Oh, your boss lady left a message.

Just before the Wi-Fi crapped out for the day.

Everything alright?

Between a broke down car and a broken phone?

Sure. At least, I got the itinerary.

What's that?

Tex-Mex seasoning.

-Want some? -No.

Thank you.

-I'd like to keep it simple. -Curly?

Nothing Tex or Mex about that.

Writing a new baked bean recipe?

Just some scribbling.

Clears my head is all.

It's beautiful, Curly. What's it called?

No name yet.

No lyrics neither.

Was hoping Shakespeare over there would write some.

-I only write tragedies. -Hmm.

Isn't that what country music is all about?

Lame dogs, broke down trucks, and girls who done ya wrong.

Country music?

That glitzy racket

that pop stars pump out over the radio?

Just 'cause you got a twang in your guitar

and a drawl on your lip, don't make you a country singer.

What about you, Ry?

Let's get a real cowboy perspective.

You see any cows around here?

We ain't cowboys.

You could have fooled me.

We lead folks around these parts

that want to be cowboys.

Or cowgirls.

Like some of them country singers.

Folks reckon you put on a hat and spurs,

do a little roping and riding, they can act their way into it.

No, ma'am.

We ain't cowboys.

Or ranchers and farmers work hard for a living.

- Mm-hmm. - Ry and myself.

We're mountain men.

What's the difference?

Well, young lady,

Going to tend to the horses.

Oh! Who poured their ash tray in here?

Got the grounds is all.

Just sip it. Real slow.

Hey, Curly.

Tell me.

What's Ry's story?

Ry?

Just kind of showed up one day offering his services.

Didn't say much about his past.

I didn't ask.

But I could see he sure knew his way around these mountains.

So, you took him in?

I was looking for a partner.

He was looking for a change.

Some people come to these parts to get away from something.

Or someone.

I couldn't say.

But it was enough to bring him all the way out here

three summers ago.

A person starts to start question themselves.

Soon they'll question everything.

And I know all about plans going down the drain.

Most plans are just maps in the sand anyways.

Directions scratched in the dirt.

And then along comes the wind and the rain.

Yeah.

I've had a few things get washed up

in the last three years.

Sure.

But life's made up of what you decide

to do after the wind and the rain.

I think I'll turn in for the night.

You happen to have an extra tent?

Got you all set up inside.

Why thank you, Curly.

A mountain man and a gentleman.

Goodnight, mountain man.

You keep these pots boiling all night, Curly?

Mm-hmm.

Coffee's hot.

Find any cigarette butts?

Not yet.

Where's Ry?

In the river.

Getting breakfast, I imagine.

Hmm.

You're gonna need these.

Ugh.

Any moose float by yet?

Not yet.

Oh, you found tracks?

Poop.

Poop?

I don't see any poop.

That's 'cause you're standing in it.

Oh!

Oh, you caught something?

Ah...

Yeah, he's fighting me though.

Rainbow trout.

And beauties, too.

Meg caught the big one.

Well, scooped was more like it.

Oh, that counts in my book.

I'll get these fellows swimming in potatoes in no time.

Actually, we're gonna take our breakfast to go.

I know a shortcut. If we head out now,

we should make Hearts Creek by noon.

Get everything set, and come back for the gear.

Mountain granola bars. Cool.

Got any more of those mountain granola bars?

Thanks, coach. Didn't realize we were holding football tryouts.

You think pretty quick.

Is that why they sent you out here?

Oh no. Opus Executive Events, I'm not supposed to think.

Just follow orders.

You do not seem like the type to follow orders.

How'd you go from weddings to executive events?

Practicality really.

If I wasn't chasing someone for invoices,

I was scrambling to drum up new business.

Guess I was just trying to keep it simple, too.

Maybe what you needed was a good partner.

Like me.

Like you?

Yeah.

Well, I found Curly.

Oh, yeah. Right.

I see.

You ready?

Ready for what?

There's a shallow part just up here.

Shallow? You said there was a bridge.

I never said that.

Said we could cross here.

I can't do that. You can count me out then, cowboy.

You'll be fine.

The river's low and

besides Lucy's done this a dozen times.

I'm not worried about Lucy.

So, you're allergic to water too then?

I hate the water.

You can't hate the water.

Civilizations began next to rivers like this.

Well, this ain't Egypt and that ain't the Nile.

Come on, Meg.

It's the only way.

I can't swim.

Alright, well.

You don't hate the water.

You just hate drowning.

That's right.

I don't care if it takes another day.

I am not crossing...

Meg!

Meg!

Meg!

Meg!

Meg.

Meg, are you alright?

