Original subtitles

I've served a lot of masters throughout history.

Now I want to go back home where I can be free.

Then you come along with the opal in your hand.

Now your every wish is my command. That's right.

Genie, genie from down under.

Make my wish come true.

Dream on.

Teeny, teeny, from down under.

I wish you'd do what I want you to.

Oh, yeah, all right.

Teeny, from down under.

Dad, we're free!

It's snowing.

Minus three outside.

Perfect reason to wish up a coat like this.

Purely functional, of course. An absolute essential during the English

Of course, Mummy doesn't approve.

She's gone all environmentalist. You mean she doesn't think animals should

just so you can look good?

Well, look, I'm all for save the forest, recycle the whales and keep the ozone

layer in the ground, but I think Mummy's taking it a bit far when she attends

public meetings, signs petitions and becomes a revolutionary.

Darling! Here she comes!

Oh, um, I wish I was wearing something vegetarian.

Darling, we're...

Yes. No!

What? An environmental issue?

Ladies and gentlemen, we are now entering the old British nuclear testing

No, no, no, no.

It is vile and disgusting.

And being as I'm committed to all things enviro and mental, I say we check out

the site.

And get the party government to clown out.

Come on, please. There's nothing.

I'm only doing what any other deeply committed eco -warrior would do.

Hey, Ben.

Don't you wish your mum had something to cool herself off with? Oh, yes, please.

I suppose so.

What have we got here?

Oh, thank you, Bruce.

Honestly,

I don't know why you protesters are always complaining.

I think the effects of radiation has been blown up out of all proportions.

So, um, what do you make of that, then?

Okay, so it's, uh, glowing a little.

At least we won't run over it in the dark.

Here at Ground Zero, Conrad and I will be testing for radiation with these

delicate, sensitive...

See? These are delicate, sensitive pieces of equipment, so don't breathe

heavily.

And if we find any contamination, ooh, I'm going to be so mad.

Don't leave the way.

Darlene, we'll follow. Come on this way.

Hey,

Conrad, that looks like a very expensive machine.

Sure is, Michael. I'd have spared no expense in this.

So I've got to be, like, really careful.

Sorry about that. I mean, I'm such a butterfingers. I apologize.

I really mean it. I am sorry.

You know, it's a good year, and I apologize for doing that. I really am

But all right. All right.

The von Meister opal was stolen from us, and now, finally, I stole it back.

Hey, how green can you get? I'm recycling opals.

I didn't steal it. I found it. He found it. I found it fair and square. It's

mine. Yeah, it's his.

He brought the apple in your hand. Your every wish is my command.

What?

He brought the apple in your hand. Your every wish is my command.

I wish you'd speak up more clearly.

Uh -oh. He's on to us, Dad.

You've rubbed the opal in your hand. Your every wish is my command.

You want to eat it?

Not quite.

I wish it'd be clearer still.

Oh.

Sorry, Penn.

Didn't you master?

Master von Meister.

Catchy, isn't it, eh?

So, um, what are you going to do now?

Oh, I wish I knew.

I know.

I wish you'd rack off back to England.

Top thinking, mate.

Well, she does do that. She's got it coming.

England is such a cold, wet, miserable, snobby dump of a place.

I tell you what, if I was king of England, I'd make some changes quick

let me tell you.

Huh? Are you thinking what I'm thinking?

This is all your fault, mummy. If you hadn't been such a radical, I wouldn't

have lost my opal. I don't know why you can't just leave things as they are.

And now we're crossing live to Buckingham Pallet for a royal decree

monarch, King Otto I.

G'day, loyal subjects.

Listen, since I've gotten onto this ruling caper, I've been checking out my

domain, and I'm here to tell you things are crook. But don't panic, not to

worry. I'll be making a few changes and fixing things up. For starters, Big Ben

goes digital.

Otto, you...

Easy to read, isn't it? And it's got a smooth setting.

Now, Power Bridge.

That's got to take the cake for sheer ugliness.

Well, don't worry, I'm going to fix it. I'm going to make it look the way a

bridge ought to look. I'm going to turn an eyesore into an icon.

Sorry to barge in, I've just come to tell you that some of the chaps and I

formed a secret resistance movement support group based in Sherwood Forest.

Now, Nelson's column becomes Otto's column.

Oh, this is Britain's darkest hour. We must revolt against this tyrant.

I'll be with the many chaps in green in the forum, in the top secret location

where they will never find us.

If you want to contact me, you can call on my mobile, my pager and my email.

I have to get my opal back. I've decided to give Buckhouse the flick and move my

suit of power to the country.

I hope he doesn't mean...

I know it's a great honour for you.

I'm not sure I want you to move in.

