Original subtitles

There's... There's no loo roll!

There's no loo roll!

Didn't you order any?

SHE SIGHS

Lisa!

There's no bloody loo roll!

Lisa!

I thought we had some in the cupboard.

TYRES SCREECH

Jesus! Oh, Jesus Christ.

HORN BEEPS

Wait.

HORN BEEPS

I've got tea all over me!

- What are you doing? - Yeah, yeah,

I've got burning hot tea all over my hand!

Come on, move.

HORNS BEEP

- Get back in your car! - No, he pulled out!

He's not moving.

SHOUTING, HORNS BEEPING

Come on, let's go!

Get in your car!

You shouldn't be holding a cup of tea while driving.

Uh, you pulled out!

HORN BEEPS

Oh, my God are you actually kidding me?!

Where are you going?

They say it'll brighten up so...

- Everything crossed. - Yes!

It's been such a long time since we had some sun.

Oh, yeah it's been unbearable.

- Sorry, going on about the weather. - HE LAUGHS

I've been in this country too long!

Where are you?

See if you can work it out.

What are you doing?

I'm flying a kite.

Get out of bed. Come on. Your dinner's ready.

I'm all right.

You can't just lie in bed.

Oh is that what I'm doing?

Sorry. I'm such a lazybones.

Fucking come on!

- What the fuck are you doing?! - Just come and have your dinner!

It'll burn my mouth!

Well, you can fucking blow on it then, can't you!

I spent all that time...

- You opened a jar! - ..cooking! And now...

- Now you're just... - You opened a jar!

Don't try and pretend you've been slaving away in the kitchen.

- Just come and have your dinner! - Oh, my God what's wrong with you?!

Come on!

HE SIGHS

Fuck's sake!

INDISTINCT CONVERSATION

Stephen?

Stephen?

SHE SIGHS

Ow!

INDISTINCT CONVERSATION

- Hey. - This is...great.

- I mean, that sofa... - I'll just pop up and...

I'll send someone down for you.

Fantastic. Thank you.

Great set up you've got here.

What a view!

Wow, amazing.

No, it's, uh... It's great to see it at last.

Thanks for inviting me.

I just... I told work I had a family emergency

and they were like, "Go, go," so... Here?

Yeah, they were like, "Go, go. Family over everything," so...

Yeah, they'll believe anything.

I'm pregnant,

you're the father, and I'm leaving you.

Heh! Sorry?

I'm pregnant, you're the father, and I'm leaving you.

I thought I should tell you to your face.

What are you doing?

- I'm pregnant, you're the father... - All right. Don't say it again.

I appreciate the time that you've taken to come here this afternoon.

Can you stop talking like a robot?

You're like, "I appreciate this, I appreciate that."

Ha! It's hilarious.

Uh, you were on the pill.

Were you on the pill or weren't you on the pill?

You never asked me if I was on the pill.

You fucking what?

You just assumed I was on the fucking pill, Dave!

Oh, so you're a liar now, as well?

- OK, right. - That's interesting.

- Yeah. - Wow.

OK. No, that's very interesting, because I trusted you.

But no, you have to break my trust. Wow. OK.

Probably never trust anyone ever again.

I'm actually... I'm seeing a whole other side to you, actually.

So thank God I'm getting out while I still can.

Just... Just...

..have a think for a moment.

Uh, yeah?

What kind of person is told that they're going to be a father

and responds like this?

Yeah. Well done. Very clever.

You'll need me in Singapore.

This is weird, Dave.

I know how hard it can be for a woman,

especially a beautiful woman,

to have to struggle in that environment

or, like, any environment

because of the patriarchy and, um, everyday sexism

and that thing you said men do

when their eyes keep glancing at your tits.

You're not coming to Singapore.

OK, um, look.

Pregnancy's actually a really hard time for a woman...

- We're splitting up. - ..mentally. So let's sleep on it.

We're splitting up, Dave.

I've told everyone I'm moving to fucking Singapore!

I...

They're really excited for me.

But no, you want to let all those people down.

Wow. OK. That's interesting.

Yeah, no, that's very interesting. Says a lot.

You are destroying your son.

Here we go.