Listen, Meg.

You're gonna have let go and swim down to me.

Come on, Meg.

You can do this.

Hey, swimming's easier than you think. Just...

Ah, it's more like floating than anything else.

Just let go and go with the flow.

I'll catch you, I promise.

Come on.

You can do it.

I got you.

There you go. I'm right here.

I'm right here.

That was some darn good floating.

I did it.

What? No trout and baked beans tonight?

Nope.

Ry's on cooking duty.

Says he got something special.

Really?

Don't you worry.

Got some chipmunk for tomorrow's bean menu.

Chipmunk.

Very gamey.

Oh, don't tell me there's not a layer of beans under there?

I was just getting used to them.

I found a jar in Curly's old spice rack.

Not sure if it's Tex and Mex.

I think the best before date was January '79.

I got a spice rack?

It sure is peaceful out here.

You think we can still get

all the equipment over to the ranch?

I added some wood to the sled.

Should float fine.

The river.

It was so fast.

There was just no way to fight it.

So powerful.

I remember when I was a kid.

It rained for four straight days.

Too much for the river nearby and uh, she burst her banks.

The water just ran straight through our sandbags and...

it's a flash flood.

The barn was completely gone.

And the house was gutted.

They lost a lot of animals.

In tears I remember

hauling those stupid sandbags back to the river

and just dropping 'em in.

My father stopped me and held me in his arms.

You know he said that,

the best that we can hope for is to manage nature a little.

He explained that, the only control you have

is your reaction to what nature throws at you.

Did you rebuild it?

Better than ever.

You ever miss it?

The ranch?

The life.

Yeah, sometimes.

Just couldn't find the right cowgirl

to settle down with, huh?

Yeah. Well, problem was I did.

Least I thought I did.

Guess I'll turn in then.

It's gonna be a long day tomorrow.

Goodnight, Meg.

Goodnight, Ry.

Oh, Ry.

Oh, Ry. I'm sorry you left your...

I just saw a few pages.

I...

They're beautiful, Ry. Your poems...

Oh. Good morning, Curly.

Why...

I...

Did... Did you do all this yourself?

Yeah.

Berry?

Hey, Ry.

Look who's on the breakfast duty.

Well, she even used your log cabin trick.

Coffee?

Looks like there's a grumpy bear loose in these woods.

He caught me looking in his notebook.

I see.

I didn't mean to pry. I just-- I wanted...

To see if he was writing about you.

Well, do you think he is?

Probably.

Along with everyone else he's met.

He's got a dozen of those little notebooks.

Probably got a whole one just on me.

Thanks.

You're welcome.

I'm gonna go get my belt on.

You're all wearing suspenders.

I'm the kind of fella that wears both.

Ry, I'm sorry. I...

Forget it.

Well, I wanted to ask you--

Yeah.

I'll still take you to the retreat.

Actually. I was gonna ask you

if I could borrow Lucy for the day.

You're going solo then?

I see.

This whole city slicker business was just an act.

Or you're a seasoned professional out here now.

-Hold on a second. -Look.

You make one little fire, you pick a few berries,

that doesn't mean you can handle yourself out here.

Spare me another partner speech, mountain man.

I think I can haul a pile of equipment

down a mountain all by my big self.

Really?

When do the caterers show up?

Look. I said I was sorry about the journal.

You just left it laying there.

And I trust that people don't go snooping.

Ha.

I doubt you've ever trusted anyone in your life.

Thank you for your hospitality.

I will endeavor to have your horse back before sundown.

Say.

You two heading out already?

No. Just me, Curly.

You heading down to Hearts Creek alone?

Yeah. I think I've worn out my welcome.

Besides I won't be alone.

I've got Lucy.

And she's a little more talkative.

Hm.

That one.

It'll take you right to the river.

Sled should float across fine

long as you got it tied to Lucy real tight.

Path on the other side will take you to your ranch.

Thanks, Curly.

You know, I seen mules with more sense than you.

I retired from life.

I earned that right. But you...

You got your whole life right in front of you.

And you're watching it pass you by.

My life's just fine.

I seen the way you look at her.

What are you talking about, old man?

For a man that likes to write a lot of fancy letters,

you should try speaking them to someone some time.

- Was it exit 201 or 203? - 203.

-Are you sure? -Yes. It's all here.

In your printed directions.

Do you anything on the iPad yet?

No service.

I knew we should have picked a closer location.

There are some perfectly good parks in town.

Mr. Howard wanted the raw elements.

Well, I didn't think we'd have to travel back in time

to the 1800s to find it.

Oh, I hope he doesn't have this problem.

Meg said it in her e-mail.