Exactly. You can't just barge in. I haven't changed the sheets.

I wish you'd change your attitude.

Please, do come in.

Dirty seats shouldn't be a problem for you.

I know what you think about Brutus, but I'm going to have to do something about

this.

I want to have a word with you.

I wish they'd all do as I asked.

Come on. Yes, if you want. Try and get what? Marry Captain Green.

But they're yucky. Darling, you're a loony hoop.

Pardon your highness.

Right. Now, to start it.

I've got a big plan.

I want to see all sorts of improvements.

Start.

Penelope

You'll find our secret hideout.

I just followed my nose.

I told you not to use so much garlic.

One of my best men.

Friar Tuck.

Hello. And that's our little John.

And that's our big John coming out there, little John.

And this is England's only home?

Yeah. We're a keen, green, merry machine.

Come and see the nerve sensor.

At ease, everybody.

Oh, try not to stare.

Fate has dealt her rather a cruel blow. Pretend you don't notice.

Mrs. Simpson, this is Penelope Townes.

Hello.

Once I was proud of my good looks and healthy glow.

But then Otto the Horrible came to power and my life was in ruins.

I'm shunned wherever I go.

Oh, how... Who?

That's why I volunteered to join the Merry Chaps in Green.

How bold.

I've told Commander Bubbles that I'd volunteer for any mission, risk any

resist any torture.

How... excessive.

Just so long as we can rid the world of Arthur the Repulsed.

Arthur the Horrible.

Whatever. Don't worry, Mr. Tintin. You'll get your chance.

Sorry, Commander.

Bubbles, you have to help us. King Otto has taken over Town's Hall. If I can get

the Oval back, I think... Calls for drastic action.

Oh, what are you going to do?

We'll hit him with everything we've got.

First of all, we'll form a committee, and they will formulate the critical

Then we'll divide into subcommittees, and they will produce the necessary

feasibility statements.

And then we'll hit him with our big gun.

An armed attack?

Better still, we'll send in the lawyers.

Perhaps we should save that as a last resort.

I see what I can do from the inside.

Inside? Good thinking, Penelope. You could be a kind of undercover chap.

All right.

If you need help, call us on the chat slide. And I promise we'll be right

with the first available operator.

Good luck.

Thank you, Bubbles.

If only I had more chats like her.

Otto wants it cleaned up and open to the public as a national treasure.

Why don't you run away and join Bubbles in the forest?

We've thought about it, but it was Otto's wish that we stay with Unimog.

What a monster.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, listen.

What about them shears, eh?

Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

What? Now, you listen to me, pal.

A flick day of the shears is a little furler of a national anthem.

Yeah? Well, I wish you'd just shut up and leave me alone.

I wish we'd all just shut up and stop drinking.

I am King Otto the Beauty.

But I'm only human. I give and I give.

But they are never satisfied.

What I need is someone to share the load.

Prince Conrad at your service.

Thanks, mate, but what I need is a wife.

That wouldn't be part of the service.

The merry chap's in green. How can I be of assistance?

Are you sure Mrs. Simpson can be trusted?

Of course.

She may be Australia, but she's all chapped through and through.

Good. I've got a plan.

Great. I'll put it before the plans committee and we'll do a feasibility

No time for that, Bubbles.

Penelope, for you.

Oh.

Hello? Mrs. Simpson?

Yes?

I have a mission for you. It's very, very dangerous, but if it succeeds, we

might just get rid of Otto.

I'll do it. Are you sure? It's virtually a suicide mission.

There's a chance you may not be coming back.

I'm ready.

Bruce, you know what I need?

Yeah, but I better not say.

What I need is a message.

Someone to love and understand me.

I mean, is that accent too much?

Probably. Huh? I know someone who'd make a perfect wife for you, King Otto.

Of course.

I know who you mean.

Ha, ha, ha.

Didy. Yeah, we're made for each other.

Oh, no, I wasn't... I wish Didy was here right now.

Ha, ha, ha.

Didy -do -da -day. Otto, I... I really must protest. This is your lucky day.

I have chosen you to be my queen.

How do you feel about getting hitched?

I'd rather swallow camel droppings than marry you.

I'd rather be squashed to death by a boa constrictor with bad breath.

You can't say no to the king.

Brucie, I can feel a wish coming over.

Well, you could do that on her, but wouldn't you rather a queen had truly

you for who you are?

That'd be one sad woman. Yeah, she wouldn't have a sense of smell either.

King Otto is not happy.

Right, chuck her in the dungeon till she learns to love me. And get rid of them

stirrers. Chuck them in the dungeon too.

That is my wish.

That's my wish.

Oh, well.

Listen to Grumble.