You're trivial, you're selfish,

and your atheism is cheap, lazy and pretentious.

Oh, go and cry to Jesus, you fucking moron.

Go to church with your ugly fucking family.

- Go on. - OK. - Your mum is a fat bitch!

You will never find a man who loves you like I do!

OK.

So, tell me in your words why you're here.

Well, we've had, uh, three miscarriages...

..all in the past 14 months and with, um...

..different variations of horror,

and I think we just...

I don't know. Why are we here?

Yeah, no, I...

I think...

..just the same, really.

Uh, Lisa's been finding it really...hard

so...it's important, I think,

for us to come here...

..and...

..try and sort some of this out for her and, yeah, move on.

And what do you hope to get out of it?

I just want to help her, really.

I'll do anything.

And I've said that, haven't I? All along.

But what do you hope to get out of it for yourself?

Uh...

I'd just like her to feel like she's able to...

..move forward from it all

and then we can start trying again.

But what about for you?

I've just told you what for me.

I told you what I want for me.

I've told you like three times.

I can tell you again if you want me to tell you again.

Shall we stay in and watch a film on Saturday?

We haven't done that in ages.

We passed it.

There's this Danish film. Bear with me.

Sounds great.

It's about this couple whose house burns down.

You're really selling it to me.

Yeah.

But I've heard it's really good, and...

HE SIGHS

A Danish film about what? A couple whose house burns down?

OK, so one - it's Danish.

It gets good reviews.

Oh, those fuckers love anything if it's foreign.

Me wiping my arse would get a good review if I did it in Danish.

And two - their house burns down.

I mean, that's...

Like, that's real Saturday night feel good, isn't it?

I just thought it might be interesting to see...

Oh, did ya?

Thought a film about a house burning down might be interesting?

- OK. - That's real Saturday night. That's some real Tess Daly shit.

You don't get Tess Daly sitting there on a Saturday night

with fucking...

What's the husband called?

What's the husband called? Lisa.

What's the husband called?

DOORBELL RINGS

- Oh, hi. - Hi!

- Hello. - Oh, you're looking great.

Oh, thank you. You guys always look amazing.

BOTH CHUCKLE

- You get younger every year. - Oh, I don't know about that.

I do.

- The garage door. - Yes.

No, I was looking at it from the outside.

We've had it repurposed.

- Oh, wow. - Have a look if you like.

We finally got fed up of sharing an office.

ALL CHUCKLE

It's just been under Harry's bed.

No. Yeah, it's our, um...

I remember, it's our university stuff, isn't it?

Yeah.

There's a few bits of Harry's in there,

some CDs, a pair of gloves.

We're happy to keep it. It doesn't take up any room.

I think the lamp was your mum's.

Oh.

I'll, um...

I'll take it, yeah.

Thanks. Mum won't want the lamp.

ALL CHUCKLE

No worries.

No, you've got so much more room in here now.

Now I'm rid of him.

It is a much better use of the space.

It's been quite dramatic, actually.

And from the garage, I have a lovely view of the garden.

- You love the seasons. - Yes, the turning of the seasons.

- And you keep the car on the... - Just on the driveway, yeah.

It's fine most of the year.

And then in the winter we've got a windscreen cover so...

Oh, great. I've heard good things.

Oh, we swear by them.

Well, thanks for popping over.

Oh, no, it's been great to see you.

Lovely to see what you've done with the house.

It's been a game-changer.

Thank you.

Electric.

Yes.

Yeah, we're thinking of making the switch.

I think once the infrastructure's in place, a lot more people will.

I'm pregnant.

I didn't want to say it in front of Janice.

Congratulations.

I still love Harry, I promise you.

It was just a sort of, um...

..like a drawn-out fling.

I miss Harry, like I...

- It's OK. - No, I promise you, I miss him...

I miss him so much.

I dream about him.

And then I wake up and...

..and I'm alone.

I'm so alone, Richard.

I miss him so much, I promise you.

I...miss him every second of every day.

I promise you. I promise you.

- Here he is, eh! - Ha-ha! You all right, Dad?

Am I all right? Of course I'm all right.

Eh?

Uh, get a few beers inside you,

- you'll be more than all right! - Get out of it!

