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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162 WWW.MY-SUBS.CO 1 00:00:02,042 --> 00:00:03,477 Tally: You're always really sweatin' it 2 00:00:03,512 --> 00:00:05,714 and I really admire that effort to do something 3 00:00:05,748 --> 00:00:07,838 that is not maybe the most natural to you. 4 00:00:08,064 --> 00:00:10,198 I've been putting together a weekly reading. 5 00:00:10,233 --> 00:00:11,934 It's tomorrow night. I think you should come read something. 6 00:00:11,968 --> 00:00:14,005 Ray: Your cousin told me to stay with you 7 00:00:14,040 --> 00:00:16,908 because she didn't want you to be left alone because you smoked crack. 8 00:00:16,942 --> 00:00:18,612 You know, you could be a little more supportive. 9 00:00:18,646 --> 00:00:21,215 Do you have any idea how much money you owe me at this point? 10 00:00:21,249 --> 00:00:23,885 Katherine: I bet you get into these dramas all the time. 11 00:00:23,919 --> 00:00:25,486 You're doing it to distract yourself 12 00:00:25,520 --> 00:00:27,221 from becoming the person you're meant to be. 13 00:00:27,255 --> 00:00:28,355 I want to be part of the group. 14 00:00:28,390 --> 00:00:32,092 - That will never happen. - Jessa. 15 00:00:32,126 --> 00:00:34,094 I wrote something new on the subway on the way here. 16 00:00:34,129 --> 00:00:35,262 I shouldn't have done the reading. 17 00:00:35,296 --> 00:00:36,663 No, what you should have done was read 18 00:00:36,697 --> 00:00:38,098 that historical piece you sent me. 19 00:00:38,132 --> 00:00:40,834 - I'm really sorry. - Hey. Hannah. 20 00:00:40,868 --> 00:00:43,638 I have an S.T.D. and I'm pretty sure you gave it to me. 21 00:00:43,673 --> 00:00:45,641 I do not want to live here anymore. 22 00:00:45,675 --> 00:00:47,811 I don't want to live with you anymore either. 23 00:00:50,205 --> 00:00:58,205 Sync & corrections by honeybunny www.MY-SUBS.com 24 00:00:58,526 --> 00:01:00,361 - Hannah: Fuck, I'm crushed! - Marnie: No, you're not. 25 00:01:00,395 --> 00:01:02,130 - Adam: Go, go, go! Down! - I'm telling you-- 26 00:01:02,165 --> 00:01:04,766 - We're four feet away. - We're so close, Hannah. 27 00:01:04,801 --> 00:01:06,736 - It's crushing me. It's-- - Here, move. 28 00:01:06,770 --> 00:01:08,438 - I got it. I got it. - You don't got it. 29 00:01:08,473 --> 00:01:10,441 - Yeah, I do. - You don't need to be a hero about this. 30 00:01:10,475 --> 00:01:11,609 You know what? I trust him. 31 00:01:11,643 --> 00:01:13,244 If he says he's got it, he's got it. 32 00:01:13,278 --> 00:01:15,514 - You got it? - I got it. I so got it. Just leave, leave. 33 00:01:15,548 --> 00:01:16,882 I trust-- the move of trust. 34 00:01:16,916 --> 00:01:18,551 Look, there's an ice-cream truck outside. 35 00:01:18,585 --> 00:01:20,420 - Okay, okay. - Go, go. 36 00:01:20,454 --> 00:01:22,323 - Ow. Are you sure? - Yes, yes, yes, yes. 37 00:01:22,357 --> 00:01:23,991 - I'll help you. I'll hold this-- - No, no, no. 38 00:01:24,026 --> 00:01:25,894 Just walk away. 39 00:01:25,928 --> 00:01:28,097 ( Music playing ) 40 00:01:43,581 --> 00:01:45,048 Gotta get going. I have to pick up 41 00:01:45,083 --> 00:01:47,551 the keys from Shoshanna before she goes to class. 44 00:01:54,425 --> 00:01:55,792 Yeah, but you don't have a plan. 45 00:01:55,826 --> 00:01:57,827 I think maybe that's a good thing for me. 46 00:01:59,063 --> 00:02:01,198 Okay. 47 00:02:02,601 --> 00:02:04,102 I will see you. 48 00:02:04,136 --> 00:02:07,605 - On purpose? - Don't push. 49 00:02:09,275 --> 00:02:11,610 ( Door opens, closes ) 50 00:02:11,645 --> 00:02:14,347 ( Engine starts ) 51 00:02:18,252 --> 00:02:20,720 - Hannah: That was really intense. - Yeah. 52 00:02:20,755 --> 00:02:22,923 There wasn't even that much shit to move. 53 00:02:22,957 --> 00:02:24,391 No, I mean, like, with Marnie. 54 00:02:24,425 --> 00:02:26,893 Like, she's not even angry, I don't think. 55 00:02:26,928 --> 00:02:28,795 She's just, like, really hurt. 56 00:02:28,829 --> 00:02:31,698 - Well, how do you feel? - Guilty. 57 00:02:31,732 --> 00:02:35,368 Don't waste time on guilt, Hannah. 58 00:02:35,403 --> 00:02:37,103 Holding onto toxic relationships 59 00:02:37,137 --> 00:02:38,404 is what keeps us from growing. 60 00:02:38,439 --> 00:02:40,540 You're forming every time you shed a layer, 61 00:02:40,575 --> 00:02:42,509 getting closer to yourself. 62 00:02:42,544 --> 00:02:43,944 I mean, look at this place. 63 00:02:43,979 --> 00:02:46,781 It's half empty now, full of potential. 64 00:02:46,815 --> 00:02:48,916 Anything could happen. 65 00:02:48,951 --> 00:02:51,452 - ( Laughing ) - ( Growling ) 66 00:02:51,487 --> 00:02:56,124 - Now Marnie's weird fake grown-up stuff is gone. - Maybe I'll move in. 67 00:02:56,158 --> 00:02:58,026 Really? 68 00:03:04,267 --> 00:03:05,667 I hate today. 69 00:03:05,702 --> 00:03:07,936 I hate today so much that I might not even go to class. 70 00:03:07,971 --> 00:03:10,572 - Why? It is so gorgeous outside. - Yeah, I know. 71 00:03:10,606 --> 00:03:12,541 It, like, really gives me this uneasy feeling. 72 00:03:12,575 --> 00:03:14,309 It's like this certain kind of spring itch. 73 00:03:14,344 --> 00:03:15,978 You know what I mean? I saw three people 74 00:03:16,012 --> 00:03:17,713 touching tongues outside of my final yesterday. 75 00:03:17,747 --> 00:03:19,648 Like, three couples? 