I know the perfect woman for you, Your Highness, and she's not my mother. Yeah,

yeah.

You're all right, then. I wish I could meet this perfect woman.

How do you do, Your Highness?

Oh, you are so gorgeous.

You look so familiar.

I just love it for the sight.

Do you want to become my queen?

What do you reckon?

I'll give it a go.

Ah, gross.

Hey, what's your name?

My name's Wallace, but my friends call me Wal.

From now on, you're going to be my little Wally.

Is that what they call true love?

Not the way I imagined it.

It kind of makes you feel sick, doesn't it?

For top secret attack group inquiries, press 5.

Guilty.

Hello. Attack bubbles. I repeat, attack.

Watch your fidelity.

Confirm. Attack goes.

This is it.

Now is the time for all good shepherds to come to the aid of the country.

I could give you the moon and the stars, but they would

pile their own significance next to your beauty.

Howdy ho!

What do you want, you little...

I'm sorry to say that you and your lady love can never be married.

A British monarch cannot marry a divorcee from Australia.

I'm sorry, sweetheart.

I just didn't know how to tell you.

Look, you're married.

You could always advocate.

What?

She means resign.

Come off it. As if he's going to give up being king for that.

I don't know, Conrad. I feel really strongly about my little Wally.

Oh, and I feel very strongly about you too, Otter. The Lord is very clear on

this point. He has no choice.

It's in the Constitution, section 336, paragraph 85. Oh, it's all right. It's

worth it in a day or possibly be.

Here we are.

Muscle grumble.

Oh, what a choice to have to make, my kingdom or the woman I love.

Do you mean you'd give it all up for me?

I've never had to make a decision like this before.

Of course, I've never been in love like this before.

Mate, you know, she's just a chick.

Conrad, she is not just a chick. She's a woman.

She's all woman.

Uncle, she's like two women.

Oh, this is so difficult.

matter with you. The answer's obvious.

What is it? What?

Oh,

I knew this wouldn't work.

There's only one way to beat a tyrant.

The way the English have always defeated tyrants.

With action.

With drink.

With typical English pluck and spit.

An Englishman will never be a slave.

Not as long as we can fight to the last breath.

Bruce, the dungeon is too good for this twerp.

What's the name of them things you put your hands in and your head in and that

little bit comes down and clunk and you look like a real dork? Uh, stocks, mate.

Yeah. That's what I wish for snooty little Bonopoli here. Stock her up a

just over there.

You can humiliate me, but you'll never break my spirit.

You know, Bruce, I wish I had a tomato.

Let's see now.

Humiliate. I can do that.

There. There you go. I'm a natural.

I reckon I've come up with a new national pastime, eh?

You'll pay for this, you unspeakable vermin.

That's king unspeakable vermin to you.

Your Majesty.

But enough fun.

I've made my mind up.

I'm going to chuck it in.

For love.

Can I have a tomato first, mate?

What? Well, I mean, if that's it at Cisernotto, then you could wish that you

were already married.

Spot on for thinking, Brady.

It was the most beautiful ceremony.

Oh.

I just wanted it to be real, real special.

Just a wonderful memory.

You know, Otto, we haven't even kissed yet.

Oh, no.

She actually likes him. She's ten.

Won't you just pack her up, my little chicken dumpling?

What about all those brains?

And that's the bravest woman I've ever seen.

Oh!

Are you all right?

Looking for this?

Back off.

Penelope?

work to do.

Sue, rain or not, the horrible is over.

Yes. Oh, we've come to free you.

What you're doing, Sue, is getting rather close, isn't it? Yes.

Some of us are beginning to grumble just a little bit.

I wish we were back to where this all started.

Oh,

Conrad, that looks like a very expensive machine.

Sure is, Pen. Uncle, what I've spared no expense, but, you know, I've got to be

very careful. Oh, sir!

Sorry about that. I mean, I'm such a butterfingers. I apologise.

I really mean it. I am sorry. Just, you know, just a comment here.

Um,

uh, yeah.

Sorry.

This is yours, I believe.

Oh, oh, thank you. You inferior.

What are you planning?

Something wrong.

I told you this was a stupid idea. It was never going to work.

It was your idea.

Doesn't matter whether you're big, small, or even look like Otto.

Of course it helps if you have a magic opal.

That really can be revolutionary.

I'm the genie. You're the master.

That's right.

I'm the master.

You're my genie. You belong to me. Yes.

I've served a lot of masters throughout history.

Now I want to go back home where I can be free.

Then you come along with the opal in your hand.

Now your every wish is my command. That's right.

Genie, genie, from down under.

Make my wish come true.

Ream on.

Genie, genie, from down...

Don't you two?

Oh, yeah, all right.