BOTH CHUCKLE

You getting taller or what?

I tell you, I could do with a drink after the day I've had.

- Oh, no. - Oh!

Oh!

- So, Pavel... - Oh, God.

Pavel had a client meeting about a flat roof replacement.

Looked like quite a simple one.

It would have fitted in a nice little gap

between a couple of much bigger jobs we've got lined up.

HE SIGHS

So he knows he's going to be late. What do you do?

You call ahead.

- Oh. - But this is Pavel.

HE CHUCKLES

He turns up 40 minutes late.

HAND-DRYER BLOWS

The client's furious, obviously!

Right, I'll see you up there.

Yeah.

DOOR CLOSES

Here we go. Ooh.

Fancy the old beer, hey?

HE SIGHS

How's your week been?

Let me sit down first.

- Heh! What do you need to sit down for? - It's my bones.

- I'm getting old. - If you're old, what am I?!

Ancient!

- Oh, look. He's thirsty tonight. - Mm.

- Gasping! - We'll be carrying you home. - HE CHUCKLES

- I've had one sip! - That's enough for you.

- PHONE RINGS It's enough for you, more like! - Oi!

Oh!

Going to have to take this. Hold on.

Pavel, mate, you're killing me...

- Sorry. - Dad, nah.

BOTH SIGH

Wrong glass.

Yeah, I noticed that.

I asked for the branded ones but, uh...

- It affects the flavour. - Thank you! Yes!

Tastes completely different.

They make them for a reason, don't they?

BOTH LAUGH

Mm.

Mm!

Ah...

- Ah. - Ah!

How's Lisa?

Let me have a drink first!

Again! I'm starting to worry about you!

BOTH CHUCKLE

No, Lisa's good, yeah.

Yeah.

Pregnant?

Nope.

No, it's all good.

Her parents are over.

Mm! Great.

Yeah, bit of company, eh?

- Mm, yeah, they'll have a nice chat. - Slagging you off.

Ears burning.

BOTH CHUCKLE

Yeah...

- No, they're going for a curry, so... - Nice, yeah.

Bit of... Bit of food. Bit of company.

Yeah. Time will do the rest, eh?

Oh, totally. Yeah.

Yeah.

And how are you?

I'm great, yeah.

- Great. - Yeah.

- All good. - Fantastic. - Yeah.

Great.

Yeah, no, it's...it's all like...

- Yeah. - Yeah.

- But... - It's all good, eh? - Yeah.

Obviously, some days can be a bit like...

Argh!

Yeah. But...

"Get me out of here! Get me out of here!"

But, uh, chin up, eyes forward, eh?

Yeah.

Keep calm, carry on.

- I love those posters. - Mm.

Yes. Yeah.

Keep calm, carry on!

BOTH CHUCKLE

Yeah, they're...

Yeah.

- You can get it on, like, a cup. - Can you?

Yeah, cups, T-shirts, posters. Amazing.

- Well, cheers. - Oh, cheers.

Sorry we haven't cheersed yet.

Oh, yeah! Sorry.

No, no, my bad. Should've thought of it before, eh?

Standards are slipping, my son, eh? Standards are slipping.

Get a few of these down us, eh?

Oh, it would be rude not to.

Ah...

KEVIN CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY

- And they'd sort of like rent... - Yes! - ..PA services from us,

but I do worry...

- It's fantastic. - I've said it before.

It's a fantastic idea.

Thanks. But I do worry...

- All of your ideas are fantastic. - It's true.

No, I sit there all day and I think,

"I wonder what my lovely Lisa's doing now,

"what exciting things are happening."

You succeed in everything, love. We're very proud.

Your work, your lovely marriage.

Everything's going so well for you.

Is everything OK with your food?

It's delicious.

It's absolutely perfect.

No, it's incredible. Thank you, though. It really is.

I've never eaten such a fantastic meal in all my life.

Honestly, Dad, I rinsed her.

And not just for her money either.

Can you hear me?

I was just saying I fucking... I got it every day.

Yeah, I can hear you, yeah.

Can you hear me?

Dad?

Yeah, so, uh, thanks for meeting up.