Wi-Fi only at the ranch.

Besides, we all have the same printouts.

You have our reservations for tonight?

Crystal Waters Lodge.

Check in at 5:00.

Check out tomorrow morning at 8:00 a.m.

Then it's three hours to Fourth Star Ranch.

Mr. Howard and his party arrive at 2:00 p.m.

And the Jacuzzi?

You made sure my room tonight has a Jacuzzi?

Check.

I can't believe people actually choose to come out here

and sleep on the ground in tents.

Well, I think it's very exciting.

Well, I do not want excitement.

I want perfection.

Look. Okay. I know Meg.

She is a details person.

Meticulous and precise.

Every flannel sheet will be tucked.

Every candle will be lit.

Every napkin will be folded.

You'll see.

Oh.

Alright, girl. You got three minutes.

No! No! No, no, no, no.

Lucy!

I hear you, girl.

I'm kind of tired of Jingle Bells myself.

What a game, huh?

Name that tune.

Come on. You don't recognize You Are My Sunshine?

Maybe bears don't like country music either.

Here goes nothing.

Oh.

I'm sorry. Maybe you do like country music.

Hey, listen, big guy, I'm taking requests.

Well, I'd like to hear

a little Silent Night if you're going back

to Christmas tunes.

I'd also like to offer my services.

I'm a seasoned mountain guide and a first rate horseman.

My rates are pretty reasonable

and I can get you some references if needed.

I'll take a verbal contract and I can start right away.

Well, you can start by reloading my sled.

You're the boss.

I'm also a legendary Unicorn wrangler you know.

I am happy to see those things reintroduced to the wild.

Listen, we lost a lot of time with the unicorn fiasco.

We're about halfway between Curly's

and the retreat.

And I don't think we're gonna make either by sundown.

You want to camp here for the night?

Well, tomorrow's doomsday. It's gonna come whether

we get to the ranch tonight or in the morning.

You pitch the tent, I'll start the fire.

Separate tents, huh?

Ever the gentleman.

More mountain granola bars?

Thanks.

I love this stuff.

Could have used this when I had my wedding planning company.

A good caterer can make or break you,

you know what I mean?

Why don't I make some coffee?

You know, I think recognize some of the berries out here.

Haskap.

Used to go to this berry picking farm

when I was a kid.

This one year I picked

two pails of raspberries all by...

Listen, Meg.

I want to get some things straight.

Oh, okay.

You see, well,

I've made my mind up about some things

and decided that I'm making some changes.

I'm leaving.

Oh?

This thing, I mean this--

this mountain guide thing.

I'm getting rid of some extra baggage.

And I don't want anything tying me down.

You know what I mean?

No, I don't.

Look, um...

Uh...

There's a lot of things I figured out being up here

and some things make more sense now.

Some make less.

That's-- that's not what I mean.

Um...

There's things that I know that I do want.

But there are certainly things I know I don't want

and uh...

Meg, what I'm trying to say is--

It's okay, Ry.

I know what you're trying to say.

I don't even know what I'm trying to say.

It's just...

Goodnight.

Stupid.

Just say the words.

Dear Meg...

"She's a typical city slicker.

But what should I expect?

he kind of person who can't seeT

the beauty all around her."

A wise man once told me

for a man who likes to write a lot of fancy words,

I should try speaking 'em to someone some time.

was hoping to get the courageI to tell this to your face.

But for now, I...

I just had to get this down, o there's no misunderstanding.s

"I couldn't spend three days with this person.

Forget the rest of my life."

I know we just met.

nd I know I don't always showA he inner workings of my heart.t

But I guess what I'm feeling is love.

I'm done trying to fix people."

I guess in the end,

I pity her more than anything else."

- When you read this, - I'll be back at Curly's.

I have to set some things straight with the old man

before I start a new chapter in my life.

I will return for your answer with an open mind

and an open heart.

.S. I'll also bring breakfast.P

Meg.

Meg.

Meg!

Mr. Taylor,

it is clear I have become a burden to you.

And while I appreciate your guidance thus far,

I cannot rely on you to fix me.

And I will not tolerate being pitied.

And so, I hereby my contract with you.

Do not follow me.

What's going on?

Where's Meg?

Over at Tinsel Town Retreat, I imagine.

You going somewhere?

Yeah.

Anywhere but here.

You're quitting?

It's time I moved on.

I don't want to leave you hanging, but...

Oh, don't worry about me.

I've been trying to retire up here for years.

But what about Meg?

Meg.

Here's what Meg thought.

-I don't understand. -Well, I do.

Perfectly.

Thanks for everything, Curly.