76 00:03:19,682 --> 00:03:21,816 No, three people. 77 00:03:21,851 --> 00:03:23,485 Ugh. I'm sorry you saw that. 78 00:03:23,519 --> 00:03:25,053 Where's Jessa? 79 00:03:25,088 --> 00:03:27,555 Are you sure it's okay that I'm sleeping in her bed? 80 00:03:27,590 --> 00:03:29,157 Um, yeah. I don't know. 81 00:03:29,191 --> 00:03:31,059 I haven't heard from her for, like, a full 24/7. 82 00:03:31,093 --> 00:03:33,295 And I'd totally be worried, except she's been texting all the time 83 00:03:33,329 --> 00:03:34,630 and all her junk is still here. 84 00:03:34,664 --> 00:03:38,400 Well, thank you for letting me stay here. 85 00:03:38,435 --> 00:03:40,302 I'm actually gonna start looking 86 00:03:40,336 --> 00:03:42,838 for a new place tomorrow. 87 00:03:42,872 --> 00:03:44,339 Oh, my God. Totally, don't. 88 00:03:44,373 --> 00:03:45,941 Don't. Really, don't. 89 00:03:45,975 --> 00:03:48,077 Like, stay as long as you want. Stay forever. 90 00:03:48,111 --> 00:03:49,545 Let's actually-- you know what? 91 00:03:49,580 --> 00:03:52,615 Let's just, like, find a place to put this, like, forever. 92 00:03:52,649 --> 00:03:54,150 Okay. 93 00:03:54,184 --> 00:03:55,751 Um, right here. 94 00:03:55,785 --> 00:03:58,453 ( Music playing over stereo ) 95 00:03:58,487 --> 00:04:00,822 ( Phone chimes ) 96 00:04:04,127 --> 00:04:07,363 This book is fucking incredible. 97 00:04:07,397 --> 00:04:11,467 Anything by a British woman is just-- fuck. 98 00:04:11,501 --> 00:04:13,736 Hey, Ray, 99 00:04:13,770 --> 00:04:15,505 I'm really sorry about this, 100 00:04:15,539 --> 00:04:16,906 but I'm really not feeling well 101 00:04:16,940 --> 00:04:19,008 and I think that I may have to leave early. 102 00:04:19,043 --> 00:04:20,476 Why? What's wrong? 103 00:04:20,511 --> 00:04:23,446 My throat just feels very kind of like allergic and scratchy. 104 00:04:23,480 --> 00:04:25,549 It's like-- it's just hotness. 105 00:04:25,583 --> 00:04:28,252 I think it's from this expired mylanta that I drank. 106 00:04:28,286 --> 00:04:31,021 Mm. Expired mylanta-- you don't wanna drink that. 107 00:04:31,056 --> 00:04:32,623 ( Clucking ) 108 00:04:32,658 --> 00:04:35,260 - Like you know you're gonna get sick? - Expired mylanta. 109 00:04:35,294 --> 00:04:37,562 Your illness couldn't possibly be related to this text message 110 00:04:37,597 --> 00:04:39,731 I received from Jessa about 20 minutes ago, could it? 111 00:04:39,766 --> 00:04:42,935 "Please come to the most important party of my life. 112 00:04:42,969 --> 00:04:46,371 7:00 P.M. sharp. Dress real nice and come." 113 00:04:46,439 --> 00:04:48,507 Use your head, okay? 114 00:04:48,574 --> 00:04:50,742 We're in the same friendship circle. 115 00:04:50,776 --> 00:04:53,511 Also, do you really think you've worked here long enough to deserve a reading break? 116 00:04:53,545 --> 00:04:56,180 Well, you know what? No one's here, so I just thought-- 117 00:04:56,215 --> 00:04:57,882 Don't just think, okay? 118 00:04:57,916 --> 00:05:00,117 That's an extremely unattractive feature of your generation. 119 00:05:00,151 --> 00:05:02,887 Empty those two pitchers and run home and change. 120 00:05:04,189 --> 00:05:07,357 What in God's name is this party for? 121 00:05:07,392 --> 00:05:08,959 I don't know, 122 00:05:08,993 --> 00:05:11,861 but she told me if I didn't come, she'd gut me like a fish. 123 00:05:11,896 --> 00:05:14,564 - ( Chattering ) - Fuck. 124 00:05:14,598 --> 00:05:16,132 Oh, my God. It's your one true love. 125 00:05:16,166 --> 00:05:18,734 - Where's his new girlfriend? - I'm fine. 126 00:05:18,769 --> 00:05:20,436 I'm in a really good place in my life. 127 00:05:20,470 --> 00:05:22,971 Totally. Everything you own is in trash bags in my kitchen. 128 00:05:23,006 --> 00:05:24,540 Hey. 129 00:05:24,574 --> 00:05:26,341 - I'll see you in there. - Marnie: Uh-huh. 130 00:05:26,376 --> 00:05:29,278 - Hey, it's you. - Shoshanna: Hi. 131 00:05:30,180 --> 00:05:31,981 He looked at me weird. 132 00:05:32,015 --> 00:05:34,250 See? Today is totally weird. 133 00:05:35,719 --> 00:05:38,387 Party. It's a mystery party. 134 00:05:39,657 --> 00:05:42,925 My shoes match my dress... kind of. 135 00:05:42,960 --> 00:05:45,962 ( Music playing, people chattering ) 136 00:05:45,996 --> 00:05:48,631 This is gonna be an "Eyes Wide Shut" party. 137 00:05:48,665 --> 00:05:49,932 Getting that vibe. 138 00:05:49,967 --> 00:05:51,901 Woman: Whose party are you here with? 139 00:05:51,935 --> 00:05:54,003 Adam: I don't know. It's a secret party. 140 00:05:54,037 --> 00:05:56,339 Oh, wait. He's with me. 141 00:05:56,373 --> 00:05:58,641 She's being very elitist and cruel. 142 00:05:58,675 --> 00:06:02,144 - Hannah: Just get up here. - I can see up your dress. 143 00:06:04,381 --> 00:06:06,282 My name was on that paper. 144 00:06:06,316 --> 00:06:08,551 Adam Sackler was on that paper. 145 00:06:08,586 --> 00:06:10,286 You look very beautiful. 146 00:06:10,320 --> 00:06:13,256 Thank you. You look very dapper. 147 00:06:13,290 --> 00:06:16,292 Not one, but two plaids. ( Clicks tongue ) 148 00:06:16,326 --> 00:06:18,194 Heh-hey, how's it going? 149 00:06:18,228 --> 00:06:19,729 Uh, hello. 150 00:06:19,763 --> 00:06:21,698 Hello, everyone. 151 00:06:21,732 --> 00:06:23,667 Is this thing on? ( Laughing ) 152 00:06:23,701 --> 00:06:25,402 ( Crowd quiets, music stops ) 153 00:06:25,436 --> 00:06:28,272 I'm just kidding. I don't-- I have no thing. 