Original subtitles

...or it'll hurt ya eyes.

Lay it on... Cover up.

A shot...

What are you doin'? Still in overalls, Hon'?

You promised you'd take me shoppin'.

Shoppin'...

Alberto, can you go, eh?

So's I can finish the door.

Can ya'?

- Alright, boss, I'll change. - Do me this favor.

But without this.

Right, babe?

So's I can finish the door.

I have to buy new clothes, nothin' fits anymore.

Buy 'em.

It's embarrassing.

Of what?

- He's got a degree. - An' so?

He'll have more taste than me for clothes, for stuff like this.

I don't understand a thing, but ya always take me...

He's a genius for clothes.

Sorry.

I'll increase your beta-blocker

and we'll make an appointment for the CAT scan and tomoscintigraphy.

My father died at 43.

Heredity isn't the only factor.

Can I talk to your wife?

No.

You can't talk to my wife.

Let me talk to your wife.

I'm of-age, tell me.

Can I have the instruction booklet?

If I have this right, here's the in and out.

- Ingenious. - It's for nursing.

Is it your first baby?

Do you do mail small gifts?

It's possible.

And is it possible for you to give me your number?

- How's it on me? - Nice.

Is there another color?

Mocha,

sea and moss.

Then...

We want turd, sky and vomit.

Why don't we use outrageous names like blue, brown or green?

- Suit yourself, those are the colors. - I will!

Rome is a wonderful city.

The sky from Margherita Bridge at dusk.

The shop assistants too, you're matchless, unrivaled.

The most troglodyte in the world.

Should I try vomit?

Diarrhea, like your eyes.

You're strange, you always tell people what they're like,

but what are you like?

I don't want to know, I have no inside, just outside,

sky, buildings, traffic, people...

I'm a neo-realist.

I was thinking asshole.

But you always get it right.

You're easy.

You're a classic heroine.

Know how long I've been studying the Odyssey?

You may impress Angelo, but not me.

In the various translations, I'm looking for a clue,

maybe Penelope banged her suitors.

- Then I'd like to return as Ulysses. - And show 'em what's what.

Maybe then I'd fall in love at least once.

That'd be nice.

Haven't seen him for a while.

Sweetie, where's Pa?

I dunno.

Where's Angelo?

He's not here, Perla is.

Where's your Pa?

- What do I know? - What's he doin'?

We're sorry. The wireless customer is unavailable...

Ma!

- What? - Where's that good-for-nothin'?

- Must be around. - With who? Alberto's here.

With who he wants, he's not in jail.

Hon', I got so scared!

Where were you?

With a customer I forgot about.

Don't always hang on like a bat.

Where's Alberto?

I left 'im in the garage.

Get 'im a room ready.

- He's sleepin' here? - His girlfriend left him.

So we'll be his girlfriend?

Poor guy.

They left him all alone.

He says he's never been in love.

Don't believe 'im, he shits his pants.

Ya know how much he'd love a family?

But if he acts like he does,

who'll have 'im?

You're wrong,

I think a guy like that can give a lot,

to a woman, to kids...

Weird things...

but nice.

It's a greater loneliness, not only in my relationship to others.

Something's changed in my world, I have no bearings, I'm homeless.

No home.

That's right.

That's it.

What the hell's going on?

Nothin'.

Don't meddle with it.

I'm not going to the lake, it's boring.

You're comin', school's out.

You can't always be hangin' around with those dimwits.

I'll hang around who I like, and you know them!

How can you call them dimwits?

- Forget her, she'll be with me. - Don't butt in!

But she wants to stay with me!

Put this stuff in, I gotta pack Alberto's suitcase.

Irto, your junk's everywhere!

Is he going to the lake with you?

What are you doin'?

You washed his underwear? Why?

Why?

That's the question.

- Holy shit, it's come back to life! - See, it survived you.

- Hey, I mounted the gaskets! - Right!

- What's the charge on the Rolls? - Depends to who.

To me.

- You wanna go in that? - Really?

Ayo, help my wife!

- We're takin' the Rolls? - You are.

I'm comin' with you.

Why?

I gotta move the Fiat.

I'll catch up when the paint's dry.

- Can you drive it? - 'Course, it's mine.

Go slow.

Taking the Casilina road?

A little music? Ready?

Holy shit, what an atmosphere!

Excellent!

- Lower... - Musical crescendo.

Shouldn't we get into it? Almost makes you want to get married.

- When's Pa coming? - Now.

Your gift came.