I'll check in on you from time to time.

Whoa! What are you doing, fool?

Ry, wait.

These are your words.

Yeah. And they don't mean a dang thing.

What's this?

More ramblings of a fool, I suppose.

Love is a strong word?

You're telling me these words don't mean nothing to you?

Not without the word trust.

You ought to thank your lucky stars

that a girl like that is interested

in your sorry life.

Here.

Take 'em.

Maybe one day you'll realize the wisdom in these pages.

And wonder how them words ever came out

of that fool head of yours.

Meg!

Meg!

All the equipment is gone.

Oh my God.

She could be wandering around out here.

With a car full of equipment?

But in the email, it said that she arrived safe and sound.

Oh God, I hate it out here.

Oh, of course.

Oh.

I want that place as cozy as a western home on the range.

Okay.

No firewood.

Good start.

Oh God.

Meg, you alright?

I saw the smoke.

No, Curly. I'm not alright.

What happened?

My boss told me to start the fire.

It was the second thing on her list.

Well, that shouldn't have been.

This here hasn't been used in a while.

Probably a bird's nest stuck in the chimney.

Say, missy.

I don't want to add to your troubles

but thought you might want to know,

Ry's gone.

And I'm not surprised.

Well, this might surprise you.

Fell out of his other notebook.

Curly, where is he?

Probably half way to California,

I would imagine.

I don't understand.

Listen, I'm gonna go back

and check if he left anything behind,

then maybe I can help you.

No, it's okay, Curly.

It doesn't matter now.

I'm real sorry for your troubles.

He's a dang pig-headed fool anyhow.

-No, I'm the fool. -Probably...

I'm the fool.

Think I could ever pull this off.

The good Lord doesn't judge us on our weaknesses.

He-- he judges us on our strengths.

You've showed some real grit out here, young lady.

Thanks.

I'm gonna...

If you need anything, you know where I am.

Oh, I noticed an e-mail to you from some fella named Brian.

Says his phone told him the service road was unsafe

or something.

I don't know...

Oh, the service road.

No.

Oh, no.

This is ridiculous.

She is obviously at the ranch.

You stay here in case she comes back.

I'll take the long way around.

All I can say is she had better

have everything set up perfectly.

No, no, no, no. No, no!

Hey, hey, hey! Wait, wait!

Stop, stop, stop!

No!

Oh boy.

What?

Oh God...

No, no, no, no, no, no.

Ugh!

Ugh!

Ugh, ugh, ugh!

Don't make me go out there.

Oh.

Meg.

Thank God, you're okay.

Well, why did you...

Where did you....

How did you get a horse?

A long story. Where's Diane?

She left for the ranch a little while ago.

Right. That should buy us some time.

Morning, Meg.

Somehow I don't think

this little mishap was on the itinerary.

I'm so sorry, Mr. Howard.

Is everyone alright?

Certainly got hearts racing.

But no damage except for the tire.

I was more concerned about you.

Oh, well, I've been on quite an adventure.

And so have you.

This blown tire is a perfect example.

-Oh? -Yeah.

It's quite fortuitous you see.

Because well, things have changed, Mr. Howard.

Changed?

Yeah.

The itinerary I put together,

that was more of a rough outline.

What mountain men out here like to call,

"a map in the sand".

You said you wanted to test your interns, Brian.

Well, for the next few days,

we're gonna see what you're all made of.

You got to go with what life throws at you.

And out here, it's a lot.

But it ain't green goose smoothies.

And it ain't manicured bits of time.

And it ain't unicorns.

It's wit, grit, and guts.

So, cinch your saddles and grab your paddles,

'cause for the next few days we're riding the rapids.

Oh God. Now that...

That is what I'm talking about.

Now, I mean Diane had me going there for a while

with that itinerary.

I mean, I knew it had to be a joke.

Oh, young lady, this-- this is music to my ears.

Okay.

So, grab only what you can carry and follow me.

We'll arrange for a tow truck once we get to the ranch.

Well, alright, troops.

You heard her.

Let's gear up!

-So, what's the plan? -I know a shortcut.

If Diane's taking the long way around,

it gives us just enough time to beat her there.

Try to save this whole thing.

And if not?

I haven't thought that far ahead.

So, these marks here are left by a grizzly bear

who stood up and scared his prey.

Cherry.

So these are deer droppings.

-Oh. -They run in packs.

So, usually when you see this, it means that game is nearby.

Nice.

Ah, so it's just kind of back there.

You can see the peak.

Oh, sweet.

Um, I don't know about this.

-Can we eat it? -So, this is tree moss.

And it's on this side of the tree.

And this side of the tree is dry.