I, uh...

I just thought it would be good to...to go through this again.

Um...

I'm not sure I handled it very well, the first time.

Um, I think I'm quite instinctive as a person and... Oh, sorry.

Carry on.

Thank you.

I think I'm quite instinctive, um, as a person.

I act on my instincts, um, which is a good thing.

Uh, and I was kind of, um, ambushed

with, like, three pieces of bad news so...

You... You can't judge a person for how they respond in...

..in moments of high tension. I mean, you just can't.

It's like a scientific fact. They've done experiments.

And, uh, I suppose, like, to be honest,

you have kept this from me.

Not just me being banned from Singapore,

um, which I guess you've been plotting for a while,

uh, but the, uh, the pregnancy thing.

You could've told me at any point.

And you have kept that from me too.

And, I mean, that's...

You haven't really covered yourself in...

- ..in glory, to be honest... - Sorry, is this an apology?

Uh, what do you mean?

Well, it's got the shape of an apology

and the tone of an apology, but the content of an attack.

You're the one who's splitting us up!

Yeah.

You're the one who made me go all the way to your office,

which, by the way, was fucking mental.

This isn't a constructive response, Amanda.

Well, this is interesting.

You do know that my mum's dead, don't you!

Wow. OK.

So you're actually doing this to someone whose mum's dead.

Fucking hell.

Come on, I'm joking! I'm joking.

You take everything so seriously! Lighten up!

I've got something really important I need to tell you!

An hour! They were meant to be here

literally one hour five minutes ago.

- They've stood you up. - Uh, yeah, thanks, Kelly!

I mean, who does that?!

Who leaves their mate waiting for an hour?

I guess they just know how boring you are.

The cheek!

Can you believe this, Kelly? She's calling me boring. Ha!

And I thought me and you were getting on. Ha...

SHE CHUCKLES

SHE GROANS

Oh, shut the fuck up.

Don't speak to me like that, you prick.

It's Saturday night!

I am not having this conversation on a Saturday night.

Seriously?

What, it's Saturday night and you want me to watch

a bunch of Danish people crying because their house burnt down.

If you want to watch it, come now.

He said he was "all good". He literally said that.

He said he was "all good".

What do you want me to do, tell him he's not all good?

Oh, yeah, I'll do that, shall I?

"Hey, Stephen, son, your mum wants you to know you're not all good."

He said he was all good.

I was doing the dishwasher.

HE SIGHS

Torch.

He said he was "all good".

Are you stupid, or are you just pretending to be stupid?

Wow, that's rude.

Of course he said he was fine.

He just tells you what you want to hear.

Don't shake your head at me.

Can I eat my dinner?

Is that a crime too now, to want to eat my dinner? Mm?

Can I breathe? Is it OK if I breathe?

Oh, my God, you are such a dick.

You are being very rude.

Sitting there shaking your head at me.

I'm actually very disappointed that you're choosing

a Saturday night to have this conversation.

Are you having some more?

- We both know you're having it for breakfast... - Oh, even this?

- ..so what's the point? - Even having a go at me about this.

Every Saturday, where you tell me to have some more

- when we both know you ordered extra... - I'm being polite.

..so, you could have it for breakfast,

which actually, by the way,

the smell of it in the morning makes me want to puke.

This is what happens when I'm polite.

Sitting there eating Chinese for breakfast.

Great. Fine.

I won't bother in future.

I know what you're trying to turn this into and I'm not going there.

- Yeah, course you're not. - Neither of us are going there.

- Oh, are we not? - No. - Tell me you don't think about her.

We're not doing this.

You're fucking bollocks, Kevin. Tell me you don't think about her.

You spend your whole life trying not to think about her,

which is the same thing as thinking about her!

It's why you can't look Lisa in the eye.

It's why you were weird with her dad at the wedding.

And you were weird at Erin's wedding.

In fact, you're always a fucking dick at weddings

because every time you look at the bride,

you're thinking the same thing that I'm thinking.

You're thinking,

"That's what our daughter would have looked like on her wedding day."

Just fucking admit it, you prick!

Just fucking say something!

I am not having this conversation.

Great. Fuck yourself!