Feel it.

Don't be scared, feel it!

It's already moving. I'm pregnant.

My husband had a heart attack,

I don't cry every minute, but I'd like to.

What are you after?

What have you understood? The gift's for Angelo, dummy.

Show him a good time.

I'm squeamish with newborns, let alone fetuses... overgrown sperm.

I don't like them.

Relax.

Sorry.

Thank you.

For the long johns and all the rest.

It's behind a house... No, from behind a house...

Up high, they're shooting from above.

How do you invent stories?

Look at me, see it?

- What? - The story.

Define me in three words.

- Noisy. - Okay.

Bald.

Not okay, good the first one.

There was a man who spoke too loud. Why do people speak loud?

- To be heard. - Good.

There was a man who spoke too loud, he thought no one listened to him.

Hon'.

Look what he gave me.

What did he give you?

It's pretty, underwear for pregnant women.

What the fuck's he want?

Always with this "fuck"!

Calm down!

He's a friend of mine.

You don't have friends.

Now I got one.

I met him in Intensive Care, not at the beach.

- Where ya going? - Gettin' some air, it's too crowded.

After his heart attack he got well and he could finally be quiet.

Why was he quiet?

Because someone finally listened to him.

It's a beautiful ending, Jung-like.

Do you know Prof. Jung?

He was a genius, he cataloged every type of psychology.

I like your work.

This is Carla, leave a message if you want, otherwise bye.

How do these panties unhook?

I'm not unhookin' 'em tonight.

You can fool everyone, but not me.

What's the matter?

Why won't you answer me?

What's in your head? Why let another man buy me underwear?

- What'll you do alone? - I'm not alone, you're not dead.

You'll go into a thousand pieces, crumblin' like a windshield.

I'm not alone, you're not dead.

You're here and you're stayin'.

If you dare die, I'll kick your ass!

What's this tone of voice?

While I'm here, I'm in charge.

You're gonna gimme some, ya hear?

Let go.

You gotta unhook it.

Let go.

Got a cigarette?

You can't smoke.

You can?

What grade are you in?

I flunked out.

Why?

What a fucking question!

I'm talking because I want a cigarette,

give me one and I'll leave.

I won't.

I won't drop dead at your feet from one cigarette.

My girlfriend left me, I had a heart attack

and I can't work like I want.

Why'd she leave you?

What a fucking question!

I'm finally smoking!

You're finally laughing!

It's a wonderful evening.

When she's pissed off she sleeps on the couch.

Why do you piss her off?

You gotta start seein' what a woman's like.

Wanna be alone your whole life?

You know, one night I thought seriously about getting married?

You?

I was happy, I was writing for a director I liked.

I felt good.

I wanted a beer, but couldn't find the bottle-opener.

Then...

The pain!

- What did you do? - My tooth broke off.

I said to myself: "I want a wife, a mortgage, a baby...

- A station wagon". - Better a turbo diesel SUV.

I really thought so!

"And I want a Labrador who watches me from behind. "

Then, with the effect of the anesthesia,

I thought maybe a scooter was enough, a cat, a girlfriend.

At most a screw!

- Why are you looking at me like that? - Meanin'?

Where are you looking at me from, that's the question.

I'm lookin' at you with the eyes of love.

We'll sleep all snuggly.

Stop!

You're giving me the creeps!

Don't reject me...

Strange,

I'm fine.

- You liked it? - We haven't done it yet!

With this heart attack you've learned the true sense of life!

I learned there's no fuckin' thing to learn.

You sound like Pyrrhus.

He was a skeptic philosopher,

he didn't believe in the truth, not even in the senses.

He'd cross the street without looking

and in fact, he got run over by a chariot!

- Give me your hand... - Please!

God, what noise!

Quiet, we'll wake everyone.

Holy shit, what a laugh.

Just think what my wife's thinkin'!

Hon'?

Want the light out?

Now somethin' serious.

- I'll take care of you, okay? - Depends.

INCOMING CALL CARLA

CALL REJECTED

LET'S NOT BE IN TOUCH FOR A WHILE

THAT'S THE QUESTION

SENDING MESSAGE

Glasses are a fundamental tool for a story-teller.

Here we have an interesting model.

Put these glasses on and look around.

Look at everybody, then pick one person.

With these glasses you can see the story better.

You can choose one for being nice or not nice,

but especially, choose the story-teller you want to be.

It's a solemn moment, you're ready.

Look around.

A baby's crying, investigate right away.

Ask yourself questions, don't give answers.