Because when the sun rises,

it comes up this way and over on this side.

So, this side always stays wet and mossy.

That's incredible.

You done this trekking often?

Yeah.

Yeah.

What is this?

It's the shortcut.

Maybe there's a bridge near.

No bridge.

We're gonna have wade across. But right now,

this is our only chance at beating Diane to the ranch.

But I thought you told me you don't do water.

Guess I'm getting used to it out here.

Hey.

Well, scouts!

What have we got here?

Looks like we're gonna get a little wet.

Brian?

Okay.

Well, troops,

sounds like we got our first real true test, huh?

Wit, grit,

and guts.

Let's go.

I can't swim.

Oh, don't worry, Sherry.

It's more floating than anything.

I tell you what, you can ride on Lucy.

She's an old pro at this.

Come on.

Watch your step.

Just put your foot in the stirrup there.

Right.

There you go and jump.

Hey, you alright?

Yeah.

You got this.

I've never felt so alive!

You did great.

Thanks. So did you.

Well, Mountain Meg.

What now?

Yeah, what now?

Oh.

Where are the sidewalks?

Hey um,

how'd you like the experience so far?

So, what are you gonna do once we get there?

I have no idea.

This could all still end in disaster.

Well then, let's just make it a disaster of a lifetime.

With the mountains, magic, and memories.

Oh, it'll be memorable alright.

Trashed equipment,

a fake ranch house, and a busted stove.

Maybe we can set the whole place ablaze

and roast weenies around it.

Okay, first things first. I'll get the fire going.

Get everyone dry.

Then we need to salvage the equipment

and we'll figure out sleeping arrangements later.

And...

Curly, you...

How did you...

Sorry, we're late, ma'am.

Never did win any awards for punctuality.

Well, maybe you could this to time them city slickers

on our obstacle course.

Thank you, Curly.

-I um... -I read your note.

Well, I...

I read your notebook.

It seemed pretty clear.

It was pretty clear, alright.

At the time I wrote it.

If you're gonna go snooping,

make sure you got the right book.

Here.

Check the date.

Three years ago.

Right.

It's when I first came up here.

This notebook's about my ex.

And I can understand how'd you feel

if you thought it was about you.

This...

This is the notebook I've been writing in about you.

You did all this?

Ry Taylor.

At your service.

Absolutely spectacular.

The camp, I mean.

I'm just a hired hand. This was all Meg's doing.

Ry's the mountain guide

and he's been helping me out here.

He taught me to see a lot of things

I didn't notice before.

Meg here taught me a few things, too.

Right.

I see.

Meg! Oh.

Meg! Where is she?

This is outrageous.

What the...

What is this?

Who are these people?

Mr. Howard.

Wha...

How did you get here?

Well... Mountain Meg here guided us through the wilderness.

It was awesome!

Is this...

Did you do this?

Wait, Diane. I can explain.

I started the fire inside just like you asked me to.

It's a disaster.

The stove is clogged.

How can you be so incompetent?

This is your Fourth Star Ranch!

Only it's been abandoned for about 10 years.

But the online ad said picturesque mountain...

That's what mountain men call getting it in the neck.

Swindled.

My unicorns.

My blender.

Oh, Miss Sterling.

You are reckless.

You are insubordinate.

And you are fired.

Whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Hold the phone, Diane.

Now I am so sorry for what this amateur

has put you through, Mr. Howard.

I'm the client.

If anyone's doing any firing around here, it's me.

I agree wholeheartedly, Brian.

Diane, you're fired.

Yeah. Yeah, it was your crazy directions

that got us into trouble to begin with.

-No, but I was-- -We just had

the trek of a lifetime.

Hell, I actually think these people broke a sweat.

And it's all thanks to Mountain Meg here.

You can keep the deposit, Diane.

Far as I'm concerned,

I'm booking my next retreat with this young lady

and her mountain man boyfriend there.

Pssh. Come on.

I mean it's pretty obvious, folks.

I'm a lawyer.

I can see the truth in your eyes.

Jamie, get me an Uber.

I'll be inside.

Hey!

Think you're gonna need a little bit of magic

for that, Diane.

'Cause you're on your own.

I think I'm going to put in my application

to a new start-up mountain guide company I just heard about.

Give me my blender!

Well, folks.

Beans are on and the fire is warm.

Beans...

Listen, about my note, I'm sorry.

I-- I didn't understand.

It's alright.

Besides, some of what you said was true.

I read your note, too.

Did you still mean that part about a place for me

in your story?

Well, you two will be happy to know

I found some words for my song.

I call it, "the Ballad of Meg and Ry".