Where are you going?

Up your arse.

I'm not letting you leave.

What are you doing?

I am not having Stephen take us back there! It's not happening!

It's not happening! So sit down and eat your fucking dinner!

Do you even remember how mad you were?!

With your fucking happy pills

and your parents being fucking idiots

and your trips to the grave,

and me worried every time you leave the house

in case you lose your fucking nut again!

You were bonkers, Patty.

You were a fucking loon!

I'll see you later.

You can't drive Patty. You've been drinking.

Fuck yourself.

I'm sorry, Patty, you can't drive. You've been drinking!

You've been through what your son's going through

and you can't even talk to him about it.

- You can't drive. - What is it you're avoiding?

What is it you're scared you'll see if he looks into your eyes?

- You can't drive. You've been drinking. - Fuck yourself.

You can't drive, Patty. You've been drinking!

Fuck yourself!

HE SIGHS

HE GROANS

TV PAUSES

You all right?

Do you want another one?

Yeah.

CAN HISSES

PHONE PINGS

You've had a text from your dad.

He's sent a few.

- Oh, sorry. - Don't worry.

So what did you think of it?

What do you mean?

What do you think I mean?

Yeah.

I thought it was right up its own arse.

BOTH CHUCKLE

It was so slow.

They're full of it on here.

- No... - They reckon it's "lyrical."

Ha-ha. Of course they do...

- "Elegiac." - Ugh...

Too scared to admit they were bored.

Mm.

They love anything with subtitles.

PHONE PINGS

Your dad again.

TOILET FLUSHES

So what else did you think about the film?

HE SIGHS

What did you think about...

..what it showed about, like, a couple

going through, like...

..change or loss or...

Ugh.

HE CHUCKLES

You didn't like how it showed it, or...?

It was all...so up itself.

Yeah, it was.

- Yeah, so slow. - Yeah.

Right up its own arse.

And the bloke was annoying.

PHONE PINGS

You found the...the bloke annoying?

Yeah. He was so annoying.

In what way?

You found him annoying, didn't you?

Well, of course he was annoying. The whole film was annoying.

But...what did you find annoying about him?

What was it about him specifically you found annoying?

- Do you want to stop texting? - Yeah, yeah, let me just...

HE SIGHS

Just my dad talking...

He keeps asking if I'm all good.

Well, in that situation -

their house burnt down,

she's lost, like, all her stupid art stuff -

the husband's job is to be there for her, look after her,

and instead he's going around making it all about him.

He lost a load of stuff too.

No, but compared to like...

PHONE PINGS

So, he...

He's crying and having a breakdown or whatever,

but what does that achieve?

He's allowed to cry.

No, I know he's allowed to cry. Of course he's allowed...

Can you just listen to what I'm saying?

I am listening.

OK.

When stuff happens to us, for example,

it's not for me to, like...wallow, is it?

It wasn't me that lost the babies. It's you it happened to.

It's you that had to have the...

..whatever.

I've got to keep, like, positive,

head up, eyes open, move forwards, keep calm, carry on.

I'm just, like, keeping...

..keeping on with my life.

It's you that had to actually...

..deal with the, like...the...

..physicality.

But it did happen to you.

No, it wasn't my body, was it?

It wasn't my body that had to go through all that...

But they were your babies.

No, listen to what I'm saying...

They were your babies.

- You're not listening to me. - They were your babies.

Can you... Can you just let me speak? Is that OK?

Don't get annoyed at me.

I'm not getting annoyed at you.

- OK. - I'm not getting annoyed.

I only had to deal with, like, the...disappointment,

if you want to call it that, and, like, the...crisis

in the moment, which was fine.

I was fine with that.

And there is a level of, like, readjustment, I guess...

They were your babies.

But what I'm trying say is, I didn't have to...

They were your babies.

- Can you stop saying that? - They were your babies, though.

Why are you being so annoying?

Jesus.

They were your babies.

We made three babies together.

And they all died.

It's OK to wallow.

It's OK if you don't know what to do.

It's OK to be broken.

Your babies died.

HE SOBS

I'm good. Sorry.

No, don't...don't be sorry.

HE LAUGHS Fucking hell, darling, sorry.