154 00:06:28,306 --> 00:06:31,575 I'm sure you're all wondering what you're doing here 155 00:06:31,609 --> 00:06:34,444 or who you're going to be doing it with. 156 00:06:34,479 --> 00:06:38,081 Boys and girls, this is a mystery party. 157 00:06:38,116 --> 00:06:39,950 And I think we can all agree 158 00:06:39,984 --> 00:06:44,020 that the greatest mystery in this life is love. 159 00:06:44,055 --> 00:06:45,656 ( Crowd murmuring ) 160 00:06:45,690 --> 00:06:48,359 So... that was when the music was supposed to start. 161 00:06:48,393 --> 00:06:50,528 - Cue the music. - ( Music playing ) 162 00:06:50,562 --> 00:06:52,830 - There we go. - ♪ Just a look was all it took ♪ 163 00:06:52,864 --> 00:06:55,733 ♪ suddenly I'm on the hook ♪ 164 00:06:55,767 --> 00:06:58,803 ♪ it's ma-a-a-gic ♪ 165 00:06:58,837 --> 00:07:01,372 - ♪ follow you and follow me... ♪ - Hey. 166 00:07:01,406 --> 00:07:03,507 ♪ Everybody else can see... ♪ 167 00:07:03,542 --> 00:07:05,743 Oh, my God. 168 00:07:05,778 --> 00:07:07,512 Oh, my God, that's Thomas-John. 169 00:07:07,546 --> 00:07:10,082 That's the guy that tried to have a three-way with me and Jessa. 170 00:07:10,116 --> 00:07:11,883 What's happening? 171 00:07:11,918 --> 00:07:14,152 ♪ It's not that I'm sticking with you ♪ 172 00:07:14,187 --> 00:07:17,322 ♪ nobody makes me feel better... ♪ 173 00:07:17,356 --> 00:07:19,825 ( Crowd gasping ) 174 00:07:21,027 --> 00:07:23,228 ♪ Let the whole world pass me by ♪ 175 00:07:23,262 --> 00:07:25,697 ♪ take me to the countryside... ♪ 176 00:07:25,731 --> 00:07:28,500 - Dude, if I didn't know any better... - Oh, my God. 177 00:07:28,534 --> 00:07:29,935 I think she's getting married. 178 00:07:29,969 --> 00:07:32,003 She's not getting married. 179 00:07:32,038 --> 00:07:34,672 As some of you may have already guessed, 180 00:07:34,707 --> 00:07:37,442 - we're getting married. - We are. 181 00:07:37,476 --> 00:07:40,578 ( Crowd cheering ) 182 00:07:40,612 --> 00:07:43,314 Shh, shh, shh, shh. 183 00:07:44,516 --> 00:07:45,950 - Can you please hold the-- - Thank you. 184 00:07:45,984 --> 00:07:47,685 - ( Slaps ) - Ow. ( Laughs ) 185 00:07:51,389 --> 00:07:53,490 Hi. 186 00:07:53,525 --> 00:07:55,859 Jessa, 187 00:07:55,894 --> 00:07:58,763 the first night we met, truthfully, 188 00:07:58,797 --> 00:08:01,565 I thought that we were gonna have a threesome 189 00:08:01,600 --> 00:08:03,100 with your friend Marnie. 190 00:08:03,134 --> 00:08:04,735 What's up, Marnie? 191 00:08:05,970 --> 00:08:08,504 But we didn't do that. 192 00:08:08,539 --> 00:08:11,673 When you left my house that night, 193 00:08:11,708 --> 00:08:14,809 I felt more energized than I had for years. 194 00:08:14,843 --> 00:08:17,178 I thought to myself 195 00:08:17,212 --> 00:08:19,279 that if I ever saw that crazy bitch again, 196 00:08:19,314 --> 00:08:21,715 I would make her my fuckin' wife. 197 00:08:23,151 --> 00:08:24,585 - ( Crowd cheering ) - Man: All right! 198 00:08:24,619 --> 00:08:26,653 Woman: Whoo! Ow! 199 00:08:26,687 --> 00:08:29,089 - Woman #2: Yeah, man! - Woman #3: All right! 200 00:08:29,124 --> 00:08:31,358 I wore white. 201 00:08:31,392 --> 00:08:33,127 What? 202 00:08:33,161 --> 00:08:36,096 I wore white to her wedding. 203 00:08:36,130 --> 00:08:41,001 I wore white because how could I have known? 204 00:08:41,035 --> 00:08:43,069 Because nobody told me. 205 00:08:43,103 --> 00:08:45,271 Well, yeah, it's a surprise wedding. 206 00:08:45,305 --> 00:08:50,743 Thomas-John, when you came to my house with flowers, 207 00:08:50,778 --> 00:08:54,246 I was prepared to call the special victims unit. 208 00:08:54,281 --> 00:08:55,714 - ( Laughter ) - Woman: Yeah! 209 00:08:55,749 --> 00:08:58,517 Not only did I find you very creepy, 210 00:08:58,552 --> 00:09:01,587 but I found you also really boring. 211 00:09:01,621 --> 00:09:04,990 You are. You're boring. 212 00:09:05,025 --> 00:09:06,993 ( Laughter ) 213 00:09:07,027 --> 00:09:10,029 But for some reason, I agreed to have dinner with you. 214 00:09:10,064 --> 00:09:13,199 And you asked to move tables twice 215 00:09:13,233 --> 00:09:15,502 - and I was even more revolted. - ( Laughs ) 216 00:09:15,536 --> 00:09:19,239 Then you started talking about what you did, 217 00:09:19,274 --> 00:09:22,242 about travel and finance, 218 00:09:22,276 --> 00:09:23,776 and I thought, "This man's brilliant 219 00:09:23,811 --> 00:09:26,045 in a way that I have never known." 220 00:09:26,079 --> 00:09:27,613 Thank you. 221 00:09:27,647 --> 00:09:33,385 I appreciate your adventurous spirit, 222 00:09:33,420 --> 00:09:36,588 your desire to learn, 223 00:09:36,622 --> 00:09:39,457 and everything you don't know about. 224 00:09:39,492 --> 00:09:41,926 - ( Laughter ) - Yeah? 225 00:09:41,961 --> 00:09:43,796 It's a positive. 226 00:09:43,830 --> 00:09:45,431 - Shit. - I know. 227 00:09:45,466 --> 00:09:47,667 I love you. 228 00:09:48,903 --> 00:09:50,704 Are you okay? 229 00:09:50,739 --> 00:09:52,706 I'm very moved. 230 00:09:52,741 --> 00:09:56,211 - You are? - Yeah. 231 00:09:56,245 --> 00:09:59,648 - People finding each other, taking shelter. - Both: I love you! 232 00:09:59,683 --> 00:10:01,550 I'm very moved. 