Why does his grandfather hate him? Why did she run out of fuel?

What's that man's job?

Why is Mrs. Adelina glad to be a widow?

Give her a name right away.

- Mary. - Carrie and Sherrie.

I think Lorenzo sells drugs.

I think his name's Claudio and he buys them.

Mrs. Peruzzi's back to health.

Before you pick, observe gestures, voices, expressions.

- Is everything alright? - Yes, thank you.

I pick him.

Why?

- Because he limps. - He's from Abruzzo.

- How do you know? - Perfect pitch.

What's a lame man from Abruzzo doing here?

That's the question, the answer is the story.

Go see if the cashier is from Abruzzo.

Dive in where's it's muddy.

The right way.

- Well? - She's from Abruzzo too.

Excellent.

There they are!

Where's Angelo?

- You get here by car? - Yeah, I drove.

I left them in the pizzeria.

Good for you.

I'll just sit a second, I feel a little...

You know you're the only man in the world that trusts me?

I have to say something but you have to listen.

What game are you playing?

I'm not indestructible.

Besides, guys like me don't appeal to the Rossanas, understand?

What have you understood?

Goddammit, what did I do wrong? You didn't seem so stupid!

I don't get it!

I think you do get it now.

But let's just be quiet some.

Let's see if you can.

Your maximum was 20%?

See, you can't be quiet.

You lose.

Bartaloni Angelo?

Treasury Police.

A tax inspection's taking place at the company's registered office.

Here we inspect personal documents, computers, discs and other materials.

- You know my husband's been ill? - I'm sorry.

Excuse me.

This isn't my expertise,

but has such a massive search been authorized?

I've already shown Bartaloni the warrant.

I'll call a lawyer.

Hi, Paola, it's Alberto.

Could you put Renato on?

Would you buy an affair between a girl dressed as an Alpine soldier

and a gay partisan commander?

You have to do me a favor, I need a shark, right away.

I found an error of form which may get you out almost alive.

You'll pay a big fine just the same and it serves you right!

But at least they won't shut you down.

We've searched land and sea for you for three months,

you were hiding out here?

- We're done. - Good.

Thank you.

Goodbye.

Let's go.

- I'm leaving. - Thank you, Renato.

Don't mention it.

You three,

get in touch.

I'm interested in your story.

What are you looking for?

- Where are the bank statements? - There.

With the spaghetti?

- How much is in this account? - Cash, about 200,000.

700 in a money market and 400 more in a CD for 5 years.

Let's say this account doesn't exist.

Why worry, it's in my name.

This account doesn't exist not even for you.

Okay?

You gotta burn all the papers in the house.

Call the bank tomorrow and tell 'em not to send you anything else,

say you're leavin' on a trip.

Understand?

They keep the papers there.

What stinkers... Now that you haven't been well...

They don't give a damn.

Listen...

If anything happens to me...

- What can happen to you? - Let me talk!

If anything happens to me, I said "if",

give everything to Rossana, you keep 100

and 100 goes to my friend Alberto.

- Are you dumb? - This ain't no argument.

Okay?

It's all written here.

We're sleepin' here tonight.

If the kids sleep with me, we'll fit.

- Why? - Why what?

No whys, we're sleepin' here.

We'll leave Mom in peace while she tidies up,

it's a mess.

What?

Mom's scared to stay at the lake alone.

Can I cook the spaghetti?

What time will they be back?

They won't be.

We're all alone?

Then I'll eat you!

I've never screwed a pregnant woman,

I'm also missing a nun and a contortionist.

What's the matter? Can't you tell when I'm joking?

He's gone crazy.

Why?

Pa...

What's wrong?

- You scare me. - Why?

You look...

I look?

How do I look?

Nice.

I saw Dr. Ricci, since you never do.

Your coagulation is better,

they want you for another stress test.

Seems you'll have to live your life.

I'm going back to mine, which really isn't so bad.

Where ya gonna go?

You're beautiful.

A question: why did you choose this work?

It's Rossana,

I think... she's crying.

We didn't risk an angioplasty,

if we administer drugs we could attempt a quadruple by-pass.

I'm here.

I put the keys to the Fiat on the sun visor.

For what?

For your birthday.

It's in three months.

So you have time for drivin' school.

You gotta get your license, you're a little man now.

Pa!

I'll show you something.

Someone's shooting at the seagulls, who do you think it could be?

A cop?

Crazy.

What's he doing...

here...

that crazy cop?

That's the question.