It's OK if you need to...

I'm good, honestly.

My point is, OK...

Can you not interrupt me, please? Cos it's, like, really annoying.

OK.

I'm trying to, like, say something and you're just like...

They have him all, like, serious and sad and crying and stuff

and, oh, boo-hoo, he goes to see a therapist,

spending 100 quid an hour, or whatever it is

these fucking people pay,

but what they're actually missing is he's a mug.

- A mug? - Yeah, he's a mug.

OK.

He... He's all like, "Oh, yeah, great, we're married.

"It's all going to be fine.

"Let's just cross our fingers and hope for the best

"and be, like, happy and smiley

"and we're all going to live happily ever after,"

but he hasn't got a clue.

He hasn't got a fucking clue!

That's what they never show.

They have to make him all...

..all serious and important, but the guy is just a mug.

He's a child. He's pathetic.

He's embarrassing.

HE SIGHS

You'd better get used to an early start

when you have the baby.

Yeah, I'm often up early for work.

Yeah, but how early?

Four, five.

Yeah, but I bet that's on a full night's sleep, is it?

Not always.

OK.

A TENS machine?

Yeah, I'm not sure what good a TENS machine will be

when you've got a baby clambering out of your vagina.

"Oh, don't worry about the epidural! She's got a TENS machine."

Amanda's got a TENS machine, Mum, for the birth.

A TENS machine? OK...

I'm just imagining the midwife.

Oh, Kimberley!

"Don't worry about the epidural. She's got a TENS machine."

Yeah. You might need more than a TENS machine, love.

Well, that's what I've been telling her.

DAVE ON ANSWERING MACHINE: I think it's just...

..the way that you went about it.

Making me go all the way to your office.

And I know I could have done a lot of things differently, but...

You know when you cook, like,

a burger from frozen and the outside's all...

..all warm and cooked

and the middle bit's still solid ice?

That's you.

Where the hell have you being?

Did you stop at Chicken Cottage?

- Did you stop at Chicken Cottage? - No.

No, I've been tracking you.

I saw you, Gavin. You stopped at chicken cottage.

Don't lie to me.

I saw you accept my journey

and then for 13 minutes your car paused outside Chicken Cottage.

I can smell the bloody chicken!

VACUUM CLEANER RUMBLES

I found this.

Yeah, there's some real classics in there.

I used to sing them with my nan.

We could sing some if you...

..if you get a minute.

Hey. How was work?

That was a long one, wasn't it?

Why are you so late?

HE SOBS

Hey...

Hey.

Did you just put the ketchup away?

Yeah. Sorry.

No, sorry.

Oh... I thought you'd finished with it.

- No, I haven't used it yet. - Oh, I'm sorry.

No, sorry, it's me, I'm all over the place.

SHE LAUGHS

Just eat it.

What? What?

You said you were hungry!

Rar!

THEY LAUGH

MUSIC PLAYS ON RADIO

Do you just say things so I'll stop talking?

Is that what you...?

OK. There's no...

There's no way of saying this without sounding rude.

No, go on.

Did I tell you what happened last night when I was leaving?

Are you talking to me?

TOILET FLUSHES

So it was, like, quarter to five and she calls me in...

Quarter to five?!

Yeah.

I'm basically packing up my bag at quarter to five.

Mentally I'm already in the car.

HE LAUGHS

So she calls me in, says we need to have another chat

about putting together a new HR policy.

That is so boring.

Right, that... That literally couldn't be any more boring.

There's only six of us in the office!

You did an HR policy last year, didn't you?

11 months ago!

There's only six of us work there!

Why do we need a HR policy?!

What's that?

11 months ago!

I checked my emails!

There's only six of us work there!

You did an HR policy last year, didn't you?

Lisa?

Didn't you do an HR policy last year?

# Your dreams are up in arms because they say can't compete with you

# When you stop the day with a little syllable

# Left unfinished

# When you move to kiss me

# Now each word bursts like a volcano

# Cos there's nowhere else for this love to go

# I grabbed a cable and a microphone

# Cos there's nowhere else for this love to turn

# And I, I just can't believe

# I found someone the same as me. #

Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0