233 00:10:01,584 --> 00:10:03,685 But they just met, like, two weeks ago. 234 00:10:05,355 --> 00:10:07,689 Time is a rubber band. 235 00:10:08,958 --> 00:10:11,560 Thadd: And now with the power vested in me 236 00:10:11,594 --> 00:10:15,063 - by a website that I found on the Internet... - ( Laughter ) 237 00:10:15,097 --> 00:10:17,265 ...I now pronounce you man and wife. 238 00:10:17,299 --> 00:10:18,566 Ahh! 239 00:10:18,601 --> 00:10:21,202 You may kiss the bride. 240 00:10:21,237 --> 00:10:23,371 Free the bird. 241 00:10:29,011 --> 00:10:31,546 - Women: Aw. - ( Crowd cheering ) 242 00:10:38,587 --> 00:10:40,522 - Is it garter time? - No. 243 00:10:40,556 --> 00:10:42,491 - No. - Oh, come on, please! 244 00:10:42,525 --> 00:10:44,826 - Oh, fuck it. - Oh, boy. 245 00:10:44,860 --> 00:10:47,562 Your dreams are not what you thought they'd be. 246 00:10:47,596 --> 00:10:50,131 Woman: Whoo-hoo! 247 00:10:50,166 --> 00:10:52,567 All right, everybody, let's fuckin' cork it out! 248 00:10:52,602 --> 00:10:54,269 - Aah! - Whoo! 249 00:10:54,304 --> 00:10:55,804 ♪ I can't even lie ♪ 250 00:10:55,839 --> 00:10:57,473 ♪ I fuck better when I'm drinkin' ♪ 251 00:10:57,507 --> 00:10:59,375 - Ohhh, shit! - ♪ Ride dick like a pro ♪ 252 00:10:59,410 --> 00:11:01,211 ♪ throw the pussy like I'm famous ♪ 253 00:11:01,245 --> 00:11:04,180 ♪ pussy feels so good, feel like the rubber off, ain't it? ♪ 254 00:11:04,215 --> 00:11:08,018 ♪ you ain't gotta tell me, I know this pussy be yankin' ♪ 255 00:11:08,052 --> 00:11:11,522 ♪ this pussy be yankin', I know this pussy be yankin' ♪ 256 00:11:11,556 --> 00:11:14,725 ♪ this pussy be yankin', I know this pussy be yankin' ♪ 257 00:11:14,760 --> 00:11:17,829 ♪ this pussy be yankin', I know this pussy be yankin' ♪ 258 00:11:17,863 --> 00:11:21,733 ♪ you ain't gotta tell me, I know this pussy be yankin' ♪ 259 00:11:21,768 --> 00:11:25,270 ♪ this pussy be yankin', I know this pussy be yankin' ♪ 260 00:11:25,304 --> 00:11:27,705 ♪ this pussy be yankin', I know this puss... ♪ 261 00:11:27,739 --> 00:11:29,807 ( Crowd cheering ) 262 00:11:29,841 --> 00:11:31,508 Jessa: I love you. 263 00:11:31,543 --> 00:11:33,043 You're so fucking gross, 264 00:11:33,077 --> 00:11:35,312 lying there on the bathroom floor. 265 00:11:35,346 --> 00:11:37,480 I can't believe you're married. 266 00:11:37,515 --> 00:11:39,950 I mean, I never expected that. 267 00:11:39,984 --> 00:11:43,319 Not that I know what to expect from you, but I did not expect that. 268 00:11:43,353 --> 00:11:44,987 You don't think I'm crazy. 269 00:11:45,022 --> 00:11:48,324 I don't think you're crazy. I mean, I think it's fast. 270 00:11:48,359 --> 00:11:49,959 Maybe I'm crazy. 271 00:11:49,993 --> 00:11:53,762 Maybe I am, but, fuck, Hannah, I have never been this happy. 272 00:11:53,797 --> 00:11:56,231 I feel like I'm sleeping in a rosebud. 273 00:11:56,266 --> 00:11:58,399 I'm so gone on this man. 274 00:11:58,434 --> 00:12:00,669 But, like, how can you be so sure about something like that? 275 00:12:00,703 --> 00:12:02,371 Like, Adam wants to move in with me 276 00:12:02,405 --> 00:12:04,473 and I can't even tell if that's good or bad. 277 00:12:04,508 --> 00:12:06,642 Like, you feel like a real adult now? 278 00:12:06,677 --> 00:12:09,646 Mm... 279 00:12:09,680 --> 00:12:10,614 Yeah. 280 00:12:10,648 --> 00:12:12,282 ( Laughs ) Kind of. 281 00:12:12,317 --> 00:12:14,285 Thank you. 282 00:12:14,319 --> 00:12:16,387 Elijah. 283 00:12:16,422 --> 00:12:18,456 Hi, JLo at the Grammys. 284 00:12:18,491 --> 00:12:20,425 ( Sighs ) 285 00:12:20,459 --> 00:12:23,228 You know, I'd really like to put our past behind us 286 00:12:23,262 --> 00:12:25,697 and I hope you find what you're looking for. 287 00:12:28,300 --> 00:12:29,767 ( Huffs ) 288 00:12:29,801 --> 00:12:33,103 All right, everyone, for the grooviest portion of the evening, 289 00:12:33,137 --> 00:12:37,173 please join us outside for their first dance as man and wife-- 290 00:12:37,208 --> 00:12:39,576 Jessa and Thomas-John. 291 00:12:39,610 --> 00:12:41,511 ( Crowd cheering ) 292 00:12:41,545 --> 00:12:43,179 - Do they need us for that? - Yeah. 293 00:12:43,214 --> 00:12:44,848 - They need you for that. - They need me. 294 00:12:44,882 --> 00:12:46,416 I can do it. I can do it. 295 00:12:46,451 --> 00:12:48,719 - No. - Okay. 296 00:12:51,589 --> 00:12:53,157 - All right, that's fine. - I love you. 297 00:12:53,191 --> 00:12:54,592 - Yeah. - I love you. 298 00:12:54,626 --> 00:12:56,560 Thadd: This is gonna be your life from now on. 299 00:12:56,595 --> 00:12:57,495 ( Laughing ) 300 00:12:57,529 --> 00:13:00,431 Come into my arms, Rapunzel. 301 00:13:00,465 --> 00:13:04,368 ( Music playing ) 302 00:13:04,402 --> 00:13:08,305 Thomas-John: This is amazing. I feel so alive. 303 00:13:10,574 --> 00:13:15,144 You're wearing a halo. You're wearing a halo right now. 304 00:13:19,082 --> 00:13:21,650 - ( Slurps ) - Enjoying yourself? 305 00:13:21,685 --> 00:13:23,920 - ( Chuckles ) - Yeah, actually. 306 00:13:23,954 --> 00:13:26,022 Not too much. Don't worry. 307 00:13:26,057 --> 00:13:27,491 Where is Audrey? 308 00:13:27,525 --> 00:13:29,093 She's in Sante Fe. 309 00:13:29,127 --> 00:13:31,195 She's blogging from a tortilla soup contest. 310 00:13:32,264 --> 00:13:33,731 It's not a joke. 311 00:13:33,765 --> 00:13:36,234 I had not laughed about it yet. 312 00:13:36,268 --> 00:13:38,670 No, actually, I've read her blog. 313 00:13:38,704 --> 00:13:40,472 She's a really good writer. 314 00:13:40,506 --> 00:13:42,840 And I like all of her ironic t-shirts. 315 00:13:42,875 --> 00:13:45,343 Of course, I like them unironically. 316 00:13:47,145 --> 00:13:48,479 So, what do-- 317 00:13:48,513 --> 00:13:51,382 - What do people even do at weddings? - ( Sniffs ) 318 00:13:55,185 --> 00:13:57,587 We should just, like, go fuck in the bathroom. 319 00:13:58,989 --> 00:14:00,723 Yeah, totally. 320 00:14:00,757 --> 00:14:03,560 I'll just sit on the sink and you can fuck me really quickly. 321 00:14:03,594 --> 00:14:05,362 Hard, and I'll just cover your mouth 322 00:14:05,396 --> 00:14:06,996 so you don't make any noise. 323 00:14:07,031 --> 00:14:09,666 Yeah, and then I'll, like, turn on the faucet by accident with my ass. 324 00:14:09,700 --> 00:14:11,601 And then we'll come out here and we'll eat some dessert, 325 00:14:11,635 --> 00:14:14,003 and then we'll just, like, wink at each other from across the room. 326 00:14:14,038 --> 00:14:17,207 We should just forget about all of our troubles and go fuck somewhere. 327 00:14:17,241 --> 00:14:19,309 Okay, great. 328 00:14:19,344 --> 00:14:24,080 ( Laughs ) Wait. You're-- you're joking, right? 329 00:14:25,850 --> 00:14:27,250 Yeah, totally. 330 00:14:27,285 --> 00:14:28,585 - Okay. - Totally. 331 00:14:28,619 --> 00:14:30,921 You really had me there. That was-- that was weird. 332 00:14:30,955 --> 00:14:32,757 Oh, no. No, no, no. Yeah, I was joking. 333 00:14:32,791 --> 00:14:36,160 - 'Cause you were joking, right? - Yeah. Yes, I was. 334 00:14:36,195 --> 00:14:37,795 Yeah. 335 00:14:39,564 --> 00:14:41,431 Enjoying yourself? 336 00:14:41,466 --> 00:14:43,233 I don't wanna do this. 337 00:14:43,267 --> 00:14:45,101 No, me neither. 338 00:14:45,136 --> 00:14:46,636 It's a big pet peeve, actually. 339 00:14:46,671 --> 00:14:48,170 People touching as they sway-- 340 00:14:48,205 --> 00:14:50,573 it's very annoying. 341 00:14:50,607 --> 00:14:54,209 No, I love dancing, but I'm really upset. 342 00:14:54,243 --> 00:14:56,277 What's wrong? 343 00:14:56,312 --> 00:14:58,512 It's personal. I can't explain it. 344 00:14:58,547 --> 00:15:00,481 Give it a whirl. 345 00:15:00,515 --> 00:15:02,450 Okay. 346 00:15:02,484 --> 00:15:05,119 Everyone's a dumb whore. 347 00:15:06,255 --> 00:15:07,722 I can hardly stop thinking about you 348 00:15:07,756 --> 00:15:09,123 since the night we met. 349 00:15:09,158 --> 00:15:12,427 - You are the strangest person. - ( Music playing ) 350 00:15:12,462 --> 00:15:17,665 You're just-- you're so-- you're so raw and open. 351 00:15:17,700 --> 00:15:20,768 You vibrate on a very strange frequency. 352 00:15:23,605 --> 00:15:25,573 Are you punking me? 353 00:15:25,607 --> 00:15:27,408 It's very confusing for me, too. 354 00:15:29,711 --> 00:15:31,412 I wanna go home with you. 355 00:15:33,248 --> 00:15:35,483 Tonight. 356 00:15:38,553 --> 00:15:40,188 Fine. 357 00:15:42,391 --> 00:15:44,126 Fine. 358 00:15:44,160 --> 00:15:47,462 Just stay out of my emotional way. 359 00:15:47,496 --> 00:15:48,797 Fine. 360 00:15:50,066 --> 00:15:51,767 See? I'm even fucking better at slow dancing 361 00:15:51,801 --> 00:15:53,402 than I am at fast dancing. 362 00:15:53,437 --> 00:15:55,104 I have an amazing move that I do to this song. 363 00:15:55,139 --> 00:15:56,606 - You wanna see? - Yeah. 364 00:15:56,640 --> 00:15:58,908 ♪ I ain't never gonna shut you out ♪ 365 00:15:58,943 --> 00:16:01,544 ♪ everywhere I'm looking now ♪ 366 00:16:01,579 --> 00:16:03,279 ♪ I'm surrounded by your embrace... ♪ 367 00:16:03,314 --> 00:16:04,914 This is how Beyonce does it in the video. 368 00:16:04,948 --> 00:16:06,849 And then she's like... 369 00:16:06,884 --> 00:16:08,818 And then she's like... 370 00:16:08,853 --> 00:16:10,419 Jesus Christ, kid. 371 00:16:10,454 --> 00:16:12,389 Save your strength. 372 00:16:12,423 --> 00:16:13,890 We're in it for the long haul. 373 00:16:13,924 --> 00:16:16,927 ♪ It's written all over your face ♪ 374 00:16:16,961 --> 00:16:19,562 ♪ baby, I can feel your halo ♪ 375 00:16:19,597 --> 00:16:21,631 ♪ pray it won't fade away ♪ 376 00:16:21,666 --> 00:16:23,767 ♪ I can feel your halo, halo, halo ♪ 377 00:16:23,801 --> 00:16:26,770 ♪ I can see your halo, halo, halo ♪ 378 00:16:26,805 --> 00:16:29,073 ♪ I can feel your halo, halo ♪ 379 00:16:29,108 --> 00:16:32,177 ♪ halo. ♪ 380 00:16:33,713 --> 00:16:35,881 ( Music playing ) 381 00:16:39,486 --> 00:16:41,020 Hannah. 382 00:16:41,054 --> 00:16:43,188 - Hi. Hey. - Hi. Hi. 383 00:16:43,223 --> 00:16:46,225 - You look great. - ( Muffled ) Oh, thank you. 384 00:16:46,259 --> 00:16:50,428 Um, look, I just wanted to say that I-- 385 00:16:50,463 --> 00:16:52,030 I did give you H.P.V. 386 00:16:52,064 --> 00:16:56,801 Um, after we talked, I kind of waded through my sexual history 387 00:16:56,836 --> 00:17:01,507 and Rachel Dusetik absolutely has it. 388 00:17:01,541 --> 00:17:03,608 Oh, my God. Okay, I knew it was her, 389 00:17:03,643 --> 00:17:05,144 'cause that girl wears floral capris 390 00:17:05,178 --> 00:17:06,378 like her hymen's still intact, 391 00:17:06,413 --> 00:17:08,480 but she was such a slut in such a big way. 392 00:17:08,515 --> 00:17:10,116 In a huge way. She used to do this thing 393 00:17:10,150 --> 00:17:11,651 where she would rip the condom off. 394 00:17:11,685 --> 00:17:13,553 - Like... - Fuckin' redheads. 395 00:17:13,587 --> 00:17:15,455 - I know, right? Redheads. - Seriously. 396 00:17:15,489 --> 00:17:17,791 - Crazy. - ( Sighs ) 397 00:17:17,825 --> 00:17:19,393 Please forgive me. 398 00:17:19,427 --> 00:17:20,961 Oh, come on. 399 00:17:20,995 --> 00:17:23,062 - You know, everyone has it. - Right? 400 00:17:23,096 --> 00:17:26,232 Let's just consider it water under... my vagina. 401 00:17:26,266 --> 00:17:27,699 ( Laughs ) 402 00:17:27,734 --> 00:17:28,733 - Honey. - Hi. 403 00:17:28,768 --> 00:17:30,201 Have you seen these petit fours? 404 00:17:30,236 --> 00:17:32,003 I would fuck these petit fours. 405 00:17:32,038 --> 00:17:34,339 Oh, Hannah, this is George. 406 00:17:34,373 --> 00:17:36,774 - George, this is-- this is Hannah. - Hi. Nice to meet you. 407 00:17:36,808 --> 00:17:37,775 - Oh, Hannah! - Yes. 408 00:17:37,809 --> 00:17:39,310 - Ha-- Hannah? - Yes. 409 00:17:39,344 --> 00:17:42,113 - The straw that broke the camel's back? - Yeah. 410 00:17:42,147 --> 00:17:44,582 - She does not look like Camryn Manheim. - Honey. 411 00:17:46,084 --> 00:17:47,919 So are you two, like, living together now? 412 00:17:47,953 --> 00:17:49,954 - Oh, no. - No, no, no. 413 00:17:49,988 --> 00:17:53,759 I wish, but we have to wait till Templeton's graduated. 414 00:17:53,793 --> 00:17:55,461 Yes, Templeton is George's son, 415 00:17:55,495 --> 00:17:57,930 and he's extremely homophobic. 416 00:17:57,964 --> 00:17:59,632 - Wow. - Very hard. 417 00:17:59,667 --> 00:18:01,634 So I've been living in an S.R.O. since I left Bo, 418 00:18:01,668 --> 00:18:03,869 which is an apartment where you share 419 00:18:03,903 --> 00:18:06,271 - a bathroom with-- - Everyone on your floor. 420 00:18:06,306 --> 00:18:09,641 It's like murderers and, like, junkies and girls who huff. 421 00:18:09,675 --> 00:18:11,443 - Like-- - That is awful. 422 00:18:11,477 --> 00:18:13,011 It's not great. 423 00:18:13,045 --> 00:18:15,780 Well, you know, you're in luck 424 00:18:15,814 --> 00:18:18,883 because I actually need a roommate. 425 00:18:18,917 --> 00:18:20,818 Oh! I mean, that would be great. 426 00:18:20,852 --> 00:18:22,786 - Can we do this? - Oy, sounds like kismet. 427 00:18:22,821 --> 00:18:24,289 And you know what? We would have so much fun. 428 00:18:24,323 --> 00:18:26,191 - We both have H.P.V. already. - I know, right? 429 00:18:26,225 --> 00:18:28,093 - We don't have to worry. - That awkward thing's off the table. 430 00:18:28,127 --> 00:18:29,094 - Yeah, right? - Yeah. 431 00:18:29,129 --> 00:18:30,896 - You both have what? - H.P.V. 432 00:18:30,930 --> 00:18:32,931 - What is that? - Human papillomavirus. 433 00:18:32,966 --> 00:18:34,600 Elijah: It's-- you know, it's like that thing. 434 00:18:34,634 --> 00:18:35,701 A sexually transmitted disease. 435 00:18:35,735 --> 00:18:38,270 - Yeah, but for girls. - That he gave me. 436 00:18:38,304 --> 00:18:41,274 You've got it, too, now. 437 00:18:41,308 --> 00:18:44,277 Look, we can discuss this in a-- 438 00:18:45,379 --> 00:18:47,047 He seems great. 439 00:18:47,081 --> 00:18:49,616 I know, right? And rich as fuck. 440 00:18:49,650 --> 00:18:51,785 ( Music playing ) 441 00:18:51,819 --> 00:18:54,488 ♪ When you left my house in the morning... ♪ 442 00:18:54,522 --> 00:18:56,423 Why are you even trying? You hate sweet stuff. 443 00:18:56,457 --> 00:18:58,892 - ( Laughing ) - Hi. 444 00:18:58,927 --> 00:19:00,427 So you don't have to worry. 445 00:19:00,461 --> 00:19:04,063 - About what? - About moving in, because I found someone. 446 00:19:04,098 --> 00:19:06,065 You found someone. 447 00:19:06,100 --> 00:19:08,802 It's gonna sound crazy, but it's Elijah. 448 00:19:08,836 --> 00:19:11,470 And he's moving in next week, so if you felt obligated, don't. 449 00:19:11,505 --> 00:19:14,573 Also, he just told me he's getting certified in Alexander technique, 450 00:19:14,608 --> 00:19:16,075 which is literally the gayest thing 451 00:19:16,109 --> 00:19:17,576 I've ever heard in my entire life. 452 00:19:17,610 --> 00:19:20,312 If you didn't like the idea, why didn't you say so? 453 00:19:20,347 --> 00:19:23,516 No, it's-- you know, I thought you were trying to help and I appreciate it-- 454 00:19:23,550 --> 00:19:25,752 Help? I don't wanna help. 455 00:19:25,786 --> 00:19:27,287 No one does anything 'cause they wanna help. 456 00:19:27,322 --> 00:19:29,890 I was doing it because I love you. 457 00:19:29,924 --> 00:19:32,793 Oh. 458 00:19:32,827 --> 00:19:36,263 Why do you look so surprised? 459 00:19:36,298 --> 00:19:39,267 No, it's just like-- you know, I just didn't think you were into that. 460 00:19:39,301 --> 00:19:42,002 Into what? Love? 461 00:19:42,037 --> 00:19:44,938 No, I just-- you know, I just associate that with, like, Marnie and Charlie 462 00:19:44,973 --> 00:19:46,440 and people starting to talk a lot 463 00:19:46,474 --> 00:19:48,074 about their relationship, you know? 464 00:19:48,109 --> 00:19:50,176 It's like, "My relationship is doing really well right now," 465 00:19:50,211 --> 00:19:52,512 or "I need to work on some aspects of my relationship." 466 00:19:52,546 --> 00:19:54,213 And it's just like, your relationship is not a thing. 467 00:19:54,247 --> 00:19:55,714 Your relationship is not an achievement. 468 00:19:55,749 --> 00:19:57,583 I've got actual things I would like to achieve 469 00:19:57,617 --> 00:19:59,151 before I focus on, like, that. 470 00:19:59,185 --> 00:20:01,220 And you can't achieve those things with me? 471 00:20:01,254 --> 00:20:03,923 No, it's-- it's not that. 472 00:20:03,957 --> 00:20:05,424 It's just-- don't you feel like sometimes 473 00:20:05,459 --> 00:20:06,926 you and I distract each other from 474 00:20:06,960 --> 00:20:08,660 the other stuff that we have going on-- 475 00:20:08,695 --> 00:20:11,430 Okay, I don't wanna flip out on you right now at a surprise wedding. 476 00:20:11,465 --> 00:20:13,732 If you wanna fuck me from behind, at least pull my hair back. 477 00:20:13,767 --> 00:20:15,367 Adam. 478 00:20:15,402 --> 00:20:16,802 Thadd: Excuse me! 479 00:20:16,836 --> 00:20:18,871 Coming through. All right. 480 00:20:18,905 --> 00:20:21,074 Lady with a baby. Look out. 481 00:20:21,108 --> 00:20:24,477 Ladles and gentlebeans, attention. 482 00:20:24,511 --> 00:20:26,612 What's that, tiny Jessa? 483 00:20:26,646 --> 00:20:29,682 - ( Laughter ) - It's cakey time? 484 00:20:29,716 --> 00:20:32,319 - Ha ha ha! - Cakey time. 485 00:20:32,353 --> 00:20:34,921 Is it just me, or is he adorable? 486 00:20:34,955 --> 00:20:37,456 - Are you okay? - I don't know. 487 00:20:37,491 --> 00:20:39,992 Thadd: She gave birth to those cakes. 488 00:20:40,027 --> 00:20:42,762 - ( Laughing ) Aah! - ( Crowd cheering ) 489 00:20:42,797 --> 00:20:45,399 - Hey. What's up, man? - Hey, dickhead. 490 00:20:45,433 --> 00:20:48,436 - Fuck you. - Well, what do we do? 491 00:20:48,470 --> 00:20:50,438 - Oh, we gotta cut it. - Of course. 492 00:20:50,472 --> 00:20:52,106 Oh, my God, it's perfect. 493 00:20:52,141 --> 00:20:54,409 - Yeah, it fucking cost enough. - ( Laughing ) 494 00:20:54,443 --> 00:20:56,745 - You ready, baby? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm ready. 495 00:20:56,779 --> 00:20:59,047 Is this what makes it official? 496 00:20:59,082 --> 00:21:01,350 ( Laughs ) 497 00:21:01,384 --> 00:21:03,352 - Wait! - ( Laughter ) 498 00:21:05,021 --> 00:21:07,290 - Thomas-John: Thadd, you prick. - Thadd: I'm kidding! 499 00:21:07,324 --> 00:21:10,259 - Thomas-John: Fuck you! - ( Laughter ) 500 00:21:14,064 --> 00:21:15,565 Uh! 501 00:21:15,599 --> 00:21:17,467 Crowd: Bye! 502 00:21:17,501 --> 00:21:19,702 Jessa: Thank you. 503 00:21:23,641 --> 00:21:25,275 Yo! 504 00:21:31,016 --> 00:21:33,184 Why are you so mad at me? 505 00:21:33,218 --> 00:21:36,554 I brought you cake, so even if you don't like sweet stuff, it's amazing-- 506 00:21:36,588 --> 00:21:40,090 You love yourself so much. So why is it so crazy that someone else would, too? 507 00:21:40,125 --> 00:21:42,193 I don't love myself. 508 00:21:42,227 --> 00:21:44,161 You're the fucking worst, you know that? 509 00:21:44,196 --> 00:21:45,830 Because you think you're not pretty 510 00:21:45,864 --> 00:21:47,765 and you're not a good writer and you're not a good friend. 511 00:21:47,800 --> 00:21:52,503 Well, you are pretty and you are a good writer and you are a good friend. 512 00:21:52,537 --> 00:21:54,805 Um, thank you. 513 00:21:54,839 --> 00:21:56,373 Is this the game? 514 00:21:56,408 --> 00:21:58,609 You chase me like I'm the fucking Beatles for six months, 515 00:21:58,643 --> 00:22:01,345 and then I finally get comfortable and you shrug? 516 00:22:03,615 --> 00:22:05,349 What the fuck is wrong with you?! 517 00:22:06,485 --> 00:22:08,319 I'm scared, okay? 518 00:22:08,354 --> 00:22:10,322 I'm really scared all the time. 519 00:22:10,356 --> 00:22:12,190 I'm, like, very scared all the time. 520 00:22:12,225 --> 00:22:14,893 Join the fucking club. 521 00:22:14,927 --> 00:22:17,930 No, because I'm more scared than most people are 522 00:22:17,964 --> 00:22:19,498 when they say that they're scared. 523 00:22:19,532 --> 00:22:21,867 I'm like the most scared person who's alive. 524 00:22:21,901 --> 00:22:24,236 Well, you don't have the right to be! 525 00:22:24,270 --> 00:22:29,207 I told you once I commit to something, I really fucking commit! 526 00:22:29,241 --> 00:22:30,709 You asked for this! 527 00:22:30,743 --> 00:22:32,911 And now you're being a fucking bitch. 528 00:22:32,945 --> 00:22:35,847 Adam, come on, okay? 529 00:22:35,882 --> 00:22:37,282 You're scared. 530 00:22:37,316 --> 00:22:39,250 I'm looking at you. I know you're scared. 531 00:22:39,284 --> 00:22:40,918 You're acting like you're not, but you are. 532 00:22:40,953 --> 00:22:42,921 I know you now. We've been doing this for a while. 533 00:22:42,955 --> 00:22:44,189 - I know you now. - Stop, stop. 534 00:22:44,223 --> 00:22:45,624 You don't know me. 535 00:22:45,658 --> 00:22:47,192 You don't know shit about me. 536 00:22:47,226 --> 00:22:49,461 - ( Horn blares ) - Get out of the street! 537 00:22:49,496 --> 00:22:51,430 You don't know me and you don't know yourself. 538 00:22:51,465 --> 00:22:54,434 You think because you're, what, 11 pounds overweight, you know struggle? 539 00:22:54,468 --> 00:22:58,638 I am 13 pounds overweight and it has been awful for me my whole life! 540 00:22:58,673 --> 00:23:00,107 Holy fuckin' shit! 541 00:23:00,141 --> 00:23:02,810 Here's the world's smallest, tiny violin 542 00:23:02,844 --> 00:23:04,678 playing "My Heart Bleeds For You." 543 00:23:04,713 --> 00:23:07,214 Fuck you! You don't know struggle. 544 00:23:07,248 --> 00:23:09,717 I'm a beautiful fucking mystery to you. 545 00:23:09,751 --> 00:23:12,287 ( Screams ) No! 546 00:23:12,321 --> 00:23:14,422 Fuck! 547 00:23:16,359 --> 00:23:19,261 Hey there. Nice work. 548 00:23:19,295 --> 00:23:22,330 Yeah, well, she kind of threw it at me, but thank you. 549 00:23:22,364 --> 00:23:26,600 Yeah. I mean, a girl like you doesn't exactly need a bouquet. 550 00:23:26,635 --> 00:23:28,502 Why don't you pick on someone your own size? 551 00:23:28,537 --> 00:23:31,071 - ( Snickers ) - That was dumb. 552 00:23:31,106 --> 00:23:33,273 Oh, God. 553 00:23:33,308 --> 00:23:35,209 - Is this party really over? - I know. 554 00:23:35,243 --> 00:23:37,411 - I was just getting started. - Seriously. 555 00:23:37,445 --> 00:23:39,446 The night is young. 556 00:23:39,480 --> 00:23:42,949 But, I mean, you probably have someplace to be. 557 00:23:42,984 --> 00:23:45,052 You'd be surprised. 558 00:23:47,455 --> 00:23:48,755 I can't stop. 559 00:23:48,790 --> 00:23:50,857 - Oh, you're just going for it, huh? - Mm-hmm. 560 00:23:50,892 --> 00:23:52,827 I think I just fell in love. 561 00:23:52,861 --> 00:23:55,163 - ( Mumbles ) Really? - A little bit. 562 00:23:56,866 --> 00:23:58,133 You look beautiful. 563 00:23:58,167 --> 00:24:00,302 I think some cake just went in my cleavage. 564 00:24:00,336 --> 00:24:03,471 I'm not gonna look, because that would not be gentlemanly. 565 00:24:03,505 --> 00:24:05,807 Would it be-- although, helping would be-- 566 00:24:05,841 --> 00:24:07,775 I'd like you to help. 567 00:24:07,810 --> 00:24:10,178 That looks awesome. I'd like to go there... 568 00:24:13,416 --> 00:24:15,317 Someday. 569 00:24:15,351 --> 00:24:17,952 Man, I am not good at this. 570 00:24:17,987 --> 00:24:20,187 I didn't mean to be so forward. 571 00:24:22,057 --> 00:24:25,226 ( Music playing ) 572 00:24:34,169 --> 00:24:36,738 Shoshanna: It doesn't hurt. 573 00:24:36,772 --> 00:24:40,641 Well, good, because I haven't done anything yet. 574 00:24:40,675 --> 00:24:42,843 ( Softly ) Right. 575 00:24:46,281 --> 00:24:50,483 My-- my aunt says that it kind of feels like scratching a sunburn. 576 00:24:51,419 --> 00:24:53,553 Okay. 577 00:24:57,925 --> 00:24:59,958 I know you hate virgins. 578 00:24:59,993 --> 00:25:01,993 You totally hate virgins. You totally lied to me. 579 00:25:02,028 --> 00:25:03,595 - You hate me so much. - No-- 580 00:25:03,629 --> 00:25:05,263 You totally lied about liking me. 581 00:25:05,298 --> 00:25:07,365 - You don't like me at all. - Shh. It's not that at all, okay? 582 00:25:07,400 --> 00:25:09,601 It's not that. It's just-- ( Sighs ) 583 00:25:09,636 --> 00:25:12,738 It just occurred to me, you know, that-- 584 00:25:12,772 --> 00:25:16,842 you know, you've never done it before, 585 00:25:16,876 --> 00:25:20,212 and, thusly, I am teaching you how it's done. 586 00:25:20,246 --> 00:25:22,515 And, you know, that's a lot of power, 587 00:25:22,549 --> 00:25:25,051 which I don't know if I deserve. 588 00:25:26,787 --> 00:25:28,855 Okay. 589 00:25:28,889 --> 00:25:32,326 But I probably do. 590 00:25:32,360 --> 00:25:34,662 Hannah: I think he has a concussion. 591 00:25:34,697 --> 00:25:37,165 I wish I had a fucking concussion. 592 00:25:37,199 --> 00:25:38,567 No, no. 593 00:25:38,601 --> 00:25:40,870 - Family only, right? Family only? - E.M.T.: Yeah. 594 00:25:40,904 --> 00:25:43,205 Oh, sorry, family only. You're not my fucking family. 595 00:25:43,239 --> 00:25:45,541 Adam, I'm coming with you. 596 00:25:45,575 --> 00:25:48,044 - Adam! Adam! - Don't let her in here. She's a monster. 597 00:25:48,078 --> 00:25:50,312 - Adam! - ( Siren wailing ) 598 00:26:13,970 --> 00:26:18,540 ( P.A. chatter ) 599 00:27:25,873 --> 00:27:29,042 ( Women chattering ) 600 00:27:30,745 --> 00:27:33,615 - Excuse me? - Woman: Whose attitude? 601 00:27:33,649 --> 00:27:35,951 - Where am I? - ( Women laugh ) 602 00:27:35,985 --> 00:27:38,354 - No, she didn't. - Are you serious? 603 00:27:38,388 --> 00:27:40,656 - Are you serious right now? - You're in heaven. 604 00:27:40,691 --> 00:27:42,124 ( Women laugh ) 605 00:27:42,159 --> 00:27:43,959 - You're in La La Land. - You're in fuckin' heaven. 606 00:27:43,994 --> 00:27:47,196 - ( Vocalizing ) - Welcome to heaven. 607 00:27:47,230 --> 00:27:49,431 Has she got a green belt on or am I tweakin'? 608 00:27:49,465 --> 00:27:52,700 ( Conversation continues indistinctly ) 609 00:28:04,846 --> 00:28:07,948 ( Seagulls screeching ) 610 00:28:30,504 --> 00:28:33,740 ( Seagulls screeching, waves crashing ) 611 00:28:53,928 --> 00:29:01,928 Sync & corrections by honeybunny www.MY-SUBS.com 612 00:29:15,919 --> 00:29:20,723 ♪ Bombs bursting in air ♪ 613 00:29:23,193 --> 00:29:27,897 ♪ hazy from rocket's red glare ♪ 614 00:29:30,501 --> 00:29:34,536 ♪ all on your own ♪ 615 00:29:34,571 --> 00:29:38,206 ♪ on your way anywhere ♪ 616 00:29:41,111 --> 00:29:46,814 ♪ love, just in case you've not heard ♪ 617 00:29:46,848 --> 00:29:49,950 ♪ it's been run ragged ♪ 618 00:29:49,985 --> 00:29:55,855 ♪ a ghost of a word ♪ 619 00:29:55,889 --> 00:29:59,459 ♪ but hope kind of stuck ♪ 620 00:29:59,493 --> 00:30:03,663 ♪ and with any luck ♪ 621 00:30:03,697 --> 00:30:07,434 ♪ maybe next summer ♪ 622 00:30:07,469 --> 00:30:10,871 ♪ maybe by fall ♪ 623 00:30:10,906 --> 00:30:13,307 ♪ well, if not then ♪ 624 00:30:13,342 --> 00:30:17,246 ♪ I am sure you'll recall ♪ 625 00:30:17,280 --> 00:30:20,916 ♪ that our gloomy December ♪ 626 00:30:20,951 --> 00:30:25,187 ♪ will brighten by may ♪ 627 00:30:25,222 --> 00:30:28,390 ♪ and you're on your way. ♪